Chapter 31 - Permission To Love
He looks very calm. But for him to be here immediately, the girl is definitely his concern.
Hyunkel is in the castle of the Ghost Shadow Force, talking to Mitsuto.
"Why does she lose all memories?" He asks.
"Human beings who have a pure heart can't take our power for granted. It heals her in the beginning and will destroy her eventually, either physically or mentally."
"In her case it's the amnesia."
"A natural outcome, nothing can be done. Dark magic works perfectly on human beings if you aim to harm them: attack, erase memories or any other kinds of brain damages..." Misuto stands in front of Hyunkel. "Since she has no idea about her identity and anything else now, she is no threat. Vearn sama permits her to stay with you."
Can you see the temptation is his eyes, Vearn sama? He will say Yes.
"Please convey my gratitude to Vearn sama." As Misuto's expectation, Hyunkel agrees after a short while.
"In addition, I want to keep the flying creature, the only living being Marm carries to the Underground Castle. I want it to accompany her."
The atmosphere turns into a silence. When Hyunkel looks at Misuto, he has a feeling the mysterious General of the demon force is no longer in the room.
I understand, Vearn sama.
"You can keep it." Misuto says slowly. "And you mustn't open the cage. It must be there forever."
...
In the Underground Castle, Marm is still awake. She is not aware of a fact that she is all alone by herself, doing the same thing hour after hour.
"Why do you sleep?" She murmurs to Gome. Having no sense about time and no ability to remember anything, she doesn't know that she has repeated this question so many times.
"You like it?"
Marm turns back and looks at him who has just questioned her. No idea who he is. However, she feels like answering.
"Not really. It keeps sleeping."
Marm passes the cage to Hyunkel and plays with the reflection of the light, something new that is catching her attention.
"You are right..." He knows the cage is locked by dark magic spells. Why using such a strong power to remain the harmless creature in unconsciousness? He wonders.
He puts the cage aside when feeling Marm's body leaning on him. She is yawning.
Initially she forgot why was she in the maze, then all other memories slipped through continuously. She quickly doesn't remember who he is and has no idea about her own identity in the end.
It's still Marm who is sitting next to him. But she is no longer herself. Her mind doesn't function well enough for a normal adult. All are his faults.
"Let's go to sleep." He walks Marm to the bedchamber.
The suggestion of Misuto is never under his consideration and will never be.
If dark magic doesn't work for her, I can try heal spells of human mages. Thinkings are running in his mind when he looks at Marm as she is sleeping.
And he himself falls asleep gradually.
In his dream, he sees Avan. He has not seen Avan for about ten years but the senario is very true, seems like it just happened yesterday.
"What is this?" He asks.
Avan is arranging some items into a box. These items are very familiar, he must have seen them somewhere.
"I'm going to have a second student. This is a weapon I prepare for her, not much for attacking but for the benefits of defending and healing." Avan tells him happily.
Seeing his serious face, the sensei adds, "No worry, she is a cute little girl, you guys will be good friends."
"I don't have time for friends, sensei." He answers firmly. He is eleven now, full of intention to revenge.
"Come on, be more friendly." The sensei tries to cheer him up and smiles. "We are going to..."
Romos. Hyunkel remembers.
"What for? You are teaching me the Sky Slash, aren't you?"
"Hmmm... I'm not sure... You need more practices, Hyunkel. Now go catch some fish for our dinner while I put Behoma spell into the final bullet."
That last sentence wakes him up.
Marm is the second student Avan mentioned years ago and her weapon is that magic gun.
If they are lucky, the bullet with Behoma spell, a strongest heal spell that was casted by Avan must still be there.
He has the gun and its bullets box delivered to him immediately. The moment he sees a bullet named Behoma, he almost wakes Marm up. However, his mind changes after a second of thought.
...
"Follow me." Hyunkel holds Marm's hand. He is pretty sure she will forget what he says after a short while and she may get lost here.
"I want to take it along." Marm points at Gome.
"No problem... Why do you want to carry it?" He asks. He wants to have as many conversations with her as he can even these conversations won't stay long in her memory.
"Feel like doing so."
"Wanna give it a name?"
Marm is hesitating for a short while and looks at him, "No... I think it already has one... but I don't remember."
"No worry, you will, soon." Gently, he tells her.
And he holds her hand, walking her to his own library.
"Hyunkel sama, how about the training today?" The short demon is waiting for him along the corridor.
"Get them carry on as usual. Any clues where Dai is?"
"Not yet, Sir. But the unusual rain hasn't happened since last night, I suspect something is going on at the enemy's side."
Hyunkel remembers Pop and several guards of princess Leona quite excel at magics. Very likely a plan has started, and this means an attack to his headquarter is coming soon.
He doesn't bother.
He is aware of the gap between himself and these opponents from Papunika.
The only thing he bothers now is time. He needs enough time to heal Marm and arrange her escape.
"If they come, lure them to the arena and inform me."
...
"I have to read about magic spells. It may take a while." He explains to Marm.
Ever since she loses memories, all conversations are initiated by him. He talks more than usual, he is slightly different, all happen without his notice.
Marm looks at the book that takes so much of his attention. Somehow she understands the texts, she points on the page that he is reading.
"Wipe...memories..."
"You know language of the demon world?" He is surprised.
Marm doesn't reply him, the page catches her interest and she murmurs the reading softly.
"Ok, read from here." He asks her and is glad when she follows. He wraps his arm around her waist and keeps her in the embrace. That's the way they read together.
They spent the whole morning there. Marm got bored in the middle and she quickly shifted interests to other books.
Since she doesn't seem to have intention to tear off pages like what his minions did, Hyunkel lets her play with any books she likes and continues the reading by himself.
"You must be hungry now. Time for lunch." He pats on Marm's shoulder. Marm seems very focusing, the cage that keeps Gome is placed next to her.
Marm looks at him and smiles. Smiles of Marm always erase the creases between his brows.
"Why smile like this?" He asks. Gleams of joy are seen in his eyes.
"In the book." Marm giggles.
His eyes open widely when he sees the page, not because of a drawing of Gome that Marm is pointing at, but because of the chapter headline which states, Tear Of God.
Tear Of God - a divine item able to grant wishes for the pure of heart.
He reads the whole chapter and walks her out of the room, carrying the cage along.
...
The sunshine is too bright for Marm, freaking her out. "Where's here?" She asks Hyunkel, hiding herself behind him.
"Land of Papunika."
Soon when her eyes are used to the sun, Marm finds the weather a pleasant one. Sky is beautiful in blue, yet the place is full of ruins and collapses.
She follows Hyunkel. Gradually she recognises him. Since he always talks to her, she remembers his voice. Since he is always by her side, she remembers the feeling.
Rather than that, there is no memory of him, just like there is nothing else in her mind at any time being.
Hyunkel takes Marm to a river near by the entrance of Underground Castle. They are going leave the darkness for a while. Perhaps the dream has affected him. He feels like making a same memory with Marm, even this memory is going to be momentary for her.
Marm sees him stepping into the water, topless, and focused. Then she gets so excited when he catches a fish. That smile of her in the breeze of autumn has warmed his heart completely.
The afternoon goes on softly. Marm keeps playing with the water when he grills the fish. They have lunch together, Marm eats quietly and so does him. The pleasant sunshine of autumn is a fine component to the sound of silence surrounded them.
"Where is this place?" Marm asks.
"Land of Papunika." He repeats.
"I want to go there." Marm points at the river eagerly.
"The water temperature is low, you will catch a cold. You have played there for several times."
"Have I? Do I always forget things?" She questions.
"Not always." He lets her sitting on him and wraps his arms around her.
Marm is immediately comforted by the warmth of him. Soon she wonders why she doesn't want to go anywhere anymore.
And still keeps Marm in his arm, he makes a cast to open Gome's cage, brings the little creature out. Gome is still sleeping.
"This is a Tear of God. It can grant wishes to somebody like you. Having it along, you will be safe."
Hyunkel places Gome on Marm's hands. Seeing her being lovely with the blushed cheeks, his heart is moved. Is it him or she is the most beautiful person ever. That's enough. He reminds himself.
"I will let it sleep here." Marm happily removes the scarf around her neck and loosens her outfit in front of him. She gently puts Gome on her bare chest and smiles to Hyunkel. "I don't want it to be captured again."
"Sometimes you are not an angel..." He smiles, enjoys looking at what catch his immediate attention. And he pulls her closer to him, circles her halfnaked body in his arms. "Can you leave your clothes this way for a liltle while?"
"Yes, I can..." Marm finds her heart beats fast. She eyes on him with hesitation before kissing him on the cheek.
"What is this?" He asks.
"I don't know." Marm faces herself into his chest, "What are we doing?"
"We shouldn't be doing anything." He forces himself saying this and helping her to put on the outfit. "Do you really want to keep that flying creature...there?"
"Yes" Marm is happy with the decision.
When Marm is ready, he helps her to stand up and they are heading back to the Underground Castle.
"I know I forget everything quickly." Walking behind him, she says. "But I can always feel you being by my side. Who are you?"
"No point to tell... You will forget anyway."
"Then you can keep reminding me."
"Remind me to remind you." He replies.
As Marm bursts into smiles, he steps closer and whispers to her ear, "I'm Hyunkel."
"Hyunkel, Hyunkel." Marm murmurs to herself. She likes his name.
"You have more important things to remember." He shows her the magic gun. "This is yours."
"Wow..." Another beautiful smile is on her lips, pleasing him more than she can ever know.
"I'm keeping it for a while before returning to you."
"Ok. Remember to return it to me."
...
"Come in, be careful."
They are already back to the Castle. Time flies. He watches her steps with concern before deciding to hold her hand and lead her from here.
The further they walk, the darker the area becomes. Marm prefers those beautiful sunshines up there.
"When will we be back to that place?" She stops and asks him.
"All will be fine." He promises.
When they keep walking for a little more, Marm's mind has become completely blank. The memory of a beautiful autumn afternoon spent with him at the riverside no longer exists for her. She quietly follows the man in front of her. She knows him, although having no idea who he is.
"Hyunkel sama, Dai and his company are on the way. They will reach here in a couple of hours."
"Same plan. Lure them to the arena, keep them away from the maze."
He sees the skeleton soldier who informed him about Marm earlier among the force. "You, follow me."
Hyunkel takes Marm and the skeleton soldier into the maze where hundreds of prison cells are located. He knows exactly which one is for Marm.
The moment steps into the small and dark corridor, Marm immediately dislikes the place.
"Why are we here?"
"You will find wind blowing from this side along the corridor. Then you will see a small passageway up there." He says calmly, "Follow direction of the wind and you will go to the place where sunshine is."
He knows, for someone who is as smart as Marm when she is healed, figuring out a connection between the wind and the exit is not a problem. But incase she can't get the idea, she will act accordingly based on this intuition that he is creating for her.
"Walk toward the wind?" Marm asks Hyunkel.
"Yes. Will you?"
"Why should I?" Marm doesn't like this place at all. It's dark and narrow. Not interested.
"So you can reunite with your friends and the sunshine that you like." He walks her into the prison cell without her notice.
Marm is confused. "Friends...?" and she is stunned, seeing him holding a gun and aiming at her.
"Don't be scared, Marm, this will be fast."
Marm?
Light coming from the gun is so bright and its pressure is so strong that Marm loses balance. Before falling down, Marm is hardly conscious. Shortly she feels surrounded by an aura. Somewhere from her memory, she remembers this must come from a kind of heal spell, a strong one that even her mother and Matoriv can't conduct. Among all mages she has ever known, only Avan sensei is capable of... This is Behoma.
Marm...
The first thing she sees are his gentle eyes.
"I'm alive?"
"Yes, you are... Remember who am I?" He looks very tense.
"No.." Marm looks at him and shakes her head.
That definitely disappoints him.
"You have to remind me to remind you." Marm bursts into smiles.
"Seriously..." Hyunkel immediately realises Marm is teasing him, yet he can't stop himself from embracing her tightly, he can't help feeling happy and relieved. "Remember everything?" He checks again.
Marm nods. Yes, she does. She was attacked by hundreds of soldiers in this Immortal Force and she couldn't win the battle. She remembers his dark power inside her, seemed healing her but gradually eating out her mind. She remembers Hyunkel taking care of her, talking to her more than anybody believe he would. She remembers they read a book together and had a good time along the river side. She remembers the Underground Castle and the first kiss, she remembers they made love.
"Sorry, Marm. I never expect you to get hurt in this place."
"It's Ok. You have tried your best to heal me. You know... Behoma? Did our sensei teach you...?"
"Not me. What heals you is this bullet casted by Avan."
Marm looks at the empty bullet with surprise. "But... the only Behoma bullet casted by sensei, I used it long time ago."
After some moments of being not sure how did it happen, Marm remembers Pop took all her bullets a few days back. "I know, it's Pop. I can't believe he knows Behoma spell."
"Him?" Hyunkel feels disturbed. Somehow the idea that Marm is healed by Avan is better.
"Most probably. Pop helped me to put spells into all bullets. I'm not good at magic casts."
"Marm, you are not that strong as others. Why do you insist in risking your life joining Dai?"
"I can become better. When there is a will, there is a way, isn't it?"
"Sure."
"How about you? Why do you insist sensei is the culprit?"
He slightly shakes his head, "I don't feel like talking about this."
"You don't have any proof and you didn't witness anything, am I right?"
"I was not there from the beginning. When I ran to my father, he was vanishing. Avan stood behind us, smiling at me when I looked at him." With a calm voice, he tells her. "In your eyes and for rest of human beings, Avan was a hero excelling his duty. For I myself, as a son of the Immortal soldier, he was an enemy that won the battle against us. Even if he didn't kill my father, all other soldiers of the Immortal Force were destroyed because of him. So, I don't need a proof or witness. You can prove me wrong, but none of these changes my mind."
"Even if it was someone, or something from the demon world that was the real culprit of your father's death?"
"What do you mean?"
"Everyone in this place was revived when Hadlar came back to live, except your father. If he was killed by an human being like Avan sensei just like others, why is here the difference?"
Marm is expecting Hyunkel to consider her discovery. To her disappointment, it doesn't seem so. He doesn't answer anything.
"Why wasn't your father revived?" Marm insists.
"Because of the way Avan ended his life." His voice turns to a cold one. "You are right. My father had a chance to be revived together with Hadlar and the rest. But Avan did a terrible thing to him, my father was broken into... pieces before vanishing. So he wasn't able to be back."
"No... what I mean is..."
"This is what the truth means."
From his furious look that show hatred and coldness, Marm knows no point keep talking to him on the matter. He is more determined than she thought, his bonding with the demon world is stronger than her biggest assumption.
"I understand now." She gets out of his embrace and tries to stand up on her own.
"What do you understand?"
"You have already given my sensei a death sentence from the beginning. It's just a natural decision for you, just like the way you belong to the demon world."
"I have told you a lot of times. Don't..."
Seeing Marm's eyes turn red and her shoulder trembling, he can't complete the sentence.
Marm is not able to control emotions. Stronger than her anger and disappointment, something in her heart has just collapsed. Marm is not sure what it is, but it has collapsed.
Marm wipes tears away, heart is broken but voice needs to be strong. "Next time when we meet, we are just enemies."
"Look here."
Marm turns back and feels a kiss on her forehead.
"What is it now?" She looks at him, feels like he is him again.
"I made you cry."
"You love this demon world in a ridiculous way."
"I have never thought of any other emotional attachment to this place except a fact that I belong here." He cups her face in his hands. She is an angel who makes him happy, lightens up his life here just by being around.
But angel should not cry and angel doesn't live here.
"When you were first captured, you faced me without any special emotions. It would have been much happier that way for you, wouldn't it?" He asks. There is a seriousness showed in his face.
"I don't know. When I first met you, I wanted to discover about you, wanted to approach and understand you." Marm steps backward, she is sad. "Next time when we meet, I won't be able to care for you the way I did. "I'm... afraid that you will be very lonely here and I... I want you to be taken care well. Hyunkel, why don't you join us? I... love you."
Do I? How to know if it's love?
Marm is confused by herself after a sudden confession she made.
"It may not be that kind of love, you know?" He hugs her, his heart is already melted, yet he knows he has to be determined. "But don't love me. I will never deserve your love regardless of what type it is." He kisses her hair without her notice. "I'm going to remove everything about me in your memory."
Marm looks at him with surprise, unable to believe what she has just heard.
"Times I made you happy are far fewer than times I dragged you into troubles and dangers. You were in troubles here because of the unconditional care and love you have for me, not the love of a woman for a man, but a precious one that is coming from your kind heart and I can never value it enough. When my dark power destroyed your mind, I was very scared and regretted. Nothing is more beautiful in this world than your smiles, Marm. Yet I consistently find you worried about me, struggling to get me be at the human side, I even see you crying and getting badly hurt. I never forget how bad did you get injured because of me. I don't deserve all these, Marm."
She stands still, can't say anything.
"If I had known you better, if I had known that you are such an angel, such a sweetheart ..." He hesitates, gently stroking her hair, "I wouldn't have slept with you. But in a selfish way, I feel very good that we did."
"What do you mean by feel very good?" Marm asks, her cheeks are blushed. "If you remove those parts of my memories, how about yours? Will you forget me?"
"Of course I won't." He confirms. "Let me do it. It doesn't hurt."
That's not fair. "Hyunkel, do you love me?" Marm asks him. She looks serious and more mature than she normally appears.
At that point of time, Hyunkel has not known that Marm is one of the most stubborn person he will ever meet in his entire life. Marm appears easy to be convinced, but deep down, she does whatever she wants to do. No one can arrange anything for her if she is not letting them to.
"I don't have any permission to love you." He answers.
"Whose permission? The demon lord that you serve?"
"Permission from people who raise you up."
The answer means more than Marm can understand.
"So is the answer Yes or No?"
"I don't answer."
"Ok." That's already an answer.
Marm leaves her hands out of his. She finds herself unable to control temper. "You want to wipe memories we had together? Fine. But to be fair, you have to remove them in your mind, too. You can't have intimated memories about me without my notice, you really can't keep those memories for yourself."
He looks at Marm, speechless for the moment being. He can't imagine she will request such a condition.
"The cast can be done for both of us at the same time. I read that page together with you." Marm reminds him.
"You really don't want me to have those memories?"
"No."
Looking at Marm's determination and depression, he knows he can't reject the request.
"Give me a minute."
He walks out of the prison cell. The skeleton soldier is still there guarding as per the order.
"Put them on that table." He hands Marm's gun and spear to it. "Later she may find a way to get them, and she may even break the door, just let her do whatever she wants. Get it?"
The skeleton soldier nods with understanding.
"She will also escape from this place, don't stop her and don't report it to me as well as anyone else, even Char."
"Yes, Sir."
"And one final thing, when I come out from this cell later, remind me to go to the arena. Just tell me that I asked everybody to lure Dai and Pop there."
"Yes, Sir. I remember."
"Good. Your speaking is fine. Keep practising."
Hyunkel comes back to the cell where Marm is waiting for him. He walks toward Marm and can't take his eyes away from her, cold-hearted Marm.
"Close your eyes."
"Not necessary." Marm says. "Need to make sure you cast the spell on yourself, too."
"Your weapons are just outside this cell. My soldier will help, you have the Tear of God with you and the exit route is quite obvious. I guess there will be no problem for your escape?"
"Not at all."
"We won't remember that the winged creature is the Tear of God, too, since we knew its identity within this period of time."
"Never mind, I love Gome the same. Is there any possibility I will remember everything later?"
"You read the page together with me... If we do something that are very similar to the lost memories, such as same conversations, same intimated behaviours..."
"Great. I'm sure nothing similar is repeated."
She is so angry. That he can notice.
He looks into her eyes for the last time and casts the spell.
Marm is furious at him, but still wants to look at him, look at the way he conducts the dark magic that she hates the most, look at him when his eyes closed, handsome as usual. But heartless. Gradually, she falls into unconsciousness.
The skeleton soldier sees his General walking out of the cell.
"When did I come here?" He asks.
"The arena, Sir. Go to the arena."
"What?"
"Go to the arena. Dai, Pop..."
"I see." Before leaving the place, he turns to the skeleton, "Tie the girl up."
"Yes, Sir. "
It feels strange. Anyway, in its simple mind, a soldier is just to carry all orders without asking. It still remembers to let the girl get her weapons like what the master demanded. That's it. Seems like there is one more order, but the absent-minded skeleton can't remember.
...
"He released the Tear of God for the girl."
Vearn is reported by Misuto.
"Disappointed, isn't it?"
"Let me take care of him, Vearn sama." Flazzard is eager.
"Get yourself there and stand by. If he defeats Dai, escort him here. If he loses, kill him and destroy the whole Immortal Army. They don't serve me although they are supposed to. Under Hyunkel's leadership within these years, they shift the utmost loyalty to him."
"Understand, Vearn sama."
...
In the arena, he is waiting for Avan students to come. According to the report, both have already entered the Underground Castle. His intention is the same, kill the boys, release the girl when the job is over.
In the prison cell, she is slightly awaked. She has a headache for no reason. It takes a while for Marm to remember what happened. This is the Underground Castle. She was captured here yesterday.
...
Present time being.
Papunika is at its midnight.
More than four years have passed since the day the Immortal Army invaded and destroyed its capital city. Tonight, the kingdom has just celebrated Queen Leona's twentieth birthday. No more ruins and collapses, no more ghost shadows and immortal soldiers, the beautiful land is full of hopes and happiness.
In his house, sensei and friends are having fun time at living hall with drinks and nonstop stories.
Marm and himself goes to bed early. Carrying a baby at the fourth month, Marm can't join the midnight alcohol party downstairs. Tonight, she seems a little different.
"Thinking about the period of time we were in the Underground Castle?" He asks.
"Why do you know?" Marm tangles his hair. After all these years, he is still that good looking, but in an even more manly and mature way. Marm bursts into a smile. "Emmi said she would follow you to hell, didn't she? I can tell her it's not a good idea."
"Marm has already done that and dragged me out of there." He looks at his fiancée with loves and kisses her forehead. "I love you."
"How about Marm of sixteen-year-old? Did you love her?"
"She was my first time."
"I don't believe." Marm shakes her head. "I don't believe it was your first time."
"I meaned it was the first time I fell in love, not any other kind of first time."
"Then who was the first time?"
"So sleepy now..."
"You can't change to another topic..." Marm laughs and stops him from sleeping.
Papunika ends its beautiful day in a peaceful, loving way for most people residing here.
In couples of weeks, winter will arrive the kingdom.
End Chapter 31.
Related Chapters: Goodbye, I Love You (I, II) and Over The Moon