WPW85 – Ruby is drafted for Aperture Science testing. She proceeds to drive GLaDOS mad with her increasingly out-of-the box thought processes getting through the different courses.
Glad to Meet You
The lights along the wall lit up again. "Test Chamber 17." Ruby read aloud. "I wonder how many of them there are… So far, this has been easy!"
"Do not be so full of yourself." A synthetized voice called out. "The next chambers will be exponentially more DEADLY." The electronic voice sunk low, only to crack and buzz at the end of its sentence.
"Uh… Are you okay? You sounded a little bit… not okay at the end there." Ruby spoke with a bit of concern.
"Proceed with the test." The voice responded flatly. "Perhaps this time you will die. And then there will be cake."
"That's okay." Ruby spoke with cheer. "I'm pretty sure this chamber will be as easy as the last one! And I prefer cookies anyway!" The ground whirred to life in front of Ruby in response. Acid oozed out of the ground, the walls turned a dark grey, and the door out of the room was masked by a wall of turrets.
Ruby held up the completed portal gun that was graciously given to her just a few rooms prior. "Hmmm… This room seems like it might be a bit tougher…" She said focusing on the possible exit paths.
"Yes." The voice called out with a smug undertone. "The Aperture Science Sentry Turrets hold *live* ammunition for our *live* test subjects. As a safety precaution, please familiarize yourself with the extra lead in each round as lead poisoning will surely kill you if the impact from the-"
There was an interrupting crash, and the sounds of bullets firing filled the air. The shooting machineguns silenced after only a moment, and the high pitched voices of the turrets took their place. "Hello? Are You Still There? Hello?"
There was another crack in the chamber, followed by more random firing. All of the red lasers locked onto a target, but failed to track it as it suddenly burst into rose petals. The turrets' lasers spun in circles as the grouping of roses began to spin in a circle, only for it to start barreling towards them.
A moment later, Ruby impacted the exit door behind them. "Hi there!" She called out cheerfully. "Bye now!" The turrets turned to face the intruder, but by the time the first bullet struck the door, she was already gone. The gushing sounds of a viscous liquid gurgled from where she had taken off. The air rushed into the turrets, quickly followed by the flood of acidic ooze.
"Owowowowowow!" The turrets called out. Their machineguns fired widely into the air, but the bullets were quickly washed away by the tidal waves of radioactive waste. As they burnt down, so did the exit door behind them.
"Congratulations." GLaDOS spoke flatly. "You have evaporated test chamber 17 along with many of my data scanners. This test has been wasted by-"
"HA!" Ruby laughed from the safety of the test chambers entrance. "This test has been 'Wasted'! That was a good one! Yang would be SO jealous!"
The sounds of static and growling anger filled the air; however, the words spoken by the robotic voice came out just as flat. "The next test chamber will be the conclusion to our test. Please make your way through what remains of test chamber 17 so that the final testing in test chamber 18 may proceed."
"If you say so!" Ruby responded. In a quick burst of petals, she made her way across the room, through the liquefied door, and into the elevator towards her final challenge.
As the elevator behind the exit whirred to life, Ruby took in GLaDOS' choice of words. "Wait, you said this is the last chamber, right?"
"Yes." GLaDOS' voice boomed out. "Testing on the subject 'RUBY ROSE' has been finalized. Test chamber 18 will record important scientific data on the temperature at which a red cloak will be incinerated in the incinerator room. Following this test, your remains will be escorted from the incinerator room and outside of the Aperture Science Testing Facility."
"Awwww…" Ruby groaned. "I was just starting to have fun too…"
The elevator doors opened, and test chamber 18 was revealed. The room itself was flat. About fifty feet separated her from the exit door. However, blocking her path to the exit was the molten floor of the incinerator.
"Please, take your time in completing this test. Ignore the heat radiating from the floor and walls. That is merely an illusion created for the test. They are completely safe to the touch."
Ruby scoffed at that. "Computer Lady, do you really expect me to believe that? Yang and I played the floor is lava all the time as kids!" She aimed the portal gun at a few of the walls and fired, only to realize that the gun failed to open up anything along the walls. "Hey, Computer Lady, what gives? I thought this gun of yours was supposed to be okay in the heat!"
"The Aperture Science Portal Device is operating correctly. The Aperture Science Portal Device will not open a portal on non-lunar rock surfaces." There was a small laugh from the synthetic voice. "The Aperture Science Portal Device will withstand heat from the incinerator room, however, organic material will not."
Ruby desperately looked across the room. After all the other chambers, surely there must be a way out. She couldn't touch the walls, ceiling, or the floor, but had to travel nearly fifty feet… If that didn't kill her, the heat coming off of each of them would!
The voice laughed again. "Goodbye, Ruby Rose. Thank you for completing the Aperture Science Testing Program. Your data will provide results for the future-"
Gunfire cut off GLaDOS' speech. Ruby flew across the room, arching over the floor at a ridiculous speed. The exit door opened, and then closed behind her as she landed gracefully by the chambers exit elevators.
"Whew!" Ruby called out. "It was really hot in there! I have to admit, without those modifications those to this thing…" She hefted up the portal gun with the guns of a broken turret molded to it. "I might not have made it!"
A screeching noise immediately echoed from behind the elevator doors as a pod came to a halt. The door flung open in front of Ruby, and the voice spoke aloud. "Get out." The tone was flat, but no less venomous than the last 17 chambers.
"Awww… Can I at least keep one of the cute heart cube things?" There was a rumbling as a companion cube rocketed into the room and into the elevator next to Ruby. "Yay! Zwei Cube made it!"
There was an electronic groan and the elevator doors slammed around Ruby. "Just. Go."
Author's Notes
Hello everyone!
I know I keep getting longer between uploading stories, but I have a good excuse! In just over 3 weeks, I'm going to be getting married! Planning for it has been eating at my day to day schedule more than I would have thought, and on top of that I'm moving into a new place over the next few weeks as well! So I apologize if I disappear for awhile, but just know that I'm not abandoning FF!
As always, I hope you enjoyed! I have three more stories that I would like to upload over the next few days, but even if you don't see anything then, they will be coming eventually!
Thank you for reading!
~Sh1f7er