OBJECTIVES
#34: BLOCK OFF ANY OTHER ENTRANCES IN OFFICE.
OYMYAKON MILITARY BASE
5: 32 A.M
TIME SKIP – ONE DAY
Emma walked silently down the large halls. She had sent a notification to Sideswipe and Sunstreaker the previous evening, stating that they meet her in the rec room. It would be totally absent at this time in the morning, hence giving enough time for them to go over the statistics. The human child had downloaded a software which would go over the footage taken of the Pranks and produce a winner.
She hadn't tampered with it to suit her own needs. Emma wasn't that evil. No, this wasn't even her work. It had been the internet's work.
She had simply taken it and modified it to suit vide tapes of hilarious – and dangerous – pranks, which humiliate the chosen Autobots.
Checking to make sure the next corner was clear, the dark haired organic started running to her destination. She was two minutes late, and Sunstreaker could get very… temperamental.
Especially in the morning.
Not a nice thing to put up with.
The large open doors to her destination loomed in front of her, and she sighed, while drawing in gasps of air. She was not very fit.
The two Autobots could hear her panting from two miles away. They sent her looks as the small organic came stumbling in. Emma bent over and held up her hand, to signal that they wait.
After five minutes, the human straightened, and met the disapproving optics of her fellow prankers. They were not amused.
The Asian American shrugged, and held out her computer. Setting it down on the large table in front of the TV, she turned it on. The two Bots leaned in closer and trained their optics on the small screen, so as to see the video and results.
Emma inserted the flash drive into the computer, and several video files were accessed. The first was labeled: SIDESWIPE.
The three watched in silence at the footage. Sunstreaker's optics widened minutely as he realised that the SIC had been in his office. Just on the ceiling.
'How were you able to get Wheeljack to create that anti-gravity device?' The human asked. The red twin didn't elaborate, simply opting for watching the genius of his Pranks.
After going through all of that, the twelve year old downloaded it into a separate file, one that began scanning it over.
The next footage was labeled: EMMA AHN LE
'You guys didn't have last names, so it was just the first.' She spoke to them as the video played.
Sideswipe blinked, 'You made Ironhide go out in front of all those people while he was still pink?'
'Yep. Humiliation is the best.' She smiled evilly. The front liner shrugged, accepting that.
The last consisted of Sunstreaker's events. I think you know what it was labeled.
'You labeled me "Psychotic guy who can't take a joke"?!' The gold twin demanded. Emma smirked.
'And I was right.' She pressed play.
They watched, once again mute, until they got to Ratchet's prank. The trashed med bay stared back at them, and they saw Jolt and Michaela standing in the doorway, speaking between them. There was no sound, but both beings looked pit scared.
'My god! You sentenced them to their deaths!' The human exclaimed. Sunstreaker looked on icily.
'No I didn't. I sentenced you two to your deaths. Once I win. Besides, Jolt and Michaela aren't dead.' He reassured them. It took more than that.
'Well where are they then? I haven't seen them for the whole time since you did that!' Sideswipe intoned. His brother shrugged.
'I think they're in Petrograd somewhere.'
Silence…
'Okay… downloading.' The last file was placed in the designated file. It would take a few minutes, and the two others turned to the gold warrior, 'And what makes you so sure that you're gonna win?' Emma demanded. He smirked.
'Because my pranks were so elaborate.'
Sideswipe scoffed, 'Elaborate my aft. You aren't going to win. I am. So both of ya better be ready to spend the rest of your life in the brig.'
'As if! I got the most reaction out of Prowl, and sent Ratchet on a killing spree. I publicly humiliated Ironhide without moving from my spot on the floor.' The human retorted.
'Big deal. We've done way better than you ever have!' Both front liners agreed on that. She huffed.
'I'll win in a landslide.' A blip drew their attention to the screen, and they saw that the information had been downloaded. Now it was processing the footage.
Processing…
Processing…
Processing…
And the winner is….
'NO!' Two equally loud shouts reverberated around the base, filled with despair. Nearly everybody was up at that point, and all three scattered in a panic.
Blurr immediately shot up and ran into the wall. Then his attention was on Melissa to see if she was having another mental attack. Nope. But the human did look ticked off at the early wake up call.
'Damn it! You try sleep once in this god forsaken place, and see what you get!' She shouted. Then both looked towards where their charge was supposed to be. Emma was missing.
They looked at each other. Should they go look?
… Nah.
It was too much effort.
The child didn't know about Blurr and Melissa's engagement. And for good reason. The kid had a larger mouth than… well… one of the Bots. No offense to them or anything.
Eliza shot awake at the shouts. She was still stuck in the med bay, but luckily was getting out when the infirmary reopened. She had spent all of yesterday on a computer she borrowed from Natalie, under the strict instruction not to go through any personal files. She had agreed.
Instead, the human had spent all day looking up what the term "Mary Sue" meant. Her reaction had been just this.
'What the hell?! Why are there so many descriptions for these? One is discouraging you from writing about it; the other is saying that people don't bother creating OC's for the simple purpose they'll be judged. So instead they go write slash? Why is this so confusing?' Of course, this had been on urban dictionary, so it was going to be confusing. Her next reaction had been surprise, 'Why do I care? Why am I even looking at this in the first place?'
She was counting down the minutes – subconsciously, because until then, she had been asleep – until that six o'clock trumpet sounded. And the medical people would get in here and release her. Why they kept her in here for so long, confused her.
It would be good to get back to work with Prowl. She needed an update on what had happened in the days she had been here. The alarm had sounded for a Decepticon attack, but apparently it was a bust.
Actually, a lot of screwed up things had happened in the last three days. She swore that she heard Ratchet cursing to high heaven at one point. And then Ironhide shouting in Cybertronian at another.
Why was this place so… weird?
Well, weird being relative to what normal could be considered. And to them, this was normal. That's sad.
She wondered how her Praxian friend was doing. When Agent Silverman had come in to remove him from this ward, he hadn't seemed too happy.
Of course, he could've simply been tired. She knew that he hardly ever recharged or refueled. And now she kind of felt bad for allowing him to do that so regularly.
Yeah, she wasn't very good at helping people out of the general public.
Natalie woke up and banged her head on the metal above her, 'OW! Damn it!' She whisper shouted. The red head had spent the whole night in the vent above Prowl's room. Today was the day that they were heading over to Spain. How the SIC had gained permission from his commander to be absent again, was a mystery to her. She supposed that he had a lot of favors.
Either way, the Bot had just gotten back from being stuck in the med bay, along with Jazz. The amount of water that had been in this room had seeped into their internal mechanisms and had temporarily off-lined them. It had not been a pleasant experience.
The mech had returned barely a few hours earlier, and had immediately begun working. He had sensed her the minute he had walked in, but didn't bother calling her on it. Why bother? She wasn't gonna move until it was time for them to leave. Which would be at ten past six.
Just thirty more minutes.
He worked in silence till then. The reports had piled up since the incident, and several of his datapads were no longer functional.
But then – as if the universe were laughing at him – she had to start sneezing. And not one of those short and clipped ones. Full out emphasized shouts.
He groaned internally. What was wrong with this woman? They only had fifteen minutes to go, and only now does she decide to make her presence known – even if it had been known before.
The next time he gets stuck with her on a mission, he was making sure that she was tied down to a post in her own room. Un-sub-spacing his frequently used datapad – which he had luckily kept in his subspace compartment before he was attached to a ceiling and then submerged in water. He was going to find the beings that did this and kill them – and began typing. The sneezing had finally stopped though.
OBJECTIVES
#1: ATTEND ALL FUTURE MEETINGS WITH OPTIMUS PRIME.
#2: AVOID RATCHET BY ALL COSTS. - FAILED
#3: REFRAIN FROM ALLOWING BLIND SIGHTED ANGER TO CLOUD JUDGEMENT. CONSEQUENCES MAY BE DIRE. - FAILED
#4: BE AWAKE FOR MORNING REPORTS. NECESSITY – TOP.
#5: DO NOT LISTEN TO THE NEW RECRUIT (ELIZA JOVER) - FAILED
#6: AVOID TWINS BY ANY MEANS NECESSARY UNLESS PUNISHING THEM.
#7: HAVE ELIZA RECORD ALL FUTURE INTERACTIONS BETWEEN HER AND OTHER AUTOBOTS.
#8: EDUCATE ELIZA IN CYBERTRONIAN HISTORY.
#9: KEEP CONTROL OVER EMOTIONS
#10: REMAIN FOCUSED ON DUTIES. SOCIAL INTERACTIONS LIMITED TO MEETINGS. - FAILED
#11: AS THE HUMANS SAY, DO NOT GET YOUR HOPES UP. DOING SO WILL JUST LEAD TO DISAPPOINTMENT AND IT IS ILLOGICAL TO BELIEVE THAT ANYTHING WILL CHANGE.
#12: WHEN IT COMES TO HUMANS, FEW HAVE THE CAPACITY TO REMAIN QUIET.
#13: NEVER LET HER GO.
#14: NEVER LEAVE WITHOUT THAT DATAPAD
#15: LEARN MORE ABOUT ELIZA JOVER.
#16: DO NOT LET ELIZA NEAR ANY GAMBLING LOCATIONS.
#17: PROTECT ELIZA TILL DEATH.
#18: THERE IS ALWAYS HOPE. NEVER STOP HOPING.
#19: ALWAYS KEEP NUMEROUS WEAPONS IN SUBSPACE.
#20: NEVER ALLOW ELIZA NEAR ALCOHOL.
#21: KEEP ANY AND ALL OTHER PAST EXPERIENCES QUIET.
#22: DO NOT MAKE ASSUMPTIONS UNTIL ALL FACTS HAVE BEEN DISPLAYED.
#23: WHEN SEEKING REVENGE, EMPLOY A MORE TACTICAL PLAN.
#24: ALWAYS SPECIFY YOUR INTENTIONS, ESPECIALLY TO THE HUMAN WHO SUPPLIED YOU WITH THREE THOUSAND AMERICAN DOLLARS.
#25: DON'T LISTEN TO YURI AS THAT WILL LIKELY LAND YOU IN A DIFFERENT COUNTRY TRACKING DOWN DANGEROUS PEOPLE ON THE WORD OF AN ESTRANGED WOMAN.
#26: EXPERIENCE.
#27: REMEMBER THAT HUMANS ARE NEVER GOOD IN SITUATIONS THAT PRESENT THEMSELVES WITH MORE POWER THAN THEIR OWN.
#28: REFRAIN FROM BRINGING ELIZA INTO MEETINGS.
#29: THE ACT OF DISCLOSURE IS NOT ONE THAT SHOULD BE REPEATED.
#30: PUNCHING A HOLE IN THE WALL IS NOT A GOOD WAY TO RELEASE ANGER. DO NOT ATTEMPT THAT IN THE FURTHER FUTURE.
#31: HUMANS HAVE VERY SHORT ATTENTION SPANS. DO NOT GET TOO IRRITATED WITH THEM, AS IT IS JUST THEIR NATURE.
#32: NO MATTER HOW MUCH SHE ANNOYS YOU, DO NOT POINT YOUR ACID PELLET RIFFLE AT NATALIA. DOING SO HELPS NOTHING, AND RESULTS IN PROCESSOR ACHES, AND THE INABILITY TO MOVE
#33: CHANGE OFFICE PASSWORD CONTINUOUSLY. USE PI.
#34: BLOCK OFF ANY OTHER ENTRANCES IN OFFICE.
It simply seemed easier than catching her. And this way, nobody would get in, and he could have peace. Something he had been longing for since the start of this wretched war. That and a way back to Cybertron.
Hopefully though, the second part may be provided today, or the following days. And then, the preferred latter may be accomplished.
Not that he wouldn't miss a few things on this planet…
Maybe Eliza could come with.
He scratched that thought instantly. For one, it would be to dangerous for an organic, and secondly, the reaction that would come from the Cybertronian recruits could vary from interest to fear.
He placed most odds on fear.
As the clock – well, his chronological gage – ticked closer to the leaving time, Natalia eventually showed herself. Neither made conversation, simply opting for focusing on something else.
Their attention was drawn by the sound of the office door being open. Somehow, both of them had missed the trumpet sounding. It was that, or nobody bothered with the trumpet anymore, as it usually got stuck to the person's lips. And stayed there until the freezing metal had gone back to room temperature.
Eliza stood in the doorway, and Prowl nearly smiled. He hadn't seen her in a while, and she was looking as radiant as before. Minus the fact that her hair was a tangled mess and she hadn't showered in five days. Ah, her imperfections were perfect.
Natalie sighed, just wanting to make fun of the Praxian, but didn't dare at the moment. It was gonna be a real long trip, and she did not want the cold shoulder from him. As an after note, neither of the females knew that he could no longer speak English.
Agent Jover nodded to her superior, and then to her companion, 'Mam. Hey Prowl. Long time no see.'
The Bot didn't know her language anymore, which meant he no longer understood her, so he just remained quiet, and nodded as well.
The two humans regarded one another for a moment, before Eliza held out a laptop. How they get these things, or how they are allowed to bring them on base, is something that only crazy, half baked authority people allow.
'Brought back your computer. So, why are you here so early?' She asked, as Natalie jumped down and took it away from her.
'Eh, Prowl and I are heading off to Spain for a few days. Gibraltar. We have a few things that need to be taken care of.' The red head explained.
'Oh? What kind of things?' A look was sent to her colleague, who had gone back to working.
'Uh… that's classified. It's between us and a… friend.' Very elusive.
Eliza scowled, fed up, 'You two have kept secrets from me ever since Prague. I want in on this.'
The SIC still did not look up, but Natalie's eyes narrowed, 'This is secret for a very good reason. The less people know the better. You will stay out of it for your own safety, as well as the safety of this base.'
The brunette's scowl deepened, and she turned sharp eyes on the Cybertronian in the room, 'Well Prowl? Are you gonna simply accept that? Because you owe me enough to at least give me some insight as to why you're always running off with her!' Eliza was shocked by her own words. She was… jealous. That was it. She was jealous. Jealous of her superior because she was spending so much time with her friend. With her colleague. Natalie hadn't done anything to deserve his attention. She had. She put up with his stoic personality. In fact, she enjoyed it. She worked with him.
The Praxian looked up at her outburst and sighed, knowing that she was speaking to him, 'Элиза, я сожалею, но я не знаю, о чем вы говорите. Я больше не имеют способности к восприятию или говорить на английском языке.' – Eliza, I'm sorry, but I do not know what you're talking about. I no longer have the ability to comprehend or speak English.
The two females blinked at what he said, 'Uh… what?' Natalia asked. He released a weary vent and just went back to his work.
'I… I don't think that's English.' Eliza stated. The red head sighed.
'Of course not! It's Russian. Question is why he's speaking Russian?' They puzzled over that for several minutes, while Prowl worked on a datapad, while simultaneously sending them wary glances. It should not be this hard for them to try understand. Then he remembered that humans didn't have a logic processor. They just had ten percent of their minds.
It was really pathetic.
He checked his chronological gage. It was the designated departure time. Now how did he tell them that without confusing them even more than before?
Truthfully he was not in the mood for accommodating the needs of others, so he just got up, sub-spaced several items and went to exit the room.
He'd let them find out in a minute. Depending on if they even realised that he left.
OYMYAKON MILITARY BASE
6: 17 A.M
'Hey, is she even coming?' The pilot asked. Prowl sighed at his relentless questions. At least he thought they were questions. He couldn't tell, and didn't bother to reply.
But the man didn't let up, 'Hey! Yo! I'm talking to you! When's she coming?' His optic threatened to twitch at the human's loud tone, but he remained impassive.
'Look, you're either gonna tell me, or you aint getting a ride.' The male threatened. The Praxian couldn't understand him, but he replied this time.
'Сэр, я не знаю, что вы говорите, но, пожалуйста, сохраняйте спокойствие, пока мой спутник не прибывает.' – Sir, I do not know what you are saying, but please remain calm until my companion arrives.
The pilot blinked at the incomprehensible language that came from the SIC. Nonetheless, it shut him up.
Ten minutes later, Natalie came running into the hangar, 'Finally.' The man muttered, then boarded the plane.
The female gasped after running, 'Sorry… for being late… had an argument… with… Eliza. Huh! Made sure that she won't… be coming with us.'
Prowl was just fed up, so he opted for simply nodding. It was easier than trying to comprehend what she was saying. Or trying to explain that he couldn't understand her.
Meanwhile…
The three pranksters stood outside, far away from any cameras. There was a tense silence between them, as the two who had lost waited for the third's decision on what they were to do for that being. As per the agreement.
After a long moment, the victor spoke, 'Alright. Other than for the obvious fact that you two have to turn yourselves in, this is what I request.'
There was a long pause, where the losers shifted uncomfortably. The winner smiled evilly, 'First off, I don't want to see either of you for a whole two months after you get out. The second,' Sunstreaker waited again, feeling very triumphant. He had won, and it had been grand, 'For whenever you guys get out, I don't want to be drawn into anymore pranks for a long time. And you won't try to foist blame on me whenever you do something stupid.'
Sideswipe and Emma groaned at the requests. Neither of them saw this coming. They didn't expect him to win. In fact, he was probably the least likely Bot to win this between them all. But apparently, the program decided he won, and they could do nothing about that.
The gold twin thought for a moment before adding something else, 'You are also no longer allowed to call me Sunny, Sunshine, Sunflower or anything that is not my real name.'
Sideswipe frowned, 'Oh, you've gotta be joking. Fine, take away any humor that my life had.'
'That's the point. I want you to suffer.' He grinned and then waved them away, while he himself strode back to the complex, 'I'll come visit you two while you're in the brig!' He called back.
Emma sighed, 'Great. We lost. And we were the ones who came up with this.' She turned towards her partner in crime, 'At least his demands weren't too brutal. I was gonna have you guys spray paint yourselves and then walk around while I took photos and pinned them up around the base.' Ah, public humility.
Sideswipe nodded, equally unhappy, 'Yeah. And I was gonna use you and sunny as target practice then make you and him stand outside all day till you eventually off-lined. Not by death, more unconscious, but it would have been fun.'
They both considered what they had said, 'You know what?' The human eventually spoke up, 'I am so glad that Sunstreaker won.'
'Me to.'
They both waited in silence for a few moments longer.
There were icicles on the trees that surrounded them.
A plane took off.
There was a slight breeze.
'Look we can't put this off any longer, lets just go fess up and spend the rest of our waking years in the brig.' Emma stated. Sideswipe nodded reluctantly, and he bent down so that she could step in his outstretched servo. She did so, and they sat off back towards the cement buildings.
Melissa stood beside her Sparkmates side as they watched Eliza pace back and forth in front of them. The brunette was evidently troubled by something. She just simply wouldn't elaborate on it. And they didn't have much time at the moment.
The blonde sighed, 'Eliza, I have got twenty minutes until I'm on monitor duty. Can we just get his over with?'
'He's gone to Spain with her!' The pacing femme's outburst startled them, 'I mean he didn't even tell me what it was about! All he did was start speaking in Russian!'
'Oh Primus.' Blurr groaned, and that got Agent Jover's attention.
'What is it?' She demanded.
'Well-when-Prowl-arrived-on-Diego-Garcia-he-was-speaking-fluent-Russian. Same-goes-for-Sideswipe-but-he-was-speaking-Portuguese. It-took-them-four-weeks-to-learn-English.' The intelligence officer relayed for her.
She blinked, 'Oh… that still doesn't give him the right to just leave though! And why is he going with her? She has no connection with him at all. They're basically strangers! They have nothing in common. They, they… don't deserve to be… working… together!' She was really blowing this out of proportion.
She began pacing again and Melissa sighed and checked the time. This was cutting it way to close. She looked up at Blurr, 'Lets say to reschedule this for tomorrow?'
He sighed, 'Agreed.' Bending down, she stepped on his servo and he brought her to the monitor room for her shift.
'Well, hoping that I don't kill myself from boredom, I shall see you back at the room tonight.' She waved him goodbye, and watched briefly as his form was replaced by air. She sighed. Thank you Eliza. The day they plan to have their semi-wedding and she had to go and believe that her work colleague was having an affair with some girl.
This is what life is like for anybody who is affiliated with giant alien robots. Eventually, your thoughts just slur together, until everybody on the outside world decides you need to be put in a mental asylum and kept there.
PLEASE REVIEW
Well it was a faster update than lat time I must admit. Anyway, I want to thank the brilliant people who reviewed last time:
Booknchoc
Neon (2) – Loved the Soundwave thing!
And anyone else who has previously reviewed, or favourite/ followed the Fanfic. Please review!