I'm sorry for taking so long to update again, but I've finally finished this story. There will be one more chapter after this one. I have written it and will post it in a couple of days. Thank you for all your reviews, please tell me what you think about this…

/Mli

Chapter 36

Piper was tapping her knuckles against the coffee table, a nervous habit. She was sitting at a coffee shop close to the precinct, waiting for Alex. 'They are taking forever… please let her survive this…I don't think she could take it if she doesn't get to the bottom of this…'

She didn't have to wait much longer; she suddenly heard her voice being called out. She looked up only to find a teary looking Alex walking towards her.

"Piper…" Piper rose from her seat and went to meet Alex who came up and pulled the blonde into a bone crushing hug.

"It's done. It's over…" Alex managed to get out between sobs. Piper just held on her, her fingers threading trough the raven locks belonging to the woman in her arms.

After a while the sobs subsided and Alex managed to pull herself together. Piper took her hand and pulled her down onto the sofa in the corner where she had been sitting.

"Tell me what happened" Piper asked gently.

During Alex's whole story Piper continuously kept stroking her hand, never letting it go. She gasped when Alex finally told her that it was in fact the little brother who had shot her… and Shawn never pulled the trigger… he just took the gun which had started this whole mess. It didn't make it better to know that she'd been shot by the kid, the same kid she'd shot and killed, but finally she knew the truth. It was over. Alex spaced out for a couple of minutes, absorbing it all again. Piper was trying hard to let her be. Suddenly Alex spoke up again.

"Caputo is reinstating me… he wants me to come back to work." She wore an unreadable expression and Piper wondered if she was happy about the news or not. Piper didn't know what to say, did this mean that Alex would stay in New York? What would happen to them? Did she still want to be with her? Her head was spinning.

Alex saw the turbulence in the blonde's eyes and placed her palm on the other woman's cheek.

"Hey, Hey….stop." She looked at Piper knowingly.

"I don't know. Ok. I don't know if I want this life anymore, here in the City, I mean… A couple of months ago it was all I wanted, it was all I knew. But now….meeting you has changed me. You have changed me. And I don't know if I can go back; or if I even want to…" Alex pleaded with her eyes, trying to make Piper see that she was lost, and needed… she didn't really know what she needed right now. Piper got the message and closed her eyes for a second before opening them, showing resolve.

"Let's go home, you need to rest, and I need to hold you. Ok? Let's go".

That was exactly what Alex needed… 'How does she do that, see right through me….?'

The next day, a well-rested Alex went back to the precinct to make her final statement and after that she talked some more to Caputo.

Sitting in his office she tried to figure out what she wanted to do. She pulled off her glasses and put them on top of her head.

"Look, Joe, I'm really confused right now, you know that this is all I ever wanted to do… but this last year has changed me. And I don't know if this is enough anymore." Alex shook her head in looked at Caputo.

"I get it Vause, ok, here's what we'll do." He leaned forward, placing his elbows on his desk. "Take a few days, think it over, talk to Nicky, and get back to me. What do ya say? I want you to come back, you know I do, but it's up to you."

Alex left the office feeling even more confused. She decided to walk home, giving her time to clear her head.

Why was this so hard? Obviously she should go back with Piper. She loved her and couldn't imagine her life without her now. No way. But what would she do, she couldn't continue working as Piper's secretary anymore, the old one, Rose, would be back next month so she'd be out of a job and even though Piper said that she's making enough for the both of them she could live like that. She needed to be useful. She needed to do something she believed in. And being a part of the NYPD had meant the world to her, and her father. Could she really give all that up? A fantasy that had been bouncing around in the back of her head came rushing back…. Maybe they could start a family? If Piper was working she could carry and give birth to their future children… and be a housewife? Was that really who she was? A Housewife? Could she?

Alex suddenly found herself outside of Nicky's apartment. Piper was inside, and the most grown-up thing to do would be going up there and talk about her fears and thoughts… right? Piper always had a way of calming her down; she really should go up there.

Five hours later, Alex stumbled through the door to Nicky's apartment. Where a furiously agitated blonde beauty was currently throwing a fit, her cellphone glued to her right hand, her hair all disheveled after dragging her fingers through it over and over again… probably leaving the 37th message on Alex's phone, which she had turned off after the 11th.

Piper, being caught off guard when Alex suddenly appeared, stalked up to the drunken excuse of a woman, took a deep breath and started yelling.

"Where have you been, I've been going crazy sitting here waiting for you…. You texted me five hours ago, FIVE! And told me you'd be home in 20 minutes…" Tears started streaming down her cheeks and her legs started to give out in sheer exhaustion after worrying for so long. A little softer she tried again "I was so worried… I thought something had happened…after all this is New York… you could have been shot for all I knew… Alex!"

Alex was drunk out of her mind, having gone to the bar she and her father used to celebrate all big occasions at. Getting her reputation cleared and reinstated surely counted as a big occasion? But the noise coming for the tall blonde in front of her was deafening.

"I needed… I don't know… a drink…and I went to a bar, where dad used to take me…. And I forgot about the time… I'm sorry…" Alex tried. She hadn't forgotten about the time, she just needed more of it.

"You turned your phone off… why, Alex? Why can't you talk to me?" Piper pleaded.

"You know what" The blonde suddenly said abruptly. "We shouldn't talk about this right now, you're obviously drunk and sad…and I'm sad… we'd probably say stuff we don't mean. Let's just go to sleep. We'll talk tomorrow…" Alex, even in her drunken haze, could hear the resignation in Pipers voice. She let herself be lead to the guest bedroom by the blonde. When the lights were all turned off she reached out and hugged Piper to her, whispering "I love you…" into her ear.

Alex was awakened by a phone ringing, but she was soon sound asleep again.

The next time she woke it was Piper's voice who tried to lure her from her sleeping state.

"Alex… Alex…" Alex squinted her eyes, trying to open them, even though it hurt like hell. The ramification of last night's drunken escapades hitting her full on.

She finally opened her eyes and saw a stressed blonde sitting at her side, looking intently at her. Her brain catching on, maybe something had happened that caused Piper to look so distressed. Alex sat up and shook her head, instantly regretting it but at least she was awake now. She reached out for Piper's hand. And she was relieved when the blonde didn't pull away from her.

"What's going on Pipes, you're scaring me…" She searched for Piper's eyes but the blonde ducked her head.

"I have to go… hmm, I have to go back home" The blonde still had her eyes glued to the bed they were sitting in.

So, the next and final chapter will be up in a couple of days. Please review!