A/N: Okay, I know I'm totally lame for such a late update and I can only apologize again. First I was sidetracked by the idea that prompted the Fae Beer Bad fic and then the Olympics happened and now it's a new job that's screwing with my sleeping schedule. Anyway, I just wanted to thank those who are still bothering to read this story.
Part of the blame should be on the chapter itself, as well. It just wouldn't quit. Bo and Lauren just kept stealing the story from me and the plot (there's lots of Doccubus dialogue so that's kinda a bonus for you guys as a sorta bribe for the long wait).
Last thing: this is unbeta'ed again and I mean super unbeta'ed. I just knew that if I stopped to edit it, I wouldn't be able to post it tonight and maybe the next few nights so I just posted it now, regardless of errors so please be patient.
Anyway, on with the show. Enjoy!
48
Lauren was busy; perhaps busier than she'd ever been this whole year, including the day of the compound's bombing. After that brief moment with Bo before the succubus ran off to find Kenzi, Lauren barely found time to herself.
First, she had to make sure that Lachlan's body was taken care of, and then she had to coordinate with Serena as the first of their many wounded came back from the fight.
The ifrit had sent over forty soldiers to the Garuda's lair as Bo's backup and almost one-third never made it out of there alive. The rest were a broken mess and it had been a pitiful and heartbreaking sight to see them limp back to the compound. Even with her professionalism, Lauren had been shaken to see the results of the battle in the form of the wounded. She was a doctor, yes and she was familiar with most diseases known to man and fae, and she never really flinched anymore at the presence of bloody guts and pus-filled gore. When she was a mere intern, she had seen her share of trauma-filled wards - victims of accidents and violence.
But Lauren had also quickly realized that war brought out a different set of casualties. It was one thing to see a fae kill, or a bunch of mangled bodies after a car crash - it was another thing altogether to see so many fall because of a senseless war and see the marks of brutality on the men's bodies and figure out that their opponents had enjoyed unleashing their chaotic destruction. Lauren couldn't help but notice and feel for those under her care: the dazed look in their eyes as they realized that somehow they had survived an encounter with a Garuda and then the pained and guilty aftertaste as they remember their friends who didn't.
The only good news that Lauren had held on to amidst the choking atmosphere of defeat was that the suggested modifications for their armor seemed to have worked. They weren't sure yet how effective the armor was beyond the small comments from the coherent soldiers but it had been a nice feeling to have managed at least one thing right.
When Lauren had theorized that the Garuda was sending telepathic waves of influence to trigger fear and aggression, she had also suggested that perhaps a helmet could be modified to send out subliminal sound waves to "disrupt the signal" from the Garuda. The tech department had been all over her idea, improving the concept to better protect their troops. Meanwhile, the magic department had also suggested carving runic symbols of protection and confidence on the body armor as extra precaution.
Lauren had spent hours and hours bent down, saving all she could and trying even with those she knew was beyond her reach. Unfortunately for her, since the compound was the base headquarters, everyone knew to return there first. Her staff then had to triage the wounded and those able to travel had been sent to smaller, nearby fae clinics. She had been left with the serious, need-to-be-seen-asap cases and even with a great team with her, Lauren had lost a fair number of patients.
But even afterwards, when the last patient was tended to and made comfortable, she hadn't allowed herself to rest yet. Lauren went back to her rooms and felt too weary and soul sick after all she had dealt with that day that she was determined to bury those feelings by working on the venom again. If she could determine, once and for all, how to stabilize the coagulation process then all their sacrifices wouldn't have been in vain.
In the morning though, she only found herself passed out on her desk with an aching, stiff neck, nowhere near enough to solving the puzzle, and rudely woken by the phone with a gruff voice on the other end summoning her to attend a meeting in an hour.
Lauren had tumbled into the shower and then downed two cups of coffee before she felt marginally human again and ready to face the challenges of the new day.
xxx
The meeting was grim, as Lauren had already expected, but it also held a touch of bitterly amused irony that she wasn't sure she completely approved of. Everyone had come in conscious of yet another loss of an Ash and one diplomat had joked about getting used to it, and that at least the high Elders were intact this time, in an effort to break the gloomy atmosphere.
Most of the people in the room had found themselves snickering slightly in reaction. Lauren knew that part of it was a form of coping with the recent tragedy but the other part was the sheer ridiculousness of it all. Two Ashes to be replaced in less than a year. The former Ash had ruled for centuries and now, Lachlan hadn't even lasted a year of his own.
Briefly, Lauren's thoughts turned to the former Ash and she wondered about her condition. She idly wondered if there was a chance he could come back and become Ash again but she dismissed it and concentrated on the meeting.
The first order of business was the soldiers' report on the battle. It was a straightforward account and they have more or less predicted the same outcome. The one thing it did confirm was the result of the armor modifications and everyone agreed that it helped control their emotions. The soldiers reported feeling either slightly aggravated or more fearful beyond that of battle-tension but they also felt that it wasn't as bad as it could have been without the added protection.
They couldn't really be sure because no one could test the equipment properly but it did give the others hope that they could defeat the Garuda. Of course, the Garuda had also left the battle after the first ten minutes or so to kill the Ash, Lauren thought, but she didn't share that bitter observation.
Next order of business was the planned evacuation of the Elders. For the most part, it was already underway and there were no problems so far. There were also reports that many other fae had begun to leave the city and it brought up an interesting question, do they stay as well or do they leave with the others?
It sparked a semi-debate about the merits of hiding in safety until the worst of it passed and the value of protecting their homes.
"We have been here for centuries, long before humans came to claim this land!" one person argued fiercely. "I am not just going to leave it like a coward!"
"Are you calling me a coward?! I have fought in the war when you were but a youngling!"
"And yet you would hide from the Garuda now?"
"It is not because I want to! It is because he is no foe I, no we, have ever faced before! And we have already suffered a defeat while he grows stronger!"
Lauren wanted to interrupt both and tell them that Bo was still here and that she could, no would, lead them to victory but she held her tongue instead.
The debate ended when Jeremy Volpe got tired of the circular sniping and put a stop to it. "We aren't leaving. Yet. There are things we must accomplish first and we are not yet beaten." He glared at the others, who had good grace to look ashamed at giving up so soon. "We can decide later what to do but for now there are still a few matters of interest we must discuss."
Marcus Chase cleared his throat and spoke up. "Yes, there is still the matter of the dead." At this pronunciation, everyone became quiet and solemn. "This last matter may seem frivolous to you now, considering the times we face," Chase continued, "but we must honour their sacrifices nevertheless." He nodded to Serena who held a list in her hands.
"This is by no means the complete list of the dead," Serena said, "because we cannot fully know how many have fallen because of the Garuda's influence."
Lauren thought of the bodies that she had been studying for months now, the cases that Lachlan had brought to her attention.
"But I have here at least the names of the soldiers that have fallen in battle yesterday," Serena continued. "Their families are on their way to claim them but the office of the Ash should send a representative to their funerals as well to show our support."
Everyone murmured their agreement and Lauren nodded to show hers. But Serena still wasn't finished and she said, "There is one name here though, a body we have retrieved from the Garuda's lair that was not part of my troops."
For a moment Lauren panicked, thinking that it must be Kenzi. She only belatedly realized that Bo hadn't called her yesterday and what if the girl was dead and what would happen to Bo then...
"The fairy warrior, Ciara O'Brien. She had been part of the succubus group," Serena finished, unknowingly stilling Lauren's fears.
Lauren breathed a sigh of relief and she was quick to suggest giving the body to Ciara's friends. As the meeting wound down, she let her mind drift off back to Bo. She had half-forgotten that they had declared their love for each other two days ago. It seemed like such a long time already and felt like a dream. Lauren knew that she should contact the succubus but part of her was reluctant, not sure if it was appropriate with all that they were facing right now.
(After the meeting, when Lauren had returned to her rooms, she would feel slightly guilty at realizing that she hadn't even thought of Dyson's welfare and if he could have been the name on Serena's list.)
xxx
Two days later, Trick held Ciara's funeral at the Dal, the same time that Lachlan's funeral was held at the compound. Lauren had passed by the hall where they had set up the funeral altar but she decided to stop by the Dal first, eager to see Bo.
She had only been able to talk to the succubus by phone the past few days and while Lauren was relieved that Bo was okay, she still wanted to see her. She felt slightly silly that she was missing the other woman badly and when she got to the Dal, she began to worry about how she would conduct herself. Was it okay to kiss her in front of their friends or would she have to make do with a hug?
All her worries were for naught though, when she saw the succubus. Bo greeted her freely with a smile and a kiss that made Kenzi's eyebrows pop up and Hale to smirk.
"Bout damn time," Hale said. "Hello, Doc."
"Hello Hale, Trick. Hey, Kenzi," Lauren nodded, not moving away from Bo's loose embrace.
"Bo-bo, how come you didn't say anything about this," Kenzi motioned with her hand, "happening? Hey, Lauren!"
Bo shrugged and looked at Lauren again, "I forgot?"
"You forgot?!" and then Kenzi sighed and said, "Never mind, not the time and place. But be sure that there will be questions later. Maybe an inquisition too," she added, using two fingers to point to her eyes and back to Bo.
They made their way at the front of Ciara's funeral altar and gazed solemnly at her picture. Lauren couldn't help but notice that despite the serious atmosphere in the room, it was also tinged with a lightheartedness that seemed incongruous in a funeral. But then she remembered that the fae mourned differently because of their long lives; death wasn't a tragedy but a release. They mourned but they also made sure to celebrate the dead fae's life to honor them properly.
"She saved my life Trick," Bo started. "Jumped in front of a Garuda's sword like it was nothing."
Lauren hadn't known about that and she felt grateful and doubly guilty now for the fairy warrior's actions. She squeezed Bo's hands and felt an answering squeeze to reassure her.
"A noble sacrifice. She'd be proud to know it made a difference," Trick said, smiling a little.
Kenzi then commented on Ciara's picture and when Trick mentioned Dyson's name, everybody tensed. Lauren knew that the wolf had been hurt in battle as well but he apparently refused to come to the compound for treatment, weathering the pain on his own as some kind of penance.
"It's a heavy burden, loosing someone you love. Someone you tried to save," Trick commented.
His words suddenly reminded Lauren of Nadia and in a way, she had lost her too, hadn't she? But she couldn't be sorry about that, knowing that Nadia was safer away from her. If Nadia had stayed and the Garuda had somehow hurt her... Lauren couldn't even imagine how that would felt. She thought maybe she would die as well.
Her thoughts were interrupted by Bo's whispered, "When was the last time you saw your bed?"
She sighed a little, knowing that the makeup hadn't fooled the succubus. In their phone calls, Lauren had tried to sound upbeat, not wanting Bo to worry about her too, but she should have known better than to hide her fatigue for long. Bo had always cared about her but it was different now that they were together. Lauren would have to re-learn to get used to it.
"I'll sleep when I've figured out how to stabilize Lachlan's naga venom," she whispered.
"Well, if anyone can nerd out what we need, it's you doc," Kenzi said and it felt like a blessing to Lauren. She gave the goth girl an appreciative smile.
The noisy drunk stumbling in the Dal startled all of them and their twitchy nerves but Hale didn't even look embarrassed at pulling out his gun. He only looked irritated at the man.
"We need to stay on guard," Bo said, a little weary.
"The Garuda's out there, getting ever stronger," Trick said, to which Hale commented sarcastically, "He was plenty strong last time, when he whooped us."
Trick only nodded. There wasn't really anything he could say to that.
xxx
When the toasts were done, Lauren and Bo got themselves a quiet spot on the bar and then for a few minutes, simply basked in each other's presence.
"Bo."
"Lauren," they said at the same time and stopped, smiling at each other.
Bo drew her into a tight hug, "God, I missed you."
"I missed you too," Lauren admitted, inhaling deeply of Bo's scent.
"You look so tired, Lauren... I don't want you to push yourself so hard," Bo said worriedly.
"It's okay, I'm okay, Bo," Lauren said and at Bo's disbelieving look, she continued. "No, really. I'm okay, I'm used to work like this and," Lauren hesitated a little, turning away to drink the rest of her liquor. "We don't exactly have the luxury of relaxing right now. Trick's right. The Garuda is getting stronger the longer we wait..."
"I know," Bo interrupted, gulping down her drink as well. "I know that. And I... I really don't know what to do. I mean I have some ideas..." At this, Bo began to look away, her eyes unfocused as her mind drifted off for a second. "But beyond that..."
Lauren could only sigh at that. She wished she could tell Bo that the venom was ready now and that they could challenge the Garuda anytime, but she knew that the reality wasn't that easy. Even if they did have the venom, it still wasn't a guarantee that everything would be fine.
"I have to talk to Trick," Bo said, standing up. When Lauren turned to follow her, Bo waved her down. "I, I have to do it alone."
At Lauren's confused look, Bo gave her a smile and a kiss and said, "It's one of those ideas I have. I'll tell you about it later, I promise. Stay here and I'll take you to the compound so I can pay my respects to Lachlan too."
"Okay," Lauren said, feeling slightly dizzy by the lip contact. Or maybe it was the booze on an empty stomach? "Okay. I'll be here."
With one last smile, Bo was gone.
xxx
She hadn't been waiting long when Dyson appeared. The music stopped for a couple of seconds as they all acknowledged his entry and Lauren watched as he finally settled on the bar, slumped down in misery.
She approached him carefully and when it looked like he wasn't going to turn her away, Lauren grabbed two glasses, pushing one near him. "Whiskey? My treat," she said, pouring him a measure.
"You buying me a drink, huh? Really must be the end of the world," Dyson commented. Lauren noticed that he couldn't even sound sarcastic. He just sounded... empty. It was startling to match this man to the one who had seemed to enjoy tormenting her.
"You don't have to pretend with me," Lauren said gently, "It's not weak to let it out Dyson, it's human." When Dyson gave a faint smile at her choice of words, Lauren smiled back a little and backtracked, "What I meant was, it takes strength to express your pain, so that you can go on."
"All this and Nadia too," Dyson said, "I heard about her leaving you. I'm sorry, Lauren." He looked sincere and for a moment, Lauren felt another flash of guilt: that her ex was safe and his was not and that she was with Bo now and he didn't even have his love anymore. But she pushed it all away. Now wasn't the time for such thoughts. She only met his sincerity with her own and said, "Thank you."
Kenzi and Hale joined them then, but it was clear that Dyson still blamed himself for everything and he left after a while.
xxx
The drive back to the compound was silent and Lauren hesitated to break it. Bo had looked angry when she came up from Trick's apartment and she was wary of provoking the succubus' temper. Part of her chided against such cowardice but another part was relieved by the freedom from small talk. Finally though, Bo herself broke it.
"I just found out that Trick is my grandfather," she stated casually, manoeuvring around a slow moving truck.
Lauren almost choked on air and did a quick double take to glance at the succubus. "What?!"
"It's true. That's what I was talking about earlier, the idea I had? I originally thought that he was my father but it turns out he was my grandfather instead."
"Did he know who...?"
"No," Bo said, disappointedly. "My mom didn't tell him either."
Both of them fell silent for a while as they paused to consider the implications from this new information. Finally, Lauren ventured slowly. "So... that means you're actually a princess, since Trick was a king."
When she glanced at the succubus, Lauren couldn't stifle her snicker from the shocked, almost appalled look in Bo's face.
"And that means..." Lauren continued, "I'm dating a princess! My girlfriend is a princess!"
"Wha-, I'm not! I'm... Lauren, stop laughing! I'm not!" Bo said, reaching out one hand to slap Lauren lightly.
Lauren affected a mock pout. "I'm not your girlfriend?" She knew she was acting oddly but attributed it to the lack of sleep. Besides, it was fun to tease Bo once in a while, considering that it was usually the other way around.
"Of course not! I mean, yes you're my girlfriend. I meant that I'm not a princess! Stop it! What's gotten into you?" Bo argued back, although Lauren could see that she was trying to suppress a smile of her own now.
Lauren gave her an impish grin and said, "I'm sleep deprived."
When Bo only frowned harder (and Lauren suspected it was only because the succubus could barely stop the wide grin threatening to erupt from her face), she sighed theatrically and said, "Fine. Spoil my fun."
Bo gave her a mock glare that lasted only a second before she reluctantly gave a small grin. "God, I can just imagine Kenzi being all over that information," she paused and then gave Lauren a more genuine glare, "Promise me you won't tell her."
Lauren looked a bit confused, "Not tell her that you're Trick's granddaughter? Wouldn't you want to share that with her, though?"
"No, not that part. The part with the princess. I don't think she'll pick up on that right away and I don't want you to put it in her head if she didn't think of it first," Bo said.
"Oh. Okay."
"Thank you," Bo said, smiling gratefully at Lauren. "And anyway, that's not what we're supposed to think about right now. We have to think of the Garuda and how this new information can be used to defeat him."
At that point, they have already arrived by the compound. Lauren waited until Bo had rounded the car, over to her side, and began to lead the way to the hall where the funeral rites are being held.
"It has something to do with our blood, I think," Bo continued, "I'm just not sure exactly how it's supposed to work yet. I don't get how putting someone under your thrall is supposed to help us stop a Garuda," Bo paused, seeming to think that over and then said, "Well, I guess it would work but I don't think I'd want to bind a Garuda to my will, do I? I mean, how is that supposed to work in the long run? And that's assuming my blood will work on him, and if so, how am I suppose to get a sample inside of him?"
Lauren was rapidly becoming confused at the conversation Bo was conducting with herself. "Bo, I don't understand."
Bo stopped walking and turned to her, surprised. "What?" She crunched her forehead in thought and then, "Oh! Right, yeah, you weren't there with the getting-married-to-Ryan thing so you didn't know..."
"Wait. What getting-married-to-Ryan thing?!" Lauren asked, alarmed.
Bo was forced to relate the whole incident, flinching a little bit on the parts where she fed on Ryan but Lauren wasn't even paying attention to that once she realized what Bo's blood could do. Already, her mind was trying to think of how she could study the blood properties and the several ways it could be used for.
"...so fortunately Kenzi and Trick got there in time to stop us, because you know, a thousand years before being able to divorce someone, talk about awkward," Bo finished. She hesitated and then, "Um, Lauren, nothing happened with him after that. I swear," Bo added, apparently taking her prolonged silence as condemnation.
"Huh? Oh, um, yeah, of course not Bo, I understand that you need to feed and I'm okay with that."
At Bo's disbelieving look, Lauren amended her statement, "Well, not completely okay. Not yet, anyway. But I can work on that later. Right now, I'm more fascinated with your blood. I mean, we know how Trick's blood works but it doesn't work the same with your mother and now you. I would love to be able to make a genetic tree..." Lauren petered off in embarrassment once she saw Bo's raised eyebrow. "Which is really not the point as well. Oh, look, here we are," she finished awkwardly, hurrying towards the hall and forcing Bo to catch up to her.
"There's not as many people as I thought," Bo said, instantly noticing the sparse number of people milling around. Compared to Ciara's wake, and considering that this particular one was for the leader of the Light, it was really quite pathetic and more depressing.
"Lachlan wasn't very well known. Or very well liked," Lauren stated somberly, grabbing some of the mixed dirt and herbs as offering.
"If they only knew he died so we'd have a chance against the Garuda," Bo commented, following her actions as they walked towards the altar where the coffin lay.
"I know a lot of fae are leaving town," Lauren said, carefully peppering her dirt offering over the incense pot.
"Which just leaves us..." Bo said, dropping her own mix into the clay pot unceremoniously. From the corner of her eye, the succubus spotted a newcomer that prompted her to quickly add, "...and the cockroaches!"
Lauren turned around and stopped short. "Morrigan." She turned quickly back to Bo in slight panic, knowing that the succubus was likely to do something rash. "Bo, no!" she warned.
"I have to," Bo said firmly, gently shaking her arm out of Lauren's light hold. "You go ahead." Lauren didn't want to leave but there was something in Bo's eyes that told her the succubus would behave herself. She gave a short nod but before she could leave, Bo pulled her back to whisper. "And don't think I haven't forgotten that you wanted to experiment on me."
Lauren's eyes widened in surprise. "I wasn't! Just your blood! Uh, I mean, not experiment, just study, no uh, just, I mean, it's interesting...?" Lauren finished sheepishly.
Bo gave her a wicked grin that caused an inappropriate heat between her legs. "We'll talk about this later." That sultry voice, whispered directly to her ear caused Lauren to shiver. She watched Bo approach the Morrigan before she managed to stumble away on shaky legs.
xxx
Lauren went back to her rooms with a clear intention of waiting for Bo to fulfill her "promise". Unfortunately, once she sank into her comfortable couch, her body finally rebelled and pulled her into much deserved, long nap. When she woke up, it was already afternoon and for a moment, she panicked, thinking she had missed Bo's arrival (her mind swiftly created a likely scenario where the succubus had knocked on her door and because Lauren hadn't answered, left, angry at being stood up.). But then when she glanced at her phone and saw Bo's message, Lauren's mood dropped in disappointment.
The succubus had apologized, saying that an unexpected errand had come up and that she would have to postpone their "date" for "a little while" (Lauren noted that Bo insisted she was coming back soon, though.). Somewhat miffed, Lauren tried to do a little work in the meantime. It took her longer than usual to get into the zone and she had to consciously stop herself from glancing at the clock and the invitingly, open door every two minutes or so. But once she was fully absorbed into her work, she never noticed the hours passing until someone knocked, startling her.
"Bo! What happened?! Who did this to you?" Lauren asked, noticing the head wound immediately. She hurriedly made her way over to the other woman who gave her a reassuring smile and perched herself on a couch arm. "Oh, it's uh, redcaps. I need..."
"To heal. Yes, of course!" Lauren interrupted and quickly began to unbutton her shirt. (Later on, Lauren would realize that at the moment she made her offer, she hadn't been in anyway turned on - not like she had been earlier while waiting for the succubus. It was just an instinctive response to offer medical help - in whatever form, apparently. She didn't know if she should be disturbed or pleased with herself.)
Bo stopped her quickly, smiling gently. "No! No, I was gonna say an aspirin."
Lauren made a sheepish face and grinned embarrassedly. She went to grab a few antibacterial swabs, a band-aid and the requested medicine. "Right."
Bo followed her with her gaze and tried to explain, "It's not really that bad. Besides Lauren, you know that I would never..." she made a vague gesture but Lauren already understood. Bo wouldn't casually use her like that. Lauren was not and never had been like any other of Bo's numerous conquests for food or healing that was so easily discarded afterwards.
"I know," she replied, waving the moment away. "I'm not thinking clearly. It's the naga venom. I've tried every anti-coagulant known to man and fae and, there's no luck."
Bo hissed and muttered a small "Oww," when Lauren dabbed at her forehead wound. But she also smiled widely when she felt the tender kiss the doctor bestowed on her newly bandaged cut.
"There. You're right, it's not that bad. Should be gone in a couple of hours." Lauren took a step back, sighing heavily, "I'm sorry, I shouldn't be complaining of being stressed to you."
Bo took her hand and gave it a small squeeze. "I like it," she admitted, "Makes me forget what's waiting for us out there."
There was a tender look in Bo's eyes that triggered an idea in Lauren's brain. Before they had admitted their true feelings for each other, she had already known that she was important to Bo and that the succubus was attracted to her, despite the rocky moments in their past. Lauren had been aware of the tension between them, even when she was still denying to herself how much she loved the succubus, but perhaps she had also underestimated how much Bo cared for her.
"Do you remember what happened when the Lich tried to force you to feed off of me?" Lauren asked. She didn't fully know why she was bringing this topic up now but it suddenly seemed important to acknowledge it.
Bo looked confused at the random question but answered nevertheless. "Yeah, I sucked the chi out of an entire roomful of people." She was trying to be nonchalant but her unease was still obvious to Lauren.
"It scared the hell out of me," Lauren said, seeing how Bo's eyes dropped at her statement before the succubus also admitted, "Me too. The worst part is I don't know how I did it. Or what triggered my rage."
Lauren couldn't help the smug feeling rise inside her and she let it seep into a small smile, stepping closer to the other woman. "Well, I have a hypothesis," she paused, looking into Bo's eyes. "I think it's because of what we feel for each other."
Lauren saw the instant that Bo's eyes darkened dangerously and her breath caught in her throat. The mood had changed so suddenly that she almost felt dizzy.
"You take my breath away," Bo whispered, staring at her intently. Her gaze was almost tangible and Lauren could swear that she felt it sear her skin.
"Breathless," she whispered back, almost hypnotized by the sight of Bo coming nearer and nearer still, their lips a hair's breadth apart. She could feel the succubus' breath on her face and almost felt scared, like she was facing a wild animal that would devour her in a second. Almost fear but not quite, just enough to send her nerves singing with the tension.
"Completely," Bo said before finally kissing her.
It was... explosive. It was like Lauren had never been kissed before and every feeling became magnified to a hundredth degree. Bo's lips and teeth and tongue - the science-y part of her brain that never rested couldn't understand how such ordinary body parts could produce such a devastating reaction in her. But soon there were no more thoughts, just feelings that made her cling to the other woman in abandon.
When they parted, slightly woozy from the lack of air, an unpleasant thought crossed Lauren's mind. She must have shown it in her expression because Bo asked worriedly, "What is it? Lauren, are you okay? Did I...?"
Lauren cut her off with a quick kiss before Bo could wind herself up with misplaced concern. "Yes. I'm good, great even. I can't even feel my legs after that kiss, Bo."
Bo looked alarmed for a second before she figured out that Lauren wasn't talking in a literal "she got chi-sucked-therefore-weak-legs"; and then she could only smile smugly. But Lauren continued, "It's just that, I wanted to do this some more but I think I just figured out the key to preserving Lachlan's venom."
Bo's face drooped drastically. Lauren instantly backpedalled and gave Bo another quick kiss and a small nuzzle (she told herself it was for comfort but really, Bo's lips were just that addictive) before she said, "I just need a quick minute to jot the idea down and then I'll work on it later! I don't want to stop this." She hugged Bo tighter and sighed, "I want you."
Bo hugged her back for a while before she pulled away. Lauren took that to mean that she had to start writing her ideas down now but Bo stopped her before she could take a step away. "Lauren," Bo sighed, "I want this too, believe me. But maybe it's better to not, I mean, this isn't the time. You need to work on the venom because that's important and..." she hesitated, trying to read Lauren's expression, "I do have more errands..."
Lauren sighed as well but forced herself to swallow her disappointment. Bo was right, this wasn't the time for that. She gave her a small, resigned smile which the succubus returned. Unable to help herself, Lauren stole another quick kiss and gave a murmured "I love you" before she retreated to safety behind her desk. When she looked up, Bo's eyes were twinkling, and she also mouthed "I love you" back to the doctor.
Their earlier disappointment now abated, Bo asked curiously, "How did you figure it out, anyway?" she gestured at the vials containing the naga venom. "If you tell me that it had something to do with my lips, I probably won't believe you."
Lauren grinned at that. "No, nothing to do with your lips. It was something you said about breathlessness and I realized that the naga venom is only de-oxygenated when it's in stasis." She knew she looked too excited for something as simple as de-oxygenation but Bo only had that familiar, adoring smile in her face whenever Lauren did something geeky.
"Glad I could be of help," Bo said sincerely.
Lauren smiled back at her and simply said, "See you soon?"
Bo nodded and began to back away. "See you soon," she promised.
xxx
That promised soon came earlier than she expected.
A mere three hours had passed when Lauren got a mass text message informing her of an important meeting at the Dal. This time they had all gathered together before Bo finally came in, trailed by a sneering Vex.
Lauren was surprised and slightly alarmed by the Mesmer's appearance but she also immediately realized the implications of his presence. Bo's introduction of their newest "member" only confirmed her thoughts but then her mind abandoned the various ramifications of having Vex as a team mate and she focused instead on Bo's halting words.
The succubus was obviously scared and sad over the recent events, her voice trembling a bit, but Lauren could also see how brave and determined she was as she finally accepted the mantle of leadership. Despite her own fears, Lauren could feel her heart swelling with pride for Bo and she was glad to stand beside her in this war. Except, before Lauren could say anything, Dyson stole the words right out of her mouth.
There was a look in Dyson's eye that suddenly made Lauren wary. She couldn't figure out what it was but she knew that something had changed in the wolf since she'd last saw him. He looked still looked beat up but also... lighter, like the dark, heavy cloud that burdened him earlier had vanished. And then there was also the way he was looking at Bo and the way he had promised that he would be with her 'til the end.
It caused something a lot like a dread to pool in her stomach but she didn't let it show in her voice when Lauren reaffirmed Dyson's vow to include all of them.
xxx
That night, she was startled by the sudden knock on her front door. Lauren glanced confusedly at her wall clock and saw that it was already 2 in the morning. After-hours work wasn't unusual in the fae compound but she usually got a warning phone call first before they actually sent someone to come get her. A sudden idea caused her jump to her feet to open the door, all the while hoping that one of her patients hadn't taken a turn for the worse.
But instead of a messenger standing by, there was only Bo, smiling at her.
Lauren smiled back automatically before she blinked in alarm. "Bo? What are you...? Are you okay? Is someone hurt?"
Bo stepped closer to grab and squeeze her hands gently. "Relax, Lauren. I'm fine. Everything's fine."
"Oh. That's good," Lauren said, going back to looking confused.
Bo gave her a teasing smirk. "You know, you're going to give me a complex, with the way you always greet me whenever I come here."
Lauren ducked her head in embarrassment. "I'm sorry. I'm just not used to having actual visitors who come for me and not for Dr. Lewis."
"Then you better get used to it soon because I plan to be here all the time," Bo declared matter-of-factly.
"I can see that," Lauren said, regaining herself to tease back.
It was Bo's turn for a little shyness. "I just wanted to see you," she admitted.
"Oh!" Lauren smiled widely, "Okay, um. Actually, please come in." She stepped aside so the succubus could enter. "Do you want something to drink or..."
"No, I'm good," Bo said, "Kenzi got us some good fake champagne earlier and..." she shrugged.
Still holding Lauren's hand, Bo pulled her gently to the couch. Lauren followed obediently, still smiling a little. "You guys had a mini-party?"
"A pre-fae-apocalypse party," Bo corrected.
"Ah," Lauren said, raising her eyebrow teasingly, "And now you're here?"
Bo grinned but then her expression dimmed a little, "I'm sorry to barge in on you like this. I know it's late..."
"It's okay, Bo. I wasn't sleeping yet, as you can see," Lauren gestured to the same clothes she was still wearing from earlier. "I was working on the naga venom still. I think I can have some samples ready by tomorrow."
Bo looked excited. "Really? Wow. I didn't expect you to finish it so soon. That's really good news, Lauren."
Lauren gave an indifferent shrug but her voice reflected her tiredness. "It's what I do."
Bo didn't miss it. Looking worried now, she scooted closer to the doctor and cupped her cheek. "You need to rest."
"I do. I mean, I had a nap earlier. I'm okay," Lauren said, leaning on the touch and nuzzling Bo's hand. "Tell me why you're here." Lauren's voice was soft but held a hint of demand that, along with her raspy, tired tone, coloured the atmosphere between them with unintended sensuality.
Bo breathed deeply, as though she was trying to control herself, before answering. "Kenzi said something about being with my girl tonight and that I shouldn't be alone. I told her that I wasn't alone and I stayed with her but," Bo paused to look her in the eye, "I realized that I was just waiting for her to fall asleep, that I do want to come here and be with you..." she petered off uncertainly.
Lauren guessed Bo's turmoil immediately. "Bo, it's not a crime to want to spend time with the people you care for, you shouldn't feel guilty about it." She gave Bo a small grin, "Besides, I wouldn't have been good company for you earlier anyway. I was still working on the venom formula."
Bo returned her grin but she still looked a bit serious. "It's not just leaving her like that, that bothers me. It's, uh, you know about Nate right? I just didn't want Kenzi to feel left out just because I have a significant other to spend our last night on Earth."
When Lauren frowned at her over the last phrase, Bo's grin grew wider and she tried to amend statement, "Last night before the big battle?"
"Much better," Lauren said, nodding as she moved forward to hug Bo fully. "For what it's worth though, I'm really glad you came."
Bo only gave a lazy hum of satisfaction and smiled, gathering Lauren to her until their bodies were so close, it was hard to tell where one ended and the other began.
They were silent for a while, basking in each other's presence when Lauren suddenly asked, "How did you get Vex to join the team, anyway?"
"What?" Bo asked, startled and slightly worried. Lauren didn't notice, her mind trying to solve the problem in front of her.
"I've been wondering how you were able to recruit him for a while now," Lauren said, "but I couldn't really figure it out. I know the Morrigan would never willingly hand over his leash to you so... oh Bo," Lauren sat up a bit to look Bo in the eye, "you didn't make a bargain with the Morrigan, did you?"
Bo fidgeted under that stare. Lauren, who up until then hadn't really believed her own theory, pulled away from the succubus completely. "Bo! Tell me you didn't?!"
"No! No. It's not like that, Lauren, I swear," Bo said immediately, pulling Lauren back to her. "It's... I did make a deal but it's really complicated."
Lauren looked worried and exasperated. "You made a complicated deal?"
"No! No, just... ugh! She wanted something from the Ash's vault in exchange for Vex so..."
"You stole from the Ash's vault?!" Lauren's voice rose in panic and frustration.
"Shh! Lauren! Somebody will hear you!" Bo said quickly, barely resisting the urge to cover Lauren's mouth with her hand. She knew that if she did, the chances of the doctor biting her for real were high - she looked that irritated.
"How did you even know where... ugh damn it. The map I gave you last year so you can borrow the Koushang," Lauren slumped, disappointed with herself.
"Lauren, I'm..." Bo was going to say she was sorry but she really wasn't that bothered about the whole notion of stealing from the Light fae so she just said, "There weren't any guards and the doors were open when I got there, okay? And I know that still doesn't give me a right to just barge in and take whatever I want but I... we needed Vex."
Lauren sighed but she didn't look so distressed now and Bo allowed herself to relax a little. The doctor was muttering a little to herself and Bo only caught the part about "talking to Serena about the guard".
"Anyway, it turns out that getting Vex was more complicated than that. He had some redcaps gunning for his blood,"
"Your wound earlier," Lauren murmured but not really interrupting.
"Yeah and then they kidnapped him from my house in exchange for the thing I stole for the Morrigan. So I had to get it back from her, trade it to the redcaps for Vex again and then things really got out of hand. Did you know the Morrigan has the power to melt people?! Like literally turn them into yucky pools of goo?" Bo asked wide eyed, fascinated and yet at the same time, unable to keep from shivering in disgust.
"Of course, Bo. She's Leanan sidhe." Lauren looked surprised at her. "You didn't think she got to be the Morrigan when her only talent was to boost other people's talents, did you?"
Bo's grimace was answer enough. "I just, I guess I never really thought about it. You know, once I think I'm finally getting the hang of the fae world, something even more weird or gross would come up, and then it feels like a clueless 'noob' again, as Kenzi would say."
"You're doing just fine, Bo. You've already learned so much and your progress with the fae has actually been faster than expected considering you've only just stumbled into this world two years ago. I mean, look at you now: the champion."
Bo grimaced again but before she could comment on that, Lauren was speaking again. "How were you able to escape the Morrigan anyway? I assume that once she started killing people, she didn't just stop to let you go. Especially if you stole from her in the first place. Which by the way, you also have to tell me how you accomplished that."
Now Bo looked really reluctant but Lauren was starting to become suspicious.
Still, the succubus continued with the story so Lauren held her other questions in.
"Uh, Vex helped me. He used her powers to knock her out and we escaped." Bo scowled when she suddenly remembered the whole reason behind the afternoon adventure. "It was so stupid, Lauren! She had me steal fae aphrodisiac from the Ash's vault, and don't even get me started on why he had that thing in his vault in the first place; we're on the brink of war and they're... they're so selfish! Thinking only of their pleasures! They didn't even think about defending themselves or trying to fight back, the Dark just accepted that the end of the world is coming soon and it was time to party harder!"
Lauren was silent, allowing Bo to vent her frustrations.
Bo sighed heavily and this time she was more calm when she spoke again. "Vex was different, at least. He didn't want to die and that's why he's willing to help us." Bo fidgeted in her seat, restless now after her outburst.
Lauren only took her hand and rubbed it soothingly. "Lachlan had approached the Morrigan for an alliance before, against the Garuda."
Bo looked up in surprise.
Lauren continued, "They were never able to build anything, though. It was too hard, I guess. They were both looking out for their own group and well, without compromise..."
"But the Garuda is here!" Bo insisted, getting a bit worked up again. "They have a common enemy now, why can't they just let go of their differences to, I don't know, survive?"
Lauren didn't react to her sarcasm and only kept her calm manner. "Bo, the Light and Dark have never been able to play nice in a thousand years. The mere fact that they could somehow keep the peace between themselves now is a miracle and only because of an astounding power that practically changed the universe's laws. Why do you think the Garuda is so adamant on making them go back to war?" Lauren sighed. "In some ways, this whole truce between the Light and Dark is the unnatural event and the Garuda is in the right of it. Trick's manipulation of the events was just that, a manipulation. It wasn't meant to be even though it did bring a lot of good."
Lauren took Bo's other hand and began to rub them both comfortingly. "What I'm trying to say is that, despite the threat of the Garuda, I never really expected the Light and Dark to join forces anyway. Not even Lachlan was hopeful and he had known better than anyone what kind of threat the Garuda is.
"And besides," here Lauren hesitated, prompting Bo to ask, "Lauren?"
"I mean, there's something ominous in the atmosphere, with the outbreak of violence and the general malaise, and that's why most of the fae are leaving town. But it's all sort of intangible, there's no real solid enemy to focus on, just the whispers of Garuda - a fae fairy tale monster. I think that makes it harder to rally people together. If there was an outright attack, perhaps things would be different."
"Lachlan was attacked in his office! What more kind of attack do these people need?" Bo asked in outrage.
"No, not like that. No one saw it happened and it was almost... not violent. There wasn't even any blood, the heat from the sword cauterized the wound immediately. I'm sorry, I'm not explaining it well. I just..." Lauren trailed off, looking helplessly at Bo.
Bo sighed and squeezed Lauren's hand gently. "It's okay, Lauren. I think I do know what you're trying to say. I'm just frustrated and scared. Mostly scared."
They both fell silent, trying to absorb the unexpected heavy conversation.
But then Lauren's forehead furrowed as she remembered something, "Oh, by the way, how were you able to steal the aphrodisiac back from the Morrigan?"
Bo's abrupt imitation of a deer facing headlights set of an internal alarm.
"Bo?" Lauren asked warily. "I don't want to hear the answer to this, do I?" she continued, bracing herself. She already had a vague suspicion of what happened, courtesy of her overactive imagination.
At her last question, Bo let out the breath she was holding and sort of slumped before quickly saying, "Iseducedherandthenhandcuffed hertothebedwhensheletdownher guard."
A small silence fell before Lauren blinked. "I think I got that. You seduced her, then handcuffed her when she gave in and that's when you stole the aphrodisiac back."
Bo nodded, cringing slightly even though Lauren hadn't really reacted yet.
Taking a deep breath, Lauren continued, "And you... fed on her?"
Bo nodded again, feeling like curling into a ball. There was a strange look in Lauren's eyes that she couldn't interpret.
"During sex?"
"No!" Bo reacted immediately, grabbing Lauren's arms gently as though to shake her. "No! I didn't have sex with her. I just..." she deflated again and released the doctor. "I kissed her and yeah, I used my powers and fed on her."
"Oh."
Bo blinked and looked up to see Lauren had also slumped back to the couch. She didn't realize how tense the doctor was before.
"Oh?"
Lauren waved a lazy hand and when she answered, her voice seemed to reflect her tiredness even more. "You just kissed. It's okay, Bo. I'm not, well, I'm still a little upset but it's okay. I thought you had sex with her while feeding and I'm really not ready for that yet. I'm already working on it but I guess it'll take some time before I feel uh, before I stop feeling hurt about it..."
Bo hurriedly interrupted Lauren's rambling. "Wait, what? You're okay with me kissing her and ... you're working on being okay with me having sex with other people?" she sounded angry and hurt but Lauren only smiled at her. It was a calm smile, tinged with sadness and love and acceptance.
"Yes," she answered simply.
But Bo couldn't just leave it like that. "What the hell, Lauren?!"
Before Bo could storm out or complain, Lauren stopped her with a gentle touch and said, "I knew from the beginning what you are, Bo."
Bo flinched at that although it was clear that Lauren didn't mean it as a condemnation.
Lauren continued. "I knew and I accepted it. I admit that your being fae and a succubus was a large part of my worries regarding my feelings for you but now that we're together, I can't let myself worry about it anymore. I want to believe that our love would be enough and that we could still be together. I'm not going to demand that you starve yourself to death just because we're in a relationship now..."
"I'd do it," Bo interjected, staring deep into her eyes so Lauren could see her sincerity, "I don't care if I starve and grow weak, I'd do it. I don't want to hurt you, Lauren. I love you so much."
Lauren smiled and kissed her gently. "I know," she said and for a second, Lauren almost lost her hard-earned calm and broke down sobbing. Because as much as she tried to pretend that it wasn't a big deal, this topic really hurt her. The thought of Bo being with other people was like a constant stabbing knife wound messing up her organs. But she wanted them to have a real chance; she wanted to believe in what she was saying that love was enough. To do that, she had to be realistic as well - after all, how was she supposed to have a relationship with the succubus if Bo was dead from starvation?
"I love you too," Lauren continued and cupped Bo's cheek, "I love every bit of you and that means your hunger and your powers too. I don't want you to change anything." Lauren sighed. "It's going to be hard, I know that," and she couldn't help but looked pained.
Bo wasn't able to resist and gathered her into a hug. "Lauren."
"It's going to be hard," Lauren persisted, "but I can do it. I know I got jealous and hurt whenever you were with Dyson, but honestly, I think it's mainly because its him. Parts of me, the scientist part, you might say, understands perfectly why you have to be with other people. I figure, I'm probably half way to acceptance because of that. And I know I can work on this. I can accept it because I know how you feel about me and I trust that. I trust you. I want to make this work. I can be strong for us." Bo opened her mouth to comment but Lauren's next statement baffled her. "because I understand it."
"What?" Bo asked instead, pulling away.
"I understand the biology of it but I also understand how it feels as well."
Bo's confused look prompted Lauren to continue, "I know what it's like to sleep with people you don't care for just because they make you feel something. It's not the exact same thing but the concept is near enough so... I can do this, Bo. I can let you go with other people as long as I know you love me."
"You understand? How? I thought... Nadia..." Bo stuttered, more confused than before but feeling slightly angry now.
Lauren ducked her head in silence and it didn't take long before Bo connected the dots. "You slept with someone else while Nadia was in a coma? Not just with me." The succubus voice was flat and it was more terrifying than if it had been accusing instead.
"I did."
"You cheated."
Lauren sighed, beginning to get frustrated and feeling the beginnings of a headache. A part of her felt that Bo was being hypocritical. After all, she slept with her too. But maybe it was the knowledge that Bo wasn't the only one, the special person that convinced Lauren to "cheat", that the succubus found hard to accept.
"In body, yes. It's probably crass of me to compare it like this but I just wanted you to know that I understand what it's like to divorce the needs of the body from the needs of the heart!"
But she could see that Bo wasn't really listening now. "I didn't... not in a million years would I ever think you were capable of this, Lauren." Her voice shook with betrayal and hurt.
Lauren snapped, breaking the tenuous hold over her own raging feelings. "Capable of what? Don't look at me like that, Bo! I loved Nadia!"
Bo lost control as well. "I know, Lauren. I know how much you loved her! You practically sacrificed your life for her, do you think I could forget that?!" They were both standing now, separated by a couple of feet that suddenly seemed wider than a mile.
"But you don't know what it was like for me either!" Lauren yelled back, "You don't know how hard it was back then, how agonizing it was to see her look like that under that fucking pod everyday and not be able to do anything about it!"
Bo looked shocked at Lauren's cursing but she didn't interrupt.
"You can't know how hard it was to be the odd human in a fae world! I was dying a little bit everyday and I just wanted..." Lauren faltered, her voice cracking at the remembered anguish. "I wanted to feel again, even if it was temporary. So yes, I slept with other people and I didn't love them nor cared for them. I used them to fill the gaping hole in me." Lauren sighed and closed her eyes, her hand coming up to rub her forehead and then the bridge of her nose. "I just wanted you to know..."
Lauren looked defeated and the tired bags under her eyes became more prominent. The silence between them was still heavy and awkward until,
"I'm sorry," Bo said softly. "I'm really sorry, Lauren. I didn't mean to... I was just shocked and upset. Not, not so much about your past, I think. But I'm upset with me. I hate the thought of being with anyone else but you. I hate the thought of hurting you like that and mostly, I think I hate myself for not being strong enough like you." Bo held out a trembling hand to the doctor, "Lauren?"
Bo breathed deeply when her hand was taken and she gently tugged the other woman closer into a full body hug. They both sighed in relief as Bo murmured apologies into Lauren's ear. When they pulled back a little, Lauren looked more relaxed and Bo looked determined.
"We'll both work on it," Bo vowed, "I, it's gonna be hard for me too but if you can be strong and trust me then, I'll trust you too. I love you, Lauren and I'm not giving up on us."
Lauren almost sagged in her arms as the final tension in her body dissolved. It was upsetting to talk of her past with the fae but it was also cathartic and she allowed herself to release a few tears that were quickly absorbed by Bo's jacket. Now that she knew that Bo was willing to compromise and do everything to make their relationship work, she could finally relax and begin to let go of her fears.
In a way, this felt like the real beginning of their relationship.
"I love you too, Bo. So much."
They stayed that way for a while, hugging and swaying slightly before Lauren pulled away.
"Will you stay tonight? Just sleep. I'm really tired and..."
"Yes," Bo interrupted, smiling now. "I'd stay forever even if it meant just sleeping with you, as long as I know you're beside me when I wake up," she added in a soft whisper.
Lauren still heard and she smiled too. "Deal."
A/N2 (Aug 14, 2012): Whew. Finally this chapter is out. I didn't realize it would take this long. Lots of hard topics for Bo and Lauren here. I didn't really plan this to happen in this particular chapter but it all flowed out so...
Anyway, writing this made me realize that the Into the Dark episode is kinda weird. First, everything seemed to happen in one day because Bo didn't change outfits. Except for when she seduced the Morrigan, which by the way, why was she already in her night gown? My best theory is that she was already going to try the barnacle goose aphrodisiac and Bo waylaid her playmate on the way. Second, Bo came to Lauren for aspirin but Lauren gave her a band aid instead. And why head to Lauren if the wound is insignificant? Why didn't Bo have an aspirin at home? And lastly, listening to their conversation, the whole Lich thing seemed oddly placed. Why bring it up?
Argh. So those are my frustrations writing this chapter. The rest were fine and I loved Doccubus even though they kept making me write out scenes and dialogues making it harder to get this thing ready for .
I did love the way I was able to change the near-miss Doccubus scenes and make them "properly Doccubus-ed" (It's 2:30am, I'm tired and probably not making sense so please forgive that made up verb.) - the kiss, the ending etc. Hee hee.
Next chapter is probably gonna be the last.
Cheers,
rabastan04
A/N3 (Aug 25, 2012): Finally got the guts to look at this again. All in all, I think I did well for such a rush job. (Tootin my own horn, I know. I'm sorry.) Anyway, just wanted to say that I added a small line at the part where Bo accused Lauren of cheating. It felt wrong when I re-read it and now I "fixed" it. :) Hope it didn't confuse anyone.