Chapter 0036: Wings of hope

"Oh no" – Seth stated sardonically into his bagel, and Sandy groaned.

"Stop it" – Ryan beat him to it.

"But–"

"Be nice" – Sandy reproached.

"Fine, whatever"

Kirsten was excitedly listing a number of online schools and community colleges close–by, and what courses they offered, and asking them for their opinion (but not really, because she quickly went from course to course, almost as if speaking to herself).

It was adorable and Sandy wanted to squeeze the life out of her, he adored her so much.

"–you think?" – she looked at them expectantly.

"They all sound amazing, honey!" – Sandy moved over to embrace and kiss her, fully ignoring Seth's gagging sounds and Ryan quiet chuckle – "So you're not happy about having taken over Newport's development business, now you're looking for more areas to crush?"

"Hulk Smash" – Seth said under his breath, and Ryan elbowed him into silence.

"Ooh, but I don't know which courses to pick! How do I choose?!" – she fretted, and Sandy wanted to coo at her, because she sounded so unlike the intense and focused Kirsten all those years ago.

"You will choose something you're interested in, and if you don't like it, you'll drop it. Regardless, you will do so well it will be embarrassing for everyone else in your class"

"Don't be silly, Sandy"

"Why, ma'am, I am never silly!"

Seth started to mumble something but instead yelped. Looking at the teens, the brunet was pouting and massaging his arm, and the blond was grinning sweetly.

"How about cooking?" – Sandy proposed.

"Ooh...! But I wouldn't need to go to community college, I'm sure there are other places for cooking lessons..." – Kirsten started saying, almost to herself. She looked over at Ryan and hummed for a moment before turning back to Sandy.

"Really mom, cooking?" – Seth whined – "Don't you still have scars from the last time you came anywhere near trying to cook?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about, son, and I would appreciate it if you would kindly grab me some juice. Please" – she added, and Seth said something under his breath as he nonetheless practically crawled over to the fridge to do as told.

"Here, sire" – the boy grumbled and Kirsten pinched his cheek, making him cry out in surprise – "Mom! C'mon, not the cheek!" – he rushed to hide behind Ryan, holding his face as if he had been punched.

"You're just so cute sometimes"

"You are evil, and I do not like it. Ryan, Ry, we should leave before she starts with the mama bear hugs, and while they can be nice when you're sick and all, they are not good when you want to continue breathing. So... C'mon, let's go grab something to eat"

"It's eight in the morning!" – Sandy exclaimed amusedly as Seth pulled at a sighing Ryan, and a couple of moments later, the door slammed behind them – "We've raised such a dramatic kid" – he commented to his wife, who shrugged and drank some juice.

"So, will you also try to tell me not to take cooking lessons?" – he smiled playfully and put his hands on her waist.

"Only for your continued health, dear wife, but I'm sure you'll be able to make it work somehow. Besides, I'm sure Ryan would appreciate having someone else that can cook around here, you know I can pretty much only grill"

"And you grill so beautifully, but yes, I'm sure he'd like it"

"Even if he's too nice to say anything about it"

"Well, obviously, it's Ryan"

"Of course. Hmm..."

"What is it?"

"Are you really going to start cooking now, hun?"

"Sandy..."

"What! I like you having fingers and not being horribly burned!" – she rolled her eyes.

"I'm sure that will be in the first lesson" – her tone was bland and all too close to Seth's when he was being particularly sarcastic – "Cooking 101 – Don't maim yourself and others"

"If it's not, it certainly should be"

"Maybe something a little more hands on as well... Pottery, maybe?"

"Sure, sure, whatever you feel like it" – he smiled and kissed her gently – "Just maybe don't go off to Law School, I rather like being the only lawyer in the house" – she snickered and kissed him back.

"I promise I will allow you to be the only one with a Law degree in the house. Well, for now anyway, who knows what the boys' major is going to be"

"God, can you imagine SETH as a lawyer?" – they paused and shivered.

"I love that boy, but, oh no"

"I second that"

"And I doubt Ryan would be interested in that"

"I don't know, I can sense a fellow do–gooder"

"Please don't go encouraging that" – he gasped.

"You don't want another Sandy Cohen in the world?!"

"Sandy"

"What?"

"I think I'm going to start looking for cooking classes"

"You do that. But remember–"

"Yes, Sandy, I know. Cooking 101"

"Exactly. And I'm sure the boys would agree wholeheartedly with me that you are all the more beautiful with your eyebrows intact and no burns to be seen"

"So you'll love me less if I burn myself?"

"Hmm... Let me think" – she looked flatly at him, and he couldn't help but chuckle and kiss her again.

Another shortie with little to no content, except Kirsten wanting to get her hands dirty... And maybe her interests will eventually meet Ryan's ;)

Someone mentioned the Caleb loneliness, so... I just wanted to humanize him a little bit, to round him up as a negligent father, but a deeply lonesome creature at the same time. He doesn't know how to show affection and love, and it's shitty, it's real, and it sucks. The same person also brought up The Oliver, which made me have an idea on how to take his arc, so thanks? Although I'm not sure you guys will like it lol

As for someone else's kinda understandable frustrated rant about what this story was supposed to be and the direction it has taken, and I can only answer that I only wanted to explore how Ryan would be like in this world where he's a bastard child of Caleb Nichol of all people, and that's what I've been doing. As for Thanksgiving and this and that trauma, etc, my opinion for a while now is that this story is ultimately a SLOW BURN. It's gonna take a while for Ryan to even acknowledge certain hang–ups and hurt feelings, if he will at all. It's building within him, and it will come out. The Cohens are in a bubble of, Things are a little confusing and tense at times, but it's fine, isn't it fine? It's fine. –– And it is not all fine under the surface.

This story has been very much about what's perceived by the characters about themselves and others, it's about the tip of the iceberg, and I am showing the rest of the Titanic Killer little by little. Ryan's feelings of inadequacy and inferiority and deep hurt between the Atwoods, Caleb and even the Cohens will come out eventually – and let's not forget, the show did drop the ball in regards to Ryan a bunch, he forgave even fucking FRANK, and he straight up says he got drunk and beat up his family, so a lack of confronting one's demons and one's family shit will also be an ingredient here because hey, some shit you take in and it is never discussed. Would we prefer it if Ryan could discuss EVERY shitty thing that's ever been done to him? Of course. Will he? Never. There's not enough time in the world to write it all and still be alright with all the characters, even the Cohens, and the more humanized Caleb I've been trying for, and even Ryan. So, no, his bad experiences in Newport and beyond, will mostly inform how he acts and reacts, but he will eventually open his mouth and TALK about his feelings. May be a little hurtful to write, maybe read, so I'm taking my time.

I hope the next several chapters will help form a better context of things, one way or another. They are a little longer, at the very least.

PS: As previously commented, work has been a little crazy, so if shit continues as is, I may have to slow things down in a month or something, but it's after the mostly worst of the Chrismukkah drama.