Chapter Thirty Six- Give Him a Pat on the Back

Disclaimer-Most of these characters belong to JK Rowling, I'm just borrowing…

Severus took a deep breath and opened the double doors. When he did he felt a rush of cold air hit his face and waved his hair out from over his eyes. Instantly everyone in the classroom turned and stared at him. Looking straight ahead he stowed his wand in his sleeve and walked in.

Horace Slughorn had a large smile on his face, so did Lily he noticed, as he slowly and painfully sat beside her. He leaned forward in his seat, so as to not let his back touch the back of the chair. It hurt too badly for him to turn his head but he saw Lily out of the corner of his eye and she grabbed his hand and squeezed it for a second.

"So glad you could join us Mr. Snape. Okay, as you can all see, the ingredients you need are all before you. The instructions are on the board. Everyone will work on the hair growing potion. Severus and Lily, I want you two to continue where you left off, with the cleaning potion."

At first Severus was shocked that he would have to make that potion, the one that nearly killed him. He glanced up at his Head of House, who had just given him a wink. That man wanted him to face his fears all right. Severus quietly and slowly reached for the ingredients. Each movement he made caused him terrible pain, as he could feel the tender skin stretch and burn and sometimes snap. He worked in silence as he felt fluid slowly drip down his back. The two were standing over their shared cauldron. He found it easier to chop the ingredients whilst she stirred, as stirring would hurt too much he thought.

"How are you?" she whispered. He turned his entire body to face her, as turning his head would have caused too much pain.

"I've been better, are you all right? You were bleeding," he said, deeply concerned.

"Oh yeah, I'm fine. I hit my head on the floor when you…um, jumped on me. That's all, it was nothing. I was so scared for you," she whispered louder, loud enough for their Professor to hear and give them a stern look.

"Don't worry," he mouthed, handing her the flobber worms. While he was facing her he glanced over to see one very worried looking Remus Lupin staring back at him. He mouthed the word "HI" and then continued with his brew. Potter and Black were giving Severus dirty looks, not to his surprise. He turned back to face the front and continued with his work.

He hoped that after what happened, Potter and Black would just leave him alone. He had a feeling however, that would not be the case.

He gasped out loud more than once throughout the course of the class. Sudden pain would jolt his system if he moved the wrong way, or breathed too deeply. Each time he'd gasp he noticed all other sounds in the room would stop and he could feel all eyes on him. Slughorn would come over each time to ask if he was okay or not. He usually would be unable to speak or acknowledge him in anyway, but once he'd stop squinting his eyes he'd try to communicate through them that he was all right.

Near the end of class, they finished their potion. He presented it to Slughorn who said it was "the most perfect one he'd seen," and gave them both 'O's' for their effort.

He was relieved when the class was over. He turned and faced Wilkes for the first time, who indeed had his bag.

"I'll see you in Transfiguration then," Wilkes said heading off. Severus waited until the class emptied out to head up the stairs for McGonagall's class. He didn't want to run the risk of anyone rubbing up against him in the crowded hall ways and he could not walk fast either, especially up steps.

He waited for five minutes and then made the long walk alone towards the classroom. Lily wanted to walk with him but he did not want to her to be tardy on his account, so he asked her to just go ahead.

He hated walking into classrooms late, excused or otherwise. He did not like interrupting things and bringing more attention to himself. He opened the heavy door as slowly and as quietly as possible, and hoped to enter the room un-noticed. This naturally was not the case. The Professor was already deep into her instruction when he arrived. She stopped what she was saying and watched as he walked as slowly as possible across the front of the classroom to his seat next to Lily.

"Very happy to see you Mr. Snape, I was just explaining today's assignment. Today we will turn pamphlets into books. Each book should be at least nine inches long and two inches thick. I want hard cover books. The week before last you studied the incantation and movements, today is the practical. Mr. Snape since you were absent you will have extra time to complete this task."

He smiled as best he could and read the board with the instructions. He figured if he tried hard enough, he would be able to complete the task that very day, which was his goal as he did not want to fall behind anymore than he already had.

The incantation was simple enough, but the wand movement was extremely difficult. Not only would it have been a challenge under normal circumstances, but with his arms hurting from his shoulders and neck, he found it nearly impossible to perform that task.

He noticed Lily got it correct on her first attempt. He was happy for her; she must have practiced over the holiday.

He closed his eyes and tried to work through the pain; he muttered the incantation and flickered his wand as best he could. His pamphlet did not turn into a book at all, but instead it caught fire.

Some people in the room gasped while most others laughed. He was down right pissed off. While trying to make the appropriate movements he felt and heard his back tear in three different places. People laughing were not helping his mood either. He must have had a very aggravated look on his face, since Professor McGonagall was approaching fast and not looking very happy.

"Mr. Snape, that was incorrect. You did not raise your wand high enough in the air, nor did you move your arm in the forty-five degree angle, yours was more of a twenty."

Shit was she going to berate him all day? He did the best he could and it was his first attempt!

He shot her a very fierce look as her face suddenly softened, some. She came closer and nearly whispered to him. "This takes practice and I don't need you furthering your injury on trying this today. I told you you'd have extra time, I prefer you work on the theory and not the practical today."

He said nothing and stared back at her. He did not want to sit in class, in horrific pain reading about arm angles. He wanted to just try them, even if it meant burning each pamphlet as he tried.

He ignored her and tried again. On his second attempt, his pamphlet turned into a smallish notebook, and then it disintegrated into dust. McGonagall shot the stubborn boy another fierce look.

One by once each of his classmates completed the task. Some got 'O's', including Lily and that blasted Potter. Most received 'E's'. He heard his various class mates talk about how much practice they had done and what disasters they had while trying that transfiguration out. He heard Lupin tell Black he tried all week and the only time he did it right was just then in front of McGonagall. Pettigrew said his had turned into a stamp and then blew up before he got his right.

The class was nearly complete and he decided to have one more go at it. He knew that his back and shoulders would rip more if he did the movements they way they needed to be done, but at that point he no longer cared. He wanted to get it over with and move on with his life. He again reminded himself he'd never have the need to turn a pamphlet into a book, so once he did it, he'd never need to do it again.

He stood up and took a deep breath. He raised his arm which caused his shoulder to tear; he winced the incantation through the pain and then quickly moved his arm to the forty five degree angle before flickering his wrist. The pain was torturous but when he was done, he opened his eyes and saw through the tears a black leather bound book on his desk. It appeared to be one foot in length and six inches thick. He turned that damned pamphlet into an encyclopedia! He was panting heavily and beginning to get light headed when he saw the Professor approach him. She stared into the tear filled eyes on his sweat covered face.

"Mr. Snape, I believe I said nine inches and two inches thick. This is much lager and heavier. The binding on the leather is pristine. Your arm movement was flawless. Did you study this move prior to this class?"

"No," he whispered, unable to find his voice through the pain.

"Very well, twenty points to Slytherin! And an 'O' for Mr. Snape, for sheer stubbornness and determination!" she said as Lily smiled and squeezed his hand again. When he felt her squeeze his hand he involuntarily moved his head to look at her. That naturally, caused him even more pain to which he whimpered loudly and fell promptly to the floor.

He fell on his bum, thank goodness and not on his back. The Professor rushed to his side and Lily sat next to him and held his hand tighter.

"Oh God Sev, what happened?"

'You happened' is what he wanted to say.

"Mr. Snape, you are not well," McGonagall said. "The rest of you are dismissed."

"I'm fine, really, I turned my head and this pain shot right to me fuckin' head," he cried without noticing the bluntness of his statement. Lily's eyes shot out of her head as she covered her mouth.

"Sev!"

"It's all right Miss Evans. Perhaps you should retire to the infirmary Mr. Snape," the Professor said, not seeming to notice his transgression. "You clearly are not well, at all," she said with a harsher tone. Perhaps she did notice his transgression.

"I think I'm okay, we have history next. I can just sit and rest in that class, then it's lunch time. I'll be all right," he said trying to stand up. He slowly positioned his body into an upright position and followed Lily from the room.

"Sev, you said the f-word to McGonagall!"

"I did?" he sort of remembered but really did not care. He didn't want to whine about how much pain he was in to Lily, but he knew feeling the way he felt, one fallen f-word seemed pretty tame.

"Yeah, my God Sev! You must be more careful, perhaps you should go back to the infirmary?"

"No, I can do this," he said. Lily held his hand down the nearly vacant hall all the way to history class. He squeezed her hand tightly, partly because of the pain and partly because it felt so nice to hold her hand. He felt like she was his girlfriend for a few moments.

He'd never thought of her as anything but his friend until recently. He then surveyed the damage the thought of her being his girlfriend had caused. Was it really worth it? He tenderly rubbed his thumb against her knuckles as they walked even slower than he needed too perhaps and the warm feeling he got from touching her made him think yes, it was worth it.

She let go of his hand right before they reached the class. The butterflies he felt in his stomach were gone in an instant, and replaced by sleep at the monotone dialogue of Professor Binns.

He buried his face in his hands and slept through the entire class. If the ghostly professor noticed, he did not say a word. Severus was awoken by Wilkes who was tapping on his wrists.

"How do you sleep sitting up?" he asked, Severus's book bag in his hands.

"You get used to it when your back melts off, is it lunch time?"

"Yeah, I'll walk with you…"

"No, they said I have to eat in the infirmary. I can walk myself; I'll see you in Charms."

Severus was so hungry he nearly swallowed the potato soup in one gulp and even ate the bacon chunks in it. He had two tuna sandwiches and six biscuits. He drank one whole glass of apple juice and two glasses of milk before letting out a very audible belch.

"Coming from you that is a good sign, appetite is coming back eh?" she asked.

"Yeah Madam Pomfrey, thank God. I think we need to change my shirt," he groaned. He could feel it sticking to him and it was a most unpleasant feeling.

She removed the shirt and in doing so, removed some scabs as well. He winced in pain a few times but was relieved when she rubbed some no-bleed powder on his wounds.

He was in a fresh shirt and running late for Charms. He walked as fast as he could and made his star entrance, again.

"Oh good afternoon Mr. Snape! So good to see you. Take your seat please," Professor Flitwick said pointing to the empty seat in the front that he usually occupied.

Charms were simple that day. There were frogs on their desks; their objective was to levitate them and put them in stasis for two minutes. He wondered if they may dissect them for potions ingredients later but before he could delve deeper into that consideration the class was over.

He did not have to attend broom riding, thank God, so he went back and had more biscuits with Madam Pomfrey.

He was in pain and exhausted as the day wore on. He was determined to complete his entire day and not give up. His last class was Defense and he arrived, forgivingly late and took his seat.

He was so tired and wanting nothing more than to go to sleep that did not pay much attention. Of course, he'd completed the book months ago and there was nothing new in there for him to learn.

The class was a lecture that day and he did doze off. As soon as the class was dismissed he rose to head for the door, not wanting to wait for the halls to thin out. He assumed Lily would walk with him so he was trying to get to her when James Potter had another idea.

"So glad to have you back Snivellus," was all he heard before he felt the hand of James Potter slap him straight across his back. Had he grazed the dead spot Severus would only have been furious and probably thrown a vicious hex his way. Instead he happened upon the tenderest spot, just above the shoulder blades and hit him with such force Severus let out a violent scream before collapsing onto the stone floor.

"Shit James, what did you do?" Sirius asked.

"I didn't think he'd cry like a baby!"

"How could you?" Lily yelled as she ran to his side.

"Mr. Potter, I saw that, ten points from Gryffindor and one week's detention!" The professor said also running to sit near Severus.

Severus lay face down on the floor; his back on fire like it was when the acid initially hit it. The pain was worse than any he'd felt all day and even worse than the cruel massages he was subjected to. It was probably because the hard slap was not expected, even from him. He was crying uncontrollably which caused more pain. He began to choke because he was crying so hard. He did not care that all of the kids were standing around staring at him.

"Come on, let's get you to the infirmary," the professor said helping him up. The hand shaped fire pain on his back was not going away, if anything, it was getting worse. It was almost as if it had awaked some sleeping nerves. His back was throbbing as the halls echoed with the sounds of his sobs. Lily was helping him to the infirmary, which was his only comfort.

When he arrived Madam Pomfrey asked Lily to leave as she scraped his shirt from his bleeding back. He continued to cry as he lay face down on his bed, the normally soothing hands of Madam Pomfrey causing him even more pain and discomfort.

He didn't want to cry, since crying made it hurt more, but as much as he tried, he simply could not stop the flow of tears.

"Why did he do that?" he bawled.

"Shhhh, it's time for your bath sweetie."

"I don't want to."

"I know dear, but you must, come now," she said trying to coax him out of the bed.

He made his way to the over sized tub and got in. The water stung the spot of his back where Potter had slapped him, causing him to continue his weeping.

After thirty minutes she began to scrape off the dead skin and scabs. It usually did not hurt but on that night it was almost unbearable. He put on his underpants and walked to the bed for the rest of the ritual.

She pounded into his back with all her strength as usual as his cries grew louder. Once she was done she sat beside him and used her hand to sweep his sweat filled hair off of his face. He continued to whimper. At that moment, he'd had enough. He just wanted to die. The pain was all encompassing and too much for him to bear any longer. It was not growing better but almost worse with each day.

"Sweetie, do you want to eat?"

"No," he cried, beginning to choke again. "I just want to die."

"Shhh, honey I know. Here take this pain potion…"

"No!" he interrupted.

"Now it's a mild one, it's like a Muggle aspirin, it will just help take the edge off, here," she said coaxing it into his mouth. "There there, good boy. You can have a friend come here if you like, to sit with you and eat with you. He can stay the night too if you wish."

"Really?" he asked, never knowing such a thing was possible.

"Um hm," she said smiling and stroking his hair. "Just let me know who."

His first thought was of Lily. But he knew they'd never allow a girl to sleep in his room. He briefly thought of Lucius but suddenly the words "Remus Lupin," escaped his lips.

"Very well, I'll go get him," she said leaning in and giving him a tiny kiss on the head.

He smiled as much as he could and drifted off to sleep.

AN: Again, pictures will be in my Live Journal (Bamachick73) if you wish to view them, accessed thru the Profile page, I'll update as needed. no new pix for this particular chapter though, but I may post a 'sneak peek' pic for the next one!