He Chose Titans

by masksarehot

Erwin swore he would never again be distracted from his fight against the titans, but when an unexpected bond begins to form with Levi, he must decide whether he will follow his heart or his head. [Erwin x Levi, romance/drama/angst, semi-canon prequel/retelling.]

36. Burn

A/N: Thank you for your lovely comments & messages! I'm so glad people are still enjoying this gigantic fic. I'll keep this chapter's A/N short & sweet because I'm really anxious to get this one up! Thank you everyone for your awesomeness.

And a big shoutout to lady-maverick81 for the lovely pic illustrating part of the cheesy HCT Part IV trailer I posted on Tumblr/Twitter and turning it into something beautiful! It's on my Tumblr under the gift tag and the colouring and atmosphere are just gorgeous! This scene will be coming up soon and I'm really excited to get to it now!

Previous chapter: Levi is sick. Sahlo comes to Trost in a sombre mood, convinced he's about to be killed by one of his many contacts. Erwin & Levi talk a bit about their feelings. Hange gets a titan.

---

-36-

Burn

Levi rapped on Erwin's office door and pushed it open. The Commander sat with his elbows planted on the desk, hands folded over his mouth, staring down at something. Levi padded closer and saw a sealed envelope, a lipstick mark over its flap.

"Sahlo?"

"Most likely, under the guise of Lady Gunnhild again." His voice was strained.

"You think he puts the lipstick on and kisses the envelope himself?" tried Levi.

Erwin didn't move.

Levi frowned. "Why aren't you opening it?"

"It's been less than a week since he was here." Erwin's eyes shifted to him. "He was rather forthcoming about all that was coming to him, and we both ran up against walls trying to extract more. I can't imagine he has much else to add. Besides, we'll be seeing him tomorrow - why bother sending a message?"

"You're talking about Sahlo. He's probably just fucking with your head for the hell of it." Levi folded his arms over his chest. "Bring it with you. The carriage is waiting downstairs."

"Already?" Erwin stood and opened his jacket to slip the envelope into his inner pocket. "You haven't even packed yet."

"My bag is already in the courtyard."

Their gaze held, Erwin's brows pinched with an unasked question. Levi shrugged and added, "I didn't think we were going to share the trunk." Sharing a trunk seemed like something a couple would do.

"I see." Erwin reached for his pen. "Please ask the driver to wait for just a few minutes longer. I just have a couple last-minute instructions for Mike and Dita."

"Not Hange?"

"Hange's rather preoccupied with plans to capture another set of titans."

"Again?"

"Mm," said Erwin, already writing a list.

Levi left him to finish his work. He hoped Hange's experiments were going well - he hadn't seen much of the Squad Leader since the first capture. He had to admit, he missed the constant chatter and poor volume control during mealtimes.

The driver tipped his hat as Levi approached.

"The Commander will be a couple more minutes," said Levi as he stepped into the carriage. He froze, then stepped back out again. Had the cabin space always been that small? How was he supposed to sit that closely to Erwin for hours without things getting awkward?

"Everything all right, Levi?"

He turned to see Erwin approaching, hair glowing golden in the sunlight. Levi's lips flattened. He settled in a corner and folded his arms over his chest.

The Commander didn't seem to notice his discomfort; he told the driver they were ready, then sat on the bench opposite him. He pulled out a file and began to flip through paperwork.

This was how every day had been since their emotional discussion on the tower. Erwin seemed to think they had come to a resolution; Levi felt more impatient than ever. He still had feelings for Erwin, and Erwin still had feelings for him - that should have been enough, but the little spark of hope in his stomach was roaring into a flame, and it was consuming him.

The problem was that he was thinking too much. It had been Mike's fault, laying out their reasons for separation like cards, then shredding them one at a time until only one remained. He had thought that last one had been fear, but Levi had been watching Erwin carefully since then, and fear didn't fit. When Erwin was afraid, his mask went on. He had been warm and open with Levi since their chat, inviting him into his bedroom each night, burning too many bedside candles on good books, reading himself hoarse. The other night, they had even lain awake at two in the morning, giggling over some dumb joke with half-asleep delirium that had erased the punch line from both their minds the next morning.

No, Erwin wasn't afraid. Only one explanation made sense: relief. His feelings for Levi were a distraction, and he was relieved now that they had acknowledged their tension and carefully set it aside until after Wall Maria.

Levi had known all along that he was a distraction; it had been his main reason for instigating their separation in the first place. Then, however, it had been his idea. It was worse when it was Erwin's.

He shifted on the bench, drawing his knees tightly to his chest.

Erwin looked up at him and gave a polite smile. "It's been awhile since you've been to Mitras, Levi. Have you missed it?"

"Not one bit." Levi tried not to notice the Commander's lolling knees. The pants seemed unusually tight around the curves and dips of his thigh muscles; the fabric bunched between them, barely showing the shape of his bulge. He was surprised to find himself aching to crawl into that lap and grind against it. It was this damned carriage, too tiny to contain all the memories that had taken place here.

Erwin's smile faded, but his gaze didn't drop. "Well, it shouldn't be too taxing. I purposefully declined all social invitations; we'll only be focusing on the Council. Although I suspect Sahlo might want to speak with me."

He looked so solemn that Levi said, "Did you open the letter?"

"No."

"You think he's changed his mind about your share of the inheritance?"

Erwin pulled out the envelope. "It's possible. It's also possible this is a death notice." His fingertips drummed the paper.

Levi's lip curled. "Don't tell me you're worried about him."

"Strange, isn't it? After all the grief he put us through."

"He's been screwing us over for four years."

"We did our share of damage to him, too." Erwin's mouth flattened. "I got to know him quite well by the end there - too well. I know very little about any nobles who might take his place. If one of them decides they want to be our opponent rather than our ally, I'll have to start all my tactics and strategies from scratch."

"You love having a problem to solve," said Levi defensively, because he suspected Erwin was more worried about Sahlo's well-being than he was letting on. "Besides, we're so close to Wall Maria. The only things you have to outsmart now are titans." As he said it, he realized how short-sighted he must sound.

But Erwin only said, "I suppose you're right." He flipped the envelope over. "May I borrow your knife?"

Levi pulled the knife out of his boot and handed it over. The blade slid easily through the paper.

Erwin scanned the letter, his frown deepening.

"What?" asked Levi.

"He's inviting me to come to his estate tonight. He wants to speak with me before the meeting." The blue gaze fixed on Levi. "During his visit, he mentioned there were things he was unable to tell me. I wonder if he's had time to think that through, to decide the truth of this world is more valuable to humanity's survival than whatever was stopping him from sharing it?"

"Shouldn't that make you happy?" asked Levi, noting his sombre expression.

"I suppose it should. But it makes me wonder what changed his mind - with a man like Sahlo, an act like this isn't one of sheer benevolence." Erwin folded the letter and slipped it back into his jacket. "I did try to plant seeds in his mind that if he cared about humanity, he would tell me everything he knew. What if he did some soul-searching and realized he needed to share? What if he has information that would prevent us from ever reclaiming the Wall?"

"I don't think that asshole has a soul to search," muttered Levi. With Erwin, it was often difficult to tell if he was having a brilliant hunch, or he was over-thinking things. Given that they were going to be travelling all day, there didn't seem harm in him thinking himself into a fog, if it came to that. It would help him feel better. "Maybe you should brainstorm a bit, come up with some possibilities so you're ready to face him."

"I think I will." The blue gaze was still on him, piercing through him. "What about you, Levi?"

"What?"

"What will you do?"

Levi shrugged. "Just sit here, I guess."

"That might get a bit boring. This trip is surprisingly long if you aren't..." Erwin hesitated. "Killing time."

"Don't make this weird." Too late; Levi was already recalling the ways they used to kill travel time. He rubbed his forehead.

"My apologies." Erwin was using his stiff formal speech, as if he were trying to emphasize the distance between them. "I didn't intend to make things awkward. I am glad we can do this, Levi."

"Do what?"

"Travel comfortably in close quarters like this. I've missed having you along on these trips." Erwin's legs lolled a little wider to either side, as if he were trying to look more casual.

"Yeah," said Levi, trying to ignore the allure of that perfect, muscled lap.

.*.*.*.

Over the next several hours, Levi drifted in and out of sleep. Erwin had long since moved on from brainstorming and was working on documents. Levi decided he should offer to help, but he was so drowsy that he kept falling asleep and dreaming he said the words rather than actually saying them aloud.

The carriage stopped, and he jolted awake.

Erwin looked up, a small smile on his lips. "It's okay. Go back to sleep. We're just at a checkpoint."

That's when he realized they had reached the gate of Ehrmich district. He subtly ran his hand over his chest, feeling for the ring in his breast pocket.

He realized a blue gaze was fixed on his hand.

"What?" asked Levi.

"Everything alright, Levi?"

He thought about lying, but Erwin would see right through him. "This is Ehrmich District, isn't it?"

"Ah," said Erwin quietly.

Their eyes held, then Erwin closed his folder and set it aside. "You must be bored. Why don't we read for a little bit?"

"You brought a book?" asked Levi, surprised. He hadn't expected recreational time to be a big priority during this trip. Anger began to flicker in his chest.

"Of course I did." The thick brows peaked. "Is that unexpected?"

"A bit." The walls of the carriage were beginning to constrict. He tried to take a deep breath. Erwin's cologne, faint as it was, had tainted all the air in the tiny carriage.

"We aren't just colleagues on this trip, Levi. We're still friends." The sentence ended on the wrong tone, as if he were seeking Levi's agreement.

Out. He had to get out. "Forget it."

"Levi?"

"I said, forget it." Levi pulled the stop cord.

Erwin gave a low sigh. "If you would tell me what's wrong-"

"Nothing's wrong. I have to take a shit."

The carriage pulled over and Levi immediately realized his mistake: now he was in a street in Ehrmich in broad daylight. The crowd swarmed around him, couples arm-in-arm, a man tucking a flower behind a woman's ear, a woman laughing at her friend's joke. He ducked into the nearest store in search of a bathroom, because, if nothing else, it would give him a moment of privacy.

He sat on the cold porcelain and took several deep breaths. As much as the air stank in here, at least it didn't smell like Erwin.

The anger faded and left him hollow. He had never felt lonelier than in that carriage: trapped in a box where they had made love dozens of times, travelling through the district that was a symbol of the commitment they had shoved aside. He was tired of pretending they didn't care about each other. And Erwin had the nerve to try to distract him with a book?

Even after he calmed down, it took him a few minutes to drum up the courage to face that carriage again.

When he finally returned, Erwin handed him a thermos. "I took the liberty of getting you some tea."

Levi accepted the offering and opened the cap to smell it. It was high quality tea; he took a sip. The warmth trickled down his throat and glowed in his stomach.

"May I close this?" Erwin reached for the door. "Or too confining?"

"It's fine."

"I know, in the past, confined spaces have made you uncomfortable." Erwin closed it, then sat back in the bench, eyes probing. "But that's not what this is about, is it?"

"Don't pull that mindreading bullshit on me." Levi pulled the cord, alerting the driver they were ready to start moving again.

"I know this isn't easy."

"Seems easy enough to you."

A wounded look flickered across Erwin's face, and Levi immediately felt guilty, but he was too stubborn to apologize.

When the Commander spoke again, his voice was low: "How many years have we known each other, Levi? I would expect you to know by now when I'm overcompensating."

"Just forget it."

Erwin slowly crossed the carriage, bracing his hand against the roof, and dropped to a seat beside him.

"What are you-" began Levi.

Erwin's arms wrapped around him and pulled him in.

Levi stiffened, at first, then slumped against him. Erwin's chest, beneath his cheek. Erwin's heart, pounding against his ear. Levi slid his arms around him, too, and he was shocked by how broad his ribcage was. Was he always this big?

"We're not supposed to touch," he said aloud, and he cringed, because that was the worst possible response.

"I'm sorry, Levi." Erwin pressed his cheek to the top of his head. "Let me lapse for one moment. Just one."

Levi clawed a hand into the back of his shirt, breathing in the scent of his chest. Knowing Erwin was struggling just as much made him feel a little better.

But as nice as the hug felt, a persistent question undercut it: if they were both suffering, why were they still apart?

.*.*.*.

They arrived at the usual hotel late in the afternoon. They stepped inside, walking side-by-side. The front clerk recognized them both and began to check them into their usual suite without even asking which one they wanted. Levi glanced sideways at Erwin and noticed his jaw was tight. He realized he was clenching his jaw, too. The first time they had come here together, they had already been a couple; they had been here every month or two since then, until last fall. It was strange to enter such familiar territory on such new terms. He felt as if he were riding a scouting mission without his gear.

They reached the door. Erwin twisted the key into the lock, then paused for a breath.

The door swung open. Levi's eyes drifted to the bed where they had made love, and the carpet, and the bathtub, and the dresser. And ah, yes, even the closet, that night Levi had drunk too much eggnog at Lord Vasily's winter party.

His feet carried him to the side room. "Mind if I take this room?"

Erwin nodded, jaw still tight.

Levi stepped into the side bedroom and closed the door. Safely sequestered, he began to unpack. He had never opened the closet in the side room before except to spot-check it for cleanliness. It felt wrong to hang his clothes here; they should be hanging next to Erwin's in the main room.

Once they had settled in, Levi moved to the bathroom, washing off the filth of the journey. He checked his chin in the mirror and decided he didn't need a shave until the morning. His undercut was already getting a bit shaggy; he hadn't touched it in a couple weeks.

He found Erwin sitting at the table in the main room, brow furrowed as he stared down at more paperwork. Levi slung himself across the bed, wondering if he was going to end up there that night. They hadn't gone a night without sharing a bed since before Levi had fallen ill, but this place had history.

"I was thinking we might have an early dinner," said Erwin. "Then we'll talk about how we're going to approach my visit with Sahlo this evening."

"Oh?"

Erwin held up the letter. "He wants me to come alone. Given that he believes he's going to die any moment, he may be acting out of desperation, and we can't discount the possibility that this is a trap. I'd like to have you nearby, unseen. I've been to Sahlo's estate before - I'll draw out a map and we'll figure out our strategy."

"Okay." Levi sat up. "No uniform, then?"

"No, let's change into plainclothes." Erwin folded the letter and slipped it back into its envelope. "Do you have any particular food cravings for tonight?"

"Meat," said Levi automatically.

"There's a restaurant near the courthouse that sells a lovely chicken breast platter. It might be expensive."

"I don't care." His money was mostly accumulating in his bank account these days, anyway. The only times he had ever gone out had been with Erwin.

They left the room a short while later, dressed in dark pants and collared shirts. It was a warm night, and Erwin took off his suit jacket, slinging it over his shoulder. He looked unnaturally handsome, and Levi found himself proud to be walking alongside him.

They settled into the restaurant, and for a while, Levi was able to pretend everything was normal between them. They talked about past missions and strategy - all unclassified topics, of course - and Erwin filled in Levi on some of the drama among their investment partners.

"How are things with Nile?" asked Levi when the conversation slowed.

Erwin fell silent.

"You haven't talked to him since you tried to fuck Marie, huh?"

"Not anything outside the realm of business," said Erwin, letting the provocative phrasing slide right over him. "He's still understandably miffed. Though now that we know Sahlo was bluffing all along, I suppose there's no need to pretend I was interested in Marie at all, is there?"

"Probably not." Levi hoped they would patch things up. Nile was pathetic, but he could take a constant stream of abuse and still keep his chin up, and he had a subtle sense of humour that verged on bitterness. And Marie had a strong spirit that always left him feeling good about himself after their visits.

Erwin was still lost in thought. "Then again, it is probably best that Nile and I show some distance. Sahlo may be out of the picture, but there may be others who would be willing to use him and his family against me."

Levi studied him, realizing, for the first time, that losing Sahlo might mean Erwin pushing away everyone near him. As awful as Sahlo had been, he was easier to read than a complete unknown. "Huh."

"Not much room for friendship in this role. That's one thing I didn't expect when I dreamed of becoming Commander." Erwin stared down at his meal. "Or rather, I didn't expect it to bother me."

Levi nodded at it. "Keep eating, or it'll go cold."

"Mm."

"You always forget to eat when you're stressed." The food was delicious; he took another mouthful himself.

Erwin poked at the food with his fork. "Levi, about what happened in the carriage-"

The chicken in Levi's mouth was suddenly too dry; he chugged a sip of water so he could reply. "Don't talk about it."

"Is that what you want?" asked Erwin. "If you want to pretend it didn't happen, I'll respect your decision, but I'd like to understand why you were upset."

"You know exactly why I was upset," said Levi, and that was the end of the conversation.

.*.*.*.

After they returned to the hotel room, Erwin sat on the bed with his notebook. "Let's go over the plan."

On the bed? Levi glanced at the empty table and chairs. He sat on the bed next to his Commander, leaning in close, but not actually touching.

"Sahlo lives on a large manor in a sparsely populated area just east of Mitras." Erwin sketched a quick map with a stick of graphite. "A thick, vine-covered fence surrounds the yard." Somehow, his vines actually looked like vines. Levi always enjoyed watching him draw; he wished he would do it more often. Drawing probably reminded him too much of Henrik.

"How high?" he asked.

"About two metres. There's a gated driveway here," continued Erwin, drawing a long, curving path into the centre of the property. "A security guard watches the gate, and others patrol the fence. There's nothing but vast green space in-between the fence and the building, with very few hills. It's nearly impossible to reach the house undetected. If we want to ensure you're near the building, you'll have to be in the carriage with me. Unfortunately, if I'm supposed to come alone, I doubt the security guard will allow you inside."

Levi leaned a bit closer, enjoying their proximity. "What if I hide in a box or under a blanket?"

Erwin gave him a wary glance. "Given your dislike of confined spaces, I can't imagine that would be comfortable."

Levi shuddered as he considered it thoroughly. And in a carriage, no less. "Good point. What if I lie flat along the top? There are roof racks on most of the carriages around here, aren't there?"

"Your silhouette would be very noticeable against the street lamps."

Levi felt a swell of frustration. "You're approaching this like we're storming an enemy base, but this is Sahlo. He's weak and paranoid. He's probably hiding under his desk in a puddle of his own piss."

"Then let's just say I'm afraid of crossing paths with the people who might be out to get him." Erwin tapped the gate. "You could wait outside the complex altogether.

"I'm not leaving you alone in there."

After a pause, Erwin said, "Hm."

"Hm?"

"You could be the driver."

"That could work," said Levi. "It's no different than driving a cart, right?"

"Most likely, but there's a catch: if, for some reason, you needed to leave the carriage to intervene, we risk losing our mode of transportation back to the city. Don't forget, these aren't Survey Corps horses. They haven't been bred to wait patiently without a rider like ours have - they need careful instructions. Besides, if there are attackers there, they might take an unattended carriage to cut off our escape route."

"So you'd want me to stay with the carriage."

"Unless it was an absolute emergency, yes."

"Fine." Levi swung his legs over the side of the bed and stood. "You know, after all this planning, he's just going to want to invite you in for a cup of tea and ramble on about the future of his failing yeast product."

"I hope you're right." Erwin stared blankly down at the notebook, his brows furrowed.

.*.*.*.

Levi wore the closest thing he could find to a driver's uniform: a black suit and pants.

"Here." Erwin pulled a wide-brimmed hat with white trim out of his trunk.

Levi eyed it. "I don't like hats."

"It'll help disguise you."

"You just happened to have this with you?"

"I suspected we might need to do some infiltration."

Levi eyed it for another second, then slammed it onto his head. He purposefully avoided looking at the mirror as he strode to the door.

They requisitioned a military carriage, but no driver.

"Zackly's going to wonder about that," said Levi.

"We can explain it to him later. And Sahlo's pursuers won't find out until we've already visited the property."

"If he actually has pursuers."

Erwin looked thoughtful. "I suppose we'll see."

The sun had already set by the time they set out. Just as well; darkness would help conceal Levi's identity. He pulled a thick blanket over his legs as he drove, trying to give the illusion he was taller. He couldn't help thinking if he were normal sized, he would be less conspicuous.

The horses easily responded to Levi's commands, but they did require frequent corrections compared to Survey Corps horses. Independence probably wasn't valued as much within the Capital.

He mentally followed the instructions Erwin had given him before they left. Unlike the Underground, Mitras was structured around a numbered grid, so it was easy to navigate his way around. As they approached the city limits, the blocks began to lengthen; the houses grew larger, with sprawling lawns between them. Soon there were no visible homes at all, just walls of fences and hedges as long as full blocks had been in the city. Trees hung over the road, their leaves glowing orange in the lamplight. Did some poor sap come and light all the lamps by hand each night? Planters hung from the lamps, overflowing with blooming flowers. Levi's nose wrinkled. I wonder how much water they waste on this bullshit while the Underground drinks mud and sewer-water. Sahlo had always claimed to want to help the Underground. Had he ever looked at all his own excess and felt guilty? Levi doubted it.

Sahlo's driveway was marked with a marble slab that looked like an old, worn tombstone. Levi slowed the carriage and rode up the driveway to a tall set of gates. The hair on the back of his neck rose as a security guard approached them.

"Commander Erwin Smith of the Survey Corps," said Levi in his most respectable voice. "The Commander has an appointment with Lord Martin Sahlo for eight o'clock."

The security guard held up a lamp. Levi bowed his head, shielding his face with the brim of his hat.

After several seconds, the security guard said, "I'm afraid Lord Sahlo requires all guests to disembark from their private carriages here."

"What?" said Levi, dropping to his normal tone of voice.

"Special orders. I do apologize for the trouble. We have a buggy on the other side of the gates that will escort the Commander up to the estate."

"That's bullshit," said Levi. "The Commander is an important man, and I've been entrusted with his safety."

"What seems to be the problem, driver?"

Levi turned to see the Commander stepping out the carriage, his shoulders thrown back, chin high. He knew Erwin exuded confidence in official situations, but moments like this still always made his breath catch.

The security guard must have been intimidated, because he shrank into himself, stammering, "Lord Sahlo has insisted all visitors approach his estate alone."

Erwin gave the long pause he gave when he was pacing through several alternatives to make a decision. He lifted his chin a little higher, staring down his nose at the guard. "I see. My driver and carriage can wait here?"

"Of course."

"Erwi-" began Levi.

The Commander's sharp gaze landed on him. "I'll need my file out of the lockbox in the back, driver."

They moved to the back of the carriage. Erwin selected a random file, keeping up the pretense. Then he held out a hand and whispered, "I shouldn't go in there unarmed. I need your knife."

"Forget the knife. You're not going in there at all. It feels like a trap."

"If this is a trap, someone is going to a lot of trouble. I want to know who and why."

"Erwin-"

"Levi, your knife." The tone of his voice made it an order.

This was already stretching on too long for a simple file retrieval from a lockbox. With a sigh, Levi pulled the knife out of his boot and handed it over.

"Wait at the end of the driveway," whispered Erwin, "ready to leave in a hurry, if needed." He slipped the knife into his sleeve and strode toward the guard.

The gates opened.

Levi settled into the driver's seat, watching as Erwin stepped into a small buggy. The guard lit a lamp on the front, then began to drive the horses. In the distance, Levi could see the manor house; its windows glowed, warm and inviting.

Maybe Sahlo really is just being paranoid.

He settled deeper into the seat, eyes locked on the buggy's lamp as it moved closer and closer to the house.

.*.*.*.

The buggy stopped. Erwin adjusted his sleeves, feeling the cold blade of Levi's knife against his forearm.

The door opened. The night air felt too thick. Perhaps it was instinct, honed after years on the field of battle; everything was a little too still, a little too stiff.

"Sorry for the hassle, sir." The guard gave him a military salute. He didn't look old enough to be ex-military, and his posture didn't indicate any type of injury. Was Sahlo hiring plainclothes Military Police? He really is spooked.

Erwin clutched his random file tightly, as if it were an important document, and moved toward the door. He reached out for the bell cord, but stopped when he heard the horses moving behind him. The guard was already ignoring him, leading the buggy further down the driveway.

Taking advantage of his distraction, Erwin slipped through the door unannounced.

The architecture of Sahlo's manor house was old-fashioned, with stone columns and patterned brickwork, and faded tapestries hung from the walls, some appearing to be older than the Walls themselves. Erwin had only been here a few times before, and the grandeur of the building was always intimidating, but this time, he felt a cold twist in the depth of his stomach. It took him a moment to identify what was wrong: the scent of kerosene was far stronger than usual. It was possible a wary Sahlo was keeping more of his home lit than usual, but Erwin's instincts told him that wasn't the case.

He eyed the carpeted stairway up to the next floor, where Sahlo's study was. No, he wasn't going to strand himself on the second floor until he was sure his surroundings were safe. He paced forward.

Just before he reached the front room, voices sounded from the upper floor. Neither of them were Sahlo's.

Erwin's teeth clenched. He quickly returned to the front door, but paused, peering through the window beside it.

The security guard was speaking with a short man he didn't recognize. Erwin couldn't hear what they were saying, but their gestures were agitated.

They consider me hostile. Erwin pressed his back against the door. His options were to go through them and use the knife, or try to escape through another exit. He hurried toward the front room, knowing that beyond it lay a dining room with a low balcony.

This room was dark, but the scent of kerosene was stronger. His eyes weren't adjusted to the dimness, and he felt his way forward, using the wall as his guide. A low side table hit his shins, and he winced.

This was far more dangerous than he had anticipated. He should have listened to his instincts, to Levi's. He should have taken Sahlo's paranoia more seriously.

His eyes were adjusting now.

"Commander Erwin?" boomed a voice with a thick Underground accent. "You're sure?"

Shit.

A woman's voice spoke next, too low to hear.

The man's voice spoke again: "Well, maybe you should have taken out Lord Shitface in Trost like you were supposed to."

"I told you," said the woman, voice getting closer, "he was always surrounded by too many people."

Erwin clenched his jaw and ducked behind the couch. There was a window behind him. Maybe he could open it and slip through before he was detected. He felt for a latch, then realized the window was sealed. He would have to break it. Maybe there was something heavy nearby.

"Fuck it," drawled the man. "Let's finish cleaning up this mess."

Light flickered, then illuminated the room. Erwin pressed against the back of the couch, controlling his breaths.

"Well?" said the man, very close. "Where the hell is he?"

"Maybe he went upstairs and found Sahlo," said the woman.

"How the fuck would he do that, shit-for-brains? We came down the staircase."

"Maybe he flew," she said dryly, and the man laughed.

Erwin formulated his escape: a single punch to break the glass, a kick to make a hole big enough to escape through, and a dive through it, all before the pair realized where he was. He gritted his teeth and carefully tugged his empty sleeve over his fist.

"He's a big guy, right?" said the man. "Big and tall? Now where would a big guy hide in this room?"

Erwin began to drive his fist toward the window, but froze mid-punch as he heard a click by his ear. Metal tapped his temple.

"Should've sent your short friend, Commander," said the man's voice. "He could've fit into a vase, or scurried up the chimney like a fucking squirrel." He blasted a short laugh, as if he had amused himself with the image. "Get up."

Erwin slowly turned his head. He recognized the man: tall, bearded, flat-brimmed hat. Sahlo's babysitter.

"I'm not a threat to you," said Erwin calmly.

The side of the muzzle tapped against his temple again. "Get up."

He rose to his feet. He wondered if that unusual gun was from the collection Sahlo had been gathering for Rage Klein, or if it was military. His eyes shifted to the man's companion, and a brow rose. He recognized her from the pub in Trost during Sahlo's visit: the attractive blond Levi had pointed out to him, the one who vaguely reminded him of his sister. She eyed him, looking bored.

The tall man cocked his head at the file. "That for his lordship?"

Erwin glanced down and saw that he had, in his haste, grabbed a file containing his list of personal shopping and errands he had intended to do while in Mitras. "Yes."

"Do you have an appointment?" The man had an unnerving grin that showed two sets of yellowed teeth.

Erwin couldn't read him; he was either unstable or toying with him. Perhaps both. "Yes."

"Well, then, we should get the man to his appointment!" The tall man waved the gun. "His lordship is upstairs in his study."

Erwin scanned the area as they walked, looking for an escape, but the gun was still pressed against his skull. Just as well; he wasn't sure he could fight off these two, anyway. That time in the alley, when Erwin had held a knife to Sahlo's throat, the tall man had appeared behind him as quietly and formlessly as if he was smoke.

If Levi were here, the fight would already be over. If only there was a way to signal him...

As they climbed the stairs, the tall man yanked the file out of Erwin's hand and opened it. "...the hell? This some sort of code?"

The woman leaned over to take a look. "Suit measurements; no wonder you didn't recognize them."

"Not a code?"

"No, they're reasonable. His, by the looks of it. And that appears to be a list of popular fiction books below it."

In his periphery, Erwin saw the tall man giving him a confused sneer. He couldn't think of a good excuse, so he said nothing.

The scent of kerosene was so strong on the second floor that Erwin felt dizzy. His heart beat in his throat.

"Nasty oil spill," he said aloud. "Lord Sahlo should hire a new lamplighter."

"Good idea," said the woman. "We'll add it to the shopping list you're giving him."

The massive double doors at the end of the hallway were propped open. Sahlo's chair was turned to face the window, his greying hair just barely showing over the top of the high back.

"Go ahead." The tall man shoved Erwin into the room, training his gun on him. "Talk to him."

Erwin paced toward the desk. Sahlo's office was a mess. The drawers had been thrown open, papers littering the floor. The bookshelves were almost empty, books lying in piles at the base. He could smell the oil in here, too. I hope they aren't planning on setting me on fire with everything else. He eyed the window, wondering how far the drop on the other side was. Levi's knife wasn't much use against guns - or maybe it would be in Levi's hands, but Erwin wasn't quick enough.

"Lord Sahlo," he said, even though he knew it was futile.

No response. No movement. He gripped the back of the chair and turned it.

He had seen hundreds of dead bodies during his time in the Survey Corps, maybe even over a thousand. But they had been soldiers on the field. Sahlo had been safely sequestered in Mitras, far from the front lines. With all his political maneouvring and machinations, he had seemed invincible. Now he stared at nothing with clouded eyes, his head lolling at an unnatural angle. His neck and chest were stained with old blood, and his skin was grey in some places, dark purple in others.

Erwin forgot about the window, forgot about Levi waiting in the carriage, even forgot about the pair standing behind him. Sahlo's face looked peaceful, but maybe it was just slack. Why was he sitting on the chair? Had he been moved here after his death, or had he sat calmly, accepting his fate?

He heard footsteps behind him. In the window's reflection, he could see the tall man and the woman standing behind him, guns trained on him.

Erwin closed his eyes for a moment to steady himself. It was no accident he was here. He made a plausible guess:

"Why did you invite me here?"

"Oh-ho," said the tall man. "They said you were clever."

At the voice, he remembered he was supposed to be looking for an escape route. The darkness made it difficult to gauge the drop to the ground outside the window. He tried to recall past visits here. Sahlo was a fan of theatrical delivery; Erwin surely would have seen him staring dramatically across the yard, arms clasped behind his back for effect. He tried to visualize it. How far below him had the ground been then?

"Check the letter," said the woman.

It took Erwin a moment to notice the blood-stained letter on the floor next to the body. He picked it up and pulled out a document: a revised will, leaving no money to Erwin. The writing appeared to be Sahlo's, but Erwin knew how easily documents could be forged with the right contacts. He turned to face his attackers. "I see. You're setting me up."

"Seems to me you have a pretty strong motive to kill this asshole," said the tall man. "Seems to me he wanted to cut you out of his will. You needed those funds to get to Wall Maria, so you snapped. You've been under a lot of pressure these past few years, haven't you?"

Erwin stood tall, eyeing their guns. "I don't have a reputation as a man who snaps."

"Your file says different."

Erwin's heart beat in his throat. "My file shows impeccable performance."

"Not your military file. Our file." The man bared both sets of teeth again. "846. Squad Leader Mike Zacharias got his nose broken. Ringing any bells?"

Erwin used all his focus to keep his face neutral. How could the tall man possibly have known about his breakdown while Levi and Hange were missing? The Survey Corps had gone to great lengths to keep it a secret; not even Zackly knew about it. Not even Sahlo.

"Or how 'bout the time you and your little pal Levi went below the surface last year? Four bodies." The tall man whistled. "That doesn't sound like impeccable performance to me, Commander. Sounds like you're a dangerous, unstable fellow. And the way you keep getting our spies gobbled up by titans, you're starting to piss me off."

Spies? What other groups would be keeping an eye on the Survey Corps? Perhaps scanning troop communications hadn't been as unnecessary as Erwin had thought.

"Are you going to kill me?" he asked calmly.

"Nah, we're just trying to provide a little guidance so you make smart choices in the future. Here's what comes next." The man stepped closer. "My friends and me, we're gonna burn this house to the ground, but leave your buddy over there and his new will in good shape, good enough for the MP to trace to you if we need them to. You're going to get the fuck out of here and ignore every secret this bloated weasel ever told you. You're going to fall into line so this isn't the way you die, too. No more blackmailing lords, no more stealing the King's gold, none of that shit. Play by the rules and you won't get hurt. Got it?"

That's it? They invited me out here just to scare me while they were taking care of Sahlo? "You're letting me leave?"

"Yeah, shoo. We've got bigger fish to fry."

He still couldn't tell who they worked for - were they agents of the King? Of the Wallists? Or just hired goons from Sahlo's investors? They seemed too knowledgeable for that. If it came down to his word against theirs, he doubted he could shout louder than them.

He avoided looking at Sahlo's body as he walked to the door. He could feel the pair's guns trained on him; he half-expected them to shoot him in the back.

Now he could see other colleagues of theirs putting kegs in each doorway, labelled "yeast". They glanced up at Erwin, shocked.

"Let him leave," said the man's voice behind him. "He'll play nice now."

The kegs shifted to the side to make room for Erwin to pass. He walked calmly to the exit and stepped into the yard.

.*.*.*.

Levi watched the front of the house with suspicion. The buggy that had carried Erwin to the door still hadn't returned to the gate; instead, it had travelled further up the driveway. He had thought, at first, that it was following a loop to turn around, but the light had winked out just past the house. That had been a good ten minutes ago. Maybe the guard was waiting to bring Erwin back when he was done, but why would he leave the gate unattended? None of this added up.

"Fuck it," he muttered, and he began to guide the horses up the driveway.

He had only closed about a third of the distance when an explosion shook the air.

He barely caught a glimpse of flames licking up the side of the house; the horses began to bolt.

"Shit," he said under his breath, trying to stay calm - the horses would sense his fear. They careened off the driveway, moving so quickly that they were outrunning the lamp. A tree whipped past them. Several other explosions sounded behind them.

Levi clamped the hat onto his head so he didn't lose it. Shit! He gently pulled the horses back toward the driveway, trying to guide them in a circular motion to calm them. The city carriage had a hard time negotiating the lawn; it began to tip further, further... It was going to tip over completely if he didn't intervene. He released the hat and used both hands on the reins, desperate to regain control.

They reached the driveway again, and the carriage righted.

Sweat trailed down Levi's temple. His forearms ached. The horses ran back toward the gate, but they were moving in unison now. Gingerly, he tried to slow them.

The horses responded.

They came to a stop just inside the security gate. Levi twisted until he could see the house. The entire building was in flames; the roof had already collapsed in the eastern wing.

Erwin! He hitched the horses to the gate, ignoring his orders. There was no point in having the carriage ready to go if Erwin was trapped in a burning building. His heart pounded in his throat as he sprinted up the driveway.

About halfway up the driveway, a figure was running toward him, unidentifiable in the darkness. Levi darted to the side of the road and crouched down. The figure slowed, too.

"Levi?"

Relief washed over him. "Come on."

He was fast, but Erwin's legs were long; they ran in unison toward the gate. Erwin leapt into the driver's seat as Levi undid the hitch. He swung into place beside Erwin as the horses began to move.

"Are you okay?" asked Levi.

"Yeah. You?"

"Yeah."

"The horses are sweating," said Erwin, slowing their pace.

"They bolted when the first explosion cooked off." Levi paused. "I lost your hat."

"Ah, well." Erwin turned the horses onto a side street and slowed them to a walk. The only light here was from their lamp; this must be a throughway for servants or delivery vehicles.

"Sahlo's dead," said Levi. "Isn't he."

The Commander was very quiet.

"If you're going to tell me what happened, you'd better do it now, because we're going to reach the city soon, and people are going to be able to overhear. And you smell like kerosene."

"Do I?" Erwin grimaced. "Some of Sahlo's friends are cleaning up his business ties. I believe they invited me to scare me. They've planted evidence to make it look like I killed him, and they threatened to use that against me if I don't fall in line. Then they let me leave."

"Fall in line how?"

"I don't know. They seemed like they might be Military Police, but they weren't in uniform, and the leader sounded like he was from the Underground. Maybe Rage hired MP mercenaries?" Erwin's brows were low, his gaze fixed straight ahead. "They knew things they shouldn't have, like the fact that we acquired some of the King's gold."

"Sahlo probably told them."

"They also knew I attacked Mike." Erwin turned to look at him, still wearing that intense gaze. "Only a handful of us knew that. They claimed to have planted a series of spies at the base."

Levi felt winded. "Did they know about us?"

"If they did, they didn't mention it."

The words should have made Levi breathe easier, but Erwin's face showed no relief.

They returned the carriage to the military yard. As they walked back toward the hotel, Erwin massaged the bridge of his nose with his fingers.

"You okay?" asked Levi again.

"I suppose there's no point in establishing an alibi. The military records clearly show we had a carriage out around the time of the incident. I suppose I'll have to play by the rules for a little while. I can't shake the feeling Sahlo was shielding me more than I thought - I wonder if I'm going to become a target now that he's gone?"

"Anyone who wants to get to you will have to go through me first."

Erwin gave him a genuine smile. "That's no small comfort. Thank you, Levi."

They returned to the hotel room. Levi pulled off his shoes and set them neatly by the wall, then sat on the bed. He watched as Erwin hovered by the door.

"What is it?"

"Sahlo was holding a doctored will that cut me out of the funds. It was excellent work. It must have been one of Leona's - I need to speak with her to make sure. If it we can't confirm it was a forgery, then we may be setting ourselves up for trouble down the road if we take Sahlo's inheritance." He still hadn't taken off his shoes.

"Now? It's late."

Erwin let out a low sigh. "I have to do something."

So Sahlo's death was bothering him more than he was letting on. In the old days, Levi could have distracted him with sex. "Maybe you should just shower off that kerosene smell and we can read in bed for a bit. It'll be safer to head to the Underground in daylight."

With another low sigh, Erwin nodded. He bent down to pull off his shoes. "I do feel my head is muddled at the moment. Perhaps a good night's sleep will clear it."

Once they had finished cleaning up for the night, they settled into the main bed in their pajama bottoms. Erwin propped a pillow behind his head and began to read. Levi lay on his side, watching. He never grew tired of watching the broad lips speak, the flashes of perfect white teeth behind them, the little tug down on the tip of his nose when he pronounced certain sounds.

The story itself was mediocre - a tale of half-baked political intrigue set against an aristocratic backdrop. It seemed all these types of books followed the same basic plotline: a character fought against the social norm for awhile, but ultimately ended up happier when they embraced it. Levi recognized it as propaganda, but the predictability of the stories was part of the reason they were so relaxing to read. He had enough unpredictability and realistic drama in his everyday life.

After about half an hour, his eyelids were drooping. A long pause caught his attention. When he opened his eyes, the Commander was staring at him with a soft smile.

"Tired," mumbled Levi.

"It is getting a bit late," agreed Erwin, setting the book aside. "Did you want to stay here, or return to your own room?"

"You already know the answer to that," said Levi, but then he paused. "Unless you need space."

"No. I think company is good for me right now." He leaned across to extinguish the lamp.

Levi closed his eyes and rolled onto his back, trying to get comfortable again now that he was fully awake. This particular bed was always a bit too soft. He dropped his arms to the side.

A brush of skin. Their hands were touching again. He froze.

He became aware of Erwin's breaths, a little too long, a little too deep. The bed just barely shifted, and even though Levi couldn't be sure, he was pretty confident those massive thighs were flexing.

Don't, he told himself, but he was already reaching out his little finger, crossing it over Erwin's - a small bit of contact. A harmless invitation.

He heard Erwin swallow, felt himself do the same. Why were they holding back anymore? Why were they apart, with Sahlo dead, the rumours nonexistent? He was lightheaded.

Erwin's voice was too low: "Levi." An admonition.

He flinched and pulled away. "Guess I was half-asleep." He rolled onto his side, facing away, hoping his pounding heart wasn't audible from the other side of the bed. There was a long pause, so long that he thought that was the end of it. Then he felt the bed shift.

"Levi, if I've been observed closely enough that my attack on Mike is documented, then there's a good chance they know about our history, too. Whoever these people are, they're dangerous. Organized. Trained."

"It doesn't matter," muttered Levi.

"What?"

"It doesn't matter how much they know. I'm your best pressure point, even if things had always been platonic between us. They know I'm your right-hand man; if I don't attend events with you, people begin to question it. And anyone who's figured out where I came from thinks I'm your pet project. So what does it matter if we're fucking or not?"

"You underestimate the depths people would go to," said Erwin, his tone calm and measured. "Our romance was never sanctioned by the military; it was a breach of protocol, and that could be twisted into treason. I won't see you hanging from a noose because of my-" He stopped.

"Your what?" said Levi, humiliation beginning to warp into anger. "Your lapse in judgement? Your weakness? I thought we were equals when the uniforms came off."

"I misspoke."

"Well, it doesn't matter, anyway, because it already happened." Levi rolled onto his back again. "We were together for three and a half fucking years. Holding back now doesn't magically undo that." His voice caught, and he cursed himself for showing emotion. Erwin listened to logic, not emotion.

"I thought we came to an agreement in the tower," said Erwin. "We weren't going to rekindle anything until after Wall Maria, so we could stay focused."

"Well, maybe you're not breaking down as much now, but..." Levi's voice caught again. "I am. Seems we traded one for the other. And you've gotta be the one using your brain more, so maybe it's not so bad if I'm the one suffering. But if you're suffering like I am, that's twice the suffering. So I need to know..." He took a steadying breath. "Have you been breaking down at all, the way you did when we were together?"

After a long pause, Erwin said, "No."

Levi's stomach dropped. "Oh." His hands clawed into the mattress. "Does that mean you're better off if we never..." He couldn't bring himself to suggest it.

The silence was even longer this time.

"Erwin." He hated not seeing him, hated trying to guess what the silences meant. He reached across to his bedside table and lit the lamp.

When he turned to face Erwin again, he saw him with his hand shielding his eyes, his cheeks damp.

Levi sat up. "What the hell? You're crying?"

"A little."

"You said you weren't breaking down!"

Erwin wiped his face with the back of his hand. "It's not much longer now, Levi. We're so close to the Wall, and if we can just stay focused-"

"Bullshit."

"-we can plan the best possible strategy and come out the other end alive, and then-"

"Bullshit! Fucking knock it off." Levi leaned over him. "Tell me what's really going on."

Erwin sighed and closed his eyes. "Levi-"

"No more bullshit."

Erwin's throat bobbed, and he looked away. His voice was small: "I'm terrified."

Levi's breath caught. Mike was right. "Because you're worried what will happen if one of us dies."

"I've taken huge risks before, but I've never had huge consequences until recently. Those consequences don't land on me, where they belong, but on those around me instead." The blue eyes locked on Levi, so cold that he shivered. "Think of all the trauma you've had to endure in the past year- No, it starts earlier than that, with your friends Farlan and-"

"We agreed my choices were going to be my own. I'm the one offering my own heart, and that's my decision, not yours."

"The odds were different back then."

Levi's lip curled. "It doesn't matter."

"It does matter. What they did to my sister's husband, Levi... What they did to Sahlo..." Erwin's gaze grew distant, and for the first time, Levi recognized that he had been traumatized by what he had seen in the lord's home. Instead of concern, he felt anger.

"You're looking for excuses. Fear's never stopped you from anything before."

"It's not just that I'm afraid," said Erwin quietly. "If we do rekindle our relationship, it needs rebuilding. I want to do that properly, when we have time and focus to be each other's priority."

Levi snorted. "More bullshit. We're never going to be each other's priority."

"After Wall Maria-"

"-we'll be pushing outside the walls. We agreed from the beginning that the titans would always come first. That's how we work." He was getting angrier with every word, and he should probably stop, but the words kept coming. "No more excuses. You're pushing me away because our relationship is the one thing you can control."

"What do you mean?" Erwin asked, and there was a note of danger in his voice, but Levi didn't back down.

"You've lost Sahlo, so you lost any control you had over the interior. You're worried about Wall Maria, because no one really has any control over how that's going to go, not really. Even Nile isn't willing to do you favours anymore. So you're controlling the one thing you can: you're keeping me at arm's length. The only reason we're apart right now is because you're a fucking control freak." Awful, he felt awful, but at the same time, it felt good to lash out.

The Commander stared at him for a moment, mouth open a crack. Then his brows dropped. He stood and strode to the closet, whipping the door open. It slammed against the wall; Levi jumped.

Erwin yanked a dress shirt off a hanger. "I'm not sure what you're hoping to accomplish with this conversation, Levi, but you can't bully someone into being with you." He pulled off his pajama pants and pulled on a pair of black pants. "And if you think belittling me is going to endear you to me-"

"Where are you going?" interrupted Levi. Realization hit him. "You aren't going to the Underground now. It's the middle of the fucking night."

"This is the best time to do it. I'll pose as a nobleman looking for a sex worker." He pulled on his shoes.

"You're going to get yourself killed."

"I need to know if Leona was involved in Sahlo's forgery." Erwin turned to face him, hands in his jacket pockets. "You stay here."

"Don't be stupid. You need protection."

"That didn't work so well last time."

The words punched Levi in the gut, winded him. Their gaze held, then Erwin turned and marched for the door.

Levi's voice still wasn't working; he leapt out of bed and scrambled to the door, intercepting him before he could open it.

"Move," said Erwin, hand still on the door knob.

He found his voice. "You're storming off to make me feel guilty. That's manipulative as hell. I'm not going to sit around worrying about you while you smugly storm off to your death."

After a moment, Erwin released the doorknob, his face softening. "I know it's manipulative. But I genuinely do want to speak with Leona before we see the Council tomorrow. It's been eating away at me since I saw the modified will."

"We've never really fought like this before."

"No." Erwin looked sombre. "I can't say I'm fond of it."

"No," agreed Levi softly. "This is fucking awful."

Their eyes held.

"The real reason I don't want you to come with me is because you're too recognizable," said Erwin. "I shouldn't have brought up what happened last time. That was low."

"Well, it was true."

Erwin's jaw quivered a little. "Shall we continue our conversation after we've had time to calm down? Maybe we can talk about our fears and issues rationally instead of slinging insults at each other."

"Yeah."

Their eyes were still holding. Erwin's throat bobbed. Slowly, slowly, he bent down. His lips pressed to Levi's forehead, warm and damp. The words, "I'm sorry," fluttered against his skin.

"Yeah, me, too."

Erwin stood upright. "I'm going to use the entrance by the market. I'll be going straight to Leona's place. I should only be about an hour."

"You really have to do this?"

"I have to do something."

Levi remembered the trauma in his eyes, and this time, he felt concern. "I'll be here." He stepped aside, opening the door for him.

Erwin held his gaze for a moment longer, then stepped into the hall.

.*.*.*.

The guard at the entrance stepped forward, burly arms crossed over his chest.

"August Adler," said Erwin, flashing fake papers, because Sahlo had been the only person he had needed to hide that pseudonym from - as far as he knew, anyway. And if anyone already knew about August, then they probably knew all his other secrets, too.

"Damned late to be heading Underground, Mr. Adler," said the man as he read the document.

"A man's needs have no fixed schedule." The words tasted of mud and left a thick film in his mouth.

The guard nodded and let him pass.

Erwin strode down the stairs, chin high. At the base of it, a group of provocatively dressed people whistled and called out to him, trying to draw his attention. He pushed through them and marched toward Leona's house.

The lights were out, and for a moment he thought he smelled kerosene. He knocked, anticipating the worst.

A light went on in the bedroom, then travelled toward the door. He couldn't smell kerosene at all now. He let out a slow breath, feeling his body relax.

The door slat slid open, and then he heard Leona mutter, "What in the three Walls-?"

The door swung open.

She was thinner than he remembered, and her clothes were dirty and tattered. Her smile, however, was as warm as ever.

"What are you doing here?" She glanced up and down the street.

"I wasn't followed. May I come in?"

"Yes, of course."

They settled in the kitchen; she brought him a cup of tea and then sat across from him with a cup of her own.

"It's been awhile," she said. "I was beginning to think I'd never see you again."

"Sahlo is dead."

Her eyes widened for a moment, but then she smiled pleasantly. "That's good news for you, isn't it?"

"I know you were working with him, Leona."

She shrugged. "I saw a lot of clients over the years."

"I suppose money is more important than loyalty."

She laughed. "Are you going to give me a lecture on moral choices, Erwin? I've made a living circumventing the law - something you've done more than your fair share of yourself. Then, at the end of the day, you go back to your guaranteed room and board while the rest of us struggle for scraps."

He frowned. "I know what Sahlo meant to you and the other residents of the Underground. I know the work he was trying to do to keep everyone fed under the name Lord Hasek. I would have been happy to increase your payment, if money was the only issue."

"It's more complicated than that." She leaned closer. "The Klein family has always dominated this segment of town. They have for generations. Independent businesses like me don't do so well unless we ally with the Kleins. And Rage and Hasek were in each other's pockets from the beginning, so being loyal to Rage meant being loyal to Hasek." Her brow furrowed. "I don't know what's going to go on with the food situation here now that Hasek's gone. Both his food supply and the extra money and weapons he was supposed to be bringing in are gone, and that yeast thing he was working on is a bust, too."

"I know. I was helping him with all that."

Her face softened. "I know."

"I've been cut off from my means to help feed people, too: Sahlo originally left a quarter of his estate for me, and the Survey Corps was to use those funds to reclaim Wall Maria. Today, I saw an updated version of the will that wrote me out entirely. Were you approached by anyone to make a fake will for Sahlo?"

"Yeah. Figured his time was up when that happened." She eyed him. "Can I ask you something, Erwin? Friend to friend."

"Of course."

"Is there any chance the Underground is going to see one bit of the food that floods these walls once we have Wall Maria back?"

He stirred his tea and took a long sip, considering. When he set it back down, he said, "I don't anticipate Levi standing for anything less. He still has a soft spot for the Underground."

She raised a brow. "Is that so?"

"He's not well liked here, is he?"

"There were some who admired him. Others who hated him. Just like anyone else here, it depends who you talk to."

He considered the funds they would need for the expedition, doing some quick calculations. "You don't happen to know what amount Sahlo is leaving behind, do you?"

"No idea. He might even be in some debt."

Erwin smirked at the idea; that would be a final 'fuck you' from beyond the grave. He wouldn't put it past him. "How does this sound? I have a sum in mind that the Survey Corps needs in order to successfully reclaim Wall Maria. I suspect it will be less than what Sahlo left to me. I know he left a large sum to Rage, which will help out his people, but there's more to the Underground than just Rage. We need to get money and food to all the people who need it."

She cocked her head. "I'm listening."

"I'd like a revised will that overwrites the one I saw today. If you restore my share to the original amounts, I'll not only quadruple your usual fee, but I'll also give you the excess funds from Sahlo - if there are any - to distribute among your neighbours as you see fit." Sahlo had told him to buy something nice for himself, after all. What did he need? He had guaranteed room and board.

Leona pulled out an envelope and slid it across the table.

He opened it. It was a notarized copy of the original will, the one Sahlo had shown him.

"Wanted to make sure you were thinking of us before I gave this to you," she said. "Your lord friend asked me to hang onto it. You'll find any later versions weren't notarized properly."

He raised a brow. "No?"

"The people who bought the altered version were rude as shit." Her smirk had evolved into a grin. "It was my pleasure to screw them over. If they try to use that altered will as evidence against you, you just lean over it and confidently point out that the date stamp is missing a notary number, like you would have immediately noticed it all along."

"Won't this come back to haunt you?"

She shrugged. "I make fraudulent documents. I'm nobody. They have bigger things to worry about."

"I appreciate this, and I won't forget our deal." He finished his tea, then stood.

At the door, he pulled on his boots. "Take care of yourself."

"You too, Erwin. Don't get eaten." Leona gave him a fond smile. "I've been more loyal than you might think, you know. I could have sold you out to Hasek at any point if I wanted to."

"Thank you." He bent down to give her a tight hug; he stealthily slipped a dozen folded notes into her pocket before he released her. It wasn't much, but it would secure her a couple week's worth of meals.

.*.*.*.

Levi sat up, startled.

Erwin softly closed the door. He must have thought Levi was still sleeping, because he quietly undressed in the darkness. The dim light from the cracks around the door highlighted the shape of his chest and stomach muscles. He turned to lay his clothes on the dresser, revealing the defined muscles of his back. Then he eased into the bed.

"Hey," whispered Levi. "How'd it go?"

"Go back to sleep," said Erwin gently. "I'll tell you in the morning."

"How do you know I was asleep?"

"I could tell by the cadence of your breaths when I first slipped through the door." A pause. "Such a peaceful sound."

"My breaths?"

"Yeah. I've missed that sound. I've slept better lately than I have in weeks. Months." He felt Erwin shift closer, then heard a whisper near his ear. "I have no right to ask you this, Levi, but may I hold you tonight as we sleep?"

His breath caught. "You blow up at me because I touch you with my pinky finger, and now you want to-"

"I know. It's hypocritical, and yet..." A long, slow breath, one that fluttered against Levi's skin in the darkness. "I've slept pressed up against every other officer. I've slept in Mike's arms, and with my limbs entwined with Hange or Berit. It's what comrades do when we're in the field. And if I can't lie next to you like a comrade-" He paused. "No, it's more than that. I miss the way you feel next to me, Levi. I miss how you feel in my arms. If nothing had ever happened between us, I could make this request without either of us thinking twice about it." His voice, still whispered, was shaking. Did something happen with Leona that upset him?

Levi wanted to say yes - his skin was parched, it cried out for Erwin to soak it with his body heat - but he was still smarting from their conversation earlier. "This line between us keeps getting blurrier and blurrier."

"I know."

"Every time we take a step closer, it's just going to hurt more if we try to step back again."

"I know."

Levi swallowed hard. "Okay, fine. Do you want me to face you, or face away from you?"

"Turn your back to me, please."

Levi rolled onto his side, and Erwin curled up behind him. A heavy arm draped across his ribcage and curled around his chest. Levi's throat constricted. He had missed this so much: the warmth and the shape of Erwin's body behind him, large and protective. He had even missed the feeling of being compressed by his grasp. These arms were the only place he could be confined in a tight space and not feel trapped.

A hum sounded in his throat before he could stop it. He snuggled back against Erwin, carefully leaving a bit of a gap in front of his pelvis, as he would do if he were lying for warmth with Mike or Eld.

"I missed this." Erwin's breath was hot in his ear, and Levi felt a shiver ripple through him. He felt a nose press into the back of his hair, felt a shuddering inhale. The shudder didn't feel sexual; it felt like a restrained sob.

"You okay?" whispered Levi.

"I've seen countless dead bodies. One more shouldn't bother me. But what I saw tonight, Levi, I wasn't..." The words trailed off into another shuddering breath, an exhale this time.

"It's okay." He shifted his head a little, nestling back against that sharp nose, and in his fatigue, he found the courage to say: "It's okay. I'm here."

Their hands found each other and interlaced, and Levi pressed them against his heart.

.*.*.*.

The next morning, Levi awoke feeling refreshed - and a little sticky. He had forgotten how sweaty it was to sleep pressed together, or how body hair could get so itchy when it was trapped between damp skin. He was repulsed, but glowing at the same time.

He took a lengthy bath, scrubbing his skin until it glowed. He took a little time to explore himself, because when did he ever get a chance to finger fuck himself in the bathtub at the base? It felt so good that he began to get carried away. A tiny part of him hoped Erwin would walk in on him jerking off, but by the time he had finished his bath, the other was still unconscious.

"Hey," he said, using his foot to shove Erwin's shoulder - a bit of a stretch, but it felt good to show a little playful disdain. "It's already eight o'clock."

"Ugh," said Erwin, sitting up and clutching his face.

"You can't be hung over. You didn't even drink last night."

"No, I didn't." Erwin lowered his hand, only one eye open, the other in a squint. "How are you feeling this morning?"

Levi considered the ups and downs of the night before. "My head's all screwed up."

"Yeah." Erwin slowly blinked his one open eye. "After the Council meeting, we should get some dinner and talk through all this."

"Dinner? How long is this fucking meeting?"

"I expect it will last all day. We're making a big ask, and there are a lot of consequences for the other divisions that must be carefully considered. That, and there's the matter of Sahlo's death."

"Oh." Maybe it showed how much Levi disliked the lord; he had already forgotten he was dead. "Go have a bath. The water tank is still hot from mine."

Once Erwin had bathed and dressed, the two of them fell into place in front of the mirrors in the bathroom, shaving and fixing their hair. Once they had dressed, Erwin put on his bolo tie, then turned to Levi. "Think you can help me get this straight?" He looked almost shy.

Levi bit the inside of his cheek and reached up to make the tails even, centring the green stone over Erwin's chest. "Bend down," he added, and he tidied the part in the golden hair.

Then, he tied his cravat and turned to Erwin, who wordlessly adjusted it for him. His fingers lingered on the cravat several moments too long, then the blue eyes lifted.

Levi felt his throat bob. "Well? Let's go."

Erwin gave him a small smile.

They left the building and found their favourite tea shop. The selection was scant, but Erwin insisted on paying extra for a sweet honey pastry for Levi. They both had tea - coffee was in short supply these days - and sat on a bench in the park outside the courthouse. They quietly discussed the upcoming meeting, refreshing themselves on the expedition details.

"Most importantly," said Erwin, "we must remember that there are officially four checkpoints left to stock, not two."

"Right." They had stocked the other two checkpoints so long ago that it was easy to forget.

They ran into Nile on the way into the chambers. Nile gave Erwin a stiff good morning, and a kinder one to Levi.

"How are Marie and the kids?" asked Erwin.

Nile's lip curled at him. "Go fuck yourself."

The Commander's mouth circled into an "o," and as Nile stormed off, Levi leaned in close.

"He still thinks you tried to sleep with Marie."

"Right." Erwin rubbed the bridge of his nose.

They settled into their seats. Zackly was already seated at the head of the table; he folded his hands in front of him.

"Commander Erwin, has anyone informed you about Lord Sahlo?"

"Yes, I received word last night," said Erwin. "It's an unfortunate loss."

Zackly was staring a little too intently. Levi glanced around the table and realized Pixis was doing the same.

Another Council member, Lord Robrecht, was less subtle: "I suppose this leaves you free to march on Wall Maria. How convenient."

"What the hell are you implying?" growled Levi.

The lord's eyes narrowed at him. "You know very well what I'm implying, Captain."

"It doesn't matter."

All eyes shifted to Erwin, who sat tall, chin high. "Believe what you want," he continued. "Your suspicions are of no concern to me so long as we move quickly to fill the void Martin left behind - and it is a large void. The nutritive yeast product was behind schedule, but it was progressing, and without him at the helm-"

"Actually," said Nile, flipping through a file, "the MP have received accusations that the yeast isn't nutritive, but a biological weapon."

Erwin's brows rose. "Pardon?"

"The accusations come from an anonymous source that claims to be an insider on the project. They say the yeast was never meant to be used for consumption; it was made as a water-soluble toxin, and would wipe out an entire population. The source says Lord Sahlo planned to use it to wipe out Wall Sina and leave room for the Underground to rise."

"What the hell?" said Levi.

Pixis started laughing.

"You think that's funny?" cried Lord Robrecht, wringing his knotted hands.

"It's ridiculous, your lordship," said Pixis. "There's absolutely no way Lord Sahlo would be involved in something so preposterous. We all know he had ties to the Underground - that was a relatively open secret - but he was one of the King's closest confidantes."

Levi glanced over at Erwin. The man's jaw was tight. Does he actually think it's possible?

"Erwin," said Pixis, turning to him, "the Survey Corps became heavily involved with Sahlo's project. Surely you can vouch for the idiocy of this accusation."

"I ate some of the yeast product myself," said Erwin. "It was unpleasant, but it was no weapon. Besides, if he were trying to wipe out Wall Sina for some strange reason, why would he opt for yeast instead of a more straight forward weapon?"

"So no one could point a finger at him afterwards," said the lord, dabbing at his sweaty forehead with a handkerchief.

Erwin's eyes shifted to him. "His supposed plan would wipe out anyone with a finger to point. No, this is posthumous slander. Someone wants to waste our time and lock up his assets."

Levi read between the lines: someone's trying to delay our reclamation.

"Regardless of this rumour," said Zackly, "we're going to have to have an inquest to look into the suspicious circumstances of his death. And more than that, we're going to have to look for a new lord to replace his position on the Council."

Minister Nick calmly raised his hand. Levi looked at him, lips pursed. He knew exactly what was coming.

"Yes, Minister Nick?" said Zackly, already sounding weary.

"Given the importance of the Wallists to the King, and given that Sahlo himself was straddling the border between the nobles and the Wallists, I believe our only reasonable course of action is to appoint the purest replacement."

"Purest," snorted the merchant guild leader. "That's ridiculous. You just want one of your cronies to be appointed so you can pass more bills about your fear-mongering-"

"Mr. Weiman," said Zackly, "Minister Nick has the floor."

The Minister stood; he looked like a puppet being drawn up by strings. "It's quite clear we need a more balanced representation on the Council. I'd like to appoint one of my colleagues, a holy man with the highest of morals."

"Perhaps," drawled the lord with disdain, "this is a matter best left to the King. No doubt he has his own successor in mind."

"I'll send word," said Zackly. "In the meantime, we must address a contentious issue, one that Lord Sahlo firmly opposed." He turned to Erwin. "Are you going to make a move for Wall Maria now that he is no longer blocking you? Or are you going to keep on the path the two of you have been walking together?"

Levi tensed as he turned to Erwin, watching him.

Erwin leaned forward, his face taking on his hawk-like focussed expression. "The yeast and the weapons are dead ends. The yeast, though not a biological weapon, will not come together in time to be of use to the Underground. People are starving this moment. Sahlo himself was staving off some of that with his involvement in illicit activities to funnel food to the Underground, or so my intelligence tells me. Without him buying us time, a crisis situation in the Underground is imminent."

The other Council members began to mutter. Nile was staring at his notebook, brows furrowed, but Pixis seemed to be watching Erwin intently. Levi tried to get a read on the old man, but his face was a perfect mask. Or maybe he's just drunk.

"As for the weapons that were intended for the Military Police..." Erwin shifted his focus to Nile. "Nile, we both know guns are useless against titans. A high-powered gun would be nothing more than a good luck talisman. If that's something you think we need in order to give your soldiers' confidence, then I'll take some of the funds Sahlo left me and use them to fast track research and weapons development. However, I'd much rather funnel those funds into producing practical weapons. Squad Leader Hange Zoe has been honing our weapons based on our research on the captured titans. I propose we ignore the gun project and use the funds to produce nets, projectile spears, harnesses, and other restraint equipment. Everyone on the field will benefit. But if you tell me false confidence is more important, I'll trust your expertise."

Nile stared at him for a moment, then shrugged and looked down. "No, it's not. Scrap the guns, and go ahead with other weapons."

A hint of a smile showed in the corner of Erwin's lips, and Levi felt a swell of pride.

"I have been preparing a timeline for Wall Maria," said Erwin, holding out a roll of paper. "May I?"

"Of course," said Zackly.

Erwin unrolled it and placed his checkpoint markers on each of the checkpoints. He placed red ones on the last four. "I didn't anticipate we would be able to move on this so quickly, so I haven't yet had a chance to vet this strategy with each of you - I'd appreciate your input if I'm overlooking anything important. If we agree to this strategy, then this is how things will proceed.

"Mr. Weiman, I'll be using some of Sahlo's generous posthumous donation to pay you for food supplies. I understand that food shortages are a real concern right now, so I would be prepared to pay a premium. Say, ten per cent?"

Levi watched the merchant, waiting for a reaction. Weiman had claimed before that the food shortage itself was the reason he was reluctant to support them, but knowing merchants, money had been the true barrier.

Weiman eyed him. "This isn't just a food shortage, Commander: it's a famine. I need a thirty per cent premium."

"Fifteen," said Erwin. "And we will commit to providing protection for your preferred farmers after the Wall is reclaimed. There is bound to be some instability as everyone sorts out ownership of property in Wall Maria."

"Protection plus twenty, final offer."

Erwin nodded. "Send the contracts to my office in Trost and I'll get them properly signed and notarized."

Weiman folded his arms over his chest and nodded, looking satisfied.

"Are you done shopping?" said the lord dryly.

"This impacts all of us, Lord Robrecht," replied Erwin. "Once we've reclaimed Wall Maria, we'll be able to tackle famine - we'll have time for a full harvest cycle." He slid wooden markers into place around the three checkpoints equidistant from Wall Maria. "These three checkpoints will be where we make our stand. Commander Dok and Commander Pixis, any troops you provide will be fighting alongside us.

"The Survey Corps can leave as early as the end of next week to stock the final four checkpoints. I anticipate that mission taking less than two weeks. While we're absent, the MP and Garrison should be preparing their troops for the journey. I anticipate they'll need approximately four weeks of classroom instruction to be brought up to speed on Survey Corps conventions, as well as the reclamation strategy."

"What is this strategy?" asked the lord. "You never did tell us."

"Commanders Pixis and Nile have discussed it with me before. This is a good time to talk about it in more depth." He slid some markers into Mitras and began to push them north. "The operation will begin approximately two weeks after the Survey Corps returns from the final checkpoint mission. Once we return from that mission, we'll bring the newest set of Trainees into the fold and give them a crash course in Survey Corps methods and techniques. Then, we'll depart. The weakest troops will head north, where they are unlikely to encounter any titans. They'll be escorting supplies to the top of Wall Maria, which will be transported to Shiganshina to help block the hole in the wall from above: nets, cannons, traps and debris. I anticipate that trip taking about a week. We'll time the main body of our group to head south a few days later, so we reach the gate by Shiganshina at approximately the same time."

As he continued to explain the strategy in detail, Levi watched the others for any sign of mistrust. They were all listening intently. As Erwin continued speaking, his confidence seemed to be growing. It was if he could hear how much his plan made sense now that he was bouncing it off other people.

Levi glowed with pride. I chose the right man to follow.

Once Erwin had finished introducing them to the plan, the Council paused for a vote on whether or not the mission should proceed. Every hand rose except two: Minister Nick and his Wallist colleague.

"This is preposterous," said the Minister. "There's no way we should be tampering with the holy walls. Such a thing is utter blasphemy."

Levi eyed him, unimpressed. "Haven't you been listening? People are going to start dying if we don't claim more land."

The Minister had an unnatural glaze over his eyes. "Perhaps that is not what is meant to happen. Perhaps this famine is punishment for humanity's hubris-"

"Knock off the bullshit," said Weiman. "You're cloistered away in your safe little church, so far from the titans that you probably don't even know what they look like. The merchants in Trost are right on the boundary. All it takes is one broken gate-"

"It's immoral," barked the Wallist sitting next to the Minister.

Zackly pulled off his glasses and set them aside, massaging the marks they left behind. "Minister Nick, is there anything we can do to convince you to reclaim the wall?"

"The wall is not to be tampered with."

"Then perhaps you shouldn't be part of this conversation."

The Minister looked shocked. He glanced between the other faces, but no one would make eye contact with him. His eyes narrowed.

"The King will be none too pleased-"

"The King won't have any subjects to rule pretty soon," said Levi. "I'm sure he doesn't want his servants and his cooks and his soldiers to die of starvation."

The Minister looked scandalized. He stood. "He will be hearing about this." He and his cohort left the room, the door slamming behind them.

"Does the King actually give a shit about the Wallists?" asked Levi.

"It's a complicated matter," said Zackly. "Having Wallist representation was something he insisted on. We must respect his wishes. However, the Wallists are notoriously single-minded - hardly conducive of a collaborative project like the Council."

Levi turned to Erwin, whose eyes were narrow. He's trying to connect the dots, but he can't quite see it yet.

"It doesn't matter," said Nile. "The King is a reasonable man, and he knows we can't feed anyone unless we expand our territory. We should keep planning. I want to make sure his soldiers aren't walking into a death trap for nothing." He folded his arms over his chest. "I want to know more about how you're actually going to rebuild the Wall, Erwin, and how we're going to communicate this to the public."

They spent the next couple hours diving into Nile's question in more detail, then paused for lunch. A group of MP served them a bland stew with sweet bread and cheap tea. The room was surprisingly quiet as they ate.

Levi leaned close to Erwin, keeping his voice low. "How do you think it's going?"

Erwin gave him a polite smile. "Everyone's eager to move ahead with the reclamation. That's more than I expected."

"Your plan is good. We're going to succeed."

This time, the smile was genuine.

After lunch, the bulk of the Council disbanded, while the military branches stayed behind to plan: Zackly; Pixis and his aide, Anka; Nile and a female soldier Levi didn't know; Erwin and Levi. They began to pore over the plan in greater detail, assigning deadlines and charting a timeline. Everyone had suggestions and points to bring up, and Erwin incorporated them all. He had been so insecure about his plan in the past that he was probably relieved not to be the only one making strategic suggestions.

They broke for dinner, then pressed on.

By the time the city clock rang nine bells, Levi felt as if his eyes were crossing. Erwin had filled most of his notebook with notes, and Pixis and Nile were busy debating the number of carts they would need to assemble.

Zackly stood. "This has been incredibly productive. However, I think we need to take a break for the night and continue this at a later date." He glanced at his notebook. "Let's set up four or five days of strategic planning after your team returns from stocking the final checkpoint, Erwin, because you'll have the most up-to-date information available then.

"In the meantime: Erwin, your regiment will be in charge of coordinating weapons development and supply acquisition. Nile and Pixis, you will be responsible for dividing your soldiers up by skill and assigning them to squads respectively - northern, defense, scouting, and firefight. Pixis, I'll leave you to work on portable cannon requisition, carts and horses. Nile, you'll handle the acquisition of flares, blades and gas for the travelling teams, and assist Erwin with the financial planning. I'll speak with the King's people to ensure we have his approval - and perhaps try to assuage the Wallists.

"And Erwin, make sure you send detailed maps and strategy to the rest of us. We need to make sure to coordinate and standardize our classroom instruction for this mission."

"Thank you, sir."

The Commanders saluted the Commander-in-Chief, and then they filed out the door.

Once they were out of earshot of the building, Levi turned to Erwin. "That went well."

"Yeah?" said Erwin.

"Yeah. You were good. But I guess we're not going out for dinner after all."

"No. Sorry, I didn't realize it would take so long."

"Not your fault. That was important. Maybe drinks?" He yawned as he said it.

"Maybe." Erwin paused. "I want to discuss our relationship, but-"

"-we already talked all fucking day," finished Levi. "It can wait." Besides, it might be nice to have another night of cuddling under their belts before they spoke, in case their discussion ended up being of the 'let's step back a bit more until after Wall Maria' variety.

They returned to the hotel room, then took turns washing up for bed. Erwin eased into the bed, leaving space for Levi, who hovered in the bathroom doorway, uncertain.

Erwin shifted over a little more. "Would you like to read for a bit?"

"I thought you were tired."

"I am, but my mind is racing. I could use the distraction."

Levi nodded. They snuggled into the pillows - they had seemed too soft the night before, but now, Levi felt tension ebb from his neck and shoulders. He rolled onto his side to watch Erwin's face. They weren't quite touching, but that warmth under the covers was so welcoming that it felt as if they were.

Halfway through the chapter, Erwin read, "'She threw open the heavy oak door, then let out a startled cry. A tall man sat on the bed, his crimson hair tumbling sensually over his broad, well-muscled shoulders. Excitement tingled through her round, ample chest, travelling heatedly to her core. 'My beautiful lady,' he whispered seductively, "you appear to be shivering. Let me warm your alabaster skin with my-' Oh."

"Oh?" repeated Levi.

"I think this is a sex scene." Erwin flipped ahead a page, his brows rising. "Yes, it is."

"What? There wasn't supposed to be any smut in this one." Levi sat up and tried to reach for the book.

Erwin leaned away, flipping the page. "A long scene, apparently. It's rather graphic."

"It can't be that graphic. She's engaged to the duke, and she doesn't even know this guy's name."

"He's 'tasting the folds of her womanhood.' The author is overly fond of the word 'juices.'" He flipped the page, still reading.

"Disgusting," said Levi, but he leaned over Erwin, still trying to reach the book. "Either read it out loud or give it here."

Erwin's eyes twinkled at him as he held the book out of reach. "I didn't think you'd be interested in a woman's juices."

"I'm not, really," said Levi, but he was curious. He was on top of Erwin now, arm straining. "You're built like a fucking ape."

Erwin laughed, and while he was distracted, Levi snatched the book out of his grasp. He flopped back onto his side of the bed and began to read. "Oh."

"I told you: it's graphic."

"What the hell? Her juices are 'gushing forth like a fountain' - do vaginas really do that?"

"Well..." Erwin's cheeks were dark. "The author is taking poetic license, but they can get quite wet."

Levi turned the page. "How many women have you slept with?"

"Pardon me?" Erwin's ears turned pink.

"How many? More than just Marie, right?"

"Yes, but I'd prefer to keep the number to myself."

"Too many to count, huh?" Levi flipped the page. "Now her bosom is 'heaving.'"

"It just means her breaths are heavy and-"

"I know what it means. It's not just breasts that do it. All chests heave." Levi read the next line. "And bounce, too." He was starting to feel lightheaded from the inappropriate discussion.

"What?"

"With each thrust, they jiggle a little. Especially if they're muscular like yours." He suddenly realized how inappropriate it was to discuss this, and how aroused he was at the same time. He closed his mouth and continued reading. "Huh."

"What?"

He flipped to the end of the chapter. "This scene goes on forever."

"Maybe we should skip ahead," said Erwin absently, but he was squeezing his pectoral muscle with his hand. "Does my chest really bounce?"

"Yeah, a bit. Not nearly as much as your ass."

"I see." Erwin plucked the book out of Levi's hands.

"I was reading that."

"We'll continue tomorrow. I think it's time we both went to bed." Erwin swung his legs over the side of the bed and walked stiffly to the bathroom, his back positioned toward Levi.

Is he going to jerk off in there? The prospect was so dizzying that Levi sank into the pillow, adjusting the waistband of his pants. He couldn't shake the memory of Erwin's bouncing ass.

The bathroom door was closed. Levi strained his ears, listening for grunts or slapping or anything that would indicate Erwin was touching himself. Instead, he heard running water, then splashing. He's splashing cold water on his face. Now he was picturing Erwin staring at himself in the mirror, water dripping off the sharp tip of his nose, trying to convince himself he wasn't all worked up. Shit, that's hot.

A few minutes later, Erwin exited the bathroom. The front of his pants was flat, and Levi wished he could say the same.

"We should get some sleep." Erwin slipped into the bed.

"I guess." Levi turned away from him, curling around the awkward lump in his pants. He felt a heavy arm drape around him, strong and warm, and that was only making it worse.

"Goodnight, Levi." The words rumbled against the back of his neck.

"Goodnight."

The lamp dimmed, then went out.

He closed his eyes, trying to focus on something neutral. He found himself thinking of the Council meeting, but that was even worse, because now he couldn't stop recalling how competent and composed Erwin had been. He had been in complete control the entire way through, even when he had let others think they had the floor. And that determined look on his face, that intense gaze-

Fuck it.

He slipped out from under Erwin's arm and strode to the bathroom, feeling for the door. He locked the door behind him and lit the bathroom lamp, then lowered the toilet seat, pretending he was settling in for a lengthy visit.

Instead, he pulled his pants down and leaned against the far corner of the room. He grabbed himself, swallowing back a groan. He couldn't remember the last time he had been this turned on. Probably the time he had overheard Erwin at Christmas - he still felt guilty about eavesdropping back then.

He quietly began to move his hand. Heat rippled through him, along with a deep ache, a need to move faster. He fought the urge and kept it slow, because he needed to stay quiet. The slowness itself was tantalizing, and he soon felt himself sliding down the wall, too distracted to stay standing.

His muscles were tight with frustration; he pressed his free hand over his mouth, because he wasn't going to be able to hold back a moan much longer. His ass hit the floor; being bare-bottomed on the floor should be disgusting, but he didn't care. Keep it slow. His entire arm was shaking with strain. Quiet. Slow and quiet. He began to repeat the words with each stroke, hanging onto them like a mantra, even as they started losing their meaning. A sharp groan sounded in his throat, and he clamped his hand tighter. Quiet!

Orgasm sneaked up on him so suddenly that he had to muffle a yelp. It felt so good, so good, his heels skidding across the floor again and again, trying to get traction, as if he were trying to push himself away from the pleasure.

His abdomen shuddered one last time, then stopped, and his hips slowly lowered back to the cold tile. Stars sparked in his vision. He was slumped against the wall now, a mess on his stomach - he hadn't even bothered to pull out a handkerchief.

He slowly unclasped his face, gasping for breath. Fuck.

He wanted more. He wanted to go back into the main room and climb on top of Erwin. He wanted to feel the man pushing him face-down into the mattress, riding him from behind. Scenario after scenario surfaced, each more pornographic than the last, and he was already starting to get hard again. He experimentally tried to continue, but he was too sensitive.

Just as well. This loss of control was embarrassing.

He carefully washed his hands and abdomen clean. The room smelled like sex now, and he wasn't sure how to fix that. Hopefully it would dissipate before Erwin was in here next.

He paused at the door for a moment, ashamed, before he opened it.

Erwin's breaths were heavy; he was definitely asleep. Levi wasn't sure if he was relieved or disappointed that he hadn't been overheard.

He slipped back into bed. Erwin gave a small, half-asleep moan and pulled him in with one arm.

He wanted more. "Erwin," he said softly.

"Mm?"

"What the hell are we?"

He could tell by the tension in Erwin's arm that he was awake, but there was no reply.