The Road to Middle-earth
A fanfiction by MushrooomsPTook
Disclaimer: I own nothing. You might as well say it owns me!
Chapter Thirty-Six: When Tooks Laugh
I did all that I could from going to sleep that night, for if I did shut my eyes, I was haunted with dreadful thoughts. Thoughts of Sauron, Mount Doom, and the room I had been trapped in previously. The more I thought about it, the more anxious I became. Finally, it was the moment that I decided to shift positions that I began to relax. I could see the shadowy form of Gandalf facing the opposite direction, and just a few feet away from him sat Frodo, asleep as he had been before.
Poor Frodo, I thought. He had no idea what he would face, what he would have to go through. I wondered if it was wise to tell Gandalf everything. After all, he was a wizard, and a very wise one at that. Surely he would know what to do. But then Alice and I might be caught up in a bigger and more dangerous adventure than we intended. And then...we may never get home.
Home. The thought was ever growing on my mind, and it hurt me to think that a part of me wanted to stay here in the Shire when I was also homesick. Perhaps there was a way to be in both places at once.
I was surprised to find that the next time I opened my eyes, it was in the early morning hours, and although I would have tried to roll over and fall back to sleep, there was the delicious fragrance of freshly baked bread that had made its way from the kitchen to the bedroom. I sat up and looked over to see that the chair beside the bed was vacant. Either Frodo was up or he had gone to his own bed during the night.
What really won me out of bed, though, was the knowledge that Gandalf had indeed arrived, for although the old wizard may have been our ticket back home, it was meeting him that interested me more. I opened the door and walked down the tunnels of Bag End in haste. It was very quiet and it appeared that everyone was still in bed, but someone surely had to have made whatever smelled so good. I walked in and found no one present, although recent activity was evident, given by the plate full of freshly baked biscuits and the jam that was set beside it. Crumbs were gathered where one biscuit had been at one time and I considered the possibilities as to where the thief could be hiding.
1I concluded that it had to have been either Merry or Pippin and I went in search for the lads, but as I passed by the front door of Bag End, I heard muffled voices coming from the other side. I strode up to the door and opened it. Much to my surprise, there were two people of contrasting sizes sitting side by side. Smoke rings emerged from in front of them and floated into the sky. The larger person turned around to greet me.
"Oh!" said Gandalf. "You're up rather early. I must admit, I didn't expect to see you for quite some time."
I smiled brightly, my joy increasing by the second, making up for my grogginess last night. Bilbo also turned around and smiled. Crumbs were visible on his lips, but there was no sign of any biscuit. He moved about a foot to his right and patted the empty space between him and Gandalf as an invitation, to which I quickly accepted. I didn't ordinarily like the smell of cigarette smoke, but pipeweed has a peculiar and mystical scent to it that makes one feel very entranced. Considering how the weather had been for the last few days, I would have been cold, except the sun was substantially bright, and Gandalf was emitting a lot of warmth. He was a comfortable shield and even though I was in no danger, I also felt safe.
"Gandalf?" I asked shyly, much to my surprise.
"Yes?"
"Is it really you?" Bilbo inhaled at the wrong time and began choking and laughing at the same time.
"Of course, it's me, Alayna! Who else should I be?"
"Well, no one. I just had to be sure. You see, I've heard a lot about you, and...well, seeing you face to face...it's hard to realize that it is really you. I mean, I know I saw you last night, but I wasn't really myself, I don't think—I mean—I was kind of tired, but now that I can be sure it is you..." Gandalf gave me a curious look, and I realized I was babbling.
"Go on?"
"I just want to say...I'm happy you're here."
Bilbo clasped a hand on my forearm. "We all are, lass. We all are."
Gandalf gave his pipe another puff. "Well, it's good to be back. But I must say, I was not expecting this sort of company upon my arrival, or the tale that went along with it." I cast a glance at Bilbo briefly, who caught my eyes and hinted a wink. "However, I should have known better. After all, this is Bilbo Baggins we are talking about now; I shouldn't expect anything less."
"And whose fault is that, my friend, hmm?" asked the hobbit, tapping the bowl of his pipe expectantly.
Gandalf puffed some more, shaking his head, intentionally avoiding Bilbo's playful stare. "No idea, my dear fellow. But I think you should look into getting that Tookish side of yours harnessed before it starts to bring in pink dragons, and flying pigs, and...only Elbereth knows what else!" I snorted at this and my outburst was greeted with the cheerful laughter from both hobbit and wizard.
When the laughter died down to content smiles, Gandalf, having made a particularly enormous smoke ring, drew in a deep breath and said, "Are you the only one up?"
"Oh, I should think so!" Bilbo interrupted. "It's not even yet eight, Gandalf! And, really...are you familiar with my cousins? I have one whose name is Frodo. He's this lad who makes himself out to look like the perfect gentlehobbit, but he's just an ordinary, mischievous tweenager, who makes the biggest fuss if you wake him before ten! Ten, Gandalf!"
"I believe it," answered the wizard. He looked squarely at Bilbo, and there was a twinkle in his eye. "Because if he's anything like you, and from your description it sounds like it, then I would expect he doesn't dust the mantlepiece, distances himself from adventures, and hoards handkerchiefs as if they were going out of style tomorrow."
"Yes," I groaned at the last bit. Bilbo opened his mouth and closed it again.
"And anyway, Mr. Baggins," Gandalf continued, "I was talking to Alayna."
Bilbo cleared his throat gracelessly. "'Course you were." Then he began to puff on his pipe silently, but faster, and I couldn't tell if he was cross, embarrassed, or both.
"No," I finally responded. "I didn't see anyone else up."
"Then it might do us well to make our plans now."
"Can you help us?" I interrupted.
"I will do my part," Gandalf responded, nodded his head slightly. "Now I did settle on staying in the Shire for a few days, but something unexpected has come up. I must meet a friend about 200 miles journey south of here, in Eryn Vorn."
"Eryn Vorn? What in Middle-earth is so important there?" asked Bilbo.
"I told you. A friend. Now, if you agreed to come, he could guarantee the rest of your journey home."
"To Chicago?" I asked. Gandalf nodded. "Who is he?"
"Oh, he's like me, I suppose, but not like me."
"Well, I haven't heard of any friend!" Bilbo snorted.
"There are a good many things you do not know, Bilbo Baggins, and you should be glad of it!"
Bilbo said nothing, but went back to his pipe. I, on the other hand, was much more deeply interested in knowing more. "Well, when would we leave?" I asked.
Gandalf sighed. "Tomorrow, early, I'm afraid."
"Tomorrow?"
"Tomorrow!" echoed Bilbo. "But Gandalf, you only arrived, and...you can't expect Alayna and her cousin to be packed and ready to go this evening!"
"Why?" I sighed. "There's nothing to pack."
"I leave that choice up to you, Alayna. Either way, I will have to go with or without you. I'm sorry, Bilbo. You understand, don't you?"
Bilbo threw his hands up in the air. "Of course, I don't understand, but I suppose I should be used to you making short visits. I just never expected one this short."
"Neither did I, my friend." There were a few moments of silence, but this only allowed the air to feel thicker than it had been just a few moments ago. Either the sun rolled behind a cloud, or my blood circulation had slowed, for I felt suddenly cold, and I trembled. Gandalf looked at me briefly before rising from the porch.
"Well, I think that's enough of that for now. There are a few people I am anxious to meet this morning, and I think a bit of breakfast is in order."
"But you met everyone last night, Gandalf," said Bilbo.
"Not quite. I have not met this Alice everyone keeps talking about, and I certainly did not have the chance to meet your other nephews, did I? Meriadoc, and...isn't there another one now?"
"Peregrin?" asked Bilbo.
"Is that his name? Well, I thought I knew all there was to know about hobbits, but I stand corrected. The names you give your children get more interesting every day. Anyway, I don't believe I've had the pleasure of meeting him yet."
"Well then why wait?" I asked anxiously. No meeting was ever recorded in Tolkien's books, and I was very interested to watch it first hand, but a little more anxious at how my little cousin would react to seeing her hero come alive from her favorite book.
Upon entering inside the comfort of Bag End, there was no need to cook breakfast (second breakfast for Bilbo), for most of the hobbits were already up, including Merry and Pippin. But these two were blind to Gandalf's presence, having recently stumbled upon Bilbo's plate of biscuits. Meanwhile, Esmeralda and Eglantine were making pancakes, while their husbands were busy setting the table.
Only two people were absent from the busy activities: my cousin, Alice, and a certain dark-haired tweenager, whose identity remained hidden under a heap of blankets and pillows, or so Bilbo assumed. Pervinca was sent to summon up the sleeping beast and also to check up on the status of Alice. But I stayed, for I was too anxious to see what would happen when Merry and Pippin finally turned around.
They did, eventually, but unfortunately for Bilbo, at a bad time. Pippin, whose face and fingers were covered in jam, seized the plate and began licking it clean after Merry had taken the last biscuit. When Pippin lifted his eyes to the shadowy figure that was distracting him from fully enjoying his morsel, the child froze. Everyone watched in terror as Pippin, startled by the giant that stood just feet before him, dropped the beautiful plate. This in turn, raised a hell of commotion, not to mention Merry's reaction, having been startled by the loud noise, and looked for what had caused his young friend such distress. He gave one blood-curdling scream and opened one of Bilbo's cabinets, hurling all the mixing bowls out before taking shelter inside.
2 Meanwhile, Paladin was in a state trying to get to his son before he cut his toes, while Eglantine fetched the broom, and a bewildered Bilbo was heard mourning for the loss of his plate. The wizard was so taken aback by all the wild activity that happened over the span of five seconds, that his arms waved around frantically, trying to look out for all the hobbits that were scurrying frantically around him. But this only made Gandalf look monstrous and it was too much for Pippin. All of the sudden he let out the sounds of heartbreaking wails that resulted in a stream of tears. While Eglantine swept up the mess, Paladin lifted his son, who buried his face in the waistcoat, and did his best to bring comfort to the excited lad.
Esmeralda and Saradoc were making a lot of noise themselves, picking up all of Bilbo's bowls while trying to coax their son out of the cabinet. Pimpernel and Pearl had been taking in the situation from a safe distance and seemed to lose all civility and mannerisms they'd been taught, and were jumping up and down, clapping and cheering. Then there was me. I didn't know what to do. If I ran into the kitchen to try and help, I would just be in the way. If I tried to quiet down the girls, I would probably add to the noise. So I ended up doing what seemed natural. I greeted Frodo, as he rounded the corner, hair disheveled, and the imprint of the creases of linens visible on his face.
"What in Elbereth's name is going on?" he asked groggily. Behind him followed Pervinca and Alice. My cousin was looking just as confused until she got far enough into the Parlor that she froze. Amidst all the chaos, she seemed more interested in the person who had caused all the commotion. He was moving this way and that, doing his best to watch out for hobbits. Hobbits cleaning, hobbits crying, and hobbits shouting. At last, he figured he would be more useful outside the kitchen, where things were more quiet. And that's when Alice saw him, and he saw her.
"You must be Alice," he said. "I'm sorry our meeting couldn't be more calm..."
Alice said nothing, but a slow smile spread across her face, and something in her eyes twinkled...was it tears? Without a warning or a sound, she sprang forward and clasped her arms around the old wizard, burying her head in the fabric of his cloak. Gandalf didn't seem to know what to make of this situation and looked at me with uncertainty in his eyes. All the noise, except for Pippin's crying, had died down, and I realized that they were watching the pair. Gandalf tried to rectify the awkward situation and patted her head gently saying, "there, there...Who am I except an old man bent from old age..."
Alice finally lifted her head, and I was surprised but also warmed by the fact that she was indeed crying. The wizard certainly didn't know what to do and when he tried to ease the situation by prying her arms from around him, she began laughing and literally used his hands to climb into his arms. Frodo snorted into sudden laughter, but his voice had not adjusted to the waking hours, and the outburst sounded very girly. This in turn caused Merry to cackle, but he had eating his biscuit again and started to choke. Saradoc firmly slapped his back, causing a chunk of soggy bread to fly out of his mouth and hit Pippin between the eyes. The child immediately stopped crying and turned his full attention on his older cousin. He stared for several seconds in blessed silence and then burst into a fit of giggles, pointing at Merry, whose face was red and eyes watered. The older lad glared a bit, but then Gandalf, still holding onto Alice, began to chortle softly, and then louder. Little Peregrin cocked his head at the new sound and stared wide-eyed at him. When Gandalf's laughter grew louder, Pippin looked as though he was about to cry again, but then fell helplessly into more giggles, rolling about in his father's arms and pointing at the wizard. When Pippin let out a snort, Merry began to giggle wildly and demanded that everyone listen to what funny noises his cousin made.
In the end, however, all the laughter was cut short when Bilbo sniffed the air and said, "Is something burning?" Realizing that breakfast had been totally neglected, both Eglantine and Esmeralda rushed to salvage the burning pancakes. But it was too late. Esmeralda scraped off what was left of the four they had started and held it up in sad disappointment. Everyone stayed silent, not really sure what to do or say. But that only lasted about five seconds before Pippin cried out, "Dwagon!" and began a cycle of cackles all over.
"Oh," muttered Gandalf. "You little fool of a Took!"
A/N – I can't do it. I know I said this chapter wouldn't be up for about a month, but I can't stop writing, even though my life is going crazy right now. I want you all to know that I think about you and all your support and had so much fun writing this chapter for you. I love you all, and since I said this chapter would be up in about a month, you can most likely expect the next one in a week ;)
LittleJerseyanNinja – Believe me, I'm quite freaky about the Hobbit myself, in case you haven't noticed all the references. But since this story happens after the events of the Hobbit, I am trying to anticipate the quest for the Ring and tell Alayna's separate story at the same time. Have you tried listening to an audio rendition of The Lord of the Rings? I recommend Rob Inglis' unabridged version. Unabridged, because that's the only way you can go with LotR. :) Try it out. If you're looking for something more cinematic, check out BBC's radio drama of the trilogy. Ian Holm (who played Bilbo in the movies) stars as Frodo in this version.
Daddys number 1 girl – Thank you, as always. :)
seafarer – It's funny, because I don't think it was too frightening. But you're right about one thing: It is bad indeed. Mwahahahaha!
1Soundtrack The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring (The Complete Recordings) "The Shire" (Howard Shore)
2Soundtrack Home Alone "Holiday Flight" (John Williams)