A/n I had a hell of a time with this chapter. I rewrote it like 5 or 6 times because it was so bad. I think I finally like it...Reviews are coffee to the soul.

Rory and Jess landed in California just after noon, Thursday afternoon. When they picked up their rental car, Rory insisted they upgrade to a brand new silver Mustang Convertible.

"Jess we're in California, we have to get the convertible," she insisted. "It's tourist law."

"Whatever you say," he rolled his eyes.

"I made us a collection of songs for California," she said when they were in the car. She pulled a CD out of her purse and put it in the CD player. Don Henley "Boys of Summer" started playing as Jess pulled onto the freeway.

"Out on the road today I saw a Deadhead sticker on a Cadillac.

A little voice inside my head said:

"Don't look back, you can never look back."I thought I knew what love was.

What did I know?

Those days are gone forever.

I should just let 'em go, but..."

A week after from returning from California, Rory had come over to Jess' apartment for the evening. It was late and she was drifting off to sleep.

"I really appreciated you coming to Venice Beach with me," Jess said out of the blue.

Rory thought he was asleep. "Of course, it was fun. They looked happy."

"Yea they were," he agreed. "It was the perfect wedding for them."

"I adore Sasha and Lily is a good kid," Rory added.

"I can't believe Lily is graduating next year," Jess mused. "The first time I met her, she was reading in Jimmy's room.

"Jimmy's nice too," Rory added. "You guys are on good terms at least?"

"Yea, sure," Jess said quietly. "I guess."

"He may not be father of the year, but he has an impressive record and book collection."

"Okay, the apple didn't fall far from the tree," Jess laughed a little.

"I think he appreciates that you came," she said, kissing his cheek."My mother is going to love all the band onesies we picked up for the baby."

"If I have anything to say about it, he will have excellent taste in music," Jess said in mock seriousness.

"I'm glad we got to go to the beach," she purred in his ear. "It's been a long time since I was in the back of a car."

He smirked. "We were lucky we weren't caught."

As Jess drove into Santa Monica where they were staying at a hotel, he realized how fitting that song was for him and the time he spent in California.

Rory had emphatically told him that she forgave him for his sins of the past, but that didn't mean Jess had ever forgiven himself for those sins, especially for breaking her heart. Jess had not anticipated these old feelings resurfacing as soon as he set foot in California.

The last time he was here had gone surprisingly well, with him and Jimmy having a beer together for the first time. This time was different though, this time Rory was with him and suddenly Jess wondered if coming back here had been a good idea.

"Hey, what's going on up there?" Rory asked, massaging his head gently after Jess suddenly went quiet in the middle of their conversation.

He instantly snapped out of his trance and smiled down at her and kissed her forehead softly, closing his eyes and letting his kiss linger. "I love you," he said softly.

Rory looked up him, "I love you too."

A heavy silence filled the room.

"Is something bothering you? Rory asked tentatively playing with his hair.

"It's just…" Jess started, his tongue tied in a knot.

Rory stroked his face tenderly with her palm and he closed his eyes. She knew she needed to let him find the words he was looking for. She hadn't not forgotten the words Luke told her after the disastrous dinner with her grandparents.

"The first time I knew I was in love with you, I was looking out at the ocean in Venice Beach," he finally said, speaking slowly. "I mean I think I knew way before then, probably the first time you called me Dodger, but the first time I wanted to tell you was then."

Rory let him continue without a word.

"I just," He paused playing with a stray thread on the bedspread. "I hate that I…that we… had to go through everything we went through to get to this. I mean, I guess some would have wise words about 'adversity' or whatever," He took a deep breathe. "I have so many regrets and I do think they have all lead to where I…where we are…but being with you, in California, just brought back all this crap."

"And it's bothered you since you got home?" Rory asked gently.

"I haven't ever been able to really talk about this because it's just…"he paused. "Leaving Stars Hollow defined me for so long, or at least in my mind it did. I never thought we would get back together. I know I drifted in and out of your life for a while. Even since we've been back together, I keep waiting for you to remember that I left you and broke your heart once before."

After they checked into their hotel, Rory wanted to take a walk around the boardwalk. They were going to meet up with Jimmy and Sasha for dinner. Jess told Rory he had a headache and to go on without him. When she left, Jess closed his eyes for a few minutes; letting certain memories wash over him. He grabbed his coat and left the room.

He drove into Venice Beach. It didn't matter how much he had grown up or how different his life was, this place could transport him back to that terrible time in his life when he had come here.

Determined not to let his issues ruin their trip, his legs carried him down a street he knew well, and there it was: the pay phone. The last time he stood here, he thought he would never see her again. This was the place where Rory said she was done. He picked the phone up and listened to the dial tone.

"Stop being ridiculous," he said to himself.

He put the phone down and went to go find Rory.

Rory closed her eyes to fight back the tears. "Oh Jess," she choked out. "I'm not going anywhere," she said kissing his forehead, letting a tear fall.

"Neither am I," he choked out. "I'm so sorry."

"You don't have to keep apologizing," she smiled. "I know you are," she paused and met his gaze. " It was so long ago, It's been forgiven. I know it was something you needed to do," Rory paused. "Besides that, you're stuck with me now mister," she said to lighten the mood.

"I am?" he smirked.

"After earlier tonight," she bit her lip. "There is an excellent chance you will never get rid of me."

"Good," he said and kissed her deeply.

When their kiss broke, she pressed her forehead to his.

"That part of your life is a big mystery to me. I'd like to know about it… if you want to tell me."

"You do?"

"Only what you want to tell me. But yeah, I do."

A/n- I recommend Don Henley's Boys of Summer turned up loud in a convertible.