Chapter 36 - Prayer

The plane, an Air Force C-17, pulled into its parking spot and shut down its engines, the staff car immediately pulling to the front of it, Howard getting out, waiting for the aircraft door to open. He felt apprehensive, worried, sad and excited at the same time, he was going to see his wife again, but he was also going to have to talk to Penny. He felt that he failed them both, his wife for getting involved in something dangerous again and Penny for not watching out for Leonard well enough. His apprehension grew as he watched a crew member come out the door to set up the stairs and then watched as a familiar face left the plane, Major Gray.

Bernadette was holding Penny's hand as they walked out the aircraft door, following Major Gray, she was very concerned about Penny. Penny had held her hand the whole flight and Bernadette listened to her friend, quietly begging God that Leonard would be okay, even offering herself for his life. Bernadette knew it was going to be bad if Leonard died, Penny was a mess already and Bernadette wasn't sure how Penny would recover loosing him. That was the problem, the chaplain told her that they didn't think Leonard was going to survive and it was hard to be happy knowing that the reason the military rushed them there was so his wife could be with him when he died.

Bernadette had been so worried about Penny that she didn't even consider her own feelings when it came for her to see her husband. So when she saw Howard, all her pent up emotions suddenly came flooding out, all she could think of was running to him, she wanted to be in his arms so bad. Bernadette barely heard Major Gray when she took Penny's hand and told Bernadette to go to him, but she didn't need any more encouragement, she ran.

Howard saw his wife running to him and walked as quickly as he could to her, them almost knocking each other over as she wrapped her arms around his neck and started to sob on his shoulder. Even though she was pressing on his arm, he ignored the ache, he wouldn't have moved her for anything in the world, it felt so good and he quickly put his other arm around her. "It's okay Honey, It's okay."

Major Gray watched the whole reunion, a tear in her eye, then looked at Penny, any joy she felt for the Wolowitz now gone as she looked at the grief on Penny's face. "Come on Mrs. Hofstadter, let's go to your husband." Gray watched as Penny turned to look at her and she thought that Penny had just noticed she was there for the first time.

"You told me he would be okay." Penny flatly stated to Gray.

Gray swallowed, not knowing any words that would help Dr Hofstadter's wife feel any comfort. "I'm sorry." was all Gray could respond with.

- TIN MAN - TIN MAN - TIN MAN - TIN MAN - TIN MAN - TIN MAN -

Turner was waiting for them when they arrived at the hospital, with the doctor, that had talked to him and Howard before. The doctor seemed a little nervous, but when Turner looked at him, he immediately started talking. "Mrs. Hofstadter, would you like to see your husband?" The doctor then looked at Turner who nodded.

Penny barely squeaked out "Yes."

"Please follow me."

The doctor brought them to a critical care room in intensive care, and the sight they saw when they went into the room made them all gasp, especially Penny. Howard had not seen Leonard since he was taken out of the suit, so the change was a shock to him, but as he looked at Penny, he knew she was overwhelmed. They probably all expected Leonard to be on his back in bed with all kinds of medical equipment hooked up to him, but that wasn't the case. Leonard was on a cloth covered padded board, face down, with a breathing machine attached to his face pumping air into him. His left side was elevated slightly and there seemed to be a cage on his left side with rods going into his body around his arm, leg and hip. He had bandages around his torso and his skin was slightly gray, except for the places it was deep purple, he looked more dead than alive. There was a nurse in the room checking the machines as they all stood there.

The doctor turned to look at them all, especially Penny, who seemed ready to faint. "Mrs. Hofstadter are you okay?" Howard and Bernadette each both grabbed one of Penny's arms in case she collapsed again.

"Lieutenant Colonel Hofstadter is in a coma, which is probably best for now."

"Dr. Hofstadter." Penny said softly, everybody looking at her.

The doctor looked confused and looked at Turner, who just stated to the man. "Lieutenant Colonel Hofstadter, is a Phd in Physics."

The doctor nodded and looked at Penny, she was obviously upset, "Dr Hofstadter, being in a coma is keeping him from feeling pain, which is probably pretty bad right now, but since he is in a coma we don't have to give him pain drugs, that may be bad for his brain swelling. Really it is probably best he is in a coma now." He looked at Penny who was just staring at her husband, so he looked at Turner who nodded.

"Mrs. Hofstadter, his brain is swollen, but it seemed to have stopped swelling, however we need to watch it closely. If it starts swelling anymore, we will need to release the pressure, so I need you to sign some consent forms in case we need to operate again." The doctor kept looking at Penny but she didn't stop looking at Leonard.

Then Penny did something that surprised everyone, she walked to Leonard and put her hand on his bare right arm, gently touching him. It happened so fast, the doctor didn't have time to tell her not to do that, and after, she just stood there looking at her husband, the doctor didn't have the heart to tell her to stop. Penny slowly looked at the doctor, "He's cold."

The doctor nodded, "His body temperature is down a degree or two, from the operation, but he is breathing and his heart is beating, believe me he is alive. Also, even though his brain is swollen, we are still recording activity, so there is still brain function."

Everybody just stood there watching Penny, who after a few minutes took her hand off Leonard then walked to the wall where there was a chair and just sat down, never taking her eyes off her husband. The doctor watched her then turned to Turner, confusion on his face, then in a whisper to Turner, "What is she doing."

It was Howard who answered the doctor, "I think she is planning on staying with him."

"That is not allowed…."

"Doctor, lets talk outside." Turner cut the doctor off and motioned for him to follow him outside.

The doctor didn't like what was happening, it was obvious on his face, but he followed the General into the hall. "Sir she can't stay in the room."

"Doctor, do you think Dr Hofstadter is going to survive?"

"To be honest sir, No. I'm surprise he is still alive, I thought the internal bleeding or the brain swelling would have killed him by now. I don't think he will wake up."

Turner nodded, he figured that when he saw him. "So what difference does it make if his wife is with him till the end?"

"But Sir that is against the rules. Family can't live in intensive care with the patient."

"Whose rules?"

"The hospitals, the Army's."

Turner had the Army Chief of Staff's cell number, Four Star General Washburn wanted Turner to call him if everything significant happened with the project. Turner had already told him about the explosion and he knew the General would be interested about what Howard told him about the newly discovered suit material properties, so he could call him right now if the wanted. "Doctor, I can call General Washburn right now and get those rules changed, but I can promise tomorrow you and the hospital commander will be looking for new jobs. Would you like to call your commander and let him know?"

The doctor stared at the General in shock, he had never been threatened by a General officer, and what made it worse, he could tell this man wasn't kidding. "No Sir."

"You can tell her what not to do and watch her, if she starts acting up and being a problem, you can remove her, but right now she stays. She will probably need a bed too, so can you please roll one of those hospital beds in the room for her."

"Yes Sir."

Turner hated that he had to do this to the doctor, the man was obliviously a good doctor and officer. "Just let her stay there with him. Like you said he probably doesn't have long, let her be with him till the end. We owe it to him and her. Sometimes the rules need to be broken to do the right thing, doctor."

The doctor relaxed, "Yes Sir, we will take care of her."

- TIN MAN - TIN MAN - TIN MAN - TIN MAN - TIN MAN - TIN MAN -

The next hour was a hour of activity in Leonard's room, made with almost no noise, as a hospital bed was rolled in his room and put against the wall at the same level as Leonard was laid out. Penny was told what she couldn't do, then Bernadette helped her get into the hospital scrubs they gave Penny to sleep in. It was midnight when Bernadette talked Penny into getting into the bed and left her with her husband and the hospital staff, General Turner the one that finally convinced they both to leave. Turner then took them to the building with Howard's room for the night, in his staff car, while he went to his, wondering if he would actually sleep that night, thinking that one of his men could be dying that night.

- TIN MAN - TIN MAN - TIN MAN - TIN MAN - TIN MAN - TIN MAN -

Penny laid in her bed on her side, she wanted to lay next to Leonard, but that was one of the rules for her to stay, she couldn't touch him without permission. So she just laid there looking at him, hearing the soft beeps of the machine that monitored his heart and the air being pushed in and out of him. Penny right now hated herself, this was all her fault, if she would have accepted how she felt about him, a couple of years ago, and just told him she did love him, instead of breaking up with him, she knew they wouldn't be here. She would probably have married him much earlier and they would have children, and they would be so happy…..the tears readily came from her eyes as she thought of them together with their child just walking in the park hand-in-hand. The thought that she might never hold his hand again, or kiss him, made her stomach hurt, and again she begged any deity who would listen to please not take him from her, she promised she would never hurt him or let him go, just please, please don't take him.

- TIN MAN - TIN MAN - TIN MAN - TIN MAN - TIN MAN - TIN MAN -

Howard and Bernadette walked into Howard's room, pulling Bernadette's and Penny's bags behind them, not really talking much since they left the car. They hadn't talked much in the car either, just held each other, both lost in their thoughts about Leonard and concerned about how Penny was taking everything. It wasn't till they were alone when they could actually think about each other, they stopped in the room, standing and just looking at each other.

Bernadette finally walked up to him, her emotions again coming out, but now with no reservations, she took her fists and pounded, not really hard, on Howard's chest and started crying. "You promised….you promised you wouldn't do this anymore." This went on for about five seconds before she ended up sobbing on his shoulder.

Howard was stunned at first, but then quickly understood, feeling guilty again because he had made her like this. "I'm sorry honey, it wasn't suppose to be dangerous, we had no idea it would go wrong. I wouldn't have done it, if I knew it was going to be dangerous. I really mean that."

It was over a minute before Bernadette's crying let up so she could speak. "I need to you to promise…sniff...no more Howard…sniff…I can't do this alone…sniff…I can't raise this baby without you."

Howard had been rubbing her back, but now stopped, "Baby? Did you say baby?"

"Howard, I'm pregnant."

Howard lifted her off his shoulder to look at her, her face was tear stained and she was still sniffling, "You're pregnant? You're really pregnant?"

Bernadette just nodded. "We both need you. I'm carrying your baby, Howie. You have responsibilities to me and our baby now. No more Howard, no more."

Howard pulled his beautiful pregnant wife close to his chest, her head going back to his shoulder, "No more Bernie, I understand, no more."