The Call Home
Dick was bored. Very bored. He knew that his boredom would probably get him into trouble, but somehow, he couldn't seem to bring himself to care. He was supposed to be busy. He was at work after all! But Bruce was on a business trip without him (not that he cared or was hurt that Bruce hadn't invited him.)
Normally, this would be the time that he visited his brothers and asked them to put him to work, but they had decided that school was a priority for them. Losers. Entertaining him should be their top priority.
Sighing, he went to stand by his window again. If there was one thing to be grateful for, it was the amazing view that his office had. That and the fact that it was down the hall from Bruce's. Wait, Bruce's office. That was the key to exercising his boredom.
Grinning, Dick casually headed down the hall and walked into Bruce's office. Sitting at Bruce's desk, Dick started sifting through his drawers. He was pleasantly surprised to find an envelope taped to the top of his drawer. Studying it, Dick noted the worn paper that signified that Bruce opened the envelope often. Deciding to open it, Dick gasped when he saw the contents. All the Father's day cards, Christmas cards, and Birthday cards that him and his brothers had ever written were neatly stacked within. In addition, there were a few old photographs. There was one of Dick first arriving at the manor, his first paintball battle, Jason playing video games, Tim and his first chemistry set, Damian's first day of school, all four of them at the pool, and all of them pranking Bruce were among the few that stood out.
Dick wiped a tear carefully from the corner of his eye. He would never ever tell Bruce that he had found the envelope. While Bruce would get adorably awkward, he would disappear to that Batcave for a week and come out more gruff than he had been in a long time. Alfred said that he was rebuilding the wall around his heart. Personally, Dick didn't think it could get much bigger. It already rivaled The Great Wall of China.
Carefully, Dick placed the cards and photos back into the envelope in the order that he found them in. It was almost guaranteed that Bruce knew the order of the envelope's contents, and it would be amature of him to get caught because of it.
Taping the envelope back into its original position, Dick was just about to start digging through the next drawer, when Bruce's office phone rang. Dick eyed it suspiciously. Was Bruce paranoid to call his office phone to catch him in the act of riffling through his stuff? The answer was undoubtedly yes. But what if it was someone else. A hermit that didn't get the memo that Bruce Wayne was currently in Tokyo? What if it was important?
Taking a deep breathe, Dick answered the phone with a phony french accent. Hopefully, if it was Bruce, he wouldn't recognize him. Although that seemed to be highly unlikely. "Bruce Wayne's office. How may I be of assistance?"
A female throat cleared. "Hi. Can you put Mr. Wayne on the phone. This is Ms. Cassidey, I'm the secretary at Gotham Prep. All three of his sons are in the office currently."
Dick couldn't help it. He swore. Multiple times. In about five different languages. Switching to his normal voice he said, "Hi Ms. Cassidey. This is Dick Grayson. Apparently the school did not get informed about Bruce's business trip to Tokyo."
There was a pause before Ms. Cassidey let out a nervous giggle. "I'm so sorry Mr Grayson. All three boys informed us of the situation, but Jason frequently claims that Mr. Wayne is out of town, so we stopped believing him."
Dick face palmed. He really hoped that the secretary could not hear it on the other side of the line, but he just couldn't believe that Jason didn't have the creative ability to come up with a better excuse. The guy lied for a living and that was the best that he could come up with?
Sighing, Dick started to reach for his phone and keys, when he realized that he had left them in his own office. "I'll be there as soon as I can. I should be authorized to sign them out."
There was the sound of keys clicking before Ms. Cassidey responded. "It looks like you are listed as the second contact after your father."
Dick closed his eyes. He was grateful that Bruce trusted him that much, but this was seriously going to be a pain in the ass. Bruce better bring him home a nice present. And take him on a nice trip. Without the kids.
Saying good-bye to the secretary, Dick jogged down the hall and into his office. Deciding that he best try and look professional, Dick shrugged on his sports coat and grabbed the hat he had decided to wear on a whim. Grabbing his keys, phone, and wallet, Dick hurried down the stairs. He may be on the top floor, but there was just something about elevators that he didn't like. He only took it if he had too.
Pausing for a moment, Dick unlocked his phone and dialed Bruce. He didn't care that it was technically around one in the morning. If he had to deal with this mess, then so did Bruce. Unfortunately, Bruce did not seem to get the memo. Dick had to call him three times before the man decided to pick up his phone.
"Hello?"
Bruce's voice was groggy, and Dick almost felt bad for calling him. Almost. "Finally! I had to call three times for you to pick up! Did you forget about me already? First you decide not to take me on a business trip with you, and now you forget that I exist! Wow. Good job Dad. Good job."
Bruce grunted, and Dick could imagine him flopping back onto his bed, both relieved and annoyed that he hadn't been called because the world was ending in Gotham. "It's one a.m. Dick. I'm jet lagged, and it took me a while to find my phone."
Sighing dramatically Dick reached his car and started the engine. "Look. I'm not calling to ask how many shots of sake you had. I'm calling because all three of my brother's managed to get sent to the principal. Apparently, the secretary didn't believe that you were away."
"So how did you get the call? Don't they usually call my office, then my cell phone?"
Dick was so glad that the light had turned red and he was dutifully stopped, because if not, he would have swerved into oncoming traffic. How could he have been that careless? "Well...I may have been in your office because I missed you. And it is not out of the realm of possibility that I answered your phone using a fake french accent." Dick figured it was safer to say that he missed Bruce rather than he was bored and decided to snoop.
Bruce sighed before saying, "Dick. When I get back, we're having a talk about personal boundaries. Again."
Dick pouted. "I rather get the sex talk again. At least you were as uncomfortable as I was."
"Dick. Just try to keep your brothers from being expelled."
Pulling up in front of the school, Dick parked and leaned back in his seat rubbing his eyes. "You owe me so big for this one Old Man. I expect to be paid with a nice 'business trip.' Just the two of us. Something tells me that after today I won't want to see my brothers for a little while."
For a moment, Dick was afraid that Bruce had hung up on him. The man was far too quiet. Then Bruce cleared his throat slightly and said, "Deal Chum. I do believe the Mexican branch of Wayne Corp has been having some trouble lately. Perhaps it's time we went there and smoothed things out?"
Dick smiled faintly. "I'm still mad you left me and now I have to deal with this, but I do believe a margarita will change my mind. I really do have to go now though. I can feel the principal's anger and impatience from my car."
"Go make sure your brother's aren't expelled. I'll see you when I get home." Bruce paused for a moment before simply saying, "Dick."
Dick paused trying to unbuckle his seatbelt and grinned. "I love you too Dad. I'll see you soon."
Hanging up, Dick resumed his battle with the seatbelt. It probably wouldn't have been much of a struggle if he wasn't stressing over the many things his brothers could have done. Thinking of Damian and Jason, he knew that murder was within the realm of possibilities. But Tim? He wasn't exactly known for causing problems in class. Or any where.
Clammering out of his car, Dick jogged across the parking lot and into the school. He wasn't sure whether it was a good thing or not that he knew where the principal's office was. Granted, he had gone to this school, but that was five years prior. The fact that he was so confident that it was in the same place was the worrying part.
Taking a deep breathe, Dick breezed into the principal's office, making sure to keep his body language very relaxed. The first thing that happened when he walked in was all three of his brothers stood up and started yelling at him. They were probably saying something in their defense, but honestly, Dick couldn't distinguish any one thing that each of them said.
He felt like Bruce when he held up a hand and said, "Enough! I'm not sure how exactly this is going to work, but I'm going to make sure you boys don't get expelled. You can tell me your side of the story later. Preferably, after I have a glass of wine in my hand."
"Solving your problems with alcohol is not an example you should be setting."
Dick turned around and narrowed his eyes. The principal was leaning against the door to his office. It wasn't the same principal that he had had, but he had already met Mr. Kade once or twice due to Jason and Damian. "I never do. But I find that it can help me relax, and I think I might need that. Not that it's any of your business, but I hardly ever drink more than a glass. And the only time I was ever really drunk was when my friend spiked the punch without telling me."
Dick straightened and allowed himself to take a more serious tone and appearance. "I assume that you want to talk alone?"
Mr. Kade narrowed his eyes and stood up straight. If Dick didn't live with Bruce, he might have been intimidated by the man's height and physique. But as it was, the intimidation tactic did not faze him at all. In fact, Dick thought that it was kind of petty of the man to try and intimidate Dick. The man should have known due to all the rumors and articles about Dick, whether he be inside the boardroom or not, that he never submitted to anyone. Even Bruce. Well sometimes Bruce.
Narrowing his eyes further, Mr. Kade jerked open his office door and allowed Dick to enter first. The door closed with a heavy thunk leaving a tense silence in its wake.
It was Jason who broke the silence. "Ten bucks says Dickhead chews asshole up and spits him out."
Damian scoffed. "That's a terrible wager Todd. It is quite obvious that that will be the result."
Tim sank further into his chair and turned a page in his book. "For once, I agree with the Demon Brat. Mr. Kade doesn't stand a chance."
###
Dick allowed himself to showcase a relaxed posture, even though he was anything but. It was strange, he decided, sitting on this side of the desk. Mr. Kade had the Home advantage, but there was no way that Dick would allow him to see his discomfort. That would be when the man gained the real advantage.
He watched with slight disinterest as Mr. Kade shuffled some papers around. He knew the tactic, the man was trying to make it look like he had all the answers in front of him even though he didn't. He often saw the strategy in the boardroom. It didn't work on him. At least not anymore. "Twenty-three is pretty young to be the guardian of three boys."
Dick blinked, but otherwise gave no outward sign of his annoyance. That comment was made to gage his reaction. "I'm their brother, not their guardian. Dad is out of the country so he asked me to come in his stead."
Mr. Kade raised an eyebrow. "The behavior that your brothers are displaying is usually indicative of a larger problem at home."
Dick sat back further and scratched his nose. "If you're trying to imply that Bruce is a bad father, I'm going to have to stop you right now. Bruce is the best dad that I could have ever asked for. Unlike other people, he never cared about our roots. We were just kids to him. We're his sons. Not his play things."
Mr. Kade sat back and crossed his legs. Narrowing his eyes slightly, he said, "Let's start with Tim."
Dick grinned internally. He had won the first battle. Now he just had to win the war.
"Tim fell asleep again during class. His teacher has been especially lenient over his sleeping patterns, but it was simply inexcusable that he yelled, 'leave me alone Dickhead' after she tried to wake him up."
Dick nodded along with the principal even though he was internally rolling his eyes. Seriously, that's all it took to be sent home these days? "As we have already talked about with Ms. Decraw, Tim has problems sleeping at night due to horrible nightmares. The doctor says it has to do with all the kidnappings and the fact that he was neglected before he came to live with us. As for the rude comment, he probably thought that it was me waking him up."
Mr. Kade seemed to buy the story. "He can come back tomorrow." Dick hardly found himself feeling relieved. He had the feeling that Jason and Damian did not just fall asleep in class.
"Let's get started on Damian. He was caught tackling a student on the playground and raining punches down on him."
Dick sighed. Of course Damian did something that couldn't be explained by nightmare and idiot older brothers. "Do you know what the other student said to him?"
Mr. Kade frowned. "Your brother is not known for his mild temper. In fact, it's quite the opposite. What makes you think he was provoked?"
Dick rubbed his temples. He didn't want Mr. Kade to realize that he had the upper hand. "My brother may be ill-tempered, but he had his ipod with him today. Damian would've been sitting quietly in some corner listening to his music unless he was provoked. Why don't we bring him in here and ask?"
Mr. Kade nodded is assent and Dick stood up slowly and went to the door. Sticking his head out, he watched as all three of his brothers scrambled up so that they were standing. "Damian? Can you come in here for a moment?"
Dick watched as Damian steeled his resolve, lifted his chin up in defiance and marched over and into the office. Settling into the seat next to Dick, he said, "I assume you wish to know what Mackalvoy said to provoke me?" Seeing both men nod their heads. Damian sniffed. "He came to me and ripped my earbuds out before telling me that not only was my mother a whore, she simply did not love me. Why else would she abandon me with Father? I told him that it was not true, and he told me the only reason that both Father, Grayson, Todd, and even Drake have anything to do with me is legal obligation. That they do not love me. After all, who would?"
Dick's heart broke for Damian. He had no idea how one child could say such horrible things to another, let alone his adorable baby brother. At the same time, he was proud of Damian for not killing the other boy. His restraint had definitely improved.
Dick rested his hand on Damian's shoulder for a moment, knowing that that was as much physical contact the boy would allow. Giving Damian's shoulder a small squeeze, he sent Damian back to waiting room, hoping that both Tim and Jason would not try and goad some sort of reaction from the boy.
Turning to face the principal, Dick narrowed his eyes with lethal intent. The man had cast all the blame on Damian when the other boy had so clearly goaded his brother into reacting. How he hadn't spotted it was the real question.
In a low voice he asked, "Would you like to know what pisses me off the most?"
Mr. Kade swallowed visibly but made no move to respond. Dick took this as his queue to keep speaking. "My brother was assumed to be the instigator of this incident while the other boy was seen as an innocent victim. While Damian escalated it to physical violence, you can hardly blame him considering his history."
"I assume you're speaking of the history of violence?"
"No. I'm speaking about the history of both verbal and physical abuse at the hands of his mother and grandfather. Not to mention the neglect. Bruce had no idea that he had conceived a child with this woman, and she made no move to tell him until she thought she had the perfect son. Damian struggles with a lot of things because of that, and he tends to lash out more towards women because of it. Because his own mother didn't protect him. Those remarks would've made me punch the kid at Damian's age, and those comments hit a lot closer to home for him."
Mr. Kade remained silent for a moment. "I still have to suspend him. Two weeks."
Dick narrowed his eyes. "Only if the other kid gets at least three days suspension on the record, both children write an apology that you read and find appropriate, and you sign a nondisclosure statement about what you've learned about Damian today."
Mr. Kade blinked before smirking slightly. "I see why they call you a wizard at negotiation. That sounds entirely fair." Turning more serious he said, "I would've never said anything about Damian, even without the nondisclosure agreement."
Dick gave a small smile. "I get that feeling from you. But as you can imagine, I like to cover all my bases." Leaning back in his chair, Dick started to play with the buttons on his coat. "So, I'm assuming you saved the best for last. What did my dearest brother Jason do now? Ask about your sex life with Ms. Stratten again? Curse? Be tardy? Start a fight?"
"He asked about my sex life? And told you?"
Dick nodded absentmindedly. "Yeah. In a group chat with Tim and Damian. He thought it was hilarious that she gave him a two hour detention. Granted, he was trying to provoke her, but that's Jason for you."
Mr. Kade blinked in shock before shaking his head. "He was tardy, but the reason he was tardy is what brings you here today."
Dick sighed. "Joy. What did he do?"
Mr. Kade rubbed his temples. Dick wondered if this conversation was aging him as much as it was aging himself. "Your brother hung signs around campus stating that their was going to be a penis examination for all males in the school happening in the locker rooms. He even sighted some sort of bogus Health Code. We had guys lining up in two lines: circumcised and uncircumcised. Do you know how many parent phone calls I received about this today? About how their child didn't want to participate or that their penis wasn't 'orderly' enough to be inspected today? It was madness!"
Dick couldn't help it, he burst into laughter. When he calmed down, he asked between chuckles, "How do you know Jason did it?"
Mr. Kade rubbed his jaw. "We weren't able to catch him in the act or on security cameras, but a student swears up and down that she saw him wandering the halls today."
Dick drummed his fingers on his knee under the desk. "I have to say that that is circumstantial evidence Mr. Kade. While I'll readily admit that my brother is no saint, you have no damning evidence to tie him to this. Jason often wanders the halls. It's his way of rebelling. He's dropped off on time every morning, and he wanders the halls until he decides that he is suitably late for the day. Perhaps it was just a senior prank gone too far?"
Mr. Kade raised one eyebrow. "Your brother is a senior is he not?"
Dick smiled almost pityingly. "I never said he was involved, I just offered a possibility as to what happened. I'm sure the GCPD will allow us to run fingerprints on the flyers. If not, I have a friend who specializes in forensics in another city that will gladly take a look."
Dick really hoped that Mr. Kade would not take him up on the offer, and if he did, he hoped that Jason was at least smart enough to wear gloves. "While that is a kind offer , I'll have to decline. kI'd hate to waste the resources of the GCPD or that of your friend if it was simply a senior prank."
Internally, Dick breathed a sigh of relief. Outwardly, he gave Mr. Kade a small nod. "I assume that Jason will be allowed to return tomorrow?"
Mr. Kade sighed deeply. "As there is no way to prove him guilty, yes. Though speaking off the record, you don't believe him innocent, do you?"
Dick snorted. "On the record, I'll defend my brother until my dying breathe. Off the record, Jason is a little shit, and this is just the kind of thing that he'd pull."
Mr. Kade surprised Dick by bursting into laughter. "Glad my instincts aren't too far off the mark. Tim and Jason can come back tomorrow, I'll see Damian in two weeks. I'm assuming that one of the boys will drop off the nondisclosure agreement and the written apology?"
Dick nodded. "I'll be sure to give it to Tim."
Standing, Dick reached out to shake the man's hand. "If Bruce ever asks, this meeting was a yelling match, and you never want to see me again."
Mr. Kade raised an eyebrow. "Here I was thinking it went quite well."
Duck snorted. "It did, and therein lies the problem. Bruce finds out how well this went, and he'll send me to them every time one of the boys end up in here."
Mr. Kade chuckled and the two men walked out of the office. Immediately, the three boys jumped to their feet. Dick wrapped his arms across their shoulder and herded them out of the school, yelling a pleasant 'goodbye' over his shoulder.
As soon as they were in the car and on their way home, all the boys started talking at once. Dick whistled loudly to gain their attention. Once he was sure they were listening, he said, "Tim, you're back in school tomorrow. Damian, you have a two week suspension." Damian immediately started to protest and Dick had to raise his voice to be heard over him. "But, the other boy will also be suspended for three days and both of you have to write an apology to each other. Mr. Kade will read both apologies and make sure they are appropriate. I'll help you write it Little D. Jason, you will be back in school tomorrow, as all the evidence they had was circumstantial. But really Jason, penis inspections?"
Jason shrugged. "The idiots actually believed it too. All they had to do was look up the bogus health code I cited."
Duck shook his head and burst out laughing. His brothers were amazing even when they were being shit disturbers.
###
Bruce walked into the manor tiredly. It had been a week since Dick had called him in a frenzy at one a.m. And a week since Tim, Jason, and even Damian had called to tell him how amazingly Dick had handled the meeting with the principal.
Walking into the kitchen for a cup of coffee, Bruce was surprised to see Dick sitting there with a glass of wine and a book. Glancing up at Bruce, he gave the man a brief smile before returning to his book. Then he did a double take. Seeing that it really was his dad. He hastily put down his book and wine and gave Bruce a powerful hug. Bruce staggered under the sudden weight, but returned the hug just as tightly.
Bruce patted Dick a few times on the back to signify that he wanted to be released. "I heard what you did for your brothers. They told me that there was no way that Damian and Jason wouldn't have been expelled if it weren't for you."
Duck scrunched up his nose. Bruce could tell that under his tanned skin, Dick was blushing. "The evidence against Jason was circumstantial. And Damian was provoked, so it wasn't completely his fault. All I did was point it out."
"Well whatever you did, I'm grateful. Now, I have a business trip to Mexico planned in two weeks. It would be an honor if you would attend with me Mr. Grayson."
Dick couldn't help but burst out laughing. "Only if there's margaritas involved Mr. Wayne. And I get to hang out at the beach. Oh. And we have separate hotel rooms, I'm planning on having company at least once."
Rolling his eyes good naturally, Bruce said, "Fine, but only because I'm expecting company too."
Dick smirked. "Good for you, not letting age slow you down."
Bruce glared before snorting. "Whatever you say. I'm going to bed, I'll check out the new cases tomorrow."
Dick nodded, knowing automatically that he was referring to Batman's files.
Closing his book, Dick sipped the last bit of his wine and put the glass in the sink. Turning around, Dick headed up the stairs. His father certainly had the right idea. It had been a long week, filled with long nights and he was tired. It was definitely time to go to bed. Thinking back to the week he had, Dick smirked. At the very least, he had solved his boredom.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
A/N: So I just started writing, and this happened. Personally, I really like it, but I want to know what you think.
'
'
'
So here's my 'official' prompt list...let me know what you want to see next. Please feel free to add something not on the list!
Prank wars (multi-shot story)
Xmas
Valentine's Day
Alfred's Bday
Break ups (minishots how each of them went through bad breakup w/ help from bros)
Bruce be emotionally incompetent
Damian's first crush Zatannagurl
Assassins want Dick WolfGirl
Water gun battles turn into bad damian (league joins) dragoscilvio
Batbros captured by joker but argue so much that he lets them go Dragoscilvio
Dick/Jason go undercover at Arkham Dragoscilvio
Talia kidnaps boys WhenUniversesCollide
How Dick got each of his brothers RoseVered
Dick talks to commissioner about Barbara (p2 of chapter2)
Bruce is attached to female bc of business deal Ashuri (multi-shot?)
Alfred is gone for a week Ashuri (multi-shot)
Batbros react to (...?) Ashuri
Bruce/Dick fight, bros try to solve the problem(multi-shot)
Bruce forgets to pick up boys
Wayne family photoshoot