Author's Note- As promised here is the other chapter!

Chapter 36 The Impossible

I pushed my legs beyond their capabilities. I kicked up sand as my feet pounded heavily into it. Every grain of sand whipped the backs of my legs but I couldn't dwell on my discomfort. Somewhere far off I thought I could hear someone calling my name but I ignored it and pressed on. At first I was running blindly through the desert without any idea on where to go. But it didn't take me long to decide to visit the place where Muarim was buried. Perhaps talking to him would clear my head of all the madness that swarmed it.

I clutched my Bolganone tome tight to my side. The desert could sometimes be dangerous at night with thieves sometimes lurking in the shadows. Of course an enraged opponent with nothing to lose would hardly be a fair fight. With only the stars as my guide it took quite a while for me to find my destination. And it wasn't until I heard nearby voices that I realized I had arrived. Being careful not to be seen, I made myself invisible by freezing in place and crouching low. My heart jumped as I heard the unmistakable sound of a shovel digging into the sand. What's going on?

"Are we done yet? We've been out here all night and we still haven't struck a corpse. You sure this is a grave?"

"I don't know…the gray stone sticking out of the ground kind of gives it away. Of course it is you moron!" The shorter of the two males harrumphed in distaste.

"All I'm sayin' is that we've been diggin' for hours and have found not a single jewel! And if there ain't no body there ain't nothin' worth our while." The taller male ceased digging and stuck his shovel in the sand.

"For the moron that you are…I suppose you have some common sense. I guess you're right…there's no body which means nothing we can take. C'mon let's go." It was clear to me that I was eavesdropping on grave robbers. As I glared at them from afar I almost pitied them, they didn't have a prayer. It was a miracle that I hadn't subconsciously incinerated them already. They were going to pay for their disrespect to the dead and more importantly for disrespecting Muarim. Rage took me over uncontrollably and I could feel my skin turning a dark shade of red. I clenched Bolganone so aggressively I thought the tome would crumble in my hand.

"You're not getting away with this," I muttered almost silently. I watched carefully as the taller man yanked his shovel from the sand and beckoned his partner forward. Before they took another step I revealed myself from the shadows with a devilish smile on my lips. "Evening, gentleman," I said politely. The shorter man turned around to look at me and nodded his head. He stopped in his tracks and pulled on his companion's sleeve to bring his focus to me.

"What can do I do for ya?" said the shorter man. Although it was dark I could see the nervous bead of sweat rolling off his forehead. The light of the moon revealed his bearded face and short stumpy stature.

I carefully approached them, now that they had both stopped their movement. "Oh nothing…just figured I'd stop and smell the roses," I replied with a hint of humor in my voice. If I'm going to drive them away, might as well have fun with it.

The short man gave a befuddled look of astonishment. "But…their ain't no roses in the desert." I laughed mischievously and took a few steps closer to my prey.

"How very observant you are!"

The other man grabbed his companion's arm in frustration. "He's messing with you, ya twit! Now c'mon let's get out of here. I have a bad feeling…" I observed as the taller man led his partner away from me, but they didn't get very far. I jogged behind them and smiled again playfully.

"Going so soon?" They both stopped and stayed frozen in place. "I was hoping we could talk…but if you're in that much of a hurry…" The short man quickly spun around and vigorously shook his head.

"What'd you wanna speak to us about?" He asked with curiosity. I grinned in satisfaction.

"Wonderful! You choose the topic…it gets lonely out here in the desert…I'd love a quick chat!" It took everything I had to act lightly and not wring their necks. But I had to admit…I was beginning to enjoy myself.

The short man stared blankly into my seemingly innocent eyes. He looked around as if he were physically looking for something to say. "Er…what book you readin'?" I dropped my stare to my tome and laughed happily. The taller man eyed my tome suspiciously and upon realization of what it was, his eyes grew large.

"What a fantastic question!" I said cheerfully. The man's eyes lit up and he flashed a yellow and decaying smile.

"Ya think so?" he replied ignorantly. His companion gave me no chance to speak as he reached for his friends arm and began to scurry away.

"Quit talking to that boy! He's a mage! And a mage walking around in the desert at night means trouble for us!"

Again, I kept pace with them but this time without their realization. "A mage? Never heard of it!"

"By the Goddess you are dense!" I couldn't resist an audible chuckle as I listened to the grave robbers converse. Inevitably, my laughter reached their ears and both thieves turned around hesitantly. As they halted, I waved to them with a wide smile stretching from ear to ear.

"Hey there! I forgot to ask…did you find anything good in there?" I asked while pointing to the immense hole in the sand. Both of them bit down on their lower lip nervously. I could taste their fear just by watching their eyes grow bigger. "What? Is there something on my face?" They took two unsteady steps backwards until I finally dropped the innocent ruse I was playing with. I licked my dry lips and leafed through Bolganone to find the perfect spell that would burn them to the ground. "Do you guys like magic tricks?"

The short man clapped his hands together and nodded his head feverishly. "Ya mean when ya make stuff disappear with the snap of your fingers? Sure! I like magic tricks a whole lot!"

I laughed deviously. "Great! Then you'll love my tricks!" The man's eyes sparkled with wonderment. He leaned in closer to get a better look at me.

"What kind of tricks can you do?" he asked excitedly.

"Oh…a little of this….a little of that…nothin' special." The stumpy man looked at my open tome and then back up at me.

"I'll be the judge of that. Now lemme see these so called magic tricks!"

"As you wish…."

The other man wildly grabbed on to his companion and beckoned him to run. When he wouldn't budge he let out a long endless stream of curses. "Don't you get that he's not our friend? Get a move on! Run!" The stubby man crossed his arms in refusal.

"Not until I've seen these tricks of his," he replied.

"These aren't those kinds of magic tricks! He uses magic as a weapon, you fool! Run while you can!"

Despite his pleading, the round man stood his ground, awaiting my display of magic. Seeing no other option, the brighter of the two men finally tried to bargain with me. He kept his hands in the air and shakily walked towards me.

"What is it that you want from us? At least tell me before you do anything to us!"

In a split second I was holding the tall man by the collar of his shirt, trying desperately to hold back the urge to strangle him then and there. "I want to know who the hell gave you the right to dig up someone's grave? Have you no regard for the dead? Scum like you are the reason this world is so corrupt!" I spat.

"Whoa whoa whoa! Hold on there a moment! That grave was empty…there wasn't even a body. So technically…we've done nothing wrong," replied the tall man. I didn't believe him initially. How could Muarim's body just disappear? Things like that did not happen, they couldn't happen. Dead bodies don't just walk away…unless they weren't there to begin with…

"No body? You're insane! Of course there is one! What did you do with it? You sick disgusting worm…why would you take it? Is there no end to your ruthlessness?" My voice shook with wrath. The thought of somebody stealing a corpse sent me into a state of overwhelming rage.

"I swear on my life that grave was completely empty! Not a thing in there!"

"There's nothin'…just lots and lots of sand!" added his companion. I let go of the man's shirt and threw him to the ground with as much force as I could muster. He tumbled into the sand only to quickly rise up.

"I don't believe you…which is why I want you out of my sight! If you ever come here again…" I muttered a spell from Bolganone that caused the ground to quake and crack open with liquid fire spewing from the openings in the ground. I aimed it directly beneath the two grave robbers. They simultaneously yelped out in pain as their feet were singed mercilessly. They both cried in agony, unable to move away from the source of their torture. "I'll make sure this spell kills you both."

I turned away from their screams of agony, not seeing much point in watching them suffer. They won't die…I thought, but it's enough to keep them away. As scummy as they both were…someone would miss them if they died. And that was a pain I could never wish on anyone…not after what I went through….what I was still going through. I couldn't think of one person who deserved such a heartbreaking emptiness.

Soon the fire beneath them burnt out and the two grave robbers fled with a set of new injuries to deal with. I slowly made my way to the now open grave where Muarim was supposed to be. I knelt in the sand and craned my head over the dark hole. I lit a tiny bouncing flame in my palm to illuminate all I could not see. I instinctively winced, not wanting to see the cadaver of someone I loved. But I soon realized there was no need for any flinching because the grave robbers had told me the truth. The grave was empty. Absolutely empty. Muarim's body was gone.

What was I to think of such a thing? How did bodies go missing? It takes many more years for a body to decompose and even if that were the case…a pile of bones would be left behind to show evidence of it. As I continuously thought about it something crucial crossed my mind and it almost excited me. I had never seen his body…. completely still and breathless. Before I blacked out…Muarim was talking to me trying to give me advice that I never did heed. And that was it. I awoke in Sanaki's home and was just told he was dead. Not many details were given because my broken mind wouldn't be able to handle them. I was only told certain things happened…but I never saw any of it with my own eyes. Seeing is believing. Suddenly, a fresh idea rushed through my head. What if I was being fed lies? What if…the information I was given was inaccurate? If I was being deceived…then where was Muarim? He could be…alive. Muarim…could be alive. Alive! ALIVE!

I tried to fan the flames of my excitement but it was difficult. Of course there were other more likely possibilities. I supposed someone could have stolen the body…although I could not think of a single motive for such a sickening act. But there were sick people in the world…that much I knew. The only thing I could think to do was rush back home and interrogate Cade for the information he hid from me.

I stood over Cade as he slept soundly. I kicked him on his side with my hard boot, not showing much kindness. "Get up!" I yelled. He began to stir and moan as he was awoken from his deep slumber. He rubbed the sleep out of his eyes and looked to me tiredly.

"What is it now?" he grumbled. I glared at him viciously, with my eyes narrowing in contempt.

"Where is he?" I snapped.

"Where's who?"

I scoffed aloud and laughed deviously. "Don't act like you don't know! Muarim! Where is he? What did you do to him?" His eyebrows pulled together in confusion. He stared at me in bewilderment.

"Tormod…you know where he is. Did you have another nightmare?" he asked carefully. I laughed carelessly and rolled my eyes in irritation.

"No! I ran away incase you forgot."

"Oh yeah…that didn't last very long." I growled in frustration and kicked him again on his side.

"I came back because I made a rather interesting discovery…" I then explained exactly what I had seen moments ago. Cade's jaw dropped in astonishment. He sucked in a breath of air abruptly. Before he let the shock completely take him over, he refused to believe my find.

"You're lying…" he said breathlessly, his voice still thick with surprise. I shook my head irritably.

"No I am not. I was going to accuse you of being the liar but now I'm not so sure…" His reaction was genuine. As soon as I denied my story being a lie, his eyes twinkled with hope. I could tell he wanted to smile, as did I. But I wouldn't allow my hopes to soar quite so high.

"How can that be…? How can he just disappear?"

I ran my hand through my smooth red hair. "I don't know…but I'm going to find out even if it kills me."

With thousands of questioning thoughts looming over my head, I made the decision to solve the mystery that morning. I wasn't entirely sure where to begin with my journey but I was certain that I wouldn't begin until I had Sanaki's honest opinion. After a quick breakfast and a change of clothes, I was ready to go to Sienne. With Bolganone in hand, I breathed in the hot moisture ridden air of the desert. The sun was still low in the sky, but I already got the impression that the day would only grow hotter. I quietly observed the mountains of sand that provided the most spectacular landscape, well at least for me it did. I wouldn't trade the warmth of the desert for anything. Of course to an average person the temperatures were too extreme, but to me it was perfect. The thought of snow falling over Daien skies sent shivers to my spine. I never want to be that cold again. Images of snowy mountaintops and chilling winds nipping at my skin caused bumps on my arms to form. "Sothe if you were here…you'd be laughing," I said longingly, thinking of how I missed my friend's presence dearly.

"Talkin' to yourself?" asked Cade jokingly from behind. His sudden company made me jump from surprise.

"You got me," I admitted with only a bit of embarrassment. He hit me hard on the back and chuckled.

"Normal was never your thing anyway." I laughed and nodded my head in agreement. "So…where are you headed to now? If you're going back to Karoo…let me come. It's far from here and a dangerous journey to go on alone."

"No…this is something I need to do on my own. But, thanks. I'm actually going to see Sanaki first. Just to get her opinion."

"Why am I not surprised? Well, I know there's no stopping you because you're too damn stubborn and I just don't have the energy for it. But, make sure you come home with an explanation. I know if anyone can get to the bottom of this it's you."

I was a tad shocked to have Cade's acceptance. But I didn't question it, I just took it gladly. I gave him my widest grin and pulled him into a warm lingering hug. "Thanks Cade…for everything." I hugged him tightly for a few more drawn out moments and then finally let him go.

"I guess we're on good terms again?" he said with a smile. I returned his smile and held out my hand to him.

"Friends?"

He took hold of my hand and shook it firmly. "Friends," he agreed.

"When I come back…I promise I'll be me again, okay?"

He ruffled my hair with his shimmering chestnut wings. "I'll hold you to that."

When I arrived in Sienne I wasn't sure what it was…but there was just this tense feeling in the air…like trouble was brewing. Inside the cathedral I could feel the unease as well.

The usual guard escorted me to where Sanaki was. As we made our way, I wondered what Sanaki would think of my discovery. I also couldn't stop thinking where this discovery would lead me. I didn't want to think that someone could have stolen a body in the middle of the night but I supposed such things were possible.

We stopped half way down a long hall way and the guard opened a door. He gave a salutation to Sanaki and quickly scurried off elsewhere. I recognized the room as the library where shelves of books towered over me like buildings. Sanaki sat at her desk in the corner of the room with her head resting on her hand. Covering the desk were stacks of papers that appeared to be documents and such. She radiated enough stress for me to take notice.

I casually walked up to her and cleared the cluttering papers off her desk in one clean swipe. I hopped up on her desk and laid there on my stomach, hoping to amuse her. She sighed heavily and gave me a disapproving look.

"Oh hey! Didn't see you there," I said cheerfully. She forced back a smile and dropped her eyes to the mess of papers on the floor.

"This desk is not meant to be treated as a mattress, Tormod," she said.

"Hm…I was wondering where the pillows were." I stretched out further on her desk and rested my head on top of my hands.

"Get down from there…look at the mess you made!" she scolded. As her lip quivered I knew she was holding back laughter and I made it my job in that moment to force it out.

"No thanks, I'm pretty comfortable up here."

She rolled her golden eyes and stood up from her chair, arms folded. "Do I have to force you down?" She asked. I gave her a frown and a sour look.

"I'd prefer if you didn't."

She bit down on her lip to hide her smile. Then, she yanked at my leg that dangled freely off the side of the desk. I was shocked by her strength as she sent me stumbling to the floor. It took me a second to collect my bearings and get myself on my feet again. Once I recovered, I stuck my tongue out playfully. "You truly are the meanest Empress who ever lived."

"And you truly are the biggest idiot who ever lived." There was a silent pause and I watched satisfyingly as a cute smile stretched across her pink lips.

"Thank you!" I replied with too much enthusiasm. She stared at me quizzically then gave up her fight to hold back her laughter. Her laugh was like a song…full of harmony and pleasant to the ears.

"That wasn't a compliment," she stated.

"Yeah? Well it's as close to a compliment as I'll ever get from you!"

"True," she agreed blatantly.

After a few minutes of idle chatter I was ready to give her the news of what I had come across. That was until she brought up something completely different. It was her concern over Daein. When I asked her why she was interested in Daien she told me of her own radical suspicions. She had no proof of it, but according to her the occupational Begnion forces were abusing Daien's fragile post-war state.

My thoughts immediately turned to Sothe. I hoped he was unharmed and was somehow trying to avoid this mess. "I know Daien was put under Begnion's control after they lost the war but…wouldn't that benefit them? I mean they couldn't possibly stand on their own without an heir to the throne..."

"It should be that way, I'm not sure if you have noticed, but the senate is corrupt. And they are making the empire look like tyrannical oppressors. Bottom line…the senators can't be trusted…"

"So the occupational forces are strutting around like masters of the land without any regard for the people who call Daein home?"

"Something like that, yes."

Sothe…I wonder what you're doing right now…

"Is there anything we can do? I know the senators have as much of a say in this as you do but there has to be something we can do to stop this!" My voice became fiery because all of the talk about Daein kept me thinking about Sothe and how he was dealing with the oppression. I need to see him…I need to know if he's okay.

"I believe a liberation army has already been formed among the people. I've decided that I want to launch an investigation so I have my evidence. But before I announce one officially…I have a favor to ask of you."

"Sure, anything," I responded promptly.

"I want you and at least two of your best fighters to help this liberation army. I believe they go by the name…. the Dawn Brigade. Find out exactly what is going on and report it back to me. The information I know now is very limited but frightening nonetheless. Your help would be greatly appreciated."

My stomach fluttered as she asked me to take on such a responsibility. I was more than pleased that I could help her in any way. Of course the obvious reason I was so joyed by her request was the opportunity to find Sothe. I needed to make things right with him again…the past three years felt lacking because of our falling out. I longed to tell him how stupidly rash I was and how terribly wrong I had been about everything. I never intended to hurt him…ever. He saw me at my absolute worst…which was during the first few days directly after Muarim's death. Unable to handle the grief, I blamed my perpetual pain on Sothe. Somehow, I forced myself too see him as the antagonist who only wanted me to suffer. I was so blinded by my own sorrows that I couldn't even see that he was only trying to help me and save me from going mad. It wasn't until after he left that I knew I made one of the biggest mistakes of my life. Misery loves company as they say…

"Consider it done! When and where am I going?" I replied readily.

Sanaki breathed out a sigh of relief. "As soon as possible would be great. As for where…the Dawn Brigade is in need of more fighting strength so I would see you go to Umono, the largest working camp in Daein. There's no reason a Daein liberation army would not want to free the former Daein soldiers from that camp. I'm not completely sure…but it seems like a likely target and if they are not there, then you'll most definitely find traces of them along the way."

"Okay, but there's just one problem…"

"Is it too much?"

"No not at all! There's just…something I need to do first. It's a…personal quest."

Sanaki's eyebrows raised in intrigue. When she asked about my quest I told her all I had discovered from the previous night. "That certainly is odd. But what do you expect to find in Karoo?"

I shrugged my shoulders. "Don't know exactly…but I just have this feeling that someone didn't just go digging for bodies. I feel like there's a whole lot more to this than what meets the eye. Call me crazy but…I think…I think that maybe Muarim is somehow-"

A delicate hand on my shoulder stopped me from finishing my thought. "Tormod. I know this isn't what you want to hear but I saw him dead. Many of us did…the likelihood of him being alive is so terribly slim...it's pretty much impossible."

"But more impossible things have happened! I used to have a double who could shift into anyone he's seen! Tell me the likelihood of something like that happening!"

"Yes but…people don't just rise from the dead! I'm sorry if I'm coming off as harsh…but it's the truth. And I don't want you to get hurt…"

"I really do appreciate the concern! But…this is something I need to do. It won't take long…I promise. Once I check things out there, I'll be on my merry way to Daein! You can count on me!"

She shook her head in defeat. My stubbornness was always one of my more beneficial qualities and I could tell that I was tiring her out. "Is there no convincing you to skip the detour through Karoo?"

I smiled ecstatically, sensing the overthrown tone in her voice. "Nope, I'm going one way or another. And if there is nothing suspicious going on I'll leave immediately. You have my word."

"Fine. In that case…there's something I want you to have." She moved to the door and then turned around as she noticed my eyes following her curiously. "I'll be back," she assured me. My mind raced as I thought of what she could possibly give me. A tome, perhaps? I supposed there were several possibilities and I wouldn't know what it was until she came through the doors again.

Time felt like it was going by very slowly as I impatiently awaited her return. Pacing back and forth no longer subsided my boredom, so I began to look through her never-ending collection of books.

Taken off guard, I jumped as Sanaki tapped me on the shoulder lightly. "Back," she said sweetly. I turned around to see a long chest decorated with regal designs and shocking colors presented in her arms. She pushed the chest towards me, motioning for me to take it.

"Is it my birthday and I forgot?" I asked, dumb founded. She giggled softly and forced the chest into my hands.

"No…it's just something you might need for your journey," she said. "It's not getting much use around here and I thought maybe it will help you." I flashed her a toothy grin.

"Well…let's find out if it will!" I carefully unclamped the silver clasp and lifted the lid away from the chest. It squeaked a bit as I opened it, signifying its lack of usage. When I had the chest opened all the way I gasped at what was offered before me. Resting on white silk cushion was a beautifully made mend staff. My eyes lit up as I took in the spectacle. I had never owned a staff of my own before and finally I had one…and such a fine one at that! "No way…" I breathed. "For me?"

Her pretty pink lips stretched into a pleased smile. "Yes of course! Do you like it?"

Excitement and happiness bubbled up inside me with great aggression. I was just about ready to start bouncing up and down, thinking of all the people I could help. With the help of a mend staff, I wouldn't have to put a heavy strain on myself to heal injuries. I'll never have to watch anyone suffer again…because I can really help. I can help…

"Do I like it? I think I'm in love…" I gazed adoringly at the staff and then back at her. Her cheeks grew rosy and her eyes seemed to bounce with confusion. "With this staff! I mean look at it…wow! I've never had one…ever! I've used some of Rhys's but those were his staves…and now I've got my own. I swear I'll use it well!"

Her appealing smile shrunk as she let out a disappointed sigh. "Oh…that's very good to hear." I meticulously removed the staff from its resting place inside the chest and held it up in the air. I admired the glowing sapphire orb that sat on the tip of the staff.

"You're so beautiful…" I whispered. Again, I noticed the out of place rosiness on Sanaki's cheeks, wondering what was causing such a cute reaction from her. "Yes you are…my little staffy! The most beautiful staff there ever was!" For a second I thought I heard Sanaki grumble something, but it was almost inaudible. After observing the astounding quality of the staff, I warily placed it back in its chest and set it aside on a close by table. "Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Tha-"

"That's enough…I understand. You are very welcome." On a spur of the moment I decided to tackle her with hugs until she was gasping for a breath.

"I'm so happy I could kiss you!" I exclaimed. Her body stiffened in my grasp.

"Wh-what?"

I laughed carelessly and loosened my tight grip on her. Her liquid gold eyes caught my attention, as they always did. "Haha! It's just an expression, silly!"

"Oh…" A flush of embarrassment turned her face a crimson red. I couldn't help but to giggle at her oddly endearing reaction. I pulled her into another affectionate hug because a gut feeling told me I would be gone for a while.

"Thank you," I said gratefully. "I guess this is good bye…for now anyway." I pulled her in a little tighter and rubbed her back warmly.

"Let me get you any food you'll need for your journey. At least enough to get you to Karoo," she offered. Before I could object to her unnecessary kindness she had already detached herself from me and started towards the door. I was definitely going to miss her…but then again I wasn't sure how long I'd be away or what kind of trouble I would find myself in.

It wasn't long before she came back with a large canteen of water and a bag full of food. "You didn't have to do that…" I began.

"Don't think anything of it," she replied. I knew then I was ready to go. The

only thing holding me back from leaving was myself at that point. For one last time I took in her impeccable violet hair and her penetrating golden eyes. Her skin was flawless and her lips were so beautifully pink I could barely stand it.

"Well…I guess this is it. Try not to cry too much after I leave," I said jokingly. She giggled in amusement with her perfect smile stretching wider by the second.

"I'll try not to. But promise me you'll be careful and take good care of yourself." I laughed at her request.

"Oh please! Being careful is my middle name…. s."

"Hmm…we shall see."

We walked quietly together towards the steps of the cathedral that led to the wide hustling streets of Sienne. Again, the feeling that it would be quite a while until I returned struck me. Sienne itself was never my home but over the past three years I found myself spending just as much time there as I would in the Grann Desert. It might as well have been home at that point, but nothing was grander than the desert in its entirety.

The sun was still rising, with small traces of orange brush strokes still lingering in the sky. A low buzz of people passing by and chatting to one another filled my ears. The mind-blowing sight of structures towering so high above my head still had me in awe, the way they surrounded me on all sides, as if it were a shield of protection.

Suddenly, a pleasant voice disrupted my thoughts. "You know…you really shouldn't travel to Karoo on your own. Were none of your companions willing to go along?"

I smiled and shook my head. "They'd follow me anywhere but I asked to go alone."

She sighed exhaustingly. "Of course you did…"

I took a few reluctant steps down off the small staircase. I made the dangerous mistake of looking back and beholding her delicate yet sorrowful face, with her eyes down cast and her lips in a frown. I extended my hand out to her and she grabbed onto it nostalgically. She took a few steps down so we were level once again but this time hand in hand. "Hey if it makes you feel any better, I'll try not to get myself killed," I suggested awkwardly.

"You will do more than try. Never neglect your own limits…especially in a battle." I looked at her curiously, wondering what exactly was going through her mind.

"What makes you think I'll be in combat?" I asked.

"Nothing in particular…but travelling on your own could call for it."

"True…in that case I'm glad I had such a great teacher! I know I'll be fine…with everything you taught me and my pal Bolganone here…nothing can stop me!"

She tucked back a strand of hair nervously and began to blabber ceaselessly about any unlikely hazard I could face on my way. Her argument ranged from the dangerous animals of the desert to the desert's sometimes deadly climate. After a while, the jabbering tired my attention span.

"You know of all the locations of the oases, correct?" she questioned.

"Yes, Sanaki."

"Don't ever use the dunes for navigation," she warned.

"I'm aware…"

"Make sure you're aware of thieves and looters once it is dusk," she cautioned.

"Uh-huh…"

"Do you have enough supplies? Should I get you more?"

"Nope, I'm good."

"Shield yourself from the sun as best as you can."

"Sanaki! I've lived in the desert all my life. I know all this stuff!"

"Yes but when you travel alone you're more subject to-" I cut off her incessant driveling with something I never would have dreamed of doing prior, but in that moment I thought it would be the only way to silence her completely. I blocked off the speech of her mouth with my own lips sealed against hers, closing out the nonsensical words she wanted so desperately to say. I quickly detached my lips from hers out of the sheer need to catch my own breath and the grave realization of what I had just done. I considered running away at that point, with the fear of what she might say clawing at my back. Why did I do it? Why did I have to kiss her? Regretful thoughts scrambled through my head. But when I dared to take a peek at her face I was beyond delighted to see her cheeks growing rosy and an uncertain smile forcing its way to her lips.

My skin heated more intensely than any fire spell ever could. My stomach flipped and fluttered nervously. I couldn't help the fact that my eyes were bulging and it was beyond noticeable. I parted my lips to force myself to speak, but nothing I could think of would take back what I did. The sudden urge to bolt replaced my fearful nerves.

I acted on a whim and gently patted Sanaki on her head. "Enough time wasting, eh? I'm off!" And without another word I turned myself around and made haste to the massive expanse of the Grann Desert.

Not even the blistering heat could keep my mind off of the tingling in my lips or the flips in my stomach. I played the scene over and over again in my head, in hope that by the time I returned to Sienne I would have a decent excuse for what just happened.

My overly analytical thoughts kept me more than occupied for my entire trek to Karoo, so much so that I forgot about my need to eat. It wasn't until an angry growl came and interrupted my thoughts that I knew it had been too long since my last meal. Even though my body demanded it, it was rare for me to obey my grumbling urges. The constant unease in my stomach left the entire eating process almost completely unbearable and cumbersome. Ever since that day three years ago…I found myself eating only when the other option was to lose consciousness. Food often made me nauseous, but most of the time I was without much of an appetite anyway.

I hesitantly cracked open whatever food I had packed and nibbled at it only to calm the beast that constantly roared in my stomach. After a few bites and a few uncanny thoughts I packed the food away for later use. I took a few sips of water to cool off my overwhelming reflex to gag after eating. Soon, as the sun rose higher in the sky, a few sips became mouthful after mouthful.

Feeling the merciless rays of sun beating on the top of my head, I pulled my hood over myself to cast minimal shade on my face. It was better than the direct sunlight.

Through the remainder of my journey my thoughts constantly bounced back and forth between Sanaki and Muarim. Regret was soon wandering its way into my mind. What if the trip to Karoo wouldn't be worth taking at all? What if Muarim's body disappeared because of something natural? I started to believe, as the day grew hotter, that Sanaki was right. I was getting my hopes up for nothing. Did I actually believe that after three years of being dead…Muarim could actually be alive? It was impossible. She had to be right. With the sun beating stronger, my head swarmed with every negative thought I could think of.

When I had at least reached the oasis, and finished off my last canteen of water, I made a decision. Muarim was dead. That was a fact. "And there's nothing I can do to change that," I whispered morosely.

Karoo was in plain sight. If I had been able to bear walking all the way back, I would have turned around then. But there was no way my weakened legs would be able to handle the walk. My lack of food consumption after Muarim's death left me skinnier than I ever had been before. I knew such a thing would cost me during a battle, but it was still much too difficult for me to eat with miserable feelings all around me. There were many times when I thought back to my attempt to end my own life. Sometimes I would find myself silently cursing Sothe for stopping me and other times just the thought of me saying such horrible things to him made me wish I had died even more, to prevent hurting Sothe all together.

I kneeled down tiredly in the sand with blood rushing through my head. Without anything better to do I made the choice to explore the town a bit since I had made the effort to get there.

Overall, it hadn't changed much in the three years. It maintained a relatively healthy sized population with the constant humming of chatter and clumps of hurrying people. The only notable difference was the increase in vendors. The town was known for its market but in the three years I had been gone the number of vendors seemed to triple. There wasn't one street not littered with pushy merchants.

Walking through the heart of the town soon took its toll on me. Feeling drugged by the heat and lack of nourishment, I swayed where I stood. Dizziness overcame me and soon black spots were dancing before my eyes. My stomach let out another furious growl that I ignored. But it was difficult to ignore the burning and twisting feeling inside me.

A sudden urgent thought crossed my mind that perhaps my face would be recognizable after what had happened. I made sure my hood remained fastened over my head tightly. Then, my head buzzed unpleasantly as I felt my surrounding spin wildly. Before I understood what was happening to my body I felt the warm pavement underneath me.

My eyes slid closed naturally and I moaned dejectedly feeling the impact of not eating and the sweltering heat. I tried relentlessly to open my eyes but part of me was too weak and the other part of me was too blinded by the rays of the sun. "Muarim…Muarim…where are you?" I cowered.

Concerned voices echoed around me and I could sense a crowd of shadows towering over me, giving off some mild relief from the sun. Subsequently, the touch of a pair of hands on my skin sent a static shock through my face where they rested. I wanted to push them away but I felt too debilitated to do so. I knew the sensation of hands on my face would lead to the uncovering of my hood. I tried to prepare myself as the hood was pushed away from my face. As a last ditch effort I barely managed to open my eyes into little slits and squirm away from the hands. Why didn't I just eat? Have I actually become weaker in the three years? Those thoughts ran through my mind as I realized my legs weren't substantial enough to hold up my own body weight, which had decreased considerably. Through my struggle, I managed to shift onto my knees and gather Bolganone back into my arms and fasten my mend staff tighter to my belt.

The stare of a scruffy well-built man burnt past me. I looked at him dismissively and forced myself to my feet, only to come crashing back down to the ground. I hissed as I fell and sharp pain arose from my kneecap that donned a fresh bleeding cut.

"What should we do with him?" asked a stocky man kneeling beside the scruffy one. "There's something weird about him."

My eyes fretfully bounced from each nameless face to the other. Instinct told me to run, but my uncooperative body had other plans.

"Don't know. Should we bring him in? He could be useful…I guess." The instinct to run pounded even harder in my skull. I made another attempt to stand but a wave of wooziness pulled me back down.

"Useful? You sure about that? Besides…he's not the kind the master is looking for anyway. He's a little too…. human," the stocky man replied with a humorous tone of voice. Both men chuckled at his apparent joke.

"I'm not bothering anyone…I was just leaving," I added sheepishly. Both men gave each other an insidious look and shook their heads. Another menacing chuckle followed soon after.

"You're not gonna get too far on those skinny legs, boy! When's the last time you ate? Last year?" said the well-built man. I narrowed my eyes scornfully at him.

"This morning actually," I corrected.

The large man grunted. "Hm. Coulda fooled me."

"Pardon his rudeness. I'll tell you what, how about you come with us and we'll feed you until you're nice and plump. And to pay us back…you could do some…simple labor for our master. What do you think? Do we have a deal?" Asked the other man suspiciously. I raised an eyebrow at his obscure question. Simple labor? Master? He called me a human instead of a beorc. What's with this guy…. something is dangerously wrong here, I thought to myself.

"No thanks," I replied politely and this time I managed to pull myself to my feet by leaning on a stonewall close behind me. My breathing grew heavier from the physical strain it took to pull myself up. I could no longer deny the burning on my forehead that felt suspiciously like a fever.

"C'mon kid. If you know what's good for you, you'll come with us," said one of the men. I could no longer focus my eyes on anything. The most I could see were smudges of blurs. But when I felt hands latching onto my arms I immediately went into panic mode.

"No…get off of me! I'm not coming with you! Go!" I shouted frantically. I wanted terribly to call upon my magic and exterminate them but I couldn't find the strength to open my tome.

Both of the men took turns dragging me against my will. I wasn't sure where I was going for the path ahead of me was a whirling blur. It was such a horrifying feeling. Not being able to fight back. That awful helpless sensation. And who was there to watch my back? There was no one. I should have let Cade come with me, I thought remorsefully. "Muarim…Muarim!" I called out.

"Who the hell is that? The boy's gone and lost his mind!"

I don't know why I called out for Muarim. It wasn't like he was going to help me or even hear me. But if Muarim had never died…I would have screamed for him even louder. He never let anything bad happen. He always protected me…to the point where it cost him his life. No one could ever be what Muarim was to me and I needed him so desperately. A lone tear tumbled down my cheek. "Muarim! MUARIM!"

"Ah! Shut your trap, brat or I'll shut it for you!"

"Go easy on him…he's clearly psychotic. Just let him be, we're almost there."

"What's he to me?" A sharp pang to my gut knocked the wind right out of my lungs. I stumbled forward but the tight grips on both of my arms kept me from hitting the ground. I cried out in pain.

"MUARIM!" I screamed. Another burst of pain erupted from my side.

"No one's coming for you, kid!"

"We're just about there! Now cut it out, before you make a scene."

Muarim would have never stood for that. Muarim would have killed them…or worse. My vulnerability took me over. It was terrifying how much I was yearning for him and how much I longed for his strength. I've spent three years training and for what? To let these thugs carry me off somewhere? Instead of screaming for Muarim, I screamed words I remembered from the ancient language, not knowing what effect that particular combination would cause.

The crackling and snapping of flames and the rumble of the earth were the last noises I heard until I finally succumbed into complete unconsciousness.

When I reopened my eyes I immediately wished I hadn't. The room I was in was less of a room and more like a prison cell, one that held me captive for the first five years of my life. A room where loneliness and tears were my only companions. A room I never wanted to remember, but even at such a young age I retained every grueling moment spent there.

The walls were painted a dark crimson with a single window straight across from the twin-sized bed I found myself laying on. The main question that whizzed through my head was how the hell did I end up here? How was it possible? I knew Mother died during the attack, so who could have occupied the house now? Why was I…home?

Instead of asking myself more questions I made the hasty decision that I did not want to know why I found myself back in my own personal slice of hell. I just needed to escape and fast. That's all there was to it. I wouldn't linger about and wonder…I would just run away and find some other place to rest from where I was.

I took the obvious route and darted toward the window with a sickening feeling of fear and nausea swimming through my gut. And I couldn't ignore the abnormal burning on my flesh. I pulled the window from the bottom and tried to push it upwards as I forcefully as I could, but to no avail. The window was locked, on purpose I assumed. With a fresh idea in my mind, I chose to take the more outlandish route and punch the window open. But not without some careful planning. I quickly wrapped a white sheet around my fist so it would serve me as a shield from the shattering glass. Once I made my way back to the window I sent my protected fist spiraling toward the glass. However, before I made impact, an unseen force pulled my arm back.

"Now that isn't a very good idea!" came a feminine voice that I loathed. I turned around with horror shining through my crimson eyes. Whatever color was in my face to begin with, immediately drained when I saw the flaming red hair, porcelain skin, and ruby red eyes of my mother. A face I never thought I would see again. "What's wrong with you? Do you think me a monster? Come! Come! You're ill child, and you need your rest."

I never imagined hearing that voice again. That horrible voice I wanted to erase. I gulped nervously and my heart thumped loud enough for myself to hear. "But…you're supposed to be…" I began.

She fumbled with dishes of food and glasses of ice water but paused in the midst of it. "Dead? Hardly! I'm right here, aren't I? Try to contain your joy now, child for I never left you!"

"That's just so comforting…" I mumbled sarcastically. While uncovering plates of steaming hot vegetables and large servings of meat she laughed deviously. A delicious aroma filled the air causing my stomach to rumble.

"What was that? Oh…no matter! Come! Come! Although I've noticed you've grown…you seem to have shrunken in stature. No son of mine is going to be made of skin and bones! Eat! Eat!" She motioned for me to sit at a small table filled with vegetables and meats of every array. Even though my stomach burned from its core, I resisted the temptation to eat.

"I…I don't feel well enough to eat…" I admitted shyly.

She quirked one crimson eyebrow and approached me casually, placing her smooth hand on my cheek. "And what can I do to make you eat? I'll not watch as you wither away."

I pulled her hand away from my cheek and took one uncomfortable step back. "You can start by answering some questions."

She clapped her hands together. "Ah perfect! What might those questions be?"

"How are you…how are you alive? Everyone said…Sanaki said…you're….you're supposed to be dead! And all this," I waved my arms around me, "isn't supposed to exist anymore! So how? How! Tell me! What else is being held secret from me?"

"Hm…I thought you would ask! Well sit down…because I have much to tell you, my son." We both seated ourselves. I tried unwaveringly to avoid dropping my eyes onto the hot food before me that made my stomach curl and twist in hunger. "Well, now then! That spoiled brat you call an Empress put up a good fight…but she was no match for me, naturally. During the thick of the fight she had the upper hand. Even with that I could have annihilated her but after the entire scene you caused I didn't really want the entire Begnion Empire on my case. So…I opted to forfeit the battle, but not of course without letting that foolish girl believe she had beaten me honorably."

I stared at her fixedly, trying to piece everything together. "So…you only pretended to die so she'd leave you alone?" I inferred.

She clapped her hands thunderously. "Bravo! My son has a brain! Yes, those were my intentions. I mean…why should I change my way of life just because some little girl says to?"

Heat rose on my face from the anger that rippled through me. "You're way of life is wrong. You're wrong. Everything you do is wrong! I lost everything because of you…" Images of Muarim bloodied and breathless flashed across my eyes. An image of Sothe with a single tear streaming down his cheek haunted my thoughts.

"If by everything you mean body weight then I really can't take the blame for that!" She chuckled deviously with a wry smile spread from ear to ear.

I slammed my fists on the table, causing the china to rise and fall quickly with the sound of a small crash. "You know damn well what I mean!"

Her stature remained calm and collected. "Oh…do I? Is there something else I'm forgetting?"

"Muarim! You're the reason he's…he's…he's gone! I hate you…I hate you more than I ever have in my entire life. I don't care if your blood runs through me…I don't care! You took him from me!"

"Muarim? Ah! I hadn't realized it had a name! Well…with that cleared up I do believe you're precious Sanaki's Holy Guard saved me the trouble of killing him…if I remember correctly. Oh…but of course you would never blame her. No…I'm sure she made deal after deal with you just to clear her name. Yes…I bet she even concealed your agreement with a kiss! She wouldn't want you talking ill of her and the empire. Oh no no no! That would be most awful, would it not?"

"Stop! Just stop! You don't know anything about Sanaki or her intentions! She has a good heart…and I know she is sorry for what happened. But it's not like I need an apology from her. It was me the Holy Guard was after. Muarim was just protecting me…they never meant him harm."

"Ah yes…so in a technical sense the beast committed suicide and there is no one to blame! So please refrain from all this bitter talk, it's making me weary."

I balled my fists up with ferocity as I tried to conceal my rage. The beating of my heart thudded angrily. "You just don't get it! No…of course you couldn't. Muarim…he died so I could live…because as long as he was alive…he wouldn't let anything bad happen to me.

"Before I met some of my closest friends…Muarim was all I had. He took care of me…played with me...and he loved me. He was the greatest father I could have ever wanted. He was my best friend…and he promised he'd never leave me. And because of you, he had to break that promise because he always put everyone else above himself, especially me. And to be completely honest…after he died…I can hardly find a reason to smile anymore. So yes, you took everything away from me."

"My, what a moving speech! Did you rehearse that? It was very good!"

"You're a monster," I spat with contempt.

"Oh! What a hurtful thing to say!"

"What makes you think I won't be reporting to Sanaki now that I know you're alive?"

"Because I won't let you! How's that for an answer?" She crossed her arms with authority and gave me a wayward glance. My head pounded with pent up anger. I didn't bother asking her how she planned to confine me, for it was already plain as day to me. She had enough soldiers under her command to stop me and enough insight to know when I was plotting an escape. "Anymore questions? I do love answering them!"

I hate her…why am I here? What cruel fate is this? I knew what I needed to do, however. No matter how difficult it would be, I needed to escape. I anticipated having to take careful planning but it was a price I was willing to pay. Anything for freedom. But how was I to do it? Muarim did it once…so I should be able to as well. One thing was entirely certain; there wasn't any ounce of possibility that I would be able to devise such a plan in the presence of Muarim's true killer.

I took her up on her offer then. "Yeah there's one more question. I don't feel well…so would you mind leaving me alone for a little bit? So I can rest?"

She silently agreed to my request. As soon as the door clicked shut was when I commenced my strategy. As I racked my thoughts for any shred of genius, I was interrupted by the ferocious growl of the beast that was my stomach. I soon came to the conclusion that the only way to a clear mind for thinking would be to vanquish the beast that roared through my skin.

I hated every second of it, but I swallowed down enough food to settle me. It was enough to extinguish the burning and twisting feeling with its tight stranglehold. With that much accomplished, a wave exhaustion greeted me rather rudely. My eyelids grew heavy and before long I retired to the twin sized bed I once slept in as a very young child.

When my world at last went black I collapsed into an aggressive slumber from which it seemed impossible to wake.

A warm yet calloused hand stroked my cheek ever so lovingly. Vibrations of nostalgia swam through my skin with every electric touch. I could sense the immensely large size of the hand as it stroked me and not only that but it held a cool and damp towel to my burning forehead. The feeling of love and nothing but love enveloped me gracefully into a protective cocoon where I was safe from all harm. A sense of security left me feeling comfortably content in the warmth of my sheets.

The sheer sensation of such a warm presence granted me the ability to open my weary eyes and behold for myself who my caretaker was. When my eyes were opened I immediately took in the darkness that was around me. It was dusk. The only source of light was a flickering candle by my bedside. That lone candle with its faltering flame gave off enough of a glow to illuminate the face that possessively hovered over me with such love and care.

When I saw the face, I couldn't breathe. Why were rich golden eyes staring back at me? Why did the face don distinct green facial markings? And most importantly, why did I know every contour of that face? Tears glimmered in the pair of shocking gold eyes. Beautifully wet tears dribbled down a tan cheek. Real tears. The wetness stained my sheets.

A dream…yes it all had to be a dream. Or was it that I was finally going mad? Did it truly take three years for me to finally lose my mind? Suddenly, a voice changed the direction of my thoughts.

"Little one…oh little one…I am so sorry…"

I couldn't help it…but I wept openly at the sound of his voice that was thick with sorrow, all while knowing very well he could be an illusion.

"Muarim?" I choked. He outlined my thin cheekbones with his thumb and removed the cool towel to place his own hand where it was. The heat from my forehead transferred to his hands.

"I've hurt you…you suffer because of me. Oh little one…I never wanted to cause you such pain. Little one…"

Of all the dreams I encountered of Muarim this one felt the most real. His hand felt real and the moisture of tears felt even realer.

"What are you talking about Muarim? This is my dream…you haven't hurt me."

"No, little one…not a dream. Do you feel the difference?" He stroked my cheek again lovingly, sending chills down my back and happy somersaults in my stomach. I could feel everything so vividly. Even down to his hot breath on my face.

"Not a dream? Then what is it?" I asked doubtfully. He stroked his hand through my hair.

"It's reality, little one. I was never gone from you…never."

Author's Note- Now that I've successfully messed with your minds...you can await my next chapter :)