A/N: this is for everyone who sticks with me, not just as a writer.

"You're seriously going to a New Years Eve party thrown by the people we go to school with?"

"Yes, I am," Rory told Paris. "I'm bringing Jess and Lane is taking Zach here. We're gonna make a thing out of it."

"And you think this will be a good idea?" She could imagine the eyebrow raise her friend gave her through the phone.

"You don't?" She asked.

"Not if you consider who we go to school with," she scoffed.

Rory resisted a smile. "And what's wrong with who we go to school with, Paris?"

"What isn't?" She asked.

Now she did laugh. "Any other reasons you can think of?"

"Logan," Paris pointed out.

Rory froze. She felt herself build a wall up from the mention of her ex-something. "What about him?"

"What if he's there?" She questioned. "What if he and Jess interact?"

"So?"

"So?"

"I don't think I'll have to worry about that," she shook her head. "Jess doesn't know who Logan is and in case you forget, he doesn't randomly go up to strangers for a chat."

"And if Logan comes up to you?" She pushed.

"Then I'll deal with him," she said. "I can be nice to someone I was involved with. Remember Dean?"

"This isn't the same as Dean," Paris went on. "You slept with Logan. He has feelings for you. And you're going to a party he could possibly be at with your new boyfriend."

"I know all of this," Rory rubbed her forehead in frustration then curled her legs under her as she sat on her bed in Stars Hollow.

"Have you told Jess yet?" She asked.

Rory sighed, she knew what she meant. "No. Not yet."

Paris probably nodded on the other end. "Why not?"

"It hasn't been right," she admitted. "The stuff with his dad happened and you know what? He still hasn't told me about what happened."

"Is that what's bothering you?" She asked, in full therapy mode now.

"I don't know," she confessed. "Maybe. He has every right to his privacy. But I just - I wanted to help him and I have a crappy dad. Maybe it's not the same but it could do something maybe."

"That's a lot of maybe's," she commented. "You want my advice?"

"Does that it matter?" She joked.

"You need to ask him," she told her. "No more tiptoeing around the subject. Ask him about his dad and then tell him about Logan. You both can't keep these things inside. It's gonna come back to bite you in the ass."

"I don't want to push him," she said. When Paris asked why, she continued in almost a whisper but her friend heard her. "What if I push too hard and he leaves? If it was me, I'd bolt out the door. I don't want to lose him, not for this."

"Why do you think you're gonna lose him?" Paris wondered. "Because of before? Because he left Florida and he went to New York or is there something you're not telling me?"

"Because -" she sighed. "I don't know."

"Rory, if you're feeling insecure about anything with Jess -"

"I'm not insecure," she said. "I'm overworrying. The not knowing what happened makes me think something did happen."

"Something bad?" she could hear the frown.

She shook her head. "Just something. And we've been good, really good. This past month has been amazing. It's probably my mind telling me I'm too happy right?"

"Rory," Paris' voice softened, something it doesn't usually do for everyone and everything. "You have to tell him how you feel. Even if it's the tiniest thing, you have to tell him."

She nodded, closed her eyes and pressed her lips together. "Okay. You're right."

"Of course I'm right," she said proudly. "Who do you think you're talking to here, Gilmore?"

"Thanks, Paris," she said in a low voice.

"Anytime."

And she could tell her friend really meant it.

…..

Luke resisted the urge to tease. "You're going to Yale? For a new year's Eve party?"

"Quit it," Jess warned from the other side of the counter in the diner.

"I'm just asking," his uncle said. "But really, you're going to a new year's Eve party at Yale?"

"Yes," he answered. "Go on. Get your comments out."

"I have no comments," he told him. "It's just unexpected."

"Rory wanted to go," he explained. "Some of her old roommates from freshmen year invited her so I offered to go so she wouldn't be alone."

"And what if she goes to talk to someone?" Luke wondered. "You'd be okay alone at one of those?"

"I've been to parties before," he pointed out. "And Lane is coming, too. She's bringing her boyfriend."

"So if Rory leaves to talk to someone, you're just gonna be a third wheel to Lane and Zach?" He asked.

He imagined the idea and frowned. "God, I hope not."

"Do you think she told Lorelai yet?" Luke lowered his voice.

Jess shrugged. "I'd guess but who knows? Christmas was pretty packed."

"Christmas was more suspicious acts from the elder Gilmore's since they canceled their holiday party," he pointed out.

"Which led our significant others to make a Christmas week of festivities," Jess said in a monologue tone.

Luke smirked at him. "It's times like this when I see the relation between us."

Jess chuckled at that. "I'm just going along with Rory. She calls the shots for holidays. If it was up to me, we'd stay home, get a little drunk and -"

The look on Luke's face cut Jess off. "You forgot who you're having this conversation with, didn't you?"

"Little bit," he admitted with a smirk.

Luke left behind the counter and went to help new customers that had just walked in. Jess leaned forward in one of the stools. His shift had just ended for the day which was why he was casually bugging his uncle instead of working.

He wondered if Rory was home right now or if she had plans. Jess decided maybe he would go out instead of sitting around and being interogated. Upstairs sat his jacket, the denim one Rory had given him as a late birthday gift.

That night still stood out in his mind. He really didn't expect any of it. Hell, he hadn't expected her. It was too cold our today to wear, the end if December cold bit too hard for denim. Instead, he grabbed a more weather appropriate jacket, green with a kind of puff to it.

He shoved his hands in his pockets and found that paper with the California address on it. Jess stared down at it, unable to process it. That paper was kind of an escape route. To escape his mother, her new husband, the fear of failing classes, being stuck in a diner job even if he didn't hate it. There was the fear of writer's block and worst of all, the fear of disappointing or hurting Rory.

But to go to Jimmy Mariano to escape all that? What if that was the cause for the hurt and disappointment? What if that was the reason he failed the classes or couldn't get ideas for his book? What if it was reason he stayed in the small town with the diner job? He wasn't sure if anything anymore . He sure as hell wasn't sure if he should use this address.

Quickly, he shoved the paper back into his pocket. With a sigh, he headed back downstairs, now with his jacket and avoided the looks he got from Miss Patty and Taylor who now had a table in the diner. He wasn't in the mood for lewd comments or judgements.

…

"Mom?" Rory walked out of her room and stood in her doorway.

"Yeah, kid?" Lorelai looked at her from her seat at the kitchen table. She had papers and folders spread out in front of her.

"You're working," she stated. "I don't want to to bother you."

"You couldn't bother me," she smiled. "What's going on?"

"Tomorrow is New Year's Eve," Rory began.

"Yes," Lorelai nodded. "I'm aware. What about it?"

"Jess is taking me to a party at Yale," she said. "With Lane and Zach."

"Oh," she seemed surprised.

"So we can't do our usual binge watch for the holiday," she continued.

Lorelai nodded. "Oh."

Rory moved herself out of the doorway and sat in front of her mom. "I'm sorry."

"For what?" She asked. "You're twenty years old. You can go to a party if you want to, kid. You don't have to stay with your mom."

"Really?" She wondered.

Lorelai laughed once and brushed the hair away from her daughter's face. "I think I raised you to be close to me if you don't see that."

"Oh," Rory frowned. "So it's really okay?"

"Sweets, my firstborn and only born, I love you but you are allowed to have a life outside of mommy," she answered.

Her daughter smiled at her. "I was worried."

"About what?" She found herself asking.

"You don't think -" she paused then continued. "You don't think anything's changed between us, right?"

"You know," Lorelai sighed. "I'm gonna be honest. A month ago, I was worried that it was. It felt like you were slipping away a little bit. Partly because you have Jess and this new life."

Rory interrupted. "I don't have a new life."

Lorelai shook her head. "I know that now. Back then, I felt kind of left out. I thought you were getting too old to share things with me and that maybe we wouldn't be as close anymore. But it's been over a month now and I know it was just the start."

"What do you mean?" She asked curiously. "The start of what?"

Lorelai reached out and held her daughter's hand in hers. "It was the start of your relationship. It was falling in love and worrying about approval. It's that honeymoon phase that if you're with the right person, it lasts forever. It wasn't you swaying away from me. It was you balancing me and Jess."

"And how'd I do?" She smiled.

"You did great," she smiled back. "Next time, I'm gonna worry less though."

"Next time?" Rory chuckled lightly. "As in a next boyfriend? Because I think this is it."

She smiled even softer at her. "That you feel that strongly, hun, I want it to be it for you."

"I do," she nodded. "It is."

"It's really good to hear that," she admitted.

"Yeah?" Rory wiped at her eye, not noticing a stray tear had fallen.

"Yeah," Lorelai squeezed her hand tighter. "You love him and I know you're both still so young but I see you two. You two look at each other like me and Luke look at each other."

Rory squeezed her hand back, another tear dropped. "Thanks, Mom."

"There is one more dilemma, though," she pointed out.

"What dilemma?" She sat up straighter in her chair, worried.

"You're going to a party on a definite kissing holiday," Lorelai stated. "We need to find you the perfect outfit."

Rory beamed at her mother brightly. "You got any ideas?"

…..

The drive down had been easy but traffic filled. To say Jess hadn't gotten frustrated with some of the other drivers was an understatement. Each time he felt his temper flare, Rory reached over and would rub his leg in comfort.

They didn't notice Lane's eyes on them as she sat in the backseat. Zach kept quiet, unsure what to say. He didn't know Jess well but he still wasn't sure what to say to hold a conversation with him and the girls together. When they finally got there, the place was decorated so much, you'd have thought it was a Hollywood party.

Rory gasped in surprise at the gorgeous lights. Jess smirked as he let her out of the car and once again, he took in how stunning she looked. Her dress was silver and it shined with a sparkle. It was skinny straps and the neckline had a small V but enough to be noticeable. It felt to above her knees and was just right for her to move. He felt a sense of pride in knowing not only was that his date but his girlfriend.

Inside the four of them got drinks. Of course there was alcohol which Lane stayed away from. Over a year ago, she'd been at a party where she called her mother and told her about her then-boyfriend Dave and prom. After that, she tried to stay away. Zach grabbed her a soda from the ice cooler and she smiled in thank you.

Jess grabbed himself a beer and gestures to Rory. She began to shake her head but then to her boyfriend's surprise, took his bottle in her hands.

They were soon greeted by people Jess did not know. Rory seemed to know them, she called one Janet and he assumed it was one of the girls who had invited her to the party. They gasped over her dress and Rory finally introduced Jess. He shook their hands and smiled and they gave her a look to show they approved.

…..

"Hey."

Rory slid into the seat across from Jess at one of the lone tables. "Finally free?"

She looked around first before she answered. "For the moment, yes."

"You seem very popular tonight," he commented.

Rory laughed. "No, I don't. I just keep running into people I know."

"Isn't that part of the popular definition?" He asked.

"I'm sorry I keep being taken away," she sighed.

Jess made a face as he shook his head, a face that said he understood. "Price I pay for having you as my girlfriend."

She crossed her arms with a smirk. "And what price is that?"

"You," he nodded towards her. "Gorgeous, friendly girlfriend who happens to work on the newspaper and is insanely talented."

"Uh-huh," she nodded in disbelief. "And what about you?"

"What about me?" He asked.

"You," now she nodded her head towards him. "Handsome, antisocial boyfriend who is secretly writing a novel."

"I'm not writing in secret," he defended as she raised her eyebrow at him. "I'm writing and not showing anyone, there's a difference."

"Uh-huh," she smiled. "When can I read it?"

"When it's finished," he told her.

"You know," she leaned closer to him. "I have ways of persuading you."

"You think so?" He leaned closer, too.

She nodded, a playful look on her face. "I know so."

"You know, I could be convinced now if you really want to read it," he replied.

"Hmm," she pretended to think. "You sure you're up for it? I can think of a few things that will really convince you."

"Considering you're halfway there just from that dress alone, I have no doubts you'll win," Jess said.

Rory blushed. "Really?"

"Have you seen yourself?" He asked her. "You look amazing. From the first second I saw you, I had to stop myself from lifting you over my shoulder and taking you somewhere very private."

"Jess," she blushed redder.

Suddenly a voice shouted, a voice she recognized. "Rory Gilmore!"

"Who's that?" Jess asked her, seeing his girlfriend froze, no longer the blushing or teasing girl she'd just been seconds ago.

"Um -" she began as the owner of the voice came closer.

"Rory!" The unmistakable Australian accent rang clear in his voice. "My, how lovely to see you!"

Rory stood up and faced him. "Finn! Hi."

"How are you, darling?" He asked her as he hugged her.

"I'm good," she hugged him back. Jess watched curiously and when she backed away, she gave him a quick look. "You?"

"I'm quite well," he told her. "We've missed you around. Where have you been, love?"

"Busy," she replied.

"Busy?" He wondered.

"Uh, Finn," she grabbed his arm and faced him to Jess. She motioned for Jess to stand so he stood up, wiping off his pants as he did. "This is Jess, my boyfriend. Jess, this is Finn. He's a part of this group I wrote a piece about for the Daily News."

"Ssh, love," he teased. "We can't tell everyone about it, can we?"

Rory laughed. "Right."

Jess held out his hand for Finn to shake it. "Nice to meet you."

"You, too," he turned back to her after they pulled apart. "Have you seen Logan this evening?"

"Logan? No, I - I haven't seen him," she shook her head. "Why?"

"I'm sure he'd love to see you," Finn explained.

"He's here?" She froze.

"Somewhere," he looked around past her head to around the room. "I seem to have lost him in the crowd."

"Oh, I'm sure he'll turn up," she laughed uncomfortably. Jess noticed but said nothing.

"I'll be sure to tell him I spotted you," he told her. "Right now, I see Rosemary over there. Maybe tonight she'll finally give me a chance."

"Good luck," she patted his arm as he headed off in Rosemary's direction.

"So Finn's a friend of Logan's?" Jess asked once he was gone.

She slowly turned to him. "Yes."

"Huh," he sat back down.

"What?" She sat down, too. "What's that 'huh'?"

Jess shrugged. "It's nothing. Just you seemed cozy with your ex's friend, that's all."

"Jess," she said his name so differently than just moments before. "We're not cozy. We're friends."

"So that you and Logan - that you slept with him, has nothing to do with the friendship?" He asked.

"No," she defended. "It doesn't. I met Finn before anything happened between me and Logan. We were friends before it."

Jess nodded once. "Right. Of course."

She looked at him puzzledly. "Are you jealous?"

"What?" He was sure if he had a drink right now, he'd have spit it out. "Why would I be jealous? Because you're friends with a friend of a guy you had sex with?"

"Ssh," she said as she glanced around. "And yes. Come on, this doesn't seem like you."

"And what am I?" He asked.

"You're not this," she held her hand, palm out towards him. "This guy right now, he's not my boyfriend."

"Huh," he said. "That's good to know, isn't it?"

Jess stood up and she shot up with him. "Where are you going?"

"I think I'm gonna take a walk," he told her.

"Wait," she said. "We need to talk. Don't do this. Not tonight."

"Rory, I'm just taking a walk," he told her.

Her eyes shined as he saw her tear up. "Don't go."

"I'll be right back," he promised, voice softer than before. "Just...I need a minute, okay? I need to clear my head before I say something stupid."

"Okay," she nodded. "Okay."

He leaned forward and kissed her on the forehead before he turned and walked away. As Jess disappeared from her sight, Rory sank back down into the chair she had been in. Her eyes looked around the room and landed on the one and only Logan Huntzberger. She looked away quickly and wiped at her eyes.

Once her eyes were scrubbed as fresh as she could, she stood up with more confidence. She needed to find Lane.

A/N: I did not originally have that end scene play out like that. It got a little away from me but what's literati without moments like that?