Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. I do not.

A/N: As usual, I'd like to extend a special thank you to each and every one of you who read and reviewed the last chapter. As you know, your feedback means the world to me. So, thank you for taking the time to push that little button at the end of each chapter. And, of course, I'd like to thank those who reviewed anonymously. Since I can't send you a personal reply, I'd like to thank the following: Lara, AnonymousAussie, ace3, Hayley, Paola, Kayla and teamjake13. Your kind words are so inspiring. And last but not least in the thanks category, I'd like to thank my best friend Christine for her feedback. And, last but certainly not least, I'd like to thank the best collaborator in the world, Neha. Check out some important info in the A/N at the end of the chapter.

CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR

Oh God! I wanted to die. I'd never felt so miserable in my life. I felt like shit. No, scratch that. That wasn't even a remotely good comparison. Every part of my body ached. My head was pounding and my eyes hurt.

I groaned when I sat up in bed, painfully aware that I was cold and alone. Not that I expected Jacob to stay with me. So much for that "talk" we were supposed to have. Then again, I didn't remember much of what did happen last night. So, maybe we did have the talk and I just forgot. Damn it! How much did I have to drink? I groaned again as my head throbbed from thinking too much. Apparently, even my inner dialogue was too loud in my hung-over state. How the hell did I get this bad?

It all started when I got off the phone with Jacob last night. It was a short conversation, but it succeeded in taking me on a roller coaster ride of emotions. When Liz invited me to the party, I didn't want to go. It just wasn't my scene. I didn't drink, I didn't dance. Come to think of it, I also didn't seem to know how to have any fun. When I realized how boring I'd become, I told her I'd changed my mind and that I would go with her. When she suggested I invite Jacob to come along, I was even more enthusiastic. I realized that it would be a perfect opportunity for us to try to have some fun together. So, I called him. That's when the roller coaster ride began.

When he first told me that he couldn't come because he had to work, I was so disappointed that I could've cried. He just wasn't making an effort with me and it made me feel like our relationship was a lost cause. Then he seemed to change his mind and told me he could make it if I didn't mind him being late. I almost jumped for joy at that. Until I realized that he was probably going to bring Embry and Quil along. Then my mood sank again.

I loved Quil and Embry. They were my family. But, they had accompanied us everywhere Jacob and I went for the past two months. I didn't like the idea of having chaperones. I didn't think that Jacob did either. But, it was hard to tell, considering he was just as uncomfortable with them around as he was when he was alone with me. Of course, he then assured me that he was coming alone and my spirits soared, only to be dashed to pieces when he brought up the "talk."

The dreaded talk. As soon as I got off the phone with him I was terrified. Sure, all I had wanted was for us to talk, to figure out what had been bothering him and why he'd been so distant with me. But, as soon as I realized I was going to finally get what I wanted, I was scared. Edward had asked me for a talk once, and I ended up abandoned, lying on the forest floor. Needless to say, I was anxious about seeing Jacob.

My heart told me that I was being ridiculous and overly paranoid. I had never experienced anything like the love that Jacob and I shared. We belonged together. Every fiber of my being knew it. But, my head had other ideas. I mean, what was I supposed to think? He had been pushing me away for months, avoiding any and all explanations as to why he was acting that way. And then, out of the blue, he was being accommodating and wanted to talk. I panicked. What if he was trying to end things between us?

Liz had picked up on my negative vibe and offered to help me. I didn't want to air out all my dirty laundry, so I just told her he that I wanted to look irresistible to Jacob and that I wanted it to be impossible for him to keep his hands off of me. Secretly, I was hoping to remind Jacob of all that he'd be missing if he was trying to break up with me. Liz just saw it as a chance to play dress up. I had Liz help me pick out the sexiest outfit I owned. She helped me do my hair and apply my make-up. I had to admit that I was pleased with the end result. I felt sexy for the first time in a long while.

By the time Liz and I got to the party, I was a jumble of nerves. I couldn't think straight. All my self-confidence flew out the window and I was paralyzed with fear. I just knew that Jacob's arrival would signal the end of our relationship. And, I was in no position to cope with that. So, when Liz offered me a beer, I took it. I had hoped the alcohol would help dull my senses. I would need that if I was going to face my worst nightmare. One beer turned into three and then four and I kept at it until my mind grew fuzzy. The last thing I remembered clearly was dancing with Liz when Jacob approached me. I remembered jumping into his arms and kissing him like my life depended on it. After that, everything just kind of went black.

My stomach gurgled uncomfortably and it brought me back to the present. I couldn't believe how miserable I felt. I vowed then and there that I would never drink again. I threw off the covers so that I could head into the bathroom, and was shocked at my attire. I was wearing one of Jacob's shirts that I kept on hand to sleep in, along with a pair of granny panties, usually reserved for that time of the month. I scrunched my eyes in confusion because I knew for a fact that I hadn't worn those panties last night. I also realized I wasn't wearing a bra. I couldn't remember undressing myself, and if I did, why on earth would I have needed to change my underwear? A blush crept over my skin as I realized that someone else must have undressed me. I had to assume that it was Liz. And frankly, I didn't think we were that close. I thought I would die of embarrassment. She probably thought I was a total lush now.

As if on cue, Liz waltzed out of the bathroom and walked towards me with a knowing smile on her face. "Well, good morning, sunshine!"

I dropped my head in my hands and whispered, "You don't have to yell, Liz. I'm sitting right here."

She shook her head and laughed. "Oh sweetie, you look miserable. Here, let me get you something."

She walked back into the bathroom and came out a moment later with a large glass of water and some aspirin. I took her offered gifts and smiled appreciatively. I didn't realize how thirsty I was until I saw the water. I downed the pills in one gulp and chugged the remaining glass as quickly as possible. I already felt better. At least, I didn't feel like I was going to die anymore.

"You're not going to puke are you? You don't look so hot." Though I knew she was genuinely concerned about me, I couldn't ignore the tone of her voice that said she cared about me, but not enough to pick up my puke.

"No," I answered quietly. "I don't feel sick so much as just…well, terrible doesn't quite cover it."

Liz seemed to anticipate my needs and quickly refilled my glass, handing it to me before sitting down on her bed. I couldn't shake the feeling that I had been a complete wreck last night. "I didn't do anything too embarrassing, did I?"

Liz replied with a smirk. "No, you weren't too bad. I mean, it's not like a certain someone was complaining." She wiggled her eyebrows suggestively.

I drank some more water until I realized her eyes were still on me. I turned towards her and found a mischievous grin plastered on her face.

"What?" Her staring was making me uncomfortable.

"You talk in your sleep," she replied.

My face turned beet red. I was pretty sure that I hadn't been talking much in my sleep as of late. I hadn't been dreaming much either and that's usually what led to all the talking. I would think that had I been talking in my sleep prior to last night, Liz would have mentioned something sooner. I was worried about the kinds of things I would talk about in my inebriated state. "Oh God, what did I say?"

Liz giggled. "Nothing too surprising. I mean, you were mumbling a lot of 'Oh Jakes,' but that's to be expected, right? You guys looked a bit hot and heavy last night. It looked like your seduction plan worked perfectly. I hope you made good use of the room."

"Obviously not if he couldn't be bothered to be here when I woke up." The bitterness in my voice shocked even me. Liz's smile faltered. She glanced at the floor by my bed and then back to me. She got up and picked up a piece of paper.

"Well, it looks like he left a note. It must have fallen after he left." I took the note from her outstretched hand and read it eagerly.

"Hey Bells.

I'm sorry I couldn't be there when you woke up, but I had to rush home to get dressed for my tutoring session in the library today. I didn't want to wake you because you looked so peaceful and I know you need the rest.

I have to work this afternoon, but I should be off by dinnertime. We really need to finish our talk. I'll call you later. I love you.

Jake."

I read the letter three times before I could even comprehend it. I racked my brain trying to remember the "talk" we'd had the night before, but my mind was blank. But his letter seemed so loving and so…well…Jacob. I could hear his voice through his words, the voice I'd longed to hear over the past two, lonely months.

I looked up and noticed that Liz had been eyeing me thoughtfully. "Bella, what's wrong? You look like someone just drowned your puppy. You looked freaking hot last night and Jacob was all over you. Your outfit worked. You had him eating out of your hand. I mean, he looks like he knows what he's doing, right?"

I chuckled. "Yeah, he used to."

"Oh my God! I knew it!" She bounced up and down excitedly. "I knew Mr. Perfect had his kryptonite! So, what is it? Is he a selfish lover, only wants to get himself off?" I was thrown. Liz looked so eager to get the scoop on Jacob.

"Oh, God, no! He's the best. I mean, he's the only. I mean, no, all he does is give."

"Damn it. He is perfect," she muttered under her breath. "So, what's the problem then?"

I shifted uncomfortably in my bed. In the month we'd been roommates, we'd slowly gotten to know each other. But, we had yet to delve into deeper topics. She had proved to be a great friend though, and I figured now was as good a time as any to let her in on my emotional turmoil. I could use all the support I could get. My silence made Liz uncomfortable and she said, "Hey," she said. "If it's too personal, don't worry about it…"

"No, it's not that. It's just…"

And so I started spilling my guts. I told her about the pregnancy scare and how everything changed with Jacob after that. I told her about how our once hot and amazing sex-life had dwindled into something non-existent. And then I told her about how I was ready to spontaneously combust from all the sexual frustration. I finished off with how I couldn't remember a damn thing that had happened between Jacob and me the night before, but that based on the fact that I didn't wake up sweaty and naked next to Jacob, I could only assume that it was just more of the same between us.

"Wow," was Liz's stunned reply. "No wonder you've been Miss Cranky Pants lately."

"Thanks," I replied sarcastically.

"I'm sorry. This is going to sound wild and far-fetched, but I have to throw this out there. Have you talked to Jacob about this?"

I rolled my eyes. "Yes, constantly. But, he's been so distant, so evasive. I don't know. Maybe he's seeing someone else."

"Honey, please!"

"What?" Okay, I didn't really think he would ever cheat on me, but I was out of ideas. Liz looked at me like I was crazy. And, I'll admit, I felt a little crazy.

"Bella, your man is gorgeous, smart, and funny. Any girl would want him. Hell, I want him!"

I glared at her, immediately suspicious of her motives. Was she trying to tell me that she was going after Jacob? I warred with my own inner monster that wanted to reach over and rip her throat out. I didn't know whether to be furious or impressed with how brazen she was about her intentions. She must have seen the anger in my eyes because she held her hands up instantly.

"Easy there, tiger. Let me rephrase. I admit. I have a harmless crush on your boyfriend." The monster within roared in anger and I could swear a small growl escaped my throat. "But," she continued, ignoring my reaction. "You know I would never do anything to try to steal him from you, don't you? Not that I could if I tried…"

"What do you mean?" I was having a hard time processing it all.

"Bella, I could traipse around this room, butt-ass naked, and he wouldn't see anyone but you. I would kill to have someone look at me just once, the way Jacob looks at you every day. You may think the fire is gone, but I saw the two of you together last night. No, he's not seeing someone else. But, you won't ever know what's bothering him until you talk to him. And I mean really talk to him. Now, go take a shower. It'll help clear your head."

I got out of bed slowly. I didn't want to jostle my brain more than necessary. I stood up and found that my whole body ached. I didn't feel nauseous, as of yet, but I didn't feel good either. Liz lounged on her bed reading a magazine while I gathered some clean clothes and made my way into our tiny bathroom.

I let the hot water soothe me. The heat felt amazing. It always reminded me of what it felt like being wrapped up in Jacob's embrace. I couldn't get Liz's words out of my head. I felt so pathetic that I couldn't remember anything about last night. I found it hard to believe that Jacob had been all over me. If he had, I certainly missed out on a lot. I growled in frustration and turned the water off. I got dressed and figured I'd try to blow dry and style my hair so I looked somewhat presentable when I saw Jacob later that night. I was applying some lip gloss when I heard a panicked knock on the door.

"Bella, are you decent?" Liz's voice came out as a harsh whisper.

"Yeah, I…" But before I could finish my sentence, Liz came barreling through the door and closed it behind her. She fell against the door and her face was flushed.

"Liz, what's the matter with you?"

"Alright, Bella, spill it! Who is Edward and why haven't you mentioned him before?"

"Edward?"

She rolled her eyes. "Oh, don't play coy with me. Yeah, Edward! You know, god-like, reddish brown hair, a crooked smile that could make your panties drop…Edward. Now, who is he?"

"How do you know about Edward?" I stuttered.

"Well, maybe because he's waiting for you right outside this door."

I groaned. Edward had heard everything Liz had said, not to mention what was going on in her head. Though, knowing Liz, she probably wouldn't be all that embarrassed that Edward had heard her had she known it was a possibility. She'd probably repeat it to his face if I dared her. I admired that devil-may-care quality about her.

"Um, Liz, you may want to keep your voice down. Edward's got great hearing."

"Oh who cares?" She turned towards the door and whispered softly in a seductive voice, "Oh Edward, you're so gorgeous I just want to rip your clothes off and have my way with you." She turned back to me with a smirk. "There, do you think he heard that? Now, stop avoiding the question. Who is this guy?"

I was embarrassed for her. "Well, he's my friend." It was the truth. Okay, I knew it wasn't the whole truth, but I hoped it would suffice. Of course, Liz was a smart girl.

"Your friend my ass. I heard the way he talked about you. Now, tell the truth…the whole truth."

"Alright, God, is this the Inquisition?"

"No, I don't torture for answers. I just pester incessantly. So, spill it already."

I had opened up a lot to Liz already that day. I'd already laid out all my issues with Jacob. I wasn't prepared to go into my Edward history, which, if I was being honest, could probably fill up four novels. Of course, had Edward not been in the next room with super vampire hearing, I might have been more forthcoming about my past with him. Edward was having a hard enough time dealing with our break-up. I didn't want to drudge up the past for Liz and throw it in his face. So, I tried to stick to the basics.

"Well, we used to date."

"Yes, and," she urged me to continue.

"What? That's it. We used to date and now we're friends."

She eyed me shrewdly. "He was your first love, wasn't he?"

"Well, I…uh…yeah, he was."

I didn't expect her next reaction at all. "Unfreaking-believable! You mean to tell me that you've dated not one, but two of the most gorgeous guys in the world? Jesus Bella! Ever heard of sharing the wealth?"

I stared at her in stunned amazement, then shook my head and chuckled. I could always count on Liz to tell me exactly what she was thinking.

"So," she said in a suggestive tone. "Did you three ever…?"

"Ever what?" I asked, genuinely confused by her suggestive tone.

"You know…you're three gorgeous people, with gorgeous bodies…I'm just saying that with the right kind of music, in the right place, maybe if you all had a bit too much to drink…you never know."

"Oh, God Liz! You can't be serious!"

"What? I was just curious? People experiment in college you know…"

Liz was exasperating, yet I couldn't hold back my smile. I grabbed her by the arms, turned her around and shooed her out of the bathroom. "Liz, go!"

"Alright, alright," she opened the door and I was about to close it on her when she stuck her head back in and said, "Bella, since Jacob doesn't want to pose nude for my art class, why don't you ask Edward if he will?"

My mouth fell open. "You asked Jacob to pose nude?"

"Well, yeah. Not for me personally, you know. It was for the benefit of my classmates."

I rolled my eyes and gently pushed her. "Liz, get out of here."

"Fine, fine. It was worth a try. I'll leave you alone with Edward. See you later."

I took a few deep breaths and looked at my reflection in the bathroom mirror. My face was flushed, but that wasn't really anything new. I was more concerned about the lasting effects of my hangover. I didn't want to deal with Edward's preaching, especially when I was missing Jacob so much and my head was pounding incessantly.

I opened the bathroom door to find Edward looking through the books on my desk. His back was turned towards me when he quipped, "So, Liz is…interesting."

I smiled and walked past him, settling on my bed. He pulled out my desk chair and sat down across from me. It was genuinely nice to see him. It was rare when he had a chance to visit. Medical school kept him busy in Seattle. And, though he didn't need to sleep, I obviously did, which limited his availability to see me.

A lot had changed over the past two months, and not just between me and Jacob. Though Alice had said the Cullens, minus Carlisle and Esme, would follow Edward to Seattle, they never really got around to it. Instead, they collectively decided to take time off from school to pursue their own endeavors.

Jasper decided to do some writing on the Civil War. Since he was actually, personally involved, he possessed a unique perspective. He was known to write impressive dissertations and submit them anonymously to various journals. Of all the siblings, he found the high school and college scene the most tiresome. He saw this break from school as an opportunity to do his own thing for once. Not to mention it left him more free time to train and work with the wolves.

Alice kept herself busy searching the world for potential allies in our war against The Volturi. Since she was mostly blind where I was concerned, she focused her visions on Carlisle and his many acquaintances throughout the years. Whenever she had a vision, she'd contact Carlisle and he and Esme would then make yet another stop on their world tour.

Rosalie and Emmett…well, they mainly focused on themselves. Emmett liked to spend his free time finding ways to annoy and pester his siblings. When he wasn't doing that, he got a kick out of helping Jasper with his battle strategies and messing with the wolves, namely Jacob and Paul. It thrilled him to know that he knew just what buttons to push to make them angry. I wasn't really sure what Rosalie did in her free time, but it was clear that she thrived off of her freedom. Of course, it didn't escape my notice that their new-found freedom gave them more time and opportunity to watch over me. I was fine with it, as long as they remained unobtrusive. And, thus far, they had kept their distance.

After we caught up on what his siblings had been up to, we ended up talking about school for a bit. But I could tell he had an agenda for this particular visit. "So, what really brings you by today, Edward?"

"What, I can't just pop in for a visit?"

"You know you can. But you look like you want to say something."

He sighed. "How is it that I'm the one who can read minds, yet you're the one who always seems to know what I'm thinking?"

"I guess I'm just special."

He nodded in agreement. "I just wanted to see how you've been. Alice has been worried about you."

I folded my legs underneath me and rested my chin on my palms. I was about to say that I was fine, that there was nothing to worry about. But, I knew Edward wouldn't buy it. So, I tried to change the subject. "Have you heard from Carlisle and Esme?"

Edward flashed me his crooked grin. I wasn't putting anything past him, but it looked like he was going to humor me for a little while longer. "They're doing well. After they left Ireland, they spent some time in South America. And, now they're in Romania."

"Do you really think they'll find enough allies to go up against The Volturi with us?"

"Well, Alice sees that they will. And, you know I don't bet against her. In the four hundred plus years of Carlisle's existence, he's met some powerful vampires. In fact, The Romanians he's meeting with now were actually in power before The Volturi. They're still bitter about how they were overthrown. Alice is confident that they'll do just about anything to get back at Aro. They're pretty creepy. But, I'd rather them be on our side than anyone else's."

"So, we have a chance then?"

"Bella, there's always hope. Sure, Alice can't see what The Volturi have planned, but we're not going to let anything happen to you."

"I know, Edward. And I can't tell you how much I appreciate it. You guys really are my family." I meant it with all sincerity, but I saw a flash of pain in Edward's eyes when I said it. It was yet another reminder that I'd rather think of him as a brother, rather than a love. He recovered quickly though.

"Bella, are you going to tell me what's wrong?"

Clearly he wasn't going to let this go. I was exhausted and hung-over. I had already talked things through with Liz. I didn't want to rehash all my raw emotions with Edward. I looked into his golden eyes and said, "Nothing, really. I just had a lot to drink last night and now I have a huge headache."

He frowned disapprovingly. "Yes, well, Alice mentioned that you had a pretty wild night. She would have come to check on you herself, but your future disappeared and she knew Jacob must have shown up. I assume he took good care of you then?"

I wanted to say yes, of course he did. But, I was embarrassed to admit that I couldn't rightfully remember. I did make it to my room safely though. And, according to his letter, Jacob had stayed with me all night. I also couldn't forget that Liz had mentioned that Jacob and I had been all over each other, whatever that meant…

"You're hesitating, Bella. What's going on with you? I promise you can tell me anything."

I don't know what it was about me that morning, but I was compelled to spill my guts first to Liz and now to Edward. I was desperate for a confidante. Jacob used to be that for me. But, he wasn't there. He was never there, and I needed him. I felt a tear fall from my eye and in a flash, Edward was by my side, sitting next to me on my bed with his arm thrown over my shoulder.

"Shh, love, don't cry."

I couldn't help it. The floodgates had opened and there was no way to close them. "Oh, Edward, it's just that Jake's been so distant lately. I don't know if he's just lost interest in me since the whole pregnancy thing, but I just feel so alone."

Edward stiffened. I knew he was uncomfortable with the topic. In truth, I didn't want to lay that particular burden on him. But, I felt like I had no choice. I needed someone to talk to about it and I knew that Edward would listen, regardless of how much it hurt him. I cried even harder realizing that I didn't deserve him as a friend. I was being cruel and selfish. He pulled me closer, wrapping both arms around me and pressed my head against his chest. My tears spilled down and drenched his shirt. Between sobs, I was able to force out, "Liz thinks I'm being crazy, but I can't help but think that he's seeing someone else."

Edward growled angrily in response and then his hand rubbed up and down my back soothingly. "Bella, I know I haven't made things easy for you two. But, I've seen his mind. He's physically and emotionally incapable of cheating on you. You mean everything to him. You just have that effect on people."

He chucked my chin playfully and gave me a reassuring look. "Have you talked to him? Have you really asked him what's wrong?"

"I've tried. But, I haven't gotten anywhere."

"That doesn't sound like you, Bella. You're the most stubborn person I know. If you want an answer, you don't stop until you get it."

I nodded my head and let his hold tighten around me. His familiar scent was comforting. My voice was a strangled whisper. "I guess I'm just afraid to hear the truth; that it really is over. If I keep this up, if I keep pretending that things will just resolve themselves, then at least it isn't over."

Edward held me while I sobbed against his chest. It was at that moment that I realized I was repeating my mistakes. After my disastrous eighteenth birthday party, I felt Edward pull away from me. In his mind, he had already left me that night, even if he remained physically in my presence. I felt him slipping away, but I did nothing to stop it. I was too afraid. I was afraid that if I confronted him, the truth would come out and he'd leave me.

Obviously, my fears did nothing to change the outcome of that scenario. I stayed silent and he left anyway. I argued constantly with Alice about her over protective ways, saying I wouldn't be ruled by fear. The Volturi weren't going to prevent me from living my life. And yet, here I was letting fear of a broken heart prevent me from talking to the one person I loved most. I was being an idiot.

I sat up and wiped the tears from my eyes. I wasn't going to be a weak observer of my own life. Truly living meant being an active participant. I was hurt and I was angry. But, I was also determined. I was going to make Jacob talk to me. I was sick and tired of these games and I was going to let Jacob know it. I turned to Edward who had been eyeing me solemnly. "So, you're going to talk to him," he said matter-of-factly. I nodded. "Good. I hope everything works out for you, Bella. I really do."

He stood up resting his hand on my shoulder as he looked down into my eyes. "I'll be in Forks until tomorrow night. I'll be hunting tonight, but if you need me, you know you can just call."

"Thank you." He gave me a tight-lipped smile and walked out of the room.

I looked at the clock on the nightstand. It was a quarter to twelve. If I remembered correctly, Jacob's tutoring session would be finished by noon. He was then going to work the rest of the day and I wouldn't see him until dinner time. That wasn't good enough for me. I needed to talk to him, immediately. I had put it off long enough.

I checked my appearance in the bathroom. I splashed some water on my face to wipe away the tracks of my tears. The cool water left a healthy blush on my pale skin. I tucked my loose hair behind my ears and reapplied my lip gloss. I was ready to find Jacob. So, I marched out of my room and out of the dorm, heading across campus to the library. Jacob had been meeting with his tutor for a couple of weeks. He wasn't doing that poorly in Accounting, but he decided to be proactive and get a tutor to ensure he didn't fall behind. I was proud of him. It showed real maturity to know when to ask for help. If only he could have shown the same maturity with our relationship.

As I walked through the large quad in the middle of campus, I was blind to everyone and everything around me. My mind was focused solely on what I was going to say to Jacob. I didn't have any clever speeches prepared. When it was all said and done, I'd probably just barge in there and say, Talk to me you idiot! And then I'd stand there, I wouldn't budge or take no for an answer until he talked to me. It wasn't very creative, but it would definitely get me the results I wanted.

I walked into the library, past the reference desk and into the building's atrium. It was a three-story building with a number of computer labs and private rooms. He could be anywhere and I worried that by the time I figured out where he was, he'd have left already. I thought carefully. If I were Jacob, where would I want to study? Then I noticed the bright light shining down from the atrium windows. The sun was bright and there wasn't a cloud in the sky. I hadn't noticed what a beautiful day it was on my walk over here. Jacob would want to be outside as much as possible on a day like this. So, I walked towards the back of the building where I knew they had a patio filled with tables and chairs. If Jacob was still here, that's where he would be.

I pushed open the patio door and looked around. The tables were set up in a semi-circle on the patio. I looked to my left and saw a couple of tables occupied by lone students. Then I turned to the right and breathed a sigh of relief when I saw Jacob. He was wearing a tight black t-shirt with a pair of dingy looking jeans. He always wore those when he was going to work. He liked to reserve his darker, better looking jeans for when he was with me. His head was bowed in concentration over his book. He looked…beautiful. His hair was getting longer and it looked a bit shaggy. He would need another haircut soon, unless he planned on growing it out again. I was so caught up in what I saw, that I nearly forgot why I was there in the first place. I told myself to keep my head in the game and to stop focusing on his beauty. That had always gotten me into trouble with Edward and I had already decided that I was going to learn from my mistakes. I walked with purpose, determined to get my man back, one way or another.

All of a sudden, my step faltered as if my body sensed what my eyes couldn't see. I finally glanced at Jacob's tutor and a wave of nausea swept through me. Gorgeous wasn't an accurate word to describe her. Stunning, beautiful and pretty all fell shy of the mark. This girl was a goddess who could give Rosalie a run for her money. I looked down at what I was wearing; my uniform of a casual t-shirt, jeans and my tennis shoes. Then I looked up at the impeccably dressed creature next to Jacob and cringed. She had long, golden hair that fell down her shoulders in soft curls. Her make-up was subtle, but it accentuated her flawless features. She wore a low-cut tank top and though I couldn't quite see since her body was hidden by the table, I'd wager she was also sporting the tightest pair of jeans imaginable. Her hands were perfectly manicured and a pair of strappy sandals adorned her feet. Who dresses like that for a tutoring session?

The real kicker wasn't the clothes she was wearing, but the way she angled her body so that her breasts pushed up and out of her shirt. She was leaning into him, so closely, that she was practically sitting on his lap. She pointed to something in his notes and he laughed, which made her giggle like the mindless hussy she was. She even tossed her hair back and batted her eyelashes at him. Anger flooded my veins. I took another step forward and Jacob's eyes finally met mine. At first, his mouth broke into a brilliant smile; my smile. But, then it wavered and a look that I didn't quite recognize dominated his face. Was it guilt?

"Bells," he jumped up in surprise. "What are you doing here?"

The harlot shot me an annoyed glare, but I chose to ignore her and focus all my energy on Jacob. "I…I wanted to talk to you," I managed through clenched teeth.

There was that look again. Now I knew he looked guilty, and I could swear he hung his head in shame. My heart started pounding out of my chest. What could possibly make him look so guilty? I was afraid to find out.

"Oh, sorry Bells." He motioned towards the blonde casually. "This is my tutor, Shawna. Shawna, this is my girlfriend, Bella."

Girlfriend. It was a perfectly acceptable word. I'd never had a problem with it before. But, at that moment, in light of the fact that my whole world was about to fall apart, the word just seemed so small and insignificant. I was more than that, wasn't I? I was his life, his love; the missing piece of his soul. And he was mine. Yet, to this trollop, I was just a girlfriend.

Shawna flashed me a fake smile and said, "Nice to meet you Bella. I've heard a lot about you." Her voice was saccharine sweet and rivaled Jessica Stanley's on a bad day. Though her smile remained intact, her eyes narrowed as she surveyed me up and down, sizing me up. There was a challenge in her eyes. I knew without a doubt that this girl wanted Jacob. I couldn't help it. The most primal part of me rose up to that challenge. I stared her down and said, "Yeah, well I wish I could say the same."

I immediately turned to Jacob. "I need to talk to you, in private." He practically tripped over himself to follow me. Shawna looked put out. I just glared at her as Jacob excused himself and told her he'd be right back.

He followed me back into the library and I led us to a secluded corner behind some reference stacks. I turned around and looked at his face. His head was down and he couldn't meet my eyes. My stomach clenched, boiling with anxiety. Maybe it was worse than I thought. He really was cheating on me. I wanted to yell, scream, accuse. I wanted to tell him how he was breaking my heart. But, I didn't get the chance.

"Bells, honey, I know you must be mad. I'm so sorry about last night. I didn't mean to take advantage of you. It's just that, after we talked, you were so forgiving and so…loving. I just couldn't resist you. It should never have gotten that far. Not like that. I'm sorry if I made you feel…"

"What the hell are you talking about?" I couldn't conceal my anger. What talk? What does he mean he took advantage of me? As if that were possible. I trusted him with my whole life. Or, at least, I used to. Now I wasn't so sure. And he wasn't exactly addressing the issue at hand, which was the big-breasted tramp who was throwing herself at him mere moments ago.

He stuffed one hand in his pocket and the other one he raked through his hair nervously. He took a step towards me and lowered his voice to just above a whisper. He glanced around making sure no one would hear him. "I'm talking about last night when we…almost…"

Jacob Black was actually blushing. He looked at me, nodding his head suggestively as if that would somehow make me understand what he was talking about. "When we almost what?"

"You mean, you don't remember?" I couldn't tell if he was relieved or hurt by that revelation.

"Jake, all I remember is getting drunk off my ass, you showing up at the party, and then me waking up alone. Again."

He flinched and recoiled at the anger in my voice. His big brown eyes were wide and vulnerable. I forced myself to look anywhere but those eyes, as they were likely to douse the flames and make me forget all my anger and all my pain.

"I don't understand, Bells. If you don't remember what happened, then why do you look so angry?"

I clenched my fists, fury nearly blinding me. "Well, I have a number of reasons for that. But, let's just start with Shawna and why you look so damn guilty!"

"Shawna? What about her? She's my tutor." He had the audacity to look completely innocent.

"Right, she's your tutor. She's just your tutor who looks like a Playboy model. Have you even seen what she's wearing? Her boobs are hanging out and she's desperately trying to push them in your face. I'm supposed to believe that you picked her solely for her business acumen?"

Jacob took a step towards me, his mouth breaking into a subtle grin, which only succeeded in infuriating me more. He tried to wrap me in his arms, but I swatted his hands away. I didn't want to fall into his comforting embrace. I needed answers. He sighed loudly. "Bells, I didn't pick her. She works at the tutoring office and helped me fill out my application. She called me the next day and said she was assigned to me. What was I supposed to do?"

"Then why didn't you tell me about her. You've been meeting with her for weeks, at all hours of the day. You never once said that your tutor was female, let alone every guy's wet dream."

He laughed and bit his lower lip. I narrowed my eyes at him in defiance. I was not going to let his sexy quirks divert me from my anger. But, this time he was too quick for me and he was in front of me, his hands caressing my face, before I had a chance to push him away. "Honey, I didn't tell you because it never crossed my mind. I don't see her like that. She's just a girl. She's helped me with my class and that's all. You're the only one I see. She can't compare, especially when you look so adorable when you're jealous. It's a real turn on."

I yanked his hand away from my face. "Then you're a fool. I saw the way she looked at you when she didn't know I was watching. And, the way she looked at me, like she was taking stock of her competition. She wants you Jake."

He looked at me dumbfounded. "Well, even if that was true, I don't want her. I only want you."

"Really?" I scoffed. "You could have fooled me. You haven't even touched me since Christmas. If you aren't getting it from me, maybe you're getting it from someone else."

He looked stricken, like someone had punched him in the gut. Then his expression changed to one of fierce determination. He stalked forward, backing me up against a bookcase. His hands caressed my face and he stooped down to press gentle kisses to my forehead, cheeks and nose. When his lips softly grazed over my own, I began to melt into his touch. He pulled away before he could deepen the kiss and whispered in my ear, "Bella, I know I haven't been good to you lately. I don't have an excuse. But, I want to explain. I want to make it up to you. Please, let me." He continued leaving a trail of wet kisses down my neck and I was left breathless.

His kisses were getting more passionate. My knees were weak and I found myself clinging to his shoulders and arms like a life line. This is what I had been missing from my life. I felt his tongue brush against my lower lip and I knew I would be done for if I didn't do something quick. I didn't want him to think that a few kisses would make up for two months of silence. I pulled away and said the first thing that came to mind. "You know, Edward was right. He said you weren't cheating on me."

Jacob froze like I'd poured a bucket of ice water over his head. "Wait a minute. You were talking to Edward about me; about us?" He released a low growl and I saw a bit of the ferocious wolf he fought to keep contained. I glared at him. "Oh, now look who's jealous. Of course I talked to Edward," I snapped back angrily. "Who the hell else was I supposed to talk to? Where have you been?"

His anger dissipated quickly at my angry tone. "You're right, Bella. I've put you through so much already. Look, I don't want to fight." He looked down at his watch. "Honey, I have to finish up with Shawna. Then I need to get to work. Can we finish this…"

"Yeah," I interrupted him, and idea forming in my head. "Actually, we are finished here. I have something I want to say to Shawna anyway."

I took off and ran through the library back out to the patio. I didn't even take the time to look at Jacob's shocked expression as he ran after me. I found Shawna where we'd left her. She was adjusting her bra, making sure her breast were exactly where she wanted them. She pulled out a compact from her purse and proceeded to admire her reflection, while a manicured nail straightened the outline of her lipstick. It took her a while to even notice that I was standing in front of her, seething with rage.

"Oh," she said in a wicked voice. "Leaving so soon?"

"Bells," Jacob called from behind me and held my arm gently. His voice was worried. "Honey, come on, let's…"

"Uh oh," Shawna looked between me and Jacob. "Trouble in paradise?"

I glared at her haughty face. I didn't even know who I was anymore. I wasn't the shy, passive girl who was going to let this tramp walk over me to get my man. I also had two months of pent up sexual frustration driving me. This girl had no idea who she was messing with. I placed my hands, palms down, on the table and leaned down so that Shawna and I were at eye level.

"Shawna," I said sweetly. "I know what you're trying to do here. You can toss your bleached hair and thrust out your fake boobs all you want. The way you're dressing and the way you're throwing yourself at Jacob is beyond desperate. It's pathetic. It's my bed he comes to at night." Okay, she didn't need to know that it had been a rare occurrence as of late. But, I soldiered on and renewed my attack on this threat to my happiness. "You can walk around naked in front of him, but you'd be wasting your time. You see, Shawna, you're overlooking one important fact. Jacob is mine. I just thought you'd like to know that before you really embarrass yourself."

Shawna's mouth opened in shock. She looked like she wanted to say something back, but she was at a loss for words. I glared at her and turned around towards Jacob whose eyes looked like they were going to bug out of his head. There was a definite hint of lust in his stunned gaze. I tapped him angrily on the chest with my finger. "And I'll talk to you later." I then walked away and left the love of my life behind, tongue-tied and confused.

I was so full of crazed energy that I didn't know what to do with myself. I didn't have to work and I didn't want to stay cooped up in my room all day. So, I decided I'd go visit Alice. Maybe she could give me a way to channel all my frustration so that I could have a civilized conversation with Jacob rather than sounding like an insane banshee. I was embarrassed about my behavior in front of Shawna. I'd never felt so out of control, yet, at the same time, I felt a swell of confidence at how I defended what was mine. Of course, I didn't really think of Jacob as my property, but his heart belonged to me. And, I realized that day that I would fight like a wildcat to keep it. Jacob just needed a strong reminder of that fact.

I got to my dorm room, picked up my purse and keys and headed back out on my way to Forks. Half-way into town, I realized I was low on fuel and stopped to get gas. I checked my cell phone and saw about ten missed calls from Jacob. I figured it would be best to call Jacob back right away to try to smooth things over. I was afraid he might be angry with me. After all, he did act like Shawna was his friend. I decided to suck it up and called him anyway. The phone only rang once before he answered.

"Bells"?

"Yeah, Jake. Look, I'm sorry for…"

"Honey, that was the sexiest thing I've ever seen." He growled huskily.

Well, that wasn't the response I was expecting. "Huh? I mean, what?" I stuttered, completely taken off guard. He chuckled at my discomfort.

"Bells, you were right. Shawna was totally into me. I never noticed before until today. As soon as you left, she tried to tell me that I could do so much better than you."

I growled at that piece of information, while Jacob continued laughing. And here I thought I had been too hard on the girl. Apparently, I hadn't been hard enough.

"Don't worry. I told her how insane she was and that you were the most beautiful woman I'd ever seen. I told her, in no uncertain terms, that she could fuck off."

I was stunned that he gave up his tutor for me. "But Jake, your Accounting class…"

"Already taken care of. I rushed over to the tutoring office and got a new tutor assigned already. And, just so you know, he's the shortest, scrawniest, geekiest guy I've ever met. We're going to look like David and Goliath whenever we walk into the library. He's seriously going to hurt my cool factor. It's going to be humiliating."

He was really playing up the sympathy factor, and I couldn't help but laugh along with him. It was strange to hear us laughing together after so long. He must have noticed too because he immediately fell silent. After a quiet moment, he spoke up again.

"Bells, I know things have sucked between us lately. And trust me, it's all my fault. It had nothing to do with you. But, I want to make it up to you. I want to explain everything. Billy and Rachel are going to be out tonight. Please come over. We'll have the house to ourselves. I really want to talk everything out with you."

There was a loud commotion on his end. "Oh, sorry, honey. I really need to get back to work. Please say you'll come over."

"Yeah, I'll be there."

"Great." I could hear the smile in his voice. "I'll see you tonight."

"Okay, I'll see you then."

I was about to hang up when he said, "Oh, and Bells? I love you." And then he hung up leaving me smiling and breathless. I pulled out of the gas station and headed back onto the highway towards Forks. I felt reinvigorated, for the first time in a long while. Jacob hadn't been angry with me about my blow-up with Shawna. Instead, he was turned on by it. There was hope yet and that filled me with joy.

I arrived at the Cullens' house a few minutes later. I parked my car in the driveway, behind Edward's SUV. I was hoping that he had already left to go hunting. After all, I was planning on asking Alice for advice, and I didn't want Edward around when I did. I walked up to the porch and raised my hand to knock when the door opened abruptly and Jasper appeared on the threshold. He looked agitated and uncomfortable.

"Uh, hey Jasper."

He took one look at me and groaned miserably saying, "Hi" and "Bye," then sped off into the forest in a blink of an eye.

"Bella," Alice called from inside. "We're in the kitchen. I know you're hungry." My stomach growled in response. It was at that moment that I realized I hadn't eaten anything all morning. My hangover and my confrontation with Shawna had taken a lot out of me. I knew that if I wanted to have the energy needed to face Jacob later, I'd need my strength. I stepped into the foyer and closed the door behind me.

"Hey Slugger!" Emmett ran up and caught me in one of his infamous bear hugs. I hated that nickname. He'd pull it out randomly just to torment me. I'd never live down the fact that I punched Jacob in the face after our first kiss. Emmett loved to remind Jacob of that fact whenever they trained together. But, as usual, Emmett's trademark exuberance always had the ability to raise my spirits.

"Hello to you too Emmett!"

He smiled and put me down gently. "What's up with Jasper? Why did he leave like that? We were in the middle of a game."

I shook my head. "Your guess is as good as mine. He seemed a little stressed if you ask me."

Rosalie made her entrance and scowled at her rambunctious husband. "Emmett, would you stop man-handling Bella for once and leave her alone. Besides, Alice says Bella's here for girl talk. So, go back to your video games and leave us alone." Rosalie led me into the kitchen, while Emmett stomped back into the living room, mumbling under his breath.

In the kitchen, Alice was putting the finishing touches to a gourmet lunch. I sat down at the kitchen island while Alice watched me expectantly. I quickly took a bite and told her it was delicious. Alice and Rosalie took seats around the island and watched me eat. I couldn't stand their staring any longer. So I brought up Jasper's strange behavior, hoping it would be an interesting topic of conversation. I wasn't prepared for what I was about to learn.

"So, what the heck was up with Jasper?" They shared knowing looks. "Okay, seriously, what's going on? I mean, Jasper took one look at me and took off. He looked miserable. What happened?"

"Well," Alice began. "Jasper's kind of had a rough couple of months." She looked like she was choosing her words carefully. "He's been uncomfortable around you lately."

My eyes widened in surprise. "But, why would I make him uncomfortable?" Then, I panicked thinking Jasper must be having trouble keeping his bloodlust in check. He had seemed so much better lately. I had been around him several times since my eighteenth birthday and he always appeared to have complete control.

"Well," Alice hedged, while Rosalie simply watched looking bored. "How do I say this delicately? You see, lately, Jasper's noticed that you've been…well…agitated is probably the best word I can think of. I mean, you've been acting and feeling a lot like you did when you were with Edward and it's…well, it's kind of wearing on poor Jasper."

"I…I don't understand, Alice. How am I acting? I don't see why it should be affecting Jasper…"

Rosalie groaned in annoyance and said, "For Christ's sake Bella. You've been acting all horny and frustrated!"

"Rosalie!" Alice admonished.

"What? It's true," Rosalie snapped back. She turned to me, her eyes filled with kindness. "Look Bella, your hormones have been driving Jasper up the wall. And when he's miserable, we're all miserable!"

I was mortified. I wanted to bury my head in the sand and pray this day had never happened. I woke up with a hangover, had to deal with Jacob's slutty tutor, and now I was being told to my face that I was uncomfortable to be around because I wasn't getting laid. It just kept getting worse.

"Holy shit!" Emmett ran in from the living room, his video game long forgotten. "That's why Jazz left?" He looked from Rosalie to Alice for confirmation. And then he turned his focus on me as he burst into hysterical laughter. "Oh my God, you're not getting laid? Since when did Jacob start taking lessons from Edward? Oh, this is awesome. That explains so much…Jasper always whined and moped when you came over. Then he'd always jump Alice's bones the moment you left."

Rosalie jumped off her stool and ushered a hysterical Emmett out of the kitchen. "Get out of here you big lug. Go find Jasper to play with, now!"

He let Rosalie push him out, but he kept looking past her towards me where I sat in utter humiliation. "Aw, Rosie! This is too much to pass up." Then he shouted at me, "Bella, you've gotta break that boy. Sex is good for your health. It keeps your hair shiny…"

I heard a loud smack followed by a grunt from Emmett. Rosalie yelled, "If you don't leave us alone, I swear you're going to join Bella and Jacob in the no sex club!"

"Alright, alright," he complained. "I'm going. But, I want all the details later, baby." He pecked her on the cheek and ran out of the house like a blur before Rosalie had a chance to reply.

I groaned in misery. Alice hugged me, assuring me that everything would be alright, while Rosalie looked on with a smirk on her face.

"I'm sorry, Alice. I didn't realize my…sex-life was affecting you so much."

"Honey," Rosalie chimed in. "It's your lack of a sex-life that's affecting us."

"Yes, thank you." I said crossly. "I get it." I rolled my eyes at her. "Look, I don't want to feel this way anymore. Jacob and I had a little fight today. But, I think things are getting back on track"

I explained how crazy my day had been since I woke up with a hangover without Jacob. I relayed the fact that my roommate now had a crush on both Jacob and Edward and was probably enjoying some threesome fantasies as we speak. Then I told them about how I embarrassed myself in front of his skank tutor, which Jacob had found sexy as hell. "It's so confusing. He's been cold for weeks on end, and the one day I act like a crazed lunatic, he's practically drooling at my feet."

"Well," Alice smiled. "At least you know he still wants you. I mean, a few weeks ago, you weren't so sure."

"Yeah…" And then it hit me. Jacob obviously had a lot of explaining to do. But, I was sick of waiting around for him. He liked it when I showed some assertiveness? Well, he had no idea what was in store for him when he got home from work. Rosalie eyed me warily.

"Bella, it looks like the wheels are turning in your head. What are you thinking about?"

I looked from Rosalie to Alice and declared confidently, "You're going to help me get my man back!" After the initial squeals of excitement from Alice, the two women got a game plan together and set to work.

Hours later, I pulled up onto Jacob's gravel driveway and let myself into the empty house. I'd spent the last few hours getting primped and waxed while Alice bought me the sexiest lingerie she could find. I also swung by the market for some groceries, knowing that the way to my man's heart was also through his stomach. I had an overwhelming sense of confidence that I hadn't had in weeks.

I got to work in the kitchen first, preparing a large roast. I knew that Jacob would be especially hungry after what I had planned for him. After I got the food in the oven, I made my way into his bedroom to set up. Rosalie had helped me pick out some satin sheets and some freesia scented candles, which I placed throughout the room. I took my little pink bag into the bathroom and pulled out a red lacy baby-doll with matching thong. I fluffed my hair and applied some red lip gloss. The mood was set. The smell of a hearty meal wafted in from the kitchen and the flickering candle light would guide Jacob into my waiting arms.

I lay down on his bed while I waited for him. Luckily, I didn't have to wait long. Ten minutes later, Jacob came home.

"Bells?" He called out with surprise in his voice. His heavy footsteps made their way down the hall. "What's with all the candles?" He asked as he approached the bedroom. He walked in, took one look at me and said, "Holy shit!"

A/N: Well, what did you think? Why don't you press that little button at the end of the chapter and let me know. ;) Anyway, I'd like to let you all know that Coming Full Circle was nominated for best AU story at The Faithful Shippers Awards. I don't know who nominated me, but I can't tell you how much I appreciate it. I don't know if I made it to the next round or not, but check out this website:

http(colon)(backslash,backslash)thefaithfulshipperawards(dot)webs(dot)com(backslash)vote(dot)htm

Also, How To Seduce a Werewolf, by the talented leelator was also nominated for Best Fluff. Voting for the 3rd round starts on May 2nd and closes on May 12th. So, please keep this in mind and vote for us should we make it to the next round. If you haven't read leelator's story, please check out my favorites list for hers, and other great J/B stories.

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