Chapter Thirty-Four

32 BBY

~ Obi-Wan Kenobi ~
When I first woke up, the first feeling to cross me was confusion. This isn't my room. My room was not this neat, and I had a lot more stuff spread around than in this room. The bed had a lot less blankets than mine did, but for some reason I still felt warm. And I felt exhausted, but in a strangely pleasant way.

But then memories from last night flooded my mind, and I relaxed. Of course this wasn't my room. I had come to Kya's, and I hadn't left.

Automatically I reached out for the bond in my mind, but there was only a soft silence on the other end. I smiled. Kya was still sleeping, but for the first time since I had met her, her thoughts were still and her dreams not present. She had finally relaxed enough to really sleep.

I glanced down by my side, finding a sudden need to actually physically see her before I could completely relax and know that she was safe and by my side. When I did, I blinked in surprise. Kya looked so . . . so different asleep. When awake, Kya was energetic, confident, and strong-willed, and her deep eyes flickered with a thousand emotions that warned everyone that she was not to be underestimated as just some young girl who'd stumbled onto a powerful gift.

But now – now she actually seemed her age. The lines in her face were gone, now that her face was smoothed out in sleep. She was curled on her side in what I could describe as an almost childish position, one that bespoke of an uncertain self-esteem. If she was dreaming, then her dreams were pleasant, because her lips were curved in a small smile. She looked like a normal sixteen-year-old girl. Young, relaxed, innocent – and beautiful.

Then Kya shifted and her eyes opened, revealing the flickering depths of emotion. For a moment I sensed her confusion, but the instant I did I reached out to her, soothing her fears. She relaxed as she recognized my touch.

You're awake early, she commented, sitting up and bringing her knees to her chest so that she could rest her head there.

I got a good sleep . . . finally. I didn't have to worry about you anymore.

Kya blinked. Worry about me? Wasn't it the other way around?

I laughed, leaning closer to her and clasping her in my arms. Yes and no. But love and worry come hand in hand. Of course I worried about you. Teasingly, I added, Especially last night.

She leaned against me. Overprotective, she scowled, but I could sense the smile that lay underneath. I can take care of myself.

I shrugged, pulling her closer. I could feel the worry nestled in my heart, like a small wound that fails to clot and continues to drip. I knew that I would continue worrying about Kya no matter what, just like my Master had worried endlessly about Tahl.

Too bad, I told her. That's what you get for falling in love with a Jedi.

I am a Jedi.

Good; then you understand. Or are you telling me that you aren't concerned for my safety?

She shoved me gently. Fight fairly, will you?

I smiled. Not when I have you to argue with, I replied affectionately. Love always makes one biased.

Kya rolled her eyes. When did the man I love turn into a philosopher?

When he fell in love. When else?

Try 'many years later, when he's a Jedi Master and has gone through raising a hyperactive, overeager Padawan'. How about that?

I pretended to be horrified. Stars above, no! The worst fate possible, that is!

Kya started laughing when she heard my very bad imitation of Yoda. That was terrible, Obi-Wan. It's a good thing Master Yoda didn't hear that.

I know I'm bad. Must you rub it in?

And that is why I love you.

Because I'm fun to argue with or because I surrender and play along?

Kya groaned, but I sensed her amusement and smiled. I liked the innocent banter that was playing out now. My Master and I often engaged in it, but it somehow seemed far more precious and closer when I heard it from Kya.

"So, what were you and that mysterious messenger talking about last night?" I asked.

I got the reaction I'd expected. Kya stiffened immediately at my words. Her eyes darkened and I felt her draw away from our bond. What messenger? she asked cautiously.

I sighed. Kya, you can't hide things like this from me.

I can protect myself.

Now it was my turn to stiffen at her words. I can protect myself. That implied that she was in some sort of danger. I felt dark thoughts slip into my head. If anyone planned on doing Kya one jolt of hurt, they'd have some serious problems. Kya had suffered enough – no, more than enough. If she was in danger. . .

Kya had sensed the change in me. She turned. Her wariness had turned into confusion, which was the only emotion reflected in the dark blue eyes that now looked anxiously my way. "What's wrong?"

"What did the messenger tell you?" I asked sternly.

"Nothing of importance."

"Oh?"

I waited for her to relent. I could sense the emotions going through her head right now, and I knew that she would not want to outright lie to me. But she was still at a reluctance to reveal everything from her past.

After a long while, I said gently, I'm not asking you to cough up everything. I . . . I just don't thinking of what kind of thing someone could say to you that would make you so tense and worried. That just doesn't seem like you.

Kya took a deep breath. "She told me that I have to go home soon," she confessed quietly. "She said that I've already lingered here past my time; I need to finish up what I need to do before time runs out. And . . . And maybe it's a good thing that I'm going home."

I felt the breath rush out of me. Go home? And soon? No, that couldn't be. I tightened my grip on Kya unconsciously. I had finally made peace with her. I couldn't lose her so quickly!

~ Kya Ranor ~
I took a deep breath. From the protectiveness that was leaking over from the bond to me, Obi-Wan seemed ready to leap off the bed and fight the next person who so much as twitched in my direction. I doubted he would be happy with what I needed to tell him, but concealing it would only make him more paranoid.

"She told me that I have to go home soon. She said that I've already lingered here past my time; I need to finish up what I need to do before time runs out. And . . . And maybe it's a good thing that I'm going home."

I winced as Obi-Wan's grip suddenly tightened at my words. I flinched away instinctively, but just as quickly his grip got even tighter. When it got too tight and the emotions racing through his mind were too dangerous and I felt my self-defense mechanism starting to rise, I intervened sharply.

"Obi-Wan, stop! You're going to trigger my abilities!"

He released me abruptly at my words. I saw horror flash momentarily across his face as he realized what he had done – how he had hurt me. The fire in his eyes died down immediately, replaced by chagrin.

"Now do you understand? Obi-Wan, you were probably just a few steps away from the dark side just now!" I sighed. "Why can't you understand? I – No one wants to lose you to the Sith!"

Obi-Wan's eyes flashed when he heard my slip. "Is that why you kept refusing?" he asked gently. "Are you just afraid that one of us will fall to the dark side?"

"Why shouldn't I fear that?" I exclaimed, jumping off the bed to face him with my hands on my hips. Obi-Wan regarded me calmly. "All of my life I have walked the razor's edge between dark and light. If you bind yourself to me, you'll have to walk the same path!"

"What if I don't care?"

"You should. Sidious would jump for joy to have you under his control."

"No – Kya, that's not what I meant." I heard frustration in Obi-Wan's voice. "I don't care that you are dangerous, and I certainly don't care that you are fated to walk between the dark and the light because of who you are. Have you . . . Haven't you ever considered that that's part of why I love you?"

I blinked, startled. What?

A small smile flashed across his face. He slipped out of bed and took my hands. "Kya, you're so naive sometimes," he said affectionately. "I love you for your strengths as well as your weakness. As for walking the path between the light and the dark – Kya, you don't have to face it alone. There will always be people there to help you." Including me, he added softly.

I looked down. "I don't know. . . I shouldn't have been so impulsive last night."

Obi-Wan laughed. "You're always impulsive, Kya. Why do you think I always end up worrying for your safety when you charge into something recklessly?"

"All the same, maybe it's a good thing I'm going home," I said.

His eyes flashed, but the fire was momentary. He sighed wearily, dropping my hands and turning away. "You still don't understand anything."

I turned him back with a light hand. Then help me to. Why can't you just . . . let me go . . . let this go?

He pulled me closer to him. At first I fought him, startled, but then I relaxed and leaned against him. I could feel his breath against my hair as he answered.

"Because I love you."

I projected my confusion into the bond. Loving when you were a Jedi meant loving selflessly – in essence, loving but not possessing.

He answered my unspoken question. You're so strong, Kya, in ways I never could imagine – but you're also so fragile. Whenever I think of you being hurt, it's like someone's taken my heart out into my throat and is pounding on my door with a mallet. It's just so . . . so hard . . . to think of you alone, unprotected.

I don't need your protection. I got along just fine without it for my whole life, I pointed out. I was trained by the Jedi, remember?

A faint smile touched his lips. Maybe you don't need it – but I need to give it. I love you for your strengths and your weaknesses.

I pulled away to get a better look at his eyes. "If you really love me, then you can let me go," I said softly. "That's what love is, isn't it?"

He sighed again. "Yes. But letting go . . . that is easier said than done, Kya."

I cocked my head. He was right, I knew. Being a Jedi had fostered in him a protectiveness that I wouldn't trade away for everything in the universe. It was one of the reasons I loved him.

For a few minutes, we just stayed like that, treasuring each other's company, locking away each precious second spent in the company of the one we loved. I knew – we both knew – that even though we were resigned to separation, that wouldn't stop us from regretting it every single day afterward. Then I spoke again.

That reminds me, Obi-Wan – I need your help on something.

What is it?

I think it's time to show the Jedi Council my memories. It's time they learned what really happened back in my home.