Chapter 34: Hide and Seek
Alastor Moody arrived in the early morning. "Are you alright? You look pale," he asked Lily worriedly.
"I didn´t get much sleep." Lily confessed. "But I found an antidote." She smiled tiredly.
"I need your recollections of yesterday´s events," Moody was all business. "We hope we can identify some faces. Where can I put this?" He showed a stone basin.
Lily whistled. "A pensieve? I never thought I´d see one. These are rare!"
"Borrowed it from Albus."
"Come to the living room. Tea?"
"Yes, please." The auror put the pensieve on the table. "Where´s James?"
"Telling his mum about yesterday."
"Shouldn´t you be there as well?"
Lily shook her head and placed a cup before Alastor. "I look tired and pale. It would upset her."
"Does James look any better?"
"Indeed, he does."
"How come? I´d not guess he´d go to sleep while you exhaust yourself in the lab!"
"Well, he had not much choice seeing that somebody slipped a spoonful of sleeping draught into his tea."
"You poisoned your husband?"
"Not exactly poisoned. I just made sure that one of us is well rested and awake today."
"Is he aware of what you did?"
"No. He apologized for falling asleep. You won´t tell him, will you?"
Moody scowled. "No, I guess not," he finally said. He didn´t touch his tea.
"Shall we start?" Lily pointed at the stone basin.
"You know how this works?"
Lily nodded. She raised her wand to her temple, concentrated and carefully removed a delicate silvery string that was her memory of the encounter in the forest. With a diligent movement she put it into the pensieve where it swayed lazily, neither gas nor liquid.
"With your permission." The auror waited for her nod of consent before he bent over the basin to view the memory.
-x-
"Girl, that was a coldblooded thing to do! Butterflies!" Moody eyed Lily in awe.
"Coldblooded?" Lily chuckled. "Alastor, I was scared beyond my wits. I didn´t think. I just knew I had to do something. Anything."
"Well, you were lucky. Seemingly it was the right thing to do. This memory will be very useful. There are five faces in plain view which are not yet on our wanted list."
Lily shook her head. "You can´t have the memory. You can look at it here and now but you can´t have it. I need it. I mustn´t forget what it is like to face him. What he is like."
"I see. Well, my memory of your memory will have to do." Moody smiled encouragingly. "I do hope James hurries a bit. I need a memory of what he has seen, too."
"May I ask you, do you think we´re still safe here? Should we go into hiding?"
Moody sighed. "We can´t know for sure. But I think if Albus adds some protective spells to those already in place the house will be safe enough."
-x-
James´ memory brought two more faces to Moody´s attention. The auror was very content when he left.
"How did mum take the news?" Lily asked her husband when they were finally alone.
"Not too well," James sighed. "She was crying but she calmed down after a while. You look so tired, love. Why don´t you go to bed and have a nap?" He poured Lily a cup of tea.
"I can´t," Lily whispered and took a sip of tea. "I have to do something about this evil man!"
"You can´t fight him when you´re exhausted and tired. You need a rest. Come, go to bed and when you wake up I´ll have a nice meal ready for you. How does that sound?"
"Great," Lily whispered tiredly. "Can I have chocolate cake?"
"Chocolate cake?" James looked puzzled. "Well, why not."
Lily smiled. James lifted his sleeping wife and carried her upstairs. He carefully placed her on the bed and covered her with a blanket. "Well, love, you´re not the only one who knows about sleeping draught," he whispered and kissed Lily lightly on her forehead.
-x-
Lily heard soft voiced from the kitchen when she came downstairs. She smiled. Alice and Frank!
"Lily!" Alice hurried to her and hugged her tightly as soon as she entered the kitchen. She was not the only one to come and greet her with relief. Frank and Sirius were there. As was Remus.
Lily smiled at her friends. Their presence was comforting and welcome.
"James just told us!" Alice returned to the oven. "You were so brave! And lucky. Your cake will be ready in a minute."
"My cake?"
"Your chocolate cake," grinned James.
"You make Alice bake my cake? I wanted you to do it!"
"Oh come on, girl. You know I have no idea how to bake a cake. And I thought you wanted to eat it."
"We were so shocked when we heard!" Remus changed topic before Lily and James could start one of their little rows.
The others nodded in agreement. "Getting away unhurt was quite an achievement," said Frank in his calm voice. "We met him twice last year and got away alive, but only just. We were both badly hurt. I had to spend nearly a month at ´s last time."
"Dumbledore says he wanted to recruit you?" Sirius asked.
"Dumbledore? Is he here?"
"You missed him by minutes," said James. "He added some protective spells to the house. When he was finished he left with Peter, who asked me to tell you he said hello."
"What for did he take Peter with him?" Lily was puzzled. Peter certainly was the least powerful wizard of those present. What was Dumbledore up to when he took the weakest link with him?
"Wants an extra training session with him," said Sirius. "He said we were to protect you and checked on Remus and Peter´s progress in learning those defence techniques. Well, Moony passed his test easily," – the werewolf blushed with pride – "but you can´t say that for Peter. Dumbledore was furious. Said he´d be useless if he didn´t try harder. But enough of that. Is it true he tried to recruit you?"
Lily nodded. "Recruit me and use James as bait. I just don´t understand what he needs me for. He has a brilliant potions master."
"How can you call this evil creature brilliant!" James cried.
Lily shrugged. "He may be evil but still his work is brilliant. He´d be a top-ranking scientist had he not dedicated his abilities to the dark. He´s giving me quite a lot of work. And every time I think I know what he does he invents something new. Voldemort must be very content with him."
"From what we hear he´s not," said Frank. At once he had everyone´s attention. "Well," he elaborated, "we catch mostly lower ranks but from what they tell Voldemort is not satisfied with his potions expert."
"How´s that?" Lily and the others asked.
"You see, when Lily found an antidote for this poison back in January he punished his brewer severely. In fact he nearly killed him. It took some weeks for him to recover." Lily remembered the lack of new poisons in February. "But Voldemort had to see that this form of punishment would lose him his potions master. So now he´s working with threats mostly. But he punishs his brewer every time we come up with an antidote."
Lily paled. "You tell me every time I find an antidote I doom a man to be punished?"
"And you save dozens of lives."
Lily had to sit. She had enjoyed her match of intellects with the unknown potions master to some extent. Of course her main motivation to brew up antidotes had been saving lives. But no matter how lethal the poisons were, they had also been enigmatic and each had a beauty of compound only another potions master could esteem. So her opponent had to physically pay for every intellectual advantage she gained in their competition.
"You don´t pity this monster, do you?" James looked at his wife questioningly.
"How do you know he´s a monster, James? After what we just heard, how do we know that I´m not analyzing the fruits of his fear rather than malice? You saw Voldemort. You stood in his presence for a minute or two. What must it be like to stand there every day? Would any of us have the strength to tell him we won´t brew poison for him any more? I think not."
"Neither of us would have started brewing poison for him!" cried Sirius.
"Wouldn´t we?" Lily shook her head. "How can you be so sure, Sirius. If he caught you in a weak moment. When you felt unhappy and empty and hopeless?"
"You´re unbelievable." James wrapped his arms around Lily´s shoulders.
"I still don´t understand why he wants to recruit me," Lily whispered.
Alice put a piece of cake in front of the girl. "Because you make his potions master useless. His brewer is brilliant. There is no use denying it. But Voldemort can´t use his talents properly as long as you work for us. So he has to either get rid of you or recruit you. I shudder to think what you and this guy could do if you worked hand in hand."
"So this is not over?" Lily sounded frightened.
Alice shook her head. "It is not. But we´ll do our best to protect you."
-x-
As much as Lily had felt imprisoned by the need to take bodyguards with her all spring, now she longed for the freedom that had been hers then for now she was a true prisoner in her house. Whenever she needed something she was supposed to inform the order and someone would go and get it for her. She missed the little trips to the moors or forest in Remus´ and Peter´s company and she was frustrated.
The two were still assigned to collecting herbs for her but neither of them was a potions master or herbologist.
"Really, Albus!" she raged at an order meeting (which was held for her safety´s sake in her living room). "You can´t expect me to brew premium potions with inferior ingredients. I know Peter and Remus are doing their best, but they aren´t experts in this area."
Dumbledore smiled at Lily. "Calm down, dear girl. I´ll go and get your ingredients. I´m the closest to a potions expert we have not counting you."
Lily wanted to bang her head at the wall in frustration. "Albus!" she fumed to the stiffled chuckles of some order members. "I don´t want the most powerful wizard of our times to pick chives for me. I want to leave this house just for once. I´ve been locked up here for almost three months. I´m going crazy."
James tried to calm her down by patting her hand. Lily got up from her seat and started pacing the room, which was quite an achievement seeing that fifteen people including one half-giant were stuffed into it.
"I was not even allowed to Diagon Alley to get me new robes!" Lily raged on. "My husband chose these for me!"
"His taste is not bad," remarked Fabian Prewitt.
"That´s not the point," spat Lily. "I´d have liked to choose. To try on some. To...to breath for an hour or two."
"You´re right, Lily," said Dumbledore into the following silence. "It´s not fair to have you locked up all the time. I can´t rid the world of the dangers it holds for you, but if you wish, I´ll be at your service for one day tomorrow. You´re not likely to be attacked when I´m with you."
Lily was taken aback. "You´re offering to spend a day outside with me? I´ll have a pass? But Albus, you´re so busy! You have more important things to do!"
Dumbledore smiled. "You´re working hard for the order. Tomorrow nothing will be more important than you. Where will we go?"
"I may choose? Anywhere?"
"Anywhere."
"Can I make my choice tomorrow?"
"Of course."
The rest of the meeting Lily spent thinking about all the places she´d like to go.
-x-
Lily was up at the crack of dawn the next day. She ate breakfast and sat in the kitchen to wait for Dumbledore. He arrived early having anticipated the girl´s eagerness to start her day outside.
"So, where are we going?" he asked with an amused twinkling of his eyes.
"The moors. I need to breathe and to collect some herbs."
"So I´m not to pick the chives but to watch you picking them." Dumbledore chuckled.
Lily laughed. "Well, I´ll consider letting you do some picking on your own." They were walking away from the house and Lily thought she hadn´t felt that good in months.
-x-
It was great being back to the moors of her childhood. Although she hadn´t been there for years, Lily felt at home. She recognized every bush and every stone. The only sorrow were the memories of with whom she had been there in the past. However, Lily was determined not to let these ruin her day in freedom.
They hiked across the soft hills and Lily collected the herbs she needed. Dumbledore held her bags patiently and helped picking when asked to. When Lily didn´t watch he smiled at the young woman´s high spirits which reminded of a foal let out to the paddock for the first time. She seemed to cherish every detail of their day. The air which held the perfume of herbs. The colors of the moors. The songs of the birds. Even the sunshine itself.
"Tell me, Albus," Lily demanded when they had a little break. "Were you really going to go anywhere I asked you to?"
Dumbledore sipped his tea and nodded. "I promised. Though I will admit that I´ve been hoping you hadn´t in mind to go shopping in a lingerie shop."
Lily giggled. "I thought of doing that in the afternoon. – Only kidding, Albus!"
-x-
Lily´s mood got considerably worse near lunchtime.
"What is it?" asked Dumbledore.
The girl pointed at a group of bushes. "Memories. Severus and I used to put up our tent over there when we hiked the moors."
"You went on hiking tours in your holidays?"
"Whenever the atmosphere was dense at home." When Dumbledore made no remark on that, Lily continued. "My sister Petunia detests magic. She hated being in the same house with me. Things got worse when Severus moved in. So my parents agreed to let us go hiking from time to time. It gave us all a break." She smiled sadly.
"Master Snape was like a true brother to you, wasn´t he?"
"It´s not easy to be the only witch in a muggle family." Lily sighed. "He was my only friend and confidant during the holidays. The only person who really knew what I am and what this means."
"It must be very hurtful to be rebuffed by him. The whole quarrel is about James, I understand?"
Lily nodded sadly.
"There´s nothing to be done?"
"I don´t see what." For some moments the girl lingered in her memories, then she looked up and smiled. "There are some sloe-trees over there. Let´s go and pick some!"
"Sloe!" Dumbledore cried. "Indispensable for the brewing of antidotes!"
"Actually not," Lily chuckled. "But it makes a good cough syrup. You don´t want your fighters to lose on a cold, do you?"
-x-
The sloe-trees grew in a hollow. If you didn´t know where to look for them you were unlikely to find them. Lily led the way and Dumbledore – charged with bags – followed at a short distance. Lily stopped short when she got her first view of the sloes. Albus was beside her with his wand out in an instant. How did a man of his age move so quickly?
Dumbledore pocketed his wand when the trees came into view for him, too. The slim figure in black robes, who was picking sloes, was not likely to attack his charge. Insult, yes, but not attack.
"We´ll find sloes somewhere else," whispered Lily and turned on the spot.
Albus grabbed her elbow. "Don´t be silly. He´s your brother and you haven´t seen him in months. He can´t be resentful forever. But you need to talk to each other to make things up." He gently pushed the girl towards the trees.
"Albus, last time I talked to him I was crying for days!"
"Which only proves to me that you care."
Lily hesitated. She wasn´t sure she was ready to talk to Severus. But it was too late anyway. Severus had turned and spotted them.
-x-
Dumbledore led the way down the slope. "Ah, Master Snape!" he cried cheerfully. "What a pleasant surprise. Only minutes ago we´ve been talking about you!" He shook the younger wizard's hand.
"Hello, Severus," Lily said in a small voice. They shook hands, too, but the girl could tell that Severus would rather have slapped her. He looked even paler than back in January. His fingers felt not only cool but cold despite the sunny day.
"Professor, Lily," Severus greeted them with a quick nod. "I´ll be finished here in a minute. There are enough sloes left for you and I will not disturb you longer than necessary."
"I´d rather have a break before we start picking sloes," said Dumbledore. "I´m not as young as I used to be." He wiped his forehead, sighed and conjured an armchair, a sofa and a table laid for tea for three with a casual wave of his wand. He nearly collapsed into the armchair. Lily stiffled a giggle when she remembered the same person, who was now acting the decrepit man, rush to her side minutes before.
"Come join me, you two," Dumbledore panted, "don´t let an old man have his tea alone. The sloes won´t run away."
Lily sat on the sofa obediently.
"I´m not sure I have time." Severus was not to be tempted to the sofa easily.
"Lily just told me you haven´t met for almost a year!" cried Dumbledore. "And I myself haven´t met one of my best students for even longer! You can´t withhold your company from us now that we luckily met you! I´m sure whatever you´re up to, it can wait a half hour!"
Reluctantly Severus sat beside Lily. He carefully placed his bag beside the sofa.
"Collecting ingredients, Severus?" Lily asked.
"Yes."
"You didn´t tell about your job last time we met. Are you working as a potions master?"
"A friend asked me to brew him some cough syrup."
"Cough syrup! Exactly what we´re intending to make!" Dumbledore beamed.
Severus shot him a look of disbelief. The most powerful sorcerer in the country was collecting ingredients for a cough syrup every first year could brew up? "May I ask," he said thoughtfully. "How come, Lily, that Albus Dumbledore goes picking sloes with you?"
"Actually she brought me for the chives." Dumbledore interjected.
Severus was irritated. "Chives? There are no chives in the moors."
"Just an insider joke," said Lily. "I´m having a safety problem at the moment. Albus is my bodyguard."
"A safety problem?" All grudges seemed to be forgotten. Severus´ voice was full of concern and he took Lily´s hand in his. "Please tell me!"
"I met Voldemort some months ago. I escaped, but I´m no longer safe."
"What does he want with you?"
"I´m the one who makes his poisons useless. I´m in his way."
"I see. But you´re safe with Albus Dumbledore as a bodyguard."
"That´s only for today. Albus has more important things to do."
"What can be more important than your safety!"
"Lots of things. But I´m safe enough. James does his best..." Lily could have slapped herself. At the mention of James Severus withdrew his hand from hers and shrank back to his bitter, unforgiving self.
"It´s late," Severus said. "I have to go. Thank you for the tea, professor." He grabbed his bag and as soon as he disappeared behind the sloe-trees they heard the faint pop of disapparition.
"You see," Lily said. "There´s nothing to be done."
Dumbledore smiled and his eyes twinkled. "All I saw was a young man who cares for you. He just can´t overcome his pride at the moment."
"You think he´ll come around?"
"I´m sure that – sooner or later – you´ll have your brother back."
Lily got up. "Let´s get some sloes and go home." She suggested.
"Are you sure? Your day is not over."
"Nothing we´ll do can top this conversation."
Lily hummed a merry little song under her breath while she picked sloes.
-x-
"You know, Albus," Lily said when they walked away from the trees. "I´d rather not tell James we met Severus."
"Why is that?"
"Severus´ dislike is not one-sided. I don´t want to upset James. And he´d probably ruin my good mood. I mean, this conversation went better than any in years and I don´t want to spoil it with endless discussions with James."
Dumbledore smiled. "I will keep your little secret," he promised.
-x-
When they apparated near the house they were waited for by a very nervous Remus.
"Come to the house quickly!" he cried as soon as the two had materialized. "We have been attacked! They couldn´t get into the house but we don´t know whether they are still around."
"Is anybody injured?" asked Dumbledore who had his wand out in an instant.
"Mrs Potter was hit by a stunner. A healer is here. Everybody else is alright."
They ran to the house as quickly as possible and Lily rushed up to her mother in law´s bedroom. The healer was examining her and James watched, looking very pale.
"She will be OK, won´t she?" whispered Lily. "Remus said it was a stunner."
"She´s been weak recently, even a stunner could be lethal for her," James whispered back.
"I´m so sorry I wasn´t here."
James embraced Lily. "Don´t blame yourself, love," he said softly. "Your presence wouldn´t have made a difference."
"Why was she out there at all?"
"You know my mother!" snorted James. "Nothing would hold her in her bed when her son is fighting in front of the house."
"You have a point."
-x-
Fedra´s condition wasn´t as bad as they had feared. The healer gave Lily a recipe for a potion the woman was to take regularly, but she didn´t need to be taken to hospital.
Lily prepared dinner and they had a meal with their friends. Even Dumbledore stayed and chatted and laughed with the young folks. The encounter with Severus was not mentioned.
-x-
The house was attacked three more times up to Christmas. The protective spells worked well and the death eaters never got into the house but life was not easy for Lily and James.
Lily had to stay inside all the time and James left the house only to meet business partners. He tried to avoid patterns in his schedule. By Christmas both were nervous and edgy.
"You know, children," said Fedra Potter when they were having tea on Christmas day, "you should sell the house and go into hiding. Move to another house from time to time. The main reason you´re restricted to the house is that they know where to find you."
"But mum," James argued, "you´re too weak to move every some weeks. We can´t do that."
"I won´t be a burden to you much longer, Jamie" said Fedra.
"Please, don´t talk like that," whispered Lily.
Fedra cupped Lily´s cheek in her hand. "There´s no use denying it, child. We all have to move on one day. I can feel that my day is approaching fast. Please, promise you will do as I told you. Don´t let this house be your jail."
"Mum, this house has belonged to the Potter family for generations," said James.
"Nevertheless it´s only a house, Jamie."
-x-
Fedra died in January. James sold the house two weeks later and bought a smaller one using the name James Evans.
Dumbledore came to put strong protective charms on the house. Only their close friends were informed where to find the Potters.
Despite of her grief for Fedra, Lily was happy. She was free to leave her home again. She was able to breathe.