Author's Note: Surprise! A chapter! It feels like it's been forty years since I've updated, but here's a pretty good chapter (in my opinion.) From Jasper's POV! I wasn't planning on doing any other POVS than B, Jac, and Ed, but I thought it was appropriate.

Jacob will never hit Bella or the bugs. Ever. I like his character too much to turn him into a wifebeater. Please quit asking me that.

Thanks for being so understanding about my lack of updating. I didn't realize I have so many readers who are teachers! The overwhelming support has made me feel so much better.

Disclaimer: Stephenie owns it all.

Chapter Thirty-Four: "Demons" Jasper's POV

Alice and I arrived at the Blacks' house right on time. We let ourselves in to find Bella rushing to the door. Obviously she had heard our car.

"Alice!" she exclaimed, hugging my fiancee tightly. It really had been too long since we had visited, but I had felt it was best to give Bella and Jacob some breathing room. But after my phone call with Bella, I was wondering if that had been the right thing to do.

"Bella!" Alice greeted her. "Where are my niece and nephew?"

"In the living room with Ja-" Bella stopped talking as Jacob entered the kitchen. "I mean, the living room," she finished. "Jake, are they okay in there?"

He nodded. "Yep."

"I'll go get them,"Alice offered before dancing into the living room. "Bugs! Your favorite aunt is here!"

We all laughed. Bella winked at me and said, "Don't worry, Jazz. When you two have kids of your own, she'll be too fat, tired, and hormonal to skip around."

"I heard that!" Alice called, making us laugh again.

"Hey, man," I greeted Jacob, holding my hand out. "It's been too long." He has bags under his eyes. Lack of sleep.

"Much too long," he agreed, shaking my hand. "I think it's been too long for our ladies, too." He glanced toward Bella, who was already headed toward Alice.

"Yeah, you guys have been strangers," I said casually.

The women returned with Jake—I mean EJ—on Bella's hip and Abby on Alice's hip. "I have appetizers," Bella told us. "Right there on the table. We're going to feed the kids before we eat. Jazz, do you mind helping Jake man the steaks?"

"Of course not," I said. "We'll go do it right now."

"Take the appetizers with you," she suggested.

I winked at her, silently telling her I would try to talk with him. She winked back.

Jacob could use both of his arms now, so he grabbed a big plate of raw steaks and I took Bella's seasoning. There was already a large bag of charcoal and a lighter by the grill. Figuring it would be easier for me to handle the charcoal, I started to pour some into the grill.

"So how are you?" I asked him. "I haven't had a chance to catch up with you."

He shrugged. "I'm makin' it. I'm bored as hell without a job and I know it's hard on Bella. She won't start work until my leg heals."

"Is Uncle Sam still paying you?" I asked him.

"Yeah. I guess they figured it was the least they could do. You know how it is. But luckily the insurance is still good."

I nodded. "Yeah, nothing like military life."

"When is the wedding?" he asked me suddenly. Trying to change the subject.

"In four-ish months. Ask Alice. She has the countdown pinned down to the minute. Stand back," I warned him, taking the lighter.

I was surprised at how he immediately jumped back, surprisingly urgent for a guy who was hobbling on a crutch. Bad reaction to the fire. "You okay?" I asked him.

He nodded. "Yeah. Soldier's reaction, I guess."

Battlemind, was my first thought. The state of mind the military trains you in, and often doesn't go away when your tour is over...

I lit the fire, happy there wasn't a huge flame. He seemed to be calm about it. I let the fire engulf the charcoal as I turned to him. "How is life in the states? Are you adjusting well?"

He grimaced. "It's been kinda hard. But the hardest part is knowing that I'm a father now. I haven't had time to prepare for the kids, and that's been hard. Especially since they love Bella so much more than they love me." Insecurity.

"She's been with them all their life," I pointed out. "They'll get used to you, too. Do you love them?"

"Of course," he said.

"Then just keep showing them that love. Hand me those steaks, will you?"

He handed them to me, and I started to fork the steaks onto the grill. "I don't know," he said. "I guess it will all work out. I'm just...still trying to get used to life again. Do you know how cold Washington feels? And it's summer here."

I laughed. "I can imagine. What was the hottest you felt?"

"Well, we had thermometers in our equipment, and it read 120. It was miserable."

"I bet," I replied. "So what do you miss the most—the sand? Sun? Sand? Camels? Sand?"

He snorted. "That sounds like a stereotype, but it's actually true. However, I like all of that better than some of the assholes over there."

I raised an eyebrow as I flipped the steaks. "Assholes, huh?"

"Yeah. Not just the Iraqis, mind you. Most of the natives there are really quite nice and friendly. They appreciate us and what we're doing over there. It's just the extremists who don't like us. But the Americans can be assholes, too. There is nothing like working with a platoon of tired and hot men and women in the middle of the desert."

I chuckled. "So it hasn't changed since I've been over there."

He raised his eyebrows. "You were over there?"

"Yeah," I said slowly. "You don't remember that? I served a tour in Fallujah after my college ROTC stint."

"Oh, yeah, I guess I do," he said. "That was before you and Alice were together, right?" Forgetfulness.

"Yup." I paused, pursing my lips. "I met Alice when I unlisted and went to medical school. Jake, I bet I could identify with some of the shit you saw over there."

"Not saw," he muttered. "Lived through is the better phrase."

"Do you want to talk about it? Soldier to soldier?"

He hesitated. "Jasper, I don't know. I know you mean well, but I'm not sure if I'm ready to confront those demons."

Demons. He knows he is struggling.

"The Army has ordered to me to counseling," he said. "They're gonna pay for it. Since I don't live on post*, they don't know if I'm going or not. Unless the insurance people say something."

"You could be court marshaled*," I warned him. "If they know you aren't following orders, you could be dishonorably discharged. And there goes your salary and your insurance for your physical therapy...and your family."

He was silent.

"We don't even have to do appointments," I added. "We can call them appointments so your insurance pays me—I mean, I'm about to marry a shopaholic, you know-but really go get burgers or go fishing or whatever you want. You just need to let some stuff out, and make sure you're not unintentionally taking it out on Bella and the kids."

I let him think as I flipped the steaks over. Finally, he shook his head. "I'll take my chances…for now."

"Jake, you're playing with fire," I murmured.

"I'm not crazy," he insisted.

"I'm a psychiatrist," I replied. "I don't believe that anyone is crazy. It's just a matter of brain chemicals, hormones, and environment. And you've been in one hell of an environment."

"There's nothing wrong with me," he insisted. Denial.

"I'm just offering you an outlet," I said patiently. "You just need to make sure you aren't taking any frustration with the war out on Bella and the bugs."

He was silent for a minute or so. Finally, he said, "Will you go get the A1 sauce?"

I nodded and went into the house, where Bella was cooking and Alice was feeding the bugs their dinner. Bella's cooking smelled heavenly, while the kids' Gerber TV dinners smelled awful. I remembered when Edward had started them on those, claiming that they were filled with nutrients.

"Is he okay?" Bella murmured.

I glanced over at Alice meaningfully. She nodded. "I have to use the restroom," she announced promptly. "Jazz, will you make sure the bugs don't throw sweet potatoes everywhere?"

"Yeah," I said. She quickly walked down the hall. I turned to Bella, somewhat keeping an eye on EJ and Abby.

Bella eyed me. "Talk to me," she said quietly. "While he's outside."

I took a deep breath. "Well, Bells, I think it's really quite simple. He's still stuck in the soldiers' state of mind. We in the mental health industry like to call it Battlemind. His overreactions and withdrawal are all part of it. Soldiers are taught to have quick, aggressive reactions. It'll probably take a while for him to snap out of it."

"So he will snap out of it?" she asked hopefully.

I sighed. "Sometimes soldiers are able to…but those are soldiers who are feeling a little bit of guilt for killing someone. Jacob has dealt with a lot more than that. I'm guessing that the past year in his life hasn't been good. Was he tortured?"

She nodded. "He won't talk about it…but the commander in Germany told me that he was in a makeshift POW camp. His captors weren't very organized or powerful, but…" She closed her eyes, frown lines marking her face. "They left their mark on him."

"I really doubt he'll snap out of anything, then," I said gravely. "I offered to take him fishing and out for a burger so we could talk…but he won't do it. He thinks I think he is crazy."

Her eyes flew open. "Is he crazy?"

"No," I said firmly. "He isn't. He's just dealing with some…" I fished for the right word, and then remembered Jacob's way of putting it. "Demons."

"What do I do?" she whispered.

"I'm going to prod at him some more," I replied. "I'll call you tomorrow from my office and tell you what I'll suggest."

She nodded. I kissed her forehead quickly before grabbing the A1 steak sauce and returning to the grill.

"What took so long?" he asked suspiciously. Paranoia.

"Alice had to go to the bathroom, so I watched the kids while Bella cooked." Suddenly, an idea hit me. "You're a lucky guy, Jacob Black. You have such beautiful children."

He nodded. "I know."

"And so well-behaved. Bella is a great mother. And a great wife. I wish Alice could cook the goodies she's got going in there."

He nodded again. I poked at the steaks and let the bait sit.

Finally, he spoke. "Am I really taking my frustrations out on them?"

Bingo. "I don't know," I said softly. "Are you?"

"I don't know," he admitted.

"Do you want to prevent doing that?" I replied.

He nodded earnestly. "Of course. I love my family, Jazz."

"Talk to Bella about it," I suggested. "Communication is the secret to a good marriage, or so I'm told. Good thing Alice talks so much."

He chuckled. "Yeah…"

I clapped a hand on his shoulder. "I'm just a phone call away if you decide you do need some help with your demons, my friend," I told him gently. "Or if the military gets on your ass."

He nodded. "I know, Jazz. Thanks for the offer. You and your entire family—the Cullens included—have been so wonderful to Bella and the kids."

"Yeah, we pretty much love them to death," I said. "None of us would want to see any sorrow or hurt feelings in the Black family."

"I know," he whispered.

"You might want to flip those steaks," I suggested.

He took my advice. I thought our awkward conversation was over until he looked up at me, his dark eyes hard. "Can I ask you something?" he said softly.

"Of course you can. I'm your buddy."

When he finally spoke, his voice was rough. "Why is EJ named Edward Jacob?"

Dun dun dun...

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