Chapter 36: Sleep deprivation

Things seemed to be settling down once more and I was getting used to the hours and the working conditions. I was enjoying my shifts and putting away money to be able to afford a home of my own, granted it would probably be an apartment, but it would still be someplace of my own. And right now that was really what I wanted. I had yet to take the advice that I had given to Abby, or to even give that same advice to Carter to see if I could get them together rather than finding myself in my down time daydreaming of what it would be like if we were together. I had gotten home from work and climbed into bed exhausted from the night before and how busy it had gotten again. I laid my head down on the pillow and started to drift off to the land of dreams.

"Come on Anna let's go out and do something, it's a beautiful day."

I buried my head deeper into the blankets for I had been enjoying my sleep. It felt as if I had just laid down not more than five minutes ago and now here was this voice trying to, well trying to raise the dead. "Carter," I grumble almost moaning now back at him, "I'm sleeping."

"If you were sleeping then you wouldn't have answered me."

"Okay that's a technicality." I say as I sit up a little bit rubbing my eyes. "I don't come home from work and wake you up what you doing waking me up?"

"Now there will be no grumbling, it's a beautiful day and you don't have to work tonight." Carter says to me, I just fight the urge not to glare over at him. "Come on let's go out and enjoy it."

"No." I flop back against the bed again, trying to hide from the intruder in my room now. "No, I am going to go back to sleep. I need to sleep, I want to sleep, and you can't make me. Besides I don't want to throw my clock off now that I have it set to work nights."

"Nope, not taking no for an answer."

I feel the blankets being pulled away from me. "This is not college where you can come in and kick me out of bed Carter. You might be my landlord but I'm tired and I want to go back to sleep." I find myself now in a battle for the blankets, "come on Carter leave me alone. You are not my mother and I don't have to do what you tell me too." I am pulling hard on them now trying to keep them over me, "stop it." He pulls on them so more. "Don't go away."

"Come on Anna." He just doesn't want to seem to give up on this one right now.

"Go harass someone else please." I am still fighting to be able to stay in bed. He is worse than a child on Christmas morning with how insistent he is being, frustrated I may yet become.

"Come on we need to go shopping or find a hot dog vendor, go down to the lake something, shopping I know you like to go shopping."

"Stop it you big booger." I say knowing that one is rather childish but I am still sleepy and don't appreciate him coming in here and bugging me right now.

"Oh, threatening there Anna." He says as he keeps messing with me and I am really not appreciating it, in fact I am getting rather upset with him.

I growl at him now, some kind of primitive response to being harassed. "Go away Carter, right now just go away." I roll over so that my back if facing him, "you are pissing me off."

There's silence from him right now and I don't know if that means that he has finally decided to take me seriously and leave me alone or if it means that he is plotting something and I need to keep my guard up.

"Okay," that was the response that I was hoping that I would get from him. "I will just sit here and poke at you until you decide that you want to get up."

"No." I drag the no out as long as I can. "I don't want to get up and you need to just go away." The longer he harasses me the harder it is going to be to go back to sleep. I know that he knows that too but I am half tempted just to lay there and hope that he gets bored and goes away of his own free will.

"Sounds good to me, since I have nothing to do or nothing that I want to do today by myself."

I grumble and growl knowing now that I am not going to get any more sleep today. I should make him have to work some night shifts so that I can do this to him, "I need my own apartment."

"Oh, are you tired of living with me already, you have food to eat, a roof over your head and I must admit a pretty good looking roommate to share everything with."

I sit back up looking over at him, "yes you are so right I have food to eat, a roof over my head and a roommate who right now is a pain in my ass."

"I am not a pain in your ass."

I look up at him seeing the grin that is on his face, "oh what was I thinking. I worked last night, you worked during the day, and you got a good night sleep I laid down to sleep a few hours ago, in my eyes that makes you a pain in my ass."

"Yeah whatever." Carter said, "you went to sleep when you got home and that was six hours ago. You don't need more than that."

"Speak for yourself." I slap at him now. "You should try getting some more, you look like you are lagging in your beauty rest."

"You are a feisty one today." I hear him say right as I push him off the bed giving myself a small bit of pleasure.

"Ahh," I hear him call out before there is the very pleasant sound of the thump on the floor from his body finding the floor.

I laugh now, I have to, there's something about making him suffer a little for waking me up so early. "Payback's a bitch now isn't it there John." I say as I lean over the edge of the bed looking down at him.

He looks up at me with those big eyes of his pretending that I have somehow offended or hurt him. "Yeah it is. You sure can be mean when you want to. Here all I wanted to do was to take you out to lunch, show you the beautiful day and you go and push me off the bed."

"Yeah I am a mean one when I am sleep deprived." I grin down at him. I can feel feelings starting to stir ones that I thought that I had under control, that were no longer going to be an issue between the two of us but I find that I am mistaken.

I watch as he pulls himself up off the floor and then sits on the corner of the bed, "well maybe I should just leave you to your misery."

He is leaning so close to me right now that I can feel my heart beating in my throat rather than in my chest, this isn't good, this is not a good sign something has to give here and I am terrified about what is about to give. I only have so much self control and it has been tested too many times for me to keep ignoring it. I am telling myself that I need to pull back that I need to make some space between us but my body just isn't moving, "yeah," I say in a very small weak voice, "maybe you should…" I don't finish that sentence as I have found myself leaning in even closer to him rather than making more space I have made even less space between us.

"You don't mean that do you?"

"No," that is my simple response to his question.

Then it happens I can feel my lips touching his as I softly kiss him, or is he kissing me, either way it has happened. It doesn't matter right now who is kissing who just that we are. I stay that way for another few seconds as long as it takes for my brain to catch up with my body. Oh god what have I done? I just did the one thing that I promised myself I wouldn't do, that no matter what I would keep us on a friendship only level but it seems to me that I have become sidetracked by my raging hormones and I just kissed him. My mind is going a million miles an hour because I really liked that. Okay liking it was an understatement of giant proportions. I loved it.

Now what do I do? I can't take it back, I can't undo the fact that we kissed. Okay Anna, I say to myself, slow down it was just a kiss and it's not like you were shoving your tongue down his throat now where you, the answer to that is no. It was a harmless… yikes did he just… oh god… he did and my head is spinning now, I can't catch my breath at all… oh I really like that… can we keep… no we have to… can I have my mind back please.