The warning's in the title people. They've got some catching up to do.

For my cyberhoney

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36. Fuckalicious

Effy

I woke up in the most beautiful place in the world, wrapped tight against the divine body of one Ms Katherine Fitch. My brain might do some pretty stupid things to me sometimes, but it does some pretty wonderful things too, as it immediately started flashing back to last night. It was breathtaking. When I was fucking her on the piano the choir in my head were singing the music of the stars, spinning us both through space on a faster than light tour of the galaxy. I felt my body shudder involuntarily but it wasn't from the withdrawal. It was from the memory of the way she took me back. Of all the things she did to me when she had me at her mercy. I know Emily's supposed to be some kind of goddess in the sack, but seriously, it's got to run in the family, because no-one, in all the stupid amounts of people I have fucked, no-one even comes close to Katie. I thought back to my lost night and suddenly I knew. There was no way I could ever have fucked that guy. I might have gotten nearly all the way there, but something would have stopped me. Just like it did with that guy back in Liverpool. No matter how fucked I was, something would have stopped me. Cause everything I said last night was true. I did belong to her. She saved my fucking life. She is still saving my life. Not in a driving me to the hospital kind of way. But every day, by loving me, by staying with me, by making me believe that one day I'll be a real girl again.

"Mmmm, that's a nice way to wake up," she murmured, and I realised my hands had started wandering of their own accord across the body of my saviour. Her mouth found mine before she was even really conscious, and she pulled me on top of her and opened her lips to me, one hand in my hair, and the other on my ass. My response was automatic, my hips pushing down towards her as I deepened the kiss.

"Oh God, Eff, you're so fucking sexy," she moaned. "I have the sexiest girlfriend on the planet."

"Yeah you do," I replied huskily.

The progress of my kisses down her neck was stopped dead by the sound of Katie laughing.

"You sound pretty sure of yourself," she giggled.

"I do?" I asked.

"Yeah," she affirmed. "It's nice."

I don't know where it had come from. Sure I had always been able to turn the sexiness on. Bring Dark Effy out to play and watch her lay waste to the libidos of everyone around me. But it was only ever a game, another layer to the mask that stopped everyone from seeing the real me. A veneer of fake confidence with which to camouflage the self-loathing girl inside. But this feeling wasn't fake. After last night I actually felt good. Not just about me and Katie, but about myself. If we could come back to this, after all the shit we'd just been through, then we were the unstoppable force. Just like Emily and Naomi, my beautiful twin suns, mine and Katie's gravity was irresistible. And I was part of that. Something this fucking strong could not be a one-way street. We were good for each other. I was good for her. I was good.

"Oh my beautiful, Katie," I told her. "It's time for you to find out exactly how sexy your girlfriend can be."

I felt a shiver of excitement run through the body beneath me, and saw the hint of daring that flashed into her eyes.

"I think you could be right," she said seductively.

I didn't move for a moment, letting my eyes do my work for me, running them over her body and letting her know all the places I was going to touch her. I ran my forefinger over her lips, and allowed her to take it as she opened her mouth to bite it. She sucked it and licked it, before relinquishing it so I could repeat the process with my middle finger. The sight of her lips closing around me was almost too much. It was suddenly imperative that I feel their touch on mine. I was just about to lean to taste my prize when the sound of Rhianna's 'S&M' came blasting out of Katie's phone alarm.

"CuntyMcFucknugget!" she exclaimed. "Fucking work."

I knew she didn't mean it. I knew she was really enjoying working at the theatre. And being the all-new non fucking things up Effy, I decided not to fuck it up for her.

"Noooo…." She wailed mournfully as I rolled off her and lay to one side.

"Babe, you don't want to be late," I said. "And you need to get up and shower because I am fucking all over you."

I had switched my tone to pure filth for the last part of that sentence, and its effect on my fiery lover was predictable as she jumped on me and pinned my hands above my head.

"And I am all over you, honey," she growled at me.

And it was true. Katie has this thing about being covered in me. It's not the kind of thing I would ever have expected from someone so previously unwavering in her heterosexuality, but she fucking loves my juices. And God knows she generates enough of them, she makes me so fucking wet for her. Often after she's fucked me, she'll wipe her hand on herself, on her breast or across her stomach, and it drives me fucking crazy. It's an animal thing. I want to smell myself on her, and she knows that I can't resist it. But last night, fuck me, last night….I would have pulled the bed apart if I could have just to get to her. I was lying on my back tied up and fighting for breath after yet another spectacular fuck, when she kneeled up tall and made me watch her as she drew on herself like she was putting on tribal warpaint. On her breasts, across her biceps, and up her thighs. She slid back in for a refill, making me arch off the bed and swear like my mother. She pulled out again and swiped two fingers across her cheeks, before trailing her hand between her breasts and down her stomach. I was seriously yanking at my restraints by then. Damn you circus girls and your perfect fucking knots. Katie dipped her hand inside her own pussy, and began to do the same to me, slowly drawing on me, anointing me as if this were some pagan ritual and I was the fucking sacrifice. She crawled up my body and painted herself across my face. It was quite possibly the hottest thing I had ever experienced.

"Now you're mine," she informed me.

And I so fucking was.

I knew I'd closed my eyes and drifted off for a moment, cause when I opened them again, Katie was looking down at me with a very smug grin on her face.

"You were thinking about it weren't you," she whispered.

"You got any plans for the weekend?" I asked her, watching her face fall at my apparent disregard for her seductiveness.

"No, not really," she pouted. "Learn some lines maybe. Why, did you have something in mind?"

"I wondered if you'd like to spend the whole weekend fucking?" I asked her.

Katie collapsed down onto me, laughing as she smothered me with kisses.

"I would love to spend the whole weekend fucking," she smiled.

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Later that day I found myself waiting anxiously for Katie to get back from work. I had never done anything like this before, and I was honestly rather nervous. I just wanted to do something nice for her after all the shit I'd put her through, and I hoped I was going to get it right, but let's face it, it wasn't like I exactly had a frame of reference. I had started pacing the moment I'd got the text from her saying she was coming home. If I'm honest I would have thought she would stay out with her new cast longer, it being their first Friday night. And then I could have put this off till another night. But the wheels were in motion and I was just going to have to run with it. Half an hour later I heard her key turning in the lock and I lost my last chance to just abandon my plan and act like nothing was going on.

Katie ran into my arms as soon as she was through the door and started covering my face with enthusiastic kisses.

"Mmmm, it's good to be home," she said when she stopped to catch her breath.

"I thought you would have wanted to stay out longer with you new mates," I replied, wrapping my arms around her waist. I wanted her to feel able to enjoy this opportunity without always having to feel she has to run home to me.

"I missed you," she said, resuming the enthusiastic kisses. "Johnny did try to have a go at me for being a lightweight, but then Michael said 'have you seen what she gets to go home to?' and he shut right up. It's not like I was even drinking anyway, so how could I be a lightweight? I swear every fucking guy in that company is jealous of me. And Steph of course…"

I do love a Katie Fitch excited babble it has to be said.

"They should be jealous of me," I told her. "I'm the one with the superfit girlfriend."

"They should be jealous of both of us, cause we're both as fit as fuck and they can only watch and weep," she replied, kissing me again more deeply. I felt myself falling into her. A confident Katie is pretty much irresistible.

"Now then, how about we get started on those weekend plans?" she smiled, leaning in for yet another delicious meeting of lips. I closed my eyes and opened my mouth in anticipation, but the longed for contact never came.

"Oh my God, something smells good," said Katie, noticing the aromas drifting from the kitchen for the first time.

"Yeah, I sorted us some dinner," I said sheepishly.

"You are an angel," said Katie. "Cause I am fucking starving. All that acting shit is harder than it looks."

She grabbed my hand, and started pulling me towards the kitchen, stopping after a couple of steps when she noticed what I'd done to the counter. I'd only copied stuff I'd seen on TV, you know, roses and candles and shit, but the look on Katie's face seemed to indicate I'd done alright.

"Is this for me, babes?" she said, grinning at me sideways.

"Yeah," I said hesitantly.

The grin grew wider.

"Effy, are you being like…romantic?" she teased.

"Yeah," I murmured whilst affecting a shrug.

"I fucking love it," laughed Katie. "I never thought I'd see it, but I fucking love it."

"Sweet," I said, leading her over to a high seat by the counter. We didn't have a proper table, so it was the best I could do. Katie looked like a kid on a trip to the seaside, until her face fell on the bottle of wine next to the roses.

"Effy, why is there a bottle of wine in here?" she said cautiously.

"It's for you," I replied. "I don't want you living a half life for me any more. It shouldn't matter if you want to have a drink when you go out with your mates, or have a nice glass of wine with your dinner. It's not like you'd be snorting lines of coke in front of me. I love that you've been so supportive, but I can handle it."

I poured her a glass of the red, and handed it to her. She took a small hesitant sip, before immediately taking a larger, more enthusiastic one.

"Ohmygodthat'sfuckinggorgeous," she blurted. "What is it?"

"My Mum got it for me," I replied. "I told her I wanted to thank you for being so fucking amazing, and she said she wanted to thank you too. It think it's a pretty classy one."

"It's classy as fuck, babes," said Katie, taking another swig and making my bruised and battered heart beat like a champion amongst hearts. Just like you Katie, classy as fuck just like you.

I sat her down at the counter and proceeded to serve her dinner. It was only lasagne and salad, but Katie was smiling at me as if I was serving her the best food in the universe.

"You made this?" she asked incredulously, eyeing up the dish that was clearly not out of a ready meal packet. She seemed so impressed that I almost didn't 'fess up, but that would have been too disrespectful to the chef.

"Dean made it," I admitted. "I helped."

"It's still awesome, babes," laughed Katie, wolfing down another mouthful. "And fucking delicious. You two would make someone a lovely wife one day. Dean could do the cooking, and you could handle the sex."

"At least I'm good at something," I pouted.

"Trust me," scorched Katie from across the counter. "You're very good at that."

She scarfed down her dinner like she hadn't eaten for a week, and helped herself to a generous portion of seconds. This might be my first ever attempt at a romantic dinner, but for Katie it was also refreshingly functional. She looked so happy as she ate and drank and regaled me with stories from work, that I barely touched my own food I was so entranced by her.

"This is great," she said suddenly.

"What?" I asked her.

"This." She said gesturing round at all my efforts with her fork. "Getting home from work, to find a lovely romantic dinner. It's all so…. It's all so…"

I watched her consider the use of her next word.

"Normal," she said finally. "It's all so normal."

"And you like that?" I asked her.

"It doesn't suck," she replied.

I looked at how happy she was, and thought back to the pain I'd put her through with my relapse, and a sudden thought struck me.

"We could keep it like this," I offered.

"What do you mean?" asked Katie.

"I mean this is good, isn't it?" I said. "Now that I've settled on this dose. It's good. So what if we stop here, you know? I feel better. More awake. I think I could live with things like this."

"No!" said Katie, so firmly she startled me. "We haven't come this far just to give up. I know this is a lovely interlude, but I'm not fucking stopping till you're free. I don't want you to live a half life just to keep the peace with me either. I know you can do this, Effy."

Her brown eyes drilled into me from across the table offering me no compromise.

"And you know it too," she told me.

Truth was I did. I really fucking believed I could do it now, and my offer had been out of love for her rather than a belief that I would be better off staying as we were. But in the end that was a false love. She had worked so fucking hard for so long to get me well, it was an insult to think she'd want to take the easy way out. I had to see this through, because she didn't deserve anything less.

"I love you, Katie," I told her.

"Hard not to when I'm this fucking awesome," she smirked at me.

It was hard to disagree.

"Steady on," I said as I saw her clearly debating the possibility of thirds within her head. "You should leave some room for pudding."

"There's pudding?" she said, looking up at me excitedly. "What is it?"

"Do you even need to ask?" I said, letting a hint of Dark Effy creep into my eyes.

Katie countered by letting her own black angel wings start to spread.

"Does this mean I get to be the plate again?" she said seductively.

"If you want," I replied.

"Oh I want," she assured me. "I most definitely want."

We sat there, just eyeing each other lustfully for a few minutes, before Katie broke it.

"I might need a bit of digesting time before pudding activities," she smiled patting her belly. "How's about a bit of snuggling on the couch? You can ravish me with raspberries later."

"Sounds fucking fantastic," I replied.

She grabbed her wine, and I put on some different music on and we hit the sofa. I allowed myself to slip into the lazy comfort, as she wrapped herself around me as I lay on my back propped up against the cushions. We chatted idly for a while, but then I noticed Katie becoming quieter and quieter. Her breathing started to even out, and I smiled to myself as I realised she was falling asleep. I stroked her back lightly, encouraging her descent into unconsciousness. I knew she had been working hard all week and fully deserved the rest. Raspberry pavlova could wait. Tonight I had made Katie happy and that was the best fucking feeling in the world.

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I woke up with a weight on my legs and a strange tickling sensation on my belly. Somehow I had managed to get a very sleepy Katie to bed last night, but the vision I awoke to was a very different creature indeed. Her hair was up in a loose ponytail with delectable little strands falling down around her face. She was still in last night's make up, gloriously smudged to give her a sexy as fuck 'hot mess' look. She was straddling me dressed in a plunging aubergine bra and matching lacy thong. And she was writing on my belly in lipstick.

"Morning Fuckalicious," she said, when she spotted I was awake.

"Am I dead?" I asked her, unwilling to believe that such a vision could exist on an earthly plane.

"Nah, babes. You're special," she countered. "You get to play with your angel whilst you're still alive."

I tried to lift my head to she what she was writing on me, but she pushed it playfully back down.

"No peeking," she chided, and went about finishing her task. I let her. Fuck it, I would let her do anything she liked. Probably for the rest of my life. When she had finished her task, she crawled back up my body, but hovered above me so as not to smudge her design. As she glared down at me her eyes held a look that was a divinely perfect mixture of adorable cheekiness and pure unadulterated filth that I had only ever seen on one other person. I guess that was something else that the twins had in common. She leaned in for a delectable kiss, but still kept our bodies separate. The ache between my thighs drove an urge to pull her down onto me and turn the kiss into something fierce, but when I moved my hands to try, she pulled away from me shaking her head and tutting with an evil glint in her eye. She slid her way back down towards my belly and started licking her way round the words she had inscribed on me.

"Oh Jesus fucking Christ…." I moaned as the subtle trajectory of her tongue kickstarted the dopamine sprinkler system in my brain.

"Don't worry, baby," Katie assured me. "It's L'Oreal Invincible. It's kiss proof."

It felt like a bomb went off in my brain, and the chemicals threw a free for all and started rioting down my neural pathways. No drink, no drugs, no lover could possibly compare to the experiences Katie showered upon me with the tiniest of touches. She was a one woman total pleasure machine, and I totally fucking lost it long before she pushed my legs apart and thrust her tongue inside my cunt. My universe was a revolution of sound and sensation. All the deathly shadows that had haunted me for so long were now bathed in light. All my demons were happy dancing members of the tribe. I laughed as much as I screamed when Katie's tongue started dancing a beautiful ballet around my clit, her elegant choreography electrifying my nerve endings and sending frantic messages of 'what the fuck?' between my brain and body. Was there a finite point beyond which it was physically impossible for sex to become any more pleasurable? If so I had to be near to reaching it.

Apparently not. Katie slipped her fingers into me and I think I nearly flipped us both off the bed with the violence of my arch. She sucked down hard on my clit as she increased her pace, and I grabbed gratefully at the metal bars of Emily's carefully chosen headboard. I lifted my head to watch the magnificent things that Katie was doing to me, and caught sight of the first word that was scrawled on my belly. I couldn't make out the others, as Katie driving herself into me caused me to fling my head back into the pillows and release a volley of expletives. But the first one had simply read 'Effy'.

The simple fact of seeing my own name daubed on my belly in her lipstick was enough for my brain and body to collaborate in unleashing an orgasm of fucking monumental proportions upon me, and the deafening sounds of abandon in my own voice would have made me laugh had I not been too busy screaming the fucking house down. I have never been much of a screamer, but Katie didn't leave me much choice as she pushed me to the limits of my endurance. And beyond.

I felt like I was having a full on attack of dyskinesia as my body shuddered almost uncontrollably in the wake of my climax, but it was only aftershock after aftershock hitting me like a jackhammer pounding into pavement. It took me minutes to come down to even a semblance of recovery. All I could do was moan a feeble 'nooo…' when Katie pulled out of me and hopped off the bed.

"Don't move," she told me.

I don't think I could have even if I tried. She walked over to the shelf by the window and picked up my camera, before returning and standing at the foot off the bed.

"You look so fucking beautiful," she said, jumping onto the bed and firing off shots of me lying helplessly fucked beneath her. She started playing photographer, giving me instructions of where to put my hands and how to look at her, and I complied, giving myself over to her gaze behind the lens.

"Ha ha ha, this shit is cool," she laughed, when she stopped and reviewed the shots. "A little something for my private collection…"

Eventually she got bored of the game, and dropped down to lie beside me, proudly handing me the camera so I could see her favourite shot. People have been telling me my whole fucking life how beautiful I am, but the moment I looked at myself in the aftermath of Hurricane Katie was the first time I believed it. I had to let myself have a Cookie Monster of a laugh when I finally got to see what she had written on me.

'Effy For Breakfast…'

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Ok, so we didn't exactly spend the whole weekend fucking. There was a modicum of housework, we needed to change and wash the sheets after 'The Pavlova Lunch Incident.' Katie did a bit of work, and I helped her learn her lines. Admittedly, this took place whilst we were both naked in our luxurious bathtub, and there was bathtub sex soon afterwards, but still… We even managed to get some decent food eaten. Again this was a naked picnic on the crashmat just after we'd fucked each other's brains out on it, but it did provide a small interlude. On Sunday afternoon Dean came round cause his TV had bust and there was some football match he wanted to watch.

"You'll have to hang on a minute," I said as I opened the door to him. "Katie's naked."

I saw the flash run through his eyes, and raised my eyebrows at him.

"What?" he challenged me. "Seventeen. Anything in a skirt, remember?"

"She's not exactly wearing a skirt right now," I teased him as I looked back in to see her making a frantic dash for the bedroom.

"Not helping," scoffed Dean. "We don't all have superhot girlfriends we can be smug about."

I finally took pity on him and let him in the room. I took another stab at playing the good wife as Dean and Katie sat glued to the match, making tea and delivering them snacks. Dean kept yelling and cursing players and managers and moaning about tactics, but to my surprise, Katie seemed equally as knowledgeable. But whilst Dean was enthralled by the progress of the game, I suspect Katie's keen interest in the events on the screen had more to do with the footballers' themselves. Despite her new found Sapphic artistry, Katie still had a healthy appreciation of the male form. But it was the other side of her nature that rose to the fore when she came to find me in the kitchen during the post match commentary. A friendly kiss, turned into a caress, turned into a snog, which turned into a full on heavy make out session with me pushed up against the fridge.

"I wanna do some more fucking," Katie whispered in my ear, once she broke the kiss.

I looked over to see Dean watching us over the back of the sofa. His face flushed bright red when he realised I'd caught him perving.

"I'll get my coat," he said, gazing at the floor in embarrassment.

When Katie just laughed, I realised how carefree she had become about being with me. I was part of who she was now, and she had nothing to hide from anyone.

When Dean left, I dragged her back into the bedroom. We'd fucked pretty much everywhere else in the house by then, so it seemed natural to start over. She span me round and threw me on the bed and my mind jumped once again to the night she had reclaimed me.

"I want something," I said as she looked own at me. Mischief started blazing in her eyes.

"Is it what I think you want?" she teased me.

"Do you trust me?" I asked her.

I knew I was going to slowfuck her from the moment I first thought of it. I love slowfucking her, but to do it when she was tied to the bed, completely mine was feeding the devil in my soul. As I finished the final knot and sat back to admire my woman, I took leave of my consciousness and handed Dark Effy the keys. Katie stared back up at me with a mixture of arousal, and fear.

"Oh. Fuck…" she said softly.

I left her there as I went searching for what I needed, coming back with a glass of water, a paint brush, and some of the gold and silver body paint she sometimes used for gigs. I spent the next twenty minutes just painting her, teasing her with the brush as I covered her with swirling patterns and stars. Then I photographed her, my beautiful metallic angel laid out and bound before me, desperate for my touch. It was sexy as fuck and I hadn't even kissed her yet, but the way she looked at me with such love and such need was priceless. I had to savour it. Her body was already writhing against her restraints and even at a distance I could feel how much she needed me. I started to trace her patterned skin with my fingers, and then followed it with my lips, the music of Katie's fabulous foul-mouthery only tempting me to draw out her torture more. When I finally relented and kissed her, I thought she was going to suck the very breath out of me, so hungry was her response. I hovered over her, and let her take my breast, and she sucked and lapped at me as if it contained the elixir of life. She cried out when I took it away from her, but her protests were stifled as I took my mouth to her own magnificent tits. I lost myself there for a while, mesmerised by the wonder of her curves, the taste of her skin, and the incomparable texture of her soft mounds. I swear I could get lost there for days, especially when she calls my name so beautifully at each new act of stimulation.

She was unbelievably wet by the time I entered her, and I took my time to savour this as well, relishing every contour of her astonishingly gorgeous cunt. Sliding slowly in and out of her, playing her and reacting to her responses. She cried, she screamed, she moaned, and she begged, but I knew she loved this just as much as I did. I kissed my way back up her body, never breaking the rhythm of my gentle caresses inside her. I teased and tasted her breasts again, and she pushed herself up towards me, and thrust her hips against my hand, trying to draw me in deeper, trying to make me consume her. I nipped gently at her neck sliding myself in further between her legs. Her cries were guttural, their sounds emerging from deep within her animal brain. Our eyes connected, she was giving herself to me in the deepest way possible and we became one. With each other, with the stars, with all the powerful forces that forge a multitude of universes. So this is Love then. It exists, and I own it. This vital chemistry that makes us more than we could ever be alone.

Dr Fisher's research tells us that once romantic love begins in earnest, it becomes one of the most powerful drives on Earth, more powerful even than hunger. In this moment I didn't doubt it. I would cross continents for this woman. I would fight armies for Katie Fitch. She makes me something I have never been before.

Strong.

I pushed more of myself into her. I wanted to climb right inside her and fuse our bones and our blood. I wanted us to be stronger. I wanted us to be fucking invincible. Both of us were covered in sweat, and her muscles bulged against the restraints as I fucked her. She was everything. Beautifully toned strength and power mixed with exquisite pure feminine softness. She was my universe, my angel, my Katie Fucking Fitch.

I could feel her coming, I knew her body like my own. I heard the volume and ferocity of her swearing increase until she would have had estate gangs blushing and covering their ears. And then I felt her tighten around me and had to fight the urge to burst into tears. All those years of running from emotions came crashing down around my head, when everything I had needed for all that time was condensed into this moment. A tiny fist of energy that took root within my heart, making sure the strength I found this night would never leave me.

"Untie me," commanded Katie. "I need to hold you."

As I released her from her bonds, she scooted up to sitting, and pulled me into a straddle on her lap. She proceeded to squeeze me so hard I thought I was going to pass out. But I didn't complain, I was loath to diminish the intensity of our connection. Eventually Katie tangled her hands up in my hair and pulled us slightly apart.

"How was it for you?" she smiled.

"Intense," I admitted freely. "You?"

"I think we just got married," she laughed.

"Absolutely, Mrs Fitch," I said through kisses.

Once again it was Katie who pulled us apart.

"Which means we're ready for the next step," she said firmly.

"Which is?"

"We're taking your dosage down again tomorrow."

She was looking at me with absolute certainty and belief in her eyes. I felt the tiny fist of energy implanted by my angel begin shaking inside my heart, and allowed a slow satisfied smile to creep across my face.

"Bring it on," I said.

No fucking demon's gonna mess with me.