Chapter Thirty-Six
Quickly, Purple Heart smacked the gun out of Calypso's hands. "Jumping Arts!" She didn't hesitate in helping the others with her attacks, and managed to even leave a clean cut on his fingers. He held onto the bleeding digits, growling at Neptune.
"I can see why Grimm was impressed by you of all people. At first, you seem like an immature girl who lazes around and acts careless… But here, you live up to your duties at a goddess and seem to be rather impressive along with Kane's rival...
"Plus, your boobs are huge. Is that an E-cup?" She stopped, embarrassed and rather unnerved by Calypso's words... It just made Mr. Grimm furious.
Nariko ended up joining the reaper on beating the man down for his crude comments. Sir Daniel was trying his best to shoot down Zarok with arrows, but missed each time due to the wizard teleporting around. "This is pitiful Forty-darling! What I should be doing is focusing on those putting up a better fight than you." The knight pouted, his hand clenching of the sword.
Turning away and making himself levitate, Zarok examined those around him. "Don't worry William, I shall remove those fools off of you with my reversal spell! It shrinks one to their original form, and stuns their power! Perfect for a goddess that's pestering you." Upon hearing that, Zeus found himself pushing Nathan Drake.
"Hey! What are you doing?! Whoa!" Wasting no time at all, Zeus shoved himself and Drake into the blast. "Aack!… Wait, wha? Yes!" Nate looked at himself, shocked.
He was a grown man again. And Zeus was back to original size as well. "You owe me, mortal. It was only right in my nature to defend a fellow god." Sweet Tooth perked up upon seeing such, Zarok on the other hand was frustrated.
"Oh phooey, stand still, all of you! How about you then, reaper? Surely you would hate being alive and losing the ability that allows you to be one of Death. Then you could be killed off permanently along with Forty-skew… Who I'll deal with later!" Aiming once again at the group attacking Calypso, Mr. Grimm ran off as the wizard locked onto him.
Rolling right behind the child clown, Zarok fired at him. A decision he was going to deeply regret. "Oh honey! I'm hooooooome!~" Sweet Tooth felt his body grow, the jacket he was wearing rip in half, holding on his middle-aged face before covering it back up with the mask he carried around. "Perfect timing, isn't it? I can finally get my revenge on you, Calypso!"
Kratos tossed some Freeze Missiles to his rival, who caught them. "You know how to use those better than me… But it's good to have you back Kane, something I never thought I would say. Better you than Zeus I suppose." The King of the Gods flinched at his son's words.
"Awww, that's so nice coming from you cupcake!~ I'll make sure to remember it! But let's focus on the real matter at hand… Oh, and someone get the non All-Stars out of here!"
"No can do! I'm being helpful!… I just need to focus my strongest attack since I don't use AP! The others can go bugger off though!" Kuro joked while holding a card, but Lammy and Juan took it seriously and bolted.
Compa tried her best to carefully wheel the elderly man away from the scene. "Ah, now this is interesting, isn't it? At first I questioned the potential of a majority of those here, but it seems this battle is showing their true strengths... If only those kind of warriors were around before my death."
Mael was about ready to fire the Dohvat Laser Designator, but stopped from hearing that voice. "… Stahl? Jorhan Stahl?" He lowered his weapon, which he planned to fire at Zarok. Jorhan's head turned to see who was talking to him, and was equally surprised. Compa just wanted to avoid him right now.
"Wait, Radec?! Is that you?! You haven't changed a bit! That's not right! Meanwhile I'm here as a frail old man!… I have some terrible news however, that freak that they call Gigadis… You're going to wish to murder him like I want to right now. He-"
Not wanting this to drag on, Compa nutshell'd it. "Gigadis and his friends destroyed pretty much every living thing on Helghan and planets around it. Reunite later, we gotta go hide because I don't care what the background of your two weirdos is!" Stunned by her rude claims, Stahl was pushed away without objections.
Rather than going after them, Mael stood there. "Radec? Did something happen?" Sir Daniel tried to grab his attention, but was shoved harshly. Not responding at all.
"I need a moment. Handle those freaks on your own while I gather my anger… And that evil sorcerer is aiming for you."
Sir Daniel turned, seeing the same energy that was used on those attacking Calypso. "This is your end, Forty-skew! I'll revive you, then kill you, then maybe revive you again as a soldier for my own army." Knowing how it 'worked' before, Fortesque didn't take Zarok seriously as he lifted the miniature Jak to take the blast for him.
The impact allowed Jak to return to his normal form. "Alright! There's my ol' pal back in action! Thank goodness Dan knew that wouldn't kill you, huh Jak? Now let's show these guys what we're worth!" Daxter shouted, handing him the rifle.
"Nice job Zarok… You returned that clown to his normal size along with others, now he's out for my blood! Why did Gigadis even bother with you!?" Calypso began hiding behind the wizard. Covered in cuts from Kratos, Purple Heart, and the others.
"Do not pin this on me! You came in here with only that stupid gun which the goddess flicked out of your hands! And it isn't my fault everyone is acting like a shield for each other!"
"How about you transform into a serpent or something? If you can even do that right!"
"You dare question my abilities?!"
"Maybe I should start playing that theme song again, because I bet it would do more than your stupid magic!"
"Don't you dare play that dreadful song!" Everyone nearly stopped attacking the two, watching them bicker instead.
"Well fine! If I can't do that, I'm going back to being surrounded by women! Call me back when Gigadis returns and uses his true form on these freaks!"
"Wait, what 'true form'? No! Don't leave me here!" Zarok cried out, but Calypso snapped his fingers and vanished. "Why that no good…! Fine! I shall scale up and rid of all of you! Maybe even keep you for a snack." He spun around for a moment, red smoke covering his body.
… Only to transform into a chicken. "Whoops! Give me a moment darlings! How about… Thisssssssss?!" Changing and growing to the point where he couldn't fit in the halls, a giant snake stood before the All-Stars.
Finally, Radec snapped out of his trance when something caught his eye. "You… What are you doing here?!" Pupuru flinched, seeing the colonel approach her. "Even if Spike got that fool down for the count, no one can risk Gigadis returning! Why did you even come to these ruins when you could screw us over?!"
She was about to tell the truth, but then remembered.
"They're gonna question you along with the others, and if you try to say anything about Evil Cole, don't do it."
With a lump in her throat, she swallowed her gut and made an excuse quickly. "T… To find you?" Not believing her, Radec went back to firing the Dohvat Laser Designation on the serpent. "Because, uh… I lost my memory when I woke up, wondered why my clothes were gone!" He stopped for a moment, shoving her behind one of the doors to keep Pupul out of sight.
Once the laser was out of ammo and he was unable to get a proper shot on Zarok, Mael began to hide himself with Pupul. "Uhh, Radec? Wait! What's she doing-" Isaac Clarke asked, but got a fast response.
"I'll hide the worm! You continue helping Daniel and the others!" Pupuru held onto Kuu, who was growling even more as Mael slammed the door behind him. "Now then… What gave you the right idea to follow me then? You're making this worse than it needs to be!" The small animal hissed at Radec.
Pupul sat down, thinking for a moment. "No one left a note about where my clothes went, so I used my alternate outfit and came down here. The others followed me." She lied, making Kuu even more confused about what was going on.
… Then she was no longer able to hide the truth. "I found a hickey on my shoulder. I know what you did! You can say it was for the sake of myself and others, but…" Once again, Pupuru shuddered.
He tried his best to hold a straight face under the gas-mask. "So you remember what I did to you? What about my words during then?" She shook her head slowly. "You were so absorbed in the moment that the only thing you heard was white-noise? Either way, I'll repeat it: 'Some unusual part of me has been attracted to you the entire time, especially the side of you that wishes to be stomp me into the ground.
"'I couldn't help but love seeing you hot and bothered. A leader like myself where power always crawls to, and a young and puny magic-user like you…' Taboo, isn't it? Not like me to say that at all. But what are you going to do now?" Blocking the door with himself, Radec leaned against it.
All Pupuru could do was drop Kuu for a few minutes…
"I feel awful Juan… I'm useless! I can't go out there and fight, I left my guitar behind in Uni's ship like an idiot! President Qwark said I'm brave and can do almost anything but… I'm nothing without my guitar!" The luchador looked at the sheep girl, also not too thrilled about what was going on.
He could go out there and fight, but he partially lost his moxie or will to do such. "There has got to be another way… Huh?" Lammy's eyes were on the staff that was on the ground. "What is… Wait! Th-this is that wizard's staff! When I first saw him eyeing the tournament! Oh gosh, he went here and something terrible must have happened!" She began turning even more frantic.
Juan wasn't sure how to react to this, for the most part he didn't really care, but he did have an idea. "Senorita?" Lammy jumped, never hearing the luchador speak before this. "It's in the guitar, isn't it?. And as long as the guitar is in your mind, I'm positive that you can do anything."
The words of Chop-Chop Master Onion were coming back to Lammy as well, she began smiling. "Yeah, that's right! The guitar is in my mind!" Becoming bold and gaining power, she kicked the door open to everyone's surprise. "Leave it to Lammy!" Juan Aguacate watched the girl step out and prepare herself to help.
Now all Juan had to do was figure out how he should help. "Hey you! Snake thing!" Zarok was attempting to crush Kratos under his teeth while dodging the attacks of everyone else. But now his attention was grabbed. "Can someone give me a beat to work with here?"
While Spike was left utterly confused, PaRappa quickly pulled out Boxy. "What even is thissss? Another poorly conducted sssong? Those Panty Sssstocking ssssoundtracks were painful as it is!" Zarok didn't even realize that his words were in-sync with the boombox. Repeating the beat that followed the wizard's sentences, Lammy began shooting magic energy at him with each strum.
Zarok only saw now that it wasn't a guitar in her hands. "I don't need another nuissssance that dissstracts me!" It was traced once more by Lammy, who shot at him. "Continue these acts, and I'll make sure… That your life will be the ssssame as the original owner of that!"
"This is really stupid…" Doctor Nefarious said under his breath. "Why not you all do something productive? Because this nonsense won't get us anywhere! We're here to fight Gigadis, and not have a Guitar Hero fest! So why even bother with a squishy like you?" Lammy ended up following his words as well to use on Zarok.
Losing his temper even more, Zarok tossed Kratos out of his maw. "That's enough!" He transformed back to his original shape. "I can't handle that racket even when I'm scaled up- STOP CONTINUING TO COPY MY SENTENCES WITH IT!" He was hit once mroe with dark magic.
"Heheh! This was only a distraction anyway… Now Juan!" Zarok flinched, seeing the luchador run into the sorcerer. Grabbing, then throwing him to the ground, and crushing the evil wizard with his large build. Juan could hear a snapping sound from his opponent's back.
Calypso returned with rocket launchers and more guns. "Like I said, that old fool can't handle himself!" Juan got up, tempted to tackle Calypso along with the All-Stars. "Now, now. Think about this for a moment! I could blow you up right here after all-" Kuro finally let out a loud mew.
"Yes! I got it! I finally got it! I can do this now!" Holding a card in his paw, Toro was puzzled by his friend. "Abandoned Line… 'Aimless Journey to Abandoned Station'!"
Both Calypso and the crushed Zarok looked at each other. "Abandoned Station?"
Right as they said that, a portal opened up...
And a bullet-train came right out, running them over. Kuro and Toro gave a high-five, jumping around as Kat hugged them. "Hah! And people think my rockets are ridiculous!" Heihachi cackled. "Either way, that's three down for the count!"
"Only snapping Dart out of his trance is left." Kratos said, seeing that his fight with Evil Cole continued.
((Abandoned Line:'Aimless Journey to Abandoned Station' is a reference to Touhou 10.5: Scarlet Weather Rhapsody, and Yukari Yakumo's strongest attack. Which is weird, because Touhou Project is a Windows game, putting it more around Microsoft…
So the only reason Kuro(one of the SONY cats) uses it is the fact he likes girls, so he would like the Touhou series… Which is 98% female cast.
Oh! Also ,I have slight good news… There's going to be a psuedo-sequel to this story as well! It's going to be a Nintendo/Sony/Microsoft crossover… As in, Smash Bros/PSASBR plus the Xbox Beat-Down we're never going to get. What's going to happen? Maybe I'll write a prologue~))