Chapter Thirty-Six- Why?
Rolling over the world on a mottled cloud of sticky black and brilliant gold, Pitch Black now James Black, was wondering if he could handle the mess he had gotten himself into. He couldn't stop replaying it, his memories were fraught with the living nightmare that had brought him to seek help in the form of that demented darkness in the first place. Mani watched on in silence, trusting his children to work things out on their own.
He looked up at the sky for a moment, until the clouds covered the sky and he was left in an even darker world, one more closely resembling what his soul had looked like mere days ago.
Why did you let me do it? Why wasn't I strong enough? I thought I was your guardian, what happened? Were you…wrong about me? He plead silently. When nothing happened, not that he had expected an answer anyway, he sat heavily and let his legs dangle over the edge of the cloud. He watched the golden sand travel through the village for a moment until it disappeared. He knew what he needed to do now, he just couldn't make himself stand, move to the town.
There's a teen in the middle of the next street on the second floor that fell asleep waiting on her friends, she needs a dream to warn her against sneaking out. There's a little boy too afraid of bees to come near the flowers in the summer and he needs help with that. A set of siblings is afraid to learn to swim, a mother is afraid of losing her baby so she refuses to try. A child is afraid to tell his parents about his boyfriend. A girl is dreading being asked to a dance…or not I guess. They all need this, but…they're stronger than this. They don't need me. Do they? He was trying to reason it out, but it always ended up there.
The sky beside him lightened, his peripheral vision shining with a familiar light.
He jumped about a foot in the air.
"Sandy!" He had landed backward, clutching his chest like a frightened horror-movie blonde. Sandy died laughing, He couldn't help how funny it was. That British accent squeaking like a child was funny, friend or foe. "Sorry…instinct." He chuckled, righting himself. "Easy, it wasn't that funny." He crossed his arms, waiting. Sandy sobered quickly.
Symbols flashed and with Sandy's magic coursing through him, it was easy to interpret.
"Is something wrong? You were just sitting there…?" Sandy's concern was etched all over his little golden face and it was as heartwarming as it was baffling. James stuttered for a second before formulating words.
"Oh, no I was just waiting for a few to knock out, you know how older people get." He deflected. Sandy looked shocked.
"Older people? Your magic doesn't deal with children?" Sandy asked, jaw dropped.
"Not always, no. Sometimes its teens, adults, even into the geriatric ages. I protect everyone, not just kids." He offered sweetly, if not a bit wearily.
I wonder how much grief people gave him for that before. Sandy pondered as the two fell into comfortably uncomfortable silence. "Alright, that makes sense, but what's really up here?" Sandy asked knowingly.
"I-" Sandy was giving him a look that told him he wasn't fooling him. It was a semi-stern, arms-crossed, foot-tapping, eyebrow-up kind of look and James was no match for it. James just sighed. "I just don't see a point. I've seen these people handle these things on their own, time and time again. I just don't understand why I need to do it." He admitted. Sandy perched himself beside the much taller man, trying to decide what was happening. He sounded like Jack, so much so that it was almost uncanny. There was no way this was a spirit older than him. It sounded like a crisis many spirits went through in…Sandy's eyes widened.
"James, when you were Pitch, I don't know how to ask this other than…do you really remember what happened? Do you really feel like time passed?" He asked, mentally crossing his fingers that it wouldn't be taken wrong.
"I-of…of course…" He trailed off. "You know, I really don't feel like I've been around that long." He admitted. "You know, when I think about it, I never even had a chance to figure this magic out before…"
"James, trust me okay? You have a purpose, something I could never do, and we can help you figure it out. One day at a time?" Sandy offered.
"I know you're right, it just doesn't feel like it." He admitted. Sandy nodded, he understood that one too well. He nudged his partner-in-crime in the making playfully. If there was one thing Jack had taught him, it was how to make a bad time better. He zipped away and when James looked up he was nailed with a dream snowball.
Laughter filled the air and soon there was nothing left of that doubt plaguing him. He even felt energized enough to fake-snow-fight and do his job at once!
"Well, I'd better get moving, the night moves fast." James excused himself when he was done. Sandy waved him off happily and hopped in his favorite sand-plane. Maybe he'll be okay now. I hope so.
Back at the warren Bunny had been trying to calm a worried Jessica. She wasn't taking the transformation as well on retrospect and sleep.
"What am I? Why am I like this?" She fretted, wings trying to pick her up again. She had been seemingly fine for a moment, standing in awe of the bright colors and the magic of the moment, but when the transformation's true weight hit her it had hit hard. She had fallen over, floating up on her wings instead of hitting the floor.
He could see her starting to panic, the shock of what had happened overwhelming her. He sat beside her where he would be closer to her height and tried to steady her. She was fluttering, unable to touch down.
"Easy there, hey look. Look right here, Jessie come on, look here." He urged gently. When her eyes met his they were practically vibrating with the fear of what was happening to her. "There ya are. Close your eyes for me, sheila?" He asked.
"Why?" She asked nervously.
"Just trust me?" He asked. She didn't even hesitate with her nod.
"Okay." Her eyes shut tightly and she was holding her breath.
"No, not like that." He chuckled lightly. "Relax, okay? Now, just take a deep breath, don't think about anything specific, just breathe." He coached. "Now, feel the muscles in your shoulders, gently let them relax, slowly, and fold your legs up under you when you do."
She touched down slowly, still shaking, and opened her eyes in shock.
"There ya go. Now, there's a way to keep ya on the ground now, and you need to talk this out so…" He slowly, carefully, wrapped his arm around her shoulders just above where her wings connected. One gentle push downward and he had smoothed down her wings and feathers under his arm and he held them there gently. She shivered once, the sensation of feathers all over, and especially being petted, strange to her.
They sat for a second and Jessica wasn't getting any less tense. Bunny finally broke the silence when he couldn't take it anymore.
"Wanna tell me what it is about this that bothers you so much?" He asked, stooping down low to meet her eye.
"I just…there's been so much to…to process." She managed to choke out, sounding very much like she was going to burst into tears at any moment.
"Yeah, Mani likes to do that to people, but I don't think you mean just recently, do ya?" He asked quietly.
"No…I just…from almost being evicted to being a spirit and now I'm not even the same species. I don't know what I'm…supposed to do…it just…nothing makes any sense anymore and…and I just don't know what to make of this." She admitted. "What do I do? There's no easy answer and none of this feels right. There's nowhere I can go, nowhere Jamie can go, we just…nothing feels like home and now I've got to let him run around a much more violent world with Jack. Not that I don't trust him, it's the rest of the spirits I'm worried about and I can't help him, hell I can't even really help myself and now I'm covered in feathers and I doubt clothing is going to feel nice, and-" She hiccupped, having started rambling on one breath.
"Alright, easy." He tried calmly, "I know it's a lot to deal with, but we can deal with it together. You have us, all of us, and I know Tooth can help. She wasn't always a fairy either, she was human like you. She can help you with the transition." He assured.
"You…you're right…I'm being irrational." She shook her head and tried to breathe normally. Something about the way she had said it, so laden with self-loathing, hit a sore spot in Bunny's heart.
"Now I didn't say that, sheila. You're bein' pretty darn reasonable here. You've been through a lot, you and Jamie both. This isn't supposed to be something you can get over in a few hours. You've got a lot of stuff to work out and frankly I think ya need a hug." Bunny almost cooed he was being so quiet. Jessica just looked up at him in awe, face still pink and still shaking a bit, but so much calmer.
"That…I wouldn't've…" She couldn't put it together. She let Bunny pull her into a hug, chuckling a bit at how stunned she was. She actually found that soothing, as evidenced by her melting into the Pooka's warm fur.
"There ya go, we'll figure this out, don't worry." He reminded her, lest she forget.
"I…thanks…" She muttered, not really knowing what to say.
"Well of course, everyone needs a little help containing themselves now and then. It's a weird world out there and you aren't use to it yet, but you'll get the hang of it."
"I can only imagine Jamie trying to-"
"Hey, Jamie's gonna be fine, he hadn't grown out of being involved in this world yet, and he's seen it all by now. There are variations, but they won't be much of a shock to the little buggar. Don't worry, he'll be okay." He cut her off gently, reminding her that her little boy was still little, and still able to adjust easily. She sat there quietly for a second, not sure how to proceed. She had worn herself out, not use to the energy it took to power her new quick-moving wings, and quite frankly the rest of her as well.
Bunny didn't goad her, or try to ask her things, they just sat there. He felt her relax and quietly let out a breath he didn't even know he had been holding. She yawned and shook her head.
"I guess I should-" She cut herself off with a yawn. Bunny couldn't help his chuckle.
"How about you take another nap, and then we'll sort this out. You might be surprised, it could end up kinda fun." Bunny teased. She looked like she was going to argue for a second but just sighed.
"Sure, who knew these things would take so much energy?" She asked, letting them flutter back out. With a little focus she was able to keep them still and move them a little, seeing how they shone in the light of the warren. "Wow…I guess they are sort of pretty." She admitted.
"Yeah they are, sheila. They're gorgeous." Bunny agreed without really thinking. Jessica just chuckled.
"Maybe I'll get use to it faster than I thought." She tried. Bunny just shook his head.
"I know you will. Come on, nut." He helped her back up and led the mostly asleep, now fairy, into the guest room he had designated for her. She was asleep in seconds and Bunny had to smile. She would be fine. He went back out to the fields to ponder on what had just happened until she woke back up.
Hey all! Sorry for the wait, but I'm still working on this I promise. A reviewer gave me an idea, and believe me I hadn't intended it to happen like this, but this thing really does have a life of its own. Let me know what you think, any review is a good one! Y'all are amazing people!