Chapter Thirty Six

Bella

I could hardly hear his words for the beating of my own heart in my ears. I saw him rub his chest as he spoke about pain and I knew Garrett had been correct, Jasper was suffering in the same way that I was. I knew all about that kind of pain and it told me all I needed to know. I swallowed and took a deep breath before speaking, this would be either the beginning of my life or the end of it, but either way I had no choice, I didn't want a choice.

"Jasper, I know how you feel because I feel it too so I guess maybe I was wrong before. It scares me that I want you so much but I can't fight it any longer. I came here because I ended up in hospital with the pain"

He moved forward, arms open, then hesitated and it was up to me what happened next. I stepped into his embrace and he closed it around me, pulling me close and laying his cheek on the top of my head.

"Bella. I've dreamed of doing this for so long."

I couldn't reply because my whole being was suddenly flooded with warmth and peace. I felt like I'd come home so it couldn't be wrong.

Jasper

As she stepped into my embrace I pulled her close and it was even better than I'd imagined to have her this close. I lay my face on her head and breathed in, her scent chasing away the last vestiges of pain from my chest. I closed my eyes and felt a warmth I'd never experienced since becoming a vampire. It was as if my very tissues were suffused with the warmth of her love for me, it swept over in waves with just a hint of worry. I knew she still thought of what had happened with Edward but time alone would prove I wasn't him and my love would never allow me to hurt her in any way. Then a thought suddenly hit me, Alice had known I was going to feel this way with Bella and she'd deliberately tried to stop us meeting and falling in love. My anger at Alice's callousness must have communicated itself to Bella because she tensed. I moved one hand to stroke her cheek,

"Its OK Bella. I was just thinking about all the pain Alice has caused us through her jealousy. She tried to keep us apart"

Bella murmured my name and nestled closer as if trying to melt inside me.

After a while she pulled back to look up at my face, hers flushed as if she'd run to catch me.

"So Jasper what now?"

"We start over. You stay with me and we figure out where we go from here darlin'"

She smiled at my words and moved to sit on my lap, winding her arms around my neck and kissing my cheek tenderly. I leaned back taking her with me and closed my eyes again. I could stay like this for eternity and be happy but my Bella was human and before long she pulled out of my embrace reluctantly

"This human needs a few minutes but don't you go anywhere. Except maybe the kitchen. I need feeding"

As she raced up the stairs she caught her foot and almost fell but I was there to steady her. She grinned,

"Looks like you've got the job now."

"Sorry?"

"My new Guardian Angel"

"New one?"

"Oh you didn't know?"

"Know what?"

She grimaced,

"Garrett has been keeping an eye on me. Keeping me safe for you I think"

I would be having words with him next time he appeared but I just smiled at her and she went on up the stairs while I watched.

Bella

I brushed my teeth quickly and then decided the hell with it and took a quick shower, anything to quieten my nerves and stop my heart beating out of my chest. He didn't need to say anything, I knew what Jasper and I had was nothing like the feelings I'd had for Edward, these were deep and passionate and so sweet. I hurriedly threw some fresh clothes on and ran back down stairs managing not to trip this time, just. As I walked into the kitchen a wonderful smell enveloped me and my mouth started watering.

"God you can cook too?"

He smiled, the first full smile I'd seen on his face and my heart stuttered before picking up again.

"Hmm, if you're going to make a habit of that can you give me some advance warning"

I managed through a tight throat.

"What?"

"That smile. It's dangerous to my health"

He came over and took my hand leading me to the table which was laid up and pulled out the chair. I sat down and he brought over a plate of scrambled eggs with wild mushrooms and a glass of orange juice. The eggs and juice I could account for, but the mushrooms? Seeing my frown he did that hearty stopping smile again,

"I picked them while you were busy. I hope its cooked to your liking. Its been a very long time since I tried my hand at cooking food."

I wondered just how long but my mouth was too full to allow the question out. When I finished everything he took my hands and pulled me up to hold me close again.

"What would you like to do today?"

"I have a choice?"

"Of course. We can go for a walk, a ride, or just hang around and talk."

"I think I'd like to go for a ride, we can talk at the same time."

He smiled but it was a little different, a private joke I didn't get.

"I'll just go up and change."

"You're fine"

He swung me around and led me out of the house towards the barn, so a ride in the pick up then. But no, he went round the back of the truck to a stable which contained the biggest horse I had ever seen. Its shoulder was taller than my head,

"Ah, can I change my mind?"

He shook his head,

"You'll be fine. The Major hasn't thrown anyone yet."

"The Major?"

"A private joke between Peter and I"

"OK."

I was very nervous as he lifted me onto a bale of straw and proceeded to saddle the monster horse.

"Stallion Bella, not horse"

I wasn't going to get into the difference, I didn't want to upset The Major before I had to ride him.

When the horse...stallion was ready Jasper picked me up and swung into the saddle with me and I heaved a sigh of relief.

"You thought I was expecting you to ride him alone?"

I nodded somewhat sheepishly and he laughed before kicking his heels against the horses sides. It set off slowly at first and apart from the fact I was sitting too far from the ground on a moving animal who was way taller than me the ride was rather nice. After all I was sitting against Jasper, the feel of his cold skin against my warm back and his arms were around me holding the reins. It was a disappointment when he stopped and we dismounted but then I saw where we were. A small creek was bubbling through a clearing and the sun was shining warmly, it was heaven and I was here with my very own angel.