Disclaimer: I just got whatever I make myself, y'all. Totally. Like… like brownies or something.

BAMS: Anytime buddy, I'm just glad you liked the chapter.

Razor T McCutchn: A vegetable, huh? So I really can call you a couch potato? (See 'cause it's a vegetable… and you said… yeah…) Anyway, I'm sure a lot of people are wondering the same things you are, as I am. I suppose we'll just have to wait, right?

Kachie Takahashi: I'm also happy to see they didn't get hurt too much again even though they are very reckless. I do agree with you on the Corruption thing you got going; it and Raegas (seeing as how she didn't react when Nazara called her the Corruptor) could have something to do with the Reapers. Still, we can't know for sure until it's explained…

Liege Lord: I figure Raegas is waiting to throw Nazara off-balance until she's sure it'll make a real difference. For example, she could distract him with the name during the attack on the Citadel and all, you know? Either way, we'll just have to hope everything will turn out well. And thank you, Shepard did well in practically saving everyone from Raegas' Corrupted Bloodrage, eh?

Hopelessly Blue: I didn't mean to make the hover-thingy sound so funny… -_- Oh, but I also hope Ayl and Ash are compatible. Still, he might hold off if he somehow finds out about what happens with her in the second game. Not that he will, I'm just sayin'… And yes, that whole Reaper thing is highly suspect. I can only hope I surprise you with whatever happens later; I don't like it when people know what's coming, I feel like it takes the emotion out of the writing. Anyway, thanks HB, I hope to see you again as well. ;)

A/N: 'Kay, let's get this going so we can see what happens next!

Luckily, we made it with seconds to spare. Once that was over with, we had to take care of everything. We had to get out of our armor, go to the med-bay for treatment or check-ups, have a debriefing with the team and the salarians, fix damaged equipment, make plans, contact the Council, decide what to do about morale and do a headcount for multiple reasons. All in all, we were busy the rest of the day and it wasn't until eleven at night that we finally finished.

And at that time, a crew member came up to me looking afraid, but approached still. He had seen my little episode, along with everyone else, back with Saren. Unfortunately, that whole incident of Virmire allowed the crew more reasons to either hate me or be afraid of me. With some, it was both.

"Ms. Raegas? I was told to, ah… to give this… to you…" he stuttered, handing me a datapad. I took it and scrolled through the data, scanning the information contained in it. Great. Ashley damaged her suit enough so I'd have to fix the damn thing. I glanced up to see the kid was still standing there, shifting uncomfortably.

"Thank you, Johnson." I said, walking away, ignoring his dumbfounded expression. I had no doubt he didn't know I knew his name, but when you're more observant than most people, you find things out. Especially when some people spoke louder than they needed to.

I made my way down to the fourth deck, Ciria at my side as usual. After a long elevator ride, I made it down and trudged to the CC, sighing. I walked through the doors, staring at the ground and took a step forward. Before I could continue though, arms surrounded me in a tight embrace, startling me. I blinked several times, unable to think of what I was supposed to do. After a moment, the person drew back, showing me it was Ashley.

"Did I give you a million credits and forget?" I managed, getting her to blow out a laugh as she patted my shoulder. I didn't think I was emotionally strong enough at the moment to take the happiness or, rather, relief from Ashley.

"No, but… you saved me and the others back there… on Virmire." She said, sobering up. I lowered my brows and frowned slightly.

"It was Ayl and Jasin, not me. I'm the one who failed at helping or taking Saren, if anything." I responded, going to my table. Ash's armor was lying there in a dented, burned pile. She must've taken a beating. A moment later, I felt her hand at my shoulder and squeeze slightly. I was surprised that I didn't care about her touching me.

"It wasn't your fault, Raegas. None of us could've stopped that crazy bastard." She said. I sighed and chose not to put my slight issue on her and turned to face her.

"So, what was that hug for? I doubt it was because you actually like me." I said, crossing my arms and leaning against the table. She seemed to take on a guilty expression at that.

"Yeah, I've been an ass." She said, looking down.

"I don't blame you; I hate myself too." I said, cocking my head to the side. She looked back at me for a few shocked moments before regaining herself.

"After you saved my life- again- I realized I have more to live for than just my family. I'm not afraid of dying for the Alliance, but when it comes to leaving comrades behind, I… Anyway, I wanted to tell you in person that I… well, uh…" she said. Why did people lose their nerve to talk to me whenever it came to something personal?

"You and Ayldrik look good together." I saw her shocked face, but I continued. "He really likes you, you know." I said, not bothering to hide the small smirk on my face.

"I really like him as well, as odd as it is, considering…" she paused for a moment, and then chuckled to herself. "I think I've even fallen for the dork." She smiled to herself, perhaps thinking of something funny that happened before. Then, she looked back to me, pensive once more.
"He told me you were the head of your family, so…" so she understands… at least a little bit. I was shocked that my siblings still accepted me as the head of the family, but even more so that Ashley respected it enough to speak to me in person. The thought brought a small smile to my face.

"I don't know whether it's important to you or not, but… you have my blessing. Care for each other always." I said, earning a bright smile from the Chief. I had to keep myself from thinking of what happens at Horizon in the second game. I could only hope to somehow change that small issue later.

"You're pretty cool after all." She chuckled teasingly, punching me in the arm. The gesture confused me a bit, but before I could answer, she left.

"Okay…?" I muttered. I looked down at Ciria for a moment and shared a look with her.

As I thought of everything that had happened that day, I turned to my table and began working on the armor.

…

I had hoped fixing Ash's armor would get my mind off of things, but it appeared that wasn't the case. It was all I could think about, my uselessness replaying in my mind, over and over again. By the time I was finished with the armor, I found myself wondering if Shepard was alright. I was actually worried about her, what with everyone bearing down on her and the almost death of Ash or Kaiden.

"Damn…" I muttered, screwing my dry eyes shut, trying to get the dryness out. As they watered, I placed my hands on the table and leaned on them, hunching over. I wasn't supposed to be her friend, but look how it worked out; I really cared for Shepard. That was terrible; I'd try to save her from the destruction of the first Normandy! That was supposed to happen though! I couldn't just…
"Why me…?" I whispered in question, to no one in particular.

I shook myself and decided to at least check up on Shepard and see how she was doing. If she was feeling fine, she'd have come to me instead. Great. Now I was a pushover when it came to her. Wonder what comes next.

Cursing myself, I rode up in the elevator to the second deck, wondering where she was in the first place. With a sigh, I made my way to the mess. I hadn't eaten since before Virmire, so it was only fair that I got some food since it was over. Besides, I needed a few minutes to get my thoughts together and stop this headache from getting worse.

Ciria whined quietly suddenly, grabbing my attention. I looked up and saw Shepard staring at a plate of food, more spaced out than I'd ever seen her.

So much for getting my thoughts un-jumbled. I figured it may not be a good time to talk to her or even bother her with my useless presence anyway, but I approached her all the same. I just wanted to see if she'd be alright before I started something.

Sitting down across from her at the table, I said, "I hear it's unhealthy to brood alone."

She didn't say anything in return, but her expression softened a little and she stopped smelling like she was afraid or something. I was glad my presence brought some measure of comfort to her but if she didn't speak then I couldn't help.

"I take it this is my turn to be Shepard and try to get you to talk?" I inquired rhetorically, earning a tiny quirk of the lip from Shepard. "Alright then." I confirmed, trying not to sound as if I had no idea of what to say.

We sat there for a few moments in a slightly tense, slightly companionable silence. She still stared at her plate and I gazed upon her lightly, trying not to stare like a creepy neighbor; she was beautiful. How did I not notice before?

"So…" I started, rubbing my palms together under the table. Shepard still said nothing, but her smile spread just a little in response. It was better than nothing at least.

There were a few more moments of silence as we sat there. The air almost seemed warmer and less heavy causing me to think my body was reacting in some strange way to whatever the situation was.

"What's your favorite color?" I asked with a smirk, making Shepard blow out a small laugh. I could see she loosened up a little as well, relieving me a bit; at least I knew Shepard liked quirkiness almost as much as she did my sarcasm. Perhaps it was simple playfulness on my part though, as rare as it was.
"I'm guessing…" I started, tapping my chin in mock thought as I assessed Shepard's expression. She looked back to me then, her eyes practically shining. My heart literally back-flipped at the seemingly simple gesture, surprising me less than I'd have thought. Maybe it was because I finally knew how I felt toward Shepard, as inconvenient as it was.
"Blue?" I asked. She shook her head, smirking a little bigger. "Green." I suggested. She shook her head once more and Ciria almost grumbled to herself at my antics.

Before I could say another random color, Shepard reached out and took hold of a lock of my hair, curling it around her finger. I found myself stuck and unable to move in the slightest. My breath seemed too thin as I stared back, into her endless emerald eyes. Who knew I would be so sensitive to the Commander once I found out about my real emotions…?

"Red." She said quietly. My mind instantly went blank as my cheeks suddenly started to burn, no doubt turning as red as my hair. The response only served to make Shepard smile wider, no doubt pleasing her in some way. It wasn't as if she had power over me. Okay, even I knew that was a lie...
"You make a pretty good Shepard, Raegas." She added, before releasing my hair and pulling her hand back. I had to stop myself from stopping her. My hands actually itched and grew restless with the need to touch Shepard and feel her skin.

Perhaps this was a side-effect of telling myself I could never be with her? I suppose it was also caused by several other reasons I'd rather not think about in the first place. As much as I wanted to tell Shepard, I couldn't. I was too afraid of what could happen and what I would change if I went too far. Hell, I was probably too far at the moment.

"Nah… I'm not one for all the attention…" I replied, trying to speak correctly even as my tongue seemed to swell. The reply seemed to calm her from thinking she freaked me out though, so that was all well at least. I may not have been used to being touched often, but it wasn't as if I was bothered by it too considerably. Not when it was Shepard, anyway.
"Anyway, I uh… just figured I could…" I trailed off, not finding the words I needed to continue. I suppose my brain was still frozen thanks to Shepard's little stunt. If anything, I'd just mange to embarrass myself more if I tried too hard to continue.

As if in understanding, Shepard nodded to herself. The look in her eyes as she glanced back down at the table told me she was either trying to say something to herself or trying to think of what to say to me. I decided to take the initiative once more, knowing she would be slow to speak. At least my brain was starting to calm down. Sort-of.

"Look, what happened down there… I'm sorry I couldn't do anything to help this time, it's just…" my voice faded when Shepard smiled at me, no doubt sensing the turmoil in me thanks to that stupid bond.

"Raegas, you've saved my life several times already, each time in crazy circumstances. Just because your siblings come up with some way to help everyone as well doesn't make you any less valuable." She stated. Her words actually calmed me and put some of those worries to rest.

It almost seemed as if she knew me better than I did myself…

"Same goes for you, Shepard." I muttered, clasping my hands together under the table to try and get rid of their persistent itching. It was quickly starting to irritate me more than I'd have liked.

"I think we know each other enough for you to use my real name, Raegas." Shepard smiled warmly even though I could sense the hesitation and worry in her. If I used her first name then I'd just grow even more attached, which was one thing I couldn't afford.

"Shepard…" I started, looking down.

"I know you don't want to get hurt, but if you can't open up then you'll never be happy. I know you don't want to hear this and I know we can't deal with this for real until we've dealt with Saren, but…" she stopped, seemingly giving up when she saw my tense expression.

She began to stand then, but I grabbed her wrist before even I knew I'd moved, keeping her in place. We stared into each other's eyes once more and I had to keep myself from falling into hers again lest I forget what our conversation was even about. She seemed as surprised as I felt, her mouth agape and her body still.

I started to open my mouth, wanting to say just what I felt about everything. This simple reflex of my body told me just what I needed to know- and more. I had grown too close to Shepard, but even so, in that moment, I couldn't care less. Not by much, anyway, seeing as how there was a frantic voice in my head, screaming at me to stop.

"Shepard, I-" I whispered, trying to think of what to say.

"Ma'am?" both Shepard and I were shocked from our respective trances by a crewman holding a datapad out to Shepard, looking confused. How long had he been standing there?

I let go of Shepard and stood in my seat, controlling my inward desire to maul the crewman for ruining whatever moment I'd just been in. then again, perhaps I should've been grateful for him snapping me out of it before I could tell Shepard just what I'd told myself not to. I'd have to find out a way to lock up my emotions again or they could very well cause more problems than we needed. Even so, I still wanted to punch the guy in the face.

After Shepard signed whatever was on the datapad, the crewman left, blushing. He probably caught my murderous glare when I stood up. Shepard turned to me then, catching my attention once more. I couldn't say anything more at the moment, and now that the moment was ruined and my feelings were once more in check, there was no way I'd continue what I'd almost said.

"I'll… just be going then." Shepard muttered, sounding and smelling of disappointment. Perhaps she'd had a feeling as to what I was going to say? No, there was no way she could sense that much; she was human, after all, not Vertoakan.

She turned to leave and I felt my heart speed up as adrenaline started to jump through me. Shepard began to walk away and I clenched my teeth, refusing to call after her, refusing to say anything. I couldn't use her real name for fear I would lose myself like I almost just did moments before. I couldn't afford-

"Aerin!" dammit.

Shepard paused in her walking and stood still as a statue for a few moments as if registering what I'd just yelled, what I'd just called her by.

Slowly, ever so slowly, she turned to face me. We locked gazes instantly and I had no power over myself as a small smile tugged at the corners of my mouth in seeing her shock. At least I could surprise 'the great Commander Shepard' still.

"You have to use my real first name as well." I stated. The Commander nodded after another minute of staring at me, her eyes absolutely lighting up even as her face barely stayed in control.

She left then, her ecstatic smile the last I saw of her before she turned the corner.

A/N: I hope you liked this mostly-happy chapter and all you guys, especially since I actually tried to make it so. And I'm sick, so you can't be mean. Please? ;-;