I never realized before how pretty she had been when I first saw her properly in the hands of that vampire, she would have been more pretty if her skin was radiating her pulsing blood. Her abnormal deathly pale skin didn't suit her and as I moved over her and touched her fragile skin she felt cold. I dropped to my knees beside her, and saw the first thing which caught my sight was that she had a locket around her neck.

It was simular to the one I had at home, the locket from my mother but the difference being that hers was a gleaming silver locket. Who did she get hers from? She was young. Fourteen, fifteen maybe and now she lay on the cold grass lifeless, away from her home, family, friends.......

I could hear Jake in the background rustling his way thought the tree's, but I continued on looking at the girl. As I looked closer at her locket I saw her name carved into it. 'Lucy' A cold twinge pulled over me, Like a sudden wave of sadness or guilt.....I could then hear Jake on the phone but again I ignored what he was saying and focused on the girl.

I slid my arms under her and picked her up and cradled her to my chest, I could feel the tears build in my eyes and the bulge tighten in my throat and in an instantJacob was at my side. The girls head flopped back and her hair dragged along the floor. I couldn't take my eyes away from her, she was just a child........Jake put his large warming handa around my waist.

"Ness" He said in a worried tone.

"Shes so young Jacob...." I blurred out.

"Shhhs.....Its ok....its....." I cut into his words fast.

"How can it be ok? I kil....I killed her" A few tears escaped my battered eyes,

"Look at me." I couldn't move, "Ness look at me....." His hand lightly grasped my chin and pulled my head up. His deep brown eyes reflected my own horror but I suspect that his is not the same form as mine. "Don't you say you killed her...." I tried to cut in but his thumb pressed on my lips. "Do you hear me RenesmeeCullen? You did not kill this girl. It was an accident....thats all a accident."

He frowned his brow, and removed his thumb from my lips. Both of his hands moved to my face and in a simultaneous movement both of his hands messaged my cheeks, so gently, so lovingly.

"Im not meant to harm humans..." More pain flashed across his face- and I couldn't believe the words pouring out of my lips myself. I was naturally blaming myself, the human part of me cried out in the pain of taking anothers life. Its hard to explain its like if you cooked a meal for someone and then they suddenly start choking- even though you did nothing and the food was perfect you would still feel guilt as you gave them the food they choked on....

"You didn't" he whispered in my ear.

"No matter what I do, I end up hurting someone. Last year it was you, and now....." More tears were released free and streamed down my face, re-hydrating some of my dried blood from earlier on, "I've killed a human. A child................." My words trailed off.

Jake's horrified face could not believe the words at which I was saying, He picked up the girl from my lifeless grasp and placed her gently on the floor next to him. His hands grasped around my body pulling me into a tight hug. He positioned his body so that I was not looking at the girl but instead had my back to her.

"Listen....." He was choking on his words, "You can say that you have killed anyone, .....do you hear me. You are not akiller Ness, and you never could be.....You are the sweetest person in my life." I sighed at the term 'person', "How could a " he choked more so on the next words"killer' hold my heart.....because it simply can't be. You are a angel, my angel. You have brought me to life so many times. Your presence makes my life livable. You do not have a bad bone in your body, and I can see that. I can feel that, you are a piece of me Ness. Please don't hurt yourself........don't emotionally kill yourself from this...this accident.............Let me put it another way 'Did you bite this girl?" He waited for a answer....."Did you bite this girl?"

Through my tears I replied ....."No..but"

He caught the fleeting tears with his fingers, "No but's, Please don't do this to yourself. My Nessie I can't see you go through this pain....please see. Hear me. It was a accident caused by the vampire" I could tell he was careful on his choice for the 'vampire'.

He held me more tight to his chest, he tried to sooth me some more while I sobbed uncontrollably into his bare chest. "You are the petal on my stem, you are the wings on my butterfly, you are the sun in the sky, you are the heart in my soul" He was reciting the poem he once gave to me last valentines day. He had written it himself but even as it had turned my hear to goo it wasn't even breaking through my outer shell now.".........can't you see how pure you are Ness. Please ......" his voice broke and it fell silent.

This was stressing him out, the pain in his face as he tried to convince me that I wasn't .....evil. But I couldn't listen. I knew what had happened, but if I had of reacted faster, or not taken this road, or even not even suggested that we go for a ride......she could still be.....but no that creature would have still drained her body.

So was it inevitable either way? But I just couldn't shake off this lifeless girls face and even though I knew in my heart that she would have died anyway. But it still didn't take away the fact that the car I was driving had smashed into her fragile body and it was that which had killed her......

I couldn't look at them not yet, so in the fraction of a second- before they approached us. I sucked in my tears and wiped the few tears on my cheeks away with the corner of the blanket which was wrapped around Jake. This was a show even for Jake, even though I felt no were near fine, he was suffering from seeing me suffering and it seems to be inevitable in our relationship for us to be in pain-like last year and now- so for his sake I was going to pretend to be 'fine' so that at least he can be slightly happier.

"You..right" I whispered in his ear, my voice still crackling from the lump in my throat. "It was just the shock of seeing her like ..this"

"Its ok. Im here" he said, his hand was stroking my hair, He was here, and the tightness of his hug meant that he wasn't going anywhere. I melted into his chest just waiting for the others to now come up to us.....the three of us.

* * *

Hey I hoped you liked this......? I know she is blaming herself but I feel that it would be the human side of her to suffer like this (I mean imagine yourself in that position-I would be in tears too) I also am very sorry if you don't like me 'killing a young girl' but if you are remember that it is fiction. Nessie needs this to happen to have more emotional pain sort of drown her, its not that I like the thought of her taking pain this way (and as explained in the future) but I love it when other characters have to be there and support her......especially JACOB!

I have actually now decided to do Two JACOB POV'S just because in the next chapter I feel it would fit in well (and its only a short one :() but I still have one planned for future chapters - so yeah you get more of Jacobs thoughts- basically when he sees ness in pain.

P.S WOULD LOVE TO HEAR YOU THOUGHTS ESPECIALLY ON THIS CHAPTER BECAUSE OUT OF THEM ALL SO FAR THIS WAS THE MOST DIFFICULT TO WRITE 'LOL'. I just love -(though not blowing my own 'trumpet') Jakes little poem- I like to make him sweet and just showing that he remembers nearly all things which have gone on between them......and how much Ness actually means to her in the way of imprinting. (because I feel that even if she didn't want to be with him, he would be happy with her decisions (not like he was with Bella).

Anyway sorry for rant....in next chap like i said Jakes POV and more on characters who arrived ....and the rest of family reactions xxxxxxlove you all and love all of you who have commented and made my day - literally ever time I read a review.