Where does Iain Stewart Kirland live?

In Russia's house...

"Ummm…. Mr Russia. W-where are you going?" Lithuania asked as Russia packed vodka into a crate.

"England's house, da!" He replied with a grin.

Latvia trembled and spoke up. "D-d-did Mr E-england invite y-you over? T-t-that's strange, I t-thought he h-h-hated you."

Russia smiled menacely at the small country before returning to his preparations. "Nyet. I'm just dropping by for a surprise visit."

"Is there a reason, Mr Russia?" Estonia asked.

"Da! I want to see England's older brother." The three Baltic States froze and stared at Russia.

"W-w-which one?"

"Scotland, da!"

"Mr Scotland?" Russia glanced at Latvia.

"Do you know of him?"

Estonia answered because Latvia looked ready to faint from fear. "Y-yes Mr Russia… Scotland trades frequently with us. We rely heavily on each other's trade… We rarely actually meet in person though…" Russia looked surprised but then he broke out into a beam.

"That's good, da! I'm going to pick him up now!"

"P-p-pick him up?"

"Da! I want to collect him. He's going to be our new pet." The three nations merely nodded as Russia strode out of the house with a box of vodka. When the tall country was gone, the trio glanced at each other.

"Should we~" "~tell England~" "~and Scotland?" They exchanged another look. Lithuania picked up the phone and dialled for England. He looked worried when it went straight to voice mail. He looked at Estonia and Latvia.

"I will try phoning later…" They nodded in agreement.

In England's house…

"Thanks Japan!... Yeah I will be there soon!... Where am I? I'm in Arthur's living room at the moment…. Hahahaha yeah…. He just offered me those scone things that taste bad."

"America! Don't say bad things about my cooking to Japan. My scones are delicious!" America laughed at that.

"They taste awful! Hmmm…" He turned back to the phone. "Really! Cool dude!... No I would love to try your new video game! What is it called?... 'Zombie Slaughter Zone II'! Awesome! I loved the first one!"

England sighed and began ignoring the conversation between America and Japan. America had decided to gate crash his house then monopolise his phone. The young American could be so obnoxious and annoying at times.

He just hoped that no one tried to call him today…

In Scotland's house…

"L'Ecosse. I finished ze bouillabaisse! (fish soup from the south of France!)"

"Braw…." Scotland looked up from his newspaper at France who had just finished cooking the soup. It smelled good.

"Tu 'ave bien poisson in ton rivers. I uzed ze Scottish zalmon and a bit of ze trout."

France had been cooking all of Scotland's meals in payment for keeping the handcuffs keys secret when he and England got chained together. France smiled as he poured the soup into two bowls.

"Bon Appetite."

"Cheers." Scotland grabbed a bowl. "Whit's fer dessert?" France pouted.

"L'Ecosse. Tu juzt got ton food!" Scotland blew on the hot liquid before popping it in his mouth, grinning.

"Aye and it's delicious like usual but I still wannae ken whit's fer dessert." France chuckled as Scotland ate the food with delight.

"Ohonhonhonhon. Tu still 'ave such a zweet tooth. It's un gâteau au chocolat!" Scotland grinned wider.

"Barry!"

The two talked with each other animatedly. The reason for the beginning of their friendship was poor but once you got past that, they actually got on very well with each other most of the time. (A/N – I'm going to do a story on how France and Scotland actually met and became friends soon. I promise.)

France told him about how he managed to have sex with a Scottish woman a couple of nights ago and that was basically like doing Scotland himself. The redhead had scoffed and rolled his eyes at the idea but found the thought amusing.

Scotland told him about his new girlfriend. A pretty young Scottish girl called Jenny. Apparently, they had been going out for a fortnight or so.

The blonde then told him, that according to his theory, that was the same as masturbating. Scotland gave him a light punch to the arm, playfully as they laughed and thought about the theory more.

If France's theory was true, then France had successfully managed to have sex with most, if not all, of the nations in the world and Scotland had manage to have sex with China, Germany and Belgium. France also pointed out that Scotland would be guilty of incest because of some English girlfriends and the couple of Irish and Welsh girlfriends he also once had.

They talked about some of their past lovers and girlfriends and other things that made them laugh loudly for a while, waiting for the cake to finish baking. Scotland managed to get through two bottles of whiskey while France had finished a whole wine bottle themselves.

In London….

Russia had no idea where Scotland lived. He had originally thought that Scotland would naturally live at his younger brother's house. The Baltic trio lived with him so it seemed natural that four, if not all five, brothers would share the same roof.

He didn't know the exact whereabouts of England's home though...

He knew it was near London. The only times he had been to England's house was whenever he was accidently summoned through so magic portal. It was a very quick and convenient way to travel but you had no idea how to get there on foot or by car.

He had just asked a shy looking woman at the reception desk in England's parliament building, it was easy to find with a road map.

"Where is Arthur Kirkland's house, da?" He knew England's human name but not Scotland's. She replied by asking why. This must be a security thing so I better answer truthfully, he thought.

"I wish to see his older brother…. The oldest one…" He was unable to give a human name. She gave a tiny snort before blushing slightly.

"The Kirklands do not live with each other…"

"Oh?"

"They have a habit of trying to rip each other's throat out if they remain in each other's presence for too long…" She added with a small smile, like it was a joke. "The oldest brother is called Iain Stewart Kirkland." She said his name delicately. Her blush had not faded.

"Where does Iain live then?" Her blush darkened slightly.

"What is your business with Iai~ Mr Kirkland?" Russia guessed that Scotland and this girl might have had a romantic relationship at one point for her to blush like that.

"A friendly visit. I simply wish to chat, da."

"Your name is?"

"Ivan Braginski." She nodded and made a quick phone call. Once she placed the phone down, she turned to the tall Russian. "Mr Braginski. It seems you have special clearance to see Mr Kirkland."

She scribbled down an address and rough directions. She folded them up and handed them to him with a wide smile. She signalled for him to lean forward a little. Russia complied. She paused before whispering. "Tell Iain that Maria says 'Hi'."

Russia nodded with a slight smile. He wasn't really planning on passing on the message. He didn't want his Scotland to be distracted by anyone.

In Scotland's house...

"L'Ecosse. Tu do not have any dark chocolate?"

"Nar. It's tae bittar"

They were still in the kitchen, with the chocolate cake cooling. France was trying to make icing but had no dark chocolate. Scotland was sipping on his whiskey and smoking. France tsked.

"I 'ave to go out and buy ze chocolate then. I'll be gone pour half un heure."

"Aye."

"I might be longer."

"Aye." France stopped.

"Do I get a kiss au revoir?"

"I have a girlfriend, Jenny."

"So iz zat a oui or a non?"

"Goodbye France." France pouted as Scotland swished his hand dismissively at him, telling him to shoo already.

"Juzt pour zat, I'll going to be longer on purpose. I might not be back pour trios heures now." France said slyly, still trying to tempt/force Scotland to kiss him. Scotland sighed.

"I've gotta girlfriend. Jus' go fuck someone else in tha' time if yer gonnae take three hoors!" He sounded gruff and annoyed so France chuckled, leaving.

"Oui. It will be a Scottish person though. Zat way it will be like fucking tu!" He said it in a singsong voice. Scotland growled as France skipped out the door, cheerfully.

"Edjit… I've gotta girlfriend!" He muttered to himself as he returned to reading his paper.

The door bell rang. Scotland answered the door.

"Are tu zure tu doez not wizh to kizz?"

"Gah git yer damn dark chocolate France!" He slammed the door shut.

The door bell rang again a few minutes later and Scotland stomped back to the door. He yanked it open forcefully.

"Fer fuck's sake France! I' nae gonnae kis~ Oh!"

The redhead stopped mid sentence when he saw that it wasn't France. He glanced up to look the man at the door in the face. Scotland paused before breaking out into a grin.

"Russia, right?"

(A/N -

Someone asked if I name Scotland Ian. The answer is yes and no. It can be Ian or Iain depending on where you come from. I prefer using Iain but some of the characters may call him Ian from time to time.

Now the others:

Scotland = Iain Stewart Kirkland (Nickname - Alba)

Ireland = Seamus Duffy Kirkland (No nickname as he is offended very easily. He will punch anyone who gives him a nickname...)

North Ireland = Patrick 'Paddy' Kirkland (Nickname - Paddy)

(Paddy can be a derogative and can be short for Patrick so can be an insult or a nickname…. It matches North Ireland quite well as people tend to insult him alot but he doesn't care or notice. Some times he takes them as a compliment though. He is overly cheerful and happy-go-lucky like that.)

Colin Kirkland (Nickname - Cymru)

Arthur Kirkland (Nickname - Artie or Iggy)

This is mainly a transition chapter. I had to think of a way to get Russia to Scotand without England finding out. It was hard going... It took me a while to write this. It flicks between locations abit.

I'm going to have to change this story to a 'M' soon... Some of my ideas later on will require it... There will be no pairings or lemon scenes later on but (I'm trying not to give spoilers here) there is a lot of partial lemon and mention of mature things that might require a higher rating... Maybe I will just post warnings at the begining of storys and chapters?... What do you guys think?

Review please!)