A/N: Yeah, I can't believe I'm posting this either. Four days out from what ended up as a rather major surgery and I wrote almost 3,500 words.
Xxxx
Remus had known Severus for 23 years and liked him for none of those. The talk that they had only a day prior had enlightened Remus to just what Severus was going to do. It came as no surprise when the painfully familiar falcon appeared in front of him in the early hours of morning. The soft glow of the Patronus glimmered around him casting its light over his surroundings. Lily's voice ever soft and sweet drifted from the bird's beak, penetrating his heart. She was clueless, but he wasn't.
Severus was guarded, that fact had been painfully obvious for years, but today was different. Maybe Lily was right, the walls of his mind had crumbled in Azkaban, leaving him to cover up the truest parts of himself with dust. Maybe Remus himself had grown better at seeing what lay beyond or maybe Severus was too excited to truly hide what was to happen.
Severus' eyes had sparkled like stars in the night sky, the whole galaxy available for view. As long as Remus had known him, they had been dark and dull with no hint of magic inside. Seeing him now, Remus wasn't sure how Lily had remained completely oblivious. He wondered if maybe this was the side she always got to see of him. She told Remus, told all the Marauders that there was more beneath the surface If only they dared to look, but they never had.
Behind the stone like façade Severus carried, Remus assumed that he was capable of love, of feeling for another person. It occurred to him then that maybe all these years they'd been wrong, that Lily was privy to a Severus that no one else was. Remus supposed she had done the same to him, to James, that of the three men she had been with, she knew them better than anyone else.
Severus had given him a knowing nod as he stepped away, his hand on Lily's back like she was a possession. Remus had brooded the entire time they were gone, the scene of when it had been him replaying in his mind.
Remus had taken her to a muggle establishment, both of them preferring to be live amongst people not so different from them from time to time. He was a half-blood, and her muggleborn, it wasn't hard for them to fit in. it had happened during a time of safety, just before Voldemort solidified his return. It was on this day that they were separated from danger by only a thin veil, when it was torn back, they were exposed to the harshness of war they thought they left behind them.
It was for this reason, at first, that Remus didn't understand the rejection. He had proposed only weeks before their world fell apart, but they had been clueless of it then. They'd been too wrapped up in the warmth they had created with one another, a permanent shield charm protecting them from the outside world.
He had fallen to one knee, had lifted up the gold ring he had selected, had proposed beneath the flicker of candlelight and too much wine. Her hands had come to her mouth in excitement, and his own heart fluttered with victory. Such a reaction couldn't mean no. But, it did. Her hands drooped almost immediately, her eyes welling with tears and every other restaurant patron watched as she told him no, she couldn't. That had been the end of it all, the bubble surrounding them bursting. They had gone to their separate homes that night, had slept alone in their beds, and his heart had frozen in his chest. Never had he been good enough.
He wondered why she had led him on, why after three years of intimate moments it had amounted to nothing. She'd been happy when he began to kneel, began to tell her how much he loved her, but that had crumbled quicker than he could understand. In the weeks that passed, they remained distant. With Harry at the school, there had been no need to see one another. It had been Harry that brought her back.
"Remus!"
His name erupted to life in the previously quiet home. He jerked, whether he was more frightened by the sudden sound, or the meaning behind the urgency that dripped from the letters of his name, he wasn't sure. He rushed from his study, abandoning his armchair, following the sounds of her sobs.
"He's...he's got him." She stammered, hunched in on herself as if it could suppress the pain. "Voldemort." She began again, her voice suddenly dry from the weight of his name. "Voldemort has Harry." Behind her, the embers of the floo flickered
His arms instinctively went around her, reenacting a hold he had done countless times in the last three years. He pressed her head to his chest, attempting – to no avail – to soothe her. Remus knew his own heart beat wildly inside his chest, that his limbs burned with the urgency to flee, to search, but he had nothing. "Where has he taken him?" He asked instead.
Lily wiped at the wetness that had taken over her face, at the tears that mixed with the snot trailing from her nose. "He's in the castle. Voldemort disguised himself as a teacher."
He gripped her more tightly, preparing to apparate when she stopped him.
"No, we can't. We can't just burst in there. It'll only put him in more danger."
"No, but we can wait in the hospital wing."
The sound of fire bursting to life shook him from his thoughts. Green hues spilled into the room, taking a purple haired woman with it. "Severus Snape?" Her smile was bright as she stared at him, as if Severus had done little more than litter in the park.
It was too easy, too easy to play along, and for a moment, Remus was interested. "I'm afraid you've just missed him." He stood, his body deflating with what could have been a prank. "He and his…" Remus' voice trailed, suddenly curious if Lily was his fiancé, if the world could even know they were together. "He had errands to run, I'm merely babysitting." He motioned to the room, finding it childless.
He watched as the purple of the woman's hair grew red at the tips, the color snaking up her hair as she examined a parchment she had brought. "I don't have here that he has kids." Her voice came out as a mumble, a combination of confusion and surprise settling in her features.
When she looked up at him again, he felt his cheeks burn red and he cleared his throat. "It would be best to speak to him about it, I think."
"Well, yes. That is why I'm here."
Her right hand went to her hip in exasperation while the other – parchment still clasped between her fingers – fell to her side. "It is Friday, isn't it?"
"Thursday, I'm afraid." He puckered his lips, an effort to keep a laugh from escaping him. Remus watched, expecting a blush to flutter across her cheeks, for her to make some sort of excuse.
Instead, she sighed, her hair now fully scarlet. "Not again. Scrimgeour is going to be ecstatic." She rolled her eyes, the words spoken more to herself than to him.
"Scrimgeour, you're an auror?"
"Not for long by looks of it." She laughed, giving a shake of her head at her own stupidity. "Tonks, yourself?" She held her hand out, silently asking for him to shake as if this was little more than a business proposal.
He took it, the name sounding strangely familiar. The Black family entered his mind, but not understanding the association, he shook it away. "Remus Lupin, and I believe you forgot a name."
"It's the only one you need."
"Right…" He pointed a thumb over his shoulder, gesturing to the flat behind him. "The boys are being suspiciously quiet. I should probably have a look at them. Severus knows you're coming tomorrow?" He stepped back, expecting her to confirm his question and then depart. Instead she followed.
"Yes, at least one of us is capable of remembering the date. You're his friend?"
The burn of laughter he'd felt grow in his chest again was extinguished by her question. "It's more of an…obligated relationship."
"You know him well?" Tonks ignored the fact they were standing beside a door, the chattering of children drifting through it.
It was another question he didn't want – or know how – to answer. "I suppose, but now really isn't the time."
She nodded, her mouth flattening. She turned her head almost imperceptibly listening to the young voices before she spoke again. "I'll be in touch."
Remus found himself staring at her blue eyes as she stood only a meter in front of him. He wondered distantly if she could change the color of those as well. At his thought, her hair flooded with purple once more, any sign of red now hidden beneath it.
"A pleasure, Mr. Lupin." She gave him a broad smile, each of her white teeth peeking though her lips before she turned, heading back to the fireplace once more.
Listening to the whoosh of flames, befuddled by the encounter that had just occurred, he pushed the door inwards just a crack. The movement had been subtle, neither of the boys noticing that it had even happened. They sat on different ends of the room, one looking so much like James and the other Severus. There was as much space between them as they could muster, and books spread about
Remus watched the two boys, regarding the distance that had grown between them seemingly in hours. They'd been close enough in age that for many years, they'd been joined at the hip, one boy always following after the other. There was little difference between them, the greatest of all being Harry's scar. On more than one occasion, they had been confused as twins, and rightfully so. Remus had always laughed to himself at the fact, as much as Severus and James had hated one another, they sure created similar offspring
He was certain both men would be disgusted at such a thought and wondered distantly just how Severus felt about the idea. He had proffered little insight to how he felt about either child, particularly the one who wasn't biologically his. Remus wondered if Severus hadn't known Harry as an infant, if he would be blinded by such hatred now.
Xxxx
Lily remained where she was, in the space of Severus' chest, his lap that seemed to have been crafted just for her. Here, beyond the castle gates, beside him, she felt the safest she had in so long. Hogwarts had always been a sanctuary of sorts. It had been the place that she discovered who she was, had crafted herself into the witch she was today. Now, it was the place that Harry, the rest of her family, could be safe. She was out of Voldemort's grasp.
What had happened to Harry his first year wouldn't happen again, she was sure of it. This year brought Remus. He'd be teaching just floors above. She was grateful to have her friend here. The two of them were forever entwined. They had been there for each other when no one else could be. When all of them – James, Sirius, Severus – had been taken away, Remus was there.
In a time where she could love no one else, she had loved him, but she supposed it wasn't enough. When Remus had proposed, she didn't feel like she did now. Lily had been ecstatic, but it had been immediately burdened with questions, with what ifs. Here, Severus' arms around her, all that she could feel was home.
"I think it would be best if we went inside. Relieved Lupin."
With her head pressed to his chest, his words were deeper than usual, and time seemed to freeze around them as he spoke slowly. She sighed, removing herself. Her hair clung to his robes, no part of her wanting to leave him. She smoothed it, taking a glance at the glittering ring that now rested on her finger. She hadn't had one there in so long and it felt heavy and unusual.
She stood from the grass, brushing away the bits that had stuck to her robes. She heard the shifting of Severus beside her as he stood, gripping the sides of her robes and drawing her near. "It wasn't how I had planned it. Circumstances being what they are changed that." His voice was a quiet hum near her ear, and she relaxed into him.
She felt his lips brush the crown of her head. "It wasn't spur of the moment?"
Severus' chest rose in a soundless laughter, a huff through his nose more than anything. "Have you ever known me to do things on a whim?"
It was true, that wasn't how he preferred to exist. But, Lily wondered how long he had considered it, if that had been why he disappeared. "It was perfect." She answered finally, really not needing anything else, not ever expecting even this. He was so reserved to the outside world, so unlike the other men she had known, had been with. Beneath the mask he always wore, he was sentimental, caring, even if it was only towards her. She was privy to a version of him the rest of the world didn't get to see.
She supposed Azkaban had changed him in many ways. It had still only been weeks since his escape. She had seen few residual effects, what was visible being only physical. She'd only received small moments of time with him and she wondered now how much that would change now that they'd be living in such close quarters.
Lily knew he tried to hide from her, tried to hide the world to keep her safe, and she wondered as they walked beside the lake, back towards the Castle door, just how much she would learn about him now.
Xxxx
"You had a visitor" Remus' gruff voice sounded the minute they'd stepped through into the dungeon that was now their home. Severus stared at the book held gently between the man's fingers and Lily noticed the uncertainty that crossed his features.
Remus stood, replacing the book in its designated shelf amongst the other bookcases that lined the wall. Lily caught sight of the deep red cover; the white writing scrawled across it. Dark Arts and Defiance.
Severus narrowed his eyes and she felt her own seed of worry begin to blossom, nearly every person that knew of his existence, that knew him well enough to be a welcome visitor was in this room. "Who?" His eyes trailed from the book that Remus had been holding and onto the man's face. Lily stood behind him, watching their encounter with apprehension, she always did. They acted like generals, but battled their wars like children. She was never able to quite trust them when they were together.
"Some auror?" Remus shrugged as if it wasn't important. "She didn't seem entirely…competent."
Severus rolled his eyes in agreement, exasperation filling him. "Considering she thought we met today, I'd say so."
"The boys?" Lily interrupted and they let her. She wasn't sure what else the two of them would have talked about. Severus was trying with the man, she had to give him that, but it was clear that didn't mean he liked it.
Remus gestured to the room a ways behind him. "Been holed up studying for the new year. I brought a few books of my own for them to read. I don't think I could tear them away from Selvan if I wanted to." His eyes jerked toward Severus' for a split second, all of them knowing where that love for knowledge had come from. His eyes fell next to Lily's hand. Silence spread between them, distancing any attempt at conversation. Instead, he gave a nod, turning towards the fireplace. Green enveloped him before he'd said much of a goodbye, leaving the two of them alone.
The tension turned into something else as Lily drew him close. She felt an urge to make him hers, and she suspected he felt the same. It was hard to break Selvan from his reading, it always had been. With Harry beside him, they should have time. Just enough.
She tightened her hold on his hand, pulling him backwards and he didn't fight. He watched her as a lion hungry for his prey, ready to devour her and she was ready to let them. Gone were the days where passion began where they stood. The need for each other would have to be held down, if only temporarily.
When the door behind them had been closed, locked, and the appropriate charms for discretion cast, their hunger ignited. He kissed her so fiercely yet held her face so gently it was as if he wanted to break her, but was afraid she may be shattered completely. It was a demanding gesture that she forced back, her nails clawing at his shirt as she tried to peel it from him, tried to free the skin that was beneath so that she may run her hands, her lips, her tongue along him. May draw him into her in every sense.
She tore at the buttons that prevented this desire and they cascaded to the floor, near silent pings falling around them as the threads came lose. She forced the sleeves of the painfully necessary cloth down his arms. Mossy green light – that of the sun shining through the black lake – cascaded over him, made brighter by the paleness of his skin
Severus separated the embrace, the hurried kisses they'd been afraid to end. He bent instead, his hand starting at her calf, just below the hem of her plum colored dress. It slid slowly up her skin, a millimeter of space between them. She admired the view of him, the visible vertebrae of his spine. Even his imperfections she couldn't help but love.
As he reached it, he squeezed her arse, a gasp of surprise falling from her lips. He placed his arm beneath her, and she wrapped her legs around his waist, leaving her feeling weightless from both the position he had created by lifting her, and mere fact of being here with him.
Like butterflies fluttering against her skin – or perhaps, in his case, moths – Lily felt him flutter around her kissing what exposed skin she had. She gave a soft, exhaling moan as she bunched the hem of her robes into her hand. She pulled back just enough to remove the garment., her bra following after. Her hair cascaded around her, the strands tickling her already sensitive shoulders. She shuddered and he pressed himself closer, mistaking the shivers for cold.
The embers of his passion danced about her, warming her soul with his. She could feel his love for her radiating off him, knowing that while their intimate moments together had never been "just sex", they had evolved to become so much more.
She drew closer to that release, feeling a wetness pool between her legs. It didn't take long with him. He had memorized all her sweet spots, knew all the ways to touch her to get her to this moment. A tingle ran up her spine as his kiss wandered from her mouth. It ran down her chin, her throat, trailing as a waterfall down her being. "Sev..." She could just make out the first three letters of his name, and heard hears in return, mumbled between her breasts. Their words met each other, their breath mingling to become one just as they did.
The hold he'd had behind her neck was dropped and she felt the soft touch of the mattress beneath her next, the velvety blanket rubbing against her bare flesh. Severus removed his trousers, everything that had remained, and she her panties. They were left standing in their near perfect forms, admiring each other. A crooked smile played on his lips, as if he wasn't sure how to form a full one, that his lips wouldn't work that way.
He leaned forward over her, his elbows on either side, the sunlight just seeping through the gap between them. "I love you." And then he was inside her, all around her, and it couldn't have been more perfect.