Chapter 36: Clouds
I thought we were going back to the room.
I want to know more about this Bespin place and why he wants Kylo to take me there. Im noticing that he is taking a different way. I'm stunned when we end up at the bridge before the Knights room.
"Ohhh noooo, I am NOT going over there." I put both my hands up then cross my arms and pout. No way, he's crazy. Twice I have screwed things up for all of them. I'm glad I know I can take them but I don't ever want to have to do that again.
"Yes you are. You don't have a say in what you do or don't do." And he grabs my arm and drags me over the bridge. Squeezing tight, I try resisting. My hood falls off my head and my hair all over the place. He stops and looks at me then keeps pulling me till we are in front of the door.
'Do you think I would let them hurt you?' He roughly lets my arm go and it sends me stumbling back. He's mad I questioned him.
"Just do as your told" he demands and waves the door open. I sit in the only open chair. and dont dare to look at any of the Knights.
Kylo stands in the Kings spot. "We have new orders, we are going to Bespin to continue our efforts in finding the Resistance, we will use it as home base. I will expect all of you to expand your searches. I don't care what you have to do to get answers. Burn villages to the ground. I want to find them!" Kylos words make my heart bleed. He will always be a monster, and yet I love him. "We leave tomorrow at 0400."
All the Knights get up and leave but I know better and I remain seated. "I thought we were going alone." I say when it's just us in the room.
"I still have a job to do." He says coldly. He doesn't think of me as a job, he says he just enjoys having me there. I don't feel that way most of the time.
My eyes narrow and I look into the black of his mask. "What will you do when you find them?" I ask.
"Obviously eliminate them. Nothing will change what I have to do. I'm just going to do my best to keep you out of it so your conscious is clear." He says. I stand up and slam my hands on the table, which stung more than the point I was trying to make.
"If you think I'm going to just sit back and watch you kill all those innocent people you are a lunatic!" I scream at him.
He slams his fists on the table so hard it ripples under the force. "YOU WILL DO EXACTLY THAT! You would have to kill me to stop me." His mechanical voice sounds so hallow. "And I know you are not going to kill me." He stands up and starts to walk over to me. "Because I won't let you."
"What makes you think I can't?" I grab and ignite my lightsaber. This is the first time I'll be able to use it. Kylo ignites his.
"You really want to try and fight me with the very weapon I gave you." He says. His anger radiating off him and I focus on using it to my advantage and feed off of it, I only have to take 3 steps before our lightsabers meet. I swing at all angles but he meets every one of my hits. He's fast. He force pushes me against the far wall near the door. I get up and send a push to his foot sending him to the ground. I hurry to my feet and swing down on him but meet his saber right above his mask. He rolls over, holds his hand up and freezes me mid swing. He stands up and grabs the lightsaber from my hand and disengages it. He unfreezes me and I sink to the floor like the wind got knocked out of me. He starts circling around me. "When a Apprentice turns on their Master there is a break in their trust."
"Good thing... I'm not just... your apprentice." I say between catching my breath. I stand up and he's arms length away in front of me. "I can not just sit back and allow this to happen to innocent people. Your a monster!" And he waves his hand in front of me and everything goes black.
I wake up groggy on the bed in the white room. My body soar and tired. I sit up and get an awful cramp deep in my core. "Ooooaaaf," I sputter and grab at my pelvic area. It hits again. "Ahhhhhh," I roll back on the bed in the fetal position, clutching at my stomach. In a few minutes the pain passes and I spread out on my stomach, taking deep breaths. Iv never had period cramps like that before. I'm a week or so late, It's probably stress. I burry my face into the pillow. I'll just wait it out and I push the thought into the back of my kind.
The door slides open and Kylo walks in. "When you get unreasonable, sometimes it's better to just shut you up." He says so coldly through his mask. I move my head to the side and blink a few times clearing my vision from being face first in the pillow.
"That's not fair," I state. I press my eyebrows together at him and turn and face the other way out the window. My cloak being used as a blanket around me, I am most thankful for it. He comes and sits on the edge of the bed, I feel it shift as he sits down and I hear the hiss of his mask. He sets it on the bed and I feel him crawl over to me, he places presses his hand in front of my face down on the mattress, he's leaning over me but I can't see his face from the way I'm laying, his body mostly hovered above me. He picks up his hand and brushes the hair out of my faces and over the side of my head, actually bringing him into view. His gloves lights graze my cheek. My hair a no longer protective shield from him.
"Why must you always try and defy me?" He says. I glance up at him then back out the window and then close my eyes. I am so tired all the sudden, like we trained all day. "Are you tired?"
"Mmmm", is the only sound I make. My body half between sleep and awake.
"We have to leave soon." He sighs. I feel him remove his hand next to me, shift his body, and he lays down next to me. His arm goes under my pillow and his other lays on top of my back, his hand wrapped around to my side. He tightens his grip around my waist and pulls me closer to him so his forearm can lay flat across my stomach. My back to his chest and his nose in my hair. He starts rubbing circles along my ribs with his thumb. His touches gentle.
I feel as though I'm dreaming this. "Mm," is all I manage to hum out before my body totally shuts down.
I wake to Kylo gently nudging my shoulder, "Time to go." He's crouched down next to the bed. He brings his hand up and moves a few pieces of crazy hair out of my face. To quick, he stands up and hisses his mask back on. I frown at him and slowly drag myself out of the bed till I'm standing in front of him. My eyes still heavy start to close and I sway a little but his hands catch my shoulders. "Are you sure your okay? You really need to eat." I open my eyes and look up at him. But I can't see his face behind the blackness of his mask,
"I'm just really tired of all of this." I look back down. He slides his hands down my arms and let's go. He turns around and opens the door with a wave of his hand and I follow him, bringing my hood up over my head as we leave the room.
We don't acknowledge each other till we are in hyper speed again, Kylo leaves his helmet on this time. He turns his chair towards me.
"Are you going to put me to sleep again?", I ask. I don't understand why he doesn't like me awake when we are in here. He's so secretive.
"Do you want me to? I just think it's better than enduring the flight." He says, and tilts his head to the side. Waiting for an answer.
"Why? Do you just not want to talk to me?" I ask. I cross my arms and look out the window. I hear the hiss of his mask and he sets it lightly on the ground in between his feet.
"What do you want to talk about? We have a few hours." He's leaning in, his elbows on his knees and hands folded together. "I do not want to argue about the inevitable." His eyes dark when I look over. I swivel my chair to face him.
"Tell me more about you." I tell him. I really know nothing about him yet I love him.
He laughs at me and leans back in his chair and rubs his chin. "Like what?"
"Ummm," and I say the first question that pops in my head, "What's your favorite color?" I feel the red rise to my cheeks. What a strange question to ask him.
He laughs so loud, the loudest I have ever heard. "Black. Obviously. And red." And he smiles and looks at me, he looks so handsome right now. "My turn," he says, "Where did you learn to fly?"
I think for a second, "I studied them a lot. I can fly anything." I'm proud of myself for picking up the ability to navigate myself if need be.
I smirk, "Can I have my lightsaber back now?" His smile disappears and he shakes his head at me. I pout and cross my arms and turn my chair to look back out at the blue hue of passing hyper speed stars and my stomach growls. But the thought of food makes me feel ill. I break out in a cold sweat and I feel all my color drain. Kylo stands up and walks the few feet over to me and kneels in front of my legs. He removes his right glove and cups my cheek and runs his fingers to the back of my neck.
"Your warm. Do you feel ill?" My eyes eyes look down to him. I haven't been feeling good lately, maybe I'm coming down with something.
"I don't know." I say back. I can't really pinpoint what's wrong with me.
"How do you not know?" He says angrily. "Is this why you are not eating?"
"Yeah, but it will pass. My body is overwhelmed. That's all." I can feel my vision blur. I know it's from lack of food and water I just have been refusing. I try and stay focused.
"Your severely dehydrated and your pulse is weak. You must eat as soon as we get to Bespin. I'm ordering you to." His fingers tighten on the back of my neck. He's upset with me. He stands up goes to look at a hologram of his ship hovering above the dashboard.
"What's Bespin?" I ask. I curl my feet under me, using the arm of the chair for my arm support. Laying my head on my arm, just trying to stay awake. Its actually more comfortable than I want to be right now. He turns around.
"It's a all gas planet, consists of only clouds. It's one of our most secretive bases, it's highly equipped with tracking equipment and allows us access to a galaxy archive. We can pinpoint any planet and see what's going on in real time. It's very valuable for this mission..." At that very moment his eyes light up with joy. "The domes in the sky."
"Have you been there before?" I ask, and yawn.
"It's where I trained my Knights." And he turns around and goes back to the hologram. I close my eyes and fall asleep. Dreaming of the flowers in the meadow.
**May the 4th be with all my readers :)**