Snape was by the elevator. Surprise!

He was waiting ever so anxiously for someone to come.

SURPRISE, it's Arnold Schwartzenagger!
No no, just kidding, it's not him. It's the one, the only…

Susan Bones!
So here Snape is, standing there when Susan comes in and doesn't do a thing.

They step in the elevator.
Still silence.

Snape cleared his throat. Nothing annoyed him more than awkward silences.
She stood stock still in the corner.

What did he do last time (i.e. 20 years ago when he was at Hogwarts) to break the silence?

He broke into song. "…We all live in a yellow submarine…"

Still nothing.

He gave his take on different things. "All in all, I think that Dumbledore is a cook. Yes, a cook. Not a kook. Well actually, that too. He's a cooky kook!"
He then break danced.

His cape waved wildly around. His greasy hair swashed in his face.

Susan backed farther into the corner.

What else could he do?
He began to do the single ladies dance. Back and forth, move after move…

Susan seemed to be caving. Let the conversation begin!
"So Susan…" Snape said.

Susan just stood still.

Snape growled and did an angry dance.

He told stories.

Oh no!
Snape forgot to press his floor!
He pressed his floor and Susan just stood.

"Am I pushing your buttons? Does this bother you? Talk already!" Snape said.

Susan just stood.

"Something is up. Are you mad, young lady?" Snape said, raising his eyebrow.

Oh no! Snape forgot to be grumpy!
He did an Alan Rickman pause, "Will you even…talk…at all?"

She just stood back.

He surveyed words. "Colored pencils is such a weird noun. It's like…colored pencils. Which they are. But at the same time…they're not pencils really, they don't have erasers…what's the definition of pencil anyway? Who says so?? Why do people writing the dictionary have to tell us that this is what the word means and if a word isn't in here it's not real?"

And so the rant continued. If Susan was getting agitated or was cracking, she was not showing it.

He had to make her crack. So many others had made him crack; now it was his turn.

"Bam bam, I am Batman!" he howled.

"Do you like waffles? Yeah we like waffles!"
"It's time for yo gabba gabba!"
"lyk omg no wy a hX0r1!1!"
"Man…" Snape said, slumping against the wall, "This is tiring!"
He started to change her name. "Susy Bones, Sue Sylvester..."

By floor -1, Snape realized he only had 88 more floors until he reached his destination!
Snape gasped.

Would he make it home tonight?
"Sleigh bells ring, are you listenin'? No you're not…you don't care…"
Susan just stood.

"Come, let's have a picnic. All the TV remotes can come!"
"With the power of Oxi Clean, you'll never see a stain again!"
"Billy Mays!"
"Can you spare a square?"
"No soup for you!"
"So I put my hands up…"
"I would like some pie."
"Bears. Beets. Battlestar Galactica."
"Beam me up, Scotty!"
"Live long and prosper!"
"I personally have won over 17 Dundie awards."

And the quoting went on and on until Snape wondered if he was going crazy.

Floor -97. Finally Snape cracked.

"Are you going to say something or not?!"
Susan shrugged. "We had budget cuts."
"Huh?"
"It means we can't fund for me to do anything annoying," she said crossing her arms.
Floor -98.

"Wha-"

Floor -99. The elevator dinged and Susan strolled out.

Snape slumped against the wall. "That girl should've been a Ravenclaw, that was rather cunning of her…"

So I updated with a rather loooong chapter. I included some TV show quotes. :) Can you figure out what they're from?

Oh…little review button wants to be clicked! ;)