Authors Note: I promised an update once a week and I am here to deliver. I know, these slow updates are horrible, but I've just got more work intensive classes this semester. I just don't have the time, that and my kids don't seem to realize that the beds in their rooms are actually for sleeping in. Just in case anyone was wondering, I'm not a dancer, not have I ever taken dancing lessons. So, I apologize if I got any of this wrong. Also, not betaed and it's after 1:00 am, so if you see any horrible mistakes, let me know.

Disclaimer: No, they are mine. Amazon sent me an e-mail saying that I was going get them in the mail. Oh, wait, that was just the DVD's. I guess they're not mine after all. (and yes, I've been waiting like 3 months to use that)

What If? Chapter 35: Let's Dance

Jane had become an expert on the various places to sit in the CBI office building. He knew that if you were in Minelli's office that you didn't want to sit in the chairs across from his desk. They are hard and uncomfortable, and if you're going to get a dressing down, you want to be on the couch. It's only slightly more comfortable than the chairs, the frame is hard and the arms to high, but it's more comfortable than those chairs.

In Lisbon's office the chairs are nice, but hands down, the sofa is where someone would find him if they showed up in there unannounced. He still preferred his couch for most every day lounging and procrastinating, but, lately he'd been spending more and more time with Lisbon in her office. They didn't always talk; they didn't always pay attention to each other. It was more that Jane just needed her comforting presence.

Today though he had a specific reason for being in her office, for laying on her sofa, for not saying anything very loudly. It had been six months since Sarah died. Six months to the day. Abby had a dance recital tonight; she had a solo, and a large one at that. She'd been practicing even more than usual for it. He'd tried talking to her as Lisbon had suggested the night they'd got home from that horrible case, but it hadn't really led anywhere.

Sure, she'd told him that she missed her mom, that she was sad about it, but had insisted that she wasn't spending any more time than necessary away from her friends. When he'd asked her about the extra time dancing she'd told him that she decided that she really enjoyed it, and that if she was going to make a living out of it she was going to have to start working harder. That had surprised him. He'd never thought of it as more than just a fun past time for her.

"Are you planning on sitting there all day thinking very loudly, or are you going to talk to me about what's on your mind?" Lisbon asked not looking up from the file on her desk.

"It's been six months." He didn't have to say since what, he knew she would know.

"Abby has a dance recital tonight?"

"How'd you know?" He knew he hadn't told her.

"I overheard you on the phone the other day talking with her dance instructor."

"Oh." He was quiet for a few more minutes. "Would you like to come?"

"I was already planning on it. What time is it at?"

"Seven, same place it was the last time you came to one. Do you want me to pick you up?"

This comment caused Lisbon to finally look up from the file. "Why? I was planning on just leaving from here."

"Really?" Jane looked at her like he didn't believe her. "Or is it that Brian has been bugging you to spend more time with him and if he found out that you were going to be spending time with me he'd be livid?"

"Brian couldn't get livid if he tried. No, I just have some paper work to finish up, and thought I'd just head out from here."

"All right." He'd let it go for now, but she knew she hadn't heard the last of it.

It was an uneventful day after that, Jane left early for home and Lisbon, true to her word, stayed late working on paper work until it was time to go to the recital. It had been over a year and a half since the last time Lisbon had seen Abby dance, though it seemed longer than that. So much had happened since then.

Lisbon sat with Jane, smiling as she slid into the plush seat of the theater. "Where's P.J.?"

"With the nanny, I didn't think he would be able to stay quiet for two hours while everyone dances."

"When's Abby on?"

"She's up last for her solo, but her dance troupe is somewhere in the middle."

They watched as the youngest of the dancers came out onto the stage, the girls in tutus, and the lone boy in a pair of white stirrup pants.

"Are you going to have P.J. take dancing?" Lisbon whispered into Jane's ear.

Ignoring the completely inappropriate shiver that ran down his spin when her breath tickled his ear he whispered back, "I'll let him decide, that's what we did with Abby." The smile that had been toying at his lips when he began started to slip when he thought of Sarah. Lisbon noticed and reached over and grabbed his hand, smiling at him to say she understood, the settled in to watch the rest of the recital.

The dance groups were split by age and ability level. The groups all preformed different types of dances ranging from ballet to tap and more modern dance moves. Abby's group was one of the last to perform before the soloists. They did a jazz number that was truly unique. The solo dancers were all amazing. Lisbon could tell that the dancers had put a lot of time into their routines. The last dancer before Abby was an older teenage couple doing an elegant waltz. The announcer had mentioned that they were going to be going to a regional competition in a few months.

Then it was Abby's turn. The music was soulful and the dance was one of mourning. It wasn't like anything else that had been done that night. Lisbon found herself watching even more intently than she had before. The emotions that it evoked caused tears to prick at the corners of her eyes. Sadness, despair, mourning. This is what went through her.

Without meaning to images of her mother and father came into her mind, thought of her mother's death and her fathers' downward spiral. Thoughts of her child hood and what could have been. Before she knew it the dance was over and everyone was standing applauding.

"She was amazing." Lisbon said as they made their way outside to wait for Abby.

"I know. I'd seen her practicing bits and pieces as she went around the house, but, I hadn't seen it all in one." He was still in awe of the dance; it had been so full of emotion.

"Did she choreograph that herself?"

"Uh, yeah, I think she did."

They watched as the dancers started to stream out the doors to meet waiting parents and grandparents with open arms. It wasn't until there were only a handful of people left waiting outside that they realized that Abby was taking longer than usual.

"I should go see if she's ok." Jane said the worry evident in his voice.

"Let me check on her Jane, I think I might know what's going on." Jane just nodded, settling onto a bench by the front of the theater to wait. Normally he would have insisted on coming with her, but tonight it just seemed right to let her go. Jane had been worried about Abby, and knowing that Lisbon cared enough about her to find her when she didn't have to made his heart just a little lighter.

Lisbon walked through the halls of the theater. She had stopped to check with one of the instructors and was told that Abby was indeed still in the dressing rooms and had been pointed in the right direction. There were really only two options that Lisbon could think of for why Abby hadn't come right out to find them. The first option she would have preferred, Abby sitting with friends laughing and talking about how much fun the whole evening had been. As much as she wanted this, she just didn't think it was going to happen.

No, the second option was much more possible. And that's what worried Lisbon. She got to the dressing room that the instructor had told her was used by the girls in Abby's troupe and knocked softly. Not hearing a response she cracked the door open slightly and the sight she saw nearly broke her heart. There curled up in a ball in the corner was Abby sobbing slightly.