I'm actually sad that this is almost over with like two chapters left :( I absolutely loved creating this for you guys and for me! It showed me that, by sharing something I love so much is the best thing for me. Writing has been my passion since I was young, but I never really shared it, and I'm glad I do now! You guys have been beyond amazing so infinite xoxoxo
Chapter 36 Calena's POV
It's my BIRFDAY! I's so excited 'cuz pawpaw an gammy is coming... AGAIN! I miss thems so much wen thems away. I knows daddy do too and Uncle Finny. Daddy's happy an I awesways wants daddy happy. He smiles mo' and daddy says dats cuz papa an me makes him, an I loves dat. But dis year is special cuz I gets to spend today with papa, nonna and nonno (papa teach me dat), an all my new aunties and uncles. Dat lots more peoples, an dey love me so dey hasta be there. I's sooper excited, bcuz daddy said at dis mini, holds up four fingers dat I can ride a bike. I not knows wat dat is, but I's excited. Now it time to wake daddy...
KBKBKBKBKBKBKBKB
Kurt's POV
I wake up to a squealing voice bouncing up and down on my bed. I crack an eye open just in time to see my birthday princess, moving up and down and yelling for me to wake up. I play along and pretend to still be sleep until she stops bouncing and forms a pout. Then, I grab her and hug her to my body which produces more squeals.
"What's up buttercup?" I say kissing her head of messy curls. Having her papa's hair is both a blessing and a curse.
"Daddy, wats today?" she asks throwing her infamous glare.
"Oh, I don't know. It's March 15th right? What could be happening today that's so important?" I say pretending to think about it.
"Daddy! It my birfday!" she says pouting up at me. I laugh at her adorableness and hug her tighter to me.
"I know princess. Happy birthday Lena!" I kiss her all over her face, making her giggle at my silliness.
"Pawpaw and gammy comin'?" her little face so full of hope.
"Yes baby, but Uncle Finny is going to get them today, so they should be here by this afternoon. In the meantime, what does my birthday lovebug want for breakfast?"
She pulls her 'thinky face' and smiles brightly up at me, "Pannycakes like Mickey!" I laugh at her antics.
"Sure thing, you wanna help daddy or watch cartoons until it's ready?"
"Catoons pls."
I set her up in my bedroom to watch television and then venture into the kitchen to start breakfast for myself, Lena, and Cedes if she's here. I can't believe that my baby is four years old today. I look back on the day I found out about her and how badly I wanted to tell Blaine. I talked to Blaine the next day and to hide something so big from him really torn me apart, but I thought I was doing the right thing.
"Hey beautiful! How is your day going?" he said as I tried my best not to cry at the sound of his voice.
"It's fine. How about yours?"
"Well, we are finally settled in for the most part. I really miss you though Kurt, I mean a lot," he says to where I can just picture The puppy dog eyes and adorable pout that I love so much.
"I really miss you too Blaine. Listen, I have something to tell you and it's really important," I start, really wanting to tell him because it's the right thing to do and he deserves to know.
"Is something wrong baby? You know you can tell me any-"
"Blaine. You have five minutes, dinner is almost ready," I hear a woman's voice on the other end of the phone.
"Okay, mom. So what did you need to tell me Kurt?" he turns his attention back to me. In that moment I made the hardest decision I ever had to make besides deciding to keep my child. I decided to let Blaine go, slowly until he could forgot about me, until he stopped loving me. I couldn't do this to him, tell him he's a teenaged father and potentially ruin his life.
"Oh just to tell you that I love you so much and I never want you to forget that okay Blaine? Never forget or doubt how much I love you," I say tears running down my face.
"I promise I won't. I love you too Kurt, so very much. I have to go, but I will talk to you later okay?"
I couldn't promise that he would because letting go of him was gonna be even harder than him letting go of me.
"Bye Blaine," I say instead.
"Bye babe." After that conversation, I avoided all forms of contact wanting to cave and answer every call, text, email, and skype chat, but he deserved to live his life without limitations.
Suddenly I feel arms circle around my waist, making me momentarily jump out of my skin before I realized it was the man himself.
"Kurt, honey where did you go just now?" he asked kissing the side of my neck. Instead of answering, I twirled around in his arms, tears evident on my face, and hug him tightly.
"I'm so very sorry Blaine."
"Whoa, hey why? What's going on baby?" he says placing kisses all over my face as a means of comfort, and it worked. I finally calm down enough to explain my emotional state.
"I pulled away four years ago because I wanted you to be happy and I thought forgetting about me would do just that. Do you remember our last actual conversation?" He nodded his head at the memory. "I found out the day before that I was pregnant and I seriously wanted to tell you. I was so close to telling you and then the moment never came back. After that I made the decision to let you forget me. I avoided long conversations, I sent short replies, until I just stopped responding all together. It wasn't really hard because though I'm sure you noticed your absent boyfriend, you were really busy with all of you school activities to really see me pulling away. I am extremely sorry for that Blaine because as much as I loved you then and even more now, I didn't want to be the thing to hold you back from your life," I say full on sobbing right now.
"Kurt baby, listen to me. I noticed, but I noticed a little too late. Back then, I was so busy keeping busy that I didn't realize I was losing the most important person in my life. If I had known then what I know now, I would have been on the first flight to Ohio with the quickness. We can't change what happened and I've learned that things happen for a reason. All I care about is the now and sharing the rest of my life with you by my side with our family, our friends, just being us. So no worries about would haves and could haves because I love my life right now with you and Calena in it. I don't wish for more or less than right now, so stop beating yourself up," he finishes tears on his own face now.
"I love you so much, I'm really glad you never stopped loving me," I smile at the love of my life.
"I love you too and so am I baby, so am I," we share a kiss before I feel little hands around my hips. We both look down to see the birthday girl hugging up both. Blaine picks her up, tosses her in the air, and then peppers her face with kisses.
"Hey Butterfly! What's today?"
"My birthday!"
"What's today?"
"My birthday!"
"Yay! Happy birthday baby!" he says hugging her close and giving more kisses. I could really tell that this moment was long overdue and I can't help but feel a little guilty that he missed the other three. But he's right, I can't keep beating myself up for something that happened all those years ago. Today, the present, is what matters and I am all for living it with so much hope for the future.
KBKBKBKBKBKBKBKB
Blaine's POV
The party we threw for our little girl is one of the best moments that I will remember forever. We did this, Kurt and I, as her parents threw her a party and celebrated this wonderful person that we made together. The feeling of watching her interact with family, her friends from class, and to see her face completely light up is the best gift I've ever gotten. By the time the party was coming to an end, with mostly, even though a few, family members left. Burt, Carole, Mom, Dad, Cedes, Finn, and Sam are still here while all the couples had date night, and Rachel was rehearsing for a new play she booked two months ago. We all sat around and talked while Calena played with her new toys. I find myself watching her for a few moments, before a thought came over me. I want another baby.
I look over to my fiance, and nudge him a little to get his attention.
"I want another one, Kurt," I say loud enough for his ears only. He scrunches up his face in confusion.
"Another what baby?"
"A baby," I say to which he response with silence, wide eyes, and jaw dropped. "I know that everything is happening so fast. But think about it, since the day I met you, I loved you. I knew that you were the one for me. I would never pressure you, but yes baby. I want another child with you. I want to be here from beginning to end, I want to experience every up and down to pregnancy, late night feedings, diapers, sickness, birthdays. I want to experience everything with you. You don't have to answer now, but I wanted you to know when you are ready, I am beyond ready." He sits there in silence and I just beam at him because of his mini adorable freak out at what I just said. "You have to say something, you know?" I chuckle at the situation.
"B-b-blaine? Are you s-sure? I mean it is a lot of responsibility. We're not even married yet, or living together. Are you really ready for all that and more?" he questions me, a smile seeping through his facade of worry.
"One million percent sure babe. With you, I am always and forever sure, never doubt that," I say pressing a chaste kiss one his lips. We separate and he gives a closed mouth smile before throwing himself in my arms.
"Yes, yes I want that so much. You have no idea. So yes, when the time is right, we will try for another baby," he says in my ear. I look up at the other occupants in the room, who looks confused as hell, but just shrugs it off like it's just a Kurt&Blaine thing.
"Why wait? We can have our own date night. Have your parents watch Lena, and rent a hotel room after a night of me wining and dinning you like no one's business and we celebrate. Thus, starting our very hard and difficult road to conception," I whisper wiggling my eyebrows at the end, which earned me an eyeroll.
"Okay, let's do it." We tune back into the conversation where we asked if Burt and Carole could handle Calena for the night, so Kurt and I could go on a date. They happily agreed and everyone got prepared to leave expressing their love and saying goodbye. Calena was excited for a sleepover with her pawpaw and gammy, so no complaint was made out of her. It was now 7 pm when I was re-knocking on Kurt's door to pick him up for our date. I was taking him to a French restaurant a little further than our usual frequent places. I wanted to be near the hotel and somewhere where it's just the two of us, with no interruptions. Tonight would be the first time I've made loved to anyone in four years. And that person was Kurt, and I couldn't be more proud of the fact that we are each other's first, last, and only.