Yes, I am alive! Don't worry my bestest friends! As you can see I am thinking of updating "Needle in a Haystack" this Spring Break so stay tuned! For now, enjoy this little sequel.
XOXOXO
CoffeyJoe
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One Man Army:
There are stories from around the continent of Vale. Stories of an army of ravishing young men who seek out brave, new frontiers ripe with adventure and strife. This company of the most handsome warriors the world has ever seen has been merely spoken about in hushed whispers across taverns nationwide. Their heroic deeds and altruistic endeavors have brought them much respect, and yet very little popularity. That is ok, these dauntless warriors need nothing more than the feeling of self-satisfaction from their quests. Although, living in an abandoned mall has grown somewhat dreary.
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The blonde DJ woke up with a start, nearly rolling off his reclining chair before he balanced himself. He brushed a somewhat grimy lock of flaxen hair out of his eyes before he pushed himself over to the security cams with a "wheee!". The young man started his daily routine by flipping through the cameras, across the once-desolate mall life had just begun to spring up.
His people were the early-bird/night owls and they had a big day ahead of him. Shops had begun to open once more (most advertising non-existent items) and the beginnings of folks emerged from under benches, behind once-potted plants, and even from other shops. Pressing a button on the intercom the fair-haired DJ cleared his throat once before beginning.
"Good morning lads! This is your favorite DJ Jaune on your favorite station: 93.9 Electrical Arc FM!" the men milling around the mall nodded and smiled, all just starting to work themselves into an enthusiastic attitude. "I have a few special announcements before the music so listen up you lovelies! First off, the food court just got a brand new item: Sweet and Sour Chicken! Go check that out at the Panda Nonstop. Then, of course, Sports n' Stuff has actually discovered some football pads in the back, needless to say if you're thinking of a new look go check it out. Finally, the movie theater just got a copy of Spruce Willis's new flick "Kick Gum and Chew Ass" it'll be airing tonight so order tickets in advance! That's all for now, so here's "Africa" by Toto!"
Jaune finished, shifting in his comfortable hoodie and cracking his neck. Across the mall the vintage song echoed, it had to be one of his favorites since they found the old mp3 and it certainly brought some life to their capital city: Green Pines Shopping Mall. Suddenly, and without warning, the door to his recording studio opened and in walked, if you could believe it, President Jaune in the flesh!
DJ Jaune could barely sputter a word before he got up and fixed his appearance hastily. Dammit, why didn't he go for a trim at the barber's? In the midst of his flailing the distinguished leader merely raised a hand with a smile, his neatly ironed white shirt and black coat looking beautiful. The President's blonde hair bounced slightly as he chuckled and deep blue eyes opened.
"It's alright son, just coming to pay a visit to our very own DJ." the boy nodded, causing Jaune to once again sputter in an attempt to muster up a thank you. "And, might I say, you are looking quite handsome."
This, the DJ was prepared for going back to one of their oldest pickup lines. "Well you don't look so bad yourself. Anyways, and if you don't mind me asking, what is the President of the United Confederacy of Jaune want with me?"
The leader of the UCJ walked over, his bodyguards waiting at the door, and, with a chuckle, patted his identical twin's back. "Son, I think what you do keeps our very society together. Tell me, when you look at these cameras what kind of people do you see?"
For reference, DJ Jaune looked blankly at one of the screens showcasing the bustling little city. Across the floor walked an army of identical clones, some conversing others trying on new clothing and some even running shops, as they went about their daily business. For the most part they were uniform in clothing and appearance with only a few sporting the latest fashion trends.
"I see... Jaunes... And... Shops...?" the blonde boy struggled to get out, not quite sure what the President wanted.
President Jaune chuckled once more, a habit that had basically won him the election. "No my boy, what I see out there is a civilization that is constantly fed important information by you and you alone. You are responsible for getting out the hot new news on the daily, and yet you never disappoint despite how the responsibility you have on your shoulders. I'd just like to say that the UCJ is proud to call you our DJ."
DJ Jaune blinked back some tears at the complimenting words of his leader, he sniffed to regain some face and nodded resolutely. "I understand sir, thank you for acknowledging the work I put into here. I am deeply thankful for both my job and my responsibility."
"Good man," President Jaune patted his double's back. "Now I'll leave you too it. Godspeed."
"Godspeed sir!" DJ Jaune saluted as his leader left.
President Jaune continued making his rounds around the city, greeting his clone's with a smile and wave. Sometimes it was easy to lose sight of how far their people had come, to think in just 9 months they had grown from a collection of identical homeless in the heart of Vale to this new kingdom in the works.
Occasionally, the President would see an armed soldier walking around, speaking into their walkie talkie to the outside troops. President Jaune frowned, as the original Jaune he had scoped out this place and had been one of the first to settle it. Green Pines Mall was situated near the back of Mountain Glenn and, thus, had an overwhelming population of small Grimm scattered around it. The fight to retake this little shopping mall alone costed him nearly 100, admittedly inexperienced, clones and a few of the surrounding buildings.
It was the main reason they didn't branch out into the rest of Mountain Glenn, the amount of soldiers alone made it entirely not worth it. He supposed he could just keep cloning himself and weapons until they cleared the whole place out, but the lives of his citizens were important to him and what sane leader would throw his people into the fire? No, for now they held the mall with unrivaled superiority and that was how things would stay until better plans were put together, for now-
"President Jaune! General Jaune requests you in the war room!" one Lt. Jaune saluted, standing at crisp attention.
"What for Lieutenant?" the President asked carefully, the last time he had been called was the breach.
"Apparently we've been sent a transmission from Beacon, sir. The General says it is urgent!" Lt. Jaune informed, still at salute.
"At ease, I'll be there immediately." The soldier dropped salute and guided the leader of the UCJ to the war room.
In truth, the war room was a large storage part of the mall that housed their best tech gadgets and weapons. In the center of the small warehouse, a table stood with a smattering of distinguished officers all speaking, behind them a large plasma screen TV projected the image of a silver-haired man sipping his coffee. As the President entered the soldiers saluted and were promptly put at ease as Jaune approached the TV.
"Can he see us?" The President asked, to which one of the tech crew nodded.
"Mr. Arc-" began Headmaster Ozpin of Beacon Academy.
"President Jaune." Jaune corrected sternly.
The Headmaster cleared his throat. "Excuse me, President Jaune, it is quite the honor to finally make contact with you. We saw your signal months ago but had trouble getting to it clearly."
"Apologies, had I'd known you wanted to make contact I would have helped on my end."
"Worry not," the professor waved the concern away. "I merely wished to ask you some questions in the interest of an alliance of sorts."
President Jaune raised a brow. "An Alliance? And why are you so eager to ally with me?"
"Oh, apologies Mr. President. I forgot to inform you that my people had been looking into your City-State and had been gathering information on how it ran. This was merely to make sure you hadn't been preparing for war against the kingdom of Vale I assure you." Headmaster Ozpin nodded his head.
"I see, you have no need to worry about my intentions Headmaster. I only seek to make a home for my people." The President stated, hands tucked behind his back.
The older man smiled and bowed his head. "A worthy and noble goal by all means. And to that end I wish to make an alliance with you, Mr. President I am aware of the nature of your semblance as well as the incredible opportunities it could grant to my people."
"And what, pray tell, is my semblance Headmaster?" President Jaune asked, for all he knew this guy could be bluffing.
"Duplication: A semblance that allows the user to duplicate anything they touch regardless of size or make up. These clones have the same durability and usability as the original and possess the same characteristics down to their aura and semblances." The headmaster recited as if off a textbook. He took a sip of his drink before speaking again. "Is that about the basics?"
"...Yeah, a few things missing but you got the gist of it." Jaune nodded tightly, it seemed the wizened headmaster knew his stuff.
"Surprised? I told you we had some scouts looking over you." Ozpin grinned before hiding it behind his mug. "But, moving on, the nature of this alliance would be a simple one of shared power."
"Shared power?"
Ozpin nodded. "Yes, it would seem your semblance has attracted the gaze of more than a few people. Some of which are allied with me, and others are more... unsavory. It is the interest of both preserving your people and strengthening the kingdom of Vale. The council wishes for me to establish a sort of peace between us and perhaps allow you entry into my academy."
"Your academy? Why would I need that?" Jaune asked, General Jaune behind him frowning. "I have my own city-state."
"I understand Mr. President, but this opportunity could help allow you network among the highest echelons of our government as well as help you hone new skills that you could use to strengthen your people." Ozpin explained, an unconcerned look on his face. "There's even some talk of perhaps allowing you to be annexed by Vale and act as your own recognized state."
"I see..." Jaune trailed off, with those kind of options he could really be on his way to making his own kingdom. And then, he could show those bastards that he was more than they-
"How could I contact you?" President Jaune asked, scratching his chin. "If I wish to partake in this alliance I mean."
"We'll keep this channel open for some time I assure you, you merely need to contact me again and I'll send a personal bullhead to come pick you up." Headmaster Ozpin waved a hand. "After that, it is merely a need to enroll you in our academy and let you spend the next couple years training. I advise you to take up my offer Mr. President, I am a man that could give you many options."
"I see, we'll have an answer for you very soon." Jaune nodded, the headmaster reciprocating it, before the channel closed.
"Mr. President! You can't be serious about joining this guy. We have no idea who he really is nor do we know his goals!" Colonel Jaune protested, one hand slamming the table.
"I understand Colonel, but the opportunities presented before us are near limitless if we can work this to our advantage." General Jaune countered, looking to his president. "While I do not trust that man, we would be fools to ignore the bounty set out before us."
"Yes, an awfully suspicious bounty if you ask me. This man claims to have been trying to contact us and also admits to spying on us before suddenly claiming he wishes to broker an alliance? This smells like a trap to me." one Lieutenant Colonel Jaune commented causing the rest of his cabinet to murmur amongst themselves.
"Aye, this seems too good to be true." Jaune, Head of Domestic Affairs, nodded. "Either way, we've been put into a tough spot."
"You forget that we needn't move our entire military or civilian population to complete this alliance. If we beef up security at Green Pines, then we could send a dignitary to Beacon to act as our ambassador." General Jaune argued, looking between the serious faces. "Perhaps we could even work out a deal for some better weapons and monthly food and water rations."
Again, another murmur around the table. Things had begun to get rather dreary at the mall, and fresh supplies were dwindling between the populace. The people of Green Pines could not scavenge forever lest they attract some of the nastier beasts in Mountain Glenn or run out of salvageable things. It was a concern a long time coming, and the timing of Headmaster Ozpin couldn't have been more suspicious. The whole situation worried the young leader, a hand scratching a non-existent beard as his officers argued over the whole thing.
"Mr. President, what do you think?" one of the identical clones asked, the whole room going silent.
"I think we should take him up on this offer." another argument began to brew but was cut off by the blonde. "We have very little choice, we've known about this food shortage for months now and yet we haven't come up with a single good solution. At this point in time, our best bet is to ally with Ozpin in return for monthly supplies and perhaps some political power. If nothing else, this experience will serve to put us on a PR blast. Tell Jaune that I want him to cook up the best paraphernalia he can muster for this."
One of the officers nodded and left, leaving the others to quietly talk among themselves.
"Who should we send?" one of the Jaunes asked.
"I am going, alone as well." President Jaune answered, silencing the flood of comments with a hand. "As leader it is my duty to go there myself, and, as we have no others trained for such an endeavor, it is only natural I go. Should I perish for one reason or another, Vice President Jaune will assume my role, and for the duration of my leave he will assume role as acting President."
The war room was silent, even the tech managers had gone quiet in the face of the announcement. Some of the officers sat down, General Jaune meeting his longtime leader's eyes with a silent question. Both President Jaune and General Jaune had been together since their stint under the bridge back in Vale, and the two had been inseparable as well as vital to the retaking of the mall.
"Are you sure about this Jaune? What if you don't come back?" the army-green clad Jaune asked.
"Then, my old friend, it will for a worthy cause: Our People." President Jaune answered confidently, the two stared eachother down before the distinguished general sighed.
"You're crazy you know that?" General Jaune asked, a ghost of a smile grazing his lips.
"Well, that might be exactly what we need." the president answered, fixing his tie. "Jaune?"
One of the tech managers stood up. "Y-Yes sir?"
"Send a message to Ozpin, I'm going to Beacon..."
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"Mr-" Headmaster Ozpin started before clearing his throat and correcting himself. "President Jaune, glad to finally make your acquaintance."
"I as well Headmaster." Jaune shook his hand as the gray professor stepped out from behind his desk. "I must admit, Beacon is truly remarkable."
"Yes, I find that one never gets too tired of it." Ozpin commented somewhat distantly before turning back to his guest. "I trust the bullhead ride over was without major issue?"
"Yes, well, I have a bad case of motion sickness you see. The ride was... less than pleasant." Jaune chuckled with the headmaster. "And you can call me Jaune during my stay at Beacon, sir. I am your new student."
"For that I am grateful, I think you will be most happy with your life here. The school's initiation begins tomorrow, so please, try and get some rest. I trust your accommodations, weapons, and whatever armor have been appropriately moved?" the silver haired man asked.
"Yes sir, they were all moved with issue." Jaune nodded with a smile. "I took a small tour of the campus so I'll at least know where I'm going."
"Wonderful, I hope this will be a pleasant experience for you Jaune."
"Me too headmaster, me too..."
The next day...
Well, waking up wasn't a pleasant experience. Even after becoming president Jaune had never truly gotten used to waking up so early in the morning, ironic because he was an avid night owl. Jaune quickly set out to begin his day, a flurry of identical clones seemingly splitting off of his body and going to collect clothes, ids, bags, and the like as the real Jaune walked to and fro in a haze.
After a quick shower and a fresh change of clothes, Jaune went downstairs from his guest room to find the Beacon grounds bustling with the new students. It seemed he had woken up just in time for orientation, the thought almost made him scoff. Who in their right mind would hold an orientation at 12:30 in the afternoon? Had these people ever heard of sleep?
Shaking his head, Jaune followed the procession of younger students that formed into a massive stream towards the grand hall of Beacon. Along the way the young leader took note of a few students, the ginger boy in silver armor, the blonde-haired girl waltzing around with a group of people, and a suspicious black-cloaked figure scuttling away from the rest. Jaune narrowed his eyes, that may have warranted some suspicion but he was sure Ozpin could handle it if they weren't supposed to be here.
Suddenly, there was a sound of splintering rock and a massive plume of smoke rose into the air. From a nearby offshoot of the main path Jaune could hear an exasperated voice chastising someone from beyond the hedges. Whoever they were they seemed pretty steamed at the not-so-lucky victim, whatever the matter it seemed only right that, as a distinguished ambassador, he would play mediator.
Following the sounds of chaos, Jaune came upon a pair of young women in the middle of a slew of white cases. The taller one, who had the most startling white hair, seemed bent over and ruthlessly scolding the much younger redhead on the ground. The white-haired girl shook a seemingly cracked vial of red dust that must've been the cause of the small explosion.
Ah, now it makes sense. Jaune thought to himself, the redhead must've accidentally set off the dust and earned quite the tongue lashing. Jaune briskly walked up to the two and cleared his throat, drawing the rather scathing attention of the white-haired girl.
"Oh great, more of you ruffians. What is it?" she spoke like a noblewoman would to a commoner.
"I heard that there was a small disagreement over here, and I came to help resolve it." Jaune mustered up the most pleasant poker face he could.
"Well, no one asked you to butt-" the white-haired girl was cut off by the redhead.
"Oh thank you! You have to believe me it what an accident! She was shaking the dust and I sneezed and..." the girl trailed off, a sheepish blush on her face.
White-haired girl scoffed. "Whatever the reasons, you not only damaged Schnee property but could have blown us up!"
"I said I was sorry princess." the redhead murmured.
"Well, I think that this could be resolved-" Jaune found himself cut short.
"Princess? I am Weiss Schnee, heiress of the Schnee Dust Company and I will not-"
"Please! Let's be civil." Jaune interrupted, earning a withering look from Weiss. "Now, tell me your name please ma'am."
"R-Ruby Rose, at your service." Ruby nodded. "And who are you?"
"Yes, who are you?" Weiss asked.
"I am President Jaune of the United Confederacy of Jaune, a sovereign state currently on the outskirts of Mountain Glenn." Jaune answered as regally as he could.
"Y-You're what?" Weiss asked in disbelief, arms folded across her chest. "The United Confederacy of Jaune? Sounds made up..."
"It is not!" Jaune snapped with more ferocity than needed. Seeing their looks, he cleared his throat. "I mean, it is a small nation as of now. A mere couple hundred."
"That's awesome! Can you believe we're talking to the president of a whole country?!" Ruby crowed, Weiss scoffing.
"It's more of a province than anything." Jaune chuckled nervously. "A-Anyways are we done here? I feel as though the situation has been resolved."
"Fine." was all Weiss said.
"It's good with me!" Ruby chirped. "Now come on, we're going to be late!"
Ruby grabbed Jaune's hand and pulled him away back towards the main hall, Jaune nary having the time to voice his opinion. Left alone, all Weiss could do was sit in silence for a moment before scoffing and going to collect her luggage again.
"Commoners, I swear..."