Chapter 36: Final resort

"Excuse me! Um. Where is the lady who fell from the sky's room located?" Shinpachi asked hurriedly the nurses assigned in the help desk.

Gintoki together with the duo plus Otae came to confirm the lady who were the center of the talk today. After hearing the room's number, they quickly dashed out of the help desk. Despite of being drenched to the rain, they didn't care. Now that they have a lead about the missing Yorozuya member they'll grab this chance.

"Here it is! It's Room 356!" Shinpachi informed the others.

Kagura swiftly opened the door of the room and saw none other than her cherished motherly-figure lady. The three other people followed as well and saw this moment.

Satsuki with a bandage on her forehead, staring in the window with melancholy. For a split second, she reverted her attention to the people in the door of her room. Her eyes enlarged with the scene. Seeing them made her long for them but remembering what the effect will cause their reunion made her frown.

On the other hand, Kagura immediately jump to the woman's chest; hugging her. They told that she really did die but it looked like she did survive. The other members went inside and crowded up the young lad except Gintoki.

"Satsuki-san, we really thought you're dead." Shinpachi sobered up in tears as well as Otae.

Satsuki can't manage to bring up a reply. She was delighted but at the same time wistful. She can't express her feelings right now.

"Satsuki-chan, we missed you so much!" Kagura exclaimed her delight while hugging her in tears.

She too wanted to hug back but she can't. If she did, the warmth of this group will let her remind it again. Now that she decided to not appear in front of them but fate brought her back to them.

"What are you doing there, Gin-san? Come and greet Satsuki-san." Otae invited him over.

He manages to pull out a relieved smile and left the scene. It made the brunette girl surprised though since it was him yearned for her the most and yet he didn't greet her at all.

Gintoki sat in the bench outside of the room as he covered up his face. He was relieved that she was alive. He was really delighted that he does want to hug her.

"I'm glad… she's back…" He mumbled. Tears fell from his eyes and he tried to wipe it off.

But remembering what he did in the past made him not to do it. He did a wrong thing to her and he was contemplating about it. However, he knew it already. Satsuki just won't go home with them unless he is here with them.

Shinpachi left the room and saw Gintoki in the bench; covering his self. The glasses man knew that Gintoki felt responsible with it and he doesn't want to show himself in front of her. He sat next to him and called him, "Gin-san… It must be nice, isn't it?"

"I know. Get back to the room with the flat-board already. Hug her as much as you want." Gintoki said still hiding under his hands.

"Kagura-chan can go first. She did miss her so much; I can go later. Gin-san, I'm sorry I can't do anything right now. But all I can say is this, Satsuki-san… Satsuki-san's decision to leave the Yorozuya wasn't because of you." Shinpachi started. Silence encored the hallway as he continued, "She have a reason to leave. I know. Since she isn't that type of person, she'll forgive you I know."

"I don't know anymore. I don't know how to bring her back to the Yorozuya. The usual 'me' won't be forcing her to be back but this time it's different. I know about that. I know that she do have another reason to leave but I can't forget how genuine that tears she cried on." Gintoki expressed in a downhearted tone.

"Satsuki-san really treasured us. You know what, back then when Satsuki-san and I got lock up in the Kihetai's ship. She sacrificed herself for me to not get harmed. Even if she was buried with bruises… She fought… And when she got locked in a room… She told me to go and leave her for the sake of not encountering Vendetta… I'm really… thankful to have her as an older… sister…" Shinpachi couldn't stop his tears from flowing down.

Gintoki sits up straight, removing his hands from his face. He replied him, "Why the hell are you crying? I'm the one who wanted to cry the most. You have seen her and converse to. But I can't afford to see her nor converse to. Stop crying, idiot."

He pat his shoulder; trying to calm him down. Then, he continued to speak out, "Satsuki… was that kind of person, huh? She really didn't fail to surprise me. Pattsuan, let's do our best to bring her back, okay?"

"Yes."

Days passed since they found out that Satsuki is alive and kicking. Every day, the duo visited her to bring her food to eat. Even though, they normally converse to her. She didn't utter a single word back to them. The duo already knew Satsuki's reason for being like that. Instead, they tried to cheer her up.

"Satsuki-chan, didn't you miss us?" Kagura began to ask her. But all she got is silence in return.

"Satsuki-chan, why didn't you reply in return, yes?"

No replies.

"I'll come back later, yes? Eat food, you need vitamins!" Kagura reminded her and went off the room.

Satsuki knew it. The moment she returns their replies and actions; she won't be able to leave them. The room was very silent as she tightened her grip to her knuckles. She missed them but she can't.

"It hurts…"

Right after that moment, Toushiro entered the scene while panting vigorously. Satsuki was shocked to this scene; she also began to tear-up when seeing her long time childhood friend. He hurriedly approached the lady. However, he was surprised when Satsuki immediately locked her arm around him.

"S-Satsuki?!"

Tears began ooze out of her eyes at the same time tightening her lock to his. On his part, he was also subdued by seeing her again. For a minute, they stayed like this as he tried to comfort her down.

Satsuki retreated her arms around his as she wiped her tears off and recollected her thoughts. Toushiro set a chair beside hers; he sat onto it while looking at her.

"Toushiro, sorry I made you worried." Satsuki let out a soft smile on her lips trying reassure him that she was safe.

"What happened, Satsuki?"

He was the only one who she can spilt the beans to him. Exhaling thoroughly, she began her story including the time when she time-travelled and how she got back here.

"So that's what happened, huh? Satsuki… I've heard that you're not talking to the other people including the Yorozuya? Why?" He asked.

A frown quiver to her lips. It hurt her not to talk to them though they she miss them the most. Sighing, she answered his question earnestly, "I'm… I'm going to leave the Yorozuya. I have to. You know Shiro right? The one that I met in a dark guild a few years ago. He'll be coming. I do not want them to get involve with my own problems. I'm telling you this Toushiro because you're the only one who knew about my current situation."

She paused for a while and proceeded, "Maybe if I get attached to them again… I won't be able to leave them… That's why… I have to clear it to them…"

"You went missing for weeks Satsuki. Some say you're dead or missing but I never believe in those things though. You see, when I heard about that I immediately beat out the hell of that Yorozuya bastard but he didn't fight back..." He paused for a moment from giving his explanation to her. When explaining this situation to her, he can't help but remember the thing that happened to them.

Flashback.

The doorbell rang continuously around the Yorozuya compound. It didn't stop at all; it seems that the person behind that door didn't give a damn if the doorbell will get broken. Shinpachi hurriedly went to open the door only to find out the Vice Commander outside. As soon as the door opened, he swiftly marched inside and headed to where Gintoki is.

"Bastard, what did you do to Satsuki?!" He was agitated when he said it and planted a punch to his face. Gintoki flew across the room. The glasses man was alarmed when seeing the two of them fighting so he decided to put an end in this.

"H-Hijikata-san, I know you are also depressed with what happened to Satsuki-san but violence won't solve anything!" Shinpachi scowled.

But Toushiro shove him off, "Shut up! I'm not talking to you; I'm talking to this bastard!" He marched over Gintoki and planted another fist to his features.

"Spit it out! I'm so wrong for leaving Satsuki in your hands! Where the heck is she?!" Toushiro bawled at him. He planted his fist for the umpteenth time but he didn't answer at all.

Shinpachi finally locked his arms to his trying to stop him from injuring Gintoki. Toushiro was really frustrated to this matter at all. He tried to shove him over his arms but he kept in touch as well.

"Like hell I know where Satsuki is." Gintoki gave out an answer. He avoided having a contact with the two since he doesn't want to see them at all. Blood kept on dripping to his nose and several bruises were present in his features. But he didn't bother to stand nor fight back.

"You're right that you should not have entrusted her to me. You should have taken her away from me. I couldn't even protect her. I was the one she entrusted to but I… failed. I am a sore loser." Gintoki explained bitterly.

Toushiro's eyebrows furrowed to his statement. He didn't know this guy.

"If you want to beat me, go ahead. I'm not going to fight at all since it's entirely my fault. But I tell you this, Satsuki… Satsuki isn't dead. I know it."

Hearing his story made her sober up for a while again. She bit her lip for some reasons, "After all of what happened, he still… he still trusted me… He knew I didn't die... "

Toushiro could only offer is a pat to her back trying to calm her down.

Today, the Yorozuya except Gintoki is here again to pay her a visit. But no matter how much they tried to talk to her nothing changes at all. She didn't reply to every single thing that was being ask to her. The duo certainly wanted to try to bring her back to the Yorozuya.

Shinpachi couldn't take this anymore he wanted to talk to her again. So he placed a chair next to her and sat on it.

"Satsuki-san, why aren't you talking? You're always staring on the window or in the wall for no reason." He started a conversation but all he got from her is silence in return.

"Satsuki-san, we are lonely without you. We missed you so much. Can't you just talk to us for a minute? I'm sorry for pestering you so much. Why do you want to leave the Yorozuya?" He asked her again but she didn't reply at all.

Kagura head over her and tried to say something as well, "Satsuki-chan, I-I… Please… Stop this already, uh-huh."

"Satsuki-san, please come back to the Yorozuya!" Shinpachi bowed for a moment.

"Satsuki-chan, please talk!" She shouted to her with all her might.

"I won't come back!" Satsuki also shouted back. It made the two horrified to her answer.

"You said that I need to talk right? Now, I'm telling you this. I… I will leave the Yorozuya that's final already! Stop the ruckus already!" Satsuki for once was frustrated over them. Tightening her grip to the mattress, she continued, "Will you… Will you just leave me alone?! Stop with the family vibe thing already! I'm cutting my connections with you… That's why, never visit me again. I do not want to see you guys anymore."

The duo was absolutely shocked about her statement. They were broken. They didn't know what to respond at that moment. That time, they knew Satsuki doesn't want to get connected with them again.

"Sorry." Shinpachi uttered those words and leave the room with Kagura. Somehow the duo was depressed to the words Satsuki just stated to them. On the other hand, Satsuki couldn't help but hit her bed countlessly while biting her lip.

"Sorry. Sorry. Sorry, Kagura… Shinpachi."

It was evening already. The stillness of the room was maintained since Kagura and Shinpachi didn't came back. It was really lonely for her. In order to protect them, she should cut her relationships between them.

It was utterly quiet when someone entered her room. Seeing this made her surprise for some reasons, it was Gintoki who visited her in the middle of the night. Apparently, this will be his first visitation coming from him since he didn't go with Kagura and Shinpachi when they visited her.

"Yo. Good evening." He greeted.

Gintoki brought chocolates with him as he slowly closes the door. Noticing his gifts, Satsuki thought that he really didn't change after not seeing him. He put the chocolates on the table beside her bed and sat on a chair.

"How's your condition?" He asked.

"I'm fine now." She replied.

Surprisingly, she replied to him. Gintoki, himself, couldn't hide his shock to this scene. He thought that he'll be talking to the air but he guesses that won't be it.

"Kagura, shouted at me in anger. In accordance with that I'll be replying your questions so that I can settle this." Satsuki explained while playing at her fingers.

"You scolded them a while ago though." He responded while he grabs a chocolate bar from his gift and ate it, "Satsuki… If you're going to leave the Yorozuya, you should pass over me first. Afterall, I'm the head of the Yorozuya, get it?"

She nodded. It really was awkward between the two of them. This wasn't usual conversation between the two of them. In a normal situation, they should be shouting and insulting each other.

"Wah, this is good." He complimented the food he brought.

"Gintoki… You didn't just come here to visit me, wasn't it? Spit it out already!" Satsuki retorted already. The thing is that she knew Gintoki already and a little bit of his past self that's why she doesn't want to go round to his reasons.

"What? You already knew that, right?" He taunted her right of the bat; closing their distances with each other.

Satsuki stared back towards his crimson colored eyes. Finally, she is in the final boss; she just has to try not to be carried away too much with his façade.

"I'm telling you this… I'm not permitting you to leave the Yorozuya." Gintoki revealed his true intentions to her already.

Satsuki instantly shove him away from her as she gave out a fierce look to him, "I will tell you this again… I will be leaving—"

He swiftly covered her mouth with his hand and interrupted her, "Nor will I let you say those words."

Again, she jolted herself and pushed him away. This just too bad for her since she might get carried away. Her resolution will be fine and that is leaving the Yorozuya for their sake. She won't top her selfish self again and abandon her family's condition.

"Why do you want to leave the Yorozuya?" He asked.

"I do not want to be with a person who compares me to my alter ego." She shot back without any hesitations. Although, this wasn't the real reason behind her condition but all she can do is to tell him this.

Gintoki let out a slight frown to her, "You know Satsuki, I'm sorry… I'm sorry for being an idiot. I didn't intend to hurt you just like that but I know that's not your reason behind that."

This made Satsuki panic for a while. Gintoki really is the last boss for this stage and it was hard for her to let her go.

"If you got a problem, say it! What's bothering you?! If you aren't going to tell us anything, how the hell are we supposed to know or sort out of it?!" Gintoki added.

"I told you right? Don't act too friendly to me. I joined the Yorozuya for the money and not for the bond. If you can't give me money, then I have to leave." Satsuki began to explain more, leaving the true reason out.

"Hey, tell me the real reason! You're not a money person at all! This isn't like you!"

She clicked her tongue, "Oh shut up! What do you know about me?! I don't want to have to do with you anymore! I don't want to talk with you nor be with you! You and I are just total stranger, right?!"

Despite all this speculations, Gintoki remained silent and still while listening to her blabbering.

She then continued, "There was never between you and me. I never once enjoyed hanging out with you. We haven't gotten any closer and all my memories with you. They're complete fake, all of them." This is the complete opposite of her feelings. She did enjoy and love them as a family but all she can do now is to throw the exact opposite of it. Her statement made her sad as well. Tears was about to form in her eyes but she tried to shove it off or else her cover will be exposed.

"That's why… Let me leave the Yo—"

The impact of the smashed table flew randomly across the room as she saw Gintoki planted a punch to it. The gifts that are placed there were fallen to the ground. This made her shocked since he really was agitated about this.

"I also told you right… I won't let you tell me that statement. And quit faking it already, flat board woman!" Gintoki clutch over her wrist and pull it up revealing Satsuki's tears flowing from her eyes, "Is this the face of a person who wanted to leave the Yorozuya?"

"Stop it!" Satsuki shoved him really hard then yelped back, "I don't want to lose anything anymore…or anyone! Outsiders doesn't have to do with this. This is my final resort…"

"I will leave the Yorozuya!"

Author's Note:

Thank you for the support!