Chapter 36:

I had reached the house when the wind changed direction again and I was hit with the most incredible smell I had ever experienced. As a human I thought Edward's smell was amazing, but that was nothing compared to this. It was a glorious odor, so powerful I felt it envelop all my senses. The smell was coming from the woods, and I had to go to it. I ran faster than I thought possible, flying across the ground. I had never felt a yearning this strong in my life… it was the smell of pure desire. The smell of human blood.

I ran into the woods as fast as my vampire feet could carry me. The smell of human blood was the most incredible scent I had ever experienced. As the wind changed direction it got weaker and stronger, but it didn't matter, I had already honed in on my target and was salivating at the thought of tasting it.

Why had I denied myself this pleasure for so long? Just thinking about this wonderful blood going down my throat was far better than sex. Every instinct in my body yearned to devour the human who was less than 100 feet away.

I adjusted my pattern slightly so I could get there quicker. The burning in the back of my throat was the most powerful sensation I had ever felt.

I burst through the trees and saw my prey directly ahead of me. The venom started to flow into my mouth, the taste was strangely sweet, as if the fluid was alive and anticipating the moment when it would co-mingle with the human's blood. Bliss was milliseconds away. Like a cobra I opened my mouth ready to strike.

That's when I heard two words. "Aunty Bella?"

I tried to hold up but the blood was too alluring. I knew it was my godson standing there but I didn't care. The struggle in my body was intense; I felt my soul splitting in two as I fought the overwhelming desire to strike the human I most loved in the world.

The world went into slow motion. I felt my body recoil as I fought to resist the siren call of my most base desire.

With every ounce of energy left in my being, I struggled against the urge to become the monster that lived inside me. I saw Sam Jr.'s eye's and in them I saw all the years of love I had known for him and from him, it was enough, just barely enough, to give me the strength to resist at least for a moment.

As I started to pull myself away I was hit harder than I had ever been in my life, struck by a force so strong I sailed close to a hundred feet in the air. But not before I saw the look of terror on Sam Jr.'s face.

I landed with a thud and smashed a tree in two. I looked up to see Edward running next to me. As soon as I hit the ground he scooped me up and ran.

"Edward, Sam…"

"He's safe now, you need to hunt…"

"No, he's terrified, I need to go to him…"

"He'll be okay, you didn't bite him, just scared him a bit." Edward said trying to comfort me.

"I know I didn't bite him, I stopped myself, I couldn't hurt him, I don't know how I stopped but I did…"

"That would explain the odd look on your face when I got there, it reminded me of the look on your face the day I found in you Port Angeles."

"I need to go back to him…" I cried struggling against Edward's firm grasp.

"Not until you have eaten," Edward said defiantly refusing to release me.

"But he needs me…"

"Bella please, there is a herd of deer around the bend, just eat and you will feel much better."

"No!" I screamed. The sound bounced off the trees and the forest and echoed everywhere.

Edward never stopped running he just held me tighter and kissed my forehead and told me he loved me over and over again. When I smelled the deer I struggled a little more. I didn't want to eat, I wanted to go to Sam Jr. I wasn't sure why I felt this need, and it scared me. What if I couldn't resist this time?

The deer must have sensed our presence because they started to flee as we got close. Edward was fast, but carrying me was slowing us down and the deer had a nice head start. Never mind the fact that I was still fighting to get back to Sam Jr., to console or devour him I didn't know.

Up ahead one of the deer stumbled, and that was all the time Edward needed. We were on top of the animal before it could get up. Edward tore a gash in his neck and as soon as the smell of its blood hit my nose I felt the desire to nourish my body with it. I sucked the deer dry as Edward captured another deer and brought it to me.

He was right, I was much hungrier than I thought. Usually one deer would have been enough for me, but I had four before I felt full.

The burning sensation in my throat quelled and my senses came back to me. The horror of what I had almost done hit me harder than Edward had earlier. I curled up in a ball on the ground, holding my knees with my arms and begged Edward to kill me.