When the film credits rolled Bucky decided to break the silence that had stretched between him and Melody. Though the movie had been rather entertaining, something a bit heavier was weighing on his mind and now that the film was over it was even more pressing.

"Melody?"

The doctor didn't move from her spot-the crook of Bucky's arm. "Yeah?"

"Today is your birthday." He'd gotten that much from the conversation she had Sharon had gone over earlier that morning. Sharon had wanted to celebrate the day and Melody had shot down the idea.

"Yeah it is," her voice was softer than it had been before. Not as relaxed and at ease. "Why?"

"You don't want to celebrate it."

Melody sighed and rested her head against Bucky's chest. Closing her eyes she took another deep breath. "It's not that. At least not that exactly."

He let his fingers trail over her arm absentmindedly. "Then what is it? Why don't you celebrate your birthday?" He had thought she would want to-she had to fight for each one. In her house, she'd been lucky to stay alive, she'd had to fight for every year she saw right up until her father's death. Bucky thought that was plenty of reason to celebrate every year-she'd beat the odds. She'd made it out alive.

"I've never celebrated my birthday before." Melody explained, words coming out slowly. "And I'm afraid if someone tries to give a gift or throw me a party I'll start crying. Don't really want to explain that so I just don't do anything when it rolls around."

Bucky held Melody a little tighter for a moment. "That's awful."

"I wouldn't cry because I was sad, I'd cry because I was happy."

"Then why not risk it? If anyone asks you could just say it's been a long time since you've done something like that. Blame it on your mother and her reaction to the death of her husband. People would believe that."

"I tell enough lies about John and Moria as it is," Melody replied. "Rather not tack on anymore than I have to. Too many stories to keep straight-I'd slip up."

"You don't know that."

"I don't," she conceded. "But I won't take the risk. If anything got out, if anyone tried to send me to a shrink for evaluation I don't know that I'd pass. They'd question whether or not I was in a fit state of mind to work and they'd start to dig. If they knew what I did, what I can do...They'd take away my license faster than I could say 'Code Blue'."

Bucky was silent for a moment. Finally, he mustered a response. "Your career is that important to you?"

Melody nodded. "It's not just my career."

"It's your life," Bucky finished. "I figured."

"No," she said. "It's not my life."

"No?"

"No."

"Then what is it?"

"It's redemption." That hadn't been what Bucky was expecting to hear. Passion, maybe, ambition, but not redemption. It wasn't at all the word that came to mind when he thought of Melody's surgical career.

Melody sat more upright so they were looking at each other. A half-smile was playing on her face. "You look confused."

"Because I am."

She laughed then. "I did something horrible. No matter the circumstances," she added hastily, as Bucky opened his mouth to argue. "I turned off my empathy and emotion and murdered a man while he slept. So I decided if I had to have that, if that was part of me and I couldn't get rid of it, I was going to use it for different outcomes. It's why I became a surgeon. Now, when I do that, I'm not killing someone. I'm trying to save their lives."

"But you said earlier, you didn't feel human after last night, after the train and all that."

Melody shrugged. "It's draining sometimes, flipping the switch between being a person and being a robot. It makes me feel like a freak. How I'll go from feeling nothing at all and then have everything come crashing back the moment things are over."

"You're not a freak. You're amazing," Bucky reached for her hand cradled it with his own. "You save lives. And you could have gone the other way. You could have used that switch for cruelty but you didn't. You turned it into something you could use to benefit others. You're extraordinary for sure, but not a freak." He let his fingers curl around hers and acting on instinct rather than rational, Bucky drew her hand towards him and placed it on his chest, right over his heart. "You saved my life too. Just thought you should know."

Melody's dark green eyes widened. "What?"

"I don't know what would have happened to me if I hadn't met you." He said, feeling a weak smile come to his face as he fought back embarrassment. "The things you taught me, how to help cope with the memories and make the bad days easier-I couldn't have figured that out alone. I didn't know that at first, but now I do. So, in short, you saved my life."

He loosened his grip, ready to let her go, but Melody held fast to his hand. Looking at their entwined fingers she spoke up. "Why did you kiss me last night?"

"You kissed me."

"That's not the kiss I'm talking about."

Bucky's heart skipped a beat and heat flashed through his body as he remembered what he'd done. He could feel the memory of the warm, scarred skin against his lips just thinking about it. "Oh you mean..."

"Yeah, that one."

Bucky felt his face grow warm and he found himself unable to look directly at her anymore. Instead, he followed her lead, opting to stare at their hands. One flesh and one metal, one skilled at saving lives and one skilled at taking lives, so different and yet they still fit together.

"I kissed you because I did not have the ability to hear you say you were ugly anymore. And I didn't think you'd just listen to what I said because you never do. I don't blame you for that," he added hastily. "I know how hard it is to undo years of conditioning."

"I bet you would," she agreed. "I'm sorry."

"Not your fault."

"My past isn't your fault either."

Bucky looked up at Melody again. "I know that, but it doesn't change how I feel." He reached out, brushing a strand of hair so he could see her face. "It doesn't change the fact that what happened to you should never have happened at all. To you or anyone."

"I can say the exact same thing to you." Melody said, lifting her face to look at him. "What happened to you," she tapped her fingers against the metal of his hand. "I can't imagine why anyone would do that to another person. I've tried to imagine what was going through their heads, why any doctor could or would do what they did to you, but I can't."

A tear slipped down her face and quickly she wiped it away, an embarrassed grin coming to her face. "Don't cry," Bucky said. "Not for me."

"I'm sorry," she wiped at her eyes again.

"Don't apologize either, you didn't do anything wrong."

"I'm supposed to be a little more composed," she explained. "Part of the job."

"So you're a doctor right now?"

"No."

"Then who are you?"

"I'm just Melody," she said. "And Melody's a little more emotional than Doctor Frasier." She wiped at her eyes for a third time. "And I don't really know how to be her. I guess that sounds crazy, sorry."

"No," Bucky said. "It doesn't. I know exactly what that's like. I feel like that every day. I'm not the Winter Solider anymore, but I'm not the man I was before either and now I'm trying to figure out who this new person is."

Melody smiled at him. "Well, for whatever it's worth I...I think this new person is a good man." She shifted closer to him, eyes shining and a smile on her face. "I'm glad that I know him. I'm glad he came through my front door."

"Even if he was an ass when you first met?"

"Yeah, even then. I'm still glad that I," her voice trailed off and she was even closer, her face close enough that Bucky could see the freckles on her nose. "I," she tried again, but she seemed to be at a loss for words. Bucky felt her free hand sweep across his face, warm fingers light against his skin and sending warmth through his body.

She tucked some of his over-long hair behind his ear and her hand curled around his face. Her eyes closed and this time, Bucky wasn't surprised when he felt her lips touch his.

Thanks for reading! :)