A/N: I can not apologize enough to you, my readers for this delay as out of my hands as it has been. Every story, every idea that I have ever written, or typed in this case was stolen from me. My computer was stolen along with my USB that held everything that had written since I was a child. I was devastated, and still am. It took me a long time to want to even write again but I just couldn't let this story go. I promised that I would finish this one and so I got back to work. It is not perfect but it is as close to the orginal as I coudd get it. I am still not completely back, I'm still horrified that every thing is gone but I hope that one day you will get to read another story from me. For now I will work on ending this story as I planned and hopefully it will be in a timely manner. Thanks you guys for not counting me out just yet. Enjoy!
PS: I would perhaps re-read the last chapter since it's been awhile.
Chapter Thirty-Four
***Earlier***
BPOV
"Alice," I called. I glanced around for the small women. Where did she go? I thought. I left her here while I went to the restroom and she promised to wait for me until I came back.
I would have text her but I didn't have my cell phone on me so instead I leaned against the bar watching a sea of people move back and forth to the music. If she wouldn't wait for me I figured I'd wait for her. Standing alone I felt myself begin to move but I stopped myself as soon as I realized what I was doing. Rhythm and coordination went hand and hand, neither of which I was blessed with.
"Just let the music take over… and the alcohol," Alice had said and even though I still hadn't found myself on the dance floor I enjoyed the music; each beat a tempting plea urging me to move my body. I frowned when I once again found myself trapped by its lure.
I felt someone tap my shoulder and I turned to the bartender that Alice had introduced to me earlier. Earl, I think his name was. An old name for such a young guy, he was only twenty-six but the name fit him.
"Are you looking for Alice?" He leaned in so I could hear him. I nodded. "Yeah, she told me she'd wait here for me,"
"She said something came up, but I think she's up there," He pointed to the highest level that looked over the dance floor, the V.I.P area.
"Thanks Earl," I smiled before he placed a glass in front of me. I gazed up at him, confused. I hadn't ordered anything. I had already had two shots with Alice and a Sex Bomb. That was more than enough as could already feel the tingling though out my body. Maybe that was why it was so hard to not move to the music.
Earl grinned. "From an admirer," then he pointed to a guy dressed in a dark shirt on the far end of the bar. The man smiled at me, and I could not help but stare back dumbfounded. I almost wanted to turn around to see if he was actually looking at me and not past me. I felt my face turn hot when I realized that he was really looking at me. I'd never had a guy buy me drink and most definitely not in this manner. I was about return his smile, when Kate and Angela came bouncing over to me. They had left us earlier to check out the roof.
"Bella," I turned to them drink in hand. "The roof is amazing, I cannot beli..."
I glanced back to where the guy had been, but he wasn't there. I searched the area briefly, stretching my neck to glance above the crowd but he was gone. Odd, I thought. He was just there.
Angela touched my arm. "Who are you looking for?" She turned to where I was looking.
"Huh?" I bowed back to her; I hadn't heard her entire question over the music.
"Where's Alice," Kate pointed out. I sighed and shrugged.
"Not sure but she may be up there," I pointed to where Earl had previously. I watched as her eyes lit up. "Then what are we waiting for," She grabbed my arm and pulled me along. I was moving through the throngs of people behind Kate and Angie who practically danced their way through when someone bumped into me causing my drink to spill all over my hand. The guy gave a quick, 'my bad' then continued on. I sighed and stopped Kate.
"I'm gonna go clean this up," She nodded and turned back to Angela. I went straight to the bathroom again and washed my hands. I knew that Emmett, Rose and Jasper were up there, but that didn't explain why Alice would suddenly run off. And I hadn't heard anything about Edward. Last I'd heard was that he was on his way, but that was more than an hour ago. I shook my head to get him out of my mind. I was trying not to think about him, because when I did I felt like I was going to explode.
Staring into the mirror I took a deep breath. I needed to regain control, I needed to focus. I needed the confidence I had had before I'd arrived. Approaching Alice's event, all the confidence I had built up seemed to disappear the closer I came and when I arrived it had completely vanished. I was running solely on adrenaline and alcohol. Everything had happened so fast that it was shocking that I had gotten here at a reasonable hour.
Earlier that hadn't been the case, I had been calm, overly assure that Alice had everything planned out only to be side swiped when she didn't. I didn't have much of a choice but I finally take my life into my own hands. So without much thought I flew to Main Street and in four hours I was able to pick out a dress, get my hair and nails done then rushed back home to get dressed and apply what little makeup I could so I didn't look as exhausted as I felt.
Upon entering the club Alice met me the entrance hall. She was strangely surprised by the outfit I had on. And I was surprised because she actually really liked it. I didn't try to think about how odd and naked I felt in the tight fitted black dress that exposed my pale legs and most of my back and shoulders. A few weeks ago I would have never dared to wear anything like it, but today for some reason I was beaming with confidence. And it honestly wasn't the dress. It was me. I'd found confidence in me.
I shook myself mentally; I should be finding Alice instead of standing here staring at myself in the bathroom. But I couldn't help smiling to myself in the mirror before drying my hands and leaving the restroom.
I knew it would be impossible to find Kate and Angela now so I just made my way to the stairs. Climbing both flights of stairs in my heels had my thighs and calves on fire by the time I reached the top. I allowed myself a moment to catch my breath before I glanced around the sectioned area. I spotted Alice almost immediately. She was taking another shot. In that moment I grew extremely annoyed. Here she was drinking like she didn't have a care in the world when she'd deserted me for the second time today.
And really, hadn't Alice had enough to drink. I made my way over unable to hide my annoyance.
"There you are, I've been looking everywhere for you," Unconsciously my hand went to my hips like a parent scolding a child. Alice turned up at me with a smile as if had been expecting me. Then she let out a light chuckle like everything was suddenly falling into place.
I wanted to ask what she was scheming but I heard someone utter my name. I noticed the person seated next to Alice and I had to do a double take.
"Edward," My hand fell from my hips. Once I noticed Edward it was hard to understand why I hadn't earlier. "You're here?" I was actually very surprised to see him and nervous. This was first time we'd seen each other since before Christmas. He must have been even more surprised to see me because he was staring at me. I felt my pulse race.
He blinked when he caught himself.
"Yeah, I finally made it." He smiled up at me and it dazzled me. I forgot for a moment that I needed to breathe.
"What time is it?" I heard Alice ask. Her sudden remake interrupted me, breaking Edwards hold on me. My face sudden flushed as I turned away.
"Uh,"I didn't have my phone on me. Alice had taken my clutch when I'd first arrived and I hadn't seen it since. She said that it would get it my way. I didn't argue with her.
Emmett answered. "11:37, why?" Both Rosalie and Jasper glanced at her, now interested.
"No reason," Alice chimed and got to her feet.
"Come with me," She grabbed my wrist before turning to her brother.
"You too," She began to drag me to the stairs.
"Uh, Alice," I stumbled after her. Was she mad? Didn't she notice the five inch pumps I was wearing? She pulled me so fast that I almost tripped down the stairs but Edward helped steady me.
"Alice, please be more careful," He snapped, eyeing his sister. I'd never seen him talk to her like that before. He spoke as if I was something precious to him, something that held extreme value.
"Thanks," I smiled despite myself.
"What would I do without you?" He grinned and I felt my heart jump in my chest.
"I don't know schedule your own appointments." I chuckled up at him. And as I stared into his beautiful green eyes, which were flashing with the strobe lights, I thought for a moment that wasn't exactly what he had meant.
"Uh," Alice interrupted. "Are you two done?" She huffed and pulled me along. She led us through the thick hoard of dancing people to the stairs that led down to the bathrooms or to the roof. She took us to the roof.
It was my first time seeing it and I had to admit that Alice was a complete genius. There was a small group of people lingering about and the cool but not cold air felt like relief to my lungs from the stuffy enclosure downstairs.
I could see the city passed the fence that enclosed the roof. It was beautiful, like I never seen it before and I'm sure I would have tried to get a better view if it hadn't been for Alice's death grip. Honestly, where did she get her strength? "Come on," Alice skipped forward, dragging me behind. Unconsciously I glance behind me at Edward. He only shrugged. He couldn't fight Alice and win. Or so he said. I think it was just easier not too. Alice pulled me to the bar and finally let go of me when I slammed into the counter.
"Oh sorry," I glared over at her but she only smiled sweetly up at me and I just didn't have it in my heart be mad at her. Of course she knew this.
"What can I get you?" The women tending the bar asked. Alice leaned forward.
I suddenly felt Edward next to me and I turned to him. I wished I hadn't because I wasn't sure what I should say. I veered my gaze away racking my brain to say anything. It was awkward standing next to him without speaking. It felt much like the first we'd gone to lunch together except I didn't have that nervous, nauseous feeling in the pit of my stomach. I figured I should start with the basics. I turned to him just as he open his mouth.
"So how was your-" I begin.
"So what do you-"He asked simultaneously.
We both stopped for a moment before we burst into laughter.
"Sorry," I added.
"No, ladies first." He smiled and waited patiently. I blushed.
In the background I heard Alice say something but I wasn't paying much attention.
"I was just curious if you were able to resolve everything?"
He leaned forward into the bar counter and turned to me. "With your help, yes! Sorry I had to ask you to do that on your day off. I hope it wasn't too much to ask?"
I laughed. "What can I say, my boss' a slave driver?"
Edward laughed and honestly couldn't' think of a better sound in the world. "I guess I'll have to have a talk with him."
"Don't be too harsh. He's actually a pretty nice guy. Not as intimating as originally thought." I teased and he laughed again.
A few months ago I never would have imagined that I would be comfortable enough to joke like this with not only me employer but Edward as well. And never in a million years would I have thought he would be okay with it.
Unexpectedly Alice cut between us and dropped three shot glasses in front of us.
"This is on you Edward,"
"Really?" Edward laughed unsurprised by his sisters' actions, more amused.
"Bottom's up," Alice took her glass and held it up.
I cringed staring at the dark liquid. Tequila, again? "Alice, I can't!" My stomach began to churn at the thought of tasting the liquor.
"Of course you can, besides are you going to refuse a drink from your boss."
"Alice," Edward breathed playfully.
"That could get you written up," She winked and then lick the salt around the rim of the glass, downed her shot, and followed by stuffing a slice of lime in her mouth. She handed the empty glass back toward the bartender and pushed herself away.
"Enjoy you two?" Then she was gone. We both watched her dance off, happy and content as if she'd just conquered the world.
"What's she up too?" Edward muttered still gazing after his sister.
"I don't know. I stopped trying to keep up with Alice a long time ago."
He grinned. "That's probably for the best." Then he sighed reaching for his glass.
"We should probably just do as were told."
I eyed him suspiciously. "Are you trying to get me drunk?" I asked smiling.
"Maybe?" He smirked holding up his glass.
"Well you've already seen me drunk, you know? It's not a pretty picture." I added but I obliged him when I pick up my own shot.
"I think that depends on who's looking." Edward grinned seductively. I felt my chest tighten.
"I guess." I stated before we threw the liquid to the back of our throats. I shuddered, pushing the glass as far from me as I could.
"No more," I pleaded. I couldn't take anymore. The alcohol streaming through my system already had me struggling to keep my focus and balance.
"Okay, Ms. Swan no more."
I sighed relieved that Edward was nothing like his 'most of the time' pushy little sister. Or big sister, seeing as Alice was actually older than Edward. The song changed then and I realized that they weren't playing the same music up here as inside. Inside was all about the beat, anything to get you to move while the music coming through the speakers up here was slower, not as distracting. I watched the few people dancing in the middle and wondered if it really was as easy as they made it out to be. The mayor had once commented on how graceful I danced but I knew I couldn't trust him and his dazzling smile.
"Um do you want to dance?" I turned to Edward horrified.
"No, no" I shook my head. Why would he even ask?
He laughed. "Why not?" My mouth literally fell open. Was he really that interested in seeing me stumble along like a new born baby fawn?
"Have you seen me walk?" He chuckled again. "I have," He laughed as if he had remembered something I hadn't.
"But you danced so well at the Charity Ball." I saw him frown momentarily and I knew that he wasn't quite over the incident with James. Even now I wasn't sure if Edward had kept his promise but I certainly hadn't heard anything about James lately even in the business world.
"That was a fluke." I added. It honestly was the first and only time that I ever danced besides the few ballet lessons I had a child.
"So you can dance with Leslie, but not me?" It always took me back when Edward addressed the Mayor by his first name. I mean how many people I knew were the personal friend to the Mayor. Then again how many people are personal friends to Edward Cullen?
"I had no choice. The mayor asked me to dance and I didn't want to…," I stopped remembering the only reason I had accepted his hand.
"Didn't want to what?" Edward asked a little too curious. I just wondered how he would feel if I admitted that I hadn't wanted to appear that I was less worthy than anyone that should be standing next to Edward. What was more unexpected was that I didn't feel like that right now standing next to him.
"Didn't want to what?" He eyed me. The song changed again.
I sighed, my eyes drawing away from his. "I didn't want to embarrass you." I whispered in a low breath honestly hoping he would hear and wouldn't ask me to repeat it.
There was a short pause before I turned up and might his gaze again. He appeared to be very confused.
"Bella, you could never embarrass me." I blinked up at him, hoping that I had heard correctly. Never embarrass him, he'd said. I chuckled to myself over the irony.
"So you say. Either way, now you know why I can't dance… with you." He arched a brow.
"Can't, or won't." His lips pulled up into a dangerously teasing smirk.
"Both." I turned away, my face flushing.
"Well now I'm really curious," He stated and I glanced back at him. He had that glint it his eye, the one that Alice got when she was planning something devilish.
"No!" I pushed away but I wasn't fast enough for him, because he grabbed my hand and led me to where a few others were moving together.
I tried to resist him in utter failure. Had he always been this strong? "Edward, no please!" I pleaded with him. If had one good bone in his body then he wouldn't do this, to me. Instead he only laughed and I felt my heart sink to the floor. "Please," I begged again before his swung me around and I stumbled right into his firm chest. The first thing I noticed was that we were backwards. The others were practically spooning while we were face to face.
"Come on Bella, you can't possibly be that bad."
"Okay so I wrong, you can be that bad." Edward laughed as he walked me off of the dance floor. I frowned as I followed him. I wasn't sure why when all I wanted to do was crawl into the ground and disappear.
"I told you I couldn't dance, but noooo! You had to see for yourself." I snapped more irritated than I had been in a while.
"Yeah but I didn't think you were that bad." He turned to me. I glared at him. He laughed and threw up his hands in defense. "I'm joking Bella. You really weren't that bad."
I didn't believe his lies. I knew I was that bad. The odd stares and low chuckles said it all. But somehow I didn't think Edward noticed them at all. He just kept holding onto me, trying to lead me in the right direction. Though I was so embarrassed I could die, I had also felt really happy. It was an odd feeling. Edward always had that power though. No matter how bad things were, being with Edward always made it seem okay. I understood now, why it had been so easy to fall in love with him. I honestly didn't even have a chance.
"Why are you smiling?" I heard. I blinked and realized that I had entered my own world again.
"No reason," I answered moving toward the gated roof's edge. I stared down over the bustling city below. It was noisy and dirty but tonight the city was light up like the fourth of July. It was breathtaking. Honestly I had never seen it like this, or maybe I had never really paid this much attention.
"It's beautiful." I stated as I linked my fingers into the circular rings that made up the gate. I could see Edward out of corner of my eye, but more than that, I could feel him there.
"Yes it is," I turned him and his eyes met mine. For a split second I thought that maybe he had been talking about me when he said that. I mean he hadn't glanced at the city not once.
Then I heard it, the countdown that had begun but for some reason I couldn't move. I could only stare at the man that made my heart pound in my chest, the man that I had come to love.
And just as I heard the shriek of fireworks shoot into to the sky Edward pulled me in and pressed his lips to mine. As the spark lit the sky, his lips lit a fire in my heart that would burn for all of eternity.
I didn't response at first, I had been caught off. My eyes were wide with surprise and my breath stopped in my throat. But more than that, everything stopped in that second.
I couldn't hear the yell's bringing in the New Year, I didn't see flashing lights as cameras went off. I didn't even care that everyone and anyone could see us.
In that moment, there were only three things that I was completely confident of.
One, Edward was out of my league and I didn't care.
Two, Edward liked me, I wasn't sure of how much but at least he felt something.
And three, I was utterly and positively in love with him. I wouldn't in a million years want anyone other than Edward.
When that moment passed both my mind and body relaxed against him and I allowed myself to kiss him with everything I could muster. I melted into him and he pulled me closer. We fit together like a pitchers hand and his glove.
I craved him. I couldn't get enough of him. His scent filled me with every breath, he tasted slightly of liquor but somehow it was sweet and compelling. My chest began to burn but I didn't want to breathe if I had to pull away. After all this was what I'd wanted for so long. I kissed him like I had never kissed anyone and even if I may have wanted too, I wasn't sure I could stop. It was like my own life depended on this kiss.
And I wasn't running anymore.
Edward smiled against my lips and pulled away slowly but I could still feel the twinge of something there, the connection that we had just made. He smiled his glorious smile and I could tell that he was happy. Like a child that just received everything he'd wanted for Christmas.
I gave him a soft smile in return, embarrassed by the way my body curved into him as we stared at each other for a long moment before the noise of where we were began to ring in our ears and the tape that was our lives began to play again. I pulled back slowly when I heard Alice's tiny voice over the roar of the celebration. She was pushing her way towards us, Jasper on her heels. I wondered if she had seen us, and by the look on her face, she may have. She was beaming. Finally she met us and I pulled a big grin unto my face with one last glanced at Edward.
"Happy New Years, Bella!" She jumped into me for a hug. I stumbled back as I caught her.
"Happy New Year Alice." Then she was wishing the same happiest on her brother. I watched them together and his gaze caught mine again. My face flushed, and wondered if I would ever get use to his gaze.
My heart was still pounding in its cavity in my chest and every hair on my body was on alert. There was also this overwhelming feeling of joy. Joy like I had never felt in my entire life.
Edward smiled and suddenly it hit me hard, the harsh truth and reality. I turned away, leaving them behind me.
I couldn't cut through the eccentric crowd fast enough. I was buzzed already which wasn't helping but I headed to the bar anyway.
"Water," I huffed. The women behind the counter didn't hesitate. She could probably smell my desperation. I was breathing like I had just run a marathon and my head was spinning. I truly couldn't tell whether it was from the alcohol.
I couldn't stop replaying the last minute in my head. I was playing it so much I was starting to think that I was making it up yet I could still feel the slight tingle Edwards lips left on mine.
"Here you go." The waitress stated setting a glass of water down in front of me. I drank it down immediately. The cold water helped cool the heat that Edward had created in me but I couldn't seem to get myself under control. My body was shaking and I was starting to get clammy. I couldn't believe that one kiss from Edward could do this to me. I mean it wasn't even our first kiss even if it had felt like it.
"Hey Bella are you okay?" I heard Edward's voice next to me and I felt his hand touch my shoulder. I shuddered under him.
"I think I'm going to faint." It was true; I was starting to get dizzy. Everything began to move and nothing seemed to make sense. Not until I felt Edward touch my face.
"Bella, Bella look at me." He turned me to him and as if part of a magic trick, the room stopped spinning. In fact all I could see was him. My breathing began to regulate and the shaking ceased.
"Better?" He asked. Too amazed by the effect he had on me I only nodded.
"Are you sure," He asked more firm. I nodded again, the only thing I could do.
"Don't move, I'll be right back. " Then he was gone, but I was still frozen still staring at the empty space that was just filled with him. This was worse than I had thought. This wasn't just love anymore. I didn't just love Edward anymore.
I needed Edward.
How I had survived without him was astonishing, but now there was no going back? I felt sick again, but this time in a good way if that was possible. My only question was, could he possible ever come to love me, need me the way that I loved and needed him.
Suddenly I sensed him again.
"Bella," Again our eyes met. "Come on," He took my hand with such care and led me away. I couldn't draw my eyes from him as he led me along, down the stairs, through the dancing crowd and out of the building unto the busy sidewalk.
Wow, so intense! I love it! Please Read and Review. Would be great to hear your thoughts!
-Baby!