Disclaimer: Yeah it took a while for me to write, I didn't get as many reviews, and a couple of my favorite reviewers didn't, so yeah there…

Disclaimer Deuce: "Our light that shines strong only lasts for so long"

Embry's POV

"Tie me to the bed post!" Wait, what the hell? I thought forcing myself awake. My vision was readjusting.

"I would swallow my pride
I would choke on the rinds
but the lack there of would leave me empty inside
I would swallow my doubt
turn it inside out
find nothing but faith in nothing
wanna put my tender
heart in a blender
watch it spin around to a beautiful oblivion
rendezvous and I'm through with you."

Finally I turned off the radio. I sat up to the regulated back cracking and realigning I'd gotten used to. I made my way down to the breakfast table. I remembered that Patrick was coming over to tell his story, I didn't like the idea. I wanted to strangle and kill the guy myself, but it may have more to do with the fact that he attacked me and he liked Leah more than the fact he was a vampire. I rolled my shoulder back connected to my bad arm trying to test it out, the pain was still there. I looked around the table and noticed Jasper wasn't anywhere to be seen. I heard the faint noise of a electric guitar from the basement, so low I barely could hear it with the door closed. I opened the door and saw Jasper at the bottom of the stairs playing his guitar. The song was laid back, but fast at the same time, like it didn't have to finish, it was in no hurry to, but was still a fast song, it was hard to describe.

I made my way down to him and watched in astonishment as he played with such skill I hadn't ever seen before.

"Did you write that?" Jasper laughed softly and shook his head.

"Sorry, Eric Johnson beat me to it, it's called Cliffs of Dover." He finished playing the song and I had to make sure my jaw wasn't hanging open.

"I may have made a couple mistakes, you should look up the song, maybe we could play it, it's got a pretty nice drum and bass part too." I nodded and smiled.

"You're going to sing while playing that?" Jasper laughed in response.

"That's the great thing, there are no words, weren't you the one who told me 'words are very unnecessary, they can only do harm'?" he said grinning. I shrugged then agreed with him. He unplugged his electric guitar and started putting it away, but caught an odd feeling radiating off me. He smiled then turned his back and in a blur he returned with two acoustic guitars. I shook my head in disgust, for someone who couldn't read my mind he sure picked up pretty fast. His smile turned to a frown.

"Did I get it wrong?" Jasper asked handing me my acoustic guitar. I laughed again.

"No, but you can read me better then Edward can." I said pulling my guitar in to position. Jasper smiled softly and moved his in to playing position as well.

"See there is a reason for that, your thoughts are guarded, and you keep your own deep thoughts out of your head, you're protected from Edward in that way. Your heart on the other hand, you don't guard it, you are so open with your passions, your emotions, it radiates off you. You can't help it, it's one of the things that keep me puzzled by you." I raised an eyebrow to him looking him in the eye. His eyes finally met mine before he looked down at his guitar and slid his hand up the neck and back down softly, as if reacquainting himself with it. He moved his fingers up and down the guitar as if warming up, and then stopped abruptly as he noticed I was watching him, he instantly felt bad.

"I'm sorry…" he said apologizing for who knew what, and then I realized. He felt bad for showing off. Sometimes Jasper still amazed me. My eyes dropped down to my guitar and as if at a loss I did nothing for a couple seconds. My left hand started moving feeling the calluses that had been building up since I started playing guitar over a week ago, The Cullen's claimed I was a fast learner, but as with everything else I'd become really good at I simply had so much time I had spent six or more hours a day teaching myself guitar, much less the time Jasper spent teaching me. I grabbed a pick and started strumming. I played a song, my favorite song by a band named Anberlin. I tried to sing making an attempt at the first stanza but every time my hands screwed up and I quickly got frustrated. Jasper's attention refocused quickly.

"That's Cadence, isn't it?" I nodded trying to keep playing but every distraction was throwing me off. Jaspers eyes turned to my hands then in a moment he was following the same chord progression I was. He smiled and began to sing.

"Write down, to remind yourself on how it can be, how it can be" I was slightly surprised but I kept strumming and Jasper followed me just the same, I wasn't aware he knew the song. His singing voice was so much better than mine; he almost perfectly matched the band's sound.

"Heartstrings, you're tugging at my heartstrings, now, heartstrings

"Helpless, I have become so helpless to your touch,

Oh, touch me somehow

Restless, you leave me restless

Breathless wait for me." I didn't know all the words myself I was rather surprised Jasper did. His hands moved flawlessly and his voice didn't sound strained as if this was all second nature to him.

"The closer I come to you

The closer I am to finding God

You're a miracle to me

The closer I come to you

The closer I am to finding God

You're a miracle to me." Until Jasper finished singing the chorus I wasn't aware the song had so religious backing to it, I suppose I never really stopped and listened. While listening I stumbled with my fingers as I had stopped concentrating on each note.

"Burning, like Joan of Arc to see you, just to feel you

Cadence, well I dance with the dead cause I believe

Yes I believe, yes I believe

Stifle, Paul said that you stifle him

Again and again and again"

"The closer I come to you

The closer I am to finding God

You're a miracle to me

The closer I come to you

The closer I am to finding God

You're a miracle to me."

"And if these are my parting words

Grant me this, my last request

Hold me here, until I sleep

If I burn, then I burn for you."

The words hit home for me. Double meanings cascaded through my mind as to what it meant, whether it means passion, or a desire, whether it meant pain, or dying. Thoughts spun through my mind as I stumbled on the frets. I concentrated and got back on the melody, Jasper didn't seem bugged at all by my ruining of the song. Jasper sang the chorus and we ended the song together, it reminded me of my first attempts at drum set. Besides the obvious, he overcompensated saying I was doing amazing when anyone could see I wasn't.

Patrick was going to come over and give us his story, how he became a vampire, I personally didn't give a shit. I didn't like him. He didn't need to injure me for me to hate him. He wanted to go out with my girlfriend, I knew that was terribly possessive of me but I was more or less suspicious of any guy who showed any interest, to me they were all trying to ruin my life. Deep down I knew their sole purpose wasn't to ruin my life, just a sad little speed bump of a morale lapse in their road to happiness. The gaping hole in this argument was it was up to Leah as well. No one had forced her to go out with David. It was this gaping hole in my logic that caused me so much fear, so much pain. There was no way to control her love, it might last forever it might have never died, just hid, I didn't understand I just couldn't think of this with Patrick coming over soon, it'd rip me apart. A light that shines strong only lasts for so long. Jasper had made his way up to Alice. I put my guitar lethargically I wasn't looking forward to seeing Patrick again. Leah appeared at the door upstairs. I turned away quickly to compose myself and put on a smile.

"Hey Lee." I said feigning a good mood. She looked causal but her eyes betrayed something more. She stopped in front of me confused for a moment then she reached out and hugged me pulling herself closer to me, tucking her head in to my shoulder on my left side, softly hugging me and breathing on to my the skin just above my t-shirt. I softly rocked her back and forth in my arms. I sighed quietly kissing the top of her hair and taking her smell in. it was relaxing, it was soothing, it was happiness.

"Embry, I love you… I picked you, I need you. Don't you ever forget that." I nodded and she felt that then she pulled away slightly and looked me in the eye.

"Don't ever forget that." She repeated again before leaning in and kissing me passionately. She pulled an inch away and I needed to ask.

"How'd you know?" I asked curiously.

"Edward." She answered. Of course. I thought to myself in retrospect I heard a knock at the door then realized who it was. Patrick was here. My body tensed next to Leah, she felt me and wrapped her arm around mine and cooed next to me forcing me to relax, I'd become much more high strung then I used to be, stresses got to me that never had before. I was angry at any guy that looked at Leah funny, they were all potential threats to me. She leaned upwards while pulling me down and kissed me softly on the cheek.

"Everything will be fine." She whispered in to my ear before detaching herself and hugging Patrick. My body turned to ice as she hugged him, I felt betrayed, hurt, dead. The blood in my veins was the only thing convincing me otherwise as Patrick looked over her shoulder and smirked at me, I barely heard a growl and turned and saw Jasper baring his teeth at Patrick, whose expression quickly changed. They released slowly as I felt my body temperature return to normal.

I knew she wasn't cheating on me, this was just a casual friend she used to have, but I couldn't change the cold feeling I had running through my body. I already didn't trust him. If I didn't distrust him enough already, I knew one slip, one moment of mindlessness and My angel, my princess Leah would be gone forever, I'd always known she didn't like that kind of affection, But deep down I wanted to call her those names, she was my everything and I couldn't live without her, so naturally anything that threatened that drove me crazy. I sat down on a couch and much to my dismay Leah sat away from me, she didn't sit near Patrick either, deep down I imagined it was so this wasn't any more painful for Patrick then it had to be, but I had different plans in mind, I was hoping to make it excruciating, I wanted him to know that Leah and I wouldn't be broken up, I wanted to cause him pain like I hadn't felt for anyone ever besides David. Maybe that was it, it was simply my reaction to having the most precious person to me being threatened away from me.

My attention turned to Jasper, whose eyes never once left me, Edward was on the other side of him with an arm around Bella watching me carefully. All the Cullen's were standing but the four wolves, including Harley were sitting on couches, Leah had decided to sit next to Harley, Jacob next to me, and at the focal point Patrick, he had a self assured presence about him that irked me to no end, maybe I was still finding every flaw with him, hating him for each and every little thing he did, I was sure I'd find everything annoying about him. Now that I was examining him I smiled in the fact that he didn't seem to like Leah's smell. It made sense, Vampire's found our smell appalling, unfortunately for me. Because of Leah's time with the Cullen's it didn't bug her nearly as much. Patrick made a smooth motion to explain that he was ready to begin his story.

"As some of you know several years ago I took an internship in a construction company in Seattle, Well we'd just landed a large contract so our boss took us to a bar and grill, since some of us were under aged. We went and a very attractive red haired woman who introduced herself as Victoria. She seemed particularly taken by me, in my gut I knew something was wrong but I went along with her anyway that night. I don't remember all of it, I just remember being bit on the neck, after the most unimaginable pain I'd ever experienced I woke up and had an unquenchable thirst. It burned my throat, she taught me out to hunt, how to control myself, and even appear normal in the world I'd been nothing but normal in." He took a brief moment as if to assess his thoughts, try to explain the next part better.

"After a while she was teaching me how to fight, that's when my abilities manifested." He pointed at a lamp in front of him and it lifted off the coffee table, then came back down again.

"She told me we were going to kill a girl named Bella." His eyes moved to Bella as she tensed. Patrick's eyes opened wider as he looked at Bella.

"Holy shit, you're Bella aren't you?" Edward wrapped an arm around Bella protecting her from him. She nodded.

"Well she said we could feed on all of Forks and La Push when we were done. I told her I wanted nothing to do with it, La Push was my home town. She tried to force me to stay, but with my abilities I was too much to control, she let me go, telling me that Bella was her only target and La Push wouldn't be touched, I left headed north and I've been traveling back and forth using Seattle as my home." He breathed out, I believed more for a theatrical value than a practical one. His story was done but apparently Edward wasn't pleased.

"So you're home town was La Push and yet, you'd let them be in danger?" Edward questioned pointedly.

"La Push wasn't in danger, Victoria said she'd leave it untouched." Rosalie let out a sharp laugh. Patrick's eyes turned to her.

"And you'd sacrifice all of Forks?" Emmett said obviously not approving. Patrick seemed to be defending himself from all the Cullens. Something I was thoroughly enjoying.

"I thirsted for blood, she was offering it to me. It took all I had within me not to jump at that opportunity." Carlisle calmed the rest of his family.

"Patrick, we're sorry but, we're going to have to ask you to leave." He nodded and turned back to the door walking at a very human pace. He turned back.

"Talk to you later, Lee." Leah much to my chagrin jumped up and ran over and captured him in a hug. My blood froze and I stood up, turned around and left the room. Jasper followed me but I shut the door behind me as I made it to my room. I locked the door and threw myself on the bed. I didn't want to see anyone. I couldn't be mad at Leah for embracing an old friend could I?

Whether it was right or not I was, and for that I couldn't be mad. I was too close to everyone else. I looked out my window. I was only wearing my pants. I sighed heavily and leaped out of my room. My legs hit the ground hard. I looked over my shoulder. I saw the Cullen's but not Leah. I broke out in a dead sprint towards the woods. I sighed as I bounded and then leapt in to the air catching a branch with my hand, with the momentum I'd gained I flung myself higher in to a back flip. I caught the next branch with both my arms. I pulled my body up and stood on the sturdy branch. I crouched bending the branch and launched myself higher in to the trees. I sat and leaned against the trunk swinging my left leg off the branch. I let out a heavy sigh out. I swung my leg back and forth trying to find an excuse for me to be out here by myself. I tried to let all my feelings go without a noise but I wasn't so great at controlling my emotions. Frustration mounted inside me as I couldn't shake the discomfort. I softly hit my head against the trunk of the tree arguing with myself, why the hell couldn't I accept this? Why did she hug him? Why didn't she come next to me after she hugged him? Things like this never used to bug me, why now? Why here? Because you were so sure she was as in love with you as you were with her. The answer slapped me in the face. I know she is. I told myself, but deep down there wasn't the same confidence I'd once had. You know you might not always be enough for her, you're afraid of that. A chill spread threw my body. I tried to warm up but instead I lost my balance and fell from the high branch. I tried to reach for another branch but none were within reach, I put my arms out to catch my fall but that only slowed my impact and I still landed on my face. I didn't get up I didn't move I just laid with my face planted in the snow, feeling it melt around me. I felt so pathetic I didn't have the will to move, just feel the snow melt on my body.

I heard footsteps, running. I groaned softly. I guess someone saw that, not one of my graceful moments. My body refused to move hoping, they'd just keep walking like they hadn't seen it. As I expected that wasn't the case. I wasn't focusing on sound so when I felt warm hands on my shoulder I was surprised. They were soft, caring, they were Leah's. I got up quickly and wiped the snow off me trying to act dignified. She helped brush me off and her hands brushed my naked shoulders, her touch was lightning to my core. She watched and smiled as I shook as her hand slipped down to make soft circles on my chest. She smirked at the reaction she got from me.

"I'm glad I still have that affect on you." I scoffed at her.

"I'd get a MUCH bigger reaction from you if I did that to you." She gasped slightly then slapped me across the face softly. I turned but didn't turn back. I just stayed there. I slowly turned back to face her. Her eyes caught mine and pierced in to my mind with those strong willed eyes. It was those same brown eyes that captivated my very being. They saw through all the bullshit to who a person really was, I'd always admired that about her, but now that I was trying to give bullshit it wasn't too great.

"Embry what's wrong you're off and I can tell." Leah said crossing her arms across her chest, I tried to focus on her face and not how her arms were placed, successfully my attention stayed at her eyes, however I was unsuccessful in fooling her.

"It's nothing just don't worry about it." I turned back away hoping once for a change she wouldn't catch it. Of course it was vain.

"What is it? Is it about Patrick?" I nodded regrettably. She waited expecting me to answer her. I stood and said nothing, this wasn't something I wanted to talk about, much less fight about it, she wouldn't have it though, there was no avoiding this one. I sighed softly.

"I'm uncomfortable with Patrick" she nodded.

"I suppose I'd be uncomfortable with any guy, but him it's even worse I see you hug him and my blood runs cold, my body shuts down and pain shoots through me, it's one of the worst things I've ever experienced." She nodded.

"Well regardless I'm going to hug him if I want to, he's an old friend of mine." She said offhanded. I expected this, she'd always been stubborn. It was one of her endearing traits, and one of her frustrating ones.

"Leah, he's dangerous-" I began to say before she cut me off.

"Don't even try to use that excuse, it has nothing to do with why you don't want me to see him." I rolled my eyes, though she was right I was going to finish what I started saying.

"You saw his eyes, he drinks human blood, he's not nearly as stable as the Cullens are." She groaned and rolled her eyes.

"That has nothing to do with why you don't want me to see him, touch him or be near him." I sighed and nodded quickly.

"No it doesn't. If you don't know by now the reason why I don't want you around him is he wants to go out with you." Leah looked me in the eye weird.

"You were never like this before." I looked away painfully then looked her in the eye.

"I was enough for you before…" I said looking away. Leah's face contorted for a moment.

"So you're just going to use this Dave thing every time you don't agree with what I'm doing?" I tensed at his name, and at the implications of what she just said.

"You know what, just leave me alone I need some time to think." She said walking away. As I watched her walk away I let my body go with my will to stand, falling face first in to the snow. I didn't move I didn't do anything I just let myself drift off to sleep in the winter's afternoon.

Sorry that took so long to update, it's my first from my laptop, so the spacing might be f'ed (I hate Word 2008) I'm going to say review and everyone is going to give me thought provoking reviews okay? Good, As always knucks, high fives, "the nod", rolls of twenty dollar bills and ideas are always welcome. REVIEW.