The faint, light-hearted music floats through the still night air in a wave that comes and go in the darkness that surrounds me. The night is vaguely lit with the bright, round disk that is suspended in the nightfall I'm sitting in.

I won't admit that I'm cold, but in truth, I am. But what did I expect from Canada as it slowly starts its descent in winter? Already a few delicate flakes have fallen from the sky but it hasn't been anything too substantial; not enough to force me inside, which I'm grateful for. Not that I don't want to see her…it's just that I can't stop thinking about how she reacted to me in real life. It just makes this all seem so fake and just seeing her isn't enough anymore because I know it's fake. I guess I always knew that but seeing the comparison between the two would really bring it home.

So that's why I'm sitting on the doorstep to Atlanta's dad's house, trying to avoid whatever's going on inside. From what I've gathered, I think it's like some sort of family reunion. I'm engaged and I've got two kids who are going to start screaming any minute now. I should be so happy right now but I'm not. I'm hollow and empty, praises and congratulations ringing heavy in my ears. I was in there for about two minutes before I told her I was going outside for some air.

That was half an hour ago.

I fiddle with cigarette stick in my right hand, staring at the dull glow that the ashes give out. There was a guy out here earlier, something's telling me that it may have been one of her cousins, but he was smoking and I just felt the sudden need.

I hate the damn things.

Still I take another drag.

Footsteps start quiet behind me before increasing in volume until they stop beside me. Slowly, she drops to her knees and takes up residence at my side. She starts looking at me with those damn green eyes.

I can't bring myself to meet them.

"I thought you gave those up."

I look to the cigarette in my hand and give a sigh as I extinguish it and throw it sideways. "I did."

"Then why?"

Oh Atlanta, my sweet gorgeous Atlanta, you always thought about others before yourself but you're not her are you? Just some inaccurate copy programmed to love me even when she hates me.

I run a hand through my ragged hair and sigh again. "Stressed." That's one way to put it.

She gives me a weak smile and a tentative touch to my bicep. "You do know you can talk to me about anything. If you're having second thoughts-"

"No. I could never have second thoughts about you."

"You can still talk to me though."

"I know." I look up for the first time and meet her gaze. The same green eyes that last stared at me in hatred now look at me in amazement and awe. "I know."

"Then what?"

It took a few minutes before I could come up with an answer that I could say without telling her what was really bugging me. The music behind us still floated and danced in the air but it was long since forgotten between the two of us.

"I'm just thinking really. Thinking how we've changed and ended up here. Cause honestly," I gave her funny look, "this isn't what I planned."

There was that silence again as this time she tried to figure out what to say.

"I think I know what you're getting at." No, really you don't. "This isn't what I had in mind either. I wanted a job and a place that we owned and be at least in our late twenties before having kids, but it's okay. It's early but it's okay." I wish that's what I thought.

"Is that what you thought when you were…"

"Eighteen. Yeah."

"You know what I wanted?"

"What?"

"You. You and the fact I was going to make it to the next sunrise."

"You never did plan things out far."

"Apart from trying to tear down Olympus."

"Yeah…I have the skills, but I just can't be arsed to use them."

"Luke, give me a dollar."

"What? Why?"

"Swear jar." I sighed for a third time before handing it over. "What? I don't want them picking up any bad habits."

I give a small laugh before settling back in to silence. After a while, she shuffled closer and laid her head on my shoulder.

"Luke?"

"Yeah?"

"You do know I love you right?"

No, you don't you never have. You're not her and you never will be but…yes, yes I do.

"Cause I do, what makes you think I didn't."

She frowns and lifts her head before answering. "I don't know but I keep getting these…these ideas that you don't and then I get really scared because I think…I think I don't love you anymore which I know is wrong because you're great and-"

I place a finger to her lips. I can't listen to her go on about that. I just can't.

"Atlanta!" She turns her head back to the voice.

"Yeah!" She starts to stand and hovers in the doorway.

"I can't seem to get your kids to sleep, do you think you could try. I'm sure Leigh going to start screaming in a minute."

Right on cue the screaming starts.

"I'll just be a minute!" She crouches down and casually runs a hand through my hair. "Come inside soon will you? I miss you."

"Yeah of course." Maybe.

She places a kiss to my forehead before heading inside. It's just then that the blinding flash of light stripes across the starlight. A shooting star. A wish.

I close my eyes. "I wish I could go back and start over."