A/N Heyy! Quick update eh? ;) So I was rereading Holding Back (yes I do that sometimes don't judge me) and then this idea just...suddenly existed. I don't even know how, but...yeah...now it exists, I'm sorry

Title: Awkward Punching

Rating: M

Warnings: language, sexual stuff, weird punches and awkward first times

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Ed lay on the bed, legs spread, a bored look painted on her pretty face. Honestly, never in her life had she thought she would ever be in this position; lying naked on a double bed, her legs parted shamelessly, as her so-called boyfriend stroked her thighs.

Ed sighed. Roy had said, all of a sudden, that he wanted to do this, but now he was hesitating, and it was pissing her off. She had been reading an alchemy book, lying comfortably on the couch, when Roy had come, all confident and cocky, and told her that he wanted to do this. Yet now, he looked anything but cocky and confident. To be frank, he looked nervous. Hell, he looked absolutely terrified.

Perhaps one would be self-conscious if their lover stared so intensely at their vagina, but after the total of two hours that they had been in this exact same position, Ed had gotten used to it. Roy seemed to think that if he stared in-between her legs long enough he'd do it better.

"Are you gonna do it or not?" she asked for the umpteenth time.

She watched as Roy gulped, his hold on her thighs tightening. "I-I will, just let me focus for a moment."

Rolling her eyes, Ed went silent once more. She had 'let him focus' for two hours now.

Truthfully, once Roy told her what he wanted to do she had been excited and eager for the pleasure to come. But as soon as he had her naked and lying on the bed, he had chickened out, and after that the staring ensued. Ed had been confused at first, wondering what the hell was going on and why the fuck did he stop, but now she was just exasperated.

"Roy, we've been here for two hours, are you gonna do it or not? Because if not tell me now, I have stuff to do."

Roy threw a glare her way, spreading her legs further decisively. "I-I haven't done this before all right? I wanted to wait for the one, so be grateful my heart has chosen you or else you wouldn't even be getting this–"

"Just do it already! For fuck's sake!"

"I-I don't know how!"

Ed groaned, her hands smacking her face in frustration. "Just lick me in places and you'll figure it out! Staring is not gonna do anything!"

"I need to figure out where to start!" Roy retorted, leaning forward to study her more closely.

Ed sighed, the covers underneath her whispering as she wriggled around. "Just do it, Roy. You can't be that bad at it."

"And how would you know? And what if I am? You'll never let me live it down!" He looked more horrified with every word, thoughts and mortifying scenarios surely coming to mind.

Ed paused at that. "Well yeah, but, I mean, you'll get better."

She heard Roy groan, and his forehead softly connected with her knee. "I'll always be known as the guy who can't give proper oral to his girlfriend..."

"Roy, you're overreacting."

He lifted his head, his eyes connecting with her golden ones. He looked pretty desperate. "Am I, though?"

"You'll never know until you try."

He went silent, tearing his gaze away from hers and back in-between her legs, before, finally, he leaned closer, gently touching her clit with his lips.

Ed could've cried. Fucking finally. There was still hope of finishing that book today.

She and Roy hadn't been together for long, so they were still figuring out what each other liked and did not like. They'd made love on a few occasions, and it had been simply amazing, so, even though Roy claimed to have never given oral before, Ed was pretty confident he would do all right. She had never received it before either, so what could possibly go wrong?

Slowly, she felt Roy's hesitant tongue on her, and it was as though someone had flipped the switch, turning her body from off to on. Goose bumps rose on her skin, and fire shot through her whole body, concentrating in her lower abdomen. Her breathing accelerated, and her heart picked up the pace in anticipation.

This was going to feel amazing, she just knew it.

Tentatively, Roy took a moment to explore the feeling, and trailed his tongue downwards, making Ed bite her bottom lip. The image in front of her was erotic enough to leave her throbbing for more; Roy sitting in between her legs, his mouth connected to the most private part of her body.

Almost subconsciously, she lifted her legs, earning a hum of thanks from Roy as she gave him easier access. He leaned back a moment later, licking his lips thoughtfully.

"You don't taste too bad, actually," he mused, making Ed scowl.

"What d' you mean by that, you bastard? You thought I was gonna taste like shit?"

Roy shrugged, looking lost and apologetic, and way out of his depth. "How should I know? I've never done this before. Would you think genital stuff would taste magically nice?"

For a second she imagined herself in Roy's place, with Roy's genitals in her mouth, and she blushed, grimacing. "Okay, I got your point."

Roy smiled at her in amusement, as though knowing exactly what she imagined, and Ed shot him a glare. Sighing, he looked back down and leaned in, his tongue reconnecting with her clit. Ed squirmed.

"D-Don't stop this time, okay?" she breathed, licking her lips as short bouts of pleasure shot through her body. Her hands fisted the sheets almost automatically as she prepared herself.

Roy grunted in response, earning himself a half-hearted kick on the shoulder, before they both fell silent.

After a few minutes had gone by of nothing happening, Ed felt Roy stop, lifting his head up. He looked worried, defeated even.

"Do you even feel anything? You're not making literally any noise." Just as Ed had opened her mouth to explain, Roy seemingly panicked, and added, "I–I really don't know how to do this."

Ed sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. "I do feel something, it's just not that mind-blowing holy shit I'm fucking dying kind of pleasure you usually make me feel."

Roy was frowning, listening as attentively as a student listening to his favourite teacher. "So what do I have to do...?" he asked finally, gnawing on his bottom lip. "What felt better?"

Ed lifted her back slightly, using her finger to point where she felt the most pleasure. "Well, I liked when you did that weird sucking slash licking thing right here."

Roy had shoved his face in-between her legs, and he was so close she could feel his breath against her vagina. She rolled her eyes.

Pulling back, he nodded decisively and, abruptly, he shoved her back down, earning a nasty curse from her. He ignored it.

Quickly leaning back in, he murmured, "At least you're wet," before he resumed the licking, opening her legs so he could have more access to the place she had pointed at.

It took a few moments, but after that the sparks were back, making Ed bite her lip and fist the sheets.

"You're doing it," she told him encouragingly, and Roy reacted, his actions becoming more confident and less tentative. He applied more pressure, making Ed release a small gasp as a sudden burst of pleasure spread throughout her body.

Roy continued, for how long Ed could no longer tell. Her mind was focused exclusively on the pleasure and the way Roy looked as he pleasured her, until she decided to grab his hair in a gentle grip to guide him where it felt the best.

Roy seemed to sense what she was trying to do, for he moved when she tugged, and soon Ed was really close to reaching her climax.

She let out a low moan, one of those that Roy liked, more for encouragement than anything, but she would've been lying if she said it had been forced.

Roy moved, shifting to the right and circling her clit with his tongue. Ed threw her head back, grunting and breathing heavily.

She had known Roy would get the hang of it eventually. She had had faith in him; Roy managed to do everything perfectly, even if it was his first time–

She had no idea what exactly Roy did, but it suddenly made her tremble, and she threw her head back, moaning as Roy kept on doing it and, instinctively, she rolled her hips in a wild, wanton manner, the hand tangled in Roy's hair pushing him down for more.

Roy grunted, pulling away abruptly, and Ed, confused and needy beyond relief, opened her eyes.

"Roy, what the fuck?" she slurred, glaring at him with hot amber eyes. "You were doing well, why–"

Then she saw it; blood.

She shot up, eyes wide and panicked, the pleasure completely forgotten. Roy had his eyes shut tightly in what she guessed was pain, both of his hands clamped over his mouth.

"Roy!" she yelled, shaking his shoulder. "What the actual fuck is wrong with you!?"

Slowly, he opened his eyes a crack, and tears of pain gathered at the corners. He just stared at her, before gently taking his hands away from his face and sticking his tongue out. Ed gasped.

"Holy mother of– Why the fuck is your mouth all bloody!?"

Roy glared at her and, still with his tongue out, said, "I bit mah tongue."

Ed blinked, staring at him blankly. When she recovered, she blurted, "How the fuck did you manage that!?"

Roy's glare remained, and he pointed aggressively in-between her legs, making Ed instinctively look down.

"Your vagina punched me!" he half-yelled half-slurred. Blood stained his teeth and lips, and just opening his mouth seemed to bring him a great deal of pain.

Ed stared. What Roy was saying made no sense, so her mind tried to find what exactly he meant. Had she accidentally hit him? She had felt something hard connect with her pelvic bone when she'd rolled her hips. She had paid no attention to it at the time, but now that she thought about it maybe that had been Roy's jaw...

She winced. Oups.

Guilt made her chest clench, and she bit her lip, her brows furrowing in concern as she rested a hand on Roy's shoulder. He had shut his eyes again, massaging his jaw. He kept his mouth open so his tongue didn't hurt.

"Um," she started awkwardly. "I'm sorry...?"

"I got punched by a vagina," Roy murmured dejectedly, ignoring her apology.

Ed grimaced. "Oh, come on, I said I'm sorry."

Roy finally looked at her, giving her the most defeated and disconsolate look she had ever seen, his bottom lip curling dolefully.

"I'm officially the worst oral giver ever."

A/N Aww poor Royyyy *hugs*

Now you know why in Holding Back he "pushed her down" when she went to roll her hips LMAO I'M A GENIUS YES YES I KNOW THE FUTURE BECAUSE I ACTUALLY HAD NO IDEA THIS WOULD TURN OUT LIKE THIS MUAHAHAHAHAHA

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