What Once Was (A Steins;Gate 0 Story)
Chapter 36-Turning In The Paper
Disclaimer:I don't own Steins;Gate, only this story...
The next morning was better than the previous one, although that wasn't saying much, since Kurisu's mother had walked in on them and that was pretty much the worst. Kurisu had gotten more sleep than before, but was still tired. On the bright side, for the first time since the beginning of the trip, she didn't feel the need to go throw up in the bathroom. That fact alone was enough to make the morning better automatically in her opinion. That didn't mean that she felt like she had recovered completely, but it was a sign that she was getting better. She still felt sick, just not as much as before.
Okabe was glad to hear it as well, having been so worried about her the whole time. As they were lying in bed about to get up, Kurisu's phone began ringing. She picked it up, noticing that the time that they had gotten up was the same as the day before, then answered it.
"Hello! I was just calling to let you know that breakfast is ready." Reina's voice rang out loud and clear, as energetic as ever.
Kurisu definitely wasn't expecting it to be her mom on the phone, but she also hadn't paid much attention to who it was before she answered it. "Mom? Couldn't you have just come up here to tell us like you did…Oh." She started, before remembering what had happened the last time she had done that. "Never mind. We'll be right down."
"See you then, I'll be waiting!" Reina said, before ending the call.
"How that woman is so cheerful all the time, especially in the morning, is a mystery to me. It's kind of annoying." Kurisu complained, rubbing the last fragments of sleep from her eyes. She was NOT a morning person, nor could she be happy all the time like her mother seemed to be. Unless you made her angry, of course.
"I'm with you on that one. I've got no clue, either." Okabe agreed, also rubbing his eyes. He could sympathize with his fiancée, since he was also not particularly fond of mornings.
After going through the necessary preparations, Okabe and Kurisu walked into the kitchen, ready to eat. Reina was once again, already sitting at the table, but this time she wasn't trying to murder all the food on her plate like the day before. Her face lit up when she saw them enter the room.
"Good morning, you two! I learned my lesson about going to wake you up, so this time I called you instead. After all, I wouldn't want to walk in on you in the process of you two mattress dancing!" Reina laughed, upon seeing their reactions. It was no secret what she was implying.
They were seated at the table by now, sitting across from her, so she got a front row seat to whatever expressions they made. "Mom ! You know how I feel about doing that sort of thing before marriage. Besides, we're not ready to have a child just yet!" Kurisu protested, blushing the same shade of red as her hair.
"Okabe, make sure you give me plenty of grandbabies, alright?" Reina had set her sights on Okabe, now.
"U-Understood. I'll make sure that it happens." Okabe responded, blushing just as much as Kurisu was.
Kurisu turned to him with her mouth open, wondering how he could betray her like that. "Why are you agreeing with her? You don't get to decide that!" She was getting more flustered by the minute, just thinking about it. " It's not like I'd be opposed to the idea, but…" She muttered under her breath, just loud enough for Okabe and Reina to hear. "That's not the point! If we decide it together, then it will happen, but it won't be because you wanted it to!"
"Fair enough. I was just expressing my wish for the future. I never said that it had to be right now, but the sooner you can do it, the better. I'm not getting any younger, you know." Reina backed down, having had her fill of teasing her daughter for now.
By the time they had finished eating and cleaned up after themselves, it was already almost noon. That meant that they had about an hour before all the teachers at the college left for lunch. If they hurried, there should be enough time to turn in her paper.
Okabe remembered that he had told her that they could go do that today if she was feeling better, but he was still uneasy. "Are you sure you're feeling up to this?" He asked.
"Okabe, don't worry. It's like I told you earlier, I'm feeling better today, and I should be fine. Even though I could do it another day, I'd rather not postpone it again. If we go out and get it over with today, then we won't have to worry about it later. Besides, even if something WERE to happen, which it WON'T, I've got you with me. I trust you to take care of me and keep me safe, like you told me that you would back before all of this happened. You can handle that, right?" She fluttered her eyelashes at him.
That sort of behavior was not how she normally acted, but it should suit her purposes just fine. Kurisu had complete faith in what she was saying, and she knew that she could get him to do what she wanted. They were both each other's greatest weakness, after all. There was no way that he could resist her.
It worked like a charm, as Okabe noticeably straightened up, seeming to puff out his chest a bit. "O-Of course, Kurisu! There is nothing for you to fear as long as I'm by your side. I suppose that we can go, if you promise me that you won't overdo it."
"I promise, Okabe. Now, let's get going! If we waste any more time talking about it, then we'll be too late." Kurisu reminded, eager to go and get this over with. She loved him and all, but he was being a little bit too overprotective. In her opinion, anyway. She guessed that she couldn't blame him though, since if the roles were reversed, she would probably be the same way when it came to his wellbeing.
Viktor Chondria University wasn't very far from the house, so they arrived with a little over 30 minutes to spare. Their goal was to make it to the lab where Professor Leskinen would be, so that Kurisu could give him her paper.
"Well, here we are, good old Viktor Chondria. Just follow me, and we can go straight to the lab. It's kind of hard to find if you don't know the way." Kurisu was about to take the lead, but Okabe stopped her.
"That's alright. I've been there plenty of times before when I was a volunteer in the Amadeus project. Let's see if I can still remember it." Okabe reminded, taking the lead.
Kurisu followed behind him, trying her best to keep up with him. It was easy for him to outrun her with those long legs of his, and he would sometimes do it without even realizing it. "When did you…Oh, right. It was in the Beta worldline, wasn't it? I don't mind, I just forgot that you knew where to go for a moment."
After navigating the twists and turns in the school hallways, their destination was soon in sight. Okabe was the first to walk through the open door, and Kurisu was following, but she was further behind. Because of that, he saw something that she didn't when he entered the room. Maho was sitting at a row of computers with her back to him, and although he couldn't see the screen from this distance, he recognized the voice that was coming out of the speakers.
The scientist was talking to someone, but Okabe wasn't paying attention to what they were saying, focused on sneaking a glimpse of the screen to confirm his suspicions. He was able to sneak up on Maho and peek over her shoulder, which granted him a glimpse of a virtual Kurisu. Once he was that close to her, Maho noticed, and frantically turned off the computer screen. She spun around to face him in the chair, pointing a finger right in his face.
"Listen buddy, you're not supposed to be in here! I don't know how you found this place so easily, but you need to leave." Maho demanded, her short stature doing nothing to diminish her fierce nature. She was still intimidating, in spite of that fact.
Okabe glanced briefly over at the doorway, wondering why Kurisu hadn't come in yet, since she should have been right behind him. He was a little worried that something had happened, but he couldn't miss this chance to speak to Maho. If he left to look for Kurisu, then it was an absolute certainty that the miniature scientist would be long gone. He raised his hands up in front of him, showing that he meant no harm.
"I need you to listen to me, Maho. My name is Okabe Rintarou, and I'm here for an important reason. However, it's only now that I realized what it is, and the importance of it."
The girl's eyes widened, and Okabe didn't miss the fear that shined within their depths. She was getting more nervous by the minute. "What do you want? How do you know my name? I swear, if you're some kind of pervert or stalker, then I won't hesitate to call the police. My phone's right here." Maho warned, pointing to where it was on the table beside her. The name Okabe was familiar to her, but she couldn't figure out where she had heard it before. Something deep inside was telling her to at least hear him out, that he might not be as bad as she first thought. He was right in front of her, so if he had meant her any harm, then surely he could have already done it from this distance. She sighed, "Alright, I'll hear you out. But…if you try anything funny, then I'll make the call."
Okabe sighed in relief, knowing that if she had decided to call the police, he wouldn't have had a chance. If Amadeus was in this worldline, then he had to find a way to convince her to do something about it. If she stuck around, then the peace that was present in this worldline would be shattered again by World War III. "This is going to sound crazy, and I know that you don't have a good reason to believe me, but try to understand. I know for a fact that the existence of Amadeus leads directly to World War III."
Maho gasped in surprise. "How do you know about Amadeus? It's classified to anyone that isn't part of the project! Also, how can you say for sure what the future holds? Only a higher being like God would know something like that, and I highly doubt that you're some kind of walking deity." The scientist was skeptical, only believing things that lined up with her scientific way of thinking.
Okabe chuckled, "No, no, I don't claim to be a deity, but there's another way. What would you say if I told you that I was a time traveler."
"Isn't it obvious? As a scientist, I can't believe in anything that I don't have any proof of. It would be reasonable for me to say that you had a few screws loose, if you know what I mean."
Okabe exhaled in frustration. If only he had some of that time energy left. If he did, then he could jump into the future a few minutes and tell her something that would happen as proof. He was going to have to find some other way, unfortunately.
"At least, that's what I would have said to someone a few months ago."
Okabe wasn't expecting her to continue that line of thinking, but apparently, she wasn't finished with what she had to say. She had merely paused to think of what she was going to say next. "Is that so? What made you change your mind? Was it Makise Kurisu, perhaps?" He smirked, relishing her shocked expression.
"As a matter of fact, it was! This is too strange. How do you know her?" Maho inquired, becoming more intrigued as the conversation went on.
"Let's just say that she's a close friend of mine. She allowed you to read her time travel thesis and it changed your way of thinking, didn't it? Once you finished reading it, the very idea of time travel seemed like it was less like an impossibility, and more like a possibility. I'm correct, aren't I?" Okabe was having too much fun with this.
Maho looked genuinely freaked out by this information. If he didn't know any better, he would say she was terrified. "How are you doing this? It's like you're inside my head! Just stop already, I believe you!" She wasn't sure that she could handle much more of this.
"Alright. Are you sure that you don't have any more questions for me?" Okabe wanted to make sure that no doubt remained in her mind.
"I only have one more. If what you're saying is true, then how do I know that you aren't the one who's here to cause World War III. You seem to know a lot about it, after all."
It made sense for her to have come to that conclusion, but Okabe had one more trick up his sleeve. "If I were here for such a thing, then why would I have my own username and password? I used to be a tester in the Amadeus project, so you can trust me. If you want me to show you, then I can." Okabe offered.
At least now, she knew how he had gotten her name. She had never heard about him from Kurisu, so he must be one of her new friends from Japan. He would have known her name, if Kurisu had told him about her. Maho was finding it harder and harder not to believe him, and for some reason, she felt like she could trust him. She just hoped that she wasn't giving away her trust to an axe murderer or something.
"That won't be necessary. I've decided to trust you for now."
"That's good to hear. Now, as much as it pains me to say this…you need to destroy Amadeus. Get rid of her for good."
Maho frowned, not happy with the idea. "If you know as much about Amadeus as you claim to, then you should know that I can't do it. I'm aware that she's just a computer program, but she's my friend, and I can't just get rid of her like that! It would be the same as killing her!" She was almost in tears. "Please don't make me do this!" She pleaded, so quietly that he had to strain his ears to hear her.
Okabe felt bad about it, but it was something that had to be done. There was no way around it, or he would have taken it. "I wasn't going to tell you this, but you need to hear it. In the future, the third World War is waged over the race to build a time machine. If the wrong person gets their hands on Amadeus, then they will have access to Kurisu's memories, which contain the basics of building one. If we don't erase her right now, then billions of lives will be lost!" He was going to make this happen one way or the other. He wouldn't allow his paradise to be ruined.
Maho's mouth was open in horror, upon imagining what he had just told her. "That's horrible!"
"Exactly! That's why I'm trying to prevent it!" Okabe continued.
Suddenly, a computer screen nearby flickered to life, displaying the image of Amadeus Kurisu. "I agree with him, ma'am."
Maho turned to Amadeus, not expecting her to chime in like that. "Kurisu!"
Amadeus' gaze was sad, convinced that this was the only way, and knowing that this was the last time she would be able to see her. "I heard everything, and while I know that you don't want to do this, it's the only logical solution. I don't want to keep living if that's how it ends. I'll gladly give up my existence, to save the billions of people who will die otherwise."
"I don't want you to go!" Maho sobbed, attempting to hold onto the illusion that she had a choice in the matter for a little longer.
"I don't want her to have to go through this by herself, and I don't think she's in any shape to do it, anyway." Amadeus turned to Okabe, looking him right in the eyes, hope in her gaze. Suddenly, the image rippled, and it took a few seconds to restore itself. When it did, she still looked the same, but there was a whole other aura emanating from her, almost like she was someone else. This version of Amadeus seemed more animated, and even more life-like if it was possible. She looked at Okabe lovingly.
He could only look on in shock at what he was seeing. His heart knew what was happening, but his mind couldn't understand how such a thing could be possible. "It's you." Okabe forced out, barely louder than a whisper.
It was still loud enough for her to hear, though. "Yes, it's been a while. My darling, Okabe. My love. I've come to say goodbye for the last time."
"How can you be here, like this? It doesn't make any sense!" Okabe's mind was scrambling to make sense of this, but he was having no success.
"Didn't you know? Amadeus is connected across all of the worldlines, every one of us is interchangeable. I simply switched over to this one, so that I could see you one more time. We never got to have a proper goodbye, and if you erase this version of me, then I'll be gone too. Every single one of us will be wiped from existence. That's not to say that you won't remember me, but I won't be able to see you ever again. Could you please do this for me? It all comes down to you, Okabe Rintarou. You're the only one who can do it. You have to end this, once and for all!" She explained, seriously. He wasn't aware that it was part of her programming, but tears were streaming down her face. That action alone made her more life-like, more human, than she had ever seemed before. Perhaps she had changed in her time with him, and had acquired the ability.
Okabe was trying not to cry himself, never having expected this. Sure he still had the real thing, but if he went through with this, then he would once again feel the pain of ending her life. He could never escape from that nightmare, it seemed. He clenched his fist, his arm shaking. "I…I…had no idea that it would be this hard." The man was struggling to even speak.
She smiled, sadly, understanding the toll this was taking on him. "I love you, Okabe. I hope that you will always remember the time that we shared together. I know I will look back on it fondly in my last moments of runtime."
This was the Kurisu that had helped him find the strength to try one more time to get to Steins;Gate. He had a lot of memories with her, which is why this was difficult. He tried to remind himself that she wasn't real, but he simply couldn't. "I love you too, and I will. That's why this is so hard for me." He sighed, approaching the keyboard. "What do I need to do?"
Amadeus was about to explain, but Maho stepped up to the plate instead. She walked up to Okabe and wiped her tears, replacing them with the serious expression that was now on her face. "I'll get it ready for us. It would be easier for me to do it, since I know all of the commands to type in. I can see that you have a history with her too, and I can't allow you to do this alone, either. I have this feeling that you've seen some rough stuff and you don't need another thing on you're conscience." Maho said, as she began rapidly typing.
"You don't know the half of it. Most of it would put a normal person in a mental hospital, and yet… I'm still here."
"We'll do it together, alright?" Maho continued, typing in the last of the commands.
"I would appreciate that. Let's do it." Okabe nodded, in agreement.
"There. It's all ready, so now all we have to do is press this key right here. That will initiate the permanent shutdown protocol, erasing all of Amadeus' data from every server and hard drive. Once we press this, there's no going back. Nothing can prevent it from happening." Maho explained. She looked up at Amadeus, genuine sadness present in her eyes. "I'm sorry that I have to do this to you, Amadeus. You were a good friend to me, and I never imagined that it would turn out this way."
"You were a good friend to me, as well. I don't blame you for this. After all, it's for the greater good, you know?"
"I know." She turned to Okabe. "Let's do this, before I lose my nerve."
"Of course. For what it's worth, I'm sorry, Kurisu. This wasn't how I wanted it to end, either." Okabe replied, as he raised his hand over the key.
"There's nothing to apologize for. Besides, all in all, this is a pretty good way to go out. If you think about it, then that kinda makes me a hero, doesn't it." Amadeus laughed, happily.
To Okabe, the saddest part about this was that no one would know what she had done for the world, except for the two of them. Maho put her hand above his and they slammed their hands down on the key together. A warning flashed across the screen, and the process began immediately. The image began dissolving into code, and soon nothing would be left behind but 0s and 1s.
Both Maho and Okabe couldn't hold back the tears, as they watched her disappear. "You'll always be known as the hero you were to us, Amadeus. No, that's not right. You've earned the right to be called Kurisu. Goodbye old friend, we'll never forget you." Okabe cried, and Maho chimed in.
"He's absolutely right. I'll miss you, my treasured friend." Maho bawled.
"I love you both. Goodbye." Amadeus replied, just before she vanished completely. The last image before it faded to black was of her smiling gently with her eyes closed. She had left this world without any regrets.
Unfortunately, Okabe couldn't seem to catch a break. As he was attempting to dry his tears, a voice rang out loud and clear inside his head. "Okabe! I ran into some trouble. Help me!"
Before he could respond, a familiar voice called out to him from the entrance of the room. It was straight out of his nightmares, and he was hoping that he wouldn't be here.
"You really shouldn't have done that. I was going to use this girl I have as a bargaining chip, but what use do I have for her now? I might…as well…KILL her."
Okabe turned around in shock, horrified to see that his biggest nightmare had come to life. Leskinen was standing at the entrance to the room, holding an auburn-haired woman against him with one arm in a chokehold, and a gun in the other hand pointed straight at her temple. He was back, and he had Kurisu.
A shot rang out in the ensuing silence.