Why Did You Let Her Go Outside?
As soon as she left the room she knew it was a bad idea. Immediately hugging herself as she walked. Every step she took allowed she allowed herself to feel more vulnerable. She wanted to be near Quinn. She wanted to let her help her, but the blonde had already done so much. She got to the elevator and waited for it to arrive, stepping inside and watching the doors close in on her. She took a deep breath, scrunching her eyes closed momentarily as she felt the floors pass by her. She reached the lobby only taking one step before she saw some people she recognised. Tina, Mercedes and Lauren were coming out of the lounge, obviously making their way up to their room. 'Hey, Santana.' Tina saw her first, all three girls making their way towards her as she wrapped her arms around her body.
'Hey,' she smiled at them, not really meeting their eyes but looking vaguely at them.
'Are you okay?' Lauren asked upon seeing the Latina's tired face.
'Fine.' She lied, her feet moving around under her as she desperately wanted to be anywhere else.
'So, where's Quinn?' Mercedes wondered, trying to figure out what Santana was doing.
'She's upstairs. I wanted to let her sleep, you know, without anything disturbing her.'
'Right, but what are you going to do?'
'Look, I was just going for a walk. You guys don't need to play twenty questions with me. I'm fine.' Santana looked Mercedes in the eyes. And then she could see how tired Santana truly was. Her eyes red and bloodshot, bags formed under them both and her face seemed stained with all of e tears she had cried. 'Please don't look at me like that.' Santana pleaded, looking away trying to hide her face.
'Sorry.' Mercedes looked away too, the other girls looking more and more awkward until Santana decided to end the conversation.
'Goodnight guys.' She said finally, before walking towards the hotel doors. She said she wouldn't go outside, but she had to, didn't she? The anniversary was the perfect time to face her fear dead on. What better way to do that than by walking around the streets of New York at night.
'Goodnight,' Lauren mumbled back as they watched her walk away and out of the hotel.
'Should she be out there alone?' Tina wondered aloud.
'I don't know but I think we need to tell Quinn.' Mercedes decided, heading to the elevator with the other two girls following.
'Santana's going to be pissed if she finds out.'
'I know, Tina, but what are we supposed to do?'
'Yeah, I agree. She shouldn't be alone.' Lauren pressed the buttons for the thirteenth floor and they headed up to see Quinn.
It was a cold night again. Santana was just relieved that she grabbed her jacket as she walked out of the room. Walking along the street she realised how full it still was. People walking with loved ones, groups of friends out for the night. So if there was this many people, why did she still feel afraid? She stuffed her hands in her pockets and headed the same way they went when Mr Schu took them out. But this time, she was determined to make it all the way to the restaurant. She needed to prove to herself that she could do it. That she didn't need Quinn or Brittany or anyone for that matter. She could take care of herself. She also needed to get a handle on everything, not flipping out every time someone touched her or a loud noise came on suddenly. She needed to get over this.
Mercedes was knocking on the door. 'Quinn,' she called, figuring the blonde was sound asleep so she knocked louder. 'Quinn.' A moment later the door shot open.
'What is it?' She said groggily, wiping the sleep from her eyes.
'Erm, we thought we should tell you...' Tina drifted off.
'What? Guys come on, I'm tired.'
'We know Q, but it's Santana.' The mention of Santana definitely woke her up, eyes more alert as she scanned the girls faces.
'What about Santana? Is she okay?' Quinn stepped forwards.
'Yeah, well we think so. We saw her downstairs and she said she was going for a walk, outside.' Lauren added.
'What!' Quinn ran back into the room, grabbing her phone and a jacket after slipping on some jeans. 'Why did you let her go outside!'
'Quinn calm down. She seemed okay.'
'But she isn't okay Mercedes, far from it. She shouldn't be out there alone. Not today.' Quinn scowled at them as she brushed past them and into the hall.
'Q, we're sorry we didn't...'
'Tina, it's okay, I shouldn't be shouting at you guys. But right now I need to go and find her.' Quinn smiled before walking away down the hall.
'Okay, but we're coming too.' Mercedes called as all three girls caught up with the blonde. They headed for the elevator and then down to the lobby. Worry burning inside Quinn the entire time. She knew she should never have let Santana go alone.