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CHAPTER 36

Tony smiled as did Jack. "Yeah, thanks. It means a lot to me to know you have my back."

Gibbs smiled at Tony, "Back, front and sides. I'm going to watch your six and be by your side through all of this. We are stronger together. We are the only team we need. If we can't work things out with them, they go. It's no longer my way or the highway Tony. It's our road and we will pave the way."

"I'd like that a lot. I think I'm done with the frat boy act. It was fun to mess with Kate and then Tim came around and I had to continue it. But Ziva is a different story all together. I don't trust her. She has her own agenda and I just can't get pass the whole providing intel for Ari. Boss, she looked into our past and used what she learned to teach Ari how to hurt us.'

Gibbs shook his head. For whatever reason he hadn't looked at it like that at all. He had only looked at it as an assignment she performed for Mossad. Now, now he looked at it through Tony's eyes and was shocked at how he felt about it. Ziva's intel was the cause of Abby being shot at and Kate being killed. It was her discovery of Shannon and Kelly that paved the way for Ari to target the women in his life. His anger was growing as he thought about it. How could I even think to give her a break, to give her a chance when it was her that got Kate killed. Did she know what I thought of Tony? Would she have gone after him as well?

"Gibbs…Gibbs…Dad! Are you okay? 'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you. 'm sorry." Tony thought he was the cause of Gibbs rising anger. He hadn't wanted to bring up bad memories. He hadn't wanted to hurt Gibbs. He was simply trying to explain why he felt the way he did.

Gibbs shook himself. "How in the hell was I able to over look that fact? My God, I've put you all in danger because I gave her credit for killing Ari."

Tony reached a hand across the table to grab Gibbs hand. "Don't blame yourself. You were in a bad way. Grief over Kate's death. Your fear for who was going to be next. Ziva knowing about Shannon and Kelly couldn't have been easy. It had to bring up old feelings. I don't blame you for any of that, it wasn't your fault. If anyone else is to blame it's Sheppard. She had an allegiance with Ziva. SHE put Ziva on the team. SHE is the one who overlooked Ziva's inappropriate, unprofessional and traitorous behavior."

"I should have fought harder against having her on the team. I… I shouldn't have looked pass what she did to help Ari." Gibbs couldn't stand to sit any more. He stood and turned as if to leave the kitchen but Tony stopped him.

"Please, don't walk away. We need to deal with this together. You said we would, so please don't…" Tony was again concerned he had messed up by telling Gibbs how he felt.

"I'm not going anywhere. I just…need to move. How could…" Tony interrupted him. "YOU didn't do anything wrong. We were all in a bad way after Kate. Between the nightmares, the pressure to get Ari, worrying about our friends and just everything…we weren't in a position to really look at anything with open eyes. We took Sheppard at her word. SHE brought Ziva to us and neither of them were forthcoming about her affiliation with the Director of Mossad or her brother Ari. THEY lied to US. THEY put us in a position to be harmed. Ziva brought up stuff to me the first time I met her. She told me where I went to school, who my parents were…I was waiting for her to blurt out that I was abused for years. But it didn't even occur to me at that moment that she had gathered intel on me. I never asked how or why she knew what she knew. My distrust of her developed over the first few weeks. After I was more grounded about Kate, I started to think about everything and then it hit me. I just couldn't really wrap my head around it but I started to watch. I watched how she interacted with you, Tim and everyone else. She puts up a front and shows what she wants you to see. That's something I recognize because it's how I do things. I do it to protect myself, she's not trying to protect anyone."

Jackson reached over and wrapped his arm around Tony's shoulders. Tony leaned into it as he tried to get his breathing under control. Gibbs looked to Tony and knew he couldn't walk away even if just to the back yard. He pulled the table away. He didn't want to separate his dad and Tony. Once the table was moved he reached up to hug Tony. He needed to show his love and support.

"It's okay Tony, just breathe. We'll work through this. I'm not angry with you. I'm angry with Jen, Ziva and myself. I think we have to make a decision and as far as I am concerned it's pretty clear." Tony looked up into Gibbs' eyes. He knew he would never be able to trust Ziva. He didn't trust her on a personal level but that wasn't surprising. What he couldn't handle was the fact he couldn't trust her on a professional level. He didn't trust her to have his back.

"Tony if you agree, we will start looking for a new team member. Jen will have to deal with it. I think we've all been through enough. It's time we start taking care of ourselves. It's time I start taking care of you."

"I don't think I could ever learn to trust her. At least with Sheppard I don't have to worry about her having my six in the field." Tony felt as if a weight was beginning to lift from him.

Gibbs grabbed his list and put an "X" through Ziva. He oddly felt at peace doing this. Change was going to come to this team and this agency. He was going to protect his people. He wasn't going to let anyone get in his way of doing it. If Jen gave him any crap about it he was prepared to go to Sec Nav and tell him Jen had hidden the identity and mission of Miss Mossad.

"Why don't we take a little break. I could use another cup of coffee." Gibbs smiled as he said it. Tony laughed, "You and your addiction. God help us all if there is ever a coffee shortage in the house."

Gibbs put his hand to his chest and gasped. "Just the thought makes me sick." They all laughed. It was a much needed break from the seriousness of their discussion.

Tony had moved to the couch and Jackson had started a movie. Relaxing for the first time in a long time Tony was able to fall asleep after taking his medications. Gibbs watched as Tony slept peacefully for the first time in ages.

"You're doing good son. Keep it up. It seems this is something you are both needing." Jackson had sat by quietly during the previous discussion. He was proud of his son for standing up for Tony against everyone. But he was more proud to see him admit to a shortcoming and work towards fixing it.

"Thanks dad, for everything. I think we are headed in the right direction."

There was nothing more to be said. There was a lot of work ahead of them and they both knew it. Tony was going to need the strength of his friends and family to weather this storm. Gibbs was willing to admit he too was going to need their strength.