My sincerest thanks to everyone who read and reviewed last chapter! I really appreciated the encouragement, especially given what I was going through last week. No worries...I discovered that the threat of my story being "in violation" was a total lie, and this story won't get pulled after all! Thanks so much to everyone who supported me during that scare. Special thanks to my special friend, Miss Chocolat, for calming me down.

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or anything else in this story, except for the ideas behind rinku.

Chapter 36 posted 7/2/2011

Beginning to Heal

Humming…

There was a periodic humming. It was a gentle sound, very non-intrusive. Then there was the intermittent beep…high-pitched and brief. It seemed to harmonize well with the affable strumming.

But with time this melodious ballad grew somewhat irritating.

Suction…constant suction of air. The incessant wheezing of the respirator was becoming maddening. Push and pull, push and pull, up and down. This annoying tedium was only rivaled by the intermittent screeches of the electrocardiogram. It was strident…and just as she began to tune out the rasping of the respirator, the shrill shriek pierced her senses, making her aware of the sounds once again.

Her exasperation and frustration drew her closer and closer to consciousness, and she began to notice other things. The area around her nose felt warm and humid, almost sticky. The air contained the feint scent of plastic.

She felt a dull pain reverberate through her body. It was too widespread to localize the injured areas…she just hurt. It was bearable though. A dampened sensation compared to the maelstrom of agony that whipped through her body the last time she was conscious.

As she tried to numb her mind to the pain, she sensed a quiet energy somewhere in the room. It did not seem threatening to her, but she was hesitant to trust her instincts. What would greet her eyes once she awakened was a complete mystery to her. She could not recall facts at this point, only feelings. Apart from pain, the only other sensation that stuck out to her was that of foreboding and dread.

Did she really want to wake up?

There was another feeling somewhere there, though. A positive one entering her recollection. It was soothing, peaceful…and so warm.

Right…it was the last thing she felt before finding herself in this bed. A quiet calm and rousing hope.

Perhaps she shouldn't reject this new presence after all.

As she focused on the unknown signature, something about it seemed familiar. It was electrifying and strong…carefree yet purposeful. Most of all, it was reassuring…it made her feel secure, protected. Like no more bad things were going to happen to her if she opened her eyes.

Maybe it really was safe to wake up…

Slowly she lifted her heavy eyelids. It felt like an eternity since she used these muscles. As her evergreen irises became exposed to the natural light of the room, a blur of orange entered her field of vision. Just as it appeared, the figure vanished from view and resurfaced moments later with another paler blob.

An orb of light shun into her eyes, causing her to wince. Did she really just battle to regain consciousness only to be blinded by her welcomers?

The flashlight's beam clicked off soon afterwards. Then the colorful shadows began to speak.

"Sakura…Sakura can you hear me? Do know who I am?"

It was a woman's voice. Her tone was stern, yet concerned. The sound stirred something in her memory…if only she could connect the voice to the face.

"Is Sakura-chan gonna be ok? Well is she? Is she? Come on, baa-chan."

"Will you keep quiet?" snapped the woman.

The corner of the girl's mouth contracted into a small smile, although she doubted the figures could see it beneath her breathing mask. The amusingly annoying boy sparked something in her recollection, clarity returning to her eyesight as well. Of course she knew who these people were. And that meant she knew where she was, as well.

She had made it home.

"N-Na…N-Naruto…?"

The two blondes, who had just been glaring at each other, immediately turned to the injured girl below them. Naruto held onto his teammate's bandaged left hand, squeezing it gently.

"I'm here, Sakura-chan," he said softly. "You're safe now, don't you worry."

Sakura mumbled something, but the blonde cocked his head to the side in response. "Baa-chan, can't we move this mask already? I can't understand a thing she's saying."

"I need to ensure it is safe for her first," answered the medic, a hint of irritation in her voice. "Sakura," she said kindly, "do you think you're strong enough to breathe on your own now?"

Sakura nodded weakly. Tsunade unfastened the strap behind the girl's head and lifted the plastic mask off her face, clicking the breathers off as well. Sakura wheezed slightly as she took a deep breath on her own.

"There 'ya go," said Naruto heartedly. "Now doesn't that feel loads better?" He gave her a bright smile.

She reciprocated as best she could and made an attempt to sit up, which she later regretted. Just as her muscles contracted, her abdomen exploded with a burning pain. Her arms were completely useless to support her as she plopped onto her back, the area stinging slightly on impact.

"Sakura-chan!"

"You shouldn't get up, Sakura," said Tsunade firmly. "Your body is not nearly strong enough to handle movement just yet. Here…" The sannin clicked a button on the side of the bed, causing the front of the cot to arch forward so that Sakura was now in a sitting position.

"Th-thank you," she rasped, her voice lacking use for some time. But exactly how much time had passed? "How long have I been asleep? What happened?"

"You've been unconscious for a little over two weeks now," answered Tsunade gravely. "And as for your last question…we had hoped you could be the one to tell us." Sakura looked at the woman questioningly. "You're the only person who can tell us what exactly went on in that forest."

"Y-Yeah, Sakura-chan," said Naruto, apprehensive and uncharacteristically somber. "All we know is one minute, me, Sasuke and Ino were kickin' these six ninjas' butts, a-and the next we heard this huge explosion in the forest. It sounded like a huge paper bomb went off or something. It took us a while, but we finally beat those ninja and tracked down where everything was going on. A-And when we did…we…we…" Naruto clenched his fist tightly, his body shaking with suppressed fury. "Then we find this creep running a sword through you…"

The blonde paused and took a deep, calming breath to regain his composure. It irked him to no end as he recalled the sight he saw when he came to Sakura's aid. Her body was broken, mangled. His sweet teammate did not deserve such treatment. But his anger at the atrocity done to her did not compare to his fury with himself. He was supposed to protect her. Always. But instead…

The boy inhaled his last bracing breath before he continued, his expression temperate once again. "You were so beaten up, Sakura-chan. I-I got so scared. Then me 'n Sasuke took out that Aoi guy with my rasengan, but Sasuke got really hurt too. And we couldn't move you, so we sent Ino for help. She found Hinata on the way to the village, and the medical core brought you and Hinata back here."

Sakura took in the information. "And Hinata's okay? A-And Sasuke?"

"It took a day to pump the sedatives out of her system, but Hinata is doing just fine," said Tsunade reassuringly. "Sasuke has also made a full recovery; a few days' rest in the hospital was all he needed. But what we'd like to know now is what happened to you."

Sakura lowered her eyes, shifting her gaze away from her onlookers and towards the window on her left. There was a steady stream of golden rays sparkling through the glass. It must have been mid-morning, she guessed. "What happened…to me…"

Her memories before she lost consciousness were currently so hazy, and she struggled with herself to recall everything that had taken place. The thoughts containing the information she needed felt so sparsely scattered within her mind, close yet far away…like every time she came close to grasping one it vaporized into nothingness.

Naruto's cerulean eyes watched his teammate with concern, sympathy etched in every feature of his face. He reached for her hand once again, but was interrupted, "Saku-"

"C-Could you tell me the extent of the damage?" asked Sakura hesitantly. "I mean…e-exactly how badly hurt am I?"

"Sakura-chan," said Naruto, "a-are you sure you're ready to take all this in? I mean…" His voice trailed off, his expression indicating that perhaps he was the one who was not prepared to get a full account of Sakura's injuries.

The battered kunoichi tore her eyes away from the window to her teammate and the Hokage. "I need to hear this. I…want to remember. I-I need to…" She did not like the idea of having such splotchy gaps in her memory. It made her feel uneasy, even if her instincts told her that this knowledge would do her wellbeing more harm than good.

Naruto nodded weakly in defeat while the medic folded her arms and frowned, her expression grim. "You were in really bad shape, Sakura…it's a real miracle you survived. You have your healing ability to thank for that, I am certain. Your left cheek was burned…"

A fiery punch flashed across her mind.

"…but it's healing nicely so long as we keep it bandaged. Your 3rd and 4th ribs were broken…"

A loud gut-wrenching crack accompanying a kick to her chest. Sakura gritted her teeth.

"…but we were able to reduce it to a fracture. We found gashes on your back and left arm…"

Glass…a wind-enhanced blade…whipping. Her bandaged left arm stung as she fruitlessly clutched at the sheets.

"…which became infected but we were able to fight off the infections and the flesh has regenerated completely." Tsunade paused as she assessed Sakura's countenance and continued, inhaling deeply. It was almost like this recounting was hurting her as well, although her voice did not betray this as she adopted the detached tone of a well-experienced medic. "Your hands, however, are a different story. You sustained third degree burns on both, but we've been able to restore most of the burnt tissue."

An approaching blast of lightning shooting towards her.

"You will require a couple more healing sessions before you find you can move them with relatively little pain. The same thing goes for where your thigh and abdomen were impaled."

A deeply embedded kunai, and a yellow-masked ruthless rogue with a sword.

"Most of your skeletal muscle tissue sustained damage from what looked like a high voltage electric shock."

A terrible surge of electricity. Her body shivered.

"You will therefore find some soreness and muscle weakness, and you'll need therapy to completely regain your muscle tone. As for your right forearm…"

A slender hand roughly grasping her own. Sakura's eyes widened in recollection.

"… your radius and ulna were snapped completely in two, but we have been able to reduce the break to a fracture-…Sakura?"

Tears were rolling silently down her expressionless face, her breathing rate resetting to a quicker, more panicked pace. "Sakura-chan!" called Naurto with concern. "Sakura-chan, you all right?" The boy felt beyond helpless as he stepped backwards and watched one of his closest friends crumbling under the weight of her resurfaced memories.

Tsunade pressed her index and middle fingers on Sakura's forehead, the digits humming with the steady flow of green glowing chakra. The girl closed her eyes, forcing the last of her tears away as she allowed the feelings of calmness that begged for entrance to spill through her. Her lungs quieted to their usual rhythm of inhalation once again, and Sakura re-opened her eyes. "Better?" asked the medic.

Sakura's gaze strayed to her lap. That was the extent of her response.

Naruto stepped toward her but said nothing. He bit back his lower lip, struggling to suppress the emotions that threatened to explode within him. He had to remain calm…for Sakura's sake. Tsunade's outward calmness was a lot less strained as she narrowed her eyes, assessing the girl the way a medic of her caliber would. She got a panic-attack that severe just from recalling the incidents in the forest. Sakura…just what exactly were you put through back there?

"Naruto," began Tsunade, her eyes still on the kunoichi, "please go and alert Sasuke of Sakura's wakening. I'm certain he would like to hear the good news."

"R-Right…I'm on it." The blonde spared his teammate one last look before exiting the room, shutting the door quietly behind him.

There was silence.

"Sakura…"

The girl continued to stare at her lap.

"Sakura…are you all right?"

The girl inhaled a bracing breath. "I'm fine," she responded unconvincingly. "…or at least…I will be fine…eventually." She continued to avert her gaze from the sannin, preferring the whiteness of her hospital sheets instead.

"I know this may be a bit difficult," began Tsunade, her voice as empathetic as her short temper would permit, "but I need to know what happened on your last mission. The safety of the village might depend on it."

Sakura slowly turned her head towards her left and away from Tsunade, her eyes focusing on three small blue birds chirping happily at the windowsill. Taking a momentary pause to sift through her tangled ball of memories, she began. "The mission was a fake. There was no stolen scroll. The real client was the one who orchestrated all this. And…and it was my fault that she was able to do it."

One of the blue birds at the sill hopped away from its group and glided toward a branch on a neighboring tree outside the window. "Hm…yes Ino did inform me that you all had split up. I don't think I need to tell you why that was a mistake, Sakura."

The chuunin gritted her teeth, fighting back her tears of guilt. "I overestimated our abilities, taking the fact that it was only a D-ranked mission that erring on the side of extreme caution wasn't necessary." Her words of admitted failure burned in her throat as she spoke. Her inadequacies nearly cost her friends their lives, after all.

"We're just a band of rookie ninja," she continued. "There are many shinobi out there much more powerful than we are. I assumed all my plans would work flawlessly, and I didn't account for unexpected occurrences." The solitary bird sitting on the tree branch suddenly dashed from view, just missing the claws of a pouncing orange cat. "I…I was a terrible captain…" she whispered.

Tsunade sighed, placing a hand which Sakura could not see on her hip. "Admittedly, you were a bit reckless. Team leaders must always account for uncertainty, and balance between caution and action. But you are still young, Sakura. Learn from your experiences and move on. There is a reason you were promoted to chuunin. Your powers of analysis must not be put to waste. Otherwise, you will be selfishly jeopardizing your teammates, not helping them"

Sakura winced at the Hokage's words and somewhat harsh tone. Despite the fact that Sakura knew this was necessary, a scolding was the last thing her declining self-esteem needed. And what was worse, she was being reprimanded by the same woman which a corner of her mind screamed at her to resent.

Tsunade must have known all about Sakura's family roots, and had hidden it from her deliberately. She was family, yet had shown no inclination to treat the orphaned girl differently from any other ninja in the Hidden Leaf. She was the last family Sakura knew existed. The fact that Tsunade felt no inkling to even attempt to fill the void in her heart from her parents' continuously missed presence made her feel a little hurt, a little betrayed, a little rejected…and a little upset.

"I understand, Hokage-sama," she muttered dispassionately. "Shall I continue?"

Tsunade removed her hand from her hip. "Please."

"After Hinata and I extracted the scroll from the enemy, we were ambushed and I found myself in the enemy's safe house. Hinata was unconscious. I later managed to escape and made it part of the way home while supporting her. When we got far enough, I left her with a water clone to get her as far away from the enemy as possible while I stalled them. This…" Sakura looked her injuries over. "…was the result."

"Hmm," replied Tsunade, a pensive finger on her chin. "And were you able to determine the enemy's motives?"

Sakura's face hardened in response to this question, her eyes returning to her lap. "They were after…one of us; badly enough that they sent an agent to Hoshi-hime's party to confirm that we were there and on our way to the next mission. I recognized one of the ninja who had captured us was also at Hoshi-hime's party." Sakura recalled the presence of Idate at both events.

"I see," answered Tsunade, in a hushed tone. "This is quite disturbing. It implies that these ninja must have connections in the Hidden Leaf."

"They most likely have connections in other lands…Hokage-sama," commented Sakura. "I have a feeling these rogues even knew about the surprise attack on Hideyoshi-hanshu's estate as well." The eerie warning of an impending attack which Idate had given her during the dance they shared at the party appeared in Sakura's mind. "…but I can't say for certain."

"Yes…that's quite disturbing indeed. These ninja must be more powerful and organized than I thought. And who exactly were they after?" inquired Tsunade. "The Byakugan?" Sakura shook her head but said nothing. "Then that only leaves…" The blonde sannin allowed her voice to fade as she pondered this, eyeing Sakura with both awe and concern.

The girl refused to meet the woman's gaze, her lowered eyes holding no emotion, only defeat.

"Sakura," said Tsunade, both softness and gravity interspersed within her tone, "why were they after you? Can you tell me anything about the enemy? Anything at all? Were they in cahoots with Orochimaru?"

"I…I don't know. I don't think so. She…she just said she wanted me," admitted Sakura, almost shamefully. "She believes I have special abilities that she's interested in. She didn't tell me why…"

"She?"

Sakura nodded. "Most of those ninja were in masks, but I can describe two of them. One was a boy about my age named Idate – brown hair and dark eyes. The other…a woman…she was tall, slender, white hair and sky-blue eyes. She said her name…was Kagura."

For the first time since they were speaking, Sakura shifted her eyes towards the Hokage, evaluating her first impressions on hearing the woman's name. Tsunade's expression remained impassive, however Sakura could tell her posture had stiffened some.

"I see," she answered, her eyes cast to the side as she was lost in thought.

"Ts-Tsunade-sama…" began Sakura. She observed the sannin wearily for a moment, her lips parting to speak but her voice hesitating to produce any sound. "…you don't happen to know who-"

"I will require more specific details from you of your encounter," she interrupted, shifting toward the exit. "But after your recovery."

Sakura's eyes glistened with slowly forming tears as Tsunade began to make her way to the door. I should have known…even now, she won't tell me. She won't even admit to what she knows. Doesn't she understand how much it's killing me not knowing everything? Sakura bit her lip. I-I wasn't expecting a dramatic proclamation, but some information would have been nice. Even some indication that she actually cared…a hug…a pat on the shoulder…a touch of the hand…anything…

"I have assigned Shizune to see to your healing sessions personally," she continued, opening the room door. "Get some rest and take things easy, all right? You've been through too much physically to allow yourself to become affected emotionally as well. You are safe from her here, remember that."

The Hokage's gaze unknowingly lingered on Sakura's averted one before she took the final step out of the space and closed the door gently behind her.

Sakura gave a pitiful sniff, holding back the torrent of tears she was on the brink of shedding. She turned back to the window on her left. I hate this…it hurts…it hurts so much not knowing. A madwoman is after me, and I don't even understand why. The petal-haired kunoichi gritted her teeth in anguish as she dimly remembered something about Kagura having attempted to capture her as a child.

If I had succeeded in snatching you away when you were still a baby, I would have been able to prevent your parents from corrupting you with this love and friendship nonsense…

And mom got in the way of that…b-but how? She straightened at this thought. Did Mom know Kagura before? Is that how she knows so much about my parentage? Did Mom tell her? Who is this Kagura person anyway? And why is Mom involved? Why is there so much I don't know about my own family? She punched the mattress with her unbroken left forearm in frustration. Her arm continued to give an unpleasant throb as she continued to press her injured flesh into the cot to spite herself and her weaknesses.

She was lost.

She had no answers to the questions that burnt within her and created a smoky haze over the vision of her family. She had not known of the implications of her Haruno blood before Tsunade had briefly explained it to her weeks ago. And now she finds that there was also an entire facet of her mother's line that she had never even known existed. She shuddered at the thought of what else lay before her that was unknowingly unknown as well.

She was incompetent.

Her recklessness and lack of experience nearly led to the deaths of her dearest friends. Had Naruto and Sasuke not been as capable as they were, they along with Ino and Hinata would have surely been dead. And she…she would have awakened in some dank place, a prisoner indefinitely.

She was afraid.

The persistent sting of her right arm reminded her of the sinister chakra Kagura had poured into her body on that day. What had been the woman's intent for that? She glanced at the area, the skin that lay beneath concealed by medical tape. She shook her head, as if trying to also shake off the fear that was ebbing its way into her consciousness.

She was…alone.

Tsunade, the last living relative she probably had, had abandoned her. Was she that undeserving of the answers that might quell the storm of unsettling thoughts that plagued her trouble-laden mind? She had just barely turned fourteen years old; she was a child. Were children not still entitled to some kind of parental protection and guidance? Had she not suffered enough in life on her own to have someone, someone, ease her burdened heart just once? Just this once?

No…she mentally answered herself bitterly. Why should this be any different from what I've faced before? I'm alone…I've always been alone…and I always will be…

The quiet opening of a door interrupted her thoughts. She did not turn to see who her visitors were, but as they slowly walked in she recognized the two all-too-familiar chakra signatures that alerted her to their presence.

"Sasuke…Naruto…" Her voice was quiet and uncharacteristically lackluster, and the boys could feel the defeat etched into every syllable of their names. They froze in place as they awaited her to speak. "Listen," she continued in that same dreary tone which intensified their worry for her. "I…appreciate your coming here to see me and everything but I…I just need…some…time…okay? You…understand what I mean…right?"

Her teammates looked at each other knowingly, although this was missed by Sakura who still had her gaze fixed outside the window. "Yeah…" answered Naruto just as quietly. "We get it…"

The door had shut softly, however to Sakura's surprise she subsequently heard two pairs of footsteps make their way around her bed. Orange and blue crossed her field of vision in front the window before they settled into the two chairs that stood at her bedside on her left. The kunoichi curiously turned to her best friends, who were currently also looking out the window. "Guys…? What are you-"

"You said you needed time," Sasuke interjected, his onyx eyes not shifting from the window.

"…you never said anything about needing space too," continued Naruto, turning to face Sakura's bewildered emerald with his radiant cerulean eyes as he gave a good-natured grin.

Sakura blinked back in astonishment, then lowered her head to her lap. She stared at her sheets for a moment before a small smile graced her lips. What on earth was I thinking…as if these two would ever leave me alone? She turned back to her teammates, both of whom were looking out the window. The three little blue birds from earlier had rejoined at the windowsill and were singing happily and harmoniously together.

Naruto…Sasuke…thank you…

There won't be too much action going on over the next few chapters, not with our heroine all broken like this...just giving you all fair warning. All the characters have been through quite a bit over the last few chapters, and of course that means exploring some more character development! Yay! I'm also going to flex my fluff muscles and try to give you guys a bit of romance as well. This is new territory for me though. And I am absolutely terrified.

A few comments...

The fight between Naruto, Sasuke and Aoi is pretty much identical to what happened in the fillers of the anime. I'm referring to the mission in the Land of Tea. For those unfamiliar, all you need to know is that Sasuke weakened the "Sword of the Thunder God" with his chidori, but then got hurt real bad. And Naruto finished him off with his rasengan, shattering the sword in the process.

IMPOTRANT NOTICE: I am in the process of re-writing my earlier chapters, particularly Chapters 1 through 21. This unfortunately means that I probably won't be able to update this with new material for...a good while. I'm so sorry everyone, but this is just something I really want to do. There won't be any major changes to the plot, so you do not need to read my re-writes if you don't want to (although I strongly encourage it...they are so gonna rock!). Major changes will involve chracaterization and writing style. Basically, I need to make the beginning more believable.

If anyone has ideas they'd like to share on where I fell short in my earlier chapters (particularly chapters 1 to 21 since I view those as my worst work), please PM me. I've got some ideas of my own, but I'd really love to hear your take on what might need adjusting. Thanks!

I hope you enjoyed this chapter! (I'm silently wondering if anyone picked up on my metaphoric imagery with the three little blue birds.) Your thoughts on my update would be much appreciated!