Chapter 36

Leonard came back to the table with a very troubled expression on his face, that worried Penny.

"Honey, what is wrong?" Penny asked in concern.

"Alex is in the hospital, we need to go there." Leonard responded

"What happened!" Penny asked in shock

"I don't know, we need to go see her and find out." Leonard told her with a concerned look on his face.

Leonard paid the bill, giving the waiter a generous tip, for helping Leonard get a cab and telling the cab driver where to take them.

Dr Glauser was sitting, on one of the hallway chairs, when he heard the elevator chime and saw Dr Hofstadter and a beautiful young blonde women come out and walk over to him.

"Dr Glauser, what happened to Alex? Is she alright?" were the first words out of Leonard's mouth, when he got within speaking distance of Dr Glauser.

"Dr Hofstadter, Dr Jensen is going to be fine, she is resting in the room over there, so there is no worry." Dr Glauser said with a smile.

Leonard visibly relaxed and took a breathe, "What happened, sir?"

"Dr Jensen was walking to a restaurant, close to the Hostel, when three juvenile thugs tried to steal her purse. They knocked her over and she cut her head, she has stitches. A nice young couple chased off the thugs, and helped her, but she had blood all over her face and clothes, from her head, so they call Hospital, so she is here now." Dr Glauser explained in a little bit broken English.

A doctor came out of Alex's room just then and Dr Glauser said something in French, to him, which lead to a short conversation. They talked for a couple of minutes and Dr Glauser pointed to Leonard, the doctor nodded, then walked up to Leonard.

"Hello, I'm Dr Jensen's doctor, are you her American friend?" the doctor asked

Leonard nodded, "Yes, I'm Dr Hofstadter, her associate and friend."

The doctor smiled and nodded, "She is doing very good, she cut her head, and we don't see any head injury, but she needed 5 stitches. We think she will not have any problems, however, when people have head injuries, we like to keep them overnight. You can come by tomorrow and pick her up, OK."

"Can I see her?" Leonard asked

"Yes, for a little while, we gave her medicine to let her sleep." the doctor smiled and walked off.

Leonard looked at Penny, "I need to see she is alright."

Penny smiled, "Go see her, I'll wait here for you."

Penny sat with Dr Glauser while Leonard went to Alex's room. When Leonard walked in, he wasn't prepared for the scene he saw, Alex laid in the bed, staring at nothing, with a gauze bandage wrapped around her head, looking fragile, pale and lost. He walked over to her and as he got closer he could see her eyes were red, she had been crying.

"Alex," Leonard said gently to her

Alex turned her head, and looked at him for a couple of seconds, "Leonard," she then started breathing heavily, he thought she was about to cry.

"Alex, how are you feeling?" Leonard walked up to the side of the bed and took her hand. He knew touching Penny when she was upset, helped her, so he hoped it would do the same with Alex.

Leonard's touch did make Alex feel better, "My head hurts a little. Leonard they knocked me down, I didn't know what was happening, I was so scared. I was just hungry and I was going to the restaurant. Why did they do that?"

Leonard didn't know what to say, why did one person hurt another person, in criminal activities. This was all his fault, he shouldn't have left her alone, "I don't know Alex, they were just bad people. It's over now, you need to rest."

"Leonard, I want to go home." Alex's said

"Alex, you have to stay the night, but they said you can come home tomorrow." Leonard tried to assure her.

"No Leonard, I want to go home, back to California." Alex eyes were pleading

Leonard, felt so bad for her, he decided he would make that happened, the way she looked he didn't want her to suffer anymore, "Ok Alex, as long as the Doctor says it's Ok, we'll try and get you on a plane for home, Saturday, alright?"

"Thank you Leonard," she sighed, "I'm tired, can you sit with me a little," Alex asked

"Of course Alex," Leonard pulled up a chair near her bed and sat with her, holding her hand, as she closed her eyes. 5-minutes later, she was breathing steady and regular, she was asleep. Leonard gently removed his had from hers, laying her hand on her stomach, then he left her room.

Penny had been talking with Dr Glauser, he was a nice man, when she saw Leonard walk out of Alex's room. He looked really troubled, so she got up to talk to him and find out what was wrong. "Leonard, is everything OK," she asked with concern.

"I have to go to the bathroom." was all that Leonard said as he looked down the corridor, looking for the bathroom, seeing it, then heading over to it. Penny watched him go, a little bewildered.

Leonard entered the bathroom and locked the door behind him, he was feeling sick and mad at the same time, tears were coming from his eyes. He stood there for about a minute, breathing heavily, then he couldn't take it any longer and kicked the garbage can, yelling "Dam it". Leonard then went to the sink and stared at himself, loathing the person in the mirror looking at him.

Penny and Dr Glauser had both turned in surprise when they heard the noise of the trash can and Leonard yelling 'Dam it'. Penny excused herself and went to the bathroom door and tried to turn the handle, but it was locked. She was worried, "Leonard, are you Ok?"

Penny's voice broke the trace he was in, "Yes, just give me a minute." he told her. Leonard then turned on the sink and splashed water on his face.

Penny waited a minute and was just about to say something, when the door opened and out stepped Leonard. He still looked somewhat distressed and exhausted. "Honey, what's wrong?"

Leonard sighed, then shook his head, "Nothing, she will be Ok. She is asleep now."

Penny was worried about him, he looked confused, like something was going on in his mind, he couldn't resolve, "Do you want to stay with her?" she asked.

Leonard had been thinking about that, he didn't know what to do, he had to think about Alex and Penny, he didn't want to leave Penny alone either. He was worried about them both, why couldn't he take care of them both? Leonard tried to think about it logically, Alex would be asleep till morning and the nurses would watch over her, so she wouldn't be alone. However, Penny would probably stay up all night, if he stayed with Alex all night, and Penny needed to sleep, she just got there yesterday, plus he didn't want her far from him right now. So he decided Penny needed him more at the moment.

Penny was looking at him, but he was just staring at nothing and he was obviously upset. "Leonard, sweetie, please come back to me?"

Leonard looked at Penny and could she that she had a worried look on her face, "I'm sorry, I don't think there is anything we can do here tonight, we'll come back in the morning."

Leonard walked over to Dr Glauser and explained what they needed to do. Dr Glauser said he would pick Leonard up in the morning to take him to the hospital and would now take him and Penny back to the Hostel. Leonard thanked him and went to the nurses station to provide his Hostel phone number, in case Alex woke up before morning.

Leonard was very quiet all the way from the hospital to the Hostel. He thanked Dr Glauser for the ride and told him he would see him in the morning, then Leonard took Penny back to the room. Once in the room he sat on the bed, staring again for a couple of minutes, he knew why Alex was hurt, he had left her alone and forgot about her, since he was concerned about Penny. How could he be so stupid, he left her and all she wanted to do was get something to eat, she was hungry, just hungry. But she had no one to go with, he had abandoned her, she had no one, she was alone. What was wrong with him, how could he just leave her alone like that, that was so cruel, he was a bad person. Oh God, what if she had been hurt worse, or dead, he really had screwed up, boy had he screwed up, he hated himself.

Penny watched Leonard, he was so distant, he was breathing hard and he was really upset. She then realized why, she should have noticed it before, Leonard was blaming himself, he felt responsible for Alex getting hurt. Leonard always felt responsible for everyone, he was so protective of everyone around him, 'Especially me', she thought. She needed to help him, he can't take responsibility for everyone, he had to see that.

"Leonard it's not your fault, honey. You didn't hurt Alex." Penny told him

Leonard looked at her, he was breathing hard, "She was my responsibility, I was suppose to take care of her. Who else's fault is it?"

"The people who hurt her. Not yours." She answered

Leonard thought, 'She didn't understand', he wanted to tell her, he loathed that he was keeping a secret from her. How would she take it, he knew he was probably doing something dumb, but he had to tell her.

"Penny, I am madly in love with you. You know that, don't you?" Leonard started

Penny nodded, "Yes Honey." He was leading to something, Penny could tell by the way he is acting.

Leonard decided to go on, "I would never risk what we have together. You are the one I want and the one I am with." he took a breathe, "Penny something happened last weekend with Alex. She told me she loved me."

Penny felt her heart go to her throat, she just stared at Leonard, she didn't know what to say, what to do. She had never imagined he would say that, when he started this conversation, she was shocked, angry, hurt, confused and wanted to just run away. But while she looked at him, she saw his eyes, she knew he loved her, he had told her so and he didn't lie about those things, he wasn't that kind of guy. She told herself. 'Get over it Penny, he needs a girlfriend he can depend on.' So she willed herself to calm down, Alex hadn't taken him away, he was still hers. She thought for a moment, she had to say the right thing so she wouldn't hurt him, he was already hurting too much.

"Honey, I'm sorry, that must have been difficult for you." She said, while taking his hand.

'She understood, at least a little', he thought, he then said very quietly, "I told her, I wasn't over you, and we were getting back together when I got back. I broke her heart. I talked to her and tried to tell her, tried to make her understand, that it wasn't her, that I was still in love with you and couldn't be with her." Leonard stopped for a couple seconds trying to compose himself.

Penny was trying so hard not to cry, Leonard was so different than any man she had ever known, she loved him so much. She couldn't find words to say so she just took his other hand in hers to try and comfort him.

Leonard look at her, "Penny, I love you, but it is hard for me to hurt someone who loves me. Do you understand?"

Penny nodded, she loved him, she wanted to take him in her arms, but she knew he had to finish. Penny also wanted to hate Alex, but she couldn't, not with Alex laying in a hospital, hurt and alone. She knew Leonard was a great guy, and other smarter girls probably saw that quicker than she had, so she could see them falling in love with him. Priya did, Stephanie did and now Alex, all beautiful smart women, they had all wanted Leonard. If he wasn't truly in love with her, she would have lost him long ago, and thinking that sent a shiver up her spine. She looked at him, trying to let him know, how she cared about him.

Leonard continued, "I have been rejected many times before in my life, and I know how that feels, I didn't want to do that to someone else. So, I didn't allow it to be awkward, and I made sure she knew I was still her friend and I tried to keep things like they had been before. I think she was getting over it, as long as things were the same, I think she would have been fine, but then I forgot about her. I should have took her with us tonight, I left her alone. Penny she had no one, all she wanted to was eat, so she went out by herself and got attacked." Leonard was having a little trouble breathing, again.

Penny knew how Leonard was, he was taking all the responsibility on his shoulders again. "Leonard, if it was reversed and I was here with a guy, I loved, would you have gone out with us tonight?"

Leonard looked at her surprised, and quietly said, "No."

"Neither would have Alex, as a women, I can guarantee that. She wouldn't have wanted to be around us. So what would you have done?" She asked him

"I don't know." Leonard answered, he couldn't find an answer to her question.

Penny took her hands from him and put her arms around his neck, drawing him close enough that their noses almost touched and stared into his eyes. "Honey, I don't know anyway you could have kept her from being a little hurt, about you not loving her that way, you can't just make things better, unless you left me for her, that would be the only way. Do you want to do that, to make Alex happy?" Penny held her breathe, she thought she knew what he was going to say, but there was a tiny amount of uncertainty and that scared the hell out of her.

Penny didn't have a second to worry, "No Penny, I love you, I don't know what I would do without you, my life wouldn't be the same." he sighed, "But Penny, both of you are my responsibility right now. I have to make sure both of you are OK. You're the one I love Penny, please don't hate me that I need to take care of her, too."

"Honey, I know you love me. I don't hate you." Penny then gave him a kiss, then she pulled him into a hug.

Penny and Leonard sat there, for a while, holding each other, not saying a word. Leonard then let her go and suddenly he got animated, like something had came to him, and he got up to turn on his computer.

As the computer booted up, Leonard turned to her, "Alex needs to go back to California Saturday, and so do you." he had a determined look on his face.

Penny's heart skipped a beat, she was about to cry, the way he looked at her, left no doubt he wanted her to go, she couldn't understand what was happening, she didn't want to leave him. She thought that they were good, didn't she do the right thing just now, she was now distressed, "Please Leonard, I love you, please don't send me away. I don't want to leave you."

Leonard shook his head, "No, I'm sorry, I am not sending you away, I'm going with you both."