Author's Note: My muse definitely likes to work when she's not supposed to – she has been feeding me bits and pieces of chapters for all my stories when I was supposed to be working (I started on a brand new job two weeks ago after four joyful months being the stay-at-home wife and mom of two I have been since December). Since I live in the constant fear that if I stop giving in to my fickle muse she'll vanish completely (it can happen!), I usually always leave an empty document open on my work computer specifically for those occasion. This little rewrite was born from one of those situations.

Disclaimer: Glee doesn't belong to me. It belongs to RM and to Fox (which has renewed it for two more years. WHY?)

here, there, everywhere

#36: hold me close, don't ever let me go

When Rachel realized Finn had noticed Jesse was absent (due to previous traveling commitments he had with his former Vocal Adrenaline companions), a growing feeling of dread started to squeeze her heart every time Mr. Schue asked if anyone had anything to present to them during glee rehearsals. She hadn't forgotten Finn's words when she lied to him about breaking up with Jesse. I'm not some guy you just met. I don't give up that easy.

Until then, other than shooting her unsubtle longing glances that left Rachel feeling awkward and uncomfortable and Jesse clenching his fists in anger, he hadn't done anything (praise the Lord). But with Jesse gone for the week and physically unable to do anything to avenge his bruised honor, Rachel knew Finn would make his move. He was all for secret moves that he thought were okay but actually weren't (kissing her on the auditorium and asking her not to tell anyone; taking her out on a bowling date and kissing her to convince her to rejoin ND, anyone?)

It wasn't until after she had lost her voice that Finn decided the right time had arrived. He stood in front of the gleeks, eyes locked on her shrinking form, and serenaded her... with Jesse's Girl. Oh, God. Explicitness, thy name is Finn Hudson.

Rachel wasn't stupid. She knew Finn had decided to sing specifically that song for her with hopes that it would cause her to jump in his arms and profess her eternal love for him. And it would, make no mistake. If it had happened about three weeks ago, such a direct declaration of interest from his part would send a thrilled Rachel in a tailspin of joy... But that was before.

That was before she met Jesse and learned what real love felt like. That was before she found the one person who understood her perfectly. That was before she felt real, epic, overwhelming love for the first time. Now that she had gone through all those moments and emotions, she looked at Finn and all she felt was embarrassment and pity for the boy whose crush on her would never be reciprocated again. As he sang about how he wished he had Jesse's girl, she stood up, picked up her bag and, shaking her head negatively at him with a pitiful look, left without looking back.

She was already safely locked in her car and driving away from McKinley's parking lot when he, panting from the exertion of running after her, appeared on the front doors. A sinking feeling of failure crashed at him when Mike appeared behind him, followed by all the gleeks (who no doubt were curious as hell to know if his bid to regain Rachel's heart would be successful or not), and slapped his shoulder with what was supposed to be a comforting smile but was just an embarrassed grimace. "I'm sorry, man".

The house was quiet and empty when Rachel arrived from school, and she remembered it was Wednesday, her fathers' obligatory dinner date night. Since they had started dating, Jesse and she had taken the opportunity of having a free house on a school night for themselves to enjoy a quiet night in of take-out and movies (read: make out and grow closer and closer to that line that once crossed couldn't be uncrossed). Having to spend it alone for the first time in weeks, Rachel felt such a deep sorrow that, before she could catch herself, she was dialing Jesse's number and anxiously listening as it rang… and rang… and rang.

She was about to hang up and throw herself on a night of wallowing with The Way We Were and soy sorbet when the call was (finally!) picked up and a heavy silence stretched between them. After a long moment, she heard Jesse sigh tiredly and mumble in an exhausted voice, "What's it, Rachel?"

"Can you come home?" She whispered, cringing at her rough voice.

There was another sigh, and then Jesse spoke again. "Rachel, I-"

"No, Jesse, please" She felt the first stirrings of despair in her heart and stood up, pacing anxiously. "Can you just... Can you just listen to me? Please. That's all I ask. If you still feel like breaking up with me after I'm done, then I'll never bother you again, but you have to listen to me first".

There was a long silence. Finally, her boyfriend broke it. "Can you answer me a question first?"

"Sure", she replied, quickly and nervously.

"What's wrong with your voice?"

The brunette flinched and put a defensive hand on her throat. "Laryngitis. I have to carry all the weight now that you're not here to share it, and it put a strain on my voice".

Unknown to Rachel, Jesse's eyes widened with alarm and he sat up on his bed. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, yeah. Don't worry about that. The doctor wanted to have my tonsils removed, but I managed to convince him to fill me up with medication instead. I cannot let him take his chances with my throat, of course".

She could almost hear the smile in his voice when he said, "Of course", and it made her heart flutter. Taking a deep breath, she worried her lower lip and then plunged right in.

"Finn serenaded me today. He chose to do it with Jesse's Girl". She could almost see him flinch when he heard those words, and she rushed on. "I'm sorry, but I don't want to keep any more secrets from you, Jesse. Plus you'd find out anyway if you come back to McKinley next week. Anyways. While he was singing to me, all I could think was how wrong it felt that he was doing that while you weren't there to stake your claim on me. And then I realized that you don't need to stake any claims, because that would mean you're insecure about his position on my life. And..." The brunette looked at a picture of them she had on her nightstand, and picking it up, she carried on. "There's no need for you to feel that. I am not in love with Finn anymore, Jesse. I know it might have looked like I was with my triple-casting stunt, but I promise you, I'm not".

Jesse didn't reply, but, when he spoke, his voice was so exhausted that all she wanted to do was to hop on the next plane and fly all the way to San Diego to take him in her arms and comfort him. "How can you be sure of that, Rach?"

"I just am. When he was singing, all I kept thinking was that it was too late. If he sang to me weeks ago, sure, I would have been thrilled. Insane with happiness, really. But that was before. Before I met you. Before I... Before I fell for you".

There. She had said it. Not with many words, but Jesse was a smart boy. Sure he would pick up on what she meant. And, when he carefully asked, "What are you saying, Rach?" she knew she was right.

"Do I really have to spell it out for you?"

"Yes", he shot back.

Rachel sighed dramatically, and then whispered. "I love you, Jesse."

There was a silence, and then, he began to sing softly. "Saying I love you is not the words I want to hear from you. It's not that I want you not to say, but if you only knew how easy it would be to show me how you feel. More than words is all you have to do to make it real. Then you wouldn't have to say that you love me, cause I'd already know". Rachel bit the inside of her lower lip as she understood what he meant with that song.

"Okay. Message received, Jesse", she said as her mind flipped anxiously through several ideas of how to prove to Jesse she loved him with actions and not just words.

"Good", he replied. There was a smile on his face when he said, "See you next week, Rach".

She was grinning as she replied. "See you next week".

When he arrived at McKinley the following week, he was definitely not expecting to receive the welcome he got. Once he stepped foot on that dreadful school (he hated it, but it was where Rachel was, and he loved Rachel, so there he stayed), he expected to be greeted by an armful of overjoyed Rachel. But, instead, he was greeted by a fist on his face and a seething beanstalk that looked ready to murder him.

"It's all your fault!" That talentless oaf barked, spit flying out of his mouth and straight to Jesse's pristinely-cared-for skin. "Are you happy now?"

Shoving the guy back, Jesse stood up and wiped his face clean of the dude's spit (so gross). "What the fuck do you mean, Hudson?"

"Don't play dumb with me!" Finn yelled, looking as red as a tomato in his anger (so not attractive. What did Rachel see in that guy?) "Rachel left for Carmel last week and it's all your fault!"

It took all of Jesse's famous will power not to let his jaw drop in the aftermath of Finn's shocking news. He hadn't spoken to Rachel since their conversation last week and his musical hint for her on how he wanted her to prove her love (with actions instead of words). She hadn't called him, only texted him to wish him a safe flight back the previous afternoon.

Well, he had challenged her – subtly, but still – and she definitely had risen to the challenge. Transferring to Carmel was certainly the best way Rachel could show her love for him. Turning on his heel, he made his way back to front door – and when one of Finn's paws gripped his shoulder to keep him from leaving, he twirled around and punched the quarterback with all his might. Finn, caught by surprise, fell down to the floor with a grunt. Jesse gave him his darkest glare, and leaned a little down to growl, "Try to serenade my girl again, Hudson, and I will not be as merciful".

Puckerman arrived as he was leaving, and he whistled as he caught sight of Finn sprawled on the hall, the beginnings of a nasty bruise already showing on his cheek. "Nice one, St. James", he said, impressed, then looked seriously at the former Vocal Adrenaline lead (who was clearly on his way to reclaim the position now that Rachel was also there). "Take good care of my hot little Jewish-American princess, will you?"

Jesse nodded back at the one guy he knew was the rival he had to look out for. Rachel probably never noticed it, but Jesse did: Puck loved Rachel and, if given the chance, he wouldn't let her go, putting everything he was and giving everything had to make her fall for him and subsequently make her happy. "See you in Regionals, man".

He was about to pull out his cell phone to call Rachel and track her down, when he finally spotted her. With a small smile on her lips, surrounded by the thirty members of Vocal Adrenaline and wearing form fitting black denim pants and the bow-printed sweater she wore when they first met at the music store, paired up with one of his leather jackets, Rachel stood on the middle of the McKinley parking lot. She walked up to him, took his hand on hers and, turning to the grinning VA members, declared, "We have our male lead back!"

The thirty teenagers yelled out in joy, and Jesse grinned at his (once-again) team as he pulled Rachel tight against his body and smashed his lips against hers. Feeling her smile, he chuckled against her mouth as her arms found their way around his neck and she clung to him tightly. "I love you", he mumbled as they pulled apart, both breathless and glowing with happiness. As they held tight to each other's hands, Jesse turned to the smiling faces of Vocal Adrenaline and yelled, "Let's win ourselves another Regionals trophy!"

"Yeah!" The crowded teens yelled out in unison, Rachel blending in perfectly with her new peers.