Hello (=

So, I'm literally like counting down the final chapters! Just five more to go )=

I love how most, almost all, of you pointed out that Edward totally deserved what he got last chapter. I kinda felt super bad for doing that to him, but, as some of you pointed out, at least he knew he deserved it (= Still, sorry Eddie .. We didn't get as many reviews as the previous chapter, but thanks to those of you that did take the time to review (=

And I can't forget, a big thanks to the beta, blackwolf2dragoon (= You're awesome.

Song for this chapter: Lullaby by The Spill Canvas. It's a super cute song (= You can go straight to my profile and listen to it, then download it if you like it.

On to part two!


Chapter 36 .. Bella

"Bella, please come out."

I closed my eyes and put my hands over my face. He'd been at this for over an hour now and I didn't know what to do.

I hated being mad at Edward. I hated yelling at him, and some part of me wanted to take back everything I said. Wanted to take back hitting him. He didn't deserve that.

But another part of me thought he deserved every bit of it. Even the slap. But it didn't stop me from feeling bad.

"Love, I'm so sorry. I'll spend the rest of my life making this up to you if you'd just open this door. I love you."

And hearing him plead through the bathroom door of some hotel room was not how I wanted to spend my alone time with Edward.

I didn't know what to do. He was making this so hard. I wanted to stand my ground and let him suffer for what he did to me, but I just couldn't. The tears were running down my face and I couldn't stop them. Every time I heard him put his hand on the other side of the door, they fell harder. Every time he pleaded with me to just open the door, they started falling quicker.

The fact that he had put our baby at risk by not telling me the truth, hurt me. That hurt me worse than anything he'd ever done, and I didn't know how to forgive him. I didn't know how to tell him it was alright while still trying to stress to him that what he did was so wrong. What he did could have killed our child.

I just couldn't bring myself to think that he wanted that to happen. Because I knew better. I knew Edward, and I knew he was sorry. But how did I forgive him?

I sighed and laid my head back against the door just as he knocked again. I squeezed my eyes shut, "Please stop." I whispered. I didn't expect him to hear me.

"Bella, please come out."

His voice was laced with angst and I could hear every bit of it.

I turned to the side and hit my hand on the floor. Then I reached up off of the floor and put my hand gently on my stomach. I rubbed soothing circles on my skin, remembering what Edward had asked of our child earlier.

Be good to your mommy. She doesn't want anything to happen to you.

Now I understood, but why did he have to keep it from me. He was right, I'd never understand what he'd been going though, but that was his fault! That was all his doing. He was in the wrong, not me.

But as I started to think more, I realized Edward couldn't do this alone, just as much as I couldn't do this alone. And right now, we were both alone. On opposite ends of a door.

If I just took the time to hear him out. To listen to why he didn't tell me..

But no! I wanted to stay mad!

Ugh!

I was torn between wanting to understand and comfort then man I loved and wanting to be angry with him for keeping something from me. That wasn't marriage! We were supposed to be honest with one another, not hide stuff, important stuff!

The better part of me finally came to my senses and I slowly stood up, walked to the sink and dried my face. Then I walked to the door.

"Edward?"

I heard him hit the door and then heard a faint scrambling, like he was trying to stand too quick.

"Bella?"

I took a deep breath and opened the door. He had both hands on either side of the door frame, leaning forward.

"Bella, I'm so sorry. Please just let me explain, and I promise I'll tell you everything. I'm so sorry love." He looked down at his feet and started taking deep breaths.

The first thing I noticed about him was his face. He had tears streaking his cheeks, like I did, and his eyes were red and bloodshot, like mine. I stepped forward and stood in front of him. Then I reached up and took his face in my hands, wiping the tears away.

"Edward, I'm still upset with you, but I want to talk. I want to talk about this and learn whatever it is I need to know." I brought his face upwards so I could see his eyes, "You're going to tell me everything though. No more hiding things from me. You need to understand that we're married. I'm your wife and there is no reason for you to hide things like that from me. If you ever do that again Edward, if you hide from me and lie to me about something that big ever again, I don't know what's going to happen to us, because I can't live like that. I can't deal with not being able to tell if my husband is telling me the truth or not. You're not going to lie to me anymore, and from now on, we are together on everything! I mean it Edward. I won't do this again."

He nodded and fresh tears rolled down his cheeks. "I understand Bella." Then he gently took my hands from his face and kissed both of my palms. "I'll never be able to express how sorry I am for doing what I did. It was beyond wrong to lie to you and hide that from you, but I understand now why I never should have. It was very important for you to know all of that about the baby, and yourself, but I was just too scared. I was too coward to say anything because I felt like it would make you upset. I didn't want you to feel like it was your fault."

I leaned forward and rested my head on his chest. His hands instantly went behind me, one around my waist, and the other to the back of my neck. He moved my hair out of the way and rested his hand against the back of my head, holding me to him.

I felt right. Though there was still a part of me that was so angry with him, I couldn't stay mad. I knew I wanted to try and understand, and staying mad at him just wasn't the way to do that.

I asked him to explain to me, and that's what he did. For the next hour he just sat there and held me as he explained everything. Every phone call to Carlisle, every hospital trip, the real reason why we had to visit Carlisle every two weeks instead of once a month or so. He explained that Esme had overheard a phone call and that's why Rosalie texted Edward's phones, and also that we were going to have to settle every one down once we got home.

"Bella?"

I looked up at Edward as he shifted on the bed. "Yeah?"

He gave me a weak smile, "Would you like me to heat up your lunch. You must still be hungry."

I nodded slowly, "Thank you."

He walked over to the microwave in the mini kitchen area and put my cheeseburger and fries in. He set the timer and when it was done, he carried it to the table for me.

I got up and walked over, taking my seat as he did the same with his lunch.

He sat down next to me, and just stared at me.

I picked up my burger and took a small bite. It was good, but I guess I just wasn't in the mood to eat. I wasn't in the mood for much.

Edward sighed and picked up his burger, eating it slowly.

We both sat in complete silence for the remainder of our meal. He finished his while I just managed to push a couple fries around my plate. Edward cleaned up his area, then threw away his trash before sitting back down next to me.

"Bella, aren't you hungry?"

I shrugged, "Not really."

He sighed and nodded, "I'm sorry."

I looked up at met his eyes. He was sorry, I didn't doubt that, but I was still upset. I wasn't so much mad at him anymore, just upset at the whole situation.

Edward and I had so much on our plates already, why this? Why me? Why us? Couldn't we catch any kind of break?

How did life expect us to move on and take care of what we had if it just kept throwing more and more at us? How much more did it think we could take?

"Bella?"

I blinked several times, focusing on Edward again. "Yes?"

He sighed, "Will you ever forgive me?"

I nodded, "I will." Then I scooted closer and put my hand on his, "You hurt me Edward. You know what you did was wrong, but you'll never see it from my point of view, just as I'll never really fully understand it from your point of view."

He leaned forward a bit, placing a gentle kiss to my forehead. "I know, and I'm so sorry for what I did. I feel like saying sorry isn't enough but I don't know what else to say."

"Say you'll never do it again."

He nodded, "I'll never, ever do it again Bella. I love you so much and I regret what I did. I felt so awful for so long because I hadn't told you. As much as I didn't want you to be upset or angry or heartbroken because of what was happening, I felt terrible for not telling you because I hated handling it all on my own. I felt like I was about to break."

I nodded, "I bet. You should have never had to carry that all on your own. You need to learn to talk to me Edward. I can't stress that enough."

He looked down at the table and took my hands. "You.." He stopped and took a quick breath, "Do you remember last night? When I said that I was worried that any moment..?" He looked up just as I nodded, urging him on. "I was going to say I'm worried that at any moment I'll lose everything. At any moment something could happen to you and we could lose the baby," Tears started falling down his face and his voice was cracking toward the end. "And if I lose the baby, I lose you too. I can't do that."

His eyes pleaded with me, pleading for what I didn't quite know, but they were intense and sad.

"I'm sorry Edward." I took both his hands in mine and held them tight. "Well, you're not alone anymore. We're going to be together on this from now on, and I promise, you won't lose me."

He nodded slowly, "But I will." His eyes stayed focused on mine, "Bella, if we lose this baby, if something happens, I know you. I know you're going to blame yourself, and I'll lose you. I'll lose a part of you that I'll never get back."

I looked down and nodded, "Yeah, but we won't lose this baby." I lifted my head to give him the best smile I could muster. "We won't Edward, I promise. You've told me how to take care of myself, and I'm going to do it. I promise. We will not lose this child."

He gave me a small smile back and nodded, "I hope you're right Bella."

I shrugged, "I usually am."

He chuckled a little, then wiped the tears from his eyes.

I was still angry, but not much at him anymore. As much as I wanted to be, I just couldn't. He did exactly what I asked of him. He explained everything, told me everything about anything I asked.

Then, before I could say anything, Edward stood up and picked me up bridal style, carried me to the bed and laid me down. I settled into the bed as he grabbed the remote and turned the TV on.

He finally stopped at some movie and set the remote down before cuddling against me. He leaned down and kissed the side of my head. "I know I've already said it, but I'm sorry, and I love you."

I looked up and gently kissed his jaw, "I love you too."

I felt him smile against my forehead and we both turned back to the TV.

For the rest of the day that's all we did. We relaxed and laid back, doing nothing but watching mindless television and cuddling together. We never spoke further about any of what happened earlier. That was best though, for us to forgive and try to forget, that's what we had to do. I didn't want to stay mad at Edward forever. I couldn't.

Around four Edward ordered hot food for us and we ate in bed. The only time we actually crawled out of bed was to take showers, then we settled right back in bed. Eventually Edward ordered dinner for us, and when he returned to the bed with the food, I grimaced.

"Bella? What's wrong?"

I sat up and shrugged, "I think I need to get out of bed Edward. I've been laying her entirely too long." I moved to the edge and he motioned for me to hold on. I nodded and watched him walk to the table and set the food down. Then he walked back over to me and held a hand out. I gave him a small smile and took it, letting him lead me to the table. He pulled my chair out and waited for me to sit before pushing it back to the table.

He took his seat next to me and looked at me, "Better?" He gave me his signature crooked grin and I nodded. He turned back to his plate and started eating.

I looked down at my plate, but didn't move to pick anything up. Instead I turned back to Edward. "I'm sorry."

He quickly looked to me and dropped his fork. "Bella, what for?"

"Hitting you. You didn't deserve that." I looked down and fidgeted with the napkin on my leg. "I shouldn't have.."

"Bella," Edward reached over and put his palm against my cheek, cupping my face in his hand. "Don't apologize. I did deserve that."

I shook my head, but kept looking down at the napkin, now in two pieces. "I've never done that, and I don't know why I did now." I looked up and met his eyes, but quickly looked away.

He kept his hold on my face and gently turned me to look toward him. My eyes still didn't see him though.

"Look at me please."

I finally did. As my eyes locked with his, my heart started beating erratically in my chest. I swallowed hard and sighed, "I'm sorry if I hurt you."

He chuckled once and shook his head slowly, "Silly Bella, you could never hurt me." He winked at me and smiled, "It got the point across though. I should have never lied to you. I deserved that, and I probably deserved it to really hurt."

I frowned, "I didn't want it to hurt. I didn't even want to hit you, but my mind said otherwise."

He laughed gently and quietly. "You could never hurt me as much as I hurt you."

Now I knew he was talking emotionally. I never intended to ever him, emotionally, or physically.

I shook my head, "It's over though, right?"

He nodded, "Right."

"You'll never lie to me again, and you'll be completely honest with me for the rest of our lives? You'll learn to talk to me?"

He nodded again, "Yes. I will learn, I promise."

I leaned forward and put my hand over his, gently pulling it from my face and entwining his fingers in mine. "Why do you do that? You never used to."

He looked down for a second, then shrugged, "I can't explain it love. I just," He took a deep breath, "I can't hurt you. Before, if I lied to you for some stupid reason, or did something stupid to make you mad, you'd maybe ignore me for a couple hours, or hurl the nearest book at me or something. All I'd have to do is say sorry and hold you until you gave up and forgave me. It's different now. We're different."

I shook my head, "We're not that much different Edward."

He shrugged, "We're married. That's different."

I nodded, "That is different. But if you remember right, we promised each other that this wasn't just a marriage, it was a commitment. To one another, forever. You remember right?"

He nodded, "I remember." Then he smiled, "I remember that we agreed that if this ever became just a marriage, we'd know we failed. I'm not going to let that happen Bella. This isn't just a marriage to me, it's you and I, best friends and in love."

I sighed and smiled, "Exactly. This isn't going to fail as long as you and I talk. People go to therapy for this kind of thing Edward!"

We both started laughing as he leaned forward and gently kissed me.

"I've been afraid to kiss you all day." He looked down away from me and closed his eyes.

I squeezed his hand to gain his attention. "Why Edward?"

He shrugged his shoulder slowly, "Thought you might slap me again." Then he chuckled and looked back up at me. "Thought you were still mad at me and I didn't want to push it. Didn't want to push you."

I smiled and leaned forward, locking our lips again. His lips moved gently against mine, but the hunger was still there. The passion I always felt from him was still there.

When Edward pulled away, he took a deep breath to steady his breathing. His eyes were still closed as he placed his forehead against mine. Then without a word, he pulled away and pushed my plate near me, "Finish eating love."

I nodded and picked up my fork.

Dinner passed without many words spoke to one another, and afterwards, Edward cleaned up, putting our plates outside.

When we both moved to sit back on the bed, Edward hesitated. He climbed back off the bed and dug through our bag. After a couple seconds, he pulled his Ipod and dock out and set it on the nightstand. He smiled as he turned it on and scrolled through it for a minute.

As he set it down on the dock and climbed back on the bed, he gently brought me to his chest. "Let me take care of you tonight Bella." He whispered against the base of my ear, causing shivers to shoot down my back. The soothing rthym of Edwards favorite classical music filled the room and set a calm atmosphere.

He reached to the side of me and placed a pillow at the head of the bed, and another one about a foot or so below it, both laying horizontal across the bed. Then he gently pushed me over the pillows and gestured for me to lay down.

"What are you doing?" I smiled over my shoulder at him as he kissed the back of my head.

He moved to straddle my legs, careful to not put any weight on me, and smiled, "I'm taking care of you. The pillows are so your stomach isn't pressed too hard against the bed." He leaned down, moving the hair to the side and kissed the back of my neck. "Just be still Bella, and don't protest. You deserve to be taken care of."

I nodded and as he reached up and put a third pillow under my head. I laid my face sideways on it and closed my eyes.

First, he slowly ran his hands over my shoulders, gently massaging the muscles there and forcing me to relax. His fingers worked magic on my shoulders and soon my upper back. Before I knew it, I was sighing and breathing out after every gentle massage his hands made against me. He kept working until he reached my lower back. There he stayed a bit longer, turning my lower muscles to jelly under his touch. As he pressed a bit harder toward the middle of my back I let out a low moan and I heard him chuckle under his breath. I smiled and turned my face into the pillow so he couldn't here my appreciation. I never knew Edward could be so wonderful at this. If I had known, he would have been doing this a long time ago!

"Feel better Bella?"

I nodded as he moved back up my back to my arms. He laid them out flat and moved up a bit, massaging my upper arms.

"This might be a bit easier," He gently pulled the strap of my tank top, "If this wasn't in the way."

He helped me remove the garment before moving back down to my lower back. He worked there for a bit longer, before moving down my legs. He sat right at my feet and moved his hands over my calves and down to my ankles.

Before he started touching my feet, he climbed to the side of me and moved his hand to the back of my head. He kissed my cheek and trailed light kisses to my ear, "Roll over love." He kissed my earlobe and smiled against my temple.

I did as he asked and he moved back down to sit at the bottom on my feet. He picked up my left foot first and rested it on his knee. He pressed his thumbs into the bottom on my foot, deriving another soft moan from me.

He chuckled as I laid my head back and looked up toward the ceiling.

He continued his ministrations on my foot before bringing my ankle up to his lips. He placed a soft kiss on the inside of my ankle, then smiled and released my foot, laying it back on the bed.

He picked up my other foot and repeated his every action.

I couldn't believe how great he was making me feel. How amazing his hands were making my body feel. His every movement, every rub sent my mind into a frenzy.

When he was finished with my right foot, he kissed my ankle in the same spot as the opposite ankle. Then he slowly moved up my body until he reached my stomach. When he was close enough, I reached my hands out to rest against his arms. He lowered himself down to gently kiss the middle of my stomach. I blushed slightly at the sight of him kissing my bare stomach, but when he looked up at me through his thick, dark eyelashes the blush intensified. I felt the warm crimson coat my cheeks til I was sure they were as red as they could ever get.

He smiled up at me, obviously amused by my blush, and kissed his way up my torso, over my chest and to my neck. His body moved up and gently rested against mine. He made sure to keep most, if not all, of his weight off of me, but kept himself close enough to me that I wasn't pulling him to me. Though I wanted to.

He started kissing my neck, sucking gently right above my collarbone. I tilted my head to the side and allowed him better access as my hands roamed up and down his back, pulling gently at his shirt, then letting it go.

"Bella," He breathed, the kissed up the side of my neck and moved one hand to my hip, while still supporting himself with the other hand.

I closed my eyes and felt his lips move against my neck, reveling in the amazing feeling he was giving me.

He stopped nipping at my neck long enough to take a deep, shaky breath. "Bella?"

I moved my face enough to see his, "Yes?" I couldn't bring my voice to anything about a breath.

He smiled, "You're mine." Then he went back to kissing my neck. He gave me a couple more lingering kisses before moving to the other side, gently nudging my face to the other side with his nose. He then started the same ministrations on the opposite side. "Mine."

The way his voice rang with possessiveness sent new shivers down my body, so much that my toes were tingling.

I smiled and laid my head back, arching my neck just slightly. My eyes drifted closed as I tangled my hands in his hair. I gently pulled and tugged at his bronze locks, forcing them to stand up and out between my fingers.

"Bella?" He removed his lips from my skin and moved his hand up my side, wrapping half way around me and pulled me against him. His arm stayed under me, supporting me as he kissed my jaw.

I opened my eyes and moved my head just enough to find his lips with mine. I kissed him quick, then smiled, "Yes Edward?"

He smiled back at me, then sighed, "Say you're mine." He whispered against my cheek and I felt his breath tickle my flushed skin.

I trembled slightly and sighed, moving one hand down his neck and pulling his head closer to me, "I'm yours."

I felt him smile against my cheek as he kissed up to my temple, then back down to my neck, and around to behind my ear. He bit down gently on my earlobe, then trailed his warm lips back down to my neck, biting down again until I gasped quietly. It wasn't enough to hurt, but probably enough to leave a mark.

I couldn't bring myself to care.

I sighed again as I gripped his shirt in my fist, "Edward. Yours."

He kissed me right above where he left his mark and sighed, "Always Bella."

I nodded gently, "Always."

I started jerking at his shirt until he got the hint and raised himself up enough to remove it. He laid back down against me and instead of continuing to kiss my neck, he kissed my lips. The searing heat from his kiss ensured the blush would stay in my cheeks until he stopped.

And I never wanted him to stop.

He kissed me once more before raising up again and looking down at me, "Do you still love me Bella?"

I nodded quickly, "I'll always love you."

He smiled in relief and moved to my side, gently picking me up off the mattress and dragging the sheet down the bed. When it was free and over my legs, he moved me back in place and hovered over me as he covered us both up.

The next morning, I woke up snuggled in Edwards embrace. I looked up at his sleeping face and smiled. His hair was in all kinds of disarray and his lips were slightly parted. His arms were wrapped around me, holding me tight to his chest as he breathed evenly.

After all that had happened yesterday, all the anger I had inside of me, all the disappointment I felt toward him, this morning it was all gone. I didn't want to be mad anymore, and if there was ever a time to just forgive anything, it was now. I didn't need the added stress, or rage inside of me for something. No matter how big, it just wasn't worth the risk.

I turned, best I could in Edwards arms, and looked at the clock. It was still fairly early, so I rolled back over and snuggled back against Edward. His arms instictively pulled me closer and I instantly fell back into a deep sleep.

So? What did you guys think? I couldn't keep them mad at each other (or rather just Bella mad at Edward) forever. So they made up (= Sorta.

Alright, soooo, I only have 21 votes in the poll so far. Are those people the only ones that are curious about the baby? I think not. So go vote! Voice an opinion! Lmao.

Next chapter is the baby shower (= And this is a Cullen baby shower we're talking about! Any guesses as to who is gonna go for the fun present? Ha ha ha.

Thank you guys so much for the reviews. Especially all the people that are faithful and review each and every chapter. I don't think I thank you guys properly. Even if you just leave a simple 'Good chapter' it still makes me smile, and even if I don't get the chance to respond back to your review, know that with each review I read, I say thank you out loud, lol. Silly, I know, but know that I do (=

I was actually hoping that this story could do as good, if not better than Becomes Attainable with reviews. Becomes Attainable has 424 reviews, this one has 351, think we can match the other story?? That's 73 reviews before the end of this story.. Think you can do it? (=