Fuzzy Images Pushed Together (Book Three)

by BluePixeledRedFox

Kurt & Kerri get be together! Or do they? After a mission to save a child from the Push there's a surprise. Kerri's not sure what to do, so she hides it. And, the Push is only the front for a benefactor who wants their way, and it may have lasting effects on them forever. Then Kerri's gone. Kurt doesn't believe Scott saying she ran away, but then where is she and who can find her?

36. What ifs part two

[AN: Thank you so much for you patience for this chapter; it's been really hard to get time to write lately with the holidays, my Grandma going to the hospital, and now (what made me unable to work on this yesterday) a coworker collapsing at work. Anyway, I know it's way past due, but here it is, and it's huge! So enjoy, the last chapter of the book, feel free to comment, vote, message me, or just read.]

---

This is basically the whole third book, rewritten as though Kerri didn't lose the baby. It may seem condensed in some places, but that's because you've all read what happened, and it's not so different in most places, so I skipped a lot or just described what happened to refresh your memory, since if I wrote more detail it would take even longer to get it out lol.

Kerri laid in the bed in the med lab, bruised, broken ribs, concussed, and sore. Kurt leaned over her, kissing her cheek. "I love you, liebling... I know zhat you don't feel very good, aber, I vanted to tell you zhat Dr. McCoy said zhat even zhough your ribs are broken, zhe baby vill be fine... Isn't zhat great?"

"Yes, that is good," Kerri answered, trying not to groan in pain.

He kissed her cheek again. "I know it hurts," he whispered. "But I vill kiss you until it doesn't, if you like..."

After Kerri was released from the med lab, she went about life normally, until one day, she went grocery shopping and suddenly felt something pressing into her mind, blinding her and making her unaware of her surroundings, until she passed out.

---

Kerri felt a tickling at her forehead and tried to rub it. Her hand rubbed against something, but her forehead still tickled. She moved her head to scratch it on her shoulder, but something kept her arm still.

Slowly one of Kerri's eyes opened, but everything was blurry. She closed it and squinted, opening and blinking her eyes, hoping that would help.

She looked at what was in front of where her head was and saw what seemed to be a true to life mad scientist's lab. Confused, she moved her head and looked around her.

Moving her head around was making her dizzy, so she stopped.

"So nice of you to join me in the realm of the living," a man's voice said from behind her, making her look to where it came from. "Since I can't get in when you're asleep, apparently. So I've had to wait for you to wake up so I can start my experiments," he told her, stepping into her sight.

He was wearing slacks, a lab coat, a tie, and goggles were swept back on his head, holding his hair back from her view. His eyes, were cold, dark, and seemed to drown out the rest of his face.

Kerri felt a shudder move down her spine, but didn't say anything.

"Do you think you can resist me, that you can stop what I'm going to do by not speaking?" He gave a half laugh and stepped towards her. "You're about to be sadly mistaken, missy."

Kerri knew that she had to protect herself and her baby. That was the main concern, protect them and then get them out. She closed her eyes, focusing on covering herself in spikes so he wouldn't be able to touch her, but when she opened her eyes, nothing.

He laughed. "You're powers won't work, not with me," he told her. "I can choose to see nothing you try to show."

Kerri tried harder, but nothing happened so she let out a breath. "Guess I'll have to kick your ass the old fashioned way," she told him looking up to his eyes.

"Don't try your tough talk with me, I could make you kill yourself, or your baby, if I wanted to," he told her.

Kerri studied him, trying to figure out what he meant.

"I've waited too long already to be able to run this experiment," he said, smiling. "Oh, you don't know what I mean?" Kerri was silent, calculating a way to escape. "After all, finding out you were pregnant put a huge wrench in my plan. I thought I'd found a solution to that, apparently not," he told her.

"You are pregnant, just lake that man said," the words flowed through Kerri's mind and her eyes opened wide in shock. "You," she accused. "You're the one who-"

"Told that man to punch you in the stomach? Yes, and kick you when I wasn't sure if it had worked," he told her.

"- tried to kill my baby," she growled, her body pulled at the restraints holding her, wanting desperately to cause harm to him.

"It's that blue boy's too, isn't it?" He asked, as though making conversation as he showed her the open locket he'd ripped from her neck. "If only mutant genetics was as open as you see in the papers or in movies; a disciple who could both change appearances and teleport would be wonderful."

Kerri growled again, rage coloring her eyesight red as she pulled at the restraints, the ones on her right arm coming free. She reached over and fought the straps on her left arm, swiping at him when he came close to her.

"Oh, don't want you getting out, now. Must not have tightened it enough." He dodged her fist the first time, but her nails caught him as he tried to get closer. "Enough of that," he growled and reached to the table, spraying something into her face, making everything fade to black again.

---

Kerri's eyes opened, hazily looking around.

"Finally, about time you woke up. Why do you have to be such trouble? You've delayed my work as long as I'll allow," the man in the lab coat told her.

She blinked, bringing herself to full consciousness as quickly as possible to defend herself, despite being restrained.

"It'll do you no good to fight," he told her, a cruel smile on his face. Kerri clenched her jaw as he got closer. "It'll happen just the same," he said, his hand smoothing back her hair. Kerri jerked her head away, but had nowhere to go. "Oh, yes, fighting will do you no good, but it will be entertaining to me," he told her, a creepy smile on his face as he loosened his tie.

Kerri suddenly had a panicked worry about what was about to happen to her body and baby.

The man stared into her eyes, but she stared back, steeling herself against him. He leaned closer, but she refused to let him get to her, realizing that he was trying to get into her mind.

His hands slammed against the metal she was strapped to, sending vibrations through her skull, but she wouldn't look away, refusing to let him in.

He took a hand full of her hair, hitting her head against the table as he grunted, trying to get in, she winced, but kept her eyes open.

He pushed harder, his face getting closer to hers, she would have head butt him if he didn't have a hold on her hair.

Kerri could feel the pressure against her brain as he tried to push his way in. He was older and more experienced with his power and was starting to make a dent in her walls.

He grunted loudly again and hit her head against the table, and her eyes fluttered, it was enough to break her hold, and she slammed her eyes shut, throwing up walls of steel, thick, thick walls that she hoped would keep him out. He was pushing against them, bending them, sending her running as she threw up more and more defenses.

There next to her, was a door, nice, solid, oaken, the door to her "safe place," but she didn't go in. 'I can't,' she thought to herself. 'If I hide in there, he'll get me, he'll kill my baby, I have to fight harder!'

She felt immense pain as the walls started to part, and tried to push them back together. "No," she told him. He pushed harder and Kerri felt something ripping, as though he was drilling into her mind, ripping through her skin to take what he wanted.

"No," she said again, but he was still getting in. "No, no, no!" She yelled, closing more, but no matter how hard she pushed, it was like he'd pinned down her arms and was pushing himself into her, ripping her unwilling, tender, flesh.

She writhed around, trying to throw him off, and she was screaming now, tears rolling down her cheeks at the pain, "NOOOO! AHHHHH! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

"Oh, yes," he said into her ear, voice pure evil. "And now that you know what I'm capable of, you should stop fighting and give in, or I'll kill your baby. I have plenty here to do it; I could just cut you open and take it, throw it on the ground and-"

Kerri's scream of horror drown out his words, but she knew what he was saying; the terrible things he'd do to her helpless baby. She sobbed, but stopped fighting, hoping to keep the two of them alive long enough to get out.

---

Kerri looked up at the roof over her head again, but her vision soon moved back to the wall, and back over to the window. Then back to the ceiling.

She sighed in aggravation.

This was the most boring time she'd ever spent anywhere.

The man who had kidnapped her had put her in this room, presumably sometime after she'd finally given in to protect the baby and passed out from the mental pain he was inflicting on her.

She wasn't sure how much time had passed, it could have been hours, days, weeks, months, probably not a year, but time had stretched out forever filled with nothing but staring at walls until she was able to break her bonds, then time filled with nothing but staring at the window, which was barred in with no one ever seeming to pass, now her brain was just tired from trying to come up with escape plans for who knew how long.

She knew logically, of course, that it hadn't been that long, though it felt like it, since her belly wasn't any more swollen with her baby. She was also glad that her stomach was the small mound still, proof that he hadn't cut her open and done those terrible things.

With a sigh, she turned back to her situation. The door, which seemed to be blocked by steel, couldn't seem to be opened, the window, besides the bars, no one seemed to pass, not to mention that it seemed to be either painted or nailed shut and made of bullet proof glass, and the walls were most likely cement since she wasn't able to make any kind of dent.

She had worn her hands out to bleeding, and had been worried that she'd broken one of her knuckles. Everything was ok now, but again, she wasn't sure if it had been enough time for it to heal, or if it had only been a bruise.

Most of what kept her going is that she had to protect her baby by escaping, and she had to get back to Kurt. She knew that he loved her and their baby, and that if it was at all possible, he'd be there to get them, so she knew that she needed to find a way to get to him, no matter how many bones she actually broke pounding on the walls or door.

---

Kerri woke to the same four walls, same bars on the window, same tree and flower beds outside, and same door that seemed to be bricked up.

"What a fucked up place," Kerri muttered to herself.

She stood and went to the door, only to see that it was a little opened already.

She looked around in confusion. She'd never been able to open it, turn the knob, or even hit it hard enough to hear a hollow sound.

After deciding that it was actually open, she opened it all the way and looked out.

What she saw didn't make any sense; it was the hall of the school, where she'd spent so much of the last two years.

She looked out into the hall, noticing no difference from the halls at the school, and decided to leave.

As her foot squashed on the soft carpet, she hurried to a place that was mostly hidden, her hand protectively on her stomach.

Kerri wandered around for about twenty minutes before she accepted that she was in the school, and, unsure what else to do, she made her way to Kurt's room.

She stood there for a few moments, looking at the door. She usually knocked, as he did on her door when he came to check on her in the middle of the night, but, she couldn't stay away from him any longer. She opened the door, creeping up to his bed and climbing in beside him.

"Kurt, are you awake?" She asked quietly, not wanting to wake him if he needed the sleep.

Kurt's eyes opened, and his hands went to her face, they moved all over her, as though trying to assure himself she was real.

"Kerri, du bist hier, es ist virklich sie, meine Liebe," he said, his hands still moving over her before he pulled her closer and kissed her. {Kerri, you're here, it's really you, my love}

Kerri kissed him back until they had to pull apart or air. "Kurt, I love you too," she told him, smiling.

"Kerri, I vas so vorried, vhat happened, vhere have you been?" He asked, looking down her, his hands now moving over her stomach. "Is zhe baby ok?"

Kerri shook her head. "I don't know what happened, but the baby's ok."

"It doesn't matter, you are both here now," he told her, holding her against him tightly as he moved his hand over her stomach.

Kerri smiled and cuddled against him, thinking she felt tears moving down his cheeks.

It was a while later that Kerri had to get up, having to go to the bathroom, she was sure, so she stood and made her way to the door and out into the hall, sneaking into the boy's dorm bathroom.

Helenia suddenly came to, standing in the hall outside of the bathroom in the boy's dorm. She blushed and looked around with wide eyes, wondering why she was there, of all places before she hurried back to her room in the guest wing.

---

Kerri had woken up back in that terrible room, and became agitated when she thought about what had happened. Had she been dreaming? Was she that desperate to see Kurt?

She knew the answer to that was yes, but she still felt stupid for believing it. She grumbled and tested her boundaries around for a while before she felt worn out and laid on the bed for a nap.

It turned out that this dreaming that she was able to see Kurt happened every night, tormenting her with the thought of being able to see him, but only for a little bit, and only in her dreams.

This time, when she woke up, she saw the door, open and waiting for her, as though calling her to come get lost in non-reality. She paused for only a moment before making her way to Kurt's room.

Kerri opened the door and crept across the floor, climbing into Kurt's bed. He had been staring at the ceiling, but now, he turned and pulled her close, and, as always, they held each other for a moment, Kurt stroking her growing stomach, until, like always, Kerri started crying into his chest.

"Liebling," he pulled her chin up and kissed her. "Bitte, don't cry..."

She looked up into his eyes, then nuzzled her face back to his chest, taking the little comfort she could from the dream. "I'll try, I just-" she fought a sob down. "I don't know where I am, I've been trying to get out, but there's bars on the windows, the walls are cement, I swear I've been bricked in, no matter what I try I only hurt myself, and there's no damage to the walls! I try to get out every day, it seems like forever- I don't even know how long I've been here!"

Kurt pulled her closer, and she could feel the tears coming from his eyes to wet her hair now. "Almost two monzhs."

She looked up at him, shocked. "Two months?! It can't have- that long... Kurt..." She buried her head in his chest again, trying to control her sobs. There was no way that she had been gone for that long, in fact, the only time she ever had seen night is when she had come to Kurt's room, in her sleep, she supposed that it could have been only one very long day, or that she was being kept in Alaska while the sun was in the position where it didn't actually go down... "Please, Kurt, please find us, I can't get out, please save us... I don't know what's happening..." She felt the pleading, almost begging tone in her throat, and it choked her.

Kerri felt the tears that were running down his face onto her hair as her held he close. "I vill find you, no matter vhat," he told her.

She cried, he cried, she woke up, to the same stupid, horrible room she'd been in forever, or two months, if dream Kurt was correct.

How could she possibly have been gone for two months? It didn't make any real kind of sense, except to explain that her stomach was expanding a little at a time, and she didn't know what to do with the thought. Maybe her brain was starting to slip, starting to lose grip on reality, only thinking a lot of time had passed, or that none had...

She got up and made her way around the room for the at least hundredth time, trying to find some weak point, something that she could break through or take advantage of to escape, but still found nothing, so she circled the room with her hands on her stomach, tears raining down her face as she tried to comfort herself and the baby.

Finally, she couldn't take it anymore and laid down, crying herself to sleep.

When her eyes opened, she saw that the room was shrouded in darkness.

She climbed from the mattress she was on and went to the door.

It didn't budge when she tried to open it.

No, this was wrong, it was a dream, it shouldn't be locked...

She hit the door and heard the thud of solid wood, but something beyond it, an emptiness...

She stepped back and looked at the door.

It had made a noise.

It had never done that before.

Maybe she could get out...

She closed her eyes and took a breath, backing up and carefully throwing her shoulder against the door. Of course, the only thing that happened was that she hurt her shoulder.

Kerri's eyes moved into a glare.

'No door is going to keep me from Kurt, nothing will keep me from him...' She thought to herself, steadying her body with her hand on her stomach.

She took a deep breath to center herself, just as Logan had taught her, and she let it out, becoming even with the environment around her.

She took a breath in, gathering the power of the environment around her, breathed out, letting empty space out, breathing in, gathering more strength, out, the empty space to fill with more strength...

Her eyes snapped open, and she gathered all of the energy to her foot. She wrapped her arms around her stomach and turned to the side to protect it, then kicked, stomping on the door.

She felt it rattle beneath her foot, and she wound up again, kicking against the door, next to the handle, focusing on the weak point.

She heard a cracking, and she stood into her stance again. 'One more, that'll do it,' she told herself and the baby, looking down to her stomach. 'We'll see him, don't worry...' "Fuck this door!" she yelled as she kicked, and the wood at the door jamb splintered, letting the door swing open freely.

She made her way to Kurt's room, unsure of how much of her dream she'd wasted with the stupid door.

He was asleep when she'd gotten to his room, but woke as she pulled herself close to him. "Kerri," he smiled.

She burrowed against him, kissing his chest. "I love you."

"I love you, too, Kerri," he said, holding her close and stroking her stomach. "You've gotten so big," he whispered.

"I wish this was real, so you could feel it kicking," she murmured.

Kurt's hand went to her cheek. "Kerri, Professor Xavier said zhat ve might actually be talking in our dreams, zhat it could be due to a connection..."

Kerri looked up at him, leaning closer to kiss his lips for comfort. "I- I hope so... Or it could just be from going insane..."

Kurt's hand ran down her side as he pulled her closer, kissing her.

It moved past that, and they pulled closer to each other, trying to forget about the pain and what was happening and lose themselves in each other, if only for a few moments before returning to reality.

Kurt held Kerri close as her breathing slowed, she could feel herself falling asleep, lulled by the beating in his chest, his smell, his warmth, his hand drifting over their unborn child, safely tucked between them as everything faded...

The walls look ever the same as she opened her eyes.

The floor looked ever the same.

The door looked ever the same.

The window looked ever the same.

She was going ever insane.

Kerri stood up and went to the window, pounding on it, trying to break the glass, anything.

She couldn't stand it here any longer, and with Kurt only being visible in her dreams, she was sure she was slowly going crazy, she needed him as much as she needed air, water, food, and she only got to see him in pretend places for a short time.

Even if they were really talking, which she hoped for, but wasn't sure if she believed, they weren't really together.

She started pacing quickly from one side of the room to the other, her hands digging through her hair, tears pouring down her face as she sobbed.

---

Logan sat in the kitchen, swigging from his beer, thinking about what Kurt had said.

Did it make sense that Helenia was really Kerri?

No, but what ever did make sense in this world?

It was possible that his friend had gone off the deep end, but was it as possible that maybe Kurt was right?

Helenia walked into the kitchen, smiling politely to him as she went to the fridge and pulled out a pitcher of water and poured some into a glass.

She always seemed so timid, scared of him, and he couldn't help but think of the first time he'd seen Kerri; she was small, in the body of a six year old, but her eyes had been steel, nothing was getting through, and he could tell, one wrong move from anyone and she wasn't afraid to defend herself. He couldn't help but think that Kerri's eyes would never have slid away from him in fear like Helenia's did.

He looked carefully into her eyes as she glanced at him, made even more nervous by his staring. He could see the color that had been flooding into the brown of her eyes, and he recognized it as the same color that had stared at him, trying to figure him out before he attacked so many hours during training.

Kurt walked into the kitchen, going up to Helenia, intent on pushing her farther.

For the whole two days since the meeting, he'd been talking to Helenia about the things Kerri did, trying to spark some memory.

He stood next to her, starting, "did I tell you zhat Kerri is afraid of heights? But she is brave, she vould go up on zhe high vire vizh me und valk across." The only response was her polite nod as she swallowed from her glass. "Did I tell you zhat ve," he glanced at Logan, who was watching them with an eyebrow raised. He leaned closer, whispering into her ear, "zhat ve had sex." Helenia choked on her water in embarrassment at that, holding the glass in front of her and coughing. Kurt pulled back, speaking in a normal volume. "She is pregnant, about five monzh, now," Kurt told her.

Suddenly, Helenia stopped coughing, mid cough, as though there was no water stuck in her lungs, her hand drifting to her stomach.

Logan's head rose in interest as the blue-green color flashed out, overflowing and drowning any brown. A smell surrounded her, not a bad smell, just something different, familiar.

He swiftly moved from the table and sniffed her, but a second later, the brown came back, the coughing started again, as though she was dying, and she turned, leaving the kitchen saying, "Excuse me..."

Kurt stood still, unsure of what had just happened, and Logan looked over to him. "I smelled her." Kurt's brow raised at him in question. "The Kid, I smelled her. Kerri may be in there after all..." Kurt nodded, and they shared a look of determined camaraderie.

---

Helenia sat with the others in the kitchen, eating midnight ice cream, smiling as Ororo, Jean, and Hank talked to each other, but not really contributing much to the conversation, focused on the frozen goodness in front of her.

She suddenly looked up as there was a pause in the conversation. "Hey, do you know what would make this ice cream better?" She asked, and they shook their heads in polite question.

"What were you thinking?" Hank asked.

"Do you have any canned tuna?" She asked.

Stunned and disturbed silence filled the table, and Jean slowly shook her head. "No, I don't think so..."

"Hm," Helenia hummed as she turned back to her bowl.

"That is a strange request, are you feeling ok, Helenia? Do you usually eat tuna on your ice cream?" Hank asked.

"No, I just thought it sounded good for some reason. And pickles in fudge sauce," she said, stirring the contents of her bowl slightly.

"Sounds like pregnant woman food," Ororo commented, and the three turned to each other, looks of surprise, shock, or weirded out on their faces.

Maybe Kurt wasn't so far off with his 'Helenia is Kerri' idea...

---

Somehow, Helenia's father had found out she was sleep walking again. He was angry, and he'd taken hold of her hand, pulling her to Professor Xavier's office, convincing him to let them use the room for her treatment. So there they stood, alone in the office.

After the door was closed and locked, Dr. Randalf dragged Helenia over to a couch and all but threw her on to it. "Lay back," he told her. She obeyed and stared at the ceiling. "I'm sorry if I seem angry, Helenia," he told her, sounding calmer after having taken a few breaths. "I'm just worried for your safety, I remember when you were little and you tried to fly out of your window, and when you almost got hit by that semi truck in front of the house."

"Why was a semi truck on our road?" She asked in confusion, imagining the little road that was almost too small for two cars to pass each other.

Dr. Randalf's face turned red again. "Silence," he told her harshly, then started again. "Silence is important for this, we need to go back into your mind, your subconscious... Close your eyes and relax, I'm going to count backwards from twenty. Twenty- Nineteen- Eighteen- Seventeen," he continued counting, at ten he started going slower, taking a pouch out of his pocket and pulling the strings apart and out of the fabric.

He wadded up the pouch itself and stuffed it into her mouth, the cords tying her hands together behind her back and her feet together as she sank further into subconsciousness, then finally he took a strap and tightened it around her mouth just to be sure there would be little to no noise. "- One. You are deep, deep asleep, Helenia."

A shiver of image flowed across her body, her hair growing longer and lightening to a sandy strawberry blond, her skin changing hue, but not too notably, she grew a few inches, her form filling out the rest of the way to a full, pregnant belly, then her eyes snapped open, now a lighter blue-green color.

Her first reaction was to growl and lunge at Dr. Randalf, but he put his hand on her breast bone and she couldn't move too far.

"I hear you've been making trouble again," he told her calmly, a sadistic smile turning the corners of his mouth up. "Looks like I'll have to make trouble for you," he threatened, leaning over her a little, pausing as she tried to talk to him through the gag. "I'd rather not," he told her, interpreting her muffled and gagged speech perfectly after so many times of hearing it. "And, now I'll have to punish you for your filthy mouth, as well," he told her. His eyes darkened and he glared into her eyes. "Are you going to let me in this time, or struggle?"

Kerri felt a growl in her throat and said, muffled, "Huh ooo."

"Oh, good, a struggle. I like those better. And I don't know, Fuck me? Would you like that? I might be able to get into it if your little blue boyfriend was watching as you squirm, unable to do anything, but it might hurt your baby. Of course, that'd just be gravy." Kerri glared at him. "Oh, maybe I should go get him right now? We could try it." Kerri blinked in confusion. "He's just in the other room, I'm sure. Oh, what's wrong, don't realize where you are?"

Kerri looked around, recognizing for the first time where she was; Professor Xavier's office. She started yelling at him through the muffle, but he just slapped her. She started yelling again, and he smiled.

"Don't think you can tell me what to do any more than your little blue boyfriend can," he told her, slapping her again. "Remember, I have control over you because I have control over your baby's life. I could end it any time I wanted. Right now, even."

He hit her again and again, punching her where it wouldn't make too much sound, then grabbed her hair and hit her head on the wooden arm of the couch she was on, an evil grinning smirk on his mouth as he got into it, eventually leaning down and choking her until she had almost passed out.

Kerri kept her eyes closed, not wanting to see the pleasure he was deriving from what he was doing, refusing to cry out and give him any more.

After a bit, he stopped the physical attack and Kerri could feel the tears in the corners of her eyes pooling, still not big enough to roll down her cheek.

He grabbed her chin roughly and turned her face to him. "Enough foreplay," he told her. "Let's do this. Look at me." She didn't open her eyes. "Look at me!" He demanded again. She opened her eyes, pouring hate out of them at him. "Better," he told her. "Now fight me," he told her, pushing against her mind.

She did fight, because she was never one to give up, and she knew that, unlike the physical damage, if he managed to get into her mind, whatever had been happening before would start happening again, and she hated that room he'd put her in, it's stupid walls, floor, door, window that no one ever passed. Wherever it was, she hated it and wanted to destroy it, almost as much as she wanted to destroy him.

He pushed harder against her mind, and she felt him leaning over her, his chest touching hers as he pushed harder.

An involuntary whimper left her mouth, muffled by the gag, and his smile widened. Her eyes wanted to close, she wanted to blink so bad. It was so tempting to just close her eyes and forget it, but she had to be strong.

That's when she felt it, the probing hardness that was his mind.

She fought, pushing him away, but he didn't budge.

She felt him start to enter her brain tissue, ripping still tender mental walls, and slammed her eyes shut, tears now pouring down the side of her face as a thought of the uselessness of her fight entered her mind. He was going to win anyway, just as he had last time, and the time before, and before that. He had utter control, all he had to do was threaten to hurt her baby and she had to give in; save her baby. She knew he only didn't bring it up yet because he liked the fight, got some sick pleasure out of it.

He was tearing through her not yet healed, tender mental walls slowly but roughly, as though stopping to tear off all of the band aids and scabs to cause her more pain.

She was screaming, she knew she was screaming, the pain was almost overwhelming, how could she not scream? And no matter what she did, it just hurt more.

This wasn't right, he shouldn't be able to do this to her in Professor Xavier's office, when the X-Men were so close, in her own house, when Kurt was on the other side of that door somewhere.

She fought, but ended up running, trying to build enough walls to keep him out.

Finally it was just darkness around her, no lights, and he was coming. His head was huge to her perspective, only able to see his face.

He was a shadow, moving around her, she couldn't get away. She backed away, from where she heard his laughter, then, suddenly, there was a door, her safe place door.

She moved away from it, not wanting the temptation, but a hand pushed her from behind, his laugh echoed all around her, the ground tilted and she was falling through the air, the nothing, the darkness, until she saw the doorway fly past her and slam in her face as everything blackened.

Dr. Randalf laughed as the body half under him went still with neither of the girls in control. "Helenia," he called, and a wave of image passed over the body as Helenia was brought to the foreground. "I have some important information for you. That boy, Kurt, the blue, terrifying one. He's too close, stay away from him. And if he says anything sounding like he's suspicious about you being Kerri again... Kill him."

---

Kerri rolled over on her bed, taking the book with her, holding it above her head as she tried to get comfortable on her bed with her big, pregnant belly.

She looked over at the door as a knock sounded, her brow cocking in question.

She looked around the room, same purple walls, same desk and bookcases. She wasn't sure why she would look around the room as she wondered who would be at the door, but she put down the book, hauling herself up before she moved toward the door.

"Hello?" Came the voice from behind the door. It was light and feminine, one that Kerri didn't recognize. "Is anyone in there?"

Kerri stopped in front of the door. "Who's there?"

"My name is Helenia... What is your name?"

Kerri stepped closer to the door but didn't open it. "It's Kerri."

"Kerri? T- the teacher who ran away?" The voice asked.

"What do you mean ran away? I'm right here," she said.

"I heard that Kerri ran away, and left Kurt without hesitation..." The girl on the other side of the door told her. "I heard that Kerri was... Not a very nice person..."

Kerri glared at the door. "That's not true, I'm- not... a terrible person..." Her anger fell and she turned, biting her knuckle. "Am I?"

"I heard that you were very mean to Kurt, and that you chased a boy away from the school, he never came back... And that you used to... work at a strip club..." Helenia said the last words as though they were dirty. "Even though Kurt still loved you. And that you were breaking rules about going out with him while he was a teacher and you were a student, potentially putting him in danger of being fired, without a care for what happened to him..."

Yeah... Put that way, it really did sound bad...

"Did you really do all those things?" Helenia asked.

"Yes," Kerri murmured. "And more..."

"And... Did you make Scott think you were eating Jean during your final?" Helenia asked tentatively.

"I did," she answered.

"And did you... Enjoy it?" Helenia asked, sounding a little afraid of the answer. "His pain?"

Kerri didn't say anything for a moment, then admitted, "yes..."

There was a gasp from behind the door. "You- you really are a bad person..." Helenia said, and Kerri could hear her stepping away from the door.

Kerri turned to the door. "I'm not," she said, half pleadingly.

"What have you been doing in there all this time?" Helenia asked.

"R-reading," Kerri told her, confused.

"While Kurt is out looking for you every night? Getting himself seriously hurt while doing it?" Helenia asked in shock. "Selfish, you're a selfish, horrible person..."

Kerri heard her running away from the door. "I'm not," Kerri said. "I'm not. I swear I'm not," she called after her. "Am I?" She quietly asked herself and the baby as she looked down to her stomach.

---

Kurt had been trying for a few days to get Helenia in a place where he could prod her with more questions, wanting to see if he could get Kerri to come forward again, but she managed to stay away from him, her eyes stayed brown, and Kerri didn't visit him at night.

He found Helenia in the kitchen one night, finishing a pickle dipped in chocolate sauce before bed. "Hallo, Helenia," he greeted, trying not to gag at the thought of what the pickle tasted like. He knew it was something from Kerri, a craving that was feeding his baby.

She turned to look at him, hiding her deer in the headlights look as she ate the last bite. "Um, hello, Kurt..."

"I vas just vondering, how are you getting along here?" He asked.

"I'm, doing well," she answered, obviously nervous.

"Vell, zhat is good," Kurt said, stepping closer to her.

She wanted to step back, but her legs, they wouldn't move. She didn't know what he wanted, but she found herself suddenly wishing it was to kiss her. Confusion entered her mind and she felt a blush rise on her cheeks as she looked down.

Kurt paused in his assault on her mind, seeing the blush creep up her face, and got an idea. "Helenia, vhat do you zhink about me?"

"I- I'm sorry?" She asked in surprise.

"Vhat do you zhink about me?" Kurt asked again. "Do you zhink I am good looking, is zhe hologram besser, do you like my sense of humor?"

"I- I'm sure you're a lovely person..."

"Ja, aber, how do you feel about me?" he asked, stepping closer.

"Um, I..." She stuttered as the blush on her cheeks got brighter.

He reached forward and tilted her chin up, keeping a careful watch on her eyes. "It's ok, it is just a quvestion. You don't have to feel so nervous," he told her.

Helenia looked into his eyes, stepping closer to him. "I- I-"

She was about to say something, Kurt knew it, and was it just him, or were her eyes starting to lighten?

The sound of footsteps echoed in the hallway outside, and Helenia pulled away from him, suddenly turning and hurrying out of the room.

Kurt watched her go, wondering if he had been getting through to Kerri.

Helenia stood in front of her mirror, trying to figure out what to do.

On the one hand, she was very interested in Kurt, even if he scared her a little...

On the other hand, he was engaged, to a pregnant woman(!), and even though she was not a very good person, and Helenia wanted him to herself, she couldn't steal him...

It would be wrong.

She laid down in bed, getting comfortable, then, without knowing why, she started counting backwards. "Twenty, nineteen, eighteen, seventeen..."

Kerri was laying on her bed with her feet raised on a pillow, staring at the ceiling. She was still thinking about what the girl from the night before had said, trying to think if she was really such a terrible person.

"K- Kerri," came a voice at the door.

Kerri struggled, but her feet landed on the floor as she stood up. "What?"

"Do- do you mind if I talk to you?"

Kerri walked to the door and leaned against it. "What do you want?"

"It- it's- it's about Kurt..." Helenia admitted.

Kerri was silent for a moment. "What about him?"

"He- um... He's really cute..."

Kerri's interest perked and she half turned to the door, her hand going to her stomach. "Yes, he is..."

"And... I mean... What have you been doing in here this whole time?" Helenia asked again.

"Reading, just like I told you yesterday," Kerri answered.

"All day? After all I told you about him trying to find you, you just sit in there and continue to let him suffer? What kind of a fiancee are you?"

Kerri turned and smacked the door. "Hey, I've been here the whole time, if he wanted to find me, he knows where I am! It's not like he's never been to my room before, and it's not like I'd refuse to see him! I love him!" she yelled through the door. "And you better not be getting any funny ideas in your head about him! He's engaged and has a baby on the way!"

"He deserves someone better than you!" Helenia told her. "Not someone who is too busy reading in her room to even go see if he is ok when he's obviously hurting!"

"That may be, but he picked me!" Kerri told her. "I didn't force him to ask me to marry him! I said no the first time!"

"Oh, didn't you trick him into thinking he was in love with you? There are people who know the truth!" Helenia told her.

"Get away from my door! I don't want to hear your voice while I'm in my room!" Kerri yelled. "And keep your stupid "propaganda" thoughts about me to yourself, you don't know what you're talking about!"

Helenia stopped and took a breath. "What am I even fighting for?" She asked herself. "We- I'm not really having this conversation right now; this is just what I think she'd say to me..."

"Hey, I said get away from my door with all of your crazy mutterings!" Kerri said, smacking the door again.

"We're not having this conversation, and I'm not outside of your room! You're not real, I hypnotized myself, I really did it!" Helenia said to herself. "And I can't get away from your room, because I don't know where your room is, this is all just my subconscious talking; you're not real!"

"The Hell I'm not real," Kerri told her, but she was leaving. "The Hell I'm not real," Kerri repeated to her stomach.

Her head was starting to hurt, and her hand drifted to it.

"I'm as real as- ah!- This migraine I'm getting," Kerri mumbled, making her way to her bed and laying down. "Oww, oh God, this hurts... This sucks..." She turned, closing her eyes against the light as her head throbbed more. "I swear my head's going to split open..."

An image flashed through her mind; a man with dark, evil eyes.

Kerri's eyes flew open, fear in them. "What was that?" She asked herself. She closed her eyes again, waiting for anything else to come.

The man again.

His demonic grin as he hit her.

His laugh as he told her to fight him.

The terrible threats he'd made about her baby. Kerri's hand tightened on her stomach.

A lab of some sort. A room, white walls, red carpet, blue curtains.

Waking up and knowing she had to escape, trying to gather supplies for the journey, only to see them disappear.

She woke up in the room, white walls, red carpet, blue curtains. It was very early, the sun hadn't quite come up yet. She hurried to the door and tried it. No one was around, she made her way down the stairs and found keys, going outside and getting into the vehicle. Driving, driving, and driving until she felt very sleepy, then-

Nothing.

The room again. The evil man hitting her, taunting her, locking her away some how.

Another room, different, beigeish walls, beigeish door, beigeish carpet, but, the same lay out, the same window, with the same nothing outside of it. Fighting in that room, one time finding the door unlocked. Kurt, going to Kurt's room and being with him, kissing him, thinking it was just a dream, begging him to find her and the baby...

The room, Kurt's room, the room, Kurt's room.

Waking up in a different room, the evil man over her. Realizing she was in Professor Xavier's office, wanting to call out to Kurt, let him know she was there. Being hit, a lot, as the evil man told her how she was causing problems, how he'd love to kill her, but needed her, how it would look strange if his daughter suddenly disappeared. How he could do things to her baby and make her watch, just because he wanted to. The terrible things he said he'd do. His saying that he'd thought he'd needed to get rid of the baby, but that it had turned out to be a helpful tool.

More pain, physical, damage to her body as he threatened to do worse things to her.

Mental pain this time, as he pushed his way in, practically raping her mind with his.

The doorway falling up past her head.

Darkness.

Her room.

Headache as her memory returned to her against the evil man's wishes.

Kerri opened her eyes and looked at the ceiling. 'The pretend ceiling,' she thought to herself. 'If that girl, Helenia thinks we're in her head... Maybe it's my head?'

---

Kerri sat on the bed, slouching against the wall in her fake room, steaming.

She'd peeked out a few times, trying to get a sense of what was going on out there, a good time to get out, a way to get Helenia out of her head. So far all she'd seen is that Helenia was perfect. And seemingly right about Kurt flirting with her, wanting her to go everywhere with him and hardly letting her away from his side.

She let out another angry and hurt sigh, her hand going to her stomach as though to comfort her baby.

Stupid Helenia, stealing her body and Kurt. And probably her real room with all of her stuff. And all the money she'd hidden in it. And all of her books.

Kerri's arm flew out, throwing the pillow across the room into the wall.

She couldn't pretend that she was happy Kurt had found someone to comfort him, after all, she was crying and hurt, she loved him so much that it bordered on pain when she thought about him with someone else, kissing, hugging, doing the things they did together.

Maybe she was too possessive? Maybe she really was like a bad influence on him? Maybe she was no good for him? Maybe she should give up? Maybe he deserved someone else, some one better?

Like perfect Helenia?

Kerri hid her eyes behind the palms of her hands as fresh tears came, knowing it wasn't the first time she'd thought of giving up to let Kurt have a better life.

---

Helenia laughed at a joke Kurt had told her as they climbed out of the van.

They'd gone to do the grocery shopping, unaware of the revelation Dr. Randalf had had about Kerri and her powers with Dr. McCoy, throwing him into the panic he was now in while waiting for them to return.

"Excuse me, Kurt, I need to speak to my daughter," Dr. Randalf interrupted him, making his way across the garage floor to her.

"Oh, father, I was just helping to bring in the groceries, can it wait a moment?" She asked.

"It can't," he told her. "I need to speak to you now."

Helenia's brow crinkled in confusion and she smiled apologetically as she was dragged away from Kurt.

Dr. Randalf closed the door behind him and walked into the middle of the ball room he'd taken Helenia to.

She'd wandered into the middle of the room, looking around as though she'd never seen a large empty room before. "Wow, it's so big!"

"Yes. It is," he told her, catching her arm and pulling her around to look at him.

She smiled uncertainly and asked, "what did you need to talk to me about, father?"

"They may be onto us, so I need to do something," he told her.

"On to us?" She asked in confusion. "About what?"

"Oh God, shut your stupid mouth for once. I guess it's really my fault, making you that way; too stupid to ask questions or come up with ideas," he said, talking to himself.

Helenia's eyes were wide. This was something she'd never expect to hear from him.

He took her face in his hands. "Don't worry, I'll wipe that memory out so you don't have to remember it."

"What- what are you talking about?" Helenia asked, too afraid to move.

"Just stand still, Helenia, I have to check on something in your mind," he told her, pressing into her brain easily, going to the back where three doors stood.

Kerri was still sitting on her bed, contemplating giving up when the door burst open.

Her head shot up and she saw the evil man there.

"So, that's why they're on to us, you've broken out of your cage again," he said, glaring at her with malice. She didn't say anything, just stared at him, startled by his sudden appearance. "How about I put you in a real cage?" He was across the room before Kerri could react, and he'd grabbed onto her arm, throwing her off of the bed onto the floor. She stared up at him in horror, at a loss as to what he was doing in her mind.

He picked her up by the hair, slamming her into the wall. "Won't that be nice?" He asked, slamming her against the wall again. "Your own little unbreakable cage. Maybe I'll drag you out there as well, so you can see everything that's going on. Then you can give birth to your baby like an animal at the zoo. If I don't kill the baby while I'm beating you, that is."

Kerri felt the weakness and helplessness trying to cover her, the hopeless tears trying to form in her eyes, but as he threw her across the room into the desk, knocking the chair over, the shoe box hidden there fell loose of it's hiding place, spilling it's contents across the floor.

He was still talking, she knew, but she wasn't listening, instead she was looking at the pictures on the floor.

Kurt and her, standing together at the dance, the group picture of the two of them with Kitty and Piotr, the ultrasound.

"No," she whispered to herself. 'I refuse to let him hurt me, I refuse to believe I'm helpless, or weak.' Flashes of how she'd had to live before coming to the mansion flooded her mind. 'I'm not helpless, I've survived on my own. I'm not weak, Wolverine trained me to fight. I have to protect my baby.'

"What did you say?" Dr. Randalf asked as he got closer. Kerri looked over her shoulder at him, hate sparking in her eyes. "I thought you said something, but it couldn't be, poor little helpless baby, tripped over a chair. Let me help you up," he reached down and grabbed her shoulder, bruising it as he yanked her up.

He'd made a cage while she hadn't been listening to him, and now, he pulled her over to it, trying to stuff her in, but she kicked it away.

"Maybe I'll put you in that cage instead," she told him.

"Maybe you're a little brat who needs to learn some manners before I kill you and that bastard child of yours," he told her, throwing her to where she'd kicked the cage. "Maybe I'll make Kurt fall in love with Helenia and make you watch as they live happily ever after, while you rot inside your own mind!" He told her, advancing menacingly.

"Maybe you should go suck your own genitalia!" Kerri yelled, kicking him in the knee hard enough that the small bone broke and he fell over. "Only takes ten pounds of pressure to break the patella, you know," she told him. "And you can't walk without it!"

She straightened from leaning against the cage and took it, dragging it away from him, but he stood again.

"You stupid little fool, you think you're so smart, but you know nothing of mental fighting! Any wounds here aren't real, all I have to do is remember that and I can stand and move as I please!" He came towards her, and she made her way out of the door, dragging the cage behind her to block the door way.

He pushed the cage out, making his way through the door. "I'm stronger than you, older than you, I have more experience than you, and I'll put you in this cage like the dirty little rat you are," he told her, moving forward to grab her.

She dodged, leaning on the cage to get her leg up and kicking him in the chest, though her body wasn't wanting to follow all of her directions, now encumbered with a large weight in her stomach that pushed against her body and rearranged her internal organs. She didn't waste time or energy with coming up with a comeback, just took a stance, praying for her baby's safety through this. When he came for her again, she grabbed his arm and threw him to the ground, keeping his arm so he couldn't get away, but suddenly, instead of an arm, it was a snake. She was startled, but held on. "Ha," she laughed at him. "I'm not afraid of snakes."

He whipped his arm back, throwing her off of him and stood. "What are you afraid of?" He asked. "That Kurt dosn't love you, right? Well he doesn't, he won't, anyway, after I get done with him, he won't even remember you exist."

Kerri smirked. "I don't plan to let you out to do that," she told him. "And as for fear... I am fear," she told him boldly.

"You're a scared little girl hiding in her mind from the real world," he shot back. "I saw the door, you could have gotten out any time, but you didn't. Scared." He rushed to her, catching her hair as she moved out of the way, and hit her head against the bars of the cage. "Stupid little scared bitch."

"Father, father, what are you doing?!" Helenia cried, afraid to get close to the fight.

"Shut your stupid mouth, you unbearable little hussy! You can't follow instructions enough to stay away from the ONE person I told you to stay away from!" Dr. Randalf yelled at her, making her stand there silently in shock.

Kerri slipped one leg back, kicking him in the shin hard enough that his foot slid out from under him, making him fall to his knee. She stood up, grabbing the back of his head and slamming it against the cage.

There was a disruption, some wavering movement over the walls of her mind and Kerri looked around, trying to figure it out.

It was the distraction Dr. Randalf needed to get out of her grasp and lock her hand to the cage with a set of handcuffs. "It wasn't what I was hoping for, but it'll have to do for now," he said, disappearing.

Kerri looked down at her hand, then around, noticing that Helenia was gone too.

---

"I asked, vhat are you doing to her?" Kurt repeated, a threatening tone in his voice.

"Nothing, she is my daughter, and I just wanted to check on her well being," Dr. Randalf answered.

"I don't doubt zhat. Vhat vere you doing to Kerri and our baby?" he asked, his eyes narrowing.

Helenia was just standing in place in shock, tears running down her face as she tried to put together what had happened, and what was happening now. "W- what happened, father, did you really say those things?" She asked quietly, but was ignored.

"I asked vhat you vere doing to Kerri!" Kurt yelled at Dr. Randalf, clenching his fists.

"Young man, there is no Kerri here, or a baby, it's just us; you, me, and Helenia," Dr. Randalf tried to tell him soothingly.

"Zhe Hell zhere isn't," Kurt told him. "I know vhat you've done, vhere Kerri is!"

Dr. Randalf's expression changed. "Helenia," he snapped, and she looked up at him. "Remember what I told you, the orders I gave you."

Helenia's gaze turned forward, toward Kurt, and her eyes were dull, lifeless.

Kerri looked up as Dr. Randalf spoke. What orders had he given her?

She heard as though a computer was running the process, repeating the words he'd spoken; "And if he says anything sounding like he's suspicious about you being Kerri again... Kill him."

"K- kill him?" Kerri sputtered, blown away.

Helenia stepped forward and stopped.

"Helenia, vhat are you doing?" Kurt asked. "Vhat ever he ordered you to do, you don't have to do es," he told her.

"Wrong," Dr. Randalf told him. "She's running on autopilot now, she can't stop herself. Won't it be wonderful? Kerri will be forced to watch her body kill you," he laughed evilly.

"You don't know her, she vouldn't," Kurt told him.

"She doesn't have a choice; she can't stop herself. So she'll kill you, or you'll have to kill her. And the baby." He laughed again as Kurt warily watched Helenia take another step towards him and stop. "It will be so perfect!"

---

Xavier sat at his desk, looking through his normal paperwork, when there was a frantic beeping from the screen that appeared on the wall. A burst of white, appeared, and he froze for a second before putting his fingers to his temples and calling the others.

---

Kerri pulled on the hand cuffs, shouting, "It's all pretend, in my head, it's not real!" The cuffs broke, letting her free, and she shoved Helenia into the room behind her and closed the door, yelling, "get out of my way!"

There was a moment of nothing, then she turned to Dr. Randalf slowly.

His eyes widened as he watched her.

A smile meant to terrify slipped slowly up her lips as her eyes lit up with revenge.

Her hand flew forward, knocking the breath from him as it connected with his stomach. "You." She punched him again, knocking him back against the wall. "You are the one," she wound her leg back and kicked him in the stomach, "who tried to kill," she took his shirt and threw him to the ground, punching him in the back of the head, "OUR BABY!" She yelled the last part with rage.

Kurt had been frozen in shock at what had happened, but now he looked at them in surprise. "He is zhe vone who did it?" he asked.

"He made someone else do it," she said, squatting down and picking him up by the front of his suit. "Who's the coward there?" She mocked.

Kurt blinked, absorbing this information as Kerri let the smile creep back onto her face as she let him go. "Go on, try to run away," she whispered.

He scrambled to his feet, backing away from her, turning and running for the door at the other side of the room.

Kerri leapt across the distance, shifting as she did, landing on him, going full out horror movie monster on him, hollow shadows of eyes and mouth, sharp needley teeth poking out from the gaping hole, decaying half wings sprouting from her back, shredding her shirt.

"I told you," she half whispered, half growled. "I am fear."

Dr. Randalf stared at her in horror, unable to speak.

Kerri stood, shifting to her battle form, her tail moving up to wrap around his neck.

"Kerri, vhat are you doing?" Kurt asked, taking a halting step toward them.

Kerri pulled him to his feet, the dark look still on her face. "Just helping the man up," she answered.

Kurt stepped closer, but paused, nervous about what she was doing.

Kerri took off flying around the room, circling it and going to the roof, Dr. Randalf riding along on her tail, choking as she hung from the ceiling, pulling him close enough to whisper the most terrifying things she could think of.

She noticed his arms fall, his body going limp. "Oh, did you almost die yet?" She asked, loosening her tail and letting him fall to the floor.

He landed in a pile as the uncostumed X-Men crowded into the doorway.

Kerri looked up from where she'd landed, next to Dr. Randalf's unconscious body.

"Oh my God, what has she done?" Scott gasped.

Jean and Hank didn't say anything, not sure what to say.

Kurt stepped toward her. "Kerri, vhy did you do zhat?"

The panic set in. This wasn't real. It wasn't, no way. She'd never be able to kill that bastard, especially not so easily, he'd just been messing around in her head, she was still in her head. This was all a part of his plan to torture her...

A sob rose in her chest, but she stifled it, flapping her wings to charge the door and make it through as they all stepped out of her way.

---

Kerri sat on the roof over the doors to the school. She'd tried to fly longer, but she was too worn out. She'd thought about leaving, running away, but she didn't know where to go. 'How pathetic,' she thought to herself, stroking her stomach. 'I once ran away from home, lived and took care of myself on the streets... Now I'm too afraid to leave...'

There was a Bamf as Kurt appeared, crouching next to her. She looked over at him, startled as she shifted back to her regular body form. "H- how did you find me?"

Kurt put his hand out, but she shied away. "Liebling, I- I heard you crying from zhe ground. It's breaking mein hertz..."

Kerri hurriedly wiped her eyes, "Oh..." They were silent for another second as she wiped her eyes again, but then she all but leapt into his arms. "Oh Kurt," she tried to gain control over her sobbing. "I- I-"

"Shhh, it is ok, liebling," he whispered, smoothing his hand down her back. "I am here, you are here, it vill be ok."

'Kurt, have you found Kerri?' Xavier asked, most likely from his office.

'Ja, I have her here,' Kurt answered.

'Good. Please bring her to my office when you finish your reunion, I want to make sure she is ok.' Xavier explained.

'No problem, Professor,' Kurt told him, noticing that Kerri had pulled away, a slightly panicked look in her eye. "Vhat's wrong, liebling?" he asked.

Kerri shook her head gently, an embarrassed smile tinging her lips. "N- nothing, just zoning out, I guess," she assured him.

Kurt cupped her cheek in his hand, staring into her eyes, but she looked away nervously. He brought his cheek close to hers and their heads touched. "I'm so glad to see you again, I love you, Kerri," he told her.

"I love you, too, Kurt," she answered.

He pulled back and looked to her face again. "Zhe professor vants to see you, just to make sure zhat you are ok," he told her, looking down at her ruined shirt. "Maybe ve should stop by your room so you can change," he suggested.

"No," she said, a little too quickly. "That's ok. I- I'm sure it's fine," she covered, looking down and blushing at how much skin was showing.

"Vell- vell, here," he took off his shirt and handed it to her. "You can vear zhis for now, ok, liebling?"

Kerri nodded and pulled off the scraps of her shirt, throwing them over the side of the building before putting on Kurt's shirt. She looked up to see him looking at her strangely. "D- does it look ok?" she asked.

"Ja, it looks fine," he told her. "Do you mind if I give you a lift down?" He asked, offering his arm.

---

It was hard, dealing with Helenia still being there, trying to figure out how to feel normal, but Xavier and Jean worked together to put the memories behind Kerri so she could move on, and she and Helenia had a tentative understanding strengthened by the two psychics removing the fact that she loved Kurt as well from Kerri's mind.

Of course, nothing could keep that hidden for long, especially with Scott seeming to be intent on ruining her happy mood.

It took a while for her to calm down after that, and she wouldn't speak to the perpetrators for a few weeks, still refusing to acknowledge Helenia's attempts to talk to her.

It changed though, when Kurt was called out to a mission one day. She was in the lab with Dr. McCoy, trying to relax while he checked the baby's heartbeat, when the call came in for him to be ready for injuries.

Dr. McCoy raced into action, and Kerri helped the best she could with her large waddling frame, getting bags of blood and saline ready.

They arrived, and Jean helped Hank pull the machines and hook Kurt up, setting up emergency procedures, Cyclops stood out of the way, ready to do anything he was directed to.

Kerri was shocked to see the state that he was in, and tears sprang to her eyes.

Wolverine saw how Kerri was reacting and went to her, holding onto her arm, keeping her from falling or running to Kurt, as she would have, had she been free to move.

"It's bad," Kerri muttered, tears streaming down her face. 'No, no no no... he can't go... He can't leave me... The baby's due in a couple of months...'

'It's ok, Kerri,' Helenia tried to comfort her. 'They're experienced, I'm sure it'll be alright.'

'No, it's not going well, he's lost a lot of blood, they have to get the bullet out before they can close him, he's bleeding too much... Do they have enough of the right type to put into him?' Kerri thought back, panic giving an edge to her voice, even though she stood still, tears pouring down her face as she sobbed, held up by Wolverine's hands as he, too, silently worried.

'But, I can help him,' Helenia told her.

"What are you talking about?" Kerri asked through sobs, forgetting that she could think to her.

'I can help him, I'm a healer. I can heal him,' Helenia told her.

"No you can't, even if you could heal him," Kerri choked a little. 'He's so... far... My baby is going to born without a father...'

'Kerri, listen to me. I can heal him. I at least have to try,' Helenia said.

'What would stop you from just taking over my body and hurting him more, or leaving and going out to meet Dr. Randalf?'

'Kerri, I love him, too, remember? I have to try to help him, even if I die from it,' Helenia told her, a tinge of desperation in her voice.

"O- ok," Kerri told her, letting go of her body, slipping to kneel on the ground, only supported by Wolverine's hands as she tried to meditate fast enough that Helenia could take over and do some good.

Wolverine looked down at her, startled. "Kid," he said, pulling her back up.

A shiver of image rushed over her body, and Helenia stood in front of him. "Logan, please let me go," she said. "I have to save him." His grip didn't loosen as he looked at her suspiciously for a moment. "Please!" She begged. "I have to help him!"

He let her go, and she ran to the bed.

"Please move! Please get out of the way!" They slide a little out of the way, and Helenia pulled the blood soaked gauze from his side, putting her hands on his skin and closing her eyes.

She pushed, her side ripping open as she mended his organs and flesh as fast as she could.

Blood started running down her side as she pushed harder, closing the wound and pushing the bullet back to the surface, remembering what Kerri had said about needing to get it out.

Helenia started feeling light headed, taking a breath to steady herself so that she could continue.

"Stop," Cyclops told her, putting a hand on her shoulder, causing a slight glow, but Jean pulled him back.

"Don't touch her, you might cause something to happen," she told him, watching as Helenia's shoulder where he touched it stopped glowing.

'Harder,' Helenia thought, pushing and closing it faster. It was only about half an inch deep when she couldn't continue.

"He- he might need stitches, I didn't get it all," Helenia's side was wet with blood, and as she let go to move so they could continue on Kurt, she swayed, stumbling and falling to the side as she turned, landing on her back, her breathing shallow.

Logan pulled his cowl back and kneeled next to her. "Hey," he said, picking up her upper body. "Hey, Helenia."

Helenia opened her eyes, hazily looking up at him. "I didn't make it... I got as far as I could... I tried..." Logan didn't say anything, just held her up, knowing she was dizzy from blood loss. "I know it's all pretend... my life... but... at least I... gave it... to... save... him..." Helenia took a shuttering breath, gasping for a second, her muscles tensing and spasaming before her head fell back limply.

Logan put his fingers to her neck, feeling for a pulse.

"We're done, as far as we can be," Hank said, wiping his arm across his forehead.

"She has no pulse," Logan called out to them, and Jean hurried over, feeling her wrist and looking over the pale appearance, then over the puddles of blood where she'd spent more than a minute.

"She- she bled out, do we know what her blood type is? Do we have any O?" Jean asked, turning to Hank.

"No, we've got everything set up to Kurt," he said, looking at the puddles and over to Helenia's body. "But, if she's already gone... There's nothing we can do..."

Jean looked at her, crouching. "What about Kerri, the baby..." She moved her hands over Helenia's body, trying to sense where the baby was, but leaned back. "I... I can't feel it..."

Logan held Helenia as the scene of what had just happened went through his head again, not sure what to do with her. "She's dead." He shook her. "Kid, Kid! You still there?!" He shook her again.

Helenia's form didn't move, and Hank put his hand on his shoulder. "It- it was the body that died..." Logan glared at the lifeless body in his hands. "You know she would have- that she would have wanted to- to save him," he told him, and they looked up as the door opened and Xavier entered.

"What's happened?" He asked.

"Helenia- Kerri- They're dead," Cyclops told him, taking Jean's hand.

Jean pressed herself against him, looking down at Helenia's body as Logan stood and laid her on an empty bed.

"She's gone, Prof," Logan said, turning away and glaring angrily at one of the pools of blood.

Xavier bent his head and was silent for a moment. "How is Kurt?"

"He's in a rough patch, but it looks fairly good, thanks to-" Hank stopped, looking down.

"She- she did her best to save his life, she got the bullet out, even," Jean said, looking over in time to see a shiver of image pass over Kerri's body so she looked like herself again. She stepped closer, putting her head close to her face, but there was still no breath and she didn't move.

"At least she'll be able to look like herself when she's buried," Cyclops commented, not sure what to say.

Jean's hands hovered over Kerri, feeling around. "I feel the baby, we might be able to save it," she said, and Hank rushed to her side. They pulled clean instruments out and prepared for an emergency c- section. "Everyone back, Scott, clean towels, Logan, we need something like an incubator, sanitized," she delegated.

Xavier told Logan what to grab and Logan grabbed a bottle of rubbing alcohol to sanitize it.

Jean pulled on a clean mask and a fresh set of gloves snapped against her wrists. She prepped the area by rubbing the anti septic over it, killing the germs so they wouldn't get on the baby.

She was starting to lean over the swollen belly when, suddenly, Kerri's body shot up, her eyes wide open as she gasped. Her body moved as she heaved in breath after breath of air.

"Kerri!" Hank said, dropping the clamp he was holding and taking her hand, feeling her pulse in her wrist. "You're alive!"

"Kid! What the hell were you playing at?!" Logan growled.

Kerri continued to gulp air as though she'd just been pulled from a pool where she'd been drowning. "Helenia?" She asked, looking from side to side. "Helenia?" She asked, again, her expression becoming confused, and her hand touched her head, shaking it a little like you'd shake someone's shoulder. "Helenia, where are you?"

"Of course," Xavier said quietly. "Helenia died." They looked up to him in question. "When Dr. Randalf implanted Helenia, he created another body as well, but contained within Kerri's powers. When Helenia died, her body died as well, but when the false body died, Kerri's powers didn't have any reason to keep a dead body around, so she changed back to herself, who hadn't died. And she woke up as her body started all of it's processes again."

They looked at each other, not sure if that made as much sense as he thought it did, but nodded, as none of them had any theories.

Kerri looked over at Kurt, trying to get up, her body not quite cooperating with her, ending up holding onto the edge of his bed. "Kurt," her hand ran down his face, leaving a flaky trail of dried blood. She looked up at the monitors. "She did it, she saved you," she whispered, laying her head on the bed next to his arm, inexplicably exhausted. Her hand reached down to her stomach. "She did it, you'll have your daddy... We'll be together..."

---

Kurt was unconscious for two days, waking up on the third, with Kerri never leaving his side except to use the bathroom, but finally, he was released.

Kerri had Kurt's arm around her shoulder, waddling slightly and supporting him as they walked to his room. It wasn't that he was incapable of walking, just that it still hurt to move those muscles too much, and she worried about his stitches.

"Ach, liebling... I feel terrible; you are pregnant, I should be carrying you around, not zhe ozher vay around..." Kurt told her.

"Don't you dare, Kurt," she told him. "I don't want those stitches popping. And I'm fine. I didn't realize that being pregnant meant everyone tried to do everything for you and treat you like a child. I lived in an alley and defended myself for about a year, for crying out loud, not to mention all the training with Logan; I can take care of myself!"

They got to his room, and Kerri helped him to the bed, sitting him down on it before turning and shutting the door. When she turned back around, his shirt had moved to be in a pile at the side of the bed and his image inducer was off. Her cheeks heated a little and she bit her lip, trying not to let her mind run too wild.

He motioned for her to come closer, and she did, keeping her eyes on his. He laid down, and she moved to tuck him in. "Kerri," he said, stopping her hands with his. "Vill you lay here vizh me for a vhile?" He asked.

She took a breath, wanting to run her hands over his chest, and looked away, letting it out. "Sure," she told him. She went around to the other side of the bed and climbed next to him. She laid down and he made sure they were on the same level of bedding, so there wasn't any blankets between them.

He smiled and reached forward, his hand running down her cheek. She smiled as she looked into his eyes, feeling relaxed.

They laid like that for a few minutes, and Kurt wrapped his arms around her, pulling her tight against him and running his hand down her expanding stomach. He held her close, and after a few minutes, Kerri realized that he had fallen asleep. She cuddled against him, running her fingers across his fur, taking in the feel of it. It wasn't too long after that she fell asleep as well.

Kurt woke up, wrapped around Kerri. He frowned and pulled her closer. He hadn't meant to fall asleep, he'd wanted to hold her close for a little longer.

He shook his head slightly and nuzzled into her neck. Kerri moved, a moan that was supposed to be a giggle slipping from her mouth.

Kurt rolled her over a little and kissed her, waking her up slowly as his tongue ran across hers.

Kerri felt the warm lips pull away from her, feeling the want for them back. She was panting a little, and slowly opened her eyes, only to see Kurt's yellow eyes close, his face next to hers. "Oh... Good morning, Kurt," she mumbled.

Kurt smiled, leaning close and kissing her again, his hands holding her close against him. She felt his hand slip under her shirt, moving over her stomach again. "Good morning, bozh of you," he said against her lips with a smile.

---

After spending the day together, Kerri helped Kurt into his room again, supporting his aching side. He looked up at her from the bed with puppy dog eyes. "Join me for a vhile?" He asked.

Kerri smiled and climbed onto the bed with him. "Ok, but just for a while," she told him.

Kurt stroked her hair with one hand as his other pressed against her stomach. Suddenly, she took his hand and pressed against another spot. "Vhat are you doing, liebling?" He asked, but she raised her hand to him and shifted his hand a little.

"There, can you feel that?" She asked.

Kurt's eyes widened as he felt pressure under his hand. "Ja..."

"The baby's kicking," she told him, smiling at the look of wonder on his face.

He shifted and moved lower, watching the skin stretch where the movement was. It stopped and he pressed his face against the spot, speaking softly in German and listening to her stomach. "Liebling," he started as he stretched back out. "Ve should get married before zhe baby comes, so it's not born out of vedlock..."

Kerri blinked at him. "Kurt, it's not that strange these days, it's not like that's going to be one of the things we'll have to worry about it being teased about..."

"Nein, I know, aber... It is still zhe vay of zhe curch..." he said, looking at her belly.

She bit her lip as she watched his face. "Kurt... I don't really want people thinking that the baby is the only reason we got married..."

"Kerri, if anyvone looked at us, zhey vould be able to tell ve're in love," he told her.

"I know, but it's what they say to the baby that I'm worried about. Hearing that kind of thing is hard, I think. My friend was told that when we were little, and... She always wondered if her parents really loved each other or just stayed together for her, if they really loved her or if they hated her for making them stay together..."

"Ja, ok," he agreed. "But, vhat do ve do, zhen?"

Kerri was silent for a moment, her hand next to Kurt's on her belly. "We could get a justice of the peace to marry us, then have the ceremony after the baby's born," she suggested.

Kurt looked up at her. "Get married tvice?"

"Well, if you don't want to," she trailed off, trying to think of another idea.

"Schatz, I vould love to marry you tvice. More zhan zhat if zhey vould let me," he told her, cupping her cheek and kissing her. Kerri blushed a little but kissed him back until they both laid back, slowly falling asleep.

Kurt woke up, his arms wrapped around Kerri's swollen middle, his tail around her thigh. As he shifted, nuzzling deeper into the curve of her neck, he kissed her shoulder. He really didn't want to fall asleep again, he wanted to spend as much time with her as possible, making up for the missed time.

He rolled away a little, making sure the alarm was off before curling around Kerri again. She hummed and turned, her hair falling over her cheek.

Kurt smiled, brushing the hair out of the way and kissed her neck, down to her shoulder, and up her neck to her ear. "Kerri," he whispered. She moaned and shifted a little. He smiled again, his hand pulling her hand closer, his fingers running over the stones in the ring.

It wasn't the most amazing ring that had been at the store, or the most expensive, only being about two hundred for the set, but he thought it looked amazing on her hand, it was more to her tastes than the other things, and, most importantly, she loved it.

He nuzzled against her neck again, his hand sliding from her hand to her stomach, smoothing across it and back, his hand tightening to pull her tighter against him.

"Kerri," he whispered again, making her moan and turn more to him.

"Are you calling me?" She asked.

"Yes, liebling," he told her softly.

"You're so quiet," she mumbled, still mostly asleep.

"Sorry, liebling," he told her, helping her roll over to face him. She cuddled into his chest, and he smiled again, tilting her chin to kiss her.

---

Finally, after a couple more days, Kurt's stitches came out, and they celebrated by going out to dinner.

They got back a little late, and as they went up the stairs to go to sleep, Kurt walked towards Kerri's room with her. "Liebling, vhy don't you get some clothes and come stay vizh me again?" He asked.

Kerri smiled, almost laughing. "I don't know, Kurt, shouldn't we, you know... Sleep apart since we're not married?"

Kurt stopped walking and turned her so she was looking at him. "Liebling, I never vant to be apart from you again; I'm never going to take my eyes off of you two. And it vould be easier to do zhat if you stayed in my room vizh me," he told her.

"But, Kurt-"

Kurt put his thumb on her lips, stopping her speech so he could place a gentle kiss on her lips. "Bitte, liebling? Come stay vizh me, forever?"

Kerri blushed as she looked up into his eyes. "Ok," she answered.

Kurt then proceeded to refuse to let Kerri sleep anywhere but his arms, every night.

---

Kerri was walking with Kurt when he got the call for a mission.

She stubbornly refused to get out of the jet when they tried to leave, glaring at anyone who tried to tell her to go.

"Just, leave her," Scott finally said. "We have to go! But you have to stay in the jet," he ordered her.

Kurt held her hand. "Liebling, it vill be too dangerous for you to fight..."

"I won't fight," she told him. "I just have to make sure you're ok, I'm due to have your baby next month," she chided. "Besides, I feel like I'm so big I'm going to explode; it would take something pretty big to get me out of this jet."

The jet landed and they saw the thing that Dr. Randalf had created to wreak havoc. It was about five stories tall, compared to the building it was by, it was very deformed, but a human shape could be made out, and they saw Dr. Randalf, standing on one of the buildings, giving the thing orders.

The team left the jet, leaving Kerri to sit and watch out the window. They were having trouble, she could tell, but they had it -mostly- under control.

She watched as Wolverine and Cyclops attacked it while Jean held it so it couldn't get away into more crowded areas, but the thing seemed to have infinite life.

Kerri shook her head and looked around for Kurt, spotting him moving towards where Dr. Randalf had moved to, a few blocks from the jet and her. He hid for a moment, then teleported up to him. Kerri bit her lip, trying to see what was happening.

Suddenly, she could tell that Dr. Randalf had the upper hand, holding on to Kurt, and for some reason, he wasn't teleporting away.

She looked around frantically, seeing nothing to help the situation. She watched the group, but as Beast leaped into action, attacking the giant monster, no one was able to get away to help Kurt. She climbed from her seat, looking around again frantically before remembering that the handset in the cockpit linked to the team's radios.

She rushed to the front, turning it on and sitting in the chair, keeping her eyes out the window on Kurt. "Hey, guys, um- someone needs to go help Kurt."

"Sorry, Kerri, we're a little busy here," Cyclops answered.

"Don't worry," Jean answered. "He's done this kind of thing before, he'll be ok."

"No, you don't understand, he needs-"

"Kerri, get off the radio and stop worrying," Cyclops interrupted her to order.

She gave up talking to them and instead spoke to Kurt. "Kurt, get out of there, come on, Kurt, get out."

"Leave him alone, Kerri!" Cyclops ordered.

Kerri felt the nervousness and panic start washing through her. Something was obviously wrong as Dr. Randalf seemed to threaten to throw him over the edge of the building. "Teleport, Kurt, why don't you teleport?" She asked, her emotions starting to bleed into her voice. "Kurt!" She almost yelled out, but forgetting to hit the button on the radio. She turned the chair and stood, hurrying out of the jet and toward the building, waddling as fast as she could.

A group of people fled from the building in front of her and she shifted, her tail pushing against the band of her pants and her wings ripping the back of her dress open.

She flapped, knowing she'd get there faster by air. "Excuse me, excuse me, pregnant woman coming through," she shouted, watching the crowd part for her as she hovered through them.

Kurt looked into Dr. Randalf's face. He'd gotten there in good time, now he only had to stop the man in front of him from controlling the monster attacking the rest of the group. He teleported to his side to take hold of him, but Dr. Randalf simply told him to let go, and his arms loosened.

Kurt stared at his arms in confusion and took hold of the man again.

"Let me go," he ordered, and Kurt's arms again slipped from his body.

"Vhat zhe-" He looked down at his arms, and Dr. Randalf grabbed ahold of the front of his suit.

"Not as easy as you thought, huh?" He asked. "By the way, I hope you enjoy being up here, since you can't teleport."

"I can teleport," Kurt told him.

"No, you can't. You can't teleport," Dr. Randalf told him again. He repeated it a few more times, and Kurt gave him a strange look.

"Ah, but you see, I can," he said, teleporting.

But he didn't move.

"I told you," Dr. Randalf said. "You can't teleport."

Shock and worry filled Kurt's face as he now fought against the man's grip on him, and he suddenly felt afraid of heights as he was leaned over toward the edge of the building.

"Not so fun when you can't stop from falling, is it?" Dr. Randalf asked him. Kurt's tail and hands wrapped around the older man's, trying to steady himself, though the edge of the building was at least a foot and a half away, but Dr. Randalf pulled a pistol from his side pocket and aimed it at him, pushing it against the underside of his chin. "I don't think so. Let go."

Fear was etched into his face as Kurt let his hands and tail fall from the supporting arms, one holding the front of his suit, the other pressing the gun to his chin, but still his only life lines now that he couldn't teleport.

Something wrapped around Dr. Randalf's throat, a blade slipping out to press against it. "No, you let go," Kerri said from behind him.

Dr. Randalf cocked his head the tiniest fraction, recognizing the voice. He laughed, "you won't do it. You forget; I've been in your head, I know that you've never killed anyone before."

It was true, she hadn't, and didn't really want to; she had trouble committing to killing the evil man in front of her, even though she knew he deserved it and had had first hand experience that he did. "There's always a first," Kerri bluffed to him darkly. "You wanna pop my cherry?"

"I'd say someone did that about nine months ago," Dr. Randalf quipped.

Kerri tugged a little harder at his throat, making a line of red appear. "I said let him go."

Dr. Randalf tried to say something else, but Kerri's tail tightened again, and he could feel the blade against his windpipe. "Ok, ok," he said, his hand letting go.

"Now, give him the gun," she ordered.

"Ok, like, this?" Dr. Randalf asked.

Kerri saw the instant his hold started shifting on the grip, going to shoot. Her eyes widened, her tail yanked back on Dr. Randalf's neck, forgetting about the blade and pulling him away as she leapt around between them, her wings trying to cover them both.

The shot still went off, though Dr. Randalf's head rolled across the rooftop, and Kerri saw as though in slow motion, the bullet heading straight to her chest. About five inches in front of her it ricochet off of an invisible force and changed direction.

Unfortunately, it was aimed at her temple.

Kurt caught the wing covered bundle of pregnant woman that fell into his arms. "Kerri," he called to her, looking over her body. "Kerri," he called again, his hand going to her cheek. "Liebling!"

Kerri looked up at Kurt as blood trickled down her forehead. "Kurt... Save the baby..." her lashes fluttered for a moment and as she looked up, she saw an almost transparent figure behind him, red skinned, horns from somewhere on his figure. 'The Devil,' she thought, thinking that he was there for her soul. "I love you, Kurt..." Everything went black, and she felt a familiar feeling, almost like teleporting with Kurt.

Kurt held her closer, panic washing over him as her eyes closed and her body went limp as she passed out, blood still running down her head and face. "Liebling, no!" He pulled her closer against him. "NO!" He looked around to where the rest of the group had finally defeated the monster they'd come to face.

"Mission accomplished, Kurt, how are you doing over there with Dr. Randalf?" Cyclops asked.

"Kerri has been hit, she's-" He teleported to the jet, the hold Dr. Randalf had over him slipping away when his mind had no longer been able to control his, though too late to escape the bullet. "Ve have to get back, NOW," he told them.

"How did she get hit when she wasn't supposed to leave the jet?" Cyclops demanded as he walked up into the jet.

The rest of them weren't far behind him, and they stopped in shock at the picture that awaited them. Wolverine pulled his cowl back, growling. "Jean, Hank, get to work on her, I'll get us back to the mansion. Summers, help them," he growled, going to the cockpit and starting the jet as fast as the machinery would allow.

They took off, getting to the sprawling building as fast as possible.

They pulled Kerri in on a gurney, picking her up and moving her to a bed, removing the air pump and putting a tube down to her lungs to get her air while attaching the sensors from the monitors as well.

Jean pushed the button and watched as nothing came up for a moment, but after the moment, a low pulse was readable as well as the other stats.

Hank pulled on a set of gloves, handing the box to Jean, who gloved up as well, both now with masks over their faces. "Removing the temporary bandages," he told her.

"Go ahead," Jean answered, pulling gauze and sponges out to be ready for what was underneath.

Hank pulled off the blood soaked bandages and looked at the welling pool of blood coming from her forehead between wipes. "She'll need stitches. Kurt, what did you say happened?"

Kurt stood in the area they had allowed him to be in for the moment, trying not to panic. "She, zhe gun vent off, and- it hit her-" He cut off, pacing back and forth, eyes glued to the table.

"Shot, got it. Jean, suction, while I look for the bullet," he motioned to her.

Logan put his hand on Kurt's shoulder and directed him out through the doors to the hall. "You don't need to see this," he grumbled gently.

Kurt paced, his hands running through his hair, over his face, trying not to teleport back in there and see what was happening. He leaned against the wall and slid down, his hand touching his face. He realized that his hands were covered in Kerri's blood, and put his head against his wrists instead.

"It's been too long, vhat's happening?" Kurt asked after a bit.

"Don't know, Elf, but I do know they're doing their best," Logan answered.

"Vhat... if zhey... can't..." Kurt couldn't bring himself to say it.

"Don't even think it, they'll do it," Logan growled.

It was a little longer, but Jean opened the door and stepped out, taking off her gloves. "She's stable." Kurt let out an audible sigh of relief. "She is still unconscious, but stable. We found a fragment of a bullet in her skull-" Kurt's eyes jumped up to her face. "We got it out, Hank is just finishing the stitches and last few things now..."

"Can I see her?" Kurt asked.

"Give Hank a minute to finish... But, Kurt... I have to talk to you... She's not conscious, and... There's trauma to her head..."

"Vhat are you saying?" Kurt asked, standing.

"Kurt, she's not very responsive to stimuli... She's... Her brain is swollen, and- we're not sure how much damage it's taken..."

"Vhat does zhat mean?" Kurt demanded.

"Kurt-"

"Jeannie," Logan stopped her. "They don't know if she's going to recover," Logan told him. Kurt glared at him.

"Kurt," Jean started tentatively. "We... Need to talk about what to do with the baby."

"Vhat do you mean?" Kurt demanded.

The door opened a crack and Hank poked his head out. "Kurt, you can come in, now."

Kurt pushed past them, rushing to the bed, seeing Kerri in a gown, laying under the blankets, bandages around her head, a tube in her mouth, and IVs and needles attached to her. He stopped next to her, his hand resting on hers.

"Did Jean talk to you about..." Hank trailed off.

"I started to," Jean told him.

Hank gestured to the monitor, at one of the lines that was barely moving. "Kurt, this monitors her brain waves. The lowness of the waves... It means that she is close to brain dead..."

Kurt stared at him. "But, she vill get better," he said.

"Kurt... With how low they are now, it's not likely-"

"But, not impossible," Kurt interrupted.

"No, just, highly, highly unlikely." Hank looked down at Kerri, then to her stomach. "Kurt, there are a few things to talk about."

"Like vhat?" Kurt asked.

"What to do about the baby," Hank told him. "The baby is still doing fine, as far as I can tell, but, it's also old enough that if we, if we needed to take it out-"

"Vhat do you mean, take it out?" Kurt interrupted.

"Remove the baby from Kerri's body, in a cesarean," Hank explained. "It would survive, if we did..."

Kurt looked at him in offense. "Kerri should be zhere vhen zhe baby is born, avake," he said.

"Kurt, that may not-"

"Zhere is still a monzh left until zhe baby is due, she could vake up at any time," he told them.

"That is true, Kurt," Jean agreed. "But, we just wanted to go over the options with you, just in case, so you knew them..."

Kurt folded his arms. "As long as nozhing is wrong vizh zhe baby, let it be," he told them.

"Of course," Xavier said from behind them as he entered the room.

"Professor, can you scan Kerri's mind, find her in zhere?" Kurt asked.

"Jean already tried, Kurt, I'm sorry, she's not there, but, that just means that we can't reach her right now," he comforted.

Kurt looked back to Kerri and pulled her hand into his.

---

"You are not a very smart one, are you?" A voice asked her.

Kerri opened her eyes, looking up to see the red figure she'd seen behind Kurt. The Devil.

"I asked you a question," he told her. "Did you not hear me, or are you too stupid to answer?" He asked. Kerri sat up, but didn't answer. "Why would you jump in front of a bullet, while you are pregnant?" He asked.

"To save the man I love. They, Hank and Jean, they'll be able to save the baby... They'll be fine..." Kerri said quietly, looking at the ground.

"If he loves you as much as you love him, what makes you think he will be ok?" The man asked.

Kerri bit her lip, looking at the ground.

---

Kurt ran his hand over Kerri's stomach, his head laying next to her on the bed. "Don't worry," he told the baby in German. "Your mama is very strong, she will wake up. She'll probably sit up and ask me vhy she is in bed down here, and not in our room. You will love it there," he told the baby, moving his ear to where it was, listening to it's heartbeat. "It isn't very big, but they're building housing, and we'll be able to move into it this summer, the Professor said. It'll be like having our own apartment, and we'll get to sit back while she decorates it... I'll just hold you on the couch while she goes around and says where everything goes and what color it will be..." Kurt felt the tears running down his face, wetting his cheeks and Kerri's stomach.

He looked up to Kerri's face and buried his face back into the sheets. "Vake up, vake up, liebling... bitte..."

It had been almost two weeks since they'd been out on the mission, since she'd gotten in the way, saved him from being shot, fell in to a coma...

He stroked her cheek, leaning up to kiss her, only able to kiss the side of her mouth because of the tube. "Liebling, I vould like to give you a proper kiss, like you did vhen I voke up... But you have to vake up first. Just vake up..."

---

"Do you see?" Azazel asked. "He will never be happy without you."

"That's not true... It'll just take some time... And he'll have the baby..." Kerri told him.

"You are so hard headed, is your head made of stone?" He demanded. "Look at his pain, his torment, that you caused. Not a bad person, then why did you do this?"

"I saved his life!" Kerri yelled. "They said the baby will live, and he's alive, that's all that I care about!"

"You don't care that you're in Hell and going to be tortured for all of eternity?" He asked.

"I saved them... That's what's important..." Kerri looked to the side.

He'd gone through all the memories of their lives, where she'd been horrible to Kurt, all the happy moments, everything.

"You are a tough nut to crack. I guess it is time for you to go back," he told her.

"What do you mean?" She asked in confusion.

"Well," he started. "I have been keeping you here so that your body could recuperate; if your brain had swollen much more and it was active, it would have lost oxygen and you would have been brain dead. I could not very well let that happen, not when you tried to give your life for my son, and not when the bullet hitting you in the head was my fault." Kerri stared at him in wide eyed shock. "I tried to deflect it, but it bounced in an unexpected way," he explained.

Kerri continued to stare at him in shock.

"Well, go on, it is time for you to go back, but think more carefully next time; I did this as a fovor, but do not think I will ever do it again," he told her. "And you should prepare for the next big battle ahead of you. It is very difficult to birth a Neyaphem."

"A what?" Kerri asked.

"Ah, yes, I forgot to say; Neyaphem is the word for our species, although he is only a half, it will still be hard on you," he told her, a smirk on his face. "Now, away with you," he said, and she felt like she was being thrown through time and space.

Kerri's eyes blearily opened, looking up at the ceiling. Her head turned to the side, a tube crossing her vision on one eye, to see Kurt sleeping next to her with his head on the bed. Her eyes slowly closed again as an unbearably heavy pressure of sleepiness overcame her.

Kerri's eyes opened again some time later, and her body shifted as she fought to turn to Kurt. She felt his hand on hers and smiled, as much as she could with the tube in her mouth, anyway, her other hand slowly making it's way to her still swollen stomach. The heaviness came back over her and she fell back into the abyss of blackness.

---

Kurt woke up, seeing Kerri's face turned to him. He felt immediate excitement, but told himself to calm down. He looked over her body, seeing how it was leaned toward him, her hand on her stomach. He smiled, standing in excitement and stroking her face. "Ja, liebling, zhat's it, vake up," he told her.

Hank came through the door and looked to where the couple was, making his way to them. "How are you doing today, Kurt?"

"Look," he said, gesturing to where Kerri was.

Hank looked over at her, then hurried to the monitors. "Did she move by herself?"

"Ja," Kurt told him.

"Her monitors don't look any better," Hank commented. "But she does seem to be breathing on her own, I'm going to take out her tube," she said. Kerri coughed as he pulled it out, and when it was fully out, she moaned.

Kurt grabbed her hand in excitement. "Liebling."

Hank watched her reaction. "I'm not sure, Kurt, she might not be reacting to the stimuli."

Kurt turned back to Kerri, rubbing her shoulder and calling to her. "Kerri, liebling, Kerri..."

Kerri groaned again and her eyes fluttered.

"Dr. McCoy, are you giving her anyzhing zhat might make her stay asleep?"

"No, I can't give her much of anything because of the baby- but, maybe..." He went to the bags dripping into the IV and adjusted one of them. "The pain killers, combined with the antibiotics, might cause that sort of reaction... There, it will take a few hours for the drip to equalize, then we'll see if she wakes up."

---

Kurt watched the clock, counting the minutes until Kerri would wake up.

Finally, she stirred.

"Kerri, liebling," he called to her in excitement.

Kerri opened her eyes and looked up at him. "Kurt..."

"Schatz!" He cried, followed by a rapid string of German as he stood and pulled her against him. "I'm so happy, I'm so happy, liebling, so glad to see you..."

"I'm glad to see you, too... Kurt," her hand tiredly ran over his face.

Everyone visited Kerri when they'd heard she was awake, and she greeted them tiredly.

After they left, Kurt ran his hand over her belly. "I told you," he whispered in German. "I told you not to worry because your mama is tough, and she will make it." Kerri groaned in her sleep, holding tighter to his hand.

---

When she was finally released, Kurt almost carried Kerri up the stairs and down the hall to his room.

"I'm still not allowed to sleep in my room?" She asked teasingly.

"Not a chance, liebling," he told her. He helped her settle in the bed, pulling the covers over her. "Now, you two get some more rest."

Kerri held onto him as he laid next to her.

---

Kerri and Kurt walked up to the court building in front of them, dressed nicely in preparation for their wedding.

Logan followed them into the building in his own suit, but paused when they got to a set of metal detectors.

Kerri bit her lip and walked to one of the guards. "Excuse me," she softly said.

"Yes, how can I help you, ma'am?" He asked as he turned to her.

"Well, my fiancee and I, we're going up to be married- and, our friend, he's supposed to be out wittiness, but he has some metal in his bones, old war injuries," she told him.

"Well, if it's just a few pins, he should be fine," the guard told her.

"Um, no, you see," she started, putting her hand on his. "He has a lot of metal inside of him. But he can't help it, it's not like he can take his skeleton out," she told him. "Why punish us, and him, for something someone else did to him?"

The guard looked at her for a second before snapping back to reality. "Yeah, I'll wave the wand over him, we'll see just how bad it is."

He took out the paddle like contraption and Logan shifted, grumbling, "I don't think it's gonna work, Kid."

Kerri focused, standing close to the guard, since she couldn't touch him. Finally, the guard let them go through and Kerri leaned on Kurt, panting and wiping her forehead.

"Liebling, you shouldn't use your powers too much, you're due to have a baby at zhe end of zhe veek," Kurt told her.

"It's ok, I'm fine, just a little tired," she told him.

"Surprised you got him to let me go," Logan said.

"Yeah, it was tough," she agreed.

They reached the room they were supposed to be at and knocked. They were let in, and informed that they would need two witnesses for the wedding, but one of the secretaries volunteered to come sign for them, and were led into the inner room.

A robed man walked into the room as Kerri clutched her stomach.

"Are you ok?" Kurt asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine," she told him.

The judge started talking, telling about how marriage is one of the most sacred of all unions, on and on, and Kerri couldn't help holding her stomach.

"Vhat is wrong, liebling?" Kurt whispered to her.

"Nothing, I think it's Braxton Hicks," she said.

"Don't know about that, Kid, you are due within a week," Logan told her.

"No, I'm fine," she insisted.

"Young lady, if you're in labor, you should get to the hospital," the judge told her.

"Don't worry so much, they won't even let you in until your contractions are five minutes apart," the secretary told them.

"See?" Kerri asked. "So, let's get married."

The judge started where he'd left off in his spiel, how the ring was for devotion and eternity, and-

Kerri let out a pained cry as she clutched her stomach.

"Kerri, liebling! Maybe ve should go to zhe hospital, ja?" Kurt asked.

"Kurt, you're the one who wanted to get married before the baby was born," she panted for a moment. "I'm fine, let's just finish this."

"Do- uh, do you, Kurt, take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife..." Kurt was distracted from the rest as Kerri clenched her jaw.

"Ja, I do," he answered.

"And Kerri, do you take this man-"

"Ow, shit!" She yelled as wetness flowed down her leg under her dress.

"Um, honey, I think your water just broke," the secretary commented.

"You should really get to the hospital," the judge told her nervously.

"Wait," she said. "We're almost done, just the last little bit, come on."

Kurt looked at her. "Liebling, ve should get you to zhe hospital, zhe baby is coming," he told her.

"But not yet, there's still time, I know that this is important to you," she told him, groaning as another pain went through her. "Please, finish the wedding," she asked the judge.

"O-ok," he answered. "Do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold-"

"Yes, I do. A little faster, please?" Kerri asked.

"Place the rings on each other's fingers. You may kiss the bride," he said, and Kurt kissed her quickly.

"Now, liebling, let's go, bitte?" Kurt asked.

"Are we done?" Kerri asked.

"We all just have to sign the paper and file it, now," he said, and they all rushed through signing the paper. Kerri gave another yell as she finished signing and grabbed onto the desk where it was. "You- you go, I'll file this for you," he told them.

"Zhank you very much," Kurt said, and he and Logan held Kerri upright as they hurried out of the room.

---

Kerri huffed in her practiced breathing as the three of them got to the counter.

"Ve, ah, ve are having a baby- I mean, vell, obviously," Kurt laughed nervously.

"Please page Dr. Morse," Kerri said a little more calmly as she huffed.

Logan held up her other side silently, watching the nurse as she looked over some papers, nonplussed.

"Ok, I'll need you to sign some papers, and- oh. It looks like it's Dr. Morse's day off today," the nurse told them.

"Ok, then hurry and page her, because she needs to be here when this happens," Kerri insisted.

"I'm sorry, I can't do that," the nurse said. "But I'll page the doctor on call."

Kerri's eyes darkened as she looked at the nurse. "No. I can't have my baby with just anybody, I need Dr. Morse."

"I'm sorry, ma'am, I can't," the nurse told her like she was a trouble maker.

"You don't understand. I'm not having this baby here if Dr. Morse isn't here to catch it. I will go home and whatever happens to us will be on you because you refused to pick up the phone. Call Dr. Morse, now-" Kerri was cut off as a blood curdling scream of pain left her mouth.

The nurse looked at her in shock. Plenty of women were upset to not have their doctor, and a few of them threatened to leave, but they never screamed like that; like they were being ripped apart. She reached for the phone with her eyes still on Kerri. "I'll see what I can do," she said. After a few minutes, the nurse hung up with a strange look on her face. "She said she'll be right in. That never happens," she murmured to herself.

"Thank you," Kerri sighed, being dragged away to the chairs while Kurt fussed over her and forgot about the paperwork.

A while later, Kerri growled at a man who was looking at her.

"Liebling, it's ok, don't vorry about him," Kurt stroked her arm.

Kerri's glare changed direction to him, and she saw Dr. Morse walking into the area. "Oh, thank God," she groaned and tried to stand.

---

It was still a few hours before Kerri was on the gurney, pushing, but it seemed to be an eternity.

"You're doing great, just push," Dr. Morse encouraged her.

"Come on, liebling, you can do it," Kurt told her.

Kerri pushed, and felt the pain of something too large pushing through a hole that was too small.

"We've got a head, one more push, come on," Dr. Morse said.

Kerri pushed, and pushed, and pushed.

Finally, Dr. Morse declared that there was a baby, and it was cleaned before she laid the baby of Kerri's chest.

"It's a girl, congratulations," she said.

Kurt stared at the little blue bundle, ten fingers, ten toes, a tail, and a tuff of black hair. He leaned down to take her little hand in his, and her eyes cracked open, revealing a blue-green that matched Kerri's.

And just that easily, his breath was stolen.

She was a little bundle of miracle, of perfection... His tiny bundle of miraculous perfection.

"Liebling," he trailed off, looking to where Kerri was staring at their daughter. "Liebling... Ve still have to name her..."

"I think I have the perfect name," she said, looking up at him.

---

Kerri rubbed her eyes as she rolled over in bed, feeling her heavy stomach settle against the mattress.

She sighed, not enjoying the feeling of being so pregnant so soon after having their first child. It wasn't really so bad, just that she was looking forward to fighting in the danger room and doing gymnastics again, but you weren't allowed to turn upside down when you were pregnant, which seemed silly to her, since any child she and Kurt had would probably love being upside down as much as he did.

She heard her daughter laughing outside the room and fought her way from the bed, making her way to the hall, where she saw Kurt holding their daughter in his tail and crawling along the wall. "Kurt, do you have to teach her to crawl on the walls so early, she's already tough to keep up with when she crawls on the floor," she complained, taking the baby from him and going to the living room to sit and play with her.

"Ah, liebling, ve vere just having fun, right, Helenia?" he asked, tickling the baby's tummy and making her giggle.

"Mm-hm," Kerri hummed, pulling Kurt next to her on the couch. Kurt smiled, leaning forward to kiss her. "Hey, you stop that, that's how we got into this mess in the first place."

"Vhat mess are you talking about, liebling?" He asked innocently.

"You know, where I'm pregnant before Helenia is even a year old," she told him.

"I don't zhink it's such a mess," he said, running his hand over her stomach lovingly.

Kerri leaned her head against him, smiling as she looked down at their first little miracle.

---

"Kurt, could you watch Helenia and Arden, I have to run to the store for a few things," Kerri asked as she checked how much money she had in her wallet.

"Ja, come on, you two, let's go see everyvone at zhe mansion," Kurt said, taking the two small children, Helenia crawling up to his shoulder to sit, and Arden held on his hip.

Kerri walked with them, kissing them goodbye as she continued on her way to the garage.

She went to the store, buying some lotion, cookies, just a few things, and finally, she made her way to the isle that had made her come here; the pregnancy tests.

She hoped that she wasn't pregnant again so soon, what with Helenia being almost a year and a half and Arden being about six months, but she was starting to feel sick again, and this time, there wasn't any other reason that she could think of.

'It's a little sad that I start feeling sick and my mind immediately jumps to pregnant, now,' she thought, shaking her head as she picked up the box.

When she got home, she went straight to the bathroom. Waiting was, again, hard to do as she watched the seconds tick by on her watch.

Finally, the test was done, and she looked at the instructions. "Ok, two lines is positive," she said, taking a breath and looking at the test. "Oh, come on!" She took the stick and stormed from the bathroom, down the halls to find Kurt.

She saw him in the middle of the hall, talking to Logan with Helenia on his shoulder and Arden playing at his feet, his tail around him.

"Kurt," she growled at him. "Kurt Wanger!" She yelled.

The two men looked at her walking toward them in a cloud of anger with a small stick like object in her hand, and Logan turned.

"I'll leave you two to talk," he said, walking away down the hall.

Kurt smiled at Kerri charmingly. "Hallo, liebling, back from shopping?"

"Don't you be all cute with me," she told him, brandishing the pregnancy test at him. "What are you, the freaking fountain of fertility?" She demanded.

Kurt looked at the test, recognizing it and smiling. "Ah, liebling, you seem upset... Let's not let zhe children see mama and daddy fighting. I'll talk to you vhen you have calmed down a little, ja?" He asked, teleporting the three of them away with a Bamf.

It took her a bit, but she found them in their apartment, Kurt having settled the two babies down for a nap.

"Zhere you are, liebling, how are you feeling?" He asked, walking closer to her, a grin on his face.

"You know, there is this thing called birth control, it stops this from happening," she told him, waving the stick in his face.

"But, liebling, birth control is an afront to God, it's like telling him zhat you don't care vhat he says, you are going against his plan," Kurt told her. Kerri sighed, shaking her head, and Kurt came to her, kissing her and smiling as he ran his hand over her slightly pudgy stomach.

"You want to keep me pregnant all the time, don't you?" She asked, looking up to him.

"Nein, it's not on purpose, liebling, but... it is really sexy to zhink about you having my child..." He couldn't stop smiling.

"Really? Even though this is the third one?" She asked.

"Ja," he told her. "Every time. You know, ve have a couple of hours vhile zhey sleep, maybe ve could..." he trailed off suggestivly.

Kerri looked up at him, unimpressed. "Well, I guess three isn't much different from two... But, I'm done after this," she said. "Whether that means birth control or no more sex."

"Liebling," Kurt said plaintively. "Liebling, nein..."

"We'll talk about it later," she said teasingly, pulling him toward the bedroom. "I need a nap, too."

Kurt smiled, his hand firmly attached to Kerri's stomach as she slept. He nuzzled into her neck, happy to be with her, even if she wasn't as pleased as he was at the rate their family was growing, like he'd told her, it wasn't like he'd done it on purpose, they were just happy miracles. His hand tightened a little over the newest miracle, and he sighed in contentment against her neck.

Kerri groaned, then sighed softly, calling out, "Kurt..."

"Ja, liebling," he whispered. "I'm here. I love you," he told her.

She sighed, "I love you, too, Kurt..."

---

[AN: I hope you liked it!]