Pretty sure it goes without saying that I'm an awful host! Anyways, lately I've been getting these requests for more crossover stories so that's our topic. It'll be revolving on one of my other favorite shows.

Fanfiction Trauma

Chapter 36: The Walking Criminal Dead

"Huh," Will blinked in confusion. "Does anyone else feel like it's been months since we read the last story?"

"What?" Garcia replied in confusion. "I think you've lost it Willy. It's been like five minutes. We were just reading that cringe gender bender story. Remember?"

The detective paused briefly to think. "Oh yeah!" He shrugged. "Was a bit lost for a moment there."

"I think the stories are getting to you Will." Blake added in concern. "Perhaps you should sit down for a bit. We're about to spin the bottle."

"Yeah, reckon that'd be a good idea."

"This is so repetitive." Morgan grumbled with crossed arms, watching as Emily went for the bottle.

"Put a sock in it. I don't like it anymore than you do." She replied, picking up the bottle and setting it on the middle.

Seaver sighed. "Even so, you can't help but agree with Derek on this one."

"It's his fault anyway," JJ growled, still shooting death glances at Morgan. "He should have no right to complain when he dragged us all here."

"I told you already. Garcia dragged me here."

"Reid dragged me here!" The tech replied in defense.

At this the genius leapt from his spot. "Hey no fair! It was you who initially made a party over this! I only wanted my computer fixed!"

"You know this wouldn't have happened if we had just accepted—"

"Shut it Will!" The group cut off.

"Everyone calm down." Hotch ordered, having lost his patience with their bickering. "Emily will spin the bottle as the rules state. Then, JJ, you and Morgan will apologize to one another and bury the hatchet."

JJ look flabbergasted and wanted to protest but one glance at Hotch's serious expression had her shoulders dropping in defeat. "Fine."

With that he nodded for Emily to proceed.

"Alright, here goes nothing." She murmured and spun the bottle.

Rossi sighed as he'd been picked. "Oh goody." He lifted himself upwards. "I suppose it can't be help. I'll try my luck."

Hotch turned to JJ. "You may begin now."

JJ crossed her arms and pouted defiantly. "But Hotch, why should I make the first move? He's the one who brought me here. Therefore he should apologize."

Morgan frowned in response and shot an accusing finger at her. "I'm not the one who wanted to assault someone over ten minutes ago!"

"Oh? Well I wouldn't have done so if you'd never brought me here!"

A vein popped onto Hotch's forehead while the rest shook their head.

"Well excuse me for thinking that you'd want to know if someone was out there making creepy stories about you."

"I would've preferred to stay ignorant. Funny how hindsight works."

"Enough!" Hotch cut in. "Do you two realize how you're behaving? Now I don't care who does it first but one of you is apologizing to the other. Now."

"Found one!" Rossi called out.

The Unit Chief lifted his hand, halting the others."No. We are not reading anything until these two make up."

"Don't apologize!" Emily cried out, her eyes narrowing darkly while her gaze shifted from JJ to Morgan. She approached them slowly as if she were possessed- frankly scaring the two and the others present. "Hate is good. Hate each other. Hate each other. Hate each other!"

"Whoa, Emily, you okay?" Seaver asked before snapping her fingers in Emily's face. "Hey, you there?"

This seemed to wake her from her daze. "Oh... wow, uh, sorry. I sort of blacked out there. I think the idea of not reading anymore sort of brought out... dark Emily?"

Hotch placed a protective hand on her shoulder before sending a scolding glance at the rebellious duo. "Do you see what your actions are causing? At times like these we must keep our heads together and be a team."

JJ sighed sadly. "You're right, you're right." Turning to face Morgan she spoke. "I'm sorry for attempting to physically assault you Derek."

He shook his head. "No, it's my own fault. I'm sorry. I guess I should have thought twice before letting you in on all this."

JJ opened her arms slightly. "Friends?"

He nodded. Taking her initiative he pulled her in for a small hug. "Friends."

"Awwww!" Everyone, but Hotch (who was nodding approvingly) cooed.

"Beautiful." Blake applauded. "Just beautiful."

The others soon joined in and applauded. The session lasted ten seconds before they began making their way to their seats.

End of the World

By HotchVibes

"Hopefully this only admiration and not the type of fan I had." Will exclaimed while looking at Hotch.

Hotch nodded. "We're in agreement. Also, with a bit of luck, it has no effect on who the protagonist will be."

"Hmm... I don't recall being the main character when I had that fan-tard. Maybe you won't either. In any case I'll pray for you."

"Thank you."

Summary: I've decided on mixing my two favorite shows, Criminal Minds and The Walking Dead!

Rossi paused and wheeled around. "I'm not quite familiar with the TV series you children watch. Care to enlighten me?"

"It's a great show!" Garcia happily chimed in before her smile slowly faded. "Although, I suppose I'll hate it as soon as this author butchers it."

"It's about zombies." Morgan added. "It's actually a pretty nice show."

"Didn't know you liked zombie topics," Seaver said with amusement. "Thought it wasn't your thing?"

"It isn't, not really. But Reid and Garcia got me into the show one night. The rest is history."

When Will wakes up from his coma his world is suddenly turned upside down when he finds the world has gone to hell. He's left with no answer as to why people are feeding on other people. He sets out to find his family first and foremost. It won't be an easy task for the detective.

Will groaned. "Boy, I'm not really excited about being the main character."

"It doesn't quite look like a bashing story though," Blake pointed out. "Otherwise you would've been attacked right from the summary. In fact, since you're the protagonist it will most likely appeal to you."

"Here's hoping!"

Will shot upwards abruptly. All he could see was white. White chairs, sheets, walls, curtains. His head throbbed and he lifted his arm up only to notice a cable attached to it. Wait... was this a hospital?

And then it hit him.

The flashes came so fast in his head. He had been in an accident earlier while attempting to stop a car chase with his partner.

"So far it's the same plot." Garcia exclaimed, not looking impressed.

"At least it'll have one." Blake added. "Ripped off but it's as good as plot gets with fanfiction stories."

"We've seen more plot in those few sentences than we have since being here." JJ joked.

Attempting to call the nurses turned out to be in vain. There was no response. Stumbling in the process he managed to make it off the bed. Once outside he was left even more surprised. The hallway was thrashed, completely thrashed. Beds, chairs, vases were all scattered on the ground. And was that... blood? What happened here?

The entire building seemed so empty you could probably hear a pin drop. Phone lines were also not working. Something was wrong, so very wrong. He left the reception desk and was about to head back in the direction he came from, until, something caught his eye.

Will walked to the door and peered through the window. His entire body froze, like he was in Alaska.

Lying sprawled across the floor was the remains of what used to be a person. Now being a detective he wasn't foreign to seeing a dead person but this was something else. It was something like he'd never seen before. The body was completely torn to shreds, as if a lion had devoured it. Which was ludicrous to consider. This is a hospital! There was no way some animal came and ate someone in a damn hospital!

"It's still the same storyline as the way the Walking Dead started with." Garcia grumbled.

"That's good news," Morgan exclaimed. "If it follows the same path as the Walking Dead then it'll certainly be an enjoyable story."

"I'm not holding my breath." Seaver chimed in from her seat. "It's only a matter of time before the story diverges from the original plot. Then, it'll go onto the OOC, character bashing, awful romance norm that we've been cursed with enduring all day."

Deciding that he had enough he bolted out the hospital. Since the elevators weren't working he was forced to take the stair. There was an awful stench as he walked down a flight and once he made it outside the stench hit him tenfold.

Scattered around the floor were hundreds of corpses covered up. What the hell was this? Was there an attack of some sort? Flashes of his family popped into his mind and he sprinted towards his home.

The streets were just as torn as the hospital. Cars were left scattered and abandoned everywhere he looked; blood was everywhere and the houses he past looked empty. It was pretty much a ghost town.

After what seemed like half an hour he finally came across a man standing in the road. It was odd. He was literally just standing there.

"Hey! Hey you!"

"Well it's clearly a zombie." Reid said.

"But my character doesn't know that. You never use the Z-word in these kinds of scenarios. And to be honest, would anyone really stop and say 'hey look a zombie' if they were in this type of situation?"

"Oh, right."

The person turned around and growled viciously, baring his teeth at him. Wait a minute that face looked familiar. Too familiar.

Kevin yawned. "That's me isn't it?"

"Kevin!?"

"Told you."

"Like we hadn't already figured it out!" Morgan joked earning some laughs.

"Will get back!" A familiar voice shouted.

Will went on survival mode and just jumped as far away from... what was apparently Kevin?

Just then Derek appeared and bashed Kevin upside the head with a metal bat.

"And it begins." Seaver stated.

He proceeded on bashing his head further in afterwards as if ensuring he stayed on the ground. Derek couldn't help but smirk. "Can't say I never wanted to do that."

"Fuck sake, you were right Ashley." Emily groaned.

"Told you it happened eventually. It was only a matter of time."

Garcia sighed. "I think I somehow jinxed this."

"What the hell is going on here!?" Will shouted. "Not that I really cared but why did you just kill Kevin?"

"Couldn't you see? He was a damn zombie! Have you been sleeping under a rock all this time?"

"Guess this author doesn't follow your theory on zombies." Rossi murmured before continuing.

"I've been in a coma for the good part of this crap so excuse me for not knowing what's going on!"

Derek stopped to think before nodding. "Oh right, forgot about that."

Emily raised a brow. "Good God, with that type of nonchalance you'd think it was simply a case of forgetting to take the bins out."

Will chuckled. "Some friend you are Derek."

"Where the hell are JJ and Henry!? Are they safe?"

"I don't know."

He gripped his shirt roughly. "The hell you mean you don't know!?"

Derek pushed him away. "I mean I don't know! I just got into town. You're the husband aren't you? It's your job to know where they're at! And how about saying a thank you to me? I just saved your life!"

"Your character is quite the charmer isn't he?" Blake remarked sarcastically.

Morgan shrugged. "My character is always portrayed as being a prick in these stories."

"I don't have time for this. Give me your phone so I can call her."

"If I had a working phone I wouldn't be wandering around by myself."

"Fuck off, why do you have to be sarcastic about everything?"

Derek sighed. "Look I'm sorry alright? This hasn't been easy for me. Let's go and find your family."

"I don't even know where to look. I- I need your help. Please."

"Of course I'll help you. We're friends."

"That's kind of sweet." Rossi muttered.

"Thanks. Really man. You got any idea what to do?"

"From what I last heard the people here had evacuated up north. So we need to get to the next town. Problem is that the roads are all blocked and the woods are crawling with zombies. Not to mention the fact that it'll be dark soon."

"So what now?"

"Our best bet is to head back to the BAU base and get the jet."

"And it's gone down the ridiculous path," JJ pointed out dryly. "Surprise surprise."

"You'd think someone would've jetted off on that thing by that point. No pun intended." Rossi exclaimed.

Garcia rolled her eyes. "Exactly. A jet, really? What are the odds that there's a perfectly stable jet ready and willing for takeoff during a zombie apocalypse? And don't answer that Reid."

The genius lowered himself back to his seat.

"Good idea! Let's go."

Derek placed a hand to his chest to halt him. "Not so fast. You can't go like that. There's a big chance we'll be running into more zombies on the way. You need a weapon or you'll be a sitting duck." With that said he pulled out a pocket knife. "Here, it's all I got. Aim for the head and for God's sake don't let them bite you."

"Why can't you be bitten by them?" Hotch randomly asked. "I'm assuming it's because that's how the infection spreads."

Garcia nodded. "You're correct boss man! You can't make contact with the infected. Contact with them will contaminate you and you'll turn into a zombie. The time it takes to transform varies from fandom to fandom though. Usually it takes a couple of

Will gulped and nodded. "Got it."

As they eventually made the long road to the BAU Will realized just how right Derek had been. There were zombies crawling everywhere. And it was a good thing Derek was such an expert with this stuff. They managed to sneak past a horde and took a more secluded road to the BAU.

"So am I a pilot?" Morgan asked.

"Looks like it for now," Hotch answered. "Although with the unpredictability of these stories you could be an alien as well. Therefore we can't say for sure."

"Hmm, yeah good point."

"How are you even going to drive the thing?" Kevin wondered aloud. "It's not a car after all. Now that I think about it I think you really will be an alien."

"We made it." Will whispered happily. He'd taken out about four zombies and it seemed like each time he kept dancing with death. He was more than relieved to see the BAU building he'd resented prior to this day. "Let's get on that jet. Hopefully there's some weapons we can find beforehand."

Thankfully Morgan still had his keycard and used it to get inside. "This way, come on."

*!BANG!*

"Rossi, I know these things are boring and you want to add some flavor but, did you have to yell that?" JJ grumbled while rubbing her ear. "At this rate you'll wake the boys up."

"Yeah what the heck?" Seaver added.

"My mistake," He apologized sheepishly. "Blame the author in me who sees exclamation points and well, I just go into author mode."

The sound of a bullet piercing the air had them dropping to the nearest cover, which was behind a desk.

"The fuck was that Derek?"

"This is my place! Get out!" A voice shouted.

"Hold up... I know that voice." Derek muttered before turning to Will. "Stay down and let me handle this."

Will only nodded. Better Derek to get shot than him.

Morgan laughed. "Some friend you are Will."

"Don't shoot!" Derek yelled.

"Derek is that you?"

"Yes. Now I'm coming out so don't shoot." He waited a few moments before getting on his feet. And he came face to face with the familiar woman. "Ashley."

"I'm getting bitten or possibly dying really soon."

"Oh my God... it's really you," She didn't finish as the tears fell and she ran to embrace him. "I didn't think I'd ever see you again."

"I feel the same way," He said, hugging her back. "I'm glad you made it."

Will coughed awkwardly, getting their attention. "I'm still here. Am I chop liver?"

"Will?" Ashley muttered in shock. "You're here too?" Like with Derek she quickly went to hug him. "Holy crap you have no idea how relieved I am. What happened? I thought you were dead. That's what Hotch told us all."

"What!? No! I was in a coma." Will explained angrily.

She frowned in confusion. "That's not the story he told us before leaving with your wife and son."

"Hey Hotch that means you're playing Shane." Garcia pointed out.

Will grabbed onto her shoulders desperately. "Are you telling me they're alive?" His hold tightened and anger burned inside him. "And Hotch has taken them away from me!?"

"Ow... you're hurting me." She muttered.

Instantly his grip loosened. "I'm so sorry Ashley. It's just... shit, my world has changed in the blink of an eye. And I... I don't know what's happening. I trusted Hotch. My own wife left me in some hospital." He ran a frustrated hand through his hair. "Argh! I don't know what to do! I want to find them. I want to find out the full story." He eyed the two with pleading eyes. "But I don't know this world. And I can't do this alone. I know the severity of what I'm about ask but, please... please! Will you help me?"

Derek placed his hand over his shoulder. "You know you already have my help."

Ashley eyed her friend -whom she was told was dead- with sympathetic eyes. The poor man. He had literally just woken up to find out his family was gone and the world had zombies running amok. "Okay," This was a life altering decisions where anything could happen but, he was her friend. Her friend needed her. "You can count on me."

His face gleamed with relief and he pulled both of them into an embrace, almost tearing. "Thank you! Thank you so much."

Meanwhile the real Will placed an arm around Seaver and Morgan. "Damn, you know it's good to know I can count on you two should a zombie apocalypse come about."

JJ rolled her eyes while shaking her head. Her husband took these stories way too seriously.

"Ashley, is the jet still here?" Derek asked.

"Yeah, everyone just up and abandoned the place. I came and took over. It's a bit of a safehouse for me."

Will lowered his eyes. "I'm sorry. I'm making you leave a place you've come to find as secure and safe."

"Hey don't worry." She smiled. "Until we met I was practically living just to live, no purpose whatsoever. And now I have one. I want to help you."

Seaver raised a brow. "We're getting shipped aren't we? God I wish wee had more control over that."

This seemed to trigger Kevin into deep thought.

"Thanks. Really, both of you. I'll never forget this. I'll do everything I can to adjust to this new world and protect you two. And then, after what's done is done we'll come back here and make this our home."

"Sounds like a plan to me." Derek said. "Now off to that jet. We need to fly north and cut off Hotch's group before they proceed any further."

"I've got a stash of weapons hidden down there and they're just dying to be put into use."

"Good pun." Reid stated with a chuckle.

"When did you learn to fly?" Will said while they went towards the jet. "I wasn't out that long was I?"

Derek stiffened suddenly. "W-Well that's a secret! And if I tell you I'd have to kill you." He finished nervously.

"I think you're a robot." Emily said. "A robot would know how to fly a plane."

"Or he could be an android." Garcia added. "Especially since he appears to have feelings and all. What do you think Kevin?"

But Kevin remained transfixed on whatever it was he was thinking about.

A/N - I'm keeping Derek's dirty little secret a secret for now! That's for you to figure out. Next we'll be seeing more of the others and more zombie skull bashing too.

Rossi sighed and stood from the chair. "It wasn't too bad. Although it wasn't exactly up to standards with what we settled on searching for."

"Eureka!" Kevin shouted abruptly with clasped hands while scaring the others.

Garcia frowned. "What's the deal Kevin? You almost gave me a heart attack."

"Sorry, sorry! It's just something Ashley said earlier, you know, the bit about being shipped?"

"What about it?" Blake prompted.

"Well I just remembered that you can see who's getting paired with who. You can also choose specific characters and genres." He laughed, not noticing the grim tension filling the room. "Hahah man oh man can you believe I just remembered that detail? Am I right? Am I right? Erm... guys?" Dread bubbled inside Kevin and he gulped as he finally noticed the death look everyone was giving him. "Well shit."

Author's Notes

Yes, yes, I suck. Awful hiatus! That's why I tried to make this longer than what is normally used. :(