Chapter 36

So not everybody enjoyed the last chapter and in a way I'm quite flattered that it was provocative enough to gain new reviewers. If Harry's deed seemed 'out of character' then I think that is a good indication of the torment she is going through right now. But as I said at the start of the last chapter, it's just a story so please don't take the character's views (or mine for that matter) to heart.

..."I can't blame him for that. He was right. How else would you describe a woman who aborts her baby to spite her husband when she's sixteen weeks pregnant?"

He'd read the articles in the newspapers; seen the protesters on T.V, was aware of the debate as a whole but as a man, hadn't felt the impact in any part of his life – until now.

He knew sixteen weeks was a good way into a pregnancy, far enough to make him feel uncomfortable for Harry who had moved out of his arms to get unsteadily to her feet.

She appeared to have regained a little of her composure now although her hand trembled as she ran her fingers through her wet hair and he could see all the fear of an ensnared animal in her eyes.

"I would describe her as desperate," he answered her solemnly.

Harry didn't reply, her eyes wide, looking down at where he sat crouched on the chequered floor of the bathroom.

"And hurting."

He watched as she gnawed at the skin on the side of her thumb.

"And feeling very alone."

Tears ran freely down her cheeks.

"And I ain't gonna sit here in judgement 'cause I've never been in that situation and never will. But I know you must have been in a pretty dark place at the time and that seemed like the only way you had of getting yourself out of it."

He was skating on thin ice, commenting before he'd even had a chance to get his head around it. He sounded too diplomatic, like he was simply trying to spare her feelings when in truth, he honestly didn't know what he was dealing with.

"You're shocked, aren't you? And you're disgusted too. I can see it in your eyes." Harry wiped a finger under each eye, looking down at the floor. "God, why did I tell you?" she cried out.

"I ain't either of those things, Harry." Then he frowned. "No, wait, that's a lie 'cause I have to tell ya, when I think of your ex, I get this cold feelin' that twists in my gut, makes me wanna rip open his throat and shit down his gullet. You think that's brought on by the shock and disgust, maybe?"

His expression didn't change, like he was asking a serious question.

Harry bit hard at her lips again and followed him with her eyes as he got up and moved to turn off the shower.

The silence, as they say, was deafening.

Now he didn't have her in his arms any longer, all the tenderness he had felt had evaporated, to be replaced by a seething anger.

"You prosecuted?" he checked.

She shook her head.

"Why the hell not? He busts you up and walks away scot free, hand in hand with your skanky bitch girlfriend? How the f%*k does that work, huh?"

"It was just better for all concerned. I didn't want anyone to know I'd had the abortion and if it had come out that he'd hit me, it could have ended his professional career."

Dempsey swung away from the bath to face her, a furiously dark cast in his eyes. "He didn't hit you, he beat you. You understand the difference, right? Not that a distinction is strictly necessary but the guy was a f%*king' wife-beater, sweetheart," he shouted.

He turned on his heel, hands raised in a pacifying gesture and took a couple of paces away. "Okay, okay, I know. You don't need this right now. I'm sorry, okay?" He bent forwards to rest the palms of his hands on his thighs as he tried to compose himself. "He make a habit of it?" he asked gruffly.

"Of course not. He'd never laid a finger on me before."

"Just that I feel like I have to ask, ya know, 'cause usually any guy who can do that is no stranger to violence. You know that same as me, you've seen it, you've been around it."

"It was the first and only time," Harry said defensively. "I thought you knew me well enough to realise that."

"Didn't know you four years ago, babe."

Harry clutched the towel to her breast with one hand and tried to tug the hemline lower. It barely covered the tops of her thighs and she seemed extremely conscious of this fact now.

"Everyone is capable of anything given extreme provocation, Dempsey. I've seen that often enough too."

He straightened up, shaking his head with an incredulous laugh. "Sounds like you're defending him! He beat you senseless but that don't matter, it's okay 'cause you got a termination and that makes him inculpable."

"No!" she cut in sharply. "None of it was 'okay' but he would never have hit me if I'd kept the baby, I'm sure of that."

"Listen to yourself, will ya? The whys and wherefores don't matter one iota. He used his fists on you, end of story," he shot angrily, the side of his hand slicing through the air in a gesture of finality. But then his head jerked up and he continued. "No. Hold on, wait a minute here, let's not forget who set the wheels in motion. If he and this best friend of yours hadn't of been gettin' it on behind your back then maybe you'd of been livin' happy ever after!"

He couldn't stop himself. He could hear the aggression in his voice and see the effect it was having on her yet he had this stupid need to get his emotions out there. If he didn't, he had a feeling he would loose it big-time, right there in front of her and that, she definitely didn't need.

Harry was staring at him in disbelief and struggling to hold herself together.

"I'm aware of that. Of all of it. Really. You didn't have to spell it out quite so succinctly."

The scowl she wore on her face held rigid for only a few moments more before the warm, sour tears spilled over her cheeks to melt it away.

"So if you get it, why can't you cut yourself some slack? Why're you takin' that bastard's side?"

"You don't understand."

"You got that much right."

"You think you know it all, don't you, Dempsey?" she said bitterly as the silent tears fell.

"I know I would never have cheated on you."

There was a ringing quiet whilst they both absorbed what he had said.

Then Harry sniffed and wiped at her eyes. "They both cheated on me," she said at last. "I never really managed to work out why two of the people I should've been able to rely on most in the world would do that."

"'cause they wanted to have their cake and eat it. Greed, Harry, pure and simple."

She nodded rapidly, looking away from him, ashamed of the tears that she didn't seem able to stop crying.

"An' I'd stake my life on 'em not bein' together no more. Am I right, ha?"

A little sob of hysterical laughter from her clawed at Dempsey's heart.

"They lasted five months – right up until the baby would've been born. Like it was all for nothing! All quite prophetic I suppose."

He longed to put his arms around her again, to soothe and reassure but he had a niggling feeling that she wouldn't want that. It was she who had broken that physical contact because she needed to be strong, for her own sake. Letting go of her emotions that way must've damn-near killed her.

"All this shit goin' on with the Montgomerys… him with Inga… guess it's been pretty hard to swallow."

"She should leave him."

"Maybe she don't know."

"She knows." Harry answered quietly. "Deep down, she knows."

Dempsey bowed to her feminine instincts. "And she's hangin' in there because she loves him or because of the baby?"

"Because she's scared of being alone. The same as everyone else."

The moment the words left her lips he could see she regretted them. She took a step towards the bathtub and pointed a tentative finger. "I need to shower properly. I need to wash…"

Dempsey scratched at his brow as he tried to come up with an adequate reply. He found none.

"'kay. Sure. I guess I'll leave you to it."

He backed up to the door. "You need anythin'?"

Harry shook he head with a faint smile. "No." And then as he was about to turn away she said almost shyly, "Thank you."

Dempsey knew it was more than just an acknowledgement of his offer, he heard the warmth of gratitude also, a commodity to be earned and savoured in a quiet moment of reflection.

"No problem," he smiled back. "Lemme know when you're done."

Dempsey had been sitting in front of the T.V. for the last half hour, an episode of Tales of the Unexpected that he hadn't really been able to get into playing out on the screen.

At the sound of footfall on the stairs, he waited for the small creak of the door, counted to three and then casually turned to look over the back of the sofa as Harry emerged from the stairwell.

"Hi," he said, drawing her attention to him, sitting there partially obscured in the semi-darkness.

"Hello."

Cautiously, she stepped further forward into the room, her arms wrapped about herself as though she was cold despite the humid heat of the night.

"Okay?"

She nodded and as she moved closer, he could see she was wearing a baggy T-shirt style nightdress.

"My head's banging though. I'm hoping I packed the aspirin."

"I took your stuff up to the bedroom," said Dempsey, pre-empting her next question as he watched her scan the room for her belongings. "Figured you'd probably sleep better in a bed tonight."

Harry looked at him in surprise but then perched carefully beside him on the dingy sofa.

"Thanks. I'm not going to argue."

"You're not?"

She glanced at him, smiling wanly at his gentle jibe. "What time is it?"

"Comin' up ten-thirty."

"Oh? I thought it was later."

Her awkwardness was almost a physical thing as she gripped the hem of her nightdress to pull it taut over her knees.

"Been a long night," he pointed out.

Dempsey sat back into the corner of the sofa, his unbuttoned shirt gaping open and one bare foot up languidly on the coffee table, hoping to make her feel more at ease.

"Yes, it has."

It sounded like she was gritting her teeth.

Her hands smoothed over her knees. "I'm sorry to have burdened you with all of this. You must think I'm completely unhinged."

He chose his words carefully, propping his elbow on the back of the sofa and resting his head on his hand as he spoke.

"I think it's something you shoulda gotten off your chest a long time ago…" He smiled and she looked towards him, sensing he had something else to add. "But I'm kinda glad it was me you offloaded onto."

She quickly looked away again, staring fixedly at the fingers laced together over her knees. "Actually, you're probably the last person I would have wanted to know."

All Dempsey's casual bravado slipped away. "I ain't feelin' the love here," he quipped.

"We're in each other's pockets as it is, neither of us needs something like this adding fuel to the fire."

He froze inside, reading so much more than he wanted to into her words.

"Adding fuel to the fire? What, so because we don't always see eye to eye, you think I'd use it as ammunition against you?" he asked with shocked amazement. "You think that?"

"No, Dempsey, of course I don't think that!" Harry cried. "I just meant we're together so much of the time, your knowing such a personal thing about me… it might feel awkward – for both of us… don't you think?"

Harry looked down at her hands again and sighed. "Sorry, I'm not making myself very clear, am I? I mean, I think I've managed to put both of us in an embarrassing position…"

"Well, I ain't embarrassed," he said lightly with a small shrug. "So there ya go, I just cut the awkward factor in half. Looks like you're in the hot seat all by yourself, Makepeace."

Harry looked up and met his eyes, a small smile forming on her lips. "You do have a strange way of oversimplifying things, don't you?"

"So why don't you try this one on for size – you go on up to bed, you get a good night's sleep and in the morning everything is hunky-dory. You like the sound of that one, ha?"

He was offering her a get out of jail free card. No further questioning. A reprieve.

She accepted with both hands.

"Hunky-dory?" she repeated softly with a twinkle of amusement. "Is that a promise?"

"Would I lie to you?"

"Well I have to admit, it does sound quite appealing."

She stood, still a little uncertain of how to leave it.

"Okay, so I'll see you in the morning," Dempsey said, casually.

He turned his attention back to the television set, effectively dismissing her and gratefully, Harry left the room to seek comfort in the deep dark void of slumber.