A/N: Here's the next chapter. I've been meaning to ask you guys something… Part one of my story, the Hogwarts-part, is almost over. However, the full story is not. On the contrary… So my question is: should I continue adding the post-Hogwarts part to this thread or should I create a whole new story? Cause I know that some people aren't that interested in Marauder-stories that don't take place at Hogwarts. However, I'm sure there are many people who'd love to read on about the adventures of Mary and Sirius… So please let me know what you think!
Second, one of you asked if things will get really bad at one time? The answer is: yes, unfortunately. This story is meant to end in line with canon, meaning that James and Lily will die and that Sirius ends up in Azkaban… But there's a lot of happiness and action/adventure that takes place before the end, so you better keep on reading haha.
Third, I'll be going on a brief holiday tomorrow, so I won't be putting any new chapters up till next Friday or Saturday. Just so you know…
Anyway, I hope you enjoy this one! –Mara
Chapter Thirty-Six:
"That is all there is to it?" Lily asked incredulously.
"Yep," Mary nodded as she used her wand to highlight an important line on Imperturbable Charms in her book.
She was lying flat on her stomach in the grass and had put her book up against her bag. It was the end of April and today was the very first sunny day of the year. Mary, Lily and Brice had decided that if they were going to have to study on a day like this, they could at least combine the useful with the pleasant and study on the grounds. And so, the girls had been working on their studies in their usual spot under a large oak tree near the lake for the last few hours.
"So as long as we're holding hands-," Lily continued thoughtfully.
"You and James will be fine," Mary replied calmly before unwrapping a chocolate frog and biting its head off. "Sirius and I have tried it a few times now and nothing peculiar has ever occurred."
Lily snorted and flipped a page of her Transfiguration book before repositioning herself against the tree trunk. "I cannot wait to see James's face. Are you sure that Sirius didn't tell him about it?"
Mary shrugged and looked down at her Wizard card. "Ugh, not Paracelsus again. Anyway, I made him promise, but since I couldn't keep our first night together a secret for a day, I feel that I don't really have a say in this."
"I suppose so, but I'm still hoping that James doesn't have a clue. I want to surprise him."
"At least something is happening with you guys," Brice suddenly grumbled. She had been focusing on deciphering a complicated-looking Arithmancy assignment for the last hour and hadn't been talking much until now. "Me on the other hand... I'm still getting nowhere," she muttered while fiddling with the feather of her quill.
It didn't come as a surprise that Brice was talking about Remus. They had been on four dates, but he still hadn't made a serious move. And this – understandingly – was frustrating her a lot. Mary shot her friend a sympathetic look. "I'm sure he'll make the move eventually, Brice. He's just being shy."
"He's just being Remus, you mean," Lily observed.
Brice scowled. "I don't care if he's the bloody Supreme Mugwump of the International Confederation of Wizards! I don't know what I'm doing wrong here. I'm being sweet and understanding, I'm dressing up nicely, I'm sashaying in front of him; I even laugh at his jokes which - quite frankly - aren't always that funny. Seriously, I'm running out of ideas here."
"You could kiss him," Lily suggested.
Brice looked at her as if she had just asked her to dance and sing a song in front of the entire school. "Of course I cannot kiss him."
"Why not?"
"Because…" she spluttered. "That isn't… It's not… That just isn't how it is supposed to go."
Mary sniggered. "You mean you've got your relationship completely mapped out already, wedding and future kids included?"
"No, of course not!" Brice cried, looking flustered, before continuing in a much quieter voice. "At least not the kids part," which made the other girls laugh and even Brice chuckled before determinedly saying: "But I am not going to kiss him first."
"In that case you're just going to have to be more patient," Lily concluded before pointing her wand at a passing frog and muttering Ciris Papiliosis. Her Cross-Species Switch Spell didn't succeed entirely, because although the frog was now having a butterfly head and a set of orange coloured wings, it still had the lower body of a frog. This became a serious problem when the butterfly part tried to fly off and had to drag its frog legs along with him, making the animal sway dangerously above the ground. "Wait," Lily cried as she jumped up quickly. "I can make it better, please come back!" she called while attempting to catch the poor animal.
"Ever heard of a Summoning Spell, Lil?" Mary asked as she stretched lazily and watched the spectacle with an amused look on her face.
Lily shot her an annoyed look before aiming her wand and opening her mouth, right when a male voice said "Accio", causing the butterflied frog to fly right into the hands of… James. "Well well, what have we got here, boys?" he said, sniggering as he showed the animal to the other guys.
"Looks like a Cross-Species Transformation gone bad," Sirius concluded after taking a closer look.
"Is that painful?" Peter asked.
Remus laughed. "Honestly Pete, sometimes I think you should be taking our second year again when it comes to Transfiguration."
Lily, who had walked up to the boys, shot her boyfriend an annoyed look. "Give it back to me, James, so that I can correct my mistake."
He smirked. "Ah, I don't know if that would be such a good idea, Lil. As Headboy, I'm obliged to act against and report any animal mutilation."
She rolled her eyes. "James Potter…" she said in such a threatening tone that it made Sirius, Remus and Peter jump back a few feet and they hurried over to Mary and Brice.
James opened his hand so that the spell could reach its target. Lily restored her mistake with one wave of her wand and gave him a cold stare. "Done," she said coolly before walking back to sit down against the tree.
James quickly followed her and, as he sat down next to Lily, he hugged her close. "Sorry if I was being a git."
Lily looked at him and laughed. "Oh James, I know you can't help yourself. It is part of who you are and even though it can be annoying sometimes, I will love you anyway."
"I love you too," he said, gently tucking a lock of her auburn hair behind her ear before he kissed her.
Mary watched their embrace with mixed feelings. James and Lily had been publicly stating that they loved each other for a while now. Although Mary was feeling happy for them, the fact that she and Sirius hadn't reached that point yet was bugging her. They had told each other "You're amazing" or "You're so sweet" on numerous occasions, but that wasn't the same as those three little words put together.
Even though Mary knew that she loved Sirius, she still hadn't told him how she really felt. She feared that he would be running off faster than the speed of light if she did. That day in the stables when she told him he was becoming her big love and his shocked response wasn't something she would like to relive anytime soon. Even now, she felt Sirius stir uncomfortably next to her as he looked from James and Lily to her and back. Mary picked up her Charms book and that finally caught his full attention. "The Imperturbable charm?" he asked.
Mary nodded. "Flitwick gave us a hint that this one could be in our NEWT the other day, don't you remember?"
Sirius huffed. "I already know that stuff." For a moment he was looking just as arrogant as he had been in fifth year, until his expression softened as he smiled at Mary and put an arm around her. "But I suppose it wouldn't hurt to give it another look."
"Arrrrrrgh!" Brice suddenly growled before chucking away another piece of parchment. "I'm never going to solve this assignment. It's too hard."
"Do you want me to take a look?" Remus asked.
Brice looked sideways at him. She looked like she had only just noticed that he was sitting next to her. "But you're not taking Arithmancy."
"No, but I happen to be very clever, so maybe I can help you out after all."
"But… This assignment is particularly complicated."
"Why don't you let me decide that for myself?" Remus smiled before he put an arm around Brice and leaned in to take a closer look at her assignment.
Mary and Lily exchanged significant glances and James smiled as he watched Remus and Brice for a moment, before looking at Sirius. "Have you asked her yet, Padfoot?"
"Asked me what?" Mary said absent-mindedly while she was trying to tear her gaze off a cuddling Brice and Remus.
"Well, Prongs here asked me to do the patrolling tonight with you instead of him and Lily."
"Oh," Mary said, looking surprised. "Why?"
Lily cleared her throat. "I second that: why?"
"Well," James said, smiling mysteriously. "I thought it would be great if we could have the night off and spend it together."
"What, like a date?" Lily frowned.
"Yeah, I suppose you could call it a date," he laughed before looking at Mary. "So will you do it?"
"Sure, no problem," Mary said. She smiled back untill her eyes suddenly fell on Professor Zabini who was walking towards them. "Oh bugger!" she groaned and quickly tried to hide behind Sirius's back, but it was already too late.
"Good day, ladies and gents," Zabini's cheerful voice sounded.
"Good day, professor," they echoed.
"I see that even on such a lovely day, you're still studying for your NEWT exams. Very wise indeed. I heard the exams are even harder than last year. And you need good grades to get into the continuation schooling programs of your choice. Ah well, it is not my intention to keep you up much longer, but I wonder if Miss Woods – once she has finished trying to locate something behind Mr. Black's back of course - could join me for a walk around the lake."
Mary, still hiding behind Sirius's back, peered around his shoulder. "What, like now?"
"I don't have all day, but I promise it won't take much of your time," the Professor said kindly.
"Go on," Sirius muttered while softly pushing Mary back up.
She reluctantly walked to Zabini and, as he started to walk away, shot a weary look over her shoulder at Lily before following him. She had a sneaky suspicion what Zabini wanted to talk about. She hadn't exactly been hiding the fact that she wasn't interested in becoming an Auror after all, but she also hadn't told him about it like she promised, nor given a clear explanation. Mary's presumption turned out to be correct as Zabini – hardly out of earshot of the others – turned towards her and said: "So it's not going to be the Auror Program after all."
"I'm afraid not, sir," Mary replied.
Zabini gave her a piercing look. "Have you given the possibility serious thought?"
"Yes, I have. I did consider it, but I've come to the conclusion that I want to be a Healer. I just want to help and heal people; that is my dream. I am sorry if that disappoints you, sir."
Zabini laughed. "Mary, I'm not disappointed, although it is a very sad day for the Auror Program. However, I must stress that you will keep up your game when it comes to duelling. You may not notice it at Hogwarts, but the outer world is no longer a safe place at the moment. Especially for a Muggle-born like yourself…"
"Is it really that bad?"
Zabini stared over the lake for a moment. "I wish I could tell you that the Ministry is exaggerating, but Voldemort's power is increasing every day. Not that there isn't anything done about it."
"But I thought the Ministry was lacking-"
"-Forget about the Ministry. Listen, I cannot make you promise to keep this quiet, but I need you to tell as little people as possible, but Dumbledore… Let's just say that there are plans to… to organise a group of skilled wizards without the Ministry's knowledge. This group will fight the Death Eaters and try to prevent Voldemort from gaining ultimate power."
Mary frowned. "Sir, you mean like an… army?"
Zabini smiled. "Yes, I suppose that's what you could call it. Anyway, I am confident that this group is blessed should you and your friends would decide to join. Would you be interested in fighting for a good cause?"
"Er… I suppose so, but wouldn't that be dangerous?"
"Extremely hazardous."
Mary couldn't suppress a grin. "Well, then I'm sure you can count James and Sirius in."
"Now why doesn't that surprise me? But either way, focus on passing your exams first. I'm sure Dumbledore won't mention any of this until you graduate. Right, I will not keep you up any longer. Good luck and if you ever change your mind about your career, don't hesitate to switch. The Auror Program would be honored to have you."
Zabini was about to walk off, when Mary called after him: "Sir, what am I going to tell the others?"
He chuckled. "Shall we just say that your decision shattered my hart into a thousand pieces?" He gave her a meaningful look, winked and walked away.
Mary remained standing there for another while and pondered over what Zabini said before she forced herself to walk back to the others. Even though they knew that Voldemort was on the rise, it all seemed so far away at Hogwarts. Sure, they all read the Daily Prophet and parents of students did occasionally die or disappear, but any of that hadn't happened to her or her close friends. And because it seemed highly unlikely that Voldemort would ever dare to attack the school, most students felt pretty safe around here. But how would it be outside the safe boundaries of Hogwarts? In two months, they would have graduated and then what? Were they going to have to watch their backs constantly?
When Mary had finally reached the others, they were packing their things to get ready for dinner. Sirius handed Mary her bag and Charms book. "How did it go?"
Mary – still thinking about the post-Hogwarts life – didn't answer immediately. "What?"
Sirius shot her a puzzled look. "The talk with Zabini. How did he take it?"
"Oh that," Mary said while she and Sirius followed the others to the castle. "He said it was a black day for the Auror Office and that I shattered his heart into a thousand pieces."
He chuckled and reached for her hand. "At least you managed to break one heart today. Come on, if we hurry up we'll be in time for supper. I heard we're having lamb chops tonight."
After dinner (Sirius had been right, the house-elves served lamb chops), they all went back to the Common Room. All of them but James and Lily, because he had "abducted" her before supper, saying that they would be having dinner somewhere else.
Sirius, Peter and Remus played a few games of Exploding Snap and Brice assisted Mary in resolving today's crossword puzzle in the Daily Prophet, until it was time for Sirius and Mary to go patrolling the corridors of Hogwarts.
They walked down the first floor in silence until Sirius reached into his robes and pulled out his wand and an old piece of parchment. "I think it's time we got some assistance."
Mary looked down at the parchment. "Is that the infamous Marauder's Map? That is some form of extraordinary advanced magic."
"Hu-um," Sirius nodded before tapping the parchment and muttering: "I solemny swear that I am up to no good."
Mary snorted. "That is something only you guys could come up with. Who's idea was it anyway?"
"You'd be surprised if you knew."
"Was it you?"
"No."
"James?"
"Nope. It was Moony's idea."
Mary stared at him. "Remus came up with that slogan?"
"Yes, he did," Sirius said proudly and he laughed at Mary's stunned face. "Oh, you girls all have this image of Remus being shy and responsible, but he's a lot more mischievous than you think."
"Remus… Well, have I ever?" Mary muttered, looking astonished before looking down at the Map. "Oooh look, Hufflepuffs Caroline Lazeby and Larry Everett are having a good time in that empty classroom on the fourth floor."
"Time to intervene their private little party, then," Sirius grinned.
When they had arrived on the "crime scene" and Sirius was telling off a sulking Caroline and Larry for breaking the rules, Larry called him "a filthy hypocrite" which made Mary laugh aloud. Sirius imperturbably adapted an even sterner look and sent the couple straight back to the Hufflepuff Common Room. He then looked at Mary, who was leaning against the wall, still giggling. "A lot of help of you are."
She laughed, placing a hand on her stomach. "You've got to admit; the guy has a point. Come on, we'd better check the other rooms in this corridor as well." She was about to open the door of the next classroom, when Sirius suddenly said: "Wait."
Mary, still holding the door handle, shot Sirius an amused look. "What, is Peeves hiding in there?"
"No… But there is something I should tell you."
Mary, feeling apprehensive because of his sudden serious tone, let go of the handle and walked over to him. "Yes…?" she asked uncertainly.
Sirius fiddled with a decrepit corner of the Marauders Map for a moment. "I've been thinking about this for quite some time now and I feel the time is right to eh… to say or express… No, to make clear that… Well, you know."
Mary frowned at him and looked more confused than ever.
"You don't know", Sirius said, trying to read Mary's frown. When she slowly shook her head, he sighed. "I suck at doing this. Frankly, this part always worries me because even though I watched others do it, I cannot… Well, I tried before obviously but that's not the point, but it's seems to be impossible for me to admit that… that I…"
"Hang on, are you saying that you…?" Mary asked in a quivering voice and Sirius shot her a hopeful look, silently begging her to say the words first. "Are you… Are you breaking up with me?"
Sirius stared at her with his mouth hanging open. "Huh?" was all he managed to stammer.
"Because to do that now, right after I slept with you, would be really vicious," she said with tears in her eyes.
Sirius - still looking dumbfounded – tried to make sense of what was happening. How could Mary get it so wrong? "But…?"
"Sorry, I can't take this," Mary interrupted him shortly and turned around, but Sirius stopped her by grabbing her hand.
"No wait, you don't understand. Mare, I don't want to break up with you."
"Oh," she said, looking relieved. "But… Why did you say that this was the hardest part?"
Sirius thought about his lack of choosing the right words. "I suppose I was rambling a bit."
"I'm sorry, but to call that flood of incoherent words coming out of your mouth rambling would be an understatement."
Sirius cupped her face. "You're right, I was being stupid, but this is not easy for me." He closed his eyes for a moment and took a deep breath. "What I want to say is: I love you, did you know that?"
Mary stared into his sincere eyes. She had thought that since that awkward moment in her parent's stables, she knew all about Sirius's fear to commit, but she finally understood now. For him, saying "I love you" was more than simply declaring his love. It meant that he was finally placing his trust in her, their relationship and most of all: their future. Knowing that meant the world to her, much more than finally hearing those lovely, but burdened words. Nevertheless, right when Sirius was starting to interpret her silence the wrong way and shot her an insecure look, she smiled and stroke his hair before whispering: "I love you too."
End of Update
A/N: I wrote the final part of this Chapter (Sirius telling Mary he loves her) with James Morrison's song "You give me something" in my head. It perfectly fits my view on Sirius in his younger years. I'm not sure if I'm allowed to post links, but I can post the lyrics, so here they are (and if you don't know this song yet, listen to it and I'm sure that you'll hear why it has gotten (younger) Sirius written all over it.
You
want to stay with me in the morning 'Cause you give me something You already waited up for hours 'Cause you give me something 'Cause you
give me something
You only hold me when I
sleep,
I was meant to tread the water
Now I've gotten in too
deep,
For every piece of me that wants you
Another piece
backs away.
That makes me
scared, alright,
This could be nothing
But I'm willing to
give it a try,
Please give me something
'Cause someday I
might know my heart.
Just
to spend a little time alone with me,
And I can say I've never
bought you flowers
I can't work out what they mean,
I never
thought that I'd love someone,
That was someone else's dream.
That makes me scared,
alright,
This could be nothing
But I'm willing to give it a
try,
Please give me something,
'Cause someday I might call
you from my heart,
But it might me a second too late,
And the
words I could never say
Gonna come out anyway.
That makes me scared, alright,
This could
be nothing
But I'm willing to give it a try,
Please give me
something
'Cause someday I might know my heart.